1 00:00:11,096 --> 00:00:12,723 [static and high pitched tone] 2 00:00:14,641 --> 00:00:16,894 - [Josh] So what are you here for? - [male investigator] We're part 3 00:00:16,977 --> 00:00:18,854 of a specialized task force, and that task force is called 4 00:00:18,937 --> 00:00:20,898 the Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force. 5 00:00:20,981 --> 00:00:23,525 - [Josh] Yep. - [male investigator] Based on an ongoing 6 00:00:23,609 --> 00:00:27,529 investigation, we were able to get from this IP address 7 00:00:27,654 --> 00:00:32,659 um, one specific video of child pornography, and one folder containing 8 00:00:32,743 --> 00:00:35,579 approximately 65 images of child pornography. 9 00:00:35,662 --> 00:00:36,580 - [Josh] Okay. - [male investigator] All right? 10 00:00:36,663 --> 00:00:39,082 [Josh] Is there something going on on my devices? 11 00:00:39,166 --> 00:00:40,375 [male investigator] That's what led us here, yes. 12 00:00:40,459 --> 00:00:41,543 [Josh] Okay. 13 00:00:42,377 --> 00:00:45,339 [male reporter] HSI was in Springdale investigating a business 14 00:00:45,422 --> 00:00:47,090 associated with Josh Duggar. 15 00:00:47,466 --> 00:00:49,635 I talked to my brother and he said, 16 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:55,057 it's just this ex-con that worked at his car lot, and it's all gonna be fine. 17 00:00:55,140 --> 00:00:58,894 This is all gonna blow over. It's not true, none of it's true. 18 00:01:00,604 --> 00:01:02,689 [Michelle] Ah, the things that children will do 19 00:01:02,773 --> 00:01:04,650 when their parents are not around. 20 00:01:04,733 --> 00:01:06,610 You know that verse that says, 21 00:01:06,693 --> 00:01:10,030 "A child left to itself will bring its mother to shame?" 22 00:01:10,113 --> 00:01:11,240 That is so true. 23 00:01:11,907 --> 00:01:14,952 "The Sun" showed up at our door, and they were like, so is it true? 24 00:01:15,035 --> 00:01:16,370 Your brother's about to be arrested? 25 00:01:16,453 --> 00:01:18,747 And I was like, I don't wanna comment on that. 26 00:01:19,790 --> 00:01:21,542 Well, reality TV star Josh Duggar, 27 00:01:21,625 --> 00:01:23,335 of 19 and Counting fame has been arrested 28 00:01:23,418 --> 00:01:25,420 by US Marshals in Arkansas. 29 00:01:25,504 --> 00:01:28,465 Disturbing allegations against a member of the Duggar family. 30 00:01:28,549 --> 00:01:30,467 I just couldn't believe what was in the news. 31 00:01:30,551 --> 00:01:33,469 I said, I think we're living in the Twilight Zone. 32 00:01:33,554 --> 00:01:37,933 Josh Duggar indicted for downloading and possessing child pornography. 33 00:01:38,016 --> 00:01:41,478 He's facing two counts for receiving and possessing child porn. 34 00:01:42,145 --> 00:01:43,564 [male reporter recording] Mr. Duggar, did you download 35 00:01:43,647 --> 00:01:44,982 child pornography onto your computer? 36 00:01:45,064 --> 00:01:46,859 [female reporter voiceover] He didn't say anything to the media. 37 00:01:46,942 --> 00:01:50,112 He got into that black SUV waiting for him, and drove off. 38 00:01:50,403 --> 00:01:55,617 A spokesperson for TLC tells ET that the network will not be moving forward 39 00:01:55,701 --> 00:01:57,870 with the Duggar family's reality series. 40 00:01:59,830 --> 00:02:04,042 It's like the epitome of evil. I don't think there's anything worse. 41 00:02:04,126 --> 00:02:07,588 [haunting choral music] 42 00:02:12,801 --> 00:02:14,011 [music crescendos] 43 00:02:15,721 --> 00:02:19,474 Bobye says, Jim, we have company, it's Homeland Security. 44 00:02:19,558 --> 00:02:22,603 They sit down and said, "Mr. Holt, I'm sure you know why we're here." 45 00:02:22,686 --> 00:02:25,146 He starts talking and he goes, "Well, it's about Josh Duggar." 46 00:02:25,606 --> 00:02:29,359 They said it wasn't about his past history. 47 00:02:30,110 --> 00:02:31,987 It was something different. 48 00:02:32,279 --> 00:02:34,740 - [slow eerie music plays] - [Derick] I texted Josh and I just said, 49 00:02:34,823 --> 00:02:37,784 "Hey, I'm hearing rumors. "Is that even true?" 50 00:02:37,868 --> 00:02:41,330 And he's like, "Absolutely not, especially something of that nature." 51 00:02:41,747 --> 00:02:43,372 [male reporter] The Duggar family released a statement, quote, 52 00:02:43,457 --> 00:02:46,126 "As to any investigation being conducted, to our knowledge, 53 00:02:46,209 --> 00:02:49,463 no member of our family is a target of any investigation." 54 00:02:49,546 --> 00:02:51,256 [Derick] On the day that our family statement's put out, 55 00:02:51,340 --> 00:02:53,717 we know that the family had knowledge 56 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:57,512 that there's a child pornography investigation against Josh, 57 00:02:57,596 --> 00:02:59,056 and they had that knowledge on the same day 58 00:02:59,139 --> 00:03:00,015 that they made the statement. 59 00:03:00,098 --> 00:03:02,851 Yeah, you might have fooled the public, but eventually, 60 00:03:02,935 --> 00:03:05,395 if there's something to this, people are gonna realize it. 61 00:03:05,479 --> 00:03:08,023 I think we were curious to just see 62 00:03:08,106 --> 00:03:09,942 how everything unfolded, and to get the truth. 63 00:03:10,025 --> 00:03:11,485 [tense music] 64 00:03:11,568 --> 00:03:14,821 [male reporter] Testimony began today in the trial of Josh Duggar. 65 00:03:14,905 --> 00:03:17,032 After opening statements, prosecutors presented 66 00:03:17,115 --> 00:03:20,702 the jury with a computer that was found at Duggar's car dealership. 67 00:03:20,786 --> 00:03:23,330 [Jen] The entire FundieSnark community obviously had 68 00:03:23,413 --> 00:03:26,333 a vested interest in this story, and I followed it very closely. 69 00:03:26,416 --> 00:03:29,169 The prosecution was able to point out 70 00:03:29,252 --> 00:03:32,464 every single time Josh downloaded these images, 71 00:03:32,547 --> 00:03:35,384 they have it pinpointed to the exact moment. 72 00:03:35,467 --> 00:03:37,594 [female reporter] The agent also says that Duggar had a program 73 00:03:37,678 --> 00:03:39,763 on his computer called Covenant Eyes, 74 00:03:39,846 --> 00:03:42,140 which the agent called accountability software. 75 00:03:42,223 --> 00:03:45,394 With Covenant Eyes, I'm winning the fight against porn every day. 76 00:03:45,477 --> 00:03:47,813 [Jen] Covenant Eyes makes reports of all the websites 77 00:03:47,896 --> 00:03:52,067 you've been on, and it sends them to a trusted accountabili-buddy. 78 00:03:52,150 --> 00:03:54,778 [female reporter] While the public facing portion of the computer 79 00:03:54,860 --> 00:03:56,738 appeared to be mostly business related, 80 00:03:56,822 --> 00:03:59,574 the hard drive had in fact been split in two. 81 00:03:59,658 --> 00:04:02,536 [Jen] Josh has always been known to be tech savvy. 82 00:04:02,619 --> 00:04:07,374 He would've been the only one who knew how to circumvent the Covenant Eyes software. 83 00:04:07,624 --> 00:04:09,001 [female reporter] The agent described the images 84 00:04:09,084 --> 00:04:12,921 as in the top five of the worst of the worst that he has ever examined. 85 00:04:13,422 --> 00:04:15,340 [Amy] The things that he looked at, 86 00:04:15,424 --> 00:04:18,050 and the things that he enjoyed and got pleasure from 87 00:04:18,134 --> 00:04:22,180 absolutely breaks my heart into a million pieces. 88 00:04:22,264 --> 00:04:23,724 [dramatic theme music bellows] 89 00:04:24,683 --> 00:04:27,853 It was horrible, because you sometimes feel like you failed. 90 00:04:27,936 --> 00:04:29,271 Could we have tried more? 91 00:04:29,354 --> 00:04:31,023 [emotional music swells] 92 00:04:31,690 --> 00:04:35,485 When it's a friend doing things that are so vile, 93 00:04:35,569 --> 00:04:40,449 and so wicked, that part really hurts. That's why I cry. 94 00:04:43,243 --> 00:04:45,746 They seemed like such good people. 95 00:04:46,830 --> 00:04:48,040 The sweetest family. 96 00:04:48,874 --> 00:04:51,418 The way the show portrayed them was perfect. 97 00:04:51,710 --> 00:04:53,253 [uplifting music plays] 98 00:04:53,754 --> 00:04:57,174 [Bobye continues] Everything was always sunshiny and rosy. 99 00:04:58,258 --> 00:05:01,011 I really think people put them on a pedestal, 100 00:05:01,094 --> 00:05:04,181 but we know for a fact that there was such heartache 101 00:05:04,264 --> 00:05:06,683 that they really did just have to put a face on. 102 00:05:08,894 --> 00:05:13,565 They have to be happy all the time. They can never show real emotion. 103 00:05:14,775 --> 00:05:19,321 They can never deal with what could be rumbling inside of their hearts. 104 00:05:19,404 --> 00:05:21,698 [Michelle] Well, you guys can't kiss yet, but you can hold hands. 105 00:05:21,782 --> 00:05:22,949 - [Jim Bob] That's right. (chuckling) - [Michelle] Your first kiss- 106 00:05:23,033 --> 00:05:24,451 - [Jim Bob] We'll do the kissing. - We'll do the kissing. 107 00:05:24,534 --> 00:05:27,287 [Jim Bob] If you feel the urge to kiss, just tell us, and we'll kiss. 108 00:05:28,747 --> 00:05:31,541 [Michelle] We've prepared him all these years for this moment, 109 00:05:31,625 --> 00:05:35,337 and I just am excited about their future. 110 00:05:35,670 --> 00:05:37,214 [uplifting music plays] 111 00:05:37,631 --> 00:05:41,218 Josh Duggar is charged with one count of possession of child pornography, 112 00:05:41,301 --> 00:05:44,930 and if convicted, he could face up to 20 years in prison and a 250… 113 00:05:45,013 --> 00:05:46,681 [Jim off screen] There was an evidentiary hearing 114 00:05:46,765 --> 00:05:50,060 to determine what evidence would be given at trial. 115 00:05:50,351 --> 00:05:52,896 The prosecution wanted to see if they could use 116 00:05:52,979 --> 00:05:56,274 the prior allegations of Josh molesting his sisters. 117 00:05:56,358 --> 00:05:58,360 [Jill] Nobody obviously wants to testify, 118 00:05:58,443 --> 00:06:01,113 but I was prepared to testify against my brother. 119 00:06:01,196 --> 00:06:03,532 I guess they got what they needed from somebody else, 120 00:06:03,615 --> 00:06:05,408 and didn't have to have me testify. 121 00:06:06,660 --> 00:06:09,496 [female reporter] Today, the jury heard from former Duggar family friends. 122 00:06:09,746 --> 00:06:12,833 I took the stand, and I really felt like it was important 123 00:06:12,916 --> 00:06:17,921 to acknowledge to everyone in the room, and everyone that might hear this, 124 00:06:18,004 --> 00:06:20,423 that God knows that I'm gonna tell the truth, 125 00:06:20,507 --> 00:06:24,928 and I have to stand before Him one day for what I say, or what I don't say, 126 00:06:25,011 --> 00:06:30,392 or what I do, and what I don't do, and so I did. I said, I do, so help me God. 127 00:06:31,434 --> 00:06:35,272 The jury got to see that there is a pattern in Josh's life 128 00:06:35,355 --> 00:06:41,695 that he began early on, and he got by with it time and time again. 129 00:06:41,820 --> 00:06:45,824 - [dramatic music plays] - [Jen] Bobye Holt was exposing everybody 130 00:06:45,907 --> 00:06:49,577 because she was saying everybody knew, this was an open secret. 131 00:06:49,661 --> 00:06:53,748 Josh had molested several of his sisters, and they swept it under the rug. 132 00:06:55,959 --> 00:07:00,130 That was a huge relief when I was done. 133 00:07:00,213 --> 00:07:03,884 It was almost like we had waited all of these years 134 00:07:03,967 --> 00:07:08,597 - just to be able to say that. - And we were taken seriously. 135 00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:11,975 Yes. At one point, Jim Bob told you you were jealous. 136 00:07:12,058 --> 00:07:17,939 He said, "Jim Bob, I would not trade places with you for a bazillion dollars." 137 00:07:18,815 --> 00:07:20,984 [male reporter recording] Morning, Jim Bob. How you doing today, sir? 138 00:07:21,067 --> 00:07:22,986 [male reporter voiceover] Jim Bob, who you see entering court here, 139 00:07:23,069 --> 00:07:25,572 testified too about what his son told him. 140 00:07:25,655 --> 00:07:26,573 [dramatic music plays] 141 00:07:26,656 --> 00:07:29,659 [Dillon] At one point, the prosecuting attorney came up to him and she said, 142 00:07:29,743 --> 00:07:33,205 "Heres the police report. Do you recognize the things that you said in there?" 143 00:07:33,288 --> 00:07:35,624 And he goes, "Well, I don't recall really." 144 00:07:35,707 --> 00:07:38,043 The fact that he can say that he doesn't remember 145 00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:42,464 his own daughter's abuse makes me sick. 146 00:07:42,547 --> 00:07:44,591 He kept answering all the questions like, 147 00:07:44,674 --> 00:07:47,677 "I don't recall, I don't remember, that was so long ago." 148 00:07:47,761 --> 00:07:50,263 - He just flat out lied. - [Jen] The judge got mad at him 149 00:07:50,347 --> 00:07:52,682 and told him he couldn't come back, because he had a bad memory. 150 00:07:52,766 --> 00:07:55,476 From that moment, yeah, he's done. 151 00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:57,854 The hardest parts for me were the parts of like, 152 00:07:57,938 --> 00:08:01,274 the old stuff being brought up that should have never been out there. 153 00:08:01,358 --> 00:08:05,862 I just hope and pray that this never happens to anyone else ever again. 154 00:08:06,112 --> 00:08:07,364 [music intensifies] 155 00:08:07,530 --> 00:08:09,658 [female reporter] The case is in the jury's hands, 156 00:08:09,741 --> 00:08:11,159 and then we'll have to find out tomorrow 157 00:08:11,243 --> 00:08:13,745 exactly what's gonna happen with Joshua Duggar. 158 00:08:15,330 --> 00:08:16,873 [music crescendos] 159 00:08:17,582 --> 00:08:20,543 Tonight, 19 Kids and Counting star Jim Bob Duggar 160 00:08:20,627 --> 00:08:23,588 announcing today that he is running for a seat in the Arkansas Senate. 161 00:08:23,672 --> 00:08:27,509 As soon as I heard it, I absolutely just could not believe it. 162 00:08:27,884 --> 00:08:30,428 He actually texted you, didn't he? 163 00:08:30,512 --> 00:08:34,015 And sent you his website with the donation page. 164 00:08:34,099 --> 00:08:35,225 - Yeah. - Yeah. 165 00:08:35,308 --> 00:08:36,518 [female reporter] The news of Duggar's candidacy 166 00:08:36,643 --> 00:08:40,105 comes amid a federal child porn investigation against his son. 167 00:08:40,188 --> 00:08:44,234 I got a news alert on my phone, and I was like, what the what? 168 00:08:44,317 --> 00:08:45,402 [suspenseful music plays] 169 00:08:45,485 --> 00:08:48,321 [Heather] It's really, really bold to run for office 170 00:08:48,405 --> 00:08:52,325 while you have a son on trial for child sexual assault materials, 171 00:08:52,409 --> 00:08:56,538 but that is basically the embodiment of a fundamentalist dad. 172 00:08:56,621 --> 00:08:58,415 [female reporter] Duggar said in a news release today 173 00:08:58,498 --> 00:09:02,335 that he is running because of what he called out of control bureaucrats. 174 00:09:02,419 --> 00:09:05,505 We heard reports of conspiracy theories. 175 00:09:05,588 --> 00:09:08,967 Things like Josh's trial would never happen if Trump were still in office. 176 00:09:09,050 --> 00:09:11,177 This is a Obama appointed judge. 177 00:09:11,261 --> 00:09:13,888 [Jill] He was just grasping for anything. 178 00:09:14,097 --> 00:09:17,267 I don't think that he believed for a second that he was wrong. 179 00:09:18,101 --> 00:09:20,270 Satan's using this as a distraction to your family, 180 00:09:20,353 --> 00:09:23,440 and to bring down your ministry, so still run for office 181 00:09:23,523 --> 00:09:25,817 because you're still gonna do God's work. 182 00:09:25,900 --> 00:09:28,153 There's a world system that's being controlled by Satan 183 00:09:28,236 --> 00:09:29,446 that needs to be stood up against. 184 00:09:29,529 --> 00:09:31,906 That sort of mindset comes from the Institute. 185 00:09:31,990 --> 00:09:33,658 We are in a culture war. 186 00:09:33,742 --> 00:09:37,287 We wanna see that culture war won by the Lord. 187 00:09:38,121 --> 00:09:43,585 [Chad] Jim Bob lost, but their goal was to have one generation 188 00:09:43,668 --> 00:09:48,006 start off this godly chain of events that the next generation would amplify, 189 00:09:48,089 --> 00:09:52,010 until we essentially took over the entire world for Jesus Christ. 190 00:09:52,093 --> 00:09:53,219 That was their stated goal. 191 00:09:53,303 --> 00:09:55,930 There is always a bigger agenda. 192 00:09:56,014 --> 00:09:57,807 [officers shouting together] 193 00:09:57,891 --> 00:10:02,145 [Floyd] You wouldn't go to war in ancient times with a quiver of arrows 194 00:10:02,228 --> 00:10:04,481 that only has one or two arrows in it. 195 00:10:04,564 --> 00:10:05,982 [energetic music plays] 196 00:10:06,191 --> 00:10:09,694 You want as many arrows as you can to shoot at the enemy. 197 00:10:10,236 --> 00:10:12,489 [Jim Bob] That's what we're supposed to do with our children. 198 00:10:12,572 --> 00:10:16,576 Nurture them, and grow them, and then send them out into the world 199 00:10:16,659 --> 00:10:19,329 as strong arrows to have an impact on the world. 200 00:10:20,413 --> 00:10:22,290 [energetic music crescendos] 201 00:10:22,374 --> 00:10:26,628 The real story behind the Duggars is a much bigger one. 202 00:10:27,128 --> 00:10:30,673 The Joshua Generation is one of the most ambitious plots 203 00:10:30,757 --> 00:10:35,720 of modern evangelical history, and almost no one has ever heard of it. 204 00:10:35,804 --> 00:10:37,639 [energetic music plays] 205 00:10:37,764 --> 00:10:43,603 It's a decades long multi-generational plan to raise up an elite strike force 206 00:10:43,686 --> 00:10:45,730 of Christian homeschool graduates 207 00:10:45,814 --> 00:10:48,733 to infiltrate the highest levels of government. 208 00:10:48,817 --> 00:10:50,443 My name is Alex Harris. 209 00:10:50,527 --> 00:10:54,823 I'm a graduate of Harvard Law School, and I was a law clerk 210 00:10:54,906 --> 00:10:58,034 for Justice Anthony Kennedy of the US Supreme Court. 211 00:10:58,118 --> 00:11:01,955 I was previously one of the leaders of the Joshua Generation movement. 212 00:11:02,122 --> 00:11:03,415 [music continues] 213 00:11:03,623 --> 00:11:08,420 [Eve] A lot of the men who came up with the idea for the Joshua Generation 214 00:11:08,503 --> 00:11:12,841 were influenced by Gothard, attending IBLP seminars, 215 00:11:12,924 --> 00:11:15,552 and espousing Quiverfull ideals. 216 00:11:15,635 --> 00:11:18,721 Gothard was the template. He's got his hands in everything. 217 00:11:19,431 --> 00:11:22,058 Their kids were supposed to be this force 218 00:11:22,142 --> 00:11:25,645 that was gonna conquer for the kingdom of God. 219 00:11:26,771 --> 00:11:31,025 The whole purpose was really to position kind of the best and the brightest 220 00:11:31,109 --> 00:11:36,239 of the Christian homeschool movement to assume positions of power and influence 221 00:11:36,322 --> 00:11:37,615 in government and in the law. 222 00:11:38,741 --> 00:11:42,745 The goal was Christian homeschool graduates who would be US senators, 223 00:11:42,829 --> 00:11:46,541 who would be US presidents, and most importantly, 224 00:11:46,624 --> 00:11:49,043 who would be US Supreme Court justices… 225 00:11:49,878 --> 00:11:55,383 …In order to bring America back to its rightful position as a Christian nation. 226 00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:58,011 [Eve] It starts in high school with organizations 227 00:11:58,094 --> 00:12:00,930 like TeenPact and Generation Joshua, which were giving homeschooled 228 00:12:01,014 --> 00:12:04,267 teenagers civics training, organizing training. 229 00:12:04,726 --> 00:12:05,560 Vote for Mike! 230 00:12:05,643 --> 00:12:07,979 [male reporter through TV] These volunteers are Huck's Army, 231 00:12:08,062 --> 00:12:10,315 drawn here by Alex and Brett Harris. 232 00:12:10,398 --> 00:12:15,028 There were worldview camps and there were homeschool debate clubs that you could 233 00:12:15,111 --> 00:12:20,200 take on any liberal or atheist argument, or a statement, and debunk it. 234 00:12:20,366 --> 00:12:23,661 It's how we defend our faith. 235 00:12:23,745 --> 00:12:28,249 The training ground for the real battle ground that is the dark world outside. 236 00:12:28,541 --> 00:12:31,336 We would go to the capital all the time. 237 00:12:31,419 --> 00:12:34,547 I knew all of our representatives, and I knew the senators, 238 00:12:34,631 --> 00:12:36,466 so that we could say, hey, this is what we want. 239 00:12:36,549 --> 00:12:40,345 We want you to vote this way. We were loud, politically. 240 00:12:41,679 --> 00:12:47,143 You take these kids and give them training in political engagement, 241 00:12:47,227 --> 00:12:50,813 and then from there you send them into the halls of Congress, 242 00:12:50,897 --> 00:12:53,233 into the White House, as interns. 243 00:12:53,316 --> 00:12:57,612 You had institutions of higher education, first and foremost, Patrick Henry College, 244 00:12:57,695 --> 00:13:02,367 where I became positioned to do all of the things that I have done since. 245 00:13:02,450 --> 00:13:04,869 [female narrator] PHD graduates have served as press secretaries 246 00:13:04,953 --> 00:13:08,248 in the White House, Senate, and House of Representatives, 247 00:13:08,331 --> 00:13:12,585 have excelled at the FBI, CIA, and the Department of Homeland Security. 248 00:13:12,669 --> 00:13:17,048 [Eve] Clerking for Supreme Court justices, being in Trump's cabinet. 249 00:13:17,131 --> 00:13:19,551 They're popping up everywhere if you look for them. 250 00:13:19,634 --> 00:13:23,471 Meet Elise Hall. She's 21, and just won election 251 00:13:23,555 --> 00:13:26,391 to the Oklahoma State House of Representatives. 252 00:13:26,474 --> 00:13:29,561 Your left wing movement is forcing children to endure 253 00:13:29,644 --> 00:13:31,563 radical expressions of sexuality… 254 00:13:31,646 --> 00:13:35,942 The most prominent member of the Joshua Generation was Madison Cawthorn. 255 00:13:36,025 --> 00:13:39,821 Madam Speaker, a silent genocide has slipped beneath the conscience of America. 256 00:13:39,904 --> 00:13:42,740 I hope that the Supreme Court overturns Roe v. Wade. 257 00:13:42,824 --> 00:13:45,743 And he made it all the way to the US Congress. 258 00:13:45,827 --> 00:13:48,871 New this morning, North Carolina Congressman Madison Cawthorn 259 00:13:48,955 --> 00:13:51,416 addressing a new round of allegations. 260 00:13:51,499 --> 00:13:55,920 Cawthorn was aggressive, misogynistic, and predatory towards women. 261 00:13:56,004 --> 00:14:01,426 [Kristin] The most prominent leaders in this movement get caught up 262 00:14:01,551 --> 00:14:07,223 in abuse scandals, and the communities are really trained to move on. 263 00:14:07,765 --> 00:14:11,352 One of the Duggars is now running for Arkansas State representative in 2020. 264 00:14:12,103 --> 00:14:14,772 I'm a Christian, and I will stand up for religious liberties. 265 00:14:14,856 --> 00:14:17,150 I'm pro-life, and I will be an advocate for the unborn. 266 00:14:17,233 --> 00:14:21,154 [male reporter] In a sweeping ruling that overturned a half a century of precedents, 267 00:14:21,237 --> 00:14:23,698 five justices ended the right of American women 268 00:14:23,781 --> 00:14:25,867 to choose abortion under the Constitution. 269 00:14:26,159 --> 00:14:29,704 [Kristin] This isn't just about passing a law in this moment. 270 00:14:29,787 --> 00:14:34,458 It's about so much more. They are looking generations ahead. 271 00:14:34,542 --> 00:14:37,337 - They're playing the long game. - [suspenseful music plays] 272 00:14:37,420 --> 00:14:42,675 It's always been encouraged to use whatever technology is available to you 273 00:14:42,759 --> 00:14:44,761 to further the Christian agenda. 274 00:14:44,844 --> 00:14:49,557 Like the Duggars, so yeah, now you have influencer culture. 275 00:14:49,641 --> 00:14:54,646 [Heather] You have the rise of Christian influencers on Instagram, on TikTok. 276 00:14:54,729 --> 00:14:59,901 No, God did not make you gay. Does a thief come out born a thief? 277 00:14:59,984 --> 00:15:03,321 Social media seems almost tailor made for fundamentalism, 278 00:15:03,404 --> 00:15:08,743 because it allows these ideas a broader audience than they've ever had before. 279 00:15:08,826 --> 00:15:12,038 - [Morgan] Creation Museum! - [Paul] There it is! 280 00:15:12,121 --> 00:15:18,878 They just so boldly and confidently speak like the Bible is true, creation is true. 281 00:15:18,961 --> 00:15:20,880 We believe this. 282 00:15:21,339 --> 00:15:24,550 [Jen] A great example is this channel called Paul and Morgan. 283 00:15:24,634 --> 00:15:27,512 Guys, if you're new here, we're making Christian advice videos 284 00:15:27,595 --> 00:15:32,225 - on life, love, and dating. - Woo, woo, woo! 285 00:15:33,184 --> 00:15:38,898 - We met in a unconventional way. - For Christians, anyways. 286 00:15:38,981 --> 00:15:42,527 [Morgan laughs] We met on Tinder. 287 00:15:42,610 --> 00:15:45,530 ♪ Dah nah nah ♪ Breaking news. 288 00:15:45,613 --> 00:15:50,451 They're parroting these ideals of the older generation. 289 00:15:50,535 --> 00:15:54,789 One major area in which God began to really work in my heart 290 00:15:54,872 --> 00:16:00,169 was in the area of submission. My husband had asked me not to wear pants, 291 00:16:00,461 --> 00:16:03,381 and I was out from under his authority, again. 292 00:16:03,756 --> 00:16:06,968 They're very much passing it down, and making it cool and trendy. 293 00:16:07,051 --> 00:16:09,011 Same book, different cover. 294 00:16:09,262 --> 00:16:11,347 [male producer] What is the role of the wife? 295 00:16:11,431 --> 00:16:17,311 So the role of the wife is to submit to your husbands, 296 00:16:17,395 --> 00:16:21,566 - which ooh, scary word, "submit". - Very scary. 297 00:16:21,649 --> 00:16:23,609 It's a choice to submit. 298 00:16:24,152 --> 00:16:27,530 We do our YouTube channel, and share the word of God 299 00:16:27,613 --> 00:16:29,699 because if we can be a light 300 00:16:29,782 --> 00:16:33,995 even to one person out of a million, like, praise God. 301 00:16:34,078 --> 00:16:37,123 You can't be a they/them, people, you can't! 302 00:16:37,206 --> 00:16:39,417 I'm sorry, pick one or the other at least… 303 00:16:39,500 --> 00:16:42,003 [Kristin] Social media can take something fringe. 304 00:16:42,086 --> 00:16:45,339 Drag queens, it's so disgusting, it's so shocking. 305 00:16:45,423 --> 00:16:48,468 And move them into the center of our conversation. 306 00:16:48,551 --> 00:16:50,261 Some of you might go to hell 307 00:16:50,344 --> 00:16:53,264 to be tormented day and night for all of eternity. 308 00:16:53,347 --> 00:16:54,265 They're trying to present it as cool. 309 00:16:54,348 --> 00:16:57,894 My seven tips for how to speak femininely. 310 00:16:57,977 --> 00:17:01,272 I'll mainstream Christians posting the umbrella of authority. 311 00:17:01,355 --> 00:17:04,441 Treat your husband as the head of the household, and obey him. 312 00:17:04,525 --> 00:17:07,027 And I want to just grab them by the shoulders and say, 313 00:17:07,111 --> 00:17:09,362 no, that was made by a cult leader. 314 00:17:09,447 --> 00:17:12,158 Christian women should dress modestly. 315 00:17:12,241 --> 00:17:15,285 You wouldn't repost something by Charles Manson. Don't do this. 316 00:17:15,369 --> 00:17:17,037 God is trying to warn his children. 317 00:17:17,121 --> 00:17:18,915 Uh-uh, Satan, the Lord is my shepherd. 318 00:17:18,997 --> 00:17:20,458 God's word, of God's truth, of God's design. 319 00:17:20,541 --> 00:17:21,751 - Biblical morality. - [jumbled clamoring] 320 00:17:21,833 --> 00:17:23,960 That's where the devil gets you, alone in your room. 321 00:17:24,045 --> 00:17:25,670 [influencers clamoring] 322 00:17:25,755 --> 00:17:28,382 - [clamoring crescendos] - And that is the Joshua Generation. 323 00:17:29,967 --> 00:17:32,053 Today, it's my honor and privilege 324 00:17:32,136 --> 00:17:34,305 to join in this announcement of a guilty verdict 325 00:17:34,388 --> 00:17:37,016 in the case of United States versus Josh Duggar. 326 00:17:37,099 --> 00:17:40,102 No one is above the law, and that's what this case demonstrates. 327 00:17:41,145 --> 00:17:43,773 [Deanna] Amy called me on the phone about the verdict, 328 00:17:43,856 --> 00:17:49,403 and I said, well, Amy, justice has been served. 329 00:17:49,570 --> 00:17:51,030 [suspenseful music plays] 330 00:17:51,405 --> 00:17:56,035 [Bobye] I just felt like a flood of relief for the girls. 331 00:17:56,869 --> 00:18:01,499 Never having to say, I forgive you, you didn't do anything wrong, it's okay. 332 00:18:01,582 --> 00:18:06,712 Never having to face him knowing what he's done, and not be heard. 333 00:18:08,047 --> 00:18:13,094 And we just hugged. We just sat there, and hugged probably two or three minutes. 334 00:18:13,177 --> 00:18:16,138 - Yeah. - [music fades] 335 00:18:16,222 --> 00:18:19,767 'Cause it felt like it was gonna finally come to an end. 336 00:18:21,060 --> 00:18:23,312 [female reporter] Anything you wanna say, sir? 337 00:18:23,396 --> 00:18:25,398 [male reporter] Do you have any comments for today, sir? 338 00:18:25,481 --> 00:18:30,027 [Deanna] At this time, I have not spoken to my brother about any of this. 339 00:18:30,862 --> 00:18:33,990 He needs to apologize to a lot of people. 340 00:18:34,198 --> 00:18:35,491 [suspenseful music plays] 341 00:18:35,575 --> 00:18:38,661 [Jill] My dad does control a lot of things in the family. 342 00:18:38,744 --> 00:18:41,664 Family relationships were already kind of rocky. 343 00:18:41,747 --> 00:18:48,754 I reached out to TLC to ask for all contracts that I had been involved in. 344 00:18:50,423 --> 00:18:53,426 My parents had signed for a bunch of the kids 345 00:18:53,509 --> 00:18:57,430 who were no longer minors, including myself. 346 00:18:58,222 --> 00:19:00,808 I became an adult in 2009. 347 00:19:01,350 --> 00:19:04,937 As the kids aged to adulthood, they're still listed as minors, 348 00:19:05,021 --> 00:19:06,355 and nobody fixed that. 349 00:19:07,607 --> 00:19:13,029 Everything within the family dynamic has shifted, and not for the better. 350 00:19:13,112 --> 00:19:15,448 We're very much on the outside with the family. 351 00:19:15,531 --> 00:19:20,286 They don't talk to us, and so for us, we don't know what's going on. 352 00:19:20,369 --> 00:19:22,747 - We have no idea. - We typically find out what's going on… 353 00:19:22,872 --> 00:19:24,123 - Through the media. - …Through People Magazine. 354 00:19:24,206 --> 00:19:26,417 Through In Touch, through E!. 355 00:19:27,752 --> 00:19:31,923 [Bobye] I try to look back at the Jim Bob and Michelle that we loved. 356 00:19:32,757 --> 00:19:35,760 It was really hard, because it's just like you've lost your best friend. 357 00:19:37,345 --> 00:19:41,349 [Jill] It's gonna change our family. It already has completely. 358 00:19:42,099 --> 00:19:43,976 [music fades] 359 00:19:44,810 --> 00:19:49,148 I have a notebook full of IBLP rules. 360 00:19:49,565 --> 00:19:53,861 I took these notes in the living room with the other kids, my other cousins. 361 00:19:53,945 --> 00:19:56,864 - [Producer] Who sat you down? - Jim Bob, of course. 362 00:19:58,032 --> 00:20:00,493 Values to be a good wife. 363 00:20:00,576 --> 00:20:04,830 It says, "He is your leader, your husband is your leader." 364 00:20:04,914 --> 00:20:07,625 Would you have ever dreamed on your 20th birthday… 365 00:20:07,708 --> 00:20:11,879 [Amy continues] Loyalty can be demonstrated only in adversity. 366 00:20:12,630 --> 00:20:15,716 Think about that. Think about what that teaches. 367 00:20:17,259 --> 00:20:21,097 Teaches you that you have no way out, and no matter what they do, 368 00:20:21,180 --> 00:20:23,975 loyalty will shine through in adversity. 369 00:20:25,601 --> 00:20:26,852 How messed up is that? 370 00:20:27,937 --> 00:20:31,774 Be loyal to God, be loyal to your parents and that authority, 371 00:20:32,233 --> 00:20:36,654 and be willing to love your spouse even when it hurts. 372 00:20:37,738 --> 00:20:39,991 [male reporter] Do you have any comments, Anna? 373 00:20:40,074 --> 00:20:42,076 You think 12 years is fair, Anna? 374 00:20:42,159 --> 00:20:45,037 This comes up with Anna Duggar a lot. Why can't she just leave? 375 00:20:45,162 --> 00:20:47,665 Oh, just let's take a look at why she just can't leave. 376 00:20:47,748 --> 00:20:49,625 Okay, so she was raised without an education. 377 00:20:49,709 --> 00:20:52,003 She was chosen for Joshua Duggar. 378 00:20:52,086 --> 00:20:56,007 Her duty is to him, to be pleasing in every way, always, 379 00:20:56,090 --> 00:21:00,136 even if he's not there. She has a bevy of children with him. 380 00:21:00,344 --> 00:21:04,015 We all out here know that somebody like that would find resources. 381 00:21:04,098 --> 00:21:06,976 She'd have a book deal so fast, but she doesn't know that. 382 00:21:07,059 --> 00:21:09,061 She probably doesn't know the truth of her situation. 383 00:21:09,145 --> 00:21:11,814 Josh was my first love, he's my one and only. 384 00:21:11,897 --> 00:21:14,942 My only hope was to cling to my faith, 385 00:21:15,026 --> 00:21:18,237 because I think in the stun, and in the shock of everything, 386 00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:22,783 I was just praying, God help, help me to know how to respond to all of this. 387 00:21:23,325 --> 00:21:26,454 [Tia] Young, idealistic people can get tangled up in that stuff 388 00:21:26,537 --> 00:21:28,456 all of the time, as I know firsthand. 389 00:21:30,124 --> 00:21:33,419 [female recording] And in here is Tia doing dishes again. 390 00:21:33,794 --> 00:21:36,547 [Tia] In fundamentalism, suffering means holiness. 391 00:21:36,630 --> 00:21:40,509 So I was just tapping into that narrative of if you're too happy, something's wrong. 392 00:21:41,844 --> 00:21:46,390 In October of 2007, my husband followed me around the house for four hours 393 00:21:46,474 --> 00:21:49,393 with a length of firewood, promising to bludgeon me to death. 394 00:21:50,311 --> 00:21:52,480 Then outta the blue, he goes, "I'm outta here." 395 00:21:52,563 --> 00:21:55,316 And I heard a voice in my head that said, run right now. 396 00:21:55,399 --> 00:21:57,359 So I went and got the kids, and put them in the car, 397 00:21:57,443 --> 00:21:59,487 and he had gone back to his office to get his gun, 398 00:21:59,570 --> 00:22:02,740 and if I had stayed home, we would be dead. 399 00:22:03,699 --> 00:22:07,703 I escaped by the skin of my teeth, so I'm never gonna say it's easy. 400 00:22:10,331 --> 00:22:16,212 For me and a lot of other survivors, Josh's trial has given me a lot of hope. 401 00:22:16,295 --> 00:22:18,172 I hope for a reckoning. 402 00:22:18,255 --> 00:22:20,424 [tense music plays] 403 00:22:21,383 --> 00:22:25,763 A group of women come forward and sue IBLP, 404 00:22:25,846 --> 00:22:29,391 and then a little bit later on add Gothard into that lawsuit. 405 00:22:30,518 --> 00:22:36,524 The allegations are that Gothard sexually abused and harassed them. 406 00:22:36,607 --> 00:22:40,820 IBLP as an organization knew, and chose to look the other way. 407 00:22:42,863 --> 00:22:46,951 I was very aware of the lawsuit when it popped up against Bill Gothard. 408 00:22:47,034 --> 00:22:50,996 I was aware of it far before it became public, because I was asked 409 00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:56,544 to be a part of it, and I turned it down because I was petrified. 410 00:22:56,627 --> 00:22:59,630 At the time, I felt that I would be in danger. 411 00:23:00,256 --> 00:23:04,385 So, I joined the lawsuit as Jane Doe number three. 412 00:23:05,761 --> 00:23:09,557 When you join a lawsuit, it's constantly rehashing 413 00:23:09,640 --> 00:23:16,605 the most horrific memories of your life, and telling them again, and again. 414 00:23:16,689 --> 00:23:21,902 If you decide to move forward in a case it's also important that you realize 415 00:23:21,986 --> 00:23:25,656 the emotional toll that it's going to continue to take on you. 416 00:23:25,739 --> 00:23:28,367 Quite frankly, the cost was too high. 417 00:23:28,450 --> 00:23:31,412 One of our factors was statute of limitations. 418 00:23:31,495 --> 00:23:34,165 [dramatic music plays] 419 00:23:35,166 --> 00:23:37,793 [Emily] And the lawsuit was dismissed. 420 00:23:37,877 --> 00:23:39,879 I knew that the organization was big enough. 421 00:23:39,962 --> 00:23:44,175 I knew that they had a lot of money. I was just like, there is no way. 422 00:23:44,258 --> 00:23:47,094 I mean, it is literally a David and Goliath situation here. 423 00:23:47,887 --> 00:23:50,806 [Brooke] Gothard had a lot of money and resources, 424 00:23:50,890 --> 00:23:55,352 so he countersued some of the original plaintiffs. 425 00:23:55,436 --> 00:24:00,733 He was asking us to pay approximately 18,000 a piece. 426 00:24:01,901 --> 00:24:04,111 And now the plaintiffs were on the defense. 427 00:24:04,195 --> 00:24:06,197 [dramatic music crescendos] 428 00:24:06,697 --> 00:24:09,241 And my friend Amy and I heard they're going to have 429 00:24:09,325 --> 00:24:14,371 a hearing about this in Chicago. And so I tell Amy, we've gotta go. 430 00:24:14,455 --> 00:24:15,706 [energetic music plays] 431 00:24:15,873 --> 00:24:21,754 The victims feeling validated, and feeling heard was really the thing at stake here. 432 00:24:21,837 --> 00:24:27,885 To me, that's not even scratching the surface of what they're owed, 433 00:24:27,968 --> 00:24:30,554 and what all of us are owed. 434 00:24:30,638 --> 00:24:33,349 There were literally hundreds of thousands of children 435 00:24:33,432 --> 00:24:36,518 raised in this ATI program under these same teachings. 436 00:24:36,602 --> 00:24:39,772 John Cornish, one of the co-founders of Recovering Grace, 437 00:24:39,855 --> 00:24:46,904 gives me Bill Gothard's phone number, and so I decide, well, we are in Chicago. 438 00:24:46,987 --> 00:24:49,865 - Why don't we go over to his house? - [audience applauds] 439 00:24:49,949 --> 00:24:54,370 Bill Gothard kind of came to loom over my life, even as an adult. 440 00:24:54,453 --> 00:24:58,123 Bill Gothard used to speak to stadiums, you know, every week, 441 00:24:58,207 --> 00:25:00,334 and now he just sits alone in his house. 442 00:25:02,169 --> 00:25:04,421 This kind of Peter Pan-like character 443 00:25:04,505 --> 00:25:07,091 living in the home he's lived in in his entire life. 444 00:25:07,258 --> 00:25:09,093 [suspenseful music plays] 445 00:25:09,301 --> 00:25:15,641 He was waiting at the front door wearing a full suit, a tie. He had done his hair. 446 00:25:17,893 --> 00:25:21,272 His entire living room is covered in boxes, 447 00:25:21,355 --> 00:25:27,111 all copies of the 37 self-published books that he's written. 448 00:25:27,278 --> 00:25:28,904 [music intensifies] 449 00:25:29,029 --> 00:25:33,075 We sit down, and he says that he wants to pray for me. 450 00:25:33,158 --> 00:25:36,495 And so he looks at the floor, and closes his eyes, 451 00:25:36,578 --> 00:25:38,205 and I look at the floor and close my eyes, 452 00:25:38,289 --> 00:25:41,500 and then I realize, why am I pretending right now? 453 00:25:41,583 --> 00:25:47,464 So I opened my eyes and when I do, he's looking at me. 454 00:25:48,132 --> 00:25:49,925 His eyes are open. 455 00:25:50,009 --> 00:25:53,178 It was kind of like, you know, looking the devil in the eye. 456 00:25:54,513 --> 00:25:57,975 In that moment, everything made sense to me. 457 00:25:58,058 --> 00:25:59,810 [audience applauds] 458 00:25:59,893 --> 00:26:03,522 His word, his principles is what God accomplished here tonight. 459 00:26:03,605 --> 00:26:06,608 About wisdom. God's will, the love of the Lord. 460 00:26:06,692 --> 00:26:09,778 Pleasing for what you could do. 461 00:26:09,862 --> 00:26:13,324 - [audience applauds] - [eerie music crescendos] 462 00:26:13,407 --> 00:26:16,577 It was just a man the whole time. 463 00:26:16,660 --> 00:26:19,747 [gentle music] 464 00:26:19,872 --> 00:26:25,627 When I testified in court, in front of him, I locked eyes with Bill. 465 00:26:26,045 --> 00:26:31,258 I had taken my power back. I had taken my voice back. 466 00:26:32,384 --> 00:26:38,432 After a full day of testimony, the judge denied Gothard's sanctions. 467 00:26:38,515 --> 00:26:41,560 He found our testimony to be credible… 468 00:26:42,102 --> 00:26:44,938 …And we got to walk out of that courtroom victorious. 469 00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:48,650 - [Heather] Ma. - What? 470 00:26:48,734 --> 00:26:51,320 If you go on ATI's website, 471 00:26:51,403 --> 00:26:57,576 it says ATI was a homeschooling program from 1984 to 2021. 472 00:26:59,745 --> 00:27:03,248 As of now, ATI doesn't exist anymore, 473 00:27:03,332 --> 00:27:07,002 and they're just selling all of these wisdom booklets 474 00:27:07,086 --> 00:27:11,548 as a Bible study available to anyone who wants to buy it. 475 00:27:11,632 --> 00:27:17,429 Booklets that we were forced to use, they are now diminishing it to, you know, 476 00:27:17,513 --> 00:27:19,264 a goddamn Bible study. 477 00:27:19,348 --> 00:27:23,644 At face value, I take it as a victory because I think that they're scared. 478 00:27:23,727 --> 00:27:25,521 But IBLP still exists. 479 00:27:25,604 --> 00:27:29,942 This is the first I'm hearing about it, as are several of the ATI survivors. 480 00:27:30,025 --> 00:27:32,111 There's things that Bill Gothard stole from us 481 00:27:32,194 --> 00:27:34,863 that we could never get back, like our childhoods. 482 00:27:34,947 --> 00:27:37,324 And there's so many people who grew up 483 00:27:37,449 --> 00:27:41,870 in this educationally neglectful homeschool program, 484 00:27:41,954 --> 00:27:45,582 and now are struggling financially to get by. 485 00:27:45,666 --> 00:27:47,876 [suspenseful music plays] 486 00:27:48,043 --> 00:27:50,963 When you grow up in such a stringent belief system, 487 00:27:51,046 --> 00:27:54,800 I think that the natural impulse is just to rebel against it. 488 00:27:55,259 --> 00:27:59,471 I had been rejecting my upbringing for so long, 489 00:27:59,972 --> 00:28:04,518 I realized that I'd ended up kind of empty inside. 490 00:28:06,186 --> 00:28:12,985 I first read The Handmaid's Tale in college. I was like, oh this is my life. 491 00:28:14,361 --> 00:28:16,196 Around that time period, 492 00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:19,950 I was dealing with the power struggle with me and my father 493 00:28:20,033 --> 00:28:22,744 over, you know, whether or not he considered me 494 00:28:22,870 --> 00:28:26,081 to be an adult, or somebody totally under his authority. 495 00:28:26,165 --> 00:28:30,169 It really did create a sense of urgency in me 496 00:28:30,252 --> 00:28:34,089 to start trying to understand what the fuck I had been raised in. 497 00:28:37,926 --> 00:28:43,098 We got married in 2005, and in 2012 is when, you know, the curtain dropped. 498 00:28:43,682 --> 00:28:47,644 I ended up having a lot of health issues after having our son. 499 00:28:47,728 --> 00:28:51,273 All of this medical stuff was exploding. 500 00:28:51,982 --> 00:28:55,110 I'm having strokes, and sick, and then unbeknownst to me, 501 00:28:55,194 --> 00:28:58,780 - because I was in survival mode. - I gave up. 502 00:28:58,864 --> 00:29:01,950 I was checked out. I started drinking. 503 00:29:02,576 --> 00:29:08,582 And we separated. I was a single mom for a little bit, 504 00:29:08,665 --> 00:29:13,462 - and he had a lot of… - I had a lot of time to drink. 505 00:29:13,712 --> 00:29:15,714 [gentle music plays] 506 00:29:17,257 --> 00:29:22,471 In this cult, the whole fear of your kids ending up bad, 507 00:29:22,721 --> 00:29:25,557 or ending up doing drugs, ending up in jail, or whatever. 508 00:29:26,099 --> 00:29:28,352 I ended up in jail anyways. 509 00:29:30,229 --> 00:29:37,653 In my twenties, I started shoplifting, and I didn't know why I did it. 510 00:29:37,736 --> 00:29:41,740 I didn't need anything. I was in jail several times. 511 00:29:41,823 --> 00:29:43,659 One time, for about a week. 512 00:29:43,742 --> 00:29:46,537 I sought out an addiction recovery program. 513 00:29:46,620 --> 00:29:50,707 The first thing they had me do in their 12 step program 514 00:29:50,791 --> 00:29:56,421 was talk about and confront my childhood, which I had never done before. 515 00:29:56,505 --> 00:29:58,298 [emotional music plays] 516 00:29:58,382 --> 00:30:00,092 At one time at work, 517 00:30:00,175 --> 00:30:05,055 I just absolutely just had a overwhelming sense of panic. 518 00:30:05,138 --> 00:30:06,890 So I started going to a counselor. 519 00:30:06,974 --> 00:30:09,726 We spent about three whole sessions talking about, 520 00:30:09,851 --> 00:30:13,105 well, let's talk about your upbringing first. What was that like? 521 00:30:14,439 --> 00:30:17,192 She said, you're exhibiting a lot of the same symptoms 522 00:30:17,276 --> 00:30:21,113 that people who were raised in high controlling religious groups show. 523 00:30:21,196 --> 00:30:25,242 And she said, and honestly, you need to start considering reaching out 524 00:30:25,325 --> 00:30:28,287 beyond what you were taught, maybe going to other churches. 525 00:30:28,370 --> 00:30:31,582 Put your hand down if you decided to make your first TikTok video 526 00:30:31,665 --> 00:30:33,834 about how your parents joined a cult when you were 12… 527 00:30:33,917 --> 00:30:37,838 Deconstruction is deciding for yourself if the things you were taught 528 00:30:37,921 --> 00:30:41,925 is really the truth you believe in, and if it's not, what would it look like? 529 00:30:42,009 --> 00:30:43,677 Do you even believe in God? 530 00:30:43,760 --> 00:30:46,847 Hey, I'm Heather, and I was raised in this cult. 531 00:30:46,930 --> 00:30:49,683 Deconstructing is an exhausting process. 532 00:30:49,766 --> 00:30:53,145 All of this stuff that you believed just got turned upside down, 533 00:30:53,228 --> 00:30:55,856 and now your thinking is all new now. 534 00:30:55,939 --> 00:30:58,442 [tense music plays] 535 00:30:58,817 --> 00:31:02,571 [Brooke] Becoming the person that I wanted to be now is a big step 536 00:31:02,779 --> 00:31:04,948 in my a deconstruction. 537 00:31:05,032 --> 00:31:09,161 I put myself through college, and then a PhD program. 538 00:31:09,244 --> 00:31:14,249 I was like, ah, watch me. Watch how much education I can get. 539 00:31:14,333 --> 00:31:17,294 I have sinned against God, and I cannot save myself… 540 00:31:17,377 --> 00:31:19,671 I definitely have changed. 541 00:31:19,755 --> 00:31:23,258 [Jill] Jing is talking about how there was a lot of fear growing up. 542 00:31:23,342 --> 00:31:25,927 [Jinger] We followed a teacher named Bill Gothard. 543 00:31:26,011 --> 00:31:28,597 The show definitely influenced a lot of people 544 00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:32,142 to get into Bill Gothard's teaching with IBLP, 545 00:31:32,225 --> 00:31:34,978 and now this is a correction coming back and saying, 546 00:31:35,062 --> 00:31:37,314 don't follow these teachings, they're so harmful. 547 00:31:38,857 --> 00:31:43,362 [Amy] Watching Jill change to how she is now, it is night and day difference, 548 00:31:43,445 --> 00:31:47,574 and I'm just really, really, really proud of her. 549 00:31:47,658 --> 00:31:49,242 [Jill] If you were in ATI or IBLP, 550 00:31:49,326 --> 00:31:52,162 unfortunately, a lot of times you have to go through help 551 00:31:52,245 --> 00:31:55,332 because it's not until then that you would risk everything 552 00:31:55,415 --> 00:31:58,377 to like, get out of those situations. 553 00:31:59,169 --> 00:32:01,880 Eventually, you start making your own decisions. 554 00:32:01,963 --> 00:32:06,927 It's like the nose ring that I got, and it's piece by piece, little by little 555 00:32:07,010 --> 00:32:11,223 to like, do what you need to to survive. 556 00:32:11,723 --> 00:32:18,271 Speaking up is like the last step in kind of deconstructing the Gothard ideology. 557 00:32:18,772 --> 00:32:23,485 We've lived it. They made us live it, and we have some things to say. 558 00:32:24,903 --> 00:32:28,031 That little voice in the back of your head that says, this is wrong? 559 00:32:28,115 --> 00:32:30,033 That's right. Don't lose that. 560 00:32:31,159 --> 00:32:33,954 You are trustworthy, and you can believe yourself. 561 00:32:34,037 --> 00:32:36,790 No matter what, God actually loves you. 562 00:32:36,873 --> 00:32:40,252 To a young girl still trapped in that world, 563 00:32:40,335 --> 00:32:47,092 you don't have to own any of the shame that anyone tries to ascribe to you. 564 00:32:47,968 --> 00:32:52,597 I wake up sometimes thinking, this is my life. I made this. 565 00:32:52,681 --> 00:32:56,977 I made this for me, and no one told me I could or couldn't. 566 00:32:57,644 --> 00:32:58,645 Wow, guys. 567 00:32:59,855 --> 00:33:00,856 Sorry, that's heavy. 568 00:33:03,066 --> 00:33:04,985 Fuck. [exhales] 569 00:33:06,361 --> 00:33:08,613 It's weird, the things I thought I would cry about, I didn't. 570 00:33:08,697 --> 00:33:11,408 And the things that I thought'd be fine are hitting me. 571 00:33:11,867 --> 00:33:13,243 Anyway, okay. 572 00:33:14,202 --> 00:33:15,036 Sorry, guys. 573 00:33:15,245 --> 00:33:16,913 - [sniffles] - [intense music plays] 574 00:33:17,330 --> 00:33:22,335 When you leave, and you're actually out there flailing like a new little fish, 575 00:33:22,669 --> 00:33:25,422 Um…[struggles to speak] 576 00:33:28,508 --> 00:33:31,052 …There are people that catch you. The universe catches you. 577 00:33:33,638 --> 00:33:37,434 [Chad] Those of us who experienced the hurt and the abuse, 578 00:33:37,517 --> 00:33:42,522 watched as people celebrated it on TV, and didn't have our stories told. 579 00:33:42,606 --> 00:33:46,485 I believe strongly that victims should always be protected. 580 00:33:46,568 --> 00:33:48,570 Victims should always be cared for. 581 00:33:48,653 --> 00:33:51,239 You're out there, like your story's out there, 582 00:33:51,323 --> 00:33:54,910 so you just feel like I'd rather have some say in what that looks like. 583 00:33:55,911 --> 00:34:00,040 [Chad] We had this power the entire time over the people who were hurting us. 584 00:34:00,707 --> 00:34:04,461 It turns out, as much as they tried to control us, 585 00:34:04,544 --> 00:34:09,173 we were ultimately what they most feared, and all we had to do was talk. 586 00:34:11,218 --> 00:34:13,345 - So I decided I'd use my TikTok… - [talking over each other] 587 00:34:13,428 --> 00:34:14,596 Young Quiverfull mom… 588 00:34:14,679 --> 00:34:16,472 Grew up in the same cult that… 589 00:34:16,556 --> 00:34:18,474 And I was raised in this cult… 590 00:34:18,557 --> 00:34:22,686 just one of thousands and thousands and thousands… 591 00:34:22,938 --> 00:34:24,105 -[chatter and music crescendo] 592 00:34:26,608 --> 00:34:30,862 [gentle music continues through credits]