1 00:00:43,723 --> 00:00:46,243 My name is Maddalena, I'm 30 years old, 2 00:00:46,323 --> 00:00:48,363 and I do not like anything about myself. 3 00:00:48,443 --> 00:00:52,443 Starting with my body. It's a far cry from the ones seen in commercials, 4 00:00:52,523 --> 00:00:56,043 which is why I don't like it and I'm sure men don't either. 5 00:00:56,123 --> 00:00:59,363 I'm single, but I share my apartment with Stefano, 6 00:00:59,443 --> 00:01:02,803 a roommate I would describe as shitty? 7 00:01:03,603 --> 00:01:07,243 He's lazy. He lives his life like a videogame, 8 00:01:07,323 --> 00:01:09,643 in which I always lose. 9 00:01:11,043 --> 00:01:14,043 My mother, Grazia, is the parish's queen. 10 00:01:14,123 --> 00:01:16,603 A widow with two daughters, me and my sister Maria 11 00:01:16,683 --> 00:01:19,643 who is skinny, married, has one child and another on the way. 12 00:01:19,723 --> 00:01:22,283 Madda, please don't. Carbs will make you fat. 13 00:01:23,243 --> 00:01:25,963 -You need to eat for two. -Thanks, Mom. 14 00:01:26,043 --> 00:01:28,243 Can you guess who her favorite is? 15 00:01:29,883 --> 00:01:31,643 I work for a publishing house as a temp. 16 00:01:31,763 --> 00:01:34,683 My contract is as uncertain as my mental health 17 00:01:34,763 --> 00:01:38,403 because I work a lot and make very little, and get treated... 18 00:01:38,483 --> 00:01:40,003 -Thanks. -...like a doormat. 19 00:01:41,763 --> 00:01:42,883 Except by him. 20 00:01:45,043 --> 00:01:46,683 I'm a ghostwriter. 21 00:01:46,763 --> 00:01:50,203 Basically I write books for people who can't do it themselves... 22 00:01:50,283 --> 00:01:51,443 Drink herbal tea, bitches! 23 00:01:51,522 --> 00:01:53,563 ... and sometimes don't even read them. 24 00:01:53,643 --> 00:01:56,203 Buy the book to get a photo with Samantha. 25 00:01:56,283 --> 00:01:59,723 This rectangular object made of paper that you can flip through 26 00:01:59,802 --> 00:02:01,883 and buy is called a book. 27 00:02:01,963 --> 00:02:04,283 We've given you our best writer. 28 00:02:04,363 --> 00:02:07,723 It feels like you stepped inside my head. 29 00:02:07,803 --> 00:02:10,923 I thought it was empty, but no, she was in there! 30 00:02:11,003 --> 00:02:14,883 Of course, I always fall for the wrong guy. 31 00:02:14,963 --> 00:02:17,643 You're sharp, clever, deep. 32 00:02:19,122 --> 00:02:19,963 Let's fuck. 33 00:02:20,043 --> 00:02:23,003 Or maybe it's me. Maybe I'm the problem. 34 00:02:24,563 --> 00:02:29,283 STILL FABULOUS 35 00:02:44,563 --> 00:02:45,923 It's you. 36 00:02:46,003 --> 00:02:47,443 Who else would it be? 37 00:02:54,003 --> 00:02:55,963 What's all this for? 38 00:02:56,043 --> 00:02:57,923 It's fat-reducing. Helps take the weight off. 39 00:02:58,003 --> 00:03:00,643 Does the reason for this torture have a name? 40 00:03:02,003 --> 00:03:04,003 Not that asshole Donato? 41 00:03:04,083 --> 00:03:05,443 He's not an asshole. 42 00:03:05,523 --> 00:03:08,443 You're about to freeze-dry your self-esteem again. 43 00:03:08,523 --> 00:03:12,323 I hate having to pick up the crumbs of your self-respect. 44 00:03:12,403 --> 00:03:14,603 You can't even brush your own teeth. 45 00:03:14,683 --> 00:03:16,563 This is an eco-friendly toothbrush. 46 00:03:16,643 --> 00:03:18,843 Anyways, Donato and his wife are separating. 47 00:03:18,923 --> 00:03:21,723 He's taking me out this weekend for the first time. 48 00:03:21,803 --> 00:03:23,403 Just the two of us. 49 00:03:46,603 --> 00:03:47,603 Maddalena? 50 00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:55,203 You know, I'm really... 51 00:03:58,923 --> 00:04:00,043 turned on. 52 00:04:01,403 --> 00:04:03,403 Why don't you undress for me? 53 00:04:06,763 --> 00:04:09,243 -Okay. -Room, turn up the music. 54 00:04:39,923 --> 00:04:40,883 Feeling shy? 55 00:04:43,043 --> 00:04:45,563 Even in a baggy tee, you're beautiful. Come here. 56 00:04:54,923 --> 00:04:56,083 You first. 57 00:05:04,323 --> 00:05:05,323 Use your mouth. 58 00:05:06,803 --> 00:05:07,763 What happened? 59 00:05:10,603 --> 00:05:12,563 Room, turn off the lights. 60 00:05:12,643 --> 00:05:14,083 Room, turn on the lights. 61 00:05:15,563 --> 00:05:17,723 -Why? -I like dim lighting. 62 00:05:18,323 --> 00:05:19,203 I don't. 63 00:05:19,283 --> 00:05:20,643 I like to see what I'm doing. 64 00:05:23,603 --> 00:05:25,923 -Okay, no... -What is it? 65 00:05:28,443 --> 00:05:30,563 It can't be like this, Maddalena. 66 00:05:30,643 --> 00:05:34,523 Do you want me to tie you up? Do you want to start off with a sex toy? 67 00:05:34,603 --> 00:05:35,723 Should I spank you? 68 00:05:36,243 --> 00:05:37,363 We could watch porn. 69 00:05:38,123 --> 00:05:39,163 Too much? 70 00:05:40,643 --> 00:05:41,483 Well, 71 00:05:42,643 --> 00:05:44,123 I give up. 72 00:05:44,763 --> 00:05:47,163 I've never been with a woman like you. 73 00:05:47,243 --> 00:05:48,803 What... 74 00:05:48,883 --> 00:05:50,243 What do you mean by that? 75 00:05:50,323 --> 00:05:55,803 A smart woman, a good girl who doesn't care about sex. 76 00:05:55,883 --> 00:05:56,963 That's all. 77 00:06:02,843 --> 00:06:03,923 What is it? 78 00:06:05,523 --> 00:06:08,443 If you don't mind, I'm going to go to sleep. 79 00:06:11,563 --> 00:06:14,243 See you at breakfast. 80 00:06:14,323 --> 00:06:16,123 Room, turn off the lights. 81 00:06:21,563 --> 00:06:22,683 Fuck! 82 00:06:32,003 --> 00:06:33,283 Ste! 83 00:06:33,363 --> 00:06:37,043 -Use a pot to heat up food! -I'd have to wash them after. 84 00:06:39,243 --> 00:06:42,483 -I fucked up with Donato. -No shit. 85 00:06:42,563 --> 00:06:46,763 Don't make that face. I'm not good at comforting people. 86 00:06:46,843 --> 00:06:49,723 -Plus, I'm busy talking to a hot guy. -Come on! 87 00:06:49,803 --> 00:06:52,803 It was a disaster. He said I'm not sexy. 88 00:06:52,883 --> 00:06:54,803 He even asked me to watch porn! 89 00:06:54,883 --> 00:06:57,083 Why not? I do it all the time. 90 00:06:57,163 --> 00:06:59,443 Am I the only one who's never watched porn? 91 00:07:08,123 --> 00:07:09,283 This cake is delicious. 92 00:07:12,323 --> 00:07:13,243 Where are you going? 93 00:07:13,323 --> 00:07:16,083 That's my space cake. There's weed in it. 94 00:07:16,163 --> 00:07:18,203 Be careful. It's too much for you. 95 00:07:18,283 --> 00:07:20,883 Wow. This Legolas guy is hot. 96 00:07:29,963 --> 00:07:32,403 HOW TO BE AMAZING IN BED 97 00:07:35,083 --> 00:07:37,443 HOT? - MAKE HIM MELT GUIDE YOUR MAN TO PLEASURE 98 00:07:47,403 --> 00:07:49,763 HOW TO PLEASE PARTNER VEGAN POPSICLE BLOWJOB 99 00:08:04,043 --> 00:08:06,643 HAVE SEX LIKE A PORNSTAR 100 00:08:12,203 --> 00:08:14,723 PLEASE HIM!!! VALENTINA NAPPI'S SECRETS - ENTER 101 00:09:20,963 --> 00:09:22,123 You okay? 102 00:09:22,203 --> 00:09:23,843 Need a hand or will yours do? 103 00:09:35,403 --> 00:09:37,483 Easy Edizioni, good morning. 104 00:09:37,563 --> 00:09:40,363 He's not available. Do you want to leave a message? 105 00:09:40,443 --> 00:09:41,363 Hi, Erika. 106 00:09:41,443 --> 00:09:44,203 Samantha's book did so well, I had an idea for another. 107 00:09:44,283 --> 00:09:45,923 The weekly sales report? 108 00:09:46,003 --> 00:09:49,563 -I sent it out at 8:00 this morning. -I want it before everyone else. 109 00:09:49,643 --> 00:09:52,883 -Printed out, on my desk at 7:00 a.m. -All right. 110 00:09:52,963 --> 00:09:56,003 Good. If you want to be like me, you have to give it your all. 111 00:09:56,083 --> 00:09:58,243 Actually, I want to be a writer. 112 00:09:58,323 --> 00:10:00,883 I had this idea for a self-help book. 113 00:10:00,963 --> 00:10:04,563 The ultimate manual that will make all others obsolete. 114 00:10:04,643 --> 00:10:08,003 -Ironically, of course. -We love your sense of humor. 115 00:10:08,083 --> 00:10:10,803 Can we talk about this after I pee? 116 00:10:12,723 --> 00:10:14,683 Marilena, please make coffee for everyone. 117 00:10:14,763 --> 00:10:16,603 -Thanks. -It's Maddalena. 118 00:10:17,083 --> 00:10:18,323 My name is Maddalena. 119 00:10:19,163 --> 00:10:20,163 Maddalena. 120 00:10:22,603 --> 00:10:25,043 -They're coming. Donato. -Go. 121 00:10:25,603 --> 00:10:27,323 -We're ready. -Let's do it. 122 00:10:29,443 --> 00:10:30,523 -Sit there. -Okay. 123 00:10:38,563 --> 00:10:39,843 Good morning. 124 00:10:45,523 --> 00:10:47,483 Everybody, please welcome Lara. 125 00:10:47,563 --> 00:10:49,883 Influencer, content creator. 126 00:10:49,963 --> 00:10:52,603 Tommaso is our press guy. 127 00:10:52,683 --> 00:10:55,243 Donato, our Editorial Director. 128 00:10:55,323 --> 00:10:56,923 This is Serena, my manager. 129 00:10:57,003 --> 00:10:58,643 Hello... Stop. 130 00:10:58,723 --> 00:11:00,523 -What are you doing? -It... 131 00:11:00,603 --> 00:11:04,003 Sorry, it's for our social media page. 132 00:11:04,083 --> 00:11:05,883 She has a built-in face filter. 133 00:11:05,963 --> 00:11:09,083 Lara has a flight to Paris to catch, so... 134 00:11:09,163 --> 00:11:12,923 I'm the spokesperson for a product line that doesn't test on animals. 135 00:11:13,003 --> 00:11:16,083 Not that I've ever seen a cow wearing face cream! 136 00:11:17,003 --> 00:11:20,483 We'll be quick. We really believe in this project. 137 00:11:20,563 --> 00:11:22,643 In all modesty, success is our creed. 138 00:11:23,163 --> 00:11:24,003 Your book... 139 00:11:24,603 --> 00:11:26,683 what do you want it to be about? 140 00:11:28,203 --> 00:11:29,043 Me! 141 00:11:29,123 --> 00:11:33,243 Me and all the obstacles I've overcome, 142 00:11:33,323 --> 00:11:34,803 such as brittle fingernails, 143 00:11:34,883 --> 00:11:37,443 oily scalp, split ends... 144 00:11:37,523 --> 00:11:39,403 -My whole story. -Well... 145 00:11:40,083 --> 00:11:42,883 That's an excellent starting point to delve deeper. 146 00:11:42,963 --> 00:11:44,243 Delve deeper? 147 00:11:44,323 --> 00:11:47,323 -You want me to talk about cellulite? -No. 148 00:11:47,403 --> 00:11:52,323 In any case, we can provide you with our best ghostwriter... 149 00:11:52,403 --> 00:11:53,883 And author. 150 00:11:54,323 --> 00:11:57,563 Your book, Lara, will be a bestseller. 151 00:11:57,643 --> 00:12:02,523 We at Easy Edizioni aim to fill the shelves at gas stations, 152 00:12:02,603 --> 00:12:04,883 -supermarkets... -Newsstands. 153 00:12:04,963 --> 00:12:06,843 -Everywhere! -Great. 154 00:12:06,923 --> 00:12:11,883 Unlike award-winning writers, who are losers unable to make big sales, 155 00:12:11,963 --> 00:12:14,683 we go for big numbers. 156 00:12:14,763 --> 00:12:17,923 -We'll have it published by Christmas. -Christmas? Perfect! 157 00:12:18,523 --> 00:12:21,403 I know. Let's make the cover red. 158 00:12:21,483 --> 00:12:24,603 Genius. It'll make the perfect gift. 159 00:12:24,683 --> 00:12:27,923 Red at Christmas, what a novel idea. 160 00:12:28,003 --> 00:12:31,363 -You're a visionary, Lara. -I know! 161 00:12:31,443 --> 00:12:33,123 We'd like for her... 162 00:12:33,203 --> 00:12:36,603 to spend part of the day with you, 163 00:12:36,683 --> 00:12:40,923 so that she'll be able to tell your readers the truth. 164 00:12:42,163 --> 00:12:45,323 Look, nobody likes the truth. 165 00:12:45,403 --> 00:12:48,123 Haven't you noticed that when something is beautiful, 166 00:12:48,203 --> 00:12:49,643 everyone says it looks fake? 167 00:12:49,723 --> 00:12:53,483 It's just a way for the two of you to get to know each other, right... 168 00:12:53,563 --> 00:12:55,163 Maddalena. 169 00:12:55,243 --> 00:12:58,243 Don't worry, she's our best writer. 170 00:12:58,323 --> 00:13:01,403 I'm sure your voice will come through. 171 00:13:07,123 --> 00:13:09,843 Yes. Absolutely. 172 00:13:12,403 --> 00:13:14,243 You drugged me with that cake! 173 00:13:14,323 --> 00:13:16,443 You're the one who took off with it. 174 00:13:16,523 --> 00:13:18,723 Anyway, Grandma Carla's recipe is very mild. 175 00:13:20,603 --> 00:13:22,443 -Do you have any tights? -On me? 176 00:13:22,523 --> 00:13:24,363 -No, at home. -Why do you need them? 177 00:13:25,723 --> 00:13:28,083 -A kink of mine. You got any? -In my drawer. 178 00:13:28,163 --> 00:13:32,523 Listen, Ste, I want to give Donato another chance. 179 00:13:32,603 --> 00:13:34,003 He believes in me. 180 00:13:34,083 --> 00:13:35,883 And he's super-hot. 181 00:13:36,523 --> 00:13:40,443 He loves books! I mean, he's a catch, isn't he? 182 00:13:40,923 --> 00:13:43,123 -What should I do? -What you see in porn. 183 00:13:43,803 --> 00:13:46,843 I can't slip into the shower with him. We're at the office. 184 00:13:48,123 --> 00:13:50,523 I'll throw him in an armchair and I'll ride him. 185 00:13:50,603 --> 00:13:52,363 No, I'm wearing pants. 186 00:13:53,763 --> 00:13:55,603 I'll get on my knees under his desk. 187 00:13:55,683 --> 00:13:58,923 Nice. Bat your eyes at him like Sailor Moon. 188 00:13:59,003 --> 00:14:00,323 Sailor Moon? 189 00:14:00,883 --> 00:14:02,483 Like a horny anime girl. 190 00:14:04,523 --> 00:14:06,043 What if he doesn't understand? 191 00:14:06,123 --> 00:14:07,083 Then he's a moron. 192 00:14:07,163 --> 00:14:09,563 Send him a nude pic. 193 00:14:09,643 --> 00:14:12,443 Actually, since you're at the office, photocopy your boobs. 194 00:14:12,523 --> 00:14:14,763 That's so '90s. 195 00:14:14,843 --> 00:14:16,403 It's coming back. 196 00:14:16,483 --> 00:14:18,763 -It's better than a toilet selfie. -Okay. 197 00:14:18,843 --> 00:14:20,643 Okay, stay on the line. I'll try. 198 00:14:34,803 --> 00:14:35,683 What are you doing? 199 00:14:35,763 --> 00:14:38,083 Running a check. It needs one every now and then. 200 00:14:38,163 --> 00:14:40,443 Of course. 201 00:14:41,123 --> 00:14:42,043 How's it going? 202 00:14:42,683 --> 00:14:43,923 Fine. 203 00:14:44,003 --> 00:14:46,083 Okay. Bye. 204 00:14:48,723 --> 00:14:50,443 Is it in color, at least? 205 00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:51,643 Well... 206 00:14:51,723 --> 00:14:53,603 It's an interesting editorial project. 207 00:14:53,683 --> 00:14:54,723 Is it too much? 208 00:15:04,443 --> 00:15:05,803 I'll take care of it. 209 00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:11,123 All right... 210 00:15:14,403 --> 00:15:15,603 Sailor Moon. 211 00:15:15,683 --> 00:15:17,403 -Sailor Moon. -What are you doing? 212 00:15:23,443 --> 00:15:24,323 Okay! 213 00:15:28,483 --> 00:15:30,483 Are you giving a blowjob or a prostrate check? 214 00:15:31,563 --> 00:15:32,603 Are you okay? 215 00:15:32,683 --> 00:15:34,883 Yes! All good. 216 00:15:34,963 --> 00:15:38,163 -Working under a desk takes some practice. -What's happening to me? 217 00:15:39,163 --> 00:15:40,043 Maddalena. 218 00:15:40,123 --> 00:15:42,203 -Are you real? -I'm not, but those are. 219 00:15:42,283 --> 00:15:43,803 Are you hitting on me? 220 00:15:43,883 --> 00:15:45,323 Maddalena, what's going on? 221 00:15:45,403 --> 00:15:49,403 Nothing. I lost my hair tie. 222 00:15:49,483 --> 00:15:51,763 -I'm fine. -Your hair tie? 223 00:15:51,843 --> 00:15:54,003 -What do you want? -You summoned me. 224 00:15:54,083 --> 00:15:58,003 -Why did you come here? -I can come anywhere. 225 00:15:58,083 --> 00:16:00,083 -Leave! -Maddalena. 226 00:16:00,163 --> 00:16:01,803 Did you change your mind? 227 00:16:02,763 --> 00:16:04,363 It wasn't a bad idea. 228 00:16:04,443 --> 00:16:07,563 No! I mean, yes. Sorry, actually, I... 229 00:16:08,563 --> 00:16:11,723 Actually, sorry. I have so many things to do. 230 00:16:11,803 --> 00:16:14,883 So I have to go do the things I have to to do. 231 00:16:16,923 --> 00:16:19,043 God. Not you again. 232 00:16:19,123 --> 00:16:21,403 When will the effects of the cake wear off? 233 00:16:21,483 --> 00:16:22,923 We need to talk. 234 00:16:23,843 --> 00:16:26,483 -Sorry, did I get you wet? -You're not the first. 235 00:16:27,643 --> 00:16:31,363 -Why is this happening to me? -You watched too much porn. 236 00:16:31,803 --> 00:16:34,803 Billie Eilish is right. "Porn destroys your brain." 237 00:16:34,883 --> 00:16:36,883 No, that's religion. 238 00:16:37,443 --> 00:16:39,163 You're not real. You don't exist. 239 00:16:39,803 --> 00:16:42,523 You're just in my head, you're just in my... 240 00:16:43,043 --> 00:16:45,563 I'm in a lot of people's heads. 241 00:16:46,643 --> 00:16:48,723 Please go away, please. 242 00:16:48,803 --> 00:16:51,443 Go away, please go away. 243 00:16:52,283 --> 00:16:54,403 -Come. -Now? 244 00:16:54,483 --> 00:16:55,443 Come with me. 245 00:16:55,523 --> 00:16:56,843 Sure. 246 00:16:56,923 --> 00:16:59,363 -Where are we going? -Inside your self-esteem. 247 00:16:59,443 --> 00:17:00,523 But that's a toilet. 248 00:17:01,243 --> 00:17:03,043 It's just the entrance. 249 00:17:22,642 --> 00:17:23,523 Voilà! 250 00:17:27,803 --> 00:17:30,323 -This is my self-esteem? -Exactly. 251 00:17:31,123 --> 00:17:33,443 -It's an empty room. -Exactly. 252 00:17:35,283 --> 00:17:39,443 Funny. I thought I'd find my mother comparing me to my sister. 253 00:17:42,043 --> 00:17:43,203 Shit, my sister! 254 00:17:43,283 --> 00:17:47,083 A white cat with blue eyes 255 00:17:47,163 --> 00:17:50,323 An old vase on the TV 256 00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:53,443 The smoke of the candles in the air 257 00:17:53,523 --> 00:17:56,883 Two cheeks, red as apples 258 00:17:56,963 --> 00:17:59,843 She has a potion against jealousy... 259 00:17:59,923 --> 00:18:01,603 Sweets, sweets. 260 00:18:05,003 --> 00:18:06,683 Pineapple helps lose weight. 261 00:18:11,803 --> 00:18:13,203 Isn't your sister talented? 262 00:18:13,283 --> 00:18:15,843 She's always had a beautiful voice. 263 00:18:15,923 --> 00:18:19,563 -She was even chosen for... -The Zecchino d'Oro. I know, Mom. 264 00:18:20,003 --> 00:18:21,563 Then your father died. 265 00:18:23,003 --> 00:18:25,203 And I couldn't take her to the finals. 266 00:18:25,283 --> 00:18:27,403 She would have won for sure. 267 00:18:29,243 --> 00:18:30,963 Well done. Let's eat! 268 00:18:31,043 --> 00:18:32,923 -Let's go! -Fill up those bellies! 269 00:18:33,323 --> 00:18:37,723 Have you seen Marcello's new girlfriend? She's plain, so plain... 270 00:18:37,803 --> 00:18:41,683 "Girlfriend." Marcello never gets serious. 271 00:18:41,763 --> 00:18:44,083 He always looks so handsome though, right? 272 00:18:44,603 --> 00:18:45,643 Which one is he? 273 00:18:45,723 --> 00:18:47,683 -They all look the same. -He's over there. 274 00:18:47,763 --> 00:18:48,683 Mom! 275 00:18:49,483 --> 00:18:51,043 He hasn't changed at all. 276 00:18:52,043 --> 00:18:53,683 You made a wonderful couple. 277 00:18:53,763 --> 00:18:56,123 You and Marcello, Maria and Giuseppe. 278 00:18:56,803 --> 00:19:00,003 Two sisters and two brothers united in the love of Jesus. 279 00:19:00,083 --> 00:19:05,363 If you lost some weight and took better care of yourself, he'd come back to you. 280 00:19:05,443 --> 00:19:09,083 I don't want him back. He broke up with me on Christmas Eve. 281 00:19:10,043 --> 00:19:11,763 After taking his present. 282 00:19:11,843 --> 00:19:13,363 Shall I bless the prosecco? 283 00:19:14,443 --> 00:19:15,443 Father Massimo! 284 00:19:22,363 --> 00:19:24,523 I think your mother wants to bang the vicar. 285 00:19:24,603 --> 00:19:26,883 Not now, Valentina. Go away! 286 00:19:30,123 --> 00:19:31,563 Sister-in-law! A drink? 287 00:19:33,283 --> 00:19:35,443 Actually, Maria wanted to make a toast. 288 00:19:36,243 --> 00:19:38,083 Excuse me! 289 00:19:38,163 --> 00:19:40,283 Now that we're all here. Guys... 290 00:19:40,363 --> 00:19:43,283 I know I shouldn't do this with cranberry juice, 291 00:19:43,363 --> 00:19:48,963 but I would really like to raise a heartfelt toast 292 00:19:49,643 --> 00:19:54,523 to Marcello and Ludovica Vittoria, who've just announced their engagement! 293 00:19:54,603 --> 00:19:56,363 Congratulations! 294 00:19:57,723 --> 00:19:58,723 And to your sister. 295 00:19:58,803 --> 00:20:02,723 And a toast to my big sister, Madda. 296 00:20:02,803 --> 00:20:07,403 I hope that one day you'll finally find a good man 297 00:20:07,483 --> 00:20:11,163 who will make you as happy as Giuseppe makes me every day. 298 00:20:11,243 --> 00:20:13,043 -Thanks. -You deserve it. 299 00:20:13,123 --> 00:20:15,523 We'll pray for you. Won't we, Father Massimo? 300 00:20:15,603 --> 00:20:18,123 -Day and night. -To Madda! 301 00:20:18,203 --> 00:20:19,843 -Thank you. -To Madda! 302 00:20:20,443 --> 00:20:23,203 Now for the long-awaited moment. 303 00:20:23,283 --> 00:20:26,683 -Let me. -The gender reveal! Cut the cake. 304 00:20:26,763 --> 00:20:28,123 -I'm cutting... -Cut away! 305 00:20:28,203 --> 00:20:30,603 -Oh, my God! -What will it be? 306 00:20:31,363 --> 00:20:33,123 Here we go! 307 00:20:35,123 --> 00:20:37,483 -A boy! -It's a boy! 308 00:20:37,563 --> 00:20:39,803 -A boy! -A boy! 309 00:20:41,003 --> 00:20:43,763 Good thing it's a boy. I bought a blue onesie. 310 00:20:43,843 --> 00:20:45,803 You could tell from her pointed belly. 311 00:20:45,883 --> 00:20:48,403 I got her a thermos to store the placenta in. 312 00:20:48,483 --> 00:20:51,723 Cool. I made this with my first placenta. 313 00:20:51,803 --> 00:20:55,443 -I'd like to try cooking it this time. -Do you have a good recipe? 314 00:20:55,523 --> 00:20:57,243 -I'll send it to you. -Thanks! 315 00:20:58,323 --> 00:21:00,763 I enjoy placenta with cheese and pork. 316 00:21:02,643 --> 00:21:06,723 Listen, do you need some air? 317 00:21:06,803 --> 00:21:09,043 -A lot of it? -Yes. 318 00:21:09,883 --> 00:21:10,923 Come with me. 319 00:21:11,003 --> 00:21:12,923 Sorry. Thanks. 320 00:21:13,003 --> 00:21:16,283 -Can I light this? -Yes, of course. 321 00:21:24,163 --> 00:21:26,443 -You smoke? -No, I don't. 322 00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:29,643 I did eat a space cake once. 323 00:21:30,163 --> 00:21:31,683 -Really? -Yes. 324 00:21:32,443 --> 00:21:34,123 I'm the black sheep of the family. 325 00:21:38,203 --> 00:21:39,043 Come on. 326 00:21:42,163 --> 00:21:43,843 -Come on. -Okay. 327 00:21:53,843 --> 00:21:55,763 You have nothing in common with them. 328 00:21:56,243 --> 00:21:58,043 What do you have to do with them? 329 00:21:58,123 --> 00:22:02,003 You'll never believe this, but I was officially invited. 330 00:22:02,083 --> 00:22:03,563 You? 331 00:22:03,643 --> 00:22:05,443 You're breaking my heart! 332 00:22:06,163 --> 00:22:09,243 I've been friends with your brother-in-law for a long time. 333 00:22:09,323 --> 00:22:11,763 My dad and his went to university together. 334 00:22:11,843 --> 00:22:13,843 Now they're colleagues at the hospital. 335 00:22:14,923 --> 00:22:16,643 But while his dad is proud of him, 336 00:22:16,723 --> 00:22:19,043 mine has reconsidered his views on abortion. 337 00:22:25,323 --> 00:22:27,723 So that's why Giuseppe never told me about you. 338 00:22:28,563 --> 00:22:31,083 He's introduced me to all his single friends. 339 00:22:32,403 --> 00:22:33,843 Who says I'm single? 340 00:22:35,163 --> 00:22:38,243 You're right. I'm sorry, I didn't think... 341 00:22:38,323 --> 00:22:40,243 Sorry. You're right. 342 00:22:40,323 --> 00:22:41,723 I... I don't know why... 343 00:22:42,603 --> 00:22:44,243 I've been single for ages. 344 00:22:46,003 --> 00:22:50,403 But Giuseppe would never introduce his wife's sister to someone like me. 345 00:22:50,483 --> 00:22:52,723 -What do you mean? -A black sheep. 346 00:22:55,723 --> 00:22:57,563 You're one too? 347 00:23:00,243 --> 00:23:02,923 Clearly, they don't know the type I usually fall for. 348 00:23:05,883 --> 00:23:08,323 Good thing my second nephew is another boy. 349 00:23:08,403 --> 00:23:10,803 If it was a girl, I would've felt sorry for her. 350 00:23:12,083 --> 00:23:14,323 Destined to diet her whole life, 351 00:23:14,403 --> 00:23:16,603 to look into a mirror and hate herself. 352 00:23:17,483 --> 00:23:21,403 Destined to try on 300 outfits to go on a date with some internet asshole 353 00:23:21,483 --> 00:23:25,763 who thinks he's hot shit because his mom always told him he was special. 354 00:23:30,203 --> 00:23:31,643 You should drop by the club. 355 00:23:32,563 --> 00:23:34,683 It's called L'Altrove. 356 00:23:34,763 --> 00:23:37,843 They're hosting a cool event there on Thursday night. 357 00:23:38,883 --> 00:23:41,363 Okay. Sure. Why not? 358 00:23:45,403 --> 00:23:46,763 I have to go. 359 00:23:48,043 --> 00:23:50,043 Thanks for that. 360 00:23:50,123 --> 00:23:53,323 Whenever you feel like messing around, I'm here. 361 00:23:53,403 --> 00:23:54,483 Okay. 362 00:23:56,003 --> 00:23:57,483 By the way, I'm Leonardo. 363 00:23:58,563 --> 00:23:59,563 Maddalena. 364 00:24:01,163 --> 00:24:02,443 I haven't forgotten. 365 00:24:03,763 --> 00:24:04,843 Be careful. 366 00:24:13,403 --> 00:24:15,603 WHAT DO YOU WANT? 367 00:24:16,483 --> 00:24:18,323 "What do you want?" 368 00:24:19,163 --> 00:24:21,003 You! What do you want? 369 00:24:22,763 --> 00:24:24,283 What do I want? 370 00:24:27,043 --> 00:24:29,123 I want to be sexy! 371 00:24:29,843 --> 00:24:31,323 You finally said it. 372 00:24:33,563 --> 00:24:35,803 What makes you think you're not sexy? 373 00:24:35,883 --> 00:24:37,363 Look at me! 374 00:24:37,443 --> 00:24:39,403 I'd have sex with you. 375 00:24:41,163 --> 00:24:43,483 But I'm not sexy enough for Donato. 376 00:24:44,523 --> 00:24:47,043 Who cares about Donato. Come with me. 377 00:24:53,403 --> 00:24:54,883 Where are we now? 378 00:24:54,963 --> 00:24:56,243 In the world of porn. 379 00:24:56,323 --> 00:24:58,603 Here, women are sorted into categories. 380 00:24:58,683 --> 00:25:00,683 Categories? Who came up with them? 381 00:25:00,763 --> 00:25:03,963 Men. They can't even jerk off without being given directions. 382 00:25:05,243 --> 00:25:08,483 Lesson number one. All women are sexy. 383 00:25:10,883 --> 00:25:13,243 Honestly, I'd fuck the ones without children too. 384 00:25:15,803 --> 00:25:17,523 Poor things. Are they okay? 385 00:25:17,603 --> 00:25:19,723 It's a fashion style. They're fit as a fiddle. 386 00:25:21,843 --> 00:25:24,523 Easy to come across at any Calcutta concert. 387 00:25:24,603 --> 00:25:26,283 I didn't know indie was sexy. 388 00:25:26,363 --> 00:25:28,403 It is. And no shaving required. 389 00:25:28,483 --> 00:25:29,363 Girls. 390 00:25:29,443 --> 00:25:33,763 Lesson number two. To each their own. 391 00:25:35,643 --> 00:25:37,043 For vintage lovers. 392 00:25:39,683 --> 00:25:41,123 Natural girls. 393 00:25:42,723 --> 00:25:46,163 For people who got stuck in the Cristina d'Avena loop. 394 00:25:46,243 --> 00:25:48,203 All these are considered sexy? 395 00:25:49,123 --> 00:25:50,443 Lesson number three. 396 00:25:50,963 --> 00:25:53,683 Women are sexy when they feel sexy. 397 00:25:53,763 --> 00:25:55,763 It's up to you, not the observer. 398 00:25:55,843 --> 00:25:58,483 In fact, lesson number four. 399 00:25:58,563 --> 00:26:01,603 The shape of your body has nothing to do with it. 400 00:26:02,963 --> 00:26:05,403 These are big beautiful women. 401 00:26:05,483 --> 00:26:07,963 Beauties from size 48 and upwards. 402 00:26:08,043 --> 00:26:09,683 They're stunning! 403 00:26:10,323 --> 00:26:12,083 That dress! 404 00:26:23,843 --> 00:26:24,843 Ste. 405 00:26:26,643 --> 00:26:27,563 What's going on? 406 00:26:28,403 --> 00:26:31,803 It's an eco-friendly drying rack. I got it from the dumpster. 407 00:26:31,883 --> 00:26:35,523 I have nothing to wear. Want to come shopping with me? 408 00:26:35,603 --> 00:26:40,243 I can't. It's Thursday. You know I have dinner with my friends on Thursdays. 409 00:26:40,323 --> 00:26:41,763 It's 11:00 a.m. 410 00:26:41,843 --> 00:26:46,243 Don't ask me to be the best friend who takes you to the mall, 411 00:26:46,323 --> 00:26:48,123 I'm not that kind of guy. 412 00:26:48,203 --> 00:26:49,643 I have my dignity. 413 00:26:50,643 --> 00:26:51,483 Yeah. 414 00:26:52,003 --> 00:26:54,083 We wouldn't actually be going to the mall. 415 00:26:54,163 --> 00:26:55,203 No? 416 00:26:56,843 --> 00:26:57,923 No. 417 00:27:16,763 --> 00:27:18,083 Excellent! 418 00:27:18,883 --> 00:27:22,123 Could you warn me before you show up? You keep making me jump! 419 00:27:22,203 --> 00:27:24,803 This would get you tons of views on social media. 420 00:27:24,883 --> 00:27:26,963 -Want to try? -I'll take your word for it. 421 00:27:27,603 --> 00:27:28,683 Nice, isn't it? 422 00:27:29,963 --> 00:27:32,563 If you like it, my work here is done. 423 00:27:32,643 --> 00:27:34,723 No, please, stay with me. 424 00:27:35,523 --> 00:27:36,843 All right. 425 00:27:36,923 --> 00:27:40,843 Let's make a deal. I'll teach you to be sexy, if you learn to love yourself. 426 00:27:42,803 --> 00:27:45,203 I didn't know you were such a romantic. 427 00:27:45,283 --> 00:27:48,203 Yes. I love having anal sex under the stars. 428 00:27:51,923 --> 00:27:54,723 -Do I really look all right? -You look fantastic. 429 00:27:54,803 --> 00:27:58,043 Buy it, put it on, go out and have fun! 430 00:28:00,443 --> 00:28:02,363 Are you hitting on me again? 431 00:28:02,443 --> 00:28:05,043 -Is everything okay? -Yes! Here I am. 432 00:28:09,083 --> 00:28:11,083 You know what, it's not bad. 433 00:28:11,163 --> 00:28:12,963 What are you wearing it to? 434 00:28:15,123 --> 00:28:16,403 Well... 435 00:28:16,483 --> 00:28:19,003 -I thought I might go... -Are you getting shy? 436 00:28:21,723 --> 00:28:22,803 I'm coming with you. 437 00:28:23,443 --> 00:28:24,283 With me? 438 00:28:24,363 --> 00:28:26,403 Yes. With you and your friends. 439 00:28:26,483 --> 00:28:30,123 Let's have a crazy night out. We'll have fun. You never take me out. 440 00:28:30,203 --> 00:28:32,523 -A night out with gays doesn't count. -Shut up! 441 00:28:33,123 --> 00:28:34,243 -What? -No. 442 00:28:34,323 --> 00:28:37,043 It's just if I can't tag along... I'll just shut up. 443 00:28:37,123 --> 00:28:39,843 Of course you can, if you want to. 444 00:28:39,923 --> 00:28:41,363 Thanks. 445 00:28:42,123 --> 00:28:44,003 You're a coward. 446 00:28:44,083 --> 00:28:47,683 Don't talk when people are around or I'll go to therapy and make you vanish. 447 00:28:47,763 --> 00:28:51,003 You don't need therapy for that, nine inches would be enough. 448 00:28:52,523 --> 00:28:53,963 Help me out, I need to feed. 449 00:28:54,763 --> 00:28:56,683 -Turn right. -Okay. 450 00:29:01,883 --> 00:29:03,483 -Hey. -Hi. 451 00:29:05,003 --> 00:29:06,283 What is this place? 452 00:29:06,363 --> 00:29:07,523 These are my friends. 453 00:29:07,603 --> 00:29:10,163 We're Gaymers. Gay gamers. 454 00:29:10,243 --> 00:29:11,923 -Gaymers. -Gay... Yes. 455 00:29:12,843 --> 00:29:13,883 I... 456 00:29:15,603 --> 00:29:19,243 I thought this would be a club, some place to dance and have fun. 457 00:29:20,003 --> 00:29:23,883 We never go to those places. They wouldn't let us in anyway. 458 00:29:23,963 --> 00:29:26,123 Guys, this is Maddalena, my roommate. 459 00:29:26,203 --> 00:29:29,243 You're gorgeous, Maddalena. What character are you? 460 00:29:29,323 --> 00:29:30,563 Where were you hiding her? 461 00:29:30,643 --> 00:29:32,163 You're super sexy! 462 00:29:32,243 --> 00:29:33,483 Really? 463 00:29:33,883 --> 00:29:35,363 Lesson number five. 464 00:29:35,443 --> 00:29:38,003 Learn to take a compliment. Say thank you. 465 00:29:38,083 --> 00:29:39,083 Thanks! 466 00:29:39,723 --> 00:29:41,803 -Do you want to play with us? -Enough! 467 00:29:41,883 --> 00:29:46,003 It's Thursday. You have a date elsewhere, remember? 468 00:29:46,083 --> 00:29:50,123 I would love to, but I just realized I have some place to be... 469 00:29:50,203 --> 00:29:53,803 I'd forgotten. Maybe I'll see you guys later! 470 00:29:53,883 --> 00:29:55,323 Go. Have fun. 471 00:30:00,843 --> 00:30:04,523 Recently, I've realized I'm getting old. 472 00:30:04,603 --> 00:30:06,483 I've found my first gray hairs, 473 00:30:06,563 --> 00:30:10,203 and I never miss an episode of Uomini e Donne. 474 00:30:10,283 --> 00:30:11,563 Throne, over. 475 00:30:13,203 --> 00:30:17,643 When I used to go to clubs like the one we're in now, 476 00:30:17,723 --> 00:30:19,403 I had one goal. 477 00:30:19,483 --> 00:30:22,763 Finding a hot guy who would sleep with me, 478 00:30:22,843 --> 00:30:25,363 and never wanting to hear from me again. 479 00:30:25,443 --> 00:30:28,203 I just spotted one back there... 480 00:30:28,283 --> 00:30:30,923 Meet me in the restroom. 481 00:30:31,003 --> 00:30:34,443 We'll play Rummy. I'll let you win. Call me granny. 482 00:30:36,403 --> 00:30:37,363 Thanks. 483 00:30:38,043 --> 00:30:42,123 With this, I leave the stage to another comedian 484 00:30:42,203 --> 00:30:44,523 who, like me, is brave enough to get up here, 485 00:30:44,603 --> 00:30:46,403 but is terrified of living life. 486 00:30:46,483 --> 00:30:48,083 Leonardo Fedele. 487 00:30:51,643 --> 00:30:52,683 Bravo! 488 00:30:54,443 --> 00:30:57,603 Daniela Delle Foglie. Let's give her another round of applause. 489 00:30:59,763 --> 00:31:02,243 What shall we discuss tonight? 490 00:31:02,323 --> 00:31:06,203 How about a trend that I think signals the end of Western society. 491 00:31:06,643 --> 00:31:10,123 Gender reveals. If you don't know what they are, let me explain. 492 00:31:10,203 --> 00:31:13,603 It's a party of sorts, to announce 493 00:31:13,683 --> 00:31:16,083 and reveal to the world whether the baby 494 00:31:16,163 --> 00:31:18,923 will have a shitty life or not. 495 00:31:19,003 --> 00:31:21,283 In other words, whether it's a boy or a girl. 496 00:31:21,643 --> 00:31:25,243 And I met a girl, who is here with us tonight, 497 00:31:26,043 --> 00:31:30,203 who rightly asked, "Why do we feel the need 498 00:31:30,283 --> 00:31:34,003 "to celebrate the birth of a human who'll be on a lifelong diet? 499 00:31:34,083 --> 00:31:35,763 "Who'll never love herself? 500 00:31:35,843 --> 00:31:39,683 "Who'll have to date someone she met on the internet?" 501 00:31:39,763 --> 00:31:42,683 Someone who might turn out to be a moron. Like me. 502 00:31:43,323 --> 00:31:46,843 No, trust me, I wouldn't wish myself 503 00:31:46,923 --> 00:31:49,723 on the bitchiest bitch. 504 00:31:50,483 --> 00:31:52,163 I laugh at my own farts. 505 00:31:53,123 --> 00:31:54,043 I don't wash much. 506 00:31:54,683 --> 00:31:55,923 I smoke tons of weed. 507 00:31:56,003 --> 00:31:59,363 I live off the small change you drop in my hat. 508 00:31:59,443 --> 00:32:01,843 Which never amounts to very much, assholes! 509 00:32:05,923 --> 00:32:07,523 Acting the clown on this stage 510 00:32:07,603 --> 00:32:12,163 is still better than dancing on social media. 511 00:32:12,243 --> 00:32:14,443 Well said. Enough of these influencers! 512 00:32:14,523 --> 00:32:15,923 I wish they were influencers. 513 00:32:16,563 --> 00:32:21,363 They're lawyers, gynecologists, architects, freelancers! 514 00:32:21,443 --> 00:32:26,803 When exactly did humanity decide to start dancing on social media? 515 00:32:27,683 --> 00:32:29,323 -Thank you. -Bravo! 516 00:32:29,403 --> 00:32:30,763 But let's move on. 517 00:32:35,523 --> 00:32:38,763 -Is it your first time here? -Why? 518 00:32:39,803 --> 00:32:42,283 Because I'm sure I would have noticed you. 519 00:32:44,963 --> 00:32:45,923 What can I get you? 520 00:32:46,003 --> 00:32:48,163 A craft beer, please. 521 00:32:49,843 --> 00:32:53,363 I'll be outside drinking, if you'd like to join me. 522 00:32:53,963 --> 00:32:55,003 Okay. 523 00:32:55,803 --> 00:32:56,763 Okay. 524 00:32:58,763 --> 00:33:00,483 -That'll be five euros. -Sure. 525 00:33:00,563 --> 00:33:01,763 She's my guest. 526 00:33:01,843 --> 00:33:04,243 Give us another and put everything on my tab. 527 00:33:04,323 --> 00:33:06,923 The tab you've been running since 2018 and never settled? 528 00:33:07,003 --> 00:33:10,603 Come on, don't embarrass me in front of my friends! 529 00:33:11,283 --> 00:33:13,643 I swear I'll pay... sooner or later. 530 00:33:13,723 --> 00:33:14,723 Yeah, right. 531 00:33:15,843 --> 00:33:17,683 Thanks. You didn't have to. 532 00:33:17,763 --> 00:33:19,043 No worries. 533 00:33:19,123 --> 00:33:22,683 You gave me so many ideas, it was basically plagiarism. 534 00:33:28,683 --> 00:33:31,483 -Do you want to go for a walk? -Yeah. 535 00:33:33,963 --> 00:33:36,723 -I'll grab my stuff. See you outside? -Yeah. 536 00:33:36,803 --> 00:33:39,283 Sure thing. Give me that. I'll wait! 537 00:33:41,363 --> 00:33:43,643 Bet you 100 euros I can fuck that fatass. 538 00:33:43,723 --> 00:33:44,563 No fucking way. 539 00:33:44,643 --> 00:33:46,563 Did you see her dress? She wants to fuck. 540 00:33:46,643 --> 00:33:50,203 -But does she want to fuck you? -I'm a catch for someone like that. 541 00:33:50,643 --> 00:33:51,563 Stop it. 542 00:33:52,123 --> 00:33:53,603 Wait, sorry... 543 00:33:53,683 --> 00:33:55,043 What are you doing? 544 00:33:55,843 --> 00:33:57,483 He's a moron. 545 00:33:57,563 --> 00:33:59,803 He'd have to pay to be with someone like you. 546 00:34:00,603 --> 00:34:03,243 I didn't mean... What I meant is that you're... 547 00:34:03,323 --> 00:34:05,643 Sorry. I think you're very pretty... 548 00:34:05,723 --> 00:34:06,883 All good? 549 00:34:06,963 --> 00:34:10,603 Leonardo, you're amazing! You crack me up. 550 00:34:10,682 --> 00:34:12,163 And you guys really suck. 551 00:34:13,483 --> 00:34:14,523 Shall we? 552 00:34:17,123 --> 00:34:19,043 Leonardo, we love you! 553 00:34:23,603 --> 00:34:24,843 You should be a writer. 554 00:34:25,563 --> 00:34:28,163 What you told me at the party worked great. 555 00:34:28,242 --> 00:34:31,323 It's actually my job. I'm a ghostwriter. 556 00:34:32,682 --> 00:34:33,803 I should have known. 557 00:34:37,682 --> 00:34:39,003 What do you write about? 558 00:34:39,563 --> 00:34:42,843 You know those self-help books in the top 10 lists? 559 00:34:43,443 --> 00:34:46,923 Such as Find the Guts to be Brave. 560 00:34:48,003 --> 00:34:50,202 Or Be Who You Are, but Maybe Less of an Asshole. 561 00:34:50,803 --> 00:34:53,043 Have you never written anything of your own? 562 00:34:53,123 --> 00:34:56,363 I would like to, but writing a book is hard. 563 00:34:56,443 --> 00:34:58,283 It takes time, a contract. 564 00:34:58,363 --> 00:35:00,923 If you don't have any followers, you're a nobody. 565 00:35:01,003 --> 00:35:04,323 You could go on stage in the meantime. Make yourself heard. 566 00:35:04,403 --> 00:35:05,443 No! 567 00:35:05,523 --> 00:35:07,323 It's not for me. 568 00:35:07,403 --> 00:35:09,163 My place is behind a computer. 569 00:35:09,243 --> 00:35:13,323 -You get to hook up with a lot of people. -I'm very picky. 570 00:35:13,963 --> 00:35:14,963 Really? 571 00:35:15,763 --> 00:35:17,803 What's your type? 572 00:35:19,883 --> 00:35:22,123 I've never told anyone. 573 00:35:23,043 --> 00:35:24,203 Father Pius! 574 00:35:26,843 --> 00:35:29,723 Sorry, but what the fuck are you talking about? 575 00:35:29,803 --> 00:35:31,563 I've had a crush on him for years. 576 00:35:31,643 --> 00:35:34,843 Maybe because my grandma's house was full of pictures of him. 577 00:35:34,923 --> 00:35:36,523 I don't know, it's just... 578 00:35:36,603 --> 00:35:38,523 He's super hipster. 579 00:35:38,603 --> 00:35:40,563 Big beard, mysterious look. 580 00:35:40,643 --> 00:35:42,723 He'd definitely ghost you. 581 00:35:45,003 --> 00:35:46,323 Don't laugh. 582 00:35:46,403 --> 00:35:49,123 That's why I don't like Saint Francis. 583 00:35:49,203 --> 00:35:51,923 Vegan, environmentalist, a dog lover. No way. 584 00:35:52,003 --> 00:35:53,603 No. It's Father Pius for me. 585 00:36:00,243 --> 00:36:03,563 This would sound great on stage. 586 00:36:03,643 --> 00:36:05,243 I think I'll steal it. 587 00:36:06,043 --> 00:36:08,363 I have a... Well, it's not exactly an audition. 588 00:36:08,443 --> 00:36:14,323 Some writers from a comedy TV show are coming to watch us at the club. 589 00:36:16,963 --> 00:36:20,163 If my dad saw me on TV, he might start taking me seriously. 590 00:36:21,523 --> 00:36:22,563 You fight a lot? 591 00:36:23,923 --> 00:36:25,923 Worse. He ignores me. 592 00:36:29,123 --> 00:36:32,923 He's the one who got me started, sending me to church. 593 00:36:33,003 --> 00:36:36,083 What does stand-up comedy have to do with churchgoing? 594 00:36:36,163 --> 00:36:37,403 Back then, 595 00:36:38,043 --> 00:36:41,403 I went to Sunday school and got bullied. 596 00:36:41,483 --> 00:36:43,163 -At Sunday school? -Yes. 597 00:36:43,243 --> 00:36:45,243 -You're kidding. -It's true. 598 00:36:45,323 --> 00:36:47,803 Then one day I lost my temper, 599 00:36:47,883 --> 00:36:50,803 climbed up on the altar, took the mic from the priest, 600 00:36:50,883 --> 00:36:53,723 and started talking shit in front of everyone. 601 00:36:53,803 --> 00:36:56,203 And the assholes who beat me up laughed! 602 00:36:56,723 --> 00:36:57,563 Amazing. 603 00:36:58,603 --> 00:37:00,963 -What did the priest do? -He called an exorcist. 604 00:37:04,123 --> 00:37:06,083 Cute. No way that happened. 605 00:37:08,883 --> 00:37:12,603 DONATO: YOU OKAY? WE SHOULD TALK ABOUT LARA'S BOOK TOMORROW. 606 00:37:12,683 --> 00:37:14,203 I NEED ALL YOUR TALENT... 607 00:37:16,003 --> 00:37:21,363 I should go. It's getting late. I have an early start tomorrow. 608 00:37:23,483 --> 00:37:25,323 -Let's keep in touch. -We will. 609 00:37:25,403 --> 00:37:26,763 -Sure. -Yeah. 610 00:37:27,763 --> 00:37:29,123 Bye. 611 00:37:29,203 --> 00:37:30,243 Sorry. 612 00:37:30,963 --> 00:37:32,083 Bye. 613 00:37:37,723 --> 00:37:40,203 Father Pius? Maybe you're right. 614 00:37:40,283 --> 00:37:42,803 Bald, with a hipster beard. 615 00:37:42,883 --> 00:37:45,083 A bit of a bear. Cool. 616 00:37:52,843 --> 00:37:54,523 Trouble with the washing machine? 617 00:37:55,123 --> 00:37:57,123 -Excuse me? -Your skirt. 618 00:37:57,523 --> 00:37:59,643 It's noticeably shorter than usual. 619 00:37:59,723 --> 00:38:02,003 I wanted to change my style a bit. 620 00:38:03,363 --> 00:38:05,683 -Good choice. -Thanks. 621 00:38:06,963 --> 00:38:09,003 You wanted to talk about Lara's book? 622 00:38:09,403 --> 00:38:13,403 Yes. I scheduled you a meeting for this afternoon. 623 00:38:13,483 --> 00:38:15,763 Do your best. First impressions are important. 624 00:38:15,843 --> 00:38:16,723 Of course. 625 00:38:16,803 --> 00:38:18,283 Then again, 626 00:38:19,003 --> 00:38:21,083 if things go badly, you can always... 627 00:38:22,883 --> 00:38:24,043 try again. 628 00:38:24,123 --> 00:38:25,163 He wants to fuck. 629 00:38:28,363 --> 00:38:30,563 -Are we still talking about Lara? -Of course. 630 00:38:31,803 --> 00:38:35,283 Prep her well. We're announcing the book at FEDVED, 631 00:38:36,123 --> 00:38:38,203 the publishing fair that actually sells. 632 00:38:38,643 --> 00:38:39,843 What a bitch. 633 00:38:40,283 --> 00:38:41,163 Go now. 634 00:38:41,243 --> 00:38:42,603 -I'm going. -Go. 635 00:38:46,923 --> 00:38:48,083 Go. Bye. 636 00:39:00,603 --> 00:39:01,563 Welcome. 637 00:39:02,883 --> 00:39:04,003 Your house is... 638 00:39:04,083 --> 00:39:05,843 Small, I know. It's cramped. 639 00:39:05,923 --> 00:39:07,523 I needed a place downtown. 640 00:39:07,603 --> 00:39:10,283 I'm renovating my lake house, look. 641 00:39:12,123 --> 00:39:15,483 We use this place for work too. It's very convenient. 642 00:39:15,963 --> 00:39:17,563 Sounds good. 643 00:39:17,643 --> 00:39:18,883 Shall we sit here? 644 00:39:18,963 --> 00:39:21,243 We only use that for photos, it's awful. 645 00:39:21,323 --> 00:39:22,963 Let's sit on the real sofa. 646 00:39:23,043 --> 00:39:24,163 Come along. 647 00:39:27,843 --> 00:39:28,683 Here we are. 648 00:39:30,243 --> 00:39:31,203 Girls. 649 00:39:31,763 --> 00:39:33,563 -Thanks. -Thanks. 650 00:39:33,643 --> 00:39:36,683 Have a slice of protein cake. Apples and cinnamon. 651 00:39:38,483 --> 00:39:41,603 -Smells like happiness. -It has the calories of a chickpea. 652 00:39:44,923 --> 00:39:45,763 I know. 653 00:39:48,043 --> 00:39:50,483 Shall we get you ready for the publishing fair? 654 00:39:50,563 --> 00:39:54,843 We'll announce your book and you'll have to answer questions from journalists. 655 00:39:54,923 --> 00:39:56,043 You think I can do it? 656 00:39:56,123 --> 00:39:58,363 Of course. I'll help you. 657 00:39:58,443 --> 00:40:03,163 Sometimes I'm scared of sounding stupid, and of carpeted hotel floors. 658 00:40:03,883 --> 00:40:05,283 Not in this hotel. 659 00:40:05,683 --> 00:40:08,003 The event will be held at a five-star resort. 660 00:40:08,083 --> 00:40:11,443 Those are nothing special, when you have a spa at home. 661 00:40:13,083 --> 00:40:16,803 Where would you like to start? Your family? 662 00:40:16,883 --> 00:40:19,563 My parents separated when I was very young, 663 00:40:19,643 --> 00:40:22,563 and they worked all the time, so I hardly saw them. 664 00:40:22,643 --> 00:40:24,643 My mum now manages my company. 665 00:40:25,323 --> 00:40:27,043 I get along with my dad's girlfriend. 666 00:40:27,123 --> 00:40:28,723 She's my age, so... 667 00:40:28,803 --> 00:40:31,283 I was raised by my grandmother. 668 00:40:31,363 --> 00:40:32,843 She's... 669 00:40:33,763 --> 00:40:36,083 -She's very ill now. -I'm sorry. 670 00:40:37,123 --> 00:40:38,403 What do the doctors say? 671 00:40:38,483 --> 00:40:41,523 That there's nothing to be done. There's no cure 672 00:40:42,363 --> 00:40:43,843 for ingrown nails. 673 00:40:46,163 --> 00:40:48,123 -Oh, dear. -Yeah. 674 00:40:48,723 --> 00:40:52,643 Why don't we go around looking for gender reveal parties to crash? 675 00:40:52,723 --> 00:40:54,323 I need new material. 676 00:40:55,763 --> 00:40:58,683 You could join the pilgrimage to Our Lady of Childbirth, 677 00:40:58,763 --> 00:41:00,963 organized for my sister by my mother. 678 00:41:02,683 --> 00:41:05,763 Wow. A home elevator. 679 00:41:05,843 --> 00:41:08,483 It's practically the size of a studio apartment. 680 00:41:08,563 --> 00:41:11,603 -What a great life she has. -Great? 681 00:41:11,683 --> 00:41:14,643 -Her life is a cage. -What are you talking about? 682 00:41:14,723 --> 00:41:18,283 Lara's famous, she's rolling in cash and everybody wants her. 683 00:41:18,363 --> 00:41:21,163 It must be amazing to be so admired and desired. 684 00:41:21,883 --> 00:41:24,243 Accepted? Picked? 685 00:41:24,683 --> 00:41:26,763 That too, I guess. Why? 686 00:41:27,523 --> 00:41:28,763 If that's what you want. 687 00:41:30,723 --> 00:41:32,083 What's happening? 688 00:41:32,163 --> 00:41:34,323 Open this thing. Valentina, no! 689 00:41:40,443 --> 00:41:42,083 Where are we this time? 690 00:41:42,163 --> 00:41:46,043 -A blow-up doll store? -Sort of. These are women. 691 00:41:46,123 --> 00:41:49,083 Here, women are picked. Look. 692 00:41:50,323 --> 00:41:51,563 But... 693 00:41:54,083 --> 00:41:57,083 This is what you want, right? To be picked. 694 00:41:59,643 --> 00:42:02,443 -That's Maria! -Of course. 695 00:42:04,643 --> 00:42:05,963 Father Massimo! 696 00:42:06,723 --> 00:42:07,803 Where's he going? 697 00:42:08,843 --> 00:42:10,243 My mother is here too? 698 00:42:11,083 --> 00:42:13,603 Yes. They're all here. 699 00:42:16,603 --> 00:42:18,603 Go. Go get picked. 700 00:42:52,203 --> 00:42:56,123 Madda, instead of begging men for attention 701 00:42:56,203 --> 00:42:58,323 in the hopes that someone will finally pick you, 702 00:42:58,403 --> 00:43:00,523 why don't you learn to pick yourself? 703 00:43:01,043 --> 00:43:02,043 What do you mean? 704 00:43:02,123 --> 00:43:03,843 Lesson number six. 705 00:43:03,923 --> 00:43:07,443 In life, you have to figure out what you like and go get it. 706 00:43:07,523 --> 00:43:09,563 You need to become an active subject. 707 00:43:09,643 --> 00:43:11,563 Stop being a passive object. 708 00:43:11,643 --> 00:43:12,683 How do I do that? 709 00:43:15,083 --> 00:43:16,403 Too skinny for me. 710 00:43:17,083 --> 00:43:20,323 Lesson number seven. Never judge a book by its cover. 711 00:43:20,403 --> 00:43:23,043 It might deliver a big surprise. 712 00:43:23,123 --> 00:43:24,043 Madda? 713 00:43:25,483 --> 00:43:26,883 Can I use your straightener? 714 00:43:26,963 --> 00:43:28,443 -Yes. -Thanks. 715 00:43:28,523 --> 00:43:30,043 What do you need it for? 716 00:43:31,963 --> 00:43:32,843 This guy? 717 00:43:33,443 --> 00:43:34,683 Cute. 718 00:43:35,403 --> 00:43:36,963 What if he doesn't like me? 719 00:43:37,043 --> 00:43:39,683 Subject, not object, Madda. 720 00:43:40,483 --> 00:43:42,403 He looks interesting. 721 00:43:42,483 --> 00:43:43,843 Why did you delete him? 722 00:43:44,403 --> 00:43:46,723 He likes inexperienced girls. 723 00:43:46,803 --> 00:43:48,523 Then he's perfect for me. 724 00:43:48,603 --> 00:43:50,563 No, these guys are the worst. 725 00:43:50,643 --> 00:43:53,443 They hate women like me and love women like you. 726 00:43:54,043 --> 00:43:57,843 Because they can shape them into whatever they want. 727 00:43:57,923 --> 00:43:59,123 That is, a mother. 728 00:43:59,843 --> 00:44:01,203 You're right. Thanks. 729 00:44:02,243 --> 00:44:04,523 Enough with the sappy kisses. 730 00:44:04,963 --> 00:44:06,603 Lick my pussy or stop it. 731 00:44:06,683 --> 00:44:07,883 Done. 732 00:44:08,443 --> 00:44:10,683 -Did you use it to toast bread? -No. 733 00:44:10,763 --> 00:44:12,923 I straightened my armpit hair to see how long it is. 734 00:44:13,003 --> 00:44:15,083 It's for a challenge. I won! 735 00:44:16,043 --> 00:44:17,723 Why haven't I kicked him out? 736 00:44:17,803 --> 00:44:20,283 You don't earn enough to live on your own. 737 00:44:22,043 --> 00:44:23,603 He's cute. I like him. 738 00:44:23,683 --> 00:44:25,083 MATCH! MESSAGE - CONTINUE BROWSING 739 00:44:25,163 --> 00:44:28,003 We matched! Amazing! 740 00:44:29,843 --> 00:44:31,243 I get it. All right. 741 00:44:31,323 --> 00:44:32,523 I get it, okay! 742 00:44:52,203 --> 00:44:53,043 Come on. 743 00:44:59,283 --> 00:45:00,963 I'm sure he also has a dick. 744 00:45:21,963 --> 00:45:23,843 Hey. How is he? 745 00:45:24,723 --> 00:45:26,163 He's an XL. 746 00:45:27,123 --> 00:45:28,083 Okay. 747 00:45:57,363 --> 00:45:59,283 So? What's it like to pick? 748 00:45:59,363 --> 00:46:00,363 Nice. 749 00:46:00,923 --> 00:46:05,883 It makes me feel new, powerful, invincible. 750 00:46:05,963 --> 00:46:08,043 It makes me feel sexy! 751 00:46:09,883 --> 00:46:12,963 Ready to seduce... Donato! 752 00:46:13,923 --> 00:46:16,083 No! Not Donato! 753 00:46:16,923 --> 00:46:18,563 Not Donato! 754 00:46:20,203 --> 00:46:21,283 Fuck it! 755 00:46:36,683 --> 00:46:38,123 Yeah, he'll never notice me. 756 00:46:38,203 --> 00:46:40,683 Cut it out! Have I taught you nothing? 757 00:46:40,763 --> 00:46:43,203 You're still comparing yourself to others? 758 00:46:43,283 --> 00:46:46,763 These "others" are extremely hot! 759 00:46:46,843 --> 00:46:50,123 Then picture them as they... I don't know. Pop a pimple. 760 00:46:50,203 --> 00:46:51,563 They're still hot. 761 00:46:51,643 --> 00:46:53,283 Lesson number eight. 762 00:46:53,363 --> 00:46:56,403 Why waste time comparing yourself to other women, 763 00:46:56,483 --> 00:46:57,883 when you could bang them. 764 00:46:59,643 --> 00:47:01,283 You're not helping. 765 00:47:02,203 --> 00:47:03,403 There's Erika. Let's go. 766 00:47:04,203 --> 00:47:06,923 Finally. Check us in, we're busy. 767 00:47:07,003 --> 00:47:09,363 Have you seen Lara? I can't tell her apart. 768 00:47:09,443 --> 00:47:11,443 -They all look the same. -She's over there. 769 00:47:12,523 --> 00:47:13,803 The writer is very good. 770 00:47:13,883 --> 00:47:16,923 -Isn't that... -He had a book written too. 771 00:47:17,003 --> 00:47:17,923 I'll send it to you. 772 00:47:18,003 --> 00:47:20,883 They're friends. Let's ask him to help with the launch. 773 00:47:20,963 --> 00:47:22,483 Great idea! Take care of it. 774 00:47:23,243 --> 00:47:24,403 Where's Donato? 775 00:47:24,483 --> 00:47:26,163 Waiting in the conference room. 776 00:47:26,243 --> 00:47:27,283 -See you there. -Okay. 777 00:47:27,603 --> 00:47:28,803 Thank you. 778 00:47:28,883 --> 00:47:30,163 -Good work. -Sorry. 779 00:47:31,603 --> 00:47:32,643 Right. 780 00:47:37,203 --> 00:47:40,203 -How boring. There's no pictures. -Why bring it to the spa? 781 00:47:40,283 --> 00:47:43,043 Mariano gave me this. What should I do with it? 782 00:47:43,883 --> 00:47:45,563 Post it to your Stories, I guess. 783 00:47:46,363 --> 00:47:48,483 Can we invite him to the launch? 784 00:47:48,563 --> 00:47:49,883 What kind of Stories? 785 00:47:50,803 --> 00:47:51,843 I don't know... 786 00:47:51,923 --> 00:47:54,763 Like what you usually post to promote something. 787 00:47:54,843 --> 00:47:57,963 For example, "I'll try out this cream and let you know." 788 00:47:58,043 --> 00:47:59,443 The usual. 789 00:48:00,123 --> 00:48:03,163 How do I try out a book? 790 00:48:06,403 --> 00:48:07,563 Good question. 791 00:48:07,643 --> 00:48:09,443 -You read it? -Read? 792 00:48:10,843 --> 00:48:13,083 I'm going to the spa, I need to focus. 793 00:48:13,843 --> 00:48:19,203 You're so good at everything you do, couldn't you summarize it for me? 794 00:48:19,283 --> 00:48:20,883 Please. Pretty please. 795 00:48:20,963 --> 00:48:22,963 Thanks a million. 796 00:48:23,043 --> 00:48:25,163 You were right, this place is charming. 797 00:48:25,243 --> 00:48:26,963 And the floors aren't carpeted. 798 00:48:31,083 --> 00:48:32,323 Please, come in. 799 00:48:32,403 --> 00:48:34,123 How Do I Try Out a Book? 800 00:48:34,203 --> 00:48:37,563 The perfect title for an essay on the death of publishing. 801 00:48:38,003 --> 00:48:39,563 I'd publish it. 802 00:48:40,643 --> 00:48:42,803 Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. 803 00:48:43,723 --> 00:48:45,323 I'm Malika. Nice to meet you. 804 00:48:45,403 --> 00:48:46,563 Maddalena. 805 00:48:46,643 --> 00:48:48,203 Hello, Maddalena. 806 00:48:48,283 --> 00:48:52,203 I run a small publishing house, and published this. 807 00:48:53,403 --> 00:48:54,723 Should I give it to Lara? 808 00:48:54,803 --> 00:48:55,923 No, it's for you. 809 00:48:56,563 --> 00:48:58,203 I'd like your opinion. 810 00:48:58,283 --> 00:49:01,243 Perhaps you'd like to write something similar? 811 00:49:03,083 --> 00:49:04,843 How do you know I'm a writer? 812 00:49:04,923 --> 00:49:06,883 Your aura. 813 00:49:06,963 --> 00:49:07,963 Of bad luck? 814 00:49:08,043 --> 00:49:09,963 No. Your ghostwriter aura. 815 00:49:10,043 --> 00:49:13,643 Everyone in the industry is familiar with the writers in the top 10. 816 00:49:14,523 --> 00:49:19,563 My business card is inside. If you want to write, you know where to find me. 817 00:49:19,643 --> 00:49:20,483 Okay. 818 00:49:21,083 --> 00:49:22,203 Malika. 819 00:49:22,803 --> 00:49:25,243 If I were to write a book, whose name would be on it? 820 00:49:26,643 --> 00:49:28,163 Yours. 821 00:49:28,243 --> 00:49:29,603 Hope to see you soon. 822 00:49:29,683 --> 00:49:30,643 See you soon. 823 00:49:32,003 --> 00:49:33,003 Mine. 824 00:49:37,003 --> 00:49:38,243 Fuck! Mariano. 825 00:49:43,883 --> 00:49:45,083 Six, eight. 826 00:49:46,403 --> 00:49:48,443 Which room is he in? 827 00:49:48,523 --> 00:49:49,563 Six, six. 828 00:49:54,483 --> 00:49:57,523 -Mariano Di Vaio. Yes. -Hey... 829 00:49:57,603 --> 00:50:00,163 I don't usually walk around like this. I was at the spa. 830 00:50:00,963 --> 00:50:02,243 No problem. 831 00:50:03,603 --> 00:50:06,123 You have no idea how many pornos start this way. 832 00:50:07,003 --> 00:50:08,243 The key's not working. 833 00:50:08,683 --> 00:50:10,963 -The old-fashioned ones worked better. -Need a hand? 834 00:50:11,043 --> 00:50:13,243 -Only a hand? -Don't worry about it. 835 00:50:14,163 --> 00:50:15,683 I'll break it down. 836 00:50:15,763 --> 00:50:17,643 What a man. 837 00:50:18,243 --> 00:50:19,403 Is that my book? 838 00:50:20,603 --> 00:50:22,523 Yes. Lara gave it to me. 839 00:50:22,603 --> 00:50:23,923 You know Lara? 840 00:50:24,483 --> 00:50:25,723 Sort of. 841 00:50:25,803 --> 00:50:27,763 Are you sure you don't need help? 842 00:50:29,003 --> 00:50:30,883 It's all yours. 843 00:50:37,443 --> 00:50:38,443 Voilà. 844 00:50:39,083 --> 00:50:40,363 I owe you one. 845 00:50:41,203 --> 00:50:43,323 Can I do anything for you? 846 00:50:43,403 --> 00:50:44,923 Ask him. 847 00:50:46,803 --> 00:50:49,283 The launch of Lara's book, 848 00:50:49,363 --> 00:50:52,363 -it would be really helpful if you came. -Is that all? 849 00:50:52,883 --> 00:50:54,003 Is that all? 850 00:50:54,083 --> 00:50:56,483 -Ask him. -Shut up for a minute. 851 00:50:58,003 --> 00:50:59,723 Could I have your towel? 852 00:51:01,603 --> 00:51:03,483 Good girl! Lesson number nine. 853 00:51:03,563 --> 00:51:05,883 Boldness is always a good idea. 854 00:51:15,243 --> 00:51:16,523 Fuck. 855 00:51:17,283 --> 00:51:18,803 Go ahead. Have a good evening. 856 00:51:19,563 --> 00:51:21,603 -Hello, I'm... -Your name, please. 857 00:51:21,683 --> 00:51:23,923 I have to see if you're on the list. 858 00:51:24,003 --> 00:51:25,483 I work for the publishing company. 859 00:51:25,563 --> 00:51:28,323 Good for you. I still need your name. 860 00:51:28,403 --> 00:51:29,843 Maddalena Gentili. 861 00:51:29,923 --> 00:51:31,763 Maddalena Gentili... 862 00:51:32,243 --> 00:51:33,883 With a J or a G? 863 00:51:34,563 --> 00:51:36,443 -With a G. -G. 864 00:51:37,323 --> 00:51:38,323 It's not there. 865 00:51:39,923 --> 00:51:41,843 Try... Try Marilena. 866 00:51:43,883 --> 00:51:44,923 No. 867 00:51:46,203 --> 00:51:48,523 Are you checking the Easy Edizioni list? 868 00:51:48,603 --> 00:51:51,123 -It's got to be there. -Sorry. 869 00:51:52,123 --> 00:51:57,283 Look, my colleagues are inside. Let me through and I'll fix this. 870 00:51:57,363 --> 00:52:00,163 -It'll only take a second. -No need to get agitated. 871 00:52:00,243 --> 00:52:01,563 I can't let you through. 872 00:52:01,643 --> 00:52:04,763 There are limited seats. It's an insider event. 873 00:52:04,843 --> 00:52:07,603 I'm the one writing this masterpiece. 874 00:52:07,683 --> 00:52:08,923 Sure you are. 875 00:52:10,123 --> 00:52:12,443 Sorry, I'm following directions. 876 00:52:12,523 --> 00:52:15,083 We've been instructed not to let Lara's fans in. 877 00:52:15,163 --> 00:52:17,243 Fan? I'm not a fan. 878 00:52:17,323 --> 00:52:20,003 Do you know how many have tried this today? 879 00:52:20,083 --> 00:52:21,443 Come on now. 880 00:52:21,523 --> 00:52:23,643 If you're not on the list, you don't exist. 881 00:52:23,723 --> 00:52:25,563 I don't exist if I'm not on the list? 882 00:52:25,643 --> 00:52:28,163 -What's your name? -Maddalena, lower your voice. 883 00:52:28,243 --> 00:52:30,203 -She's with me. -I'm with him. 884 00:52:30,283 --> 00:52:31,403 Update the list. 885 00:52:31,483 --> 00:52:33,523 I'm so sorry. Make way for the famous writer! 886 00:52:33,603 --> 00:52:37,563 Give these to the guys writing for Social and Terza età. Go. 887 00:52:38,563 --> 00:52:40,283 -Group photo! -Let's go. 888 00:52:40,363 --> 00:52:41,683 -Come on. -All right. 889 00:52:41,763 --> 00:52:44,043 -Squeeze closer. -All together now. 890 00:52:44,123 --> 00:52:46,323 Di Vaio came, did you see? 891 00:52:46,403 --> 00:52:48,803 Maddy! Come take a photo with us! 892 00:52:48,883 --> 00:52:50,203 No. She can't. 893 00:52:50,283 --> 00:52:51,563 Why not? She's so talented. 894 00:52:51,643 --> 00:52:53,763 Best to keep her contribution quiet. 895 00:52:53,843 --> 00:52:56,523 You can't tell she wrote my book from a photo! 896 00:52:56,603 --> 00:52:59,603 She worked with me and I want her in the picture. 897 00:52:59,683 --> 00:53:02,123 -I said no. She works for me. -Lower your voices. 898 00:53:02,203 --> 00:53:03,843 These dramatics are stupid. 899 00:53:06,803 --> 00:53:08,603 -Why not? -Have you seen her? 900 00:53:08,683 --> 00:53:10,323 She's clumsy and awkward. 901 00:53:10,403 --> 00:53:13,483 Look at the clothes she wears. 902 00:53:13,563 --> 00:53:15,963 -She looks like a pear. -She's right there. 903 00:53:18,643 --> 00:53:20,923 -Come on. -You shouldn't talk like that. 904 00:53:21,003 --> 00:53:23,803 I give up. I've never been with a woman like you... 905 00:53:23,883 --> 00:53:26,443 Bet you 100 euro I can fuck that fatass. 906 00:53:26,523 --> 00:53:30,523 If you lost some weight and took better care of yourself, he'd come back to you. 907 00:53:30,603 --> 00:53:33,563 Look at the clothes she wears. She looks like a pear. 908 00:53:36,283 --> 00:53:38,643 I don't want to be in your fucking picture anyway. 909 00:53:38,723 --> 00:53:40,723 Donato, can you... Thanks. 910 00:53:40,803 --> 00:53:41,923 -Excuse us. -Maddalena. 911 00:53:43,123 --> 00:53:44,043 Come along. 912 00:53:44,803 --> 00:53:46,643 -Behave, please. -"Behave"? 913 00:53:47,363 --> 00:53:49,483 Behave? I always behave. 914 00:53:49,563 --> 00:53:52,603 I'm tired of behaving in front of someone 915 00:53:52,683 --> 00:53:56,203 who says my body ruins a book launch. 916 00:53:56,283 --> 00:53:59,803 You're ruining the launch, Marilena. Enough already. 917 00:53:59,883 --> 00:54:02,003 Maddalena. My name is Maddalena. 918 00:54:02,083 --> 00:54:05,043 I didn't know being a writer required a perfect body. 919 00:54:05,123 --> 00:54:08,963 Is that why you've ignored my ideas for months, if not years? 920 00:54:09,043 --> 00:54:09,923 Of course. 921 00:54:10,003 --> 00:54:14,243 You have to be skinny, beautiful and famous to be successful. 922 00:54:14,323 --> 00:54:16,883 Sorry, Lara. This goes for ghostwriters too. 923 00:54:16,963 --> 00:54:21,003 Those of us who write books for people who don't even read them. 924 00:54:23,203 --> 00:54:28,203 I'm tired of feeling bad because the world finds it convenient. 925 00:54:28,283 --> 00:54:33,083 It's convenient for me to spend money on miraculous herbal tea and slimming belts, 926 00:54:33,163 --> 00:54:35,043 or on fucking books telling me 927 00:54:35,123 --> 00:54:38,723 how to improve my life and hide my flaws under my clothes. 928 00:54:38,803 --> 00:54:43,243 Wouldn't our lives improve if we simply accepted ourselves the way we are? 929 00:54:43,323 --> 00:54:46,243 Thin, fat, pretty, ugly. 930 00:54:46,323 --> 00:54:47,403 Cool. 931 00:54:47,483 --> 00:54:48,603 Uncool. 932 00:54:48,683 --> 00:54:50,323 Like me. 933 00:54:50,403 --> 00:54:54,523 Snap your photos and write your own books. I'm done with this. 934 00:54:55,043 --> 00:54:57,843 I want to stop hating myself. Don't you? 935 00:54:57,923 --> 00:55:02,043 Aren't you tired of judging people the way you judge books? 936 00:55:02,683 --> 00:55:04,363 By the cover. 937 00:55:04,443 --> 00:55:05,403 Come on. 938 00:55:06,163 --> 00:55:09,523 Besides, I like my cover a lot. 939 00:55:09,603 --> 00:55:11,563 And many other people like it too. 940 00:55:12,243 --> 00:55:14,643 You're fired. I never want to see you again. 941 00:55:15,243 --> 00:55:16,923 -Erika, please. -Me?! 942 00:55:20,123 --> 00:55:20,963 Well said. 943 00:55:21,043 --> 00:55:22,523 -Awesome. -Well done. 944 00:55:23,003 --> 00:55:24,283 Someone finally said it. 945 00:55:28,043 --> 00:55:29,843 Take my hand 946 00:55:30,443 --> 00:55:32,523 Lord 947 00:55:33,243 --> 00:55:35,683 Guide me through the world as you see fit 948 00:55:35,763 --> 00:55:38,083 This is Father Massimo's seat. Sit over there. 949 00:55:38,163 --> 00:55:43,443 The road is long and hard 950 00:55:43,523 --> 00:55:48,083 But I hold no fear with you in my heart 951 00:55:48,883 --> 00:55:52,163 I couldn't wait to travel 952 00:55:52,243 --> 00:55:55,603 Don't use your phone on a pilgrimage. Hand it over. 953 00:55:55,683 --> 00:55:57,003 -Mom. -Hand it over. 954 00:55:57,083 --> 00:55:59,603 -Let me turn it off. -It's an addiction. 955 00:55:59,683 --> 00:56:01,083 I'll turn it off. 956 00:56:01,163 --> 00:56:03,083 ...A woman 957 00:56:04,323 --> 00:56:09,123 Take my hand, Lord 958 00:56:09,763 --> 00:56:14,643 Guide me through the world as you see fit 959 00:56:20,043 --> 00:56:21,563 Are you all right, Madda? 960 00:56:21,643 --> 00:56:24,163 Just catching my breath. 961 00:56:24,243 --> 00:56:27,043 You can't stop. We have to reach the top together. 962 00:56:27,523 --> 00:56:30,083 Otherwise, Our Lady of Childbirth won't bless your sister. 963 00:56:30,163 --> 00:56:32,683 -How will she get through labor? -With an epidural. 964 00:56:32,763 --> 00:56:34,763 I'm taking a break. Give me a minute. 965 00:56:34,843 --> 00:56:37,243 Madda, all you do is take breaks. 966 00:56:37,323 --> 00:56:38,483 You waste time. 967 00:56:39,003 --> 00:56:43,283 Life should be taken head on. Got it? Now grit your teeth and let's go. 968 00:56:43,363 --> 00:56:46,323 You have to fight. You need to learn to fight. 969 00:56:46,403 --> 00:56:48,603 You think you taught me to fight? 970 00:56:48,683 --> 00:56:49,963 Yeah, right. 971 00:56:50,043 --> 00:56:53,403 All my life, you've been sabotaging my self-esteem. 972 00:56:53,483 --> 00:56:57,163 "Madda, do this," "Don't do that," "Eat pineapple, it helps weight loss." 973 00:56:57,243 --> 00:56:59,203 So don't complain that I've given up, 974 00:56:59,283 --> 00:57:02,043 or about the fact I'm single, ugly, sad and unemployed! 975 00:57:03,723 --> 00:57:04,843 You're unemployed? 976 00:57:05,363 --> 00:57:06,683 Yes, and it's your fault. 977 00:57:19,723 --> 00:57:21,083 See you up there? 978 00:57:21,163 --> 00:57:23,803 Don't even think about ditching me. Come with me. 979 00:57:28,403 --> 00:57:29,443 Beautiful! 980 00:57:30,763 --> 00:57:32,443 That was harder than a gang bang. 981 00:57:41,363 --> 00:57:45,123 Sister-in-law, have I ever introduced you to my childhood friend, Leonardo? 982 00:57:46,003 --> 00:57:46,963 -No. -No. 983 00:57:47,043 --> 00:57:49,243 Then let's get it done now! 984 00:57:49,323 --> 00:57:52,203 My love, zip up your jacket, you'll catch a cold! 985 00:57:52,283 --> 00:57:53,683 Stop fussing. 986 00:57:53,763 --> 00:57:55,203 You came. 987 00:57:55,283 --> 00:57:59,403 I couldn't miss this. I'll have enough material for three shows. 988 00:58:00,363 --> 00:58:03,043 -Shall we join together in prayer? -Let's join together. 989 00:58:03,123 --> 00:58:05,643 Let's go say a Rosary. 990 00:58:05,723 --> 00:58:08,043 -Want to join them? -Do we have to? 991 00:58:08,803 --> 00:58:10,523 Not at all. Come with me. 992 00:58:10,603 --> 00:58:13,123 Where to? Where are we going? 993 00:58:13,203 --> 00:58:14,643 It's a surprise. 994 00:58:16,323 --> 00:58:19,123 Keep your eyes closed. We're nearly there. 995 00:58:19,203 --> 00:58:20,243 Okay. 996 00:58:20,323 --> 00:58:23,443 Careful, there's some mud here. 997 00:58:23,523 --> 00:58:25,363 -Which way? -Follow me. Don't worry. 998 00:58:25,443 --> 00:58:27,403 -Trust me. Mind the poop. -No! 999 00:58:27,483 --> 00:58:28,443 You stepped in it. 1000 00:58:28,523 --> 00:58:30,963 -You're joking. -I was. 1001 00:58:31,923 --> 00:58:33,563 Careful now. 1002 00:58:33,643 --> 00:58:35,523 -Okay. -It's a bit steep. 1003 00:58:36,083 --> 00:58:37,443 -Okay. -Easy does it. 1004 00:58:38,243 --> 00:58:39,683 -Now... -Help! 1005 00:58:39,763 --> 00:58:40,803 -Help! -Come along. 1006 00:58:40,883 --> 00:58:42,763 -Am I going to die? -Why would you? 1007 00:58:42,843 --> 00:58:44,763 -I don't know. -I prefer you alive. 1008 00:58:44,843 --> 00:58:46,483 -How strange... -Up you come. 1009 00:58:46,563 --> 00:58:49,203 -What's this? -Now... 1010 00:58:49,283 --> 00:58:50,643 Open your arms. 1011 00:58:51,323 --> 00:58:54,243 -You want to do the Titanic pose? -Much better than that. 1012 00:58:55,203 --> 00:58:57,443 Close your arms and open your eyes. 1013 00:58:59,963 --> 00:59:01,243 No way! 1014 00:59:02,523 --> 00:59:04,443 Father Pius! 1015 00:59:04,523 --> 00:59:05,843 I don't believe this! 1016 00:59:05,923 --> 00:59:08,323 You're completely crazy! 1017 00:59:08,403 --> 00:59:10,283 You said he was your type! 1018 00:59:10,363 --> 00:59:11,403 He is. 1019 00:59:12,203 --> 00:59:13,603 How wonderful! 1020 00:59:23,283 --> 00:59:25,723 I'm glad I came here. 1021 00:59:26,243 --> 00:59:29,163 Surrounded by sheep, in the company of a black sheep. 1022 00:59:30,243 --> 00:59:31,963 I'm a black sheep too. 1023 00:59:32,523 --> 00:59:33,763 Look there. 1024 00:59:34,163 --> 00:59:36,283 Two black sheep making their own flock. 1025 00:59:45,963 --> 00:59:46,923 Anyways... 1026 00:59:48,283 --> 00:59:51,323 I really will write a piece about the pilgrimage. 1027 00:59:51,883 --> 00:59:53,763 Yeah. Are you coming to the audition? 1028 00:59:54,243 --> 00:59:56,363 It's an open event. 1029 00:59:56,443 --> 01:00:00,003 The writers want feedback. I need some loud laughter. 1030 01:00:00,083 --> 01:00:04,283 -I'll roll you a blunt before the show. -There's no need. 1031 01:00:04,363 --> 01:00:05,523 Of course I'll be there. 1032 01:00:08,043 --> 01:00:10,763 You'll do great. Everyone will love it. 1033 01:00:12,443 --> 01:00:13,763 You'll get to be on TV. 1034 01:00:15,203 --> 01:00:18,483 And you'll make your dad proud. 1035 01:00:22,043 --> 01:00:23,923 Let's hope so. 1036 01:00:27,723 --> 01:00:29,123 Don't be reckless. 1037 01:00:30,043 --> 01:00:31,963 -See you around? -Don't be reckless. 1038 01:00:32,043 --> 01:00:33,603 -Don't commit impure acts. -Bye. 1039 01:00:34,003 --> 01:00:36,123 Again, don't be reckless. 1040 01:00:38,523 --> 01:00:39,843 Don't be reckless. 1041 01:00:41,083 --> 01:00:42,003 Where's Mom? 1042 01:00:42,083 --> 01:00:45,643 In the car. Did you purposely miss the bus to avoid her? 1043 01:00:45,723 --> 01:00:47,723 That would be impossible. 1044 01:00:47,803 --> 01:00:52,083 This is from her. Try and make up, or I'll be dragged into it. 1045 01:00:52,683 --> 01:00:54,603 -Is that Leonardo? -Yes. 1046 01:00:55,563 --> 01:00:56,683 Be careful. 1047 01:01:02,603 --> 01:01:05,403 One day without your phone and the world goes mad? 1048 01:01:05,483 --> 01:01:07,563 I don't know what's going on. 1049 01:01:07,643 --> 01:01:09,803 But something must have happened. 1050 01:01:09,883 --> 01:01:11,643 I'm getting lots of new followers. 1051 01:01:12,283 --> 01:01:13,123 No way! 1052 01:01:13,203 --> 01:01:16,003 Someone filmed my rant at the fair! 1053 01:01:16,443 --> 01:01:17,643 Shit! 1054 01:01:18,763 --> 01:01:20,683 I think you've gone... 1055 01:01:22,083 --> 01:01:23,523 -viral! -Viral! 1056 01:01:23,603 --> 01:01:25,203 Cool. 1057 01:01:25,283 --> 01:01:27,683 Just don't start drinking herbal tea. 1058 01:01:27,763 --> 01:01:29,363 No... 1059 01:01:29,443 --> 01:01:30,963 Excuse me. 1060 01:01:33,003 --> 01:01:36,803 DONATO: COME TO THE OFFICE TOMORROW 1061 01:01:39,483 --> 01:01:40,883 -Shall we go? -Yeah. 1062 01:01:40,963 --> 01:01:41,803 Okay. 1063 01:01:43,443 --> 01:01:45,603 Are you sure you want to do this, Lara? 1064 01:01:45,683 --> 01:01:49,523 -I'm worried you'll lose the contract. -No, the truth is trendy right now. 1065 01:01:49,603 --> 01:01:51,003 Look at Maddalena. 1066 01:01:51,723 --> 01:01:53,643 -Hey. -Hi. 1067 01:01:53,723 --> 01:01:55,243 -Hello, Madda. -Hello. 1068 01:01:55,963 --> 01:01:58,443 I'm sorry we aren't working together anymore. 1069 01:01:58,523 --> 01:02:00,643 -I feel kind of guilty... -Don't. 1070 01:02:01,523 --> 01:02:05,123 We just met my new gho... gha... The new you. 1071 01:02:05,203 --> 01:02:07,563 She's nice, but you were cooler. 1072 01:02:07,643 --> 01:02:09,843 Thanks. Don't worry. 1073 01:02:10,563 --> 01:02:13,963 I figured they'd assign you a new ghostwriter. 1074 01:02:14,723 --> 01:02:17,763 I screwed up, so... 1075 01:02:17,843 --> 01:02:21,243 At least you're an influencer now. Why don't you come to my party? 1076 01:02:21,323 --> 01:02:23,043 It's actually a private party 1077 01:02:23,123 --> 01:02:26,403 for the launch of the beauty line Lara is the face of. 1078 01:02:26,483 --> 01:02:27,883 Di Vaio will be there too. 1079 01:02:27,963 --> 01:02:29,443 He asked for your number. 1080 01:02:29,523 --> 01:02:32,843 -I gave it to him. He's the Di Vaio. -That's good. 1081 01:02:32,923 --> 01:02:34,723 -Promise to think about it? -Yeah. 1082 01:02:36,563 --> 01:02:39,163 You see these cadeaux, Maddalena? 1083 01:02:39,243 --> 01:02:42,963 Brands sent them after you went viral. 1084 01:02:43,683 --> 01:02:45,723 They're for you. Tag the brands. 1085 01:02:46,563 --> 01:02:48,003 Everyone knows who you are now. 1086 01:02:48,083 --> 01:02:51,763 We've always known. And we always had faith in you. 1087 01:02:51,843 --> 01:02:54,523 How many projects did we trust her with? 1088 01:02:55,123 --> 01:02:56,363 How many? 1089 01:02:56,443 --> 01:02:58,123 Shall we bury the hatchet? 1090 01:02:58,603 --> 01:03:01,043 I'm not fired anymore? 1091 01:03:03,203 --> 01:03:07,603 You are. Only because we want to offer you an exclusive contract to write a book. 1092 01:03:07,683 --> 01:03:09,803 We want you to write a book. 1093 01:03:11,003 --> 01:03:13,003 A book of your very own. 1094 01:03:13,083 --> 01:03:15,043 Don't trust them. 1095 01:03:15,123 --> 01:03:18,763 You really must write something about this lovely business 1096 01:03:18,843 --> 01:03:21,003 of accepting yourself as you are. 1097 01:03:21,083 --> 01:03:22,483 People love it. 1098 01:03:23,043 --> 01:03:26,163 Body positivity is all the rage. 1099 01:03:26,243 --> 01:03:30,403 Your success on social media proves that this is your moment. 1100 01:03:30,923 --> 01:03:32,563 You must ride the wave. 1101 01:03:33,603 --> 01:03:35,843 This is your big chance. 1102 01:03:36,643 --> 01:03:38,803 We're your big chance. 1103 01:03:38,883 --> 01:03:40,203 Or are you theirs? 1104 01:03:45,883 --> 01:03:48,083 -Ste, guess what... Hello. -Hello. 1105 01:03:48,163 --> 01:03:50,643 They've asked me to write a book of my own! 1106 01:03:51,163 --> 01:03:52,643 Great! 1107 01:03:53,683 --> 01:03:55,003 Where are you going? 1108 01:03:55,603 --> 01:03:57,963 To stay at Giacomo's. He's my boyfriend. 1109 01:04:01,403 --> 01:04:03,603 -I'll wait in the car. -Yeah. 1110 01:04:05,283 --> 01:04:06,843 You got together with Legolas? 1111 01:04:06,923 --> 01:04:08,643 Cool. Since when? 1112 01:04:08,723 --> 01:04:09,603 A while now. 1113 01:04:10,163 --> 01:04:11,803 I didn't know. 1114 01:04:12,323 --> 01:04:15,723 Because you only ever talk about your life and never ask about mine. 1115 01:04:16,603 --> 01:04:18,083 Okay, sorry. 1116 01:04:18,723 --> 01:04:19,843 When will you be back? 1117 01:04:21,523 --> 01:04:22,563 Never. 1118 01:04:24,603 --> 01:04:27,843 I'll stop by later this week to pick up the rest of my stuff. 1119 01:04:27,923 --> 01:04:31,283 -I've given the landlord notice. -What? 1120 01:04:32,323 --> 01:04:35,323 I'll help you rent out the room again. 1121 01:04:36,523 --> 01:04:40,203 There's no need. I can afford this place now. 1122 01:04:43,283 --> 01:04:44,203 Bye. 1123 01:04:58,843 --> 01:05:00,763 Be-wild herbal tea. 1124 01:05:00,843 --> 01:05:04,563 I'm delighted to be collaborating with Nuova Vita Herbal Tea. 1125 01:05:04,643 --> 01:05:08,003 This herbal tea is amazing, slimming and delicious. 1126 01:05:08,083 --> 01:05:12,163 It's plastic-free. The bottle is made of glass and bamboo. 1127 01:05:12,243 --> 01:05:13,923 Swipe up to find out more! 1128 01:05:36,243 --> 01:05:38,963 Could you like our Page when you have time? 1129 01:05:39,043 --> 01:05:40,203 Welcome. Allow me. 1130 01:05:40,283 --> 01:05:41,323 My phone is dead. 1131 01:05:41,403 --> 01:05:45,403 It only takes a minute. Easy Edizioni, you can't go wrong. 1132 01:05:45,483 --> 01:05:46,643 I'll take a look later. 1133 01:05:46,723 --> 01:05:48,963 -We have thousands of followers. -Hello! 1134 01:05:49,043 --> 01:05:51,443 You can give us a like, 1135 01:05:51,523 --> 01:05:53,923 -and unlike us if we're not for you. -Excuse me. 1136 01:05:54,843 --> 01:05:56,723 Why don't you answer my messages? 1137 01:05:58,323 --> 01:06:00,123 Because... 1138 01:06:00,203 --> 01:06:01,603 Wait here. 1139 01:06:01,683 --> 01:06:03,643 -I'll get you a drink. -Okay. 1140 01:06:06,203 --> 01:06:11,003 I just want to repay you with the classic invitation to dinner? 1141 01:06:11,083 --> 01:06:13,483 -I eat a lot. -So do I. 1142 01:06:14,763 --> 01:06:17,643 What is with the fake laughter? 1143 01:06:18,563 --> 01:06:20,963 Right now, I'm craving cherries. 1144 01:06:22,083 --> 01:06:23,843 You aren't interested in this guy at all. 1145 01:06:29,883 --> 01:06:33,083 Are you trying to make Donato jealous? 1146 01:06:33,163 --> 01:06:34,443 You're pathetic. 1147 01:06:34,803 --> 01:06:36,803 We're ready for the toast, guys. Follow me. 1148 01:06:39,323 --> 01:06:41,483 Text me. I'll answer this time. 1149 01:06:44,843 --> 01:06:46,963 -Can I take a selfie with you? -Sure. 1150 01:06:50,683 --> 01:06:52,283 -Thank you so much! -No problem. 1151 01:06:53,043 --> 01:06:56,403 LEONARDO: BLACK SHEEP, AUDITION IN AN HOUR. COUNTING ON YOU! 1152 01:06:56,483 --> 01:06:58,643 -Can I take a selfie with you? -Sure. 1153 01:06:58,723 --> 01:06:59,563 Thanks. 1154 01:07:01,563 --> 01:07:04,443 -Thank you! -Speech! 1155 01:07:04,523 --> 01:07:07,123 -Thanks. -Speech! 1156 01:07:07,203 --> 01:07:09,683 Speech! 1157 01:07:09,763 --> 01:07:11,083 Hello, everyone. 1158 01:07:11,163 --> 01:07:13,683 I'm not very good at speeches. 1159 01:07:13,763 --> 01:07:15,603 I'm much better at making videos. 1160 01:07:15,683 --> 01:07:17,883 But I'd like to take advantage of the launch 1161 01:07:17,963 --> 01:07:20,243 of this beauty line that was made so thoughtfully, 1162 01:07:20,323 --> 01:07:22,363 to speak to you from my heart. 1163 01:07:22,443 --> 01:07:25,083 I've always shared everything with my fans. 1164 01:07:25,963 --> 01:07:27,123 Except this. 1165 01:07:29,523 --> 01:07:31,443 Wow. Okay. 1166 01:07:35,123 --> 01:07:36,643 Free at last. 1167 01:07:39,603 --> 01:07:41,363 My love. 1168 01:07:41,443 --> 01:07:42,923 Wait, that's enough. 1169 01:07:43,003 --> 01:07:46,363 We work together, Erika. I'm not sure we should do this. 1170 01:07:46,443 --> 01:07:47,283 No? 1171 01:07:47,923 --> 01:07:48,883 You're fired. 1172 01:07:52,403 --> 01:07:53,963 Let's raise a toast! 1173 01:07:54,043 --> 01:07:55,843 Now that's a genuine relationship. 1174 01:08:02,723 --> 01:08:06,443 Can I buy you a drink or do you only accept them from VIPs? 1175 01:08:07,643 --> 01:08:09,163 You'll have to catch me first. 1176 01:08:13,803 --> 01:08:15,603 You know I love a good challenge. 1177 01:08:16,923 --> 01:08:18,643 I know he's married! 1178 01:08:21,482 --> 01:08:23,482 Why not find yourself a single guy? 1179 01:08:23,563 --> 01:08:25,362 People are so greedy. 1180 01:08:30,683 --> 01:08:32,283 Maddalena, not him. 1181 01:08:34,123 --> 01:08:35,603 Let's get out of here. 1182 01:08:36,083 --> 01:08:37,163 Let's go to my place. 1183 01:08:38,123 --> 01:08:39,283 What about your wife? 1184 01:08:40,482 --> 01:08:41,442 She left. 1185 01:08:50,763 --> 01:08:52,083 Everything okay in there? 1186 01:08:52,163 --> 01:08:53,643 Yes, I'm fine. 1187 01:09:11,283 --> 01:09:13,683 I can't believe we're doing this again. 1188 01:09:13,763 --> 01:09:14,803 God. 1189 01:09:14,883 --> 01:09:16,043 You taught me all this. 1190 01:09:16,123 --> 01:09:19,603 To be sexy and take who I want. To be the subject, not an object. 1191 01:09:19,683 --> 01:09:22,683 I didn't teach you to self-sabotage! 1192 01:09:22,763 --> 01:09:23,923 Get out there. 1193 01:09:24,003 --> 01:09:25,123 Out! 1194 01:09:28,402 --> 01:09:30,563 -Get in. -What is this? 1195 01:09:30,643 --> 01:09:33,283 -Get inside! -Not again! 1196 01:09:33,362 --> 01:09:34,482 Fine. 1197 01:09:37,643 --> 01:09:39,803 Look what your self-esteem has become. 1198 01:09:39,883 --> 01:09:41,923 -It looks beautiful. -It's a cage. 1199 01:09:42,003 --> 01:09:44,643 No place is beautiful when there's no way out. 1200 01:09:45,243 --> 01:09:48,043 Your self-esteem depends on other people's opinions. 1201 01:09:48,123 --> 01:09:49,963 I'm a role model for many people. 1202 01:09:50,043 --> 01:09:52,003 Except for yourself, Maddalena. 1203 01:09:53,003 --> 01:09:55,843 What's bothering you so much? 1204 01:09:55,923 --> 01:09:58,963 The fact that you haven't grasped the most important lesson of all! 1205 01:09:59,043 --> 01:10:03,323 You don't need other people's approval, you only need your own. 1206 01:10:09,323 --> 01:10:10,203 You're afraid. 1207 01:10:11,763 --> 01:10:12,763 Of what? 1208 01:10:12,843 --> 01:10:13,963 Of me being happy. 1209 01:10:14,603 --> 01:10:15,483 That's right. 1210 01:10:15,563 --> 01:10:18,683 If I'm happy, I won't need you anymore. 1211 01:10:19,163 --> 01:10:21,083 And you'll vanish. 1212 01:10:45,043 --> 01:10:46,603 LEONARDO: WHERE ARE YOU? 1213 01:10:59,043 --> 01:10:59,963 Finally. 1214 01:11:01,243 --> 01:11:02,403 What? 1215 01:11:02,483 --> 01:11:04,043 You seem different. 1216 01:11:04,123 --> 01:11:05,243 You're... 1217 01:11:07,123 --> 01:11:08,283 more sure of yourself. 1218 01:11:10,043 --> 01:11:11,283 Free of your inhibitions. 1219 01:11:13,403 --> 01:11:15,083 Now you know what you want. 1220 01:11:17,243 --> 01:11:19,363 You're right, I do. 1221 01:11:21,883 --> 01:11:23,363 Wait here. 1222 01:11:23,443 --> 01:11:24,683 I want to celebrate. 1223 01:11:34,803 --> 01:11:38,523 I want to raise a glass to you. You've finally realized your worth. 1224 01:11:42,603 --> 01:11:45,443 -Didn't you say your wife left? -Yes. 1225 01:11:45,523 --> 01:11:47,483 For a weekend with her girlfriends. 1226 01:11:55,083 --> 01:11:56,163 What are you doing? 1227 01:11:56,883 --> 01:12:01,043 Once you realize you deserve better, you'll wonder how you settled for so long. 1228 01:12:01,123 --> 01:12:03,123 Aren't you tired of living like this? 1229 01:12:03,203 --> 01:12:05,043 I honestly feel sorry for you, Donato. 1230 01:12:05,483 --> 01:12:09,083 Because, deep down, you're better than all of this. 1231 01:12:11,043 --> 01:12:11,883 But... 1232 01:12:21,203 --> 01:12:23,683 -You did well. -The others were worse. 1233 01:12:23,763 --> 01:12:25,163 -Thanks. -No problem. 1234 01:12:25,243 --> 01:12:26,963 -Thank you. Bye. -We're leaving. 1235 01:12:27,043 --> 01:12:28,283 -Hi. -See you! 1236 01:12:28,363 --> 01:12:30,203 How did it go? Did you kill it? 1237 01:12:30,283 --> 01:12:32,763 No. It hasn't been a great night. 1238 01:12:33,483 --> 01:12:35,643 -Why not? -It happens. 1239 01:12:36,363 --> 01:12:38,123 The audience was off. 1240 01:12:38,203 --> 01:12:41,843 Sometimes a joke that has always worked fails to land. 1241 01:12:44,003 --> 01:12:45,963 I'm sorry I didn't get here on time. 1242 01:12:48,403 --> 01:12:51,163 I was silly to text you while you were at the party. 1243 01:12:52,163 --> 01:12:53,403 I saw your Stories. 1244 01:12:55,163 --> 01:12:56,763 I still hoped you'd show up. 1245 01:12:57,883 --> 01:13:00,443 Because two black sheep can make their own flock. 1246 01:13:03,843 --> 01:13:06,723 You're not a black sheep anymore though, are you? 1247 01:13:11,763 --> 01:13:15,043 Shall we grab a beer? 1248 01:13:15,123 --> 01:13:17,603 We could take a walk, just the two of us. 1249 01:13:21,603 --> 01:13:22,883 It's late, Maddalena. 1250 01:14:27,563 --> 01:14:28,643 PLEASE HIM!!! ENTER 1251 01:14:28,723 --> 01:14:30,203 VALENTINA NAPPI'S SECRETS 1252 01:15:05,203 --> 01:15:07,083 Valentina, where are you? 1253 01:15:18,043 --> 01:15:20,483 MOM: MARIA IS IN LABOR! 1254 01:15:35,243 --> 01:15:36,083 Madda. 1255 01:15:42,243 --> 01:15:44,683 WELCOME ALDO 1256 01:15:44,763 --> 01:15:46,003 She named him after Dad! 1257 01:15:46,923 --> 01:15:48,923 It was a surprise for me too. 1258 01:15:50,763 --> 01:15:52,363 -Sister-in-law! -Congratulations. 1259 01:15:52,963 --> 01:15:53,843 Thanks. 1260 01:15:53,923 --> 01:15:55,643 Maria and little Aldo are resting. 1261 01:15:55,723 --> 01:15:57,763 I'm going to Mom's to pick up Enrico. 1262 01:15:57,843 --> 01:16:00,243 I'll try and squeeze in a shower, too. Later! 1263 01:16:00,323 --> 01:16:01,563 -Bye. -Bye. 1264 01:16:04,643 --> 01:16:08,243 -You should get some rest too. -I wouldn't be able to sleep. 1265 01:16:08,323 --> 01:16:11,083 -Too anxious? -Too happy. 1266 01:16:12,003 --> 01:16:14,043 That's what a mother's life is like. 1267 01:16:14,963 --> 01:16:18,003 Sometimes it's joy, sometimes it's sorrow. 1268 01:16:22,083 --> 01:16:23,763 I'm sorry, Mom. 1269 01:16:23,843 --> 01:16:26,763 -I was a bitch. -Watch your language, Madda! 1270 01:16:26,843 --> 01:16:29,963 -I can call myself a bitch! -You're not though. 1271 01:16:31,083 --> 01:16:32,883 Yet I'm never good enough for you. 1272 01:16:32,963 --> 01:16:36,043 What's not good enough is seeing you unhappy. 1273 01:16:36,123 --> 01:16:38,763 It's a sin, how little you believe in yourself. 1274 01:16:38,843 --> 01:16:41,523 So every now and then, I try to give you advice. 1275 01:16:44,843 --> 01:16:47,483 -Every now and then? -Yes, every now... 1276 01:16:47,563 --> 01:16:49,163 Every... 1277 01:16:49,243 --> 01:16:51,123 Every so often. 1278 01:16:54,083 --> 01:16:56,283 Do you ever think that your idea of happiness 1279 01:16:56,363 --> 01:16:57,883 may be different from mine? 1280 01:17:00,603 --> 01:17:02,843 It's the only one I know. 1281 01:17:03,723 --> 01:17:06,523 All my life, I've been a mother... 1282 01:17:06,603 --> 01:17:09,443 It wasn't easy raising you all by myself. 1283 01:17:10,323 --> 01:17:14,403 I was terrified that the world would not be kind to you. 1284 01:17:14,483 --> 01:17:16,283 You're too sensitive, Madda. 1285 01:17:22,123 --> 01:17:24,523 -You did great. -Well... 1286 01:17:26,563 --> 01:17:28,283 I'll never be like you and Maria, 1287 01:17:29,203 --> 01:17:31,483 but now I know that being myself is fine too. 1288 01:17:34,283 --> 01:17:38,363 I'm proud of you, and everything that you're doing. 1289 01:17:39,203 --> 01:17:41,043 I'm sorry if I never told you that. 1290 01:17:41,683 --> 01:17:44,963 I'm not brave. But you... you're perfect. 1291 01:17:45,763 --> 01:17:47,683 You're perfect the way you are, Madda. 1292 01:17:52,603 --> 01:17:54,643 Of course I am. I'm your daughter. 1293 01:17:56,723 --> 01:17:57,643 Indeed. 1294 01:18:04,683 --> 01:18:05,563 Want a sandwich? 1295 01:18:06,323 --> 01:18:07,163 All right. 1296 01:18:07,923 --> 01:18:09,843 A midnight sandwich. 1297 01:18:11,203 --> 01:18:12,203 Look. 1298 01:18:12,283 --> 01:18:15,603 -Father Massimo, at this hour! -Grazia. 1299 01:18:15,683 --> 01:18:17,923 -For our grandson, this and more. -Yes... 1300 01:18:18,603 --> 01:18:20,003 -Coffee? -Yeah. 1301 01:18:20,763 --> 01:18:22,643 We'll go find the vending machine. 1302 01:18:27,083 --> 01:18:29,883 Vale, I think you were right about my mom and the vicar. 1303 01:18:35,043 --> 01:18:37,603 What's this delicious smell of ham? 1304 01:18:43,843 --> 01:18:45,283 So good. 1305 01:18:45,363 --> 01:18:48,003 I've dreamed of nothing else for nine months. 1306 01:18:48,763 --> 01:18:50,723 Where did you get it, at this hour? 1307 01:18:50,803 --> 01:18:52,723 The 24/7 supermarket. 1308 01:18:52,803 --> 01:18:54,003 You can't imagine. 1309 01:18:54,083 --> 01:18:56,443 It was packed with kids with the munchies. 1310 01:18:56,523 --> 01:18:57,443 Lucky them. 1311 01:18:58,843 --> 01:19:02,003 You get the munchies after smoking weed. 1312 01:19:02,883 --> 01:19:05,003 I know, that's why I said "lucky them"! 1313 01:19:05,083 --> 01:19:06,363 Are you crazy? 1314 01:19:07,203 --> 01:19:09,883 You think I've never smoked a joint? 1315 01:19:09,963 --> 01:19:11,283 You? No way... 1316 01:19:13,043 --> 01:19:15,323 -When I was young. -You are young. 1317 01:19:15,403 --> 01:19:17,523 You're no longer young when you have a kid. 1318 01:19:17,603 --> 01:19:19,043 Never mind two kids. 1319 01:19:20,363 --> 01:19:21,363 He's so cute. 1320 01:19:21,963 --> 01:19:25,123 Look how cute he is, sleeping away. 1321 01:19:25,803 --> 01:19:27,883 He's got an old man's name. Aldo. 1322 01:19:27,963 --> 01:19:30,243 But it was Dad's name, so... 1323 01:19:30,323 --> 01:19:31,443 Mommy's here. 1324 01:19:32,683 --> 01:19:34,323 You'll be a super-mom to him too. 1325 01:19:36,563 --> 01:19:37,763 I don't know. 1326 01:19:37,843 --> 01:19:42,003 Have you ever thought about the fact that the Virgin Mary only had one kid? 1327 01:19:42,723 --> 01:19:44,403 It must mean something. 1328 01:19:44,483 --> 01:19:45,643 Of course. 1329 01:21:13,723 --> 01:21:15,803 He likes dolls. 1330 01:21:15,883 --> 01:21:19,043 Enrico, give me the doll. 1331 01:21:19,123 --> 01:21:22,483 -Cut it out, Mom. -You should play with... Give me the doll! 1332 01:21:22,563 --> 01:21:24,443 Who cares what he plays with. 1333 01:21:24,563 --> 01:21:26,083 Come! Let's go to your aunt! 1334 01:21:26,163 --> 01:21:27,243 Hi! 1335 01:21:27,323 --> 01:21:28,763 Here he is! 1336 01:21:28,843 --> 01:21:31,523 No, no, no. 1337 01:21:31,603 --> 01:21:34,323 -Isn't he cute? -It's kind of hot in here. 1338 01:21:34,403 --> 01:21:35,883 Go, please. 1339 01:21:35,963 --> 01:21:37,603 -Yeah. -Keep an eye on him. 1340 01:21:38,083 --> 01:21:40,083 -Be careful! -I will be. Go! 1341 01:21:40,163 --> 01:21:42,043 Behave, darling, okay? 1342 01:21:43,603 --> 01:21:44,883 You'll regret this. 1343 01:21:45,443 --> 01:21:46,563 I don't think so. 1344 01:21:50,283 --> 01:21:51,563 -Tommaso! -Yes, ma'am. 1345 01:22:13,563 --> 01:22:15,843 ...they are not influencers. 1346 01:22:15,923 --> 01:22:18,403 If they were, they'd promote herbal tea. 1347 01:22:18,483 --> 01:22:21,523 That is, they'd sell their soul to the devil. 1348 01:22:21,603 --> 01:22:23,923 No. They're lawyers. 1349 01:22:24,003 --> 01:22:27,083 They're professionals, freelancers! 1350 01:22:38,723 --> 01:22:44,723 DI VAIO: I'M INVITING YOU TO DINNER, LET'S SEE IF YOU'LL ANSWER THIS TIME... 1351 01:22:45,483 --> 01:22:49,603 OF COURSE, BUT WILL YOU FORGIVE ME IF I'M NOT COMING? 1352 01:22:49,683 --> 01:22:54,003 MY HEAD IS... ELSEWHERE. 1353 01:23:06,923 --> 01:23:10,043 MADDALENA GENTILI MY SELF-ESTEEM IS AN EMPTY ROOM 1354 01:23:10,803 --> 01:23:12,883 TO THE BLACK SHEEP 1355 01:23:16,403 --> 01:23:17,483 Hello. 1356 01:23:17,563 --> 01:23:18,683 -Hello. -Hello. 1357 01:23:18,763 --> 01:23:22,883 Some of you know me personally, and others because of that viral video. 1358 01:23:22,963 --> 01:23:25,563 It's strange being a meme. 1359 01:23:25,643 --> 01:23:28,923 Especially after spending my life running away from my appearance. 1360 01:23:29,003 --> 01:23:31,883 Suddenly I'm everywhere, even on strangers' phones in the subway. 1361 01:23:31,963 --> 01:23:35,243 My mother even shared the video in our parish's group chat. 1362 01:23:35,323 --> 01:23:36,643 I'm not joking. 1363 01:23:37,483 --> 01:23:40,003 A year ago, I would have introduced myself like this: 1364 01:23:40,083 --> 01:23:44,843 "My name is Maddalena, I'm 30 years old, and I don't like anything about myself." 1365 01:23:45,323 --> 01:23:46,323 But not today. 1366 01:23:47,323 --> 01:23:49,963 Because at some point, things change. 1367 01:23:51,283 --> 01:23:52,723 Or perhaps, we change. 1368 01:23:52,803 --> 01:23:55,723 And our self-esteem begins to blossom. 1369 01:24:03,083 --> 01:24:06,403 In this book, you'll meet the many people who helped me 1370 01:24:06,483 --> 01:24:09,123 fill up the bare room that was my self-esteem. 1371 01:24:13,843 --> 01:24:18,083 Among them is the funniest guy I've ever met. 1372 01:24:18,163 --> 01:24:19,883 He laughs at my jokes, 1373 01:24:19,963 --> 01:24:22,963 smokes tons of weed and will never hold down a serious job. 1374 01:24:23,043 --> 01:24:24,523 He helped me a lot. 1375 01:24:24,603 --> 01:24:27,483 Helped me understand that I want a guy who can really see me, 1376 01:24:27,563 --> 01:24:29,643 even though I've been hiding my whole life. 1377 01:24:30,483 --> 01:24:34,203 A guy who'll love me when I hate myself, even when I stay in my pajamas 1378 01:24:34,283 --> 01:24:36,563 three days straight watching porn. 1379 01:24:36,643 --> 01:24:37,963 Sorry, Mom. 1380 01:24:38,043 --> 01:24:40,363 A guy who believes in me more than I believe in myself. 1381 01:24:40,443 --> 01:24:42,243 Who pushes me to do things 1382 01:24:42,323 --> 01:24:45,683 I would never have the guts to do like write this book 1383 01:24:45,763 --> 01:24:47,203 and get up on this stage. 1384 01:24:47,283 --> 01:24:51,963 And since we're on the subject, will you have a beer with me later? 1385 01:24:52,043 --> 01:24:54,363 Because I like you. A lot. 1386 01:24:54,443 --> 01:24:55,763 More than Father Pius. 1387 01:24:57,323 --> 01:24:59,203 And because you're right. 1388 01:24:59,283 --> 01:25:01,523 Two black sheep make their own flock. 1389 01:25:08,803 --> 01:25:09,803 Thank you. 1390 01:25:12,003 --> 01:25:12,843 Hey. 1391 01:25:15,243 --> 01:25:16,123 Hey! 1392 01:25:40,283 --> 01:25:42,763 -I can't do it. -Go to the bathroom. Go! 1393 01:25:57,883 --> 01:25:59,643 Are they... 1394 01:25:59,723 --> 01:26:01,043 Remember us? 1395 01:26:05,243 --> 01:26:07,003 -Do you want... -Are you stupid? 1396 01:26:07,123 --> 01:26:08,243 We don't need a third. 1397 01:26:29,763 --> 01:26:30,923 You messed up my hair. 1398 01:26:34,963 --> 01:26:35,963 No... 1399 01:26:37,203 --> 01:26:39,963 -What's wrong? -Nothing, it's amazing, but... 1400 01:26:40,043 --> 01:26:41,443 You're crying. 1401 01:26:41,523 --> 01:26:44,283 Yes. No, but... 1402 01:26:44,363 --> 01:26:48,483 It's amazing. I don't know, this has never happened to me before... 1403 01:26:48,563 --> 01:26:50,843 -You cry when you orgasm. -Maybe. 1404 01:26:51,763 --> 01:26:53,043 I laugh. 1405 01:26:54,083 --> 01:26:55,043 Yeah! 1406 01:26:59,523 --> 01:27:00,483 I'm thirsty. 1407 01:27:00,963 --> 01:27:02,563 I'm really thirsty. 1408 01:27:09,723 --> 01:27:12,083 Madda. Lesson number 10. 1409 01:27:12,163 --> 01:27:16,563 When you're in love, don't forget about the sex. 1410 01:27:16,643 --> 01:27:17,723 Okay. 1411 01:27:18,563 --> 01:27:19,643 You look beautiful. 1412 01:27:21,003 --> 01:27:23,563 -How about another round? -That would be three. 1413 01:27:24,283 --> 01:27:25,843 Four, actually. 1414 01:27:29,203 --> 01:27:31,723 Well, one more is good. 1415 01:28:09,963 --> 01:28:12,203 STILL FABULOUS 1416 01:28:18,723 --> 01:28:19,563 Thank you. 1417 01:28:19,643 --> 01:28:22,483 -I love your movies. Can I take a selfie? -Of course. 1418 01:28:24,363 --> 01:28:26,043 -Thanks. Bye. -No problem. Bye! 1419 01:28:27,003 --> 01:28:27,963 Hello. 1420 01:28:28,043 --> 01:28:29,163 Vale! 1421 01:28:29,243 --> 01:28:32,083 -Hi! -Get in line like everyone else, please. 1422 01:28:32,163 --> 01:28:35,523 No, I know her! Vale, it's me, Maddalena! 1423 01:28:35,603 --> 01:28:38,963 You've stopped showing up because you don't think I need you. 1424 01:28:39,043 --> 01:28:40,763 Don't be silly. I miss you, Vale! 1425 01:28:40,843 --> 01:28:42,163 -Let me go! -Who's this nutjob? 1426 01:28:42,243 --> 01:28:43,483 Please do something. 1427 01:28:43,563 --> 01:28:46,083 Vale, we came to this store together! 1428 01:28:46,163 --> 01:28:47,403 Don't you remember? 1429 01:28:47,483 --> 01:28:50,123 -Vale, please! -I don't know her. 1430 01:28:51,683 --> 01:28:53,763 I haven't fucked her, either. 1431 01:28:53,843 --> 01:28:55,483 At least, I don't think I have.