1
00:00:00,803 --> 00:00:04,603
The following programme contains
strong language and adult humour.

2
00:00:10,043 --> 00:00:12,123
I borrowed some money off
some naughty people.

3
00:00:12,163 --> 00:00:13,643
Gotta lie low for a bit.
It's nothing.

4
00:00:13,683 --> 00:00:15,483
We're gonna have to find
this brother of his.

5
00:00:15,523 --> 00:00:17,843
I don't have
many strong male friendships...

6
00:00:17,883 --> 00:00:19,603
But it feels like that's changing.

7
00:00:19,643 --> 00:00:22,003
Bye, love! See you later.
Dance class, yeah?

8
00:00:22,043 --> 00:00:24,883
Cause I've only lumped you half
my life savings for your wedding.

9
00:00:24,923 --> 00:00:28,283
I hope you're not gonna take my cash
and fuck off to Marbella, ey Lee?

10
00:00:28,323 --> 00:00:29,883
Do you not fancy me anymore?

11
00:00:29,923 --> 00:00:33,443
I think you might wanna talk
to Kirsty about her suspension.

12
00:00:33,483 --> 00:00:36,523
Do you ever feel like you're
the worst person in the world?

13
00:00:40,443 --> 00:00:42,843
Right, well, that's erm...
Yeah.

14
00:00:42,883 --> 00:00:45,123
Thanks for...
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

15
00:00:45,963 --> 00:00:47,803
Bye.
See you later.

16
00:00:47,843 --> 00:00:49,163
(UPBEAT MUSIC)

17
00:00:49,203 --> 00:00:52,123
# LA PANDILLA: Me Gustaria Ensenar
Al Mundo a Cantar #

18
00:01:14,763 --> 00:01:16,683
Hi love.
AH, FUCK!

19
00:01:19,163 --> 00:01:21,683
Erm, you're-
We closed early, so...

20
00:01:21,723 --> 00:01:23,082
Oh.

21
00:01:23,123 --> 00:01:24,883
Left your bag in the car.

22
00:01:24,923 --> 00:01:26,283
Lee?

23
00:01:27,963 --> 00:01:30,803
Erm, I er, er, he...

24
00:01:30,843 --> 00:01:32,483
Saw her. On the street.

25
00:01:32,522 --> 00:01:33,683
Yeah.

26
00:01:33,723 --> 00:01:35,843
Picked her up, dropped her off.
Right.

27
00:01:36,802 --> 00:01:39,603
Right. But, hang on-

28
00:01:39,643 --> 00:01:41,403
('STRICTLY COME DANCING'
MUSIC PLAYS)

29
00:01:41,443 --> 00:01:43,563
Buenasera mi amoressss!

30
00:01:43,603 --> 00:01:45,323
How we feeling up in here?!

31
00:01:45,363 --> 00:01:47,802
Scuse lateness!
She is run off her feet.

32
00:01:47,843 --> 00:01:50,043
This is my lunch, would you believe?

33
00:01:50,082 --> 00:01:52,522
Right, are we ready?!

34
00:01:52,563 --> 00:01:57,483
Midweek warmup in 5,6,7,8 and...

35
00:01:58,563 --> 00:02:00,083
Are we staying sir?

36
00:02:00,123 --> 00:02:02,363
They need to get used to
an audience.

37
00:02:02,403 --> 00:02:04,483
Show a bit of support! Come on!

38
00:02:04,523 --> 00:02:07,043
You know you want to!

39
00:02:07,083 --> 00:02:11,243
Great! Now positive vibes only
inside the space is all I ask.

40
00:02:11,283 --> 00:02:13,363
Also £2 donation for spectators.

41
00:02:13,403 --> 00:02:15,043
Pop it in the tub.

42
00:02:15,083 --> 00:02:17,523
6, 7, 8 and come on...

43
00:02:17,563 --> 00:02:20,203
(SALSA MUSIC)

44
00:02:20,243 --> 00:02:22,683
Ooh and move your hips!

45
00:02:24,003 --> 00:02:26,323
Bitch! Why are you
screening my calls?

46
00:02:26,363 --> 00:02:28,243
What if I was on fire
or some shit?

47
00:02:29,403 --> 00:02:30,723
Anyway, listen...

48
00:02:30,763 --> 00:02:33,323
Y'know you said 'Don't tell anyone
about your brother' yeah?

49
00:02:33,363 --> 00:02:35,043
Well, see, thing is...
(MAN TUTTS)

50
00:02:35,083 --> 00:02:37,523
Don't 'tut' me, sweat patch!

51
00:02:37,563 --> 00:02:40,323
Get some deodorant,
have some self-respect!

52
00:02:40,363 --> 00:02:42,122
Stinky prick!

53
00:02:45,323 --> 00:02:47,163
So, there was this bloke, right...

54
00:02:48,683 --> 00:02:51,163
So... How was work?

55
00:02:52,003 --> 00:02:53,803
Oh, yeah, y'know, just usual.

56
00:02:55,683 --> 00:02:58,603
And here we go! And...

57
00:02:58,643 --> 00:03:00,043
Ladies and gentlemen,

58
00:03:00,083 --> 00:03:01,923
please, welcome to the floor,

59
00:03:01,963 --> 00:03:05,523
the new Mr and Mrs Campbell with...
The Lambada!

60
00:03:05,563 --> 00:03:07,803
# GUNS N' ROSES:
Sweet Child O' Mine #

61
00:03:07,843 --> 00:03:10,763
Love it! Yes, yes.

62
00:03:10,803 --> 00:03:12,523
Lead, Glen!

63
00:03:12,563 --> 00:03:14,803
Come on! From the hips! The hips!

64
00:03:17,323 --> 00:03:19,603
Thing about the lambada, see?
Dominance.

65
00:03:19,643 --> 00:03:22,483
Right, if he can't lead, I'm sorry,
the whole thing goes to-

66
00:03:22,523 --> 00:03:23,763
ARGH!!
OH MY GOD!!

67
00:03:23,803 --> 00:03:24,923
Ah, shit.

68
00:03:24,963 --> 00:03:28,003
I think I-I've scratched...
I've scratched the cornea.Glen!

69
00:03:28,043 --> 00:03:30,443
Just pull it away!
Be careful, be careful! Be careful!

70
00:03:30,483 --> 00:03:32,323
There. You're free.
Argh!

71
00:03:32,363 --> 00:03:35,923
I've, I've, I've got some erm,
eyedrops in my bag...

72
00:03:35,963 --> 00:03:37,763
Very brittle hair, haven't ya?

73
00:03:37,803 --> 00:03:39,523
You wanna sort that, darling?

74
00:03:39,563 --> 00:03:41,843
It's your iron, love,
you're deficient.

75
00:03:41,883 --> 00:03:44,283
I'll just, er, won't be a sec...

76
00:03:47,363 --> 00:03:50,803
Not so fast, Mr Spectator!
Let's see what you got, ey?

77
00:03:50,843 --> 00:03:52,403
Oh, no, let's not.

78
00:03:52,443 --> 00:03:55,523
I won't expect footwork, just wheel
her about while she runs the choreo!

79
00:03:55,563 --> 00:03:56,963
No.
No, you're alright.

80
00:03:57,003 --> 00:04:00,043
I won't take no for an answer!
You might have to, my darling.

81
00:04:00,083 --> 00:04:03,523
Ah! He's not got what it takes
for Latin. Heavy tread, y'see?

82
00:04:06,003 --> 00:04:08,123
You fucking what?
No, no! It's fine.

83
00:04:08,163 --> 00:04:10,963
I can't expect you
to be able to lead.I'm able.

84
00:04:12,403 --> 00:04:16,243
Canning Town Break Dance Champion
1999.

85
00:04:17,723 --> 00:04:19,603
That shit stays with you.

86
00:04:19,643 --> 00:04:21,882
I mean, I don't think you should-
Come here, now!

87
00:04:21,923 --> 00:04:24,283
5, 6, 7, 8, let's go!

88
00:04:24,323 --> 00:04:26,123
(MUSIC CONTINUES)
Love it!

89
00:04:26,163 --> 00:04:27,643
Ooh, hello!

90
00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:33,323
Oh. It's great to have someone
finally lead, eh?!

91
00:04:33,363 --> 00:04:37,483
AYSHA:
I just thought you should know,
man's a proper dodgy geezer, innit.

92
00:04:41,123 --> 00:04:43,003
(MUSIC CONTINUES)

93
00:04:43,043 --> 00:04:44,523
6, 7, 8...

94
00:04:49,483 --> 00:04:51,283
Stealing my lady, is it?

95
00:04:52,603 --> 00:04:54,403
Right, well... I'm going.

96
00:04:54,443 --> 00:04:56,083
If I can make it.

97
00:04:56,123 --> 00:04:58,403
What with me heavy treads.

98
00:04:58,443 --> 00:05:00,643
Lee, Lee, mate, wait erm...

99
00:05:01,923 --> 00:05:04,323
Glen, you need to go and dance
with your fiancee.

100
00:05:08,363 --> 00:05:09,723
Oh, Lee!

101
00:05:09,763 --> 00:05:11,883
Er, listen, weird question but

102
00:05:11,923 --> 00:05:14,003
you don't know
any scary Irish blokes, do you?

103
00:05:14,043 --> 00:05:16,603
Something about
a rabbit tattoo or...

104
00:05:16,643 --> 00:05:19,243
(HIGH-PITCHED RINGING)
What?

105
00:05:19,283 --> 00:05:21,003
Oh, no, forget it.

106
00:05:21,043 --> 00:05:24,003
No, it's just Aysha at work
being weird. See you later.

107
00:05:26,163 --> 00:05:29,883
Ok, let's go! And 5, 6, 7, 8...

108
00:05:37,243 --> 00:05:42,603
# JOHNNY HALLYDAY:
Noir C'est Noir #

109
00:06:02,083 --> 00:06:04,403
Oh, couldn't sleep?

110
00:06:06,323 --> 00:06:08,363
Nah.
No, me neither.

111
00:06:08,403 --> 00:06:10,123
I've just been doing a deep clean.

112
00:06:10,163 --> 00:06:11,963
I just do it with the lights off,

113
00:06:12,003 --> 00:06:14,763
it's just a bit more sort of...
mindful.

114
00:06:17,243 --> 00:06:18,883
Erm... listen, Lee.

115
00:06:18,923 --> 00:06:21,963
I was just thinking that, erm...

116
00:06:22,683 --> 00:06:26,243
maybe, you could find erm...

117
00:06:26,283 --> 00:06:28,043
find somewhere else to stay.

118
00:06:29,363 --> 00:06:30,483
Oh.

119
00:06:31,483 --> 00:06:33,283
Because everything was fine...

120
00:06:34,403 --> 00:06:36,323
..like, we were fine.

121
00:06:36,363 --> 00:06:38,603
And now, I dunno-

122
00:06:38,643 --> 00:06:40,202
Yeah. Alright.

123
00:06:41,363 --> 00:06:42,683
What?

124
00:06:43,523 --> 00:06:44,843
Nothing.

125
00:06:46,483 --> 00:06:47,723
I'll go.

126
00:06:48,363 --> 00:06:50,003
Right.
Right.

127
00:06:53,403 --> 00:06:55,483
Oh god, oh no...

128
00:06:55,523 --> 00:06:58,043
Ohhhhh...
Yeah, yeah.

129
00:06:58,083 --> 00:06:59,643
I'm so sorry.

130
00:06:59,683 --> 00:07:02,603
It's just the boys, they hang
a little bit lower nowadays-

131
00:07:02,643 --> 00:07:04,723
Yes, no, I can see that. Yeah...

132
00:07:05,923 --> 00:07:08,203
Anyway, shut the fridge, Kirst.
Save the planet.

133
00:07:09,123 --> 00:07:11,683
I think I'm just gonna go
and get some sleep.

134
00:07:11,723 --> 00:07:13,643
Night, night.
Yeah. Night, night.

135
00:07:35,483 --> 00:07:37,603
Busy day at work today,
do you reckon, love?

136
00:07:37,643 --> 00:07:39,443
Yeah. I've got loads on.

137
00:07:42,163 --> 00:07:43,763
I know, love...

138
00:07:43,803 --> 00:07:45,403
about your job...

139
00:07:46,803 --> 00:07:48,563
And to be honest, love, I'm a...

140
00:07:50,283 --> 00:07:51,963
..I'm a bit scared...

141
00:07:53,323 --> 00:07:55,563
Cause like... you know,

142
00:07:55,603 --> 00:07:58,003
you're always telling me about work,
about your day,

143
00:07:58,043 --> 00:08:00,443
about how Liz from Accounts
has had a blonde bob done

144
00:08:00,483 --> 00:08:02,483
and how she looks
the spit of He-man.

145
00:08:03,123 --> 00:08:04,603
And you know...

146
00:08:05,683 --> 00:08:08,003
..if you can lie to me
about all that then...

147
00:08:09,723 --> 00:08:12,123
what else might you be
lying about, y'know?

148
00:08:14,963 --> 00:08:16,843
What?
(TOOTHBRUSH BUZZES)

149
00:08:17,923 --> 00:08:19,763
What? What is it?

150
00:08:22,403 --> 00:08:24,283
I know, Kirst.

151
00:08:24,323 --> 00:08:25,883
I found out.

152
00:08:27,883 --> 00:08:30,043
I'm so sorry.
I don't know how it happened.

153
00:08:30,083 --> 00:08:32,643
I know that's your brother,
it's just... (GARBLED SPEECH)

154
00:08:32,683 --> 00:08:35,602
You'll have to spit that out love,
I can't tell a word you're saying.

155
00:08:35,643 --> 00:08:38,003
Listen, I'll go downstairs,
I'll put the kettle on.

156
00:08:38,043 --> 00:08:40,643
And then,
I need you to tell me everything.

157
00:08:40,683 --> 00:08:42,403
Ok.
Alright.

158
00:08:42,443 --> 00:08:44,643
Like why they suspended
you in the first place.

159
00:08:45,883 --> 00:08:48,203
# LESLEY GORE: You Don't Own Me #

160
00:08:55,563 --> 00:08:57,683
Fuckin hell.
Do you think it's a lot?

161
00:08:57,723 --> 00:08:59,083
I mean...

162
00:09:00,203 --> 00:09:02,443
Fuckin hell. What are these?

163
00:09:02,483 --> 00:09:03,923
Er, Homewares.

164
00:09:03,963 --> 00:09:05,883
Yeah,
and I had a bit of a B&Q phase,

165
00:09:05,923 --> 00:09:08,683
so I've got quite a lot of
these extendable magnetic pens.

166
00:09:08,723 --> 00:09:11,483
They're, like, for getting things
down the back of radiators.

167
00:09:11,523 --> 00:09:15,083
Like, look, oh... Spare keys!

168
00:09:16,003 --> 00:09:18,203
So...
What about these?

169
00:09:18,243 --> 00:09:21,243
Body jewels. Yeah,
I don't know what that was about.

170
00:09:22,443 --> 00:09:24,803
And the printer cartridges...

171
00:09:26,163 --> 00:09:27,883
..that's why I was suspended.

172
00:09:27,923 --> 00:09:30,443
Kirst, there's loads of 'em.
Yeah, 28.

173
00:09:30,483 --> 00:09:32,043
We don't have a printer.

174
00:09:32,083 --> 00:09:33,723
(SIGHS) No, it's not...

175
00:09:35,443 --> 00:09:37,163
It's just like...

176
00:09:38,643 --> 00:09:40,123
doing it.

177
00:09:40,843 --> 00:09:42,803
It makes me feel...

178
00:09:45,243 --> 00:09:46,923
I don't know, like...

179
00:09:48,403 --> 00:09:49,643
..special.

180
00:09:52,363 --> 00:09:53,523
Alright?

181
00:09:55,723 --> 00:09:57,403
You're not at work?

182
00:09:57,443 --> 00:09:59,763
She's told me, Lee.
Everything. Haven't you?

183
00:09:59,803 --> 00:10:02,003
Well...
What? About the-

184
00:10:02,043 --> 00:10:05,243
He knows that I've been suspended
and I've been stealing from work.

185
00:10:05,283 --> 00:10:08,123
Yeah.
Where've you been?

186
00:10:08,883 --> 00:10:10,243
Run.

187
00:10:10,283 --> 00:10:11,923
Run?
Yes.

188
00:10:13,243 --> 00:10:15,443
You alright?
Yeah, I'm alright, yeah. You?

189
00:10:15,483 --> 00:10:17,483
I'm alright, yeah.
You alright?

190
00:10:17,523 --> 00:10:19,243
Gonna put the kettle on.

191
00:10:23,963 --> 00:10:26,283
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)

192
00:10:38,363 --> 00:10:41,723
(SULTRY FRENCH MUSIC)

193
00:10:55,763 --> 00:10:57,483
I'm so stupid.

194
00:10:58,243 --> 00:11:00,003
I was doing so well.

195
00:11:00,043 --> 00:11:01,603
I'm basically a paralegal.

196
00:11:01,643 --> 00:11:04,683
I do more work than
half the solicitors there and now...

197
00:11:05,243 --> 00:11:07,843
Oh, yeah, that's
a Knight of the Round Table...

198
00:11:09,403 --> 00:11:11,643
Oh, I don't know why. I don't know.

199
00:11:14,163 --> 00:11:15,883
I'm sorry, I'm such a freak.

200
00:11:15,923 --> 00:11:18,363
You're not. You're not, Kirst.
Don't say that.

201
00:11:18,403 --> 00:11:20,243
You know you've got a... what is it?

202
00:11:20,283 --> 00:11:21,923
A mental health thingy.

203
00:11:21,963 --> 00:11:24,123
Probably cause your mum's
a psychopath, to be honest.

204
00:11:24,163 --> 00:11:27,203
And a-actually,
they shouldn't be firing you

205
00:11:27,243 --> 00:11:29,643
for an actual... manageable...

206
00:11:32,283 --> 00:11:33,403
What?

207
00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:35,003
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)

208
00:11:35,043 --> 00:11:38,643
Kirsty. Get your fucking shoes on.

209
00:11:40,688 --> 00:11:43,283
Aysha, I need you to hold the fort.
I'll be about an hour.

210
00:11:43,323 --> 00:11:46,283
This is jokes, man.
I'm on my own here.

211
00:11:46,323 --> 00:11:48,363
I don't know how them tills work!

212
00:11:48,403 --> 00:11:50,003
Maybe now would be a good time to-

213
00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:51,763
how d'you not know
how the tills works?

214
00:11:51,803 --> 00:11:53,323
Glen!
Er, I gotta go. Sorry.

215
00:11:53,363 --> 00:11:55,883
I can't slow down.
If I slow down, I won't do it.

216
00:11:55,923 --> 00:11:57,523
Lip balm!
Alright, here...

217
00:11:57,563 --> 00:11:59,763
I'm so dry.
You're making me nervous.

218
00:11:59,803 --> 00:12:02,283
This is what Deborah Meaden
feels like every single day.

219
00:12:02,323 --> 00:12:05,043
It's so stressful.
I fucking love it!

220
00:12:08,563 --> 00:12:10,123
Come on!

221
00:12:19,483 --> 00:12:21,883
(PHONE BUZZES)

222
00:12:39,523 --> 00:12:41,203
Oh, fuck off.

223
00:12:41,243 --> 00:12:42,723
(DOOR SLAMS)

224
00:12:45,483 --> 00:12:48,523
(HIGH-PITCHED RINGING)

225
00:12:51,123 --> 00:12:53,763
Are they expecting you?
They're not, Becky, no.

226
00:12:53,803 --> 00:12:55,923
Well that shouldn't still work,
should it?

227
00:12:55,963 --> 00:12:57,683
I need to sign you in-
No, he's with me!

228
00:12:57,723 --> 00:12:59,243
No. He needs a lanyard.

229
00:12:59,283 --> 00:13:01,883
Just push through, just push
through it, push through!

230
00:13:01,923 --> 00:13:04,883
Look don't you dare call security,
Becky! don't you dare!

231
00:13:04,923 --> 00:13:06,923
Daryl?! Daryl, I might need you!

232
00:13:25,203 --> 00:13:26,883
Let's have it, you cunt!

233
00:13:30,963 --> 00:13:33,483
(GRUNTS)
Who the fuck are you?

234
00:13:33,523 --> 00:13:37,043
Jesus Christ!No, he's a skinny bloke
in a loincloth, now who are ya?

235
00:13:37,083 --> 00:13:39,563
Alright, alright, alright,
I'm Lee. I'm Glen's brother!

236
00:13:39,603 --> 00:13:41,683
Why didn't you say then,
you dickhead?

237
00:13:41,723 --> 00:13:43,203
What did you hit me with?!

238
00:13:43,243 --> 00:13:45,163
Oh, it's a chicken, innit.

239
00:13:45,203 --> 00:13:47,083
Who the fuck are you?

240
00:13:47,123 --> 00:13:48,963
Ay! Sue. Pleasure.

241
00:13:49,003 --> 00:13:50,523
And if anyone asks,

242
00:13:50,563 --> 00:13:53,643
they gave me a key so's I can
come and go as I please, alright?

243
00:13:53,683 --> 00:13:55,083
Yeah, whatever.

244
00:13:55,123 --> 00:13:57,243
I've gotta go.

245
00:13:58,723 --> 00:14:00,283
Fuck! The bag!

246
00:14:02,843 --> 00:14:05,843
Oh my God, I'm shaking.
I can feel my arse vibrate.

247
00:14:05,883 --> 00:14:08,763
You got my cue cards?
There's nothing on them, love.

248
00:14:08,803 --> 00:14:11,163
Yeah, I know, they're just
a power prop, aren't they?

249
00:14:11,203 --> 00:14:12,803
Get with it!

250
00:14:12,843 --> 00:14:14,363
(LIFT PINGS)
Door opening.

251
00:14:16,723 --> 00:14:18,363
Sorry.

252
00:14:19,843 --> 00:14:22,003
(PHONE RINGS)

253
00:14:22,043 --> 00:14:24,683
Sue! Don't answer the phone!

254
00:14:24,723 --> 00:14:27,443
(PHONE RINGS)
Do not answer that fucking-

255
00:14:27,483 --> 00:14:28,683
Hello?

256
00:14:28,723 --> 00:14:31,443
Glen? No, he's at work
at the moment, what's it about?

257
00:14:31,483 --> 00:14:34,483
Oh, the other Mister Campbell?
Yeah... You must mean Lee!

258
00:14:40,683 --> 00:14:41,803
Fuck!

259
00:14:41,843 --> 00:14:45,723
Mark Raynor. He's the one that
gave me the suspension.

260
00:14:45,763 --> 00:14:47,643
Smirk on his face when he did it.

261
00:14:48,643 --> 00:14:50,883
Well, I am gonna march
into his office.

262
00:14:50,923 --> 00:14:53,763
And I am gonna say,
"Mark, you...

263
00:14:54,963 --> 00:14:56,643
"..are a turd!"

264
00:14:56,683 --> 00:14:58,563
Not sure that'll get your job back,
love.

265
00:14:58,603 --> 00:15:00,243
I'm just pumping myself up,
aren't I?

266
00:15:00,283 --> 00:15:02,083
Glen! Work with me here. OK!

267
00:15:02,123 --> 00:15:04,363
I'm gonna go in there
and I'm gonna say,

268
00:15:04,403 --> 00:15:07,923
"Mark, you thought
you could push me out."

269
00:15:08,683 --> 00:15:11,323
"And you thought
you were better than me."

270
00:15:11,363 --> 00:15:15,323
"But the truth is Mark,
you are a worm."

271
00:15:15,363 --> 00:15:21,243
"You are a tiny little worm boy
underneath my shoe Mark and I..."

272
00:15:21,283 --> 00:15:23,243
What? What is wrong with you?

273
00:15:24,803 --> 00:15:26,363
I erm...

274
00:15:33,643 --> 00:15:35,723
I'll take the next one.

275
00:15:39,243 --> 00:15:43,523
I suppose, if we're being honest,
I em...

276
00:15:43,563 --> 00:15:46,763
I think I quite like it when you
talk to me like Mark from HR.

277
00:15:49,683 --> 00:15:51,323
Change of plan.

278
00:15:51,363 --> 00:15:54,803
You're reimbursing 'em for this one,
mate. That one's not on me.

279
00:15:55,443 --> 00:15:56,963
Car keys.
You off?

280
00:15:57,843 --> 00:16:00,043
Where you going?
I could do with a lift into town.

281
00:16:00,083 --> 00:16:01,843
Opposite direction!

282
00:16:01,883 --> 00:16:04,803
A12, is it? Cause I've got some
business that way too!

283
00:16:06,363 --> 00:16:08,603
What did I do with them?

284
00:16:08,643 --> 00:16:10,603
You looking for these?

285
00:16:10,643 --> 00:16:12,323
What's the magic word?

286
00:16:12,363 --> 00:16:15,203
Don't you fucking try me, girl.

287
00:16:15,243 --> 00:16:16,883
Charming!

288
00:16:16,923 --> 00:16:19,523
At least drop me at the precinct.
You gotta go that way!

289
00:16:19,563 --> 00:16:21,163
Oh! S... sorry.

290
00:16:21,203 --> 00:16:23,163
What the fuck do you want?

291
00:16:23,203 --> 00:16:25,163
There's something I need to say.

292
00:16:25,203 --> 00:16:27,323
It's rather pressing
so I've written it down.

293
00:16:27,363 --> 00:16:30,123
I have the cards here-
Move your fucking car!

294
00:16:30,163 --> 00:16:33,083
Yes, well, I-I- if I could
just r-read this first-

295
00:16:33,123 --> 00:16:34,203
Lee!

296
00:16:34,243 --> 00:16:37,643
(CAR STALLS)
Although it's been but a few days

297
00:16:37,683 --> 00:16:39,443
from the moment we met-

298
00:16:39,483 --> 00:16:41,483
(ENGINE ROARS)
Oh fuck!

299
00:16:41,523 --> 00:16:43,323
(UPBEAT MUSIC)

300
00:16:48,443 --> 00:16:49,763
Fuck!

301
00:16:54,403 --> 00:16:56,083
Get out!

302
00:16:56,123 --> 00:16:58,523
What do you think you're doing?
PERVERT!

303
00:16:58,563 --> 00:17:02,123
Sorry, but as I say
this is rather pressing.

304
00:17:04,243 --> 00:17:05,923
FUCKING HELL!!!

305
00:17:13,162 --> 00:17:14,402
Oops.

306
00:17:14,443 --> 00:17:16,162
I dropped my ring binder.

307
00:17:17,563 --> 00:17:19,283
That's a... lever arch file-

308
00:17:19,323 --> 00:17:20,563
Shhhh...

309
00:17:21,122 --> 00:17:22,243
Fetch.

310
00:17:35,403 --> 00:17:38,083
I didn't tell you to stand. Did I?

311
00:17:38,123 --> 00:17:40,803
Don't make me cross,

312
00:17:40,843 --> 00:17:42,723
you little...

313
00:17:42,763 --> 00:17:43,963
twat.

314
00:17:44,003 --> 00:17:45,563
Sorry, sorry, is that not...?

315
00:17:45,603 --> 00:17:47,483
Sorry, sorry...

316
00:17:49,963 --> 00:17:52,523
Erm, you... pathetic little man.

317
00:17:53,363 --> 00:17:55,083
You've come in handy, you have.

318
00:17:55,123 --> 00:17:57,363
I'm up and down the A12 like
a blue-arsed fly.

319
00:17:57,403 --> 00:18:00,683
'Mother of the bride'. I've got
a list of jobs as long as my tits.

320
00:18:00,723 --> 00:18:03,243
I'm DJing the wedding.
Gotta try out some kit.

321
00:18:03,283 --> 00:18:04,843
Take a left here.

322
00:18:04,883 --> 00:18:06,443
Who are you then?

323
00:18:06,483 --> 00:18:10,883
I'm Lee's friend and Glen's boss,
but mostly Lee's friend.

324
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:13,283
Ooh, nice when blokes have friends,
innit.

325
00:18:13,323 --> 00:18:15,123
Like Michael Ball and Alfie Boe.

326
00:18:18,363 --> 00:18:20,003
Thanks, Paul!

327
00:18:24,963 --> 00:18:26,843
(BOTH GROAN)

328
00:18:30,323 --> 00:18:33,203
Hello Jen. Looking for something?

329
00:18:33,243 --> 00:18:35,323
Oh my god.

330
00:18:35,363 --> 00:18:37,443
Mm. Disgusting, isn't he?

331
00:18:37,483 --> 00:18:39,203
(GROANS)

332
00:18:39,243 --> 00:18:40,963
(PHOTOCOPIER WHIRS)

333
00:18:42,883 --> 00:18:44,523
Right, we're here.

334
00:18:46,203 --> 00:18:47,603
Get out now.

335
00:18:47,643 --> 00:18:49,283
Alright!

336
00:18:50,563 --> 00:18:52,243
Lively darling, yeah!

337
00:18:55,843 --> 00:18:57,203
Ta-tah!

338
00:18:57,243 --> 00:18:59,203
I want you out n'all.
But I haven't-

339
00:18:59,243 --> 00:19:02,043
Maybe another time, yeah?
I... I'll just spin through it.

340
00:19:02,083 --> 00:19:05,923
Dear Lee,
though it's been but a few days

341
00:19:05,963 --> 00:19:08,083
from the moment we met...

342
00:19:08,123 --> 00:19:09,643
I felt-

343
00:19:09,683 --> 00:19:13,483
I felt an overwhelming
sense of peace...

344
00:19:15,603 --> 00:19:17,723
A P-peace the likes of which
never...

345
00:19:18,963 --> 00:19:21,483
No, no, no!

346
00:19:23,603 --> 00:19:25,923
She's got m'fucking bag!

347
00:19:27,123 --> 00:19:29,243
FUCK!

348
00:19:29,283 --> 00:19:30,523
Keep moving.

349
00:19:30,563 --> 00:19:32,963
Oh, piss off, Daryl.
Your jumper's inside out.

350
00:19:34,123 --> 00:19:36,403
D'you know what, Glen,
I've been thinking actually...

351
00:19:36,443 --> 00:19:37,963
fuck this place.

352
00:19:38,003 --> 00:19:40,723
I can get another job, easy.
Maybe even a full paralegal.

353
00:19:40,763 --> 00:19:43,443
Oh my god.
Kirsty, I didn't even tell you.

354
00:19:44,283 --> 00:19:45,963
I got the promotion!

355
00:19:46,003 --> 00:19:47,603
What?!
I-I got it, yeah!

356
00:19:47,643 --> 00:19:49,523
I know, since everything happened,
I didn't-

357
00:19:49,563 --> 00:19:50,763
(CHEERS)

358
00:19:52,443 --> 00:19:54,323
Bye, twats!

359
00:19:55,443 --> 00:19:58,803
(SALSA MUSIC)

360
00:20:08,843 --> 00:20:11,723
Where's your manager?
Tell him I want a test drive.

361
00:20:11,763 --> 00:20:14,003
He's on lunch, I can't really do-

362
00:20:14,043 --> 00:20:17,123
Look, son, I might be dropping
a grand on these decks,

363
00:20:17,163 --> 00:20:18,803
a tuna baguette can wait.

364
00:20:18,843 --> 00:20:24,883
Keats himself wrote, 'Truth is
beauty and beauty is truth'.

365
00:20:24,923 --> 00:20:28,643
Well, who am I
to scorn such words...

366
00:20:28,683 --> 00:20:30,883
Here. I've brought my own USB, mate.

367
00:20:30,923 --> 00:20:33,843
There's a few tracks
I wanna try out, alright.

368
00:20:33,883 --> 00:20:35,883
Oi Topknot! Hit the lights!

369
00:20:38,123 --> 00:20:40,123
SUE! YOU'VE GOT THE WRONG BAG-

370
00:20:40,163 --> 00:20:43,483
(FEEDBACK SCREECHES)

371
00:20:43,523 --> 00:20:46,043
(THROUGH PA):
One, two. One, two.

372
00:20:46,083 --> 00:20:48,083
# GUNS N' ROSES:
Sweet Child O' Mine #

373
00:20:48,123 --> 00:20:49,563
Ladies and Gentlemen,

374
00:20:49,603 --> 00:20:52,163
the bride and groom...

375
00:20:52,203 --> 00:20:55,163
Kirsty and Glen,
this is your big day!

376
00:20:55,203 --> 00:20:57,163
(AIRHORN SFX BLASTS)

377
00:20:57,203 --> 00:21:00,083
Everything you've worked
and saved so bloody hard for...

378
00:21:00,123 --> 00:21:02,723
Lee, I've been living a lie.

379
00:21:03,643 --> 00:21:05,843
Running from the truth.

380
00:21:05,883 --> 00:21:08,923
But now I see myself
for who I really am.

381
00:21:08,963 --> 00:21:11,803
Cause that's
what it's all about... Family.

382
00:21:11,843 --> 00:21:14,883
And now I think I see a way through,

383
00:21:14,923 --> 00:21:16,803
a way to put things right...

384
00:21:16,843 --> 00:21:19,563
And family looks out
for each other. Always.

385
00:21:19,603 --> 00:21:22,203
(HIGH-PITCHED RINGING)
I felt something Lee...

386
00:21:22,243 --> 00:21:24,323
something new and maybe...

387
00:21:24,363 --> 00:21:25,883
Just maybe...

388
00:21:30,443 --> 00:21:32,243
..you've felt it too.

389
00:21:32,283 --> 00:21:34,003
Oh...

390
00:21:34,043 --> 00:21:36,003
Now, get this one down ya!

391
00:21:36,043 --> 00:21:37,483
(DANCE MUSIC)

392
00:21:41,403 --> 00:21:43,203
Right, Glen, we are celebrating.

393
00:21:43,243 --> 00:21:45,883
Yeah.
Yeah! First up, I wanna go Trish's-

394
00:21:45,923 --> 00:21:48,243
You wanna go Trish's?Yeah.
Yeah, we can go Trish's.

395
00:21:48,283 --> 00:21:50,723
And then cocktails,
like, fancy ones.

396
00:21:50,763 --> 00:21:52,963
Yeah? That's not gonna
break the bank, is it?

397
00:21:53,003 --> 00:21:54,563
Go on, check the savings account.

398
00:21:54,603 --> 00:21:57,203
Alright, one moment, caller.
Drum roll, please.

399
00:21:57,243 --> 00:21:59,603
Oh, my god. This is it!

400
00:21:59,643 --> 00:22:03,243
Yeah, I think everything's falling
into place for us, Glen.

401
00:22:03,283 --> 00:22:06,003
And do you know what, actually,
from here on in,

402
00:22:06,043 --> 00:22:08,483
I think everything
is going to be absolutely...

403
00:22:09,843 --> 00:22:11,363
What?

404
00:22:11,403 --> 00:22:14,003
(DRAMATIC MUSIC BUILDS)

405
00:22:14,043 --> 00:22:16,163
Kirst...

406
00:22:16,203 --> 00:22:19,323
# THE OUTHERE BROTHERS:
Boom, Boom, Boom #

407
00:22:24,003 --> 00:22:26,523
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