1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.BZ 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.BZ 3 00:00:51,510 --> 00:00:54,513 [♪ soft upbeat music playing] 4 00:02:24,311 --> 00:02:27,271 - [phone chiming] - Send text to Tyler. 5 00:02:27,272 --> 00:02:28,939 [automated voice] What would you like to say? 6 00:02:28,940 --> 00:02:30,274 Hi, exclamation point. 7 00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:32,234 I just arrived, exclamation point. 8 00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:34,820 - [phone chiming] - Your message to Tyler says, 9 00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:36,280 "Hi! I just arrived!" 10 00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:37,782 - Send. - Okay. 11 00:02:37,783 --> 00:02:39,200 - [text whooshing] - Message sent. 12 00:02:39,201 --> 00:02:40,619 - [pen scribbling] - [phone chiming] 13 00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:44,330 Tyler says, "Glad you arrived safely." 14 00:02:44,331 --> 00:02:47,500 - Would you like to reply? - [phone chiming] 15 00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:50,294 Tyler says, "Thank you again for being there." 16 00:02:50,295 --> 00:02:52,797 [phone chiming] 17 00:02:52,798 --> 00:02:55,299 Tyler says, "I'm so grateful for you." 18 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:57,343 - Would you like to reply? - No. 19 00:02:57,344 --> 00:02:58,845 - [phone chiming] - Okay. 20 00:03:08,814 --> 00:03:10,982 [dog barking] 21 00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:12,984 [growling] 22 00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,737 [dog continues barking] 23 00:03:23,578 --> 00:03:25,247 - [hawk screeching] - [dog shrieks] 24 00:03:37,551 --> 00:03:38,552 [gate opening] 25 00:03:44,099 --> 00:03:46,101 [suitcase wheels rattling] 26 00:03:50,439 --> 00:03:51,857 [knocking] 27 00:03:55,193 --> 00:03:56,778 [exhales sharply] 28 00:04:00,031 --> 00:04:01,867 [knocking] 29 00:04:08,373 --> 00:04:10,125 - [one knock] - Oh! Hey, hello. 30 00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,712 - Hi, Mrs. Patterson, I'm-- - This plant shouldn't be dying. 31 00:04:14,713 --> 00:04:17,047 I just bought it two weeks ago. It's unbelievable. 32 00:04:17,048 --> 00:04:19,550 All the leaves keep falling off. 33 00:04:19,551 --> 00:04:20,634 Should I come in? 34 00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:22,553 Well, I didn't slam the door on you. 35 00:04:22,554 --> 00:04:23,971 It's a succulent, for God's sake. 36 00:04:23,972 --> 00:04:25,306 Shouldn't be dying. 37 00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:26,892 I've done nothing wrong, that's for sure. 38 00:04:28,435 --> 00:04:30,394 We take our shoes off in this house. 39 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:32,646 - Sorry. - Everything out there is dirt. 40 00:04:32,647 --> 00:04:35,065 Yeah, a-and cold. [chuckles] 41 00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:37,568 Where is that "dry heat" you hear so much about? 42 00:04:37,569 --> 00:04:40,404 - What was your name again? - Jamie. 43 00:04:40,405 --> 00:04:42,406 Here, we say our first and last name. 44 00:04:42,407 --> 00:04:43,991 Sorry. Jamie Simms. 45 00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:46,410 Well, I'll probably have to ask you your name again. 46 00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:48,329 Just know that. I can't apologize for it. 47 00:04:48,330 --> 00:04:50,581 I've got a lot going on. And now, with you here. 48 00:04:50,582 --> 00:04:53,417 I completely understan... d. 49 00:04:53,418 --> 00:04:54,836 [sighs] 50 00:04:55,504 --> 00:04:57,506 [birds cawing] 51 00:05:00,091 --> 00:05:03,093 I'm sorry, I wasn't sure if you wanted me to follow you. 52 00:05:03,094 --> 00:05:05,513 - I don't know what's happening. - [sighs] I know. 53 00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:08,642 - It's a very unusual situation. - It's all starting to rot. 54 00:05:10,185 --> 00:05:11,186 [sighs] 55 00:05:12,771 --> 00:05:14,481 It's possible it's being overwatered. 56 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:18,443 [sighs] 57 00:05:19,611 --> 00:05:21,779 - It could also be under-watered, so that's-- - I'll tell you one thing 58 00:05:21,780 --> 00:05:23,864 I did do wrong. I trusted Doris Kato. 59 00:05:23,865 --> 00:05:26,617 Friend from New York. She raved about this nursery, 60 00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:28,828 which, of course, she did. Her cousin opened it. 61 00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:31,705 A cousin, by the way, no one's ever even heard of until now. 62 00:05:31,706 --> 00:05:34,333 A Sue or a Veronica or Patty. I don't fucking know. 63 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,794 I wasn't listening. She went on and on and on. 64 00:05:36,795 --> 00:05:39,797 "I'm so proud of my cousin. She's starting over. 65 00:05:39,798 --> 00:05:42,049 We should really support her." 66 00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:45,052 Well, I'm sorry, but clearly, Sue-Veronica-Patty 67 00:05:45,053 --> 00:05:46,971 needs to start over again. 68 00:05:46,972 --> 00:05:48,472 Well, I can take it back if you'd like. 69 00:05:48,473 --> 00:05:49,474 Why? 70 00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:53,477 - If you're not happy. - Are you already on the clock? 71 00:05:53,478 --> 00:05:55,646 - Is that how this works? - [scoffs] No, I just-- 72 00:05:55,647 --> 00:05:58,148 I'm gonna save it. It's dying, not dead. 73 00:05:58,149 --> 00:05:59,401 It can be saved. 74 00:06:00,819 --> 00:06:03,028 I'm gonna make a cocktail. I need one. 75 00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:04,321 Can I pour you something? 76 00:06:04,322 --> 00:06:06,782 - Um... - Yeah, it's early. 77 00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:08,492 Oh, no, that's not what I meant. I just-- I'm-- 78 00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:10,911 I'm just not much of a drinker, actually. 79 00:06:10,912 --> 00:06:12,663 But thank you. I had a-- 80 00:06:12,664 --> 00:06:14,707 had an incident in college. 81 00:06:14,708 --> 00:06:15,834 [freezer banging, ice rattling] 82 00:06:16,668 --> 00:06:19,212 - [ice clinking] - [drawer closing] 83 00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,673 - Yeah, I broke my jaw. - [cork popping] 84 00:06:22,674 --> 00:06:24,341 Just completely tanked 85 00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:26,927 on Long Island iced teas. [chuckles] 86 00:06:26,928 --> 00:06:29,013 I blacked out right onto the sidewalk. 87 00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:32,182 I had to have my jaw wired shut for over a month. 88 00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:34,768 - [exhales] - So, any of the smells of the numerous alcohols 89 00:06:34,769 --> 00:06:37,104 in a Long Island are a bit of a trigger for me. 90 00:06:37,105 --> 00:06:38,689 Are you triggered by the smell of water? 91 00:06:38,690 --> 00:06:40,066 Because that's all I have. 92 00:06:41,693 --> 00:06:43,028 Or Pedialyte. 93 00:06:43,778 --> 00:06:46,238 Well, I've never been one to turn down a Pedialyte. [chuckles] 94 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,949 Blueberry or unflavored? 95 00:06:50,785 --> 00:06:52,369 Water's awesome. 96 00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:54,413 So, how long will you be here? 97 00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:56,875 It depends. Uh, a few days, maybe a week. 98 00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:59,376 That's "a few days, maybe a week"? 99 00:06:59,377 --> 00:07:01,129 Well, for a gay man, yes. [chuckles] 100 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:04,215 I wasn't expecting to-- to come here. 101 00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:07,551 None of this was expected. 102 00:07:07,552 --> 00:07:09,596 Oh, no. I'm sorry, I didn't... 103 00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:13,307 Um, I was packed for a different trip, 104 00:07:13,308 --> 00:07:15,643 for-- for a longer trip when your son called. 105 00:07:15,644 --> 00:07:19,271 So then, this trip got tacked on to-- to that trip. 106 00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:22,107 And you're driving for that trip and this trip? 107 00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:23,567 Yeah, I prefer it. 108 00:07:23,568 --> 00:07:25,235 You know, time alone, time to think. 109 00:07:25,236 --> 00:07:26,821 I like a road trip. 110 00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:29,741 Oh, God. 111 00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:35,080 - I have more socks. - You think they made the cut? 112 00:07:44,756 --> 00:07:46,507 - [bag unzipping] - [Jamie] Yeah, I, uh, 113 00:07:46,508 --> 00:07:48,509 I love a road trip. 114 00:07:48,510 --> 00:07:52,262 It's a great way to, uh, to see New Mexico. 115 00:07:52,263 --> 00:07:56,350 It's my first time, actually. It's so beautiful. 116 00:07:56,351 --> 00:07:58,602 But it is funny, you know? You see the desert landscape, 117 00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:01,105 and you just assume, well, that's gonna be hot-- 118 00:08:01,106 --> 00:08:02,983 So, how does this work? You, here? 119 00:08:03,942 --> 00:08:05,442 Um, however you'd like it. 120 00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:06,777 No, I didn't ask for any of this. 121 00:08:06,778 --> 00:08:08,779 So, it's not "however." You tell me. 122 00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:10,781 Uh, I'm-- I'm just here to help. 123 00:08:10,782 --> 00:08:12,324 Me grieve? 124 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:14,284 No. No, I couldn't possibly. 125 00:08:14,285 --> 00:08:16,871 No, you couldn't. I'm more than capable. 126 00:08:17,622 --> 00:08:19,623 I just meant I could help, um, 127 00:08:19,624 --> 00:08:22,292 with arrangements, um, running errands. 128 00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:25,045 - I think Tyler was thinking-- - Yes, what was my son thinking, 129 00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:26,714 sending you in his place? 130 00:08:26,715 --> 00:08:28,466 I think Tyler's worried about you. 131 00:08:34,139 --> 00:08:35,849 I thought you'd be better at that. 132 00:08:37,308 --> 00:08:39,143 Lying. 133 00:08:39,144 --> 00:08:41,229 Isn't that what assistants do best? 134 00:08:42,397 --> 00:08:44,982 - He is worried. - Fine. He's worried. 135 00:08:44,983 --> 00:08:46,400 And you know he would be here in a heartbeat 136 00:08:46,401 --> 00:08:47,651 if he wasn't stuck overseas doing-- 137 00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:49,319 Overseas doing research for the new book. 138 00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:51,321 Yes, that much I learned in his texts to me, 139 00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:53,657 along with his condolences for my husband, 140 00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:55,993 and regrets that he might not be able to make it back for the funeral. 141 00:08:55,994 --> 00:08:59,413 And then, two days ago, I learned that his assistant 142 00:08:59,414 --> 00:09:02,332 would be here in his absence, in a text from you. 143 00:09:02,333 --> 00:09:03,834 Y-Yes, that is on me. 144 00:09:03,835 --> 00:09:05,669 I told Tyler I would reach out, and I-- 145 00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:07,588 and I should have let him do that first. 146 00:09:07,589 --> 00:09:09,506 And why might he not make it back? 147 00:09:09,507 --> 00:09:12,843 There's a prisoner of war that he's hoping to interview, 148 00:09:12,844 --> 00:09:14,344 uh, in Khartoum. 149 00:09:14,345 --> 00:09:16,555 He has a contact, an insider 150 00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,932 in the Sudanese Armed Forces that-- 151 00:09:18,933 --> 00:09:21,769 It's timing, basically. It's-- it's about timing. 152 00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:23,729 It-- He just has to be ready for when it will be safe. 153 00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:26,273 And will it be safe before Saturday to be here? 154 00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:27,900 That's the hope, yes. That's what he's hoping. 155 00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:29,943 - Mm, that's in seven days. - Yes. 156 00:09:29,944 --> 00:09:31,196 So, we're hoping it's... 157 00:09:32,363 --> 00:09:33,739 Safe before Saturday. 158 00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:35,532 And if it doesn't become safe, 159 00:09:35,533 --> 00:09:37,535 will you be sitting beside me at the funeral? 160 00:09:39,746 --> 00:09:41,538 - Well, no. I-- I mean, I couldn't-- - Why? 161 00:09:41,539 --> 00:09:42,873 You're doing everything else for Tyler. 162 00:09:42,874 --> 00:09:45,042 Why can't you be my son on the day? 163 00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:46,585 Well, because I'm no replacement for him-- 164 00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:49,047 You'd be surprised how low that bar is. 165 00:09:52,300 --> 00:09:53,384 [sighs] 166 00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:57,055 Did you want me to get the water? 167 00:09:59,474 --> 00:10:01,392 - [sighs] - I-It's okay, no worries. 168 00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:04,561 - So, you don't want the water? - No. 169 00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:06,105 No-- I mean, yes, I do want the water. 170 00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:07,606 I just meant no worries in that... 171 00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:09,817 - [softly] Oh, my God. - ...it's okay that you forgot. 172 00:10:09,818 --> 00:10:11,652 [phone chiming] 173 00:10:11,653 --> 00:10:14,071 Sorry, I meant to put my phone on vibrate. 174 00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:16,074 [phone continues chiming] 175 00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:20,619 - Is that Tyler? - Um, most likely, yes. 176 00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,580 - [phone chimes] - Your son texts from his computer, 177 00:10:23,581 --> 00:10:26,083 so he's just constantly hitting return 178 00:10:26,084 --> 00:10:27,835 and sending one sentence at a time. 179 00:10:27,836 --> 00:10:28,837 Yes, it is him. 180 00:10:33,091 --> 00:10:35,760 Uh, he's just making sure I arrived safely. 181 00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:40,305 That's a lot of sentences for such a simple message. 182 00:10:40,306 --> 00:10:41,307 [Jamie] Uh... 183 00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,184 Uh, let's see what he says. 184 00:10:44,185 --> 00:10:45,811 - Um... - [scoffs] Forget it. 185 00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:48,147 It doesn't all have to be my business. 186 00:10:48,148 --> 00:10:49,774 But to the part that is... 187 00:10:50,817 --> 00:10:53,653 you can say that you arrived safely and that... 188 00:10:54,946 --> 00:10:56,947 I'm doing well. 189 00:10:56,948 --> 00:10:58,949 In case that's his follow-up. 190 00:10:58,950 --> 00:11:00,868 Oh, and I'll take room temp. There's no need for ice 191 00:11:00,869 --> 00:11:02,369 if the desert's not gonna be hot. 192 00:11:02,370 --> 00:11:04,163 Yes, it's winter. For God's sake, 193 00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:06,165 please stop being blown away by that. 194 00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:07,375 [phone chimes] 195 00:11:10,003 --> 00:11:11,753 He sent a heart emoji. 196 00:11:11,754 --> 00:11:14,007 Is that for you arriving safely or me doing well? 197 00:11:14,966 --> 00:11:17,384 - Imagine both. - How economical of him. 198 00:11:17,385 --> 00:11:18,636 [Jamie chuckles] 199 00:11:20,847 --> 00:11:23,140 - [phone buzzing] - I prefer you leave the chime on. 200 00:11:23,141 --> 00:11:25,393 That way I'll know when we hear from him. 201 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:28,521 Of course. 202 00:11:29,981 --> 00:11:31,357 - What? - Nothing. 203 00:11:32,483 --> 00:11:34,193 - Am I a lot? - No. 204 00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:36,528 That's a shame, 'cause I'm trying to be. 205 00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:38,822 You'll forgive me, Jamie, but I'm having a hard time 206 00:11:38,823 --> 00:11:40,324 processing your presence. 207 00:11:40,325 --> 00:11:42,826 I know, I'm just-- I'm just doing my job. 208 00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:45,537 You understand my position, yes? Why I'd be so agitated 209 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,372 to learn that I'm your job? 210 00:11:47,373 --> 00:11:50,083 No, no, I'm sorry. Being here is my job for Tyler. 211 00:11:50,084 --> 00:11:52,211 I didn't mean to imply that you're my responsibility. 212 00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:54,004 Well, Tyler seems to think differently. 213 00:11:54,005 --> 00:11:56,340 He seems to think he can pass off his responsibility 214 00:11:56,341 --> 00:11:58,467 to be here to say goodbye to his stepfather. 215 00:11:58,468 --> 00:12:00,719 Not that he ever called Henry anything but Henry, 216 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,012 let alone made an effort 217 00:12:02,013 --> 00:12:04,181 to have any kind of relationship with him. 218 00:12:04,182 --> 00:12:05,849 So, well, maybe that's it. 219 00:12:05,850 --> 00:12:07,851 Maybe that's why he doesn't feel he has a responsibility 220 00:12:07,852 --> 00:12:09,561 to be here? 221 00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:11,730 But my son does have a relationship with me, 222 00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,441 or did at one point-- a good one, 223 00:12:14,442 --> 00:12:16,068 which I think counts. 224 00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:18,696 So, there is a responsibility there to me. 225 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,490 - Tyler is doing his best. - Oh, please. 226 00:12:21,491 --> 00:12:23,492 - I think given the circumstances-- - Yes, you have to defend him. 227 00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:25,702 I get it, it's your job, but I don't, so I won't. 228 00:12:25,703 --> 00:12:27,579 Overseas is bullshit. 229 00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:29,289 My husband didn't just suddenly die. 230 00:12:29,290 --> 00:12:30,374 He had Parkinson's. 231 00:12:30,375 --> 00:12:31,541 We knew where we were headed, 232 00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:32,960 and so did Tyler. 233 00:12:32,961 --> 00:12:35,755 I actually called him two weeks ago to tell him... 234 00:12:37,882 --> 00:12:40,092 To tell his voicemail, at least. 235 00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:41,885 I told him Henry had taken a turn, 236 00:12:41,886 --> 00:12:44,721 things were complicated, and time was not on our side. 237 00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:47,933 So, again, you'll forgive me if I intend to allow myself 238 00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:50,228 some agitation and disappointment. 239 00:12:53,815 --> 00:12:55,066 [ice clinking in glass] 240 00:12:57,402 --> 00:12:59,737 I understand. I do. 241 00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:03,157 But I'm not here if you don't want me to be. 242 00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:07,744 Which is something you could have conveyed 243 00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:09,746 two days ago when I texted you. 244 00:13:09,747 --> 00:13:12,249 But that said, I am here because of Tyler, 245 00:13:12,250 --> 00:13:14,251 because he thought I might be of help. 246 00:13:14,252 --> 00:13:15,670 But if you don't want that... 247 00:13:16,504 --> 00:13:19,507 if you would like me to leave, I also understand that. 248 00:13:25,763 --> 00:13:27,265 I haven't made up my mind yet. 249 00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,142 [popping lips] 250 00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:31,352 Okay. 251 00:13:32,937 --> 00:13:33,938 So... 252 00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:37,483 how long have you been his assistant? 253 00:13:38,443 --> 00:13:40,986 Uh, going on about four years now. 254 00:13:40,987 --> 00:13:43,113 Wow. [chuckles] Obviously, I'm aware 255 00:13:43,114 --> 00:13:45,198 Tyler and I have been somewhat estranged for a while, 256 00:13:45,199 --> 00:13:47,160 but to not even know of your existence? 257 00:13:48,286 --> 00:13:51,997 Although I'm not sure that's more of a slight on me or you. 258 00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:52,999 [Jamie chuckles] 259 00:13:53,958 --> 00:13:55,459 Well, it doesn't bother me. 260 00:13:55,460 --> 00:13:56,627 How old are you? 261 00:13:58,046 --> 00:13:59,047 Forty-two. 262 00:14:00,965 --> 00:14:03,675 Four-- 46. Final answer. 263 00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:06,053 - So, older than Tyler? - Y-Yeah, it's just eight years. 264 00:14:06,054 --> 00:14:07,721 - Doesn't mean-- It's not crazy. - Of course not. 265 00:14:07,722 --> 00:14:09,806 - Is that an issue for you? - No. 266 00:14:09,807 --> 00:14:12,809 Really? Because at first, you made yourself less older. 267 00:14:12,810 --> 00:14:14,728 - Uh... - I just have to imagine 268 00:14:14,729 --> 00:14:18,315 it's an interesting dynamic for you as Tyler's assistant, 269 00:14:18,316 --> 00:14:21,735 with where he is in his life at his exact age. 270 00:14:21,736 --> 00:14:23,987 - He's very successful. - I'm-- I'm successful. 271 00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:26,907 I'm sorry, this... [laughing] this feels like an interview. 272 00:14:26,908 --> 00:14:29,159 Well, I'm being asked to spend a few days, 273 00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:31,536 maybe a week, with a complete stranger. 274 00:14:31,537 --> 00:14:33,580 I think I'm entitled to know more. 275 00:14:33,581 --> 00:14:35,916 Yeah, this is all kind of a second chapter for me. 276 00:14:35,917 --> 00:14:40,045 When I left NYU, I took a job as a copywriter, 277 00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:42,506 but I wasn't happy with anything. 278 00:14:42,507 --> 00:14:46,426 So, I decided to quit and start over in LA. 279 00:14:46,427 --> 00:14:48,095 [Mrs. Patterson] Where you took the job with Tyler. 280 00:14:48,096 --> 00:14:49,763 Um, yeah, eventually, yes. 281 00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:52,766 - Because you were a fan? - Y-Yes, but when I got to LA, 282 00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:55,268 I didn't purposely seek him out. 283 00:14:55,269 --> 00:14:58,772 We just happened to randomly bump into each other 284 00:14:58,773 --> 00:15:01,192 in West Hollywood at a bar. 285 00:15:02,527 --> 00:15:03,611 A gay bar? 286 00:15:04,362 --> 00:15:07,614 I mean, not-- not all bars in West Hollywood are gay bars. 287 00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:08,699 So, it wasn't a gay bar? 288 00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:12,536 - No, it was... - Mm-hmm. 289 00:15:12,537 --> 00:15:14,371 You know, I mentioned what brought me to LA, 290 00:15:14,372 --> 00:15:17,707 and he, you know, he mentioned being very overwhelmed 291 00:15:17,708 --> 00:15:19,627 and very inundated, and... 292 00:15:20,753 --> 00:15:22,046 I don't know, I just... 293 00:15:23,381 --> 00:15:25,382 I remember thinking that it felt like we were meeting 294 00:15:25,383 --> 00:15:26,551 for a reason. 295 00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:30,054 So, I offered myself up. As his assistant. 296 00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:32,889 So, I'm curious. 297 00:15:32,890 --> 00:15:34,767 Mm, what has Tyler said about me? 298 00:15:38,563 --> 00:15:41,065 What has Tyler said about you? 299 00:15:42,733 --> 00:15:45,153 Yes, I imagine he's mentioned me at some point. 300 00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:48,238 Yeah, no, I'm just trying to think. 301 00:15:48,239 --> 00:15:49,406 What he's said about me? 302 00:15:49,407 --> 00:15:50,949 Honestly, he doesn't really talk much about-- 303 00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:52,909 - Me? - Childhood. 304 00:15:52,910 --> 00:15:54,286 That included me. 305 00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:55,662 [sighs] Mrs. Patterson-- 306 00:15:55,663 --> 00:15:56,997 You're "46. Final answer." 307 00:15:56,998 --> 00:15:58,499 We can be at Diane. 308 00:15:59,292 --> 00:16:00,917 Diane, with all due respect-- 309 00:16:00,918 --> 00:16:02,961 He sent you here, so I have to assume 310 00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,754 - something's been said. - Okay, he said you were, 311 00:16:04,755 --> 00:16:06,423 uh, a great cook, 312 00:16:06,424 --> 00:16:09,634 a big traveler, that you like movies. 313 00:16:09,635 --> 00:16:12,512 Ooh, wow! What a vivid picture. 314 00:16:12,513 --> 00:16:14,974 So, no adjectives. Huh. 315 00:16:16,601 --> 00:16:19,561 Uh, Diane, I'm sorry, I can't. 316 00:16:19,562 --> 00:16:21,521 - [cork popping, liquid pouring] - Part of my being here, 317 00:16:21,522 --> 00:16:23,940 part of working for Tyler-- working for anybody, really, 318 00:16:23,941 --> 00:16:27,861 as an assistant, is that there has to be some sort of semblance 319 00:16:27,862 --> 00:16:29,946 of a cone of silence when it comes to stuff 320 00:16:29,947 --> 00:16:32,407 discussed about anything, 321 00:16:32,408 --> 00:16:34,159 including family. 322 00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:35,952 It's not mine to share. 323 00:16:35,953 --> 00:16:38,956 I have to be a safe place for Tyler, and I have been. 324 00:16:39,874 --> 00:16:42,209 And should you choose to have me here, 325 00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:43,543 I would be that for you. 326 00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:46,047 I-- I would be a cone of silence. 327 00:16:47,048 --> 00:16:48,549 Which is something I think you would want. 328 00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:54,888 Some things should remain unsaid. 329 00:16:54,889 --> 00:16:57,474 I have experience with that. 330 00:16:57,475 --> 00:16:59,684 Besides, I doubt you could tell me 331 00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:01,562 anything I don't already know. 332 00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:04,482 Can't be much good in there. 333 00:17:07,068 --> 00:17:10,696 - Well, that's not true. - And that's not true, either. 334 00:17:14,659 --> 00:17:16,201 Do you mind if I use your bathroom? 335 00:17:16,202 --> 00:17:18,578 Yeah. That would seem cruel if I said no, 336 00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:20,997 seeing as you just drank the equivalent of a lake. 337 00:17:20,998 --> 00:17:22,166 [Jamie chuckles] 338 00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:28,171 - Um... - We removed the door 339 00:17:28,172 --> 00:17:30,508 - to make it easier for Henry. - Oh, sure. 340 00:17:32,927 --> 00:17:35,720 - You know, I think I'm good, actually-- - Do your business. 341 00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:37,515 - I'll refill your lake. - [chuckles] 342 00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:41,352 [phone buzzing] 343 00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:44,771 - [urine splashing] - [phone continues buzzing] 344 00:17:44,772 --> 00:17:46,106 [urinating stops] 345 00:17:46,107 --> 00:17:47,817 That's odd. I don't remember... 346 00:17:48,526 --> 00:17:50,860 - turning that off, that's crazy. - Yes. 347 00:17:50,861 --> 00:17:52,237 - [phone buzzing] - [urinating resumes] 348 00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:54,239 [Jamie] I don't know why that chime's not on. 349 00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:55,949 - Do you need me to bring it to you? - No, no! 350 00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:57,284 Nope, almost done. 351 00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:59,077 - Yep, just... - [toilet flushing] 352 00:17:59,078 --> 00:18:00,370 ...wrapping it up. 353 00:18:00,371 --> 00:18:01,956 [sink faucet running] 354 00:18:04,542 --> 00:18:07,043 Sorry about that. I don't remember 355 00:18:07,044 --> 00:18:08,129 putting it on the... 356 00:18:09,130 --> 00:18:10,922 Um... [clicking tongue] 357 00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:12,674 Unfortunately, he knows it's already gonna be 358 00:18:12,675 --> 00:18:15,760 another day of waiting. It's-- It's still not safe. 359 00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:17,554 I think your son is stressed. 360 00:18:17,555 --> 00:18:20,473 Most of this is him just asking me to quiet his mind. 361 00:18:20,474 --> 00:18:23,059 He's wondering if he's doing the right thing by being there. 362 00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:24,812 Do you think he's doing the right thing? 363 00:18:27,481 --> 00:18:29,441 - That's not my place to-- - Will you reassure him 364 00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:30,735 that he's doing the right thing? 365 00:18:32,570 --> 00:18:34,780 Your son is grappling with all of this, for sure. 366 00:18:42,413 --> 00:18:43,622 - I like all the art. - [Diane] Sure. 367 00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,582 We can change the subject. 368 00:18:45,583 --> 00:18:47,208 [Jamie] No, no, I meant to mention that. 369 00:18:47,209 --> 00:18:49,628 No, I welcome it. The art is all Henry. 370 00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:51,588 - [sink faucet running] - He painted. 371 00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:53,591 Was a painter. Not a hobby. 372 00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:57,927 After he was diagnosed just a little over three years ago, 373 00:18:57,928 --> 00:18:59,929 Henry wanted us to move out here 374 00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:02,098 so he could paint this part of the world 375 00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:03,351 before he could no longer. 376 00:19:05,603 --> 00:19:07,646 I offered to buy him coffee table books 377 00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:09,814 and just bring this world to New York. 378 00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:13,443 But he insisted his eyes see it for themselves. 379 00:19:13,444 --> 00:19:15,570 He knew it was a big ask. 380 00:19:15,571 --> 00:19:19,199 My life was in Manhattan. I was leaving my career, and... 381 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:21,160 But of course, I said I loved the idea. 382 00:19:22,787 --> 00:19:24,955 That was the only lie I ever told my husband. 383 00:19:26,290 --> 00:19:27,875 That husband, anyway. 384 00:19:28,959 --> 00:19:30,836 He was hoping to finish that before he... 385 00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:37,967 What did Tyler tell you about Henry? 386 00:19:37,968 --> 00:19:39,511 - Diane-- - No. 387 00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:41,304 No cone of silence, not with Henry. 388 00:19:41,305 --> 00:19:42,472 With me, fine. 389 00:19:42,473 --> 00:19:44,140 Yes, he said you, uh, 390 00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:46,476 had been together for 27 years, I think. 391 00:19:46,477 --> 00:19:48,144 Twenty-nine. What else? 392 00:19:48,145 --> 00:19:49,979 And, uh, that you two 393 00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:52,065 deserved each other, which I thought was sweet. 394 00:19:52,066 --> 00:19:54,150 [sighs] 395 00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:56,237 It can be heard that way. Is that it? 396 00:19:58,823 --> 00:20:00,073 - Yeah. - [phone chimes] 397 00:20:00,074 --> 00:20:01,701 Maybe deal with that. 398 00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:04,577 - [phone chiming] - Oh, my God. 399 00:20:04,578 --> 00:20:07,080 Now, the sun is being an asshole. 400 00:20:07,081 --> 00:20:08,498 [Jamie] Oh, that sun. Sorry. [chuckles] 401 00:20:08,499 --> 00:20:10,166 - What? - Sorry, I keep thinking 402 00:20:10,167 --> 00:20:11,918 - that you're talking about-- - It's relentless! 403 00:20:11,919 --> 00:20:13,920 Everything here is exposed. 404 00:20:13,921 --> 00:20:15,839 Well, I think some time in the direct sunlight might be-- 405 00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:18,174 - might be helpful. - Well, then you tell me what to do with it. 406 00:20:18,175 --> 00:20:19,801 - What? - You were sent to assist. 407 00:20:19,802 --> 00:20:21,886 So, assist. Sun or shade? 408 00:20:21,887 --> 00:20:23,847 - [phone continues chiming] - Sun or shade? 409 00:20:23,848 --> 00:20:25,223 - Uh, whichever. - Not "whichever." 410 00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:26,683 You have an opinion, express it. 411 00:20:26,684 --> 00:20:27,726 Okay, I think maybe some time 412 00:20:27,727 --> 00:20:28,893 - where-- in the-- - [phone chimes] 413 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:30,520 And for God's sake, respond! 414 00:20:30,521 --> 00:20:32,605 Quiet his mind or whatever it is he needs you to do. 415 00:20:32,606 --> 00:20:34,357 - I'm telling him to hang on. - "He's stressed." 416 00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:36,151 - [text whooshing] - What the hell does he think I'm feeling? 417 00:20:36,152 --> 00:20:38,236 Does he even acknowledge what's happening here? 418 00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:39,362 What I'm going through? 419 00:20:39,363 --> 00:20:41,573 Does he even attempt to text that? 420 00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:44,200 No, don't even tell me. He has my number. 421 00:20:44,201 --> 00:20:46,119 He can use it. After what I've done. 422 00:20:46,120 --> 00:20:48,288 You don't even know what I've put aside. 423 00:20:48,289 --> 00:20:51,541 Because that's what you do. You put it all aside. 424 00:20:51,542 --> 00:20:55,044 You put it all aside, despite how you feel. 425 00:20:55,045 --> 00:20:58,715 When someone is hurting, someone you're supposed to love, 426 00:20:58,716 --> 00:21:01,593 you put it aside, you ungrateful, 427 00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:03,053 selfish dickhead! 428 00:21:08,559 --> 00:21:10,436 I'm sorry. That wasn't, um... 429 00:21:11,896 --> 00:21:12,897 And... 430 00:21:15,566 --> 00:21:17,234 I'm sorry about the, um... 431 00:21:18,736 --> 00:21:21,404 Henry dealt with the plants. 432 00:21:21,405 --> 00:21:23,448 He-- They were his thing. 433 00:21:23,449 --> 00:21:26,660 He-- he loved them, and I, um... 434 00:21:34,919 --> 00:21:39,088 Diane, um, I know this is all very overwhelming, 435 00:21:39,089 --> 00:21:40,925 and I certainly don't want to add to that. 436 00:21:41,967 --> 00:21:43,511 But I am happy to be here. 437 00:21:44,762 --> 00:21:48,473 If only to focus all of my assistance 438 00:21:48,474 --> 00:21:51,018 on saving that succulent. 439 00:21:52,853 --> 00:21:53,978 [scoffs lightly] 440 00:21:53,979 --> 00:21:55,356 - Hm. - My God. [chuckles] 441 00:21:58,025 --> 00:21:59,485 Well, we, um... 442 00:22:00,820 --> 00:22:02,779 we turned the spare into an art studio, 443 00:22:02,780 --> 00:22:04,322 so you'll have to sleep out here. 444 00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:05,782 Sure. 445 00:22:05,783 --> 00:22:06,784 Okay. 446 00:22:09,036 --> 00:22:10,537 Oh. 447 00:22:10,538 --> 00:22:12,956 - It is a bed. - Oh, yeah, no, it's-- 448 00:22:12,957 --> 00:22:14,707 - Or there's the couch. - Yeah. Oh, maybe the couch. 449 00:22:14,708 --> 00:22:16,125 That is where he died, though, so... 450 00:22:16,126 --> 00:22:17,460 - Wow, okay. - ...it's up to you. 451 00:22:17,461 --> 00:22:18,545 - No, that's-- - I'll get sheets. 452 00:22:18,546 --> 00:22:19,671 Thanks. 453 00:22:19,672 --> 00:22:21,674 [phone chiming] 454 00:22:23,133 --> 00:22:26,302 There's no reason to be worried, is there, for his safety? 455 00:22:26,303 --> 00:22:28,596 No, no, he wouldn't put himself in danger. 456 00:22:28,597 --> 00:22:30,975 [scoffs] I probably should have asked that first. 457 00:22:35,145 --> 00:22:38,148 [♪ gentle music playing] 458 00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:43,028 [insects chirring] 459 00:23:00,004 --> 00:23:01,337 Thank you for making dinner. 460 00:23:01,338 --> 00:23:02,922 Oh, I didn't make. I heated. 461 00:23:02,923 --> 00:23:04,382 - [chuckles] - It's amazing what dishes 462 00:23:04,383 --> 00:23:05,884 people are inclined to bring over. 463 00:23:05,885 --> 00:23:08,386 According to my fridge, you'd think I only eat 464 00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:11,264 casseroles and enchiladas. 465 00:23:11,265 --> 00:23:12,932 [Jamie chuckles] 466 00:23:12,933 --> 00:23:15,393 Well, people just like to bring comfort food. 467 00:23:15,394 --> 00:23:17,770 Yeah, well, I've been comforted by a salad. 468 00:23:17,771 --> 00:23:19,064 [Jamie laughing] 469 00:23:20,107 --> 00:23:22,191 Was that genuine? 470 00:23:22,192 --> 00:23:24,861 Yes. I thought it was funny. 471 00:23:24,862 --> 00:23:27,114 Oh, just checking. You chuckle a lot. 472 00:23:28,198 --> 00:23:30,450 But I might have to challenge the validity 473 00:23:30,451 --> 00:23:32,452 of a comforting salad. 474 00:23:32,453 --> 00:23:35,122 Oh, I forgot to give this to you, from Tyler. 475 00:23:37,708 --> 00:23:41,295 Yes, it's my handwriting, but his words, dictated. 476 00:23:42,421 --> 00:23:44,631 He is good about sending cards. 477 00:23:44,632 --> 00:23:47,593 Interestingly enough, going on about four years now. 478 00:23:53,974 --> 00:23:56,142 How'd it go with Tyler? 479 00:23:56,143 --> 00:23:59,145 Were you able to reassure him? 480 00:23:59,146 --> 00:24:01,064 Oh, yes, yeah. But I'll hear from him again, 481 00:24:01,065 --> 00:24:03,566 and then I'll have to reassure him all over again. 482 00:24:03,567 --> 00:24:06,403 That's the cycle. Welcome to my world. 483 00:24:08,113 --> 00:24:10,406 Hmm. Tyler was always anxious. 484 00:24:10,407 --> 00:24:12,659 - That world has not changed. - [chuckles] 485 00:24:12,660 --> 00:24:14,702 I remember once picking him up from kindergarten. 486 00:24:14,703 --> 00:24:18,414 He was-- [chuckles] He was in tears, inconsolable. 487 00:24:18,415 --> 00:24:20,166 My mind thought the worst, you know, 488 00:24:20,167 --> 00:24:22,919 he'd been hit or bullied. 489 00:24:22,920 --> 00:24:25,213 It turns out he was just-- he was just upset 490 00:24:25,214 --> 00:24:27,632 because he was terrible at cutting with scissors. 491 00:24:27,633 --> 00:24:29,802 [laughing] 492 00:24:31,637 --> 00:24:34,139 Of course, I stifled my laugh on that day. 493 00:24:35,432 --> 00:24:39,103 I validated his feelings. My son was seen and heard. 494 00:24:40,270 --> 00:24:42,438 Plus, as I would come to learn, 495 00:24:42,439 --> 00:24:44,232 his teachers were genuinely concerned 496 00:24:44,233 --> 00:24:45,775 about his inability to cut. 497 00:24:45,776 --> 00:24:48,611 So, fuck me, I guess. Fuck me for not knowing 498 00:24:48,612 --> 00:24:50,488 it was some kind of developmental thing. 499 00:24:50,489 --> 00:24:52,490 Hands being able to do different tasks 500 00:24:52,491 --> 00:24:54,117 at the same time or something, I don't know. 501 00:24:54,118 --> 00:24:56,119 Anyway, Tyler was distraught 502 00:24:56,120 --> 00:24:58,162 because all the other kids could do it and he couldn't. 503 00:24:58,163 --> 00:25:00,331 So, I spent that weekend with him, 504 00:25:00,332 --> 00:25:01,874 just sitting on the floor, 505 00:25:01,875 --> 00:25:03,876 cutting up all my good magazines. 506 00:25:03,877 --> 00:25:05,337 [chuckles] 507 00:25:07,339 --> 00:25:09,007 Is he good at cutting with scissors now? 508 00:25:09,008 --> 00:25:11,301 You know, I can't say I've ever seen him do it. 509 00:25:11,969 --> 00:25:14,470 Maybe text him at some point, find out. 510 00:25:14,471 --> 00:25:16,014 Be nice to know I made a difference, 511 00:25:16,015 --> 00:25:18,976 and that my magazines did not die in vain. 512 00:25:20,227 --> 00:25:23,647 You know, Diane, you could text him yourself. 513 00:25:29,820 --> 00:25:31,362 And if it gives you any solace, 514 00:25:31,363 --> 00:25:33,197 I happen to know you did make a difference, 515 00:25:33,198 --> 00:25:35,491 because Tyler told me what it was like 516 00:25:35,492 --> 00:25:38,578 for him coming out to you, and he said you were amazing. 517 00:25:38,579 --> 00:25:40,121 Are you allowed to tell me that? 518 00:25:40,122 --> 00:25:43,584 I think I can lift the cone on this one. 519 00:25:45,169 --> 00:25:49,297 He said when he finally got up the nerve to come out to you, 520 00:25:49,298 --> 00:25:51,800 he felt like you were already there waiting. 521 00:25:52,885 --> 00:25:56,597 "Waiting to give him love." Those were his exact words. 522 00:25:57,389 --> 00:25:59,390 Well, I was there. 523 00:25:59,391 --> 00:26:02,018 And I was there all the times he almost came out. 524 00:26:02,019 --> 00:26:04,228 - [chuckles] - I always knew he was gay 525 00:26:04,229 --> 00:26:05,605 from an early age. 526 00:26:05,606 --> 00:26:07,231 And for so many years, there were these moments 527 00:26:07,232 --> 00:26:09,400 where he'd come into a room where I was, 528 00:26:09,401 --> 00:26:13,404 not even the room, just into the doorway. 529 00:26:13,405 --> 00:26:15,282 And I'd see it right there on his face. 530 00:26:16,283 --> 00:26:18,868 And I'd think to myself every time, 531 00:26:18,869 --> 00:26:21,287 "This is it, Diane, he's gonna come out, don't screw it up." 532 00:26:21,288 --> 00:26:23,414 [chuckles] 533 00:26:23,415 --> 00:26:25,083 And believe me, it took everything in my power 534 00:26:25,084 --> 00:26:26,919 not to want to yank him out myself. 535 00:26:28,545 --> 00:26:29,546 I just... 536 00:26:30,923 --> 00:26:32,924 I just wanted him to get to the other side of it. 537 00:26:32,925 --> 00:26:34,927 I knew it would be better there. 538 00:26:36,053 --> 00:26:38,387 I knew it was up to him, of course. 539 00:26:38,388 --> 00:26:40,932 So, I just stayed still, calm, 540 00:26:40,933 --> 00:26:46,270 and we'd stare at each other for what felt like forever... 541 00:26:46,271 --> 00:26:49,817 waiting on the same thing, waiting for him to step through. 542 00:26:50,943 --> 00:26:52,985 And eventually, all those times I'd-- 543 00:26:52,986 --> 00:26:57,116 I'd I just have to watch him push it all down and walk away. 544 00:26:58,283 --> 00:27:02,578 So, when the day came, the day... 545 00:27:02,579 --> 00:27:05,123 Oh, Tyler was 23, home for Christmas, 546 00:27:05,124 --> 00:27:06,916 and I was in the kitchen, cooking. 547 00:27:06,917 --> 00:27:09,794 And he came in like he'd done so many times before, 548 00:27:09,795 --> 00:27:12,172 right into the doorway, no further. 549 00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:17,760 And the look was the same. 550 00:27:17,761 --> 00:27:21,264 The fear was there, the pain, all of it the same. 551 00:27:21,265 --> 00:27:22,808 [clicking tongue] But in that moment, I just... 552 00:27:23,851 --> 00:27:25,435 I knew I couldn't stay still. 553 00:27:26,478 --> 00:27:28,272 I knew I couldn't yank, but... 554 00:27:29,523 --> 00:27:32,358 [sighs] I needed to make this the right time for my son. 555 00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:36,321 So, I just looked at him and I said... 556 00:27:38,031 --> 00:27:39,116 "I love you." 557 00:27:40,325 --> 00:27:41,951 I mean, I'd said it so many times before, 558 00:27:41,952 --> 00:27:43,787 but I guess never like that, like... 559 00:27:44,830 --> 00:27:47,291 like reassurance. 560 00:27:48,375 --> 00:27:49,960 As if maybe he'd forgotten. 561 00:27:51,879 --> 00:27:55,174 And with that, Tyler just exhaled. 562 00:27:56,216 --> 00:27:58,676 And I watched it all fall away. 563 00:27:58,677 --> 00:28:02,389 And I watched my son step into the room. 564 00:28:06,310 --> 00:28:07,810 - Wow. - Mm. 565 00:28:07,811 --> 00:28:10,355 - Hm. - And then, we made dinner together. 566 00:28:11,315 --> 00:28:12,316 In fact... 567 00:28:13,317 --> 00:28:14,650 we made a comforting salad. 568 00:28:14,651 --> 00:28:16,195 [laughing] 569 00:28:17,196 --> 00:28:18,738 Well, no offense to scissors, 570 00:28:18,739 --> 00:28:22,534 but I think that is a-- a bigger difference. 571 00:28:25,370 --> 00:28:28,497 Tyler is very lucky to have you as a mom. 572 00:28:28,498 --> 00:28:29,541 [Diane] Mm. 573 00:28:30,500 --> 00:28:31,668 And what about you? 574 00:28:32,669 --> 00:28:34,379 Were you lucky with your parents? 575 00:28:35,380 --> 00:28:37,006 Um... 576 00:28:37,007 --> 00:28:38,549 - You-- you don't have to say. - No, no, no. No. 577 00:28:38,550 --> 00:28:40,843 I-- I'd like to think I would have been, yeah. 578 00:28:40,844 --> 00:28:44,223 But um, I lost both my parents before I, uh... 579 00:28:46,016 --> 00:28:48,184 I came out later than I should ha-- I mean, not should have. 580 00:28:48,185 --> 00:28:49,894 I came out when I was ready and I wasn't ready 581 00:28:49,895 --> 00:28:52,772 until I was 35, and... 582 00:28:52,773 --> 00:28:55,358 they both passed away within a year of each other. 583 00:28:55,359 --> 00:28:58,527 It was, um, cancer came for both of them. 584 00:28:58,528 --> 00:29:00,697 - I'm sorry. - Thank you. Thank you. 585 00:29:01,615 --> 00:29:03,407 - Do you have any siblings? - No. 586 00:29:03,408 --> 00:29:05,952 Uh, I'm an only child, as was my dad. 587 00:29:05,953 --> 00:29:08,454 And my mom didn't talk to her sister, 588 00:29:08,455 --> 00:29:11,124 and I hear she's gone now, too. So, no, it's just me. 589 00:29:12,626 --> 00:29:14,460 That must have been difficult. 590 00:29:14,461 --> 00:29:16,255 Caring for both of them on your own? 591 00:29:20,259 --> 00:29:21,425 Yeah. 592 00:29:21,426 --> 00:29:23,053 Yeah, it was. But, um... 593 00:29:24,263 --> 00:29:25,555 But, you know, I mean... 594 00:29:26,723 --> 00:29:28,975 we weren't really given a choice in the matter. [chuckles] 595 00:29:28,976 --> 00:29:31,270 We just had to get good at it fast, right? 596 00:29:33,563 --> 00:29:34,898 - Yes, we did. - Hmm. 597 00:29:38,402 --> 00:29:41,404 If you don't mind... me asking, 598 00:29:41,405 --> 00:29:43,406 do you know why you did wait? 599 00:29:43,407 --> 00:29:46,076 Why you weren't ready until you were? 600 00:29:49,746 --> 00:29:50,998 I imagine I do. 601 00:29:52,249 --> 00:29:53,250 Yeah. 602 00:29:54,960 --> 00:29:56,336 [chuckles softly] Uh... 603 00:30:01,758 --> 00:30:03,676 Not that I can't drink alone, 604 00:30:03,677 --> 00:30:06,305 but can I, uh, get you a glass? 605 00:30:09,599 --> 00:30:10,600 Yeah. 606 00:30:12,019 --> 00:30:13,644 Thank you. [chuckles] 607 00:30:13,645 --> 00:30:16,648 [♪ gentle music playing] 608 00:30:25,949 --> 00:30:27,284 [phone chimes] 609 00:30:31,288 --> 00:30:32,622 [phone chimes] 610 00:30:37,502 --> 00:30:38,712 [phone chimes] 611 00:30:39,963 --> 00:30:41,381 [phone chimes] 612 00:30:43,842 --> 00:30:45,302 [phone buzzing] 613 00:30:48,638 --> 00:30:49,973 [phone buzzing] 614 00:31:00,025 --> 00:31:02,486 Oh. What did she do here? 615 00:31:03,487 --> 00:31:05,488 - Good morning. - Oh, good morning. 616 00:31:05,489 --> 00:31:08,074 Well, I'm afraid it was overwatered, 617 00:31:08,075 --> 00:31:09,742 so I'm just gonna let the leaves 618 00:31:09,743 --> 00:31:11,869 and the roots dry out a little bit. 619 00:31:11,870 --> 00:31:13,412 It's worth a shot. 620 00:31:13,413 --> 00:31:15,581 Oh, and I, um, I emptied your dishwasher, 621 00:31:15,582 --> 00:31:18,250 but I wasn't sure where those platters went. 622 00:31:18,251 --> 00:31:20,336 And I made some coffee. 623 00:31:20,337 --> 00:31:22,546 What happened to just focusing on the succulent? 624 00:31:22,547 --> 00:31:23,881 I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself. 625 00:31:23,882 --> 00:31:25,549 I kinda get off on this stuff, 626 00:31:25,550 --> 00:31:27,719 and I instantly regret saying "get off." 627 00:31:29,262 --> 00:31:32,056 And did you "get off" on feeding the cat, too? 628 00:31:32,057 --> 00:31:34,558 Uh, yes. Again, sorry, I just-- 629 00:31:34,559 --> 00:31:36,394 I noticed the bowl was empty. 630 00:31:36,395 --> 00:31:37,770 Well, that one's all for naught. 631 00:31:37,771 --> 00:31:39,856 The cat was carried off by an owl, so... 632 00:31:42,192 --> 00:31:44,777 - Wait, what? - Yeah, he was sunning out on the patio. 633 00:31:44,778 --> 00:31:48,155 An owl swooped down, and off they went. 634 00:31:48,156 --> 00:31:50,283 All that was left was a piece of his tail. 635 00:31:51,284 --> 00:31:53,036 - That's a thing? - All the time. 636 00:31:53,745 --> 00:31:57,540 Henry insisted we leave the bowl out because, 637 00:31:57,541 --> 00:31:59,375 I don't know, maybe he thought the owl 638 00:31:59,376 --> 00:32:01,710 would circle back and drop the cat off? 639 00:32:01,711 --> 00:32:02,712 [Jamie chuckles] 640 00:32:04,047 --> 00:32:05,798 I'm sorry, that's horrible. 641 00:32:05,799 --> 00:32:07,592 The act of it, yes, but... 642 00:32:09,177 --> 00:32:11,263 Barnaby only really loved Henry, so... 643 00:32:13,223 --> 00:32:14,974 I'm thinking this is a good thing. 644 00:32:14,975 --> 00:32:16,393 They're together again. 645 00:32:17,894 --> 00:32:19,438 [refrigerator door opens and closes] 646 00:32:25,444 --> 00:32:27,487 That goes down there, and that in the corner. 647 00:32:28,613 --> 00:32:29,614 Yes. 648 00:32:35,579 --> 00:32:36,955 Any word from Tyler? 649 00:32:38,582 --> 00:32:40,624 Yeah, um, yeah, sorry. 650 00:32:40,625 --> 00:32:44,087 It's-- It's-- It's not safe, unfortunately. 651 00:32:45,088 --> 00:32:47,257 And I'm sorry, I should have mentioned. 652 00:32:54,931 --> 00:32:56,682 - [car beeping] - [neighbor] Diane! 653 00:32:56,683 --> 00:32:58,434 - [softly] Oh, shit. - Diane! 654 00:32:58,435 --> 00:32:59,936 Oh. [sighs] 655 00:33:00,937 --> 00:33:03,481 - Diane. - Oh. Hi, Judith. 656 00:33:03,482 --> 00:33:04,982 - Hi. - Love the turquoise. 657 00:33:04,983 --> 00:33:06,692 Oh, thanks. Can't get enough. 658 00:33:06,693 --> 00:33:08,903 - Seems like it. - Yes. 659 00:33:08,904 --> 00:33:10,279 This is Judith, my next door neighbor. 660 00:33:10,280 --> 00:33:12,114 And this is Jamie. 661 00:33:12,115 --> 00:33:13,782 A gift from my son. 662 00:33:13,783 --> 00:33:15,451 Oh! 663 00:33:15,452 --> 00:33:17,536 That's very sweet. Nice to meet you. 664 00:33:17,537 --> 00:33:18,788 [Jamie] Nice to meet you. 665 00:33:20,123 --> 00:33:21,499 And how are you? 666 00:33:21,500 --> 00:33:23,709 I'm doing okay, thank you. 667 00:33:23,710 --> 00:33:26,296 Well, I hate to pile on more troubling news. 668 00:33:27,380 --> 00:33:29,006 Yeah. My Chipper is missing. 669 00:33:29,007 --> 00:33:30,883 Oh, no, that is more troubling. 670 00:33:30,884 --> 00:33:32,968 Yes, it's my chihuahua. 671 00:33:32,969 --> 00:33:34,136 - Oh. - Mix. 672 00:33:34,137 --> 00:33:36,555 I mean, purebred, uh, mix. 673 00:33:36,556 --> 00:33:37,973 Wow. 674 00:33:37,974 --> 00:33:40,142 [Judith] Trying to stay positive. 675 00:33:40,143 --> 00:33:43,020 You know, gotta keep hope alive. 676 00:33:43,021 --> 00:33:44,314 You know. [chuckles] 677 00:33:46,149 --> 00:33:48,984 - I do know. - Well, if either of you see him, 678 00:33:48,985 --> 00:33:50,653 just give me a call. 679 00:33:50,654 --> 00:33:52,363 - Sure. Oh. - And if I don't answer, 680 00:33:52,364 --> 00:33:54,865 of course I'll call right back, but I'll probably answer. 681 00:33:54,866 --> 00:33:56,659 - Oh. - And all prayers welcome. 682 00:33:56,660 --> 00:33:58,160 - Sure. - Thank you so much. 683 00:33:58,161 --> 00:34:00,329 - God bless. - [Jamie] Bye-bye. 684 00:34:00,330 --> 00:34:03,332 Ooh, Marci! Hello, girl! 685 00:34:03,333 --> 00:34:04,833 Hold up. 686 00:34:04,834 --> 00:34:07,211 Diane, I think her dog-- 687 00:34:07,212 --> 00:34:09,714 Yeah, a hawk. I saw it happen from the window. 688 00:34:11,967 --> 00:34:14,176 - Should we tell her? - You heard her. 689 00:34:14,177 --> 00:34:15,679 She needs to keep hope alive. 690 00:34:16,680 --> 00:34:18,681 - [Jamie] Oh, thank you. - [server] Of course. 691 00:34:18,682 --> 00:34:23,018 I'm beginning to understand this whole green chile obsession. 692 00:34:23,019 --> 00:34:24,688 - It's basically a cult. - [laughing] 693 00:34:25,355 --> 00:34:26,356 [Diane sighs] 694 00:34:26,731 --> 00:34:28,358 Henry couldn't get enough, either. 695 00:34:28,692 --> 00:34:30,526 [people chattering] 696 00:34:30,527 --> 00:34:34,530 Oh, do you want to start a-- a list of things we need to do? 697 00:34:34,531 --> 00:34:37,408 I have one. Henry made it. 698 00:34:37,409 --> 00:34:39,285 - Oh. - He found it to be one of the perks 699 00:34:39,286 --> 00:34:40,704 of knowing his "end date." 700 00:34:41,705 --> 00:34:42,871 His words. 701 00:34:42,872 --> 00:34:44,040 I haven't opened it. 702 00:34:45,542 --> 00:34:48,335 Are you sure you want me to? I mean, it might be a note. 703 00:34:48,336 --> 00:34:51,423 I was by his side in the end, we said everything. 704 00:34:52,716 --> 00:34:53,717 Okay. 705 00:34:56,636 --> 00:34:57,637 Alrighty. 706 00:35:00,473 --> 00:35:02,225 Yep. See, just a list. 707 00:35:04,728 --> 00:35:07,730 "Henry's Exit Strategy. 708 00:35:07,731 --> 00:35:09,773 "Number one, I want a fully stocked bar 709 00:35:09,774 --> 00:35:11,609 "at the reception, but no champagne. 710 00:35:11,610 --> 00:35:13,987 "I hate it, so no one toast me with it. 711 00:35:15,238 --> 00:35:17,323 "Number two, music at the service. 712 00:35:17,324 --> 00:35:19,408 "You know me, Diane. I don't do subtle. 713 00:35:19,409 --> 00:35:21,285 "So, Beach Boys' 'God Only Knows' 714 00:35:21,286 --> 00:35:23,454 "as the guests arrive. And as they leave, 715 00:35:23,455 --> 00:35:26,666 Barry White's 'You're the First, the Last, My Everything.'" 716 00:35:27,751 --> 00:35:31,253 Well, that's not gonna fly with his church. 717 00:35:31,254 --> 00:35:33,339 Well, his church hasn't met me yet. 718 00:35:33,340 --> 00:35:34,758 And you haven't met his church. 719 00:35:35,925 --> 00:35:37,926 - Well, then they'll do it for you. - No. 720 00:35:37,927 --> 00:35:40,846 They don't know me. They know of me. 721 00:35:40,847 --> 00:35:43,307 I'd drop Henry off and pick him up. 722 00:35:43,308 --> 00:35:45,602 Henry made friends here, I made acquaintances. 723 00:35:46,478 --> 00:35:48,812 Well, then they'll do it for Henry. 724 00:35:48,813 --> 00:35:49,814 What else? 725 00:35:51,524 --> 00:35:54,818 Uh, "Number three, flowers. I leave that up to you, Diane. 726 00:35:54,819 --> 00:35:57,697 "Fill the church with whatever makes you feel New York. 727 00:35:59,282 --> 00:36:00,367 "One stipulation. 728 00:36:02,410 --> 00:36:05,204 You must purchase the flowers from Doris Kato's cousin." 729 00:36:05,205 --> 00:36:06,664 Are you fucking kidding me? 730 00:36:06,665 --> 00:36:08,123 "Her name is Kathy, by the way. 731 00:36:08,124 --> 00:36:09,500 - I know you weren't listening." - [sighs] 732 00:36:09,501 --> 00:36:10,710 [softly] My God. 733 00:36:11,795 --> 00:36:13,045 - "Number four." - What? 734 00:36:13,046 --> 00:36:15,173 Invite Kathy to the service? 735 00:36:17,509 --> 00:36:18,968 "Finish my painting." 736 00:36:24,015 --> 00:36:26,517 Well, that's not happening. I can't paint. 737 00:36:26,518 --> 00:36:29,061 "It doesn't matter that you can't paint, Diane. 738 00:36:29,062 --> 00:36:30,689 "Painting brought us together. 739 00:36:31,648 --> 00:36:33,692 I want you to finish what I couldn't." 740 00:36:34,734 --> 00:36:36,568 Well... [clearing throat] 741 00:36:36,569 --> 00:36:38,488 It is finished. That's how I want it. 742 00:36:40,699 --> 00:36:42,324 Well, it might be cool to have some-- 743 00:36:42,325 --> 00:36:44,160 Are there any other numbers, or is that it? 744 00:36:52,210 --> 00:36:54,878 Can you be done? We've got a lot to do. 745 00:36:54,879 --> 00:36:57,381 Yeah, I-- yeah, I can be done. 746 00:36:57,382 --> 00:36:58,383 Hello? 747 00:37:00,051 --> 00:37:03,178 I just want to reiterate, again, how very honored I am 748 00:37:03,179 --> 00:37:04,847 to be entrusted with these arrangements. 749 00:37:04,848 --> 00:37:06,515 Well, that's the hope. But I should warn you, 750 00:37:06,516 --> 00:37:08,267 my husband was very specific. 751 00:37:08,268 --> 00:37:10,436 He wants to feel New York, so I'm not sure if you even-- 752 00:37:10,437 --> 00:37:12,271 Of course. Spring? Summer? 753 00:37:12,272 --> 00:37:15,190 - What was his favorite season? - Spring. But specifically, 754 00:37:15,191 --> 00:37:17,192 - it should include tulips. - We should start with my tulips. 755 00:37:17,193 --> 00:37:18,694 And I'm gonna want a wide variety of colors-- 756 00:37:18,695 --> 00:37:19,778 You won't believe all the colors. 757 00:37:19,779 --> 00:37:21,280 Well, it's one thing to say it. 758 00:37:21,281 --> 00:37:23,532 But you need to see them. Of course. 759 00:37:23,533 --> 00:37:25,535 [♪ soft cheerful music playing over speakers] 760 00:37:28,413 --> 00:37:29,788 Your signature, please. 761 00:37:29,789 --> 00:37:31,875 And just the deposit is due today. 762 00:37:32,709 --> 00:37:34,585 Um, Kathy, the succulent, 763 00:37:34,586 --> 00:37:36,879 the one that Henry and Diane bought here, 764 00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:38,422 um, it's not doing well. 765 00:37:38,423 --> 00:37:40,299 - Oh, no. - [Jamie] I know. 766 00:37:40,300 --> 00:37:42,469 I know, and I'm wondering if maybe it wasn't in the... 767 00:37:43,595 --> 00:37:46,263 healthiest of conditions when they got it? 768 00:37:46,264 --> 00:37:49,141 'Cause it doesn't seem like they did anything wrong. 769 00:37:49,142 --> 00:37:51,477 And it's likely Diane will be able to save it, 770 00:37:51,478 --> 00:37:54,396 - but it's just, you know, it's a little disappointing. - [Kathy] Of course. 771 00:37:54,397 --> 00:37:56,273 - I-- I'm so sorry. - [Jamie] No, no, no. 772 00:37:56,274 --> 00:37:58,776 I only mention it because of Henry. 773 00:37:58,777 --> 00:38:00,652 Because he just-- he loved plants, 774 00:38:00,653 --> 00:38:03,406 and they were very much a passion of his. 775 00:38:04,449 --> 00:38:06,617 And your cousin recommended you. 776 00:38:06,618 --> 00:38:08,160 No. Say no more. 777 00:38:08,161 --> 00:38:09,912 Please, let me try and make it right. 778 00:38:09,913 --> 00:38:11,079 30% off. 779 00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:13,415 What? No. Oh, Kathy. 780 00:38:13,416 --> 00:38:15,001 - No, I insist. - Thank you. Well, thank you. 781 00:38:17,629 --> 00:38:19,588 Take your victory lap quickly. 782 00:38:19,589 --> 00:38:21,423 Can you believe this cold weather? 783 00:38:21,424 --> 00:38:24,092 I mean, I've been here a while, but when you hear "desert," 784 00:38:24,093 --> 00:38:25,511 - you think... - [both] It's gotta be hot! 785 00:38:25,512 --> 00:38:26,596 - No. - I know. 786 00:38:29,849 --> 00:38:31,809 So, maybe in a day or so, we'll just give it 787 00:38:31,810 --> 00:38:33,436 a little misting. 788 00:38:35,313 --> 00:38:37,356 Are you picking out some photos to display? 789 00:38:37,357 --> 00:38:39,942 Yes, I do have some ideas for my husband's funeral. 790 00:38:39,943 --> 00:38:41,944 [Jamie chuckles] 791 00:38:41,945 --> 00:38:43,487 Oh, wow. 792 00:38:43,488 --> 00:38:44,489 Tyler. 793 00:38:46,115 --> 00:38:47,366 [Diane] [sighs] Yep. 794 00:38:47,367 --> 00:38:48,785 Always adorable. 795 00:38:57,627 --> 00:38:59,002 [Jamie] Aw. 796 00:38:59,003 --> 00:39:01,839 Tyler has this one framed in his house. 797 00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:03,841 - Mm. - [Jamie chuckles] 798 00:39:03,842 --> 00:39:05,342 Has he told you a lot about his dad? 799 00:39:05,343 --> 00:39:06,636 Oh, yeah. 800 00:39:08,471 --> 00:39:09,972 I mean, mentioned, really. 801 00:39:09,973 --> 00:39:11,307 I mean, just like pieces, not... 802 00:39:12,475 --> 00:39:15,394 Well, I'll have to give you more photos of them 803 00:39:15,395 --> 00:39:16,729 to take back to LA. 804 00:39:18,314 --> 00:39:19,691 For sure. 805 00:39:21,234 --> 00:39:22,818 Who's this kid? 806 00:39:22,819 --> 00:39:25,237 There's a lot of pictures of them together. 807 00:39:25,238 --> 00:39:27,406 Is he a-- Is he a cousin? 808 00:39:27,407 --> 00:39:29,491 No, that's Bobby, his first boyfriend. 809 00:39:29,492 --> 00:39:31,327 [laughing] 810 00:39:34,747 --> 00:39:36,164 What? 811 00:39:36,165 --> 00:39:37,166 No! 812 00:39:38,167 --> 00:39:39,419 They're like, what, 11? 813 00:39:40,336 --> 00:39:41,837 Ten. 814 00:39:41,838 --> 00:39:43,213 They didn't say they were boyfriends, 815 00:39:43,214 --> 00:39:44,673 but I knew. 816 00:39:44,674 --> 00:39:46,842 I actually caught them once. They didn't see me, 817 00:39:46,843 --> 00:39:48,760 but yeah, I caught them exploring. 818 00:39:48,761 --> 00:39:50,263 Nothing scandalous. 819 00:39:52,015 --> 00:39:54,016 - That had to be rough. - Why? 820 00:39:54,017 --> 00:39:55,851 I told you, I always knew he was gay. 821 00:39:55,852 --> 00:39:57,895 Well, it's one thing to know, it's another thing to see them-- 822 00:39:57,896 --> 00:39:59,521 I mean, what did you even say? 823 00:39:59,522 --> 00:40:02,232 I said nothing, to this day. 824 00:40:02,233 --> 00:40:04,526 I never wanted him to feel that anything was wrong 825 00:40:04,527 --> 00:40:06,863 with what they were doing or what they might be feeling. 826 00:40:10,283 --> 00:40:11,784 Wow, that's, um... 827 00:40:13,953 --> 00:40:15,038 Okay. 828 00:40:15,788 --> 00:40:18,707 So, uh, are Tyler and Bobby still in touch? 829 00:40:18,708 --> 00:40:20,709 - I imagine so. Why? - I don't know. 830 00:40:20,710 --> 00:40:23,046 You know, he was cute. At least then. 831 00:40:23,755 --> 00:40:27,299 He's hot now. Big-time interior designer. 832 00:40:27,300 --> 00:40:29,301 Great taste. 833 00:40:29,302 --> 00:40:31,386 He actually lives in LA, too. 834 00:40:31,387 --> 00:40:33,764 I'm surprised you've never met him. 835 00:40:33,765 --> 00:40:36,224 I mean, you know, Tyler doesn't include me 836 00:40:36,225 --> 00:40:37,267 in all of his circles, 837 00:40:37,268 --> 00:40:39,645 and he does not want for friends. 838 00:40:39,646 --> 00:40:42,940 I imagine he does not want for more than just friends, either. 839 00:40:42,941 --> 00:40:44,942 Not if he's still like he was when he came out. 840 00:40:44,943 --> 00:40:46,735 Maybe even before he came out. 841 00:40:46,736 --> 00:40:48,570 I don't know, I just know there was a revolving door 842 00:40:48,571 --> 00:40:50,072 of men who fell for Tyler. [chuckles] 843 00:40:50,073 --> 00:40:51,449 [chuckles awkwardly] 844 00:40:52,450 --> 00:40:55,745 Well, maybe one day Tyler will introduce you to Bobby. 845 00:40:57,455 --> 00:40:58,997 Yeah. If he does, he does. 846 00:40:58,998 --> 00:40:59,999 Mm. 847 00:41:01,334 --> 00:41:02,709 [♪ Muzak playing in store] 848 00:41:02,710 --> 00:41:05,088 So, have you ever gone through the revolving door? 849 00:41:06,255 --> 00:41:07,589 What? 850 00:41:07,590 --> 00:41:09,425 Tyler's revolving door. 851 00:41:10,510 --> 00:41:13,804 - No, we're just friends. - Not even for a night? 852 00:41:13,805 --> 00:41:17,099 The night you two met, when you "offered yourself up"? 853 00:41:17,100 --> 00:41:19,769 That's not... I went home alone. 854 00:41:20,812 --> 00:41:22,854 No, Tyler and I agreed from early on 855 00:41:22,855 --> 00:41:26,650 that our relationship was different, what with work. 856 00:41:26,651 --> 00:41:28,987 Oh, so there was talk of it, though? 857 00:41:30,029 --> 00:41:32,239 - Oh, inevitably. - Inevitably? 858 00:41:32,240 --> 00:41:34,282 Inevitably. You know, you spend a lot of time with someone, 859 00:41:34,283 --> 00:41:36,326 you get to know them, you start to care for them. 860 00:41:36,327 --> 00:41:38,829 Yeah, you can inevitably start to wonder. 861 00:41:38,830 --> 00:41:41,164 - And you did? - Well, we both did. 862 00:41:41,165 --> 00:41:43,625 We both wondered, but we agreed, 863 00:41:43,626 --> 00:41:45,460 uh, we decided on friendship. 864 00:41:45,461 --> 00:41:46,921 - Who decided? - We both did. 865 00:41:47,964 --> 00:41:49,965 - Quit trying to cut him out of this. - No, I-- I... [scoffs] 866 00:41:49,966 --> 00:41:51,466 - [chuckles] - I just-- I know Tyler 867 00:41:51,467 --> 00:41:53,136 in relationships. I don't know you. 868 00:41:54,303 --> 00:41:56,388 Well, rest assured, we went down that road together, 869 00:41:56,389 --> 00:41:58,015 and we got off that road together. 870 00:41:58,016 --> 00:41:59,641 - [Diane] Mm-hmm. - At a certain point, 871 00:41:59,642 --> 00:42:01,184 I expressed feelings for Tyler, 872 00:42:01,185 --> 00:42:03,562 and Tyler in turn expressed feelings for me, 873 00:42:03,563 --> 00:42:06,023 but he also admitted he wasn't there yet 874 00:42:06,024 --> 00:42:08,233 and wasn't ready for a relationship. 875 00:42:08,234 --> 00:42:10,610 Oh, so you went further down the road than he did? 876 00:42:10,611 --> 00:42:12,696 - Oh, my God. - I'm just trying to clarify. 877 00:42:12,697 --> 00:42:14,156 No, you're trying to interrogate, 878 00:42:14,157 --> 00:42:16,324 and there's nothing to interrogate. 879 00:42:16,325 --> 00:42:17,492 I know my life, Diane. 880 00:42:17,493 --> 00:42:19,411 I know my life with Tyler. Trust me. 881 00:42:19,412 --> 00:42:20,495 - Understood. - Thank you. 882 00:42:20,496 --> 00:42:22,039 We'll just leave it at that, then. 883 00:42:22,040 --> 00:42:24,291 - Great. - You expressed your feelings. 884 00:42:24,292 --> 00:42:27,002 Tyler had similar ones, but he wasn't there yet. 885 00:42:27,003 --> 00:42:30,673 And at a certain point, you decided to just be friends. 886 00:42:33,009 --> 00:42:34,634 There's a little more to it than that. 887 00:42:34,635 --> 00:42:37,220 Well, that's all I know. Maybe we do a charcuterie board. 888 00:42:37,221 --> 00:42:39,014 At a certain point, Tyler did say 889 00:42:39,015 --> 00:42:40,724 he was open to an "us." 890 00:42:40,725 --> 00:42:42,184 I don't have to be in the know. 891 00:42:42,185 --> 00:42:43,643 Well, this is just so you understand. 892 00:42:43,644 --> 00:42:45,187 This was after we decided on friendship. 893 00:42:45,188 --> 00:42:47,064 It was actually a good while after. 894 00:42:47,065 --> 00:42:48,398 Okay. 895 00:42:48,399 --> 00:42:50,609 It was on my birthday, actually. 896 00:42:50,610 --> 00:42:53,779 Tyler took me to dinner, and that's when he said it. 897 00:42:53,780 --> 00:42:56,198 Out of nowhere, he said he was open to an "us," 898 00:42:56,199 --> 00:42:58,533 and I was taken aback. 899 00:42:58,534 --> 00:43:00,869 I mean, in a good way. And I smiled 900 00:43:00,870 --> 00:43:03,830 and said something like, "I would love that." 901 00:43:03,831 --> 00:43:07,209 And then, we proceeded to have a very nice dinner. 902 00:43:07,210 --> 00:43:09,419 And then, I went back to my apartment, 903 00:43:09,420 --> 00:43:14,050 and I woke up to a voicemail from Tyler the next day... 904 00:43:16,302 --> 00:43:17,804 taking it all back. 905 00:43:20,932 --> 00:43:23,266 Yeah, Tyler said he got home and he panicked, 906 00:43:23,267 --> 00:43:25,936 and apologized that this was all happening 907 00:43:25,937 --> 00:43:27,896 on my birthday. 908 00:43:27,897 --> 00:43:30,398 Uh, but yeah, he was still conflicted. 909 00:43:30,399 --> 00:43:33,653 - About what? - About the idea of me with him. 910 00:43:34,612 --> 00:43:36,780 We all have types. 911 00:43:36,781 --> 00:43:38,657 It's just the way it is. 912 00:43:38,658 --> 00:43:40,951 And Tyler was worried that he would ultimately end up 913 00:43:40,952 --> 00:43:43,162 just hurting me and ruining our friendship. 914 00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:46,081 Needless to say, I was pissed and I told him 915 00:43:46,082 --> 00:43:48,292 I needed to take some time alone... 916 00:43:49,502 --> 00:43:50,919 and that I didn't wanna hear from him, 917 00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:52,671 and he was not to reach out to me. 918 00:43:52,672 --> 00:43:54,131 And he said he understood. 919 00:43:54,132 --> 00:43:55,924 I mean, he had no choice but to understand. 920 00:43:55,925 --> 00:43:57,425 And he was also to understand 921 00:43:57,426 --> 00:43:59,094 that if I was to come back, 922 00:43:59,095 --> 00:44:00,971 it would be on my terms. 923 00:44:00,972 --> 00:44:03,181 - And you came back? - Yeah. 924 00:44:03,182 --> 00:44:06,309 But in the way that I wanted to-- needed to. 925 00:44:06,310 --> 00:44:08,979 And you're okay with that? With things between you two 926 00:44:08,980 --> 00:44:10,522 not being the way you want? 927 00:44:10,523 --> 00:44:11,941 Yeah, obviously. I'm here. 928 00:44:13,192 --> 00:44:15,443 Okay. Just making sure. 929 00:44:15,444 --> 00:44:17,446 I know it's not easy to let go of my son. 930 00:44:24,120 --> 00:44:27,123 [♪ gentle music playing] 931 00:44:36,549 --> 00:44:38,049 - You got it? - Yep. 932 00:44:38,050 --> 00:44:39,051 Alright. 933 00:44:47,393 --> 00:44:49,060 - Did you move the painting? - I did. 934 00:44:49,061 --> 00:44:50,562 I thought maybe you would want it out of the way. 935 00:44:50,563 --> 00:44:52,147 No, I need it where it was. Put it back. 936 00:44:52,148 --> 00:44:53,149 Please. 937 00:44:54,483 --> 00:44:56,694 - Of course. I'm sorry. - It's alright. 938 00:44:58,863 --> 00:45:00,031 [Diane sighs] 939 00:45:03,826 --> 00:45:07,371 How do you feel about me boxing some of that up? 940 00:45:08,915 --> 00:45:12,083 I could look into some take-back programs. 941 00:45:12,084 --> 00:45:13,960 That's what I did with my parents' medication. 942 00:45:13,961 --> 00:45:16,379 It's just a place to properly dispose of it. 943 00:45:16,380 --> 00:45:17,381 Fine. 944 00:45:19,383 --> 00:45:21,384 Wow, that's a great picture of Henry. 945 00:45:21,385 --> 00:45:23,720 Is it-- is that your place in New York? 946 00:45:23,721 --> 00:45:25,680 [Diane] Loft in Chelsea. 947 00:45:25,681 --> 00:45:27,724 - [Jamie] So, these are all of your choices? - [Diane] Mm-hmm. 948 00:45:27,725 --> 00:45:29,392 Okay. 949 00:45:29,393 --> 00:45:31,603 - What? - Nothing. 950 00:45:31,604 --> 00:45:35,190 No, go ahead. "Get off" on your opinion. 951 00:45:35,191 --> 00:45:36,942 It just seems like it's a lot of Henry 952 00:45:36,943 --> 00:45:38,610 from your time back east. 953 00:45:38,611 --> 00:45:42,614 - Where we spent 26 years. - Well, and here for over three, 954 00:45:42,615 --> 00:45:44,407 and a lot of the people who are gonna be attending-- 955 00:45:44,408 --> 00:45:47,494 This is not about them. This is about Henry. 956 00:45:47,495 --> 00:45:50,122 And New York was our happy place, not just mine. 957 00:45:54,252 --> 00:45:56,087 - Diane, it's okay to embrace-- - This is Henry! 958 00:46:02,885 --> 00:46:03,886 Yes. 959 00:46:11,727 --> 00:46:13,395 With my parents, 960 00:46:13,396 --> 00:46:17,357 I remember I just-- I had the hardest time 961 00:46:17,358 --> 00:46:19,609 picking out pictures of them to display. 962 00:46:19,610 --> 00:46:22,780 And I'm just speaking for myself here. 963 00:46:24,907 --> 00:46:27,659 You know, I just wanted to see them at their best. 964 00:46:27,660 --> 00:46:30,495 And then, I would look at these pictures that I had taken later 965 00:46:30,496 --> 00:46:32,580 when their bodies had been-- 966 00:46:32,581 --> 00:46:35,500 When I knew what was happening in there. 967 00:46:35,501 --> 00:46:37,085 And these-- and these pictures were just-- 968 00:46:37,086 --> 00:46:39,004 It was little stuff, candid things, you know. 969 00:46:39,005 --> 00:46:41,966 It was them laughing, or reading, or... 970 00:46:42,967 --> 00:46:44,843 sitting on the porch or the couch 971 00:46:44,844 --> 00:46:46,429 holding hands and... 972 00:46:48,764 --> 00:46:51,558 I don't know, I guess I realized those were the moments 973 00:46:51,559 --> 00:46:53,853 that I was really seeing them at their best. 974 00:46:55,771 --> 00:46:57,940 That despite everything, they were just... 975 00:46:59,442 --> 00:47:00,443 being. 976 00:47:04,697 --> 00:47:06,281 - Okay. - What? 977 00:47:06,282 --> 00:47:08,158 No, I hear you. 978 00:47:08,159 --> 00:47:09,659 - It's just a thought. - [sighs] 979 00:47:09,660 --> 00:47:11,620 No, you have a very good point. 980 00:47:14,290 --> 00:47:16,334 [insects chirring] 981 00:47:17,126 --> 00:47:19,044 [owl hooting] 982 00:47:19,045 --> 00:47:20,046 [light clicks] 983 00:47:23,966 --> 00:47:25,343 - Oh, thank you. - Sure. 984 00:47:26,427 --> 00:47:28,345 If you need another blanket, just let me know. 985 00:47:28,346 --> 00:47:30,513 Oh, no, I'm sure that's-- that's fine. 986 00:47:30,514 --> 00:47:33,808 - Thank you very much. - I appreciate you being so open 987 00:47:33,809 --> 00:47:35,226 about your parents. 988 00:47:35,227 --> 00:47:36,395 Of course. 989 00:47:42,985 --> 00:47:45,237 For me, toward the end with Henry... 990 00:47:46,238 --> 00:47:48,490 we-- we didn't know it was the end. 991 00:47:48,491 --> 00:47:50,993 And had I known, I would never have... 992 00:47:52,536 --> 00:47:55,330 [clearing throat] One night, Henry had taken a fall. 993 00:47:55,331 --> 00:47:58,166 He had been sleeping out here for a while. 994 00:47:58,167 --> 00:48:00,335 Navigating had become difficult. 995 00:48:00,336 --> 00:48:02,837 And he fell trying to get to the bathroom. 996 00:48:02,838 --> 00:48:05,132 I was sleeping in-- in our bedroom. 997 00:48:06,175 --> 00:48:10,179 His voice had become weak and gravelly by then, so... 998 00:48:13,849 --> 00:48:15,726 I don't know how long he had been... 999 00:48:29,031 --> 00:48:32,034 So, I don't know how long he had been calling out for help. 1000 00:48:34,036 --> 00:48:36,621 He had soiled himself, and I tried to get him up. 1001 00:48:36,622 --> 00:48:38,706 I couldn't, so I ran to the neighbors, 1002 00:48:38,707 --> 00:48:41,251 the newer neighbors just a few doors down. 1003 00:48:41,252 --> 00:48:42,752 Uh, Henry knew them. 1004 00:48:42,753 --> 00:48:45,548 Of course, I hadn't even bothered to... 1005 00:48:48,717 --> 00:48:51,928 [sighs heavily] I pounded on the door, 1006 00:48:51,929 --> 00:48:53,638 and the young man answers. 1007 00:48:53,639 --> 00:48:55,141 [sighs, groans] 1008 00:48:56,058 --> 00:48:57,893 Chris, I should say his name. Chris. 1009 00:48:58,936 --> 00:49:00,104 I don't think I... 1010 00:49:02,148 --> 00:49:03,940 explained much, maybe three words, 1011 00:49:03,941 --> 00:49:05,483 "Henry had fallen," 1012 00:49:05,484 --> 00:49:07,068 and Chris was already on his way. 1013 00:49:07,069 --> 00:49:08,653 He came right in, he swooped Henry up 1014 00:49:08,654 --> 00:49:10,655 like nothing, like air. 1015 00:49:10,656 --> 00:49:11,907 And Henry said... 1016 00:49:12,950 --> 00:49:15,577 "My Prince Charming, you came." 1017 00:49:15,578 --> 00:49:17,121 [chuckles] 1018 00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:20,123 Chris laughed and Henry laughed, 1019 00:49:20,124 --> 00:49:23,252 and I said, "Well, that's a stupid fucking joke." 1020 00:49:24,503 --> 00:49:26,088 I yelled it, actually. 1021 00:49:27,256 --> 00:49:28,756 I was so mad, 1022 00:49:28,757 --> 00:49:31,509 so mad at having to make everything bearable. 1023 00:49:31,510 --> 00:49:33,761 And-- and this is just so you understand 1024 00:49:33,762 --> 00:49:35,431 why I need that painting there. 1025 00:49:37,141 --> 00:49:38,516 'Cause I hate it. 1026 00:49:38,517 --> 00:49:40,768 Like I hated that joke, 1027 00:49:40,769 --> 00:49:43,271 because it reminds me of how I was. 1028 00:49:43,272 --> 00:49:45,106 I-I don't see the beauty of him painting it. 1029 00:49:45,107 --> 00:49:48,651 I see the tragedy of him not finishing it. 1030 00:49:48,652 --> 00:49:52,071 I see me hating his body because it wouldn't listen to him, 1031 00:49:52,072 --> 00:49:54,657 hating how long it took him to put on his seat belt, 1032 00:49:54,658 --> 00:49:56,701 or to find the breath to tell a story 1033 00:49:56,702 --> 00:49:58,786 he told so many times before. 1034 00:49:58,787 --> 00:50:00,538 I see me... [sighs] 1035 00:50:00,539 --> 00:50:02,624 ...angry and frustrated and short, 1036 00:50:02,625 --> 00:50:04,043 and I see Henry... 1037 00:50:05,794 --> 00:50:08,297 patient and joyful and loving... 1038 00:50:09,340 --> 00:50:11,799 all for me so I'd feel better. 1039 00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:13,302 The one who wasn't dying. 1040 00:50:14,970 --> 00:50:17,972 When I look at that, I see me still here 1041 00:50:17,973 --> 00:50:20,141 without the only man who ever truly knew me, 1042 00:50:20,142 --> 00:50:22,560 everything about me, 1043 00:50:22,561 --> 00:50:25,022 and stayed despite that. [chuckles] 1044 00:50:26,482 --> 00:50:28,192 I need that there so I see me. 1045 00:50:32,154 --> 00:50:33,613 Good night. 1046 00:50:33,614 --> 00:50:36,492 [♪ gentle music playing] 1047 00:50:39,537 --> 00:50:40,538 [light clicks] 1048 00:50:41,163 --> 00:50:43,665 [insects chirring] 1049 00:50:43,666 --> 00:50:45,251 [phone buzzing] 1050 00:50:47,086 --> 00:50:48,504 [phone buzzing] 1051 00:50:53,092 --> 00:50:55,094 [phone continues buzzing] 1052 00:51:00,391 --> 00:51:02,393 [birdsong] 1053 00:51:08,691 --> 00:51:09,692 [approaching footsteps] 1054 00:51:12,111 --> 00:51:13,112 [door creaking] 1055 00:51:16,198 --> 00:51:18,032 I selected a few options for scripture readings 1056 00:51:18,033 --> 00:51:21,869 for the service, ones that I know Henry was fond of 1057 00:51:21,870 --> 00:51:24,455 - from our Bible study class. - Okay. 1058 00:51:24,456 --> 00:51:27,041 There's John 15:11. 1059 00:51:27,042 --> 00:51:29,877 "That My joy may remain in you 1060 00:51:29,878 --> 00:51:31,714 and that your joy may be full." 1061 00:51:32,715 --> 00:51:35,300 - Well-- - There's also John 14, one through three-- 1062 00:51:35,301 --> 00:51:37,719 Okay, I will trust you with the Bible stuff. 1063 00:51:37,720 --> 00:51:39,637 Uh, one area that is very import-- 1064 00:51:39,638 --> 00:51:42,223 - [doors banging] - Sorry I'm late. 1065 00:51:42,224 --> 00:51:44,142 [minister] Diane, you know Judith? 1066 00:51:44,143 --> 00:51:45,393 Of course. 1067 00:51:45,394 --> 00:51:47,312 Judith is our choir director. 1068 00:51:47,313 --> 00:51:48,563 [Judith] Let's get this party started. 1069 00:51:48,564 --> 00:51:49,897 Okay. Hey, neighbor. 1070 00:51:49,898 --> 00:51:51,608 [minister] And seeing that Henry was a beloved member 1071 00:51:51,609 --> 00:51:53,234 of our choir, 1072 00:51:53,235 --> 00:51:55,987 I know that music selection needs to be special. 1073 00:51:55,988 --> 00:51:58,573 Yes, a-actually, that-- that's what I was... 1074 00:51:58,574 --> 00:52:00,908 - Henry was very specific. - [minister] Even better. 1075 00:52:00,909 --> 00:52:03,620 Yeah, he wants the Beach Boys' "God Only Knows" 1076 00:52:03,621 --> 00:52:05,580 as people arrive, 1077 00:52:05,581 --> 00:52:07,957 and "You're the First, My Last, My Everything" 1078 00:52:07,958 --> 00:52:09,500 as they leave. 1079 00:52:09,501 --> 00:52:11,794 - That's, uh, Barry White. Yes. - Yes. 1080 00:52:11,795 --> 00:52:13,921 Barry White. Wonderful talent. 1081 00:52:13,922 --> 00:52:16,424 - [minister] Well... - And I mention this 1082 00:52:16,425 --> 00:52:17,592 because of Henry. 1083 00:52:17,593 --> 00:52:19,510 Music was his passion. 1084 00:52:19,511 --> 00:52:21,846 Singing brought him immense joy. 1085 00:52:21,847 --> 00:52:25,308 Typically, only traditional hymns are used 1086 00:52:25,309 --> 00:52:27,602 - because-- No, listen-- - Seeing-- seeing as how much Henry 1087 00:52:27,603 --> 00:52:29,187 was a part of this church, 1088 00:52:29,188 --> 00:52:31,105 and how much the church meant to him, 1089 00:52:31,106 --> 00:52:32,649 to not have these songs 1090 00:52:32,650 --> 00:52:34,985 would just be a huge disappointment. 1091 00:52:35,944 --> 00:52:37,196 Well, um... 1092 00:52:38,322 --> 00:52:41,824 These are lovely and spirited choices, Diane. 1093 00:52:41,825 --> 00:52:43,952 And one has "God" in the title. 1094 00:52:44,787 --> 00:52:46,663 [sighs] Yes, but, um, 1095 00:52:46,664 --> 00:52:49,667 may I suggest something more appropriate? 1096 00:52:50,584 --> 00:52:54,296 I mean, that I know Henry would love to hear us all sing. 1097 00:52:55,464 --> 00:52:58,633 I'm thinking, uh, "Guide Me, O Thou Great Redeemer." 1098 00:52:58,634 --> 00:53:00,301 - [minister] Oh. Perfect. - Oh, it's so good. 1099 00:53:00,302 --> 00:53:03,971 And "Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus." 1100 00:53:03,972 --> 00:53:05,890 - [Diane] Mm. - It's a big hit. 1101 00:53:05,891 --> 00:53:07,518 - Really big hit. - Yes. 1102 00:53:08,394 --> 00:53:10,521 And how do you know Henry would love these hymns? 1103 00:53:11,522 --> 00:53:13,648 Because of the joy I would see on his face 1104 00:53:13,649 --> 00:53:15,566 - when he was singing them. - Oh. 1105 00:53:15,567 --> 00:53:17,151 Mm, thank you, Judith. 1106 00:53:17,152 --> 00:53:18,653 Of course, yes. 1107 00:53:18,654 --> 00:53:22,324 Thank you for that big bowl of bullshit. 1108 00:53:23,867 --> 00:53:26,244 - [door slamming] - Traditional fucking hymns only! 1109 00:53:26,245 --> 00:53:27,412 What? 1110 00:53:27,413 --> 00:53:29,163 Those people are unbelievable! 1111 00:53:29,164 --> 00:53:30,456 - Who? - The church! 1112 00:53:30,457 --> 00:53:33,000 They shot down my songs like I knew they would! 1113 00:53:33,001 --> 00:53:34,252 Okay, just give me a second. 1114 00:53:34,253 --> 00:53:36,839 [groaning] Yes. Yes. 1115 00:53:37,923 --> 00:53:39,382 - [exclaiming] - Why didn't you wake me up? 1116 00:53:39,383 --> 00:53:40,675 I could have gone with you. 1117 00:53:40,676 --> 00:53:43,261 Because I'm capable! I wanted to be capable! 1118 00:53:43,262 --> 00:53:45,138 [Jamie] Well, maybe I could talk to them. 1119 00:53:45,139 --> 00:53:46,848 [Diane] And do what, something I couldn't? 1120 00:53:46,849 --> 00:53:48,683 No, I-- Did you tell 'em about the list? 1121 00:53:48,684 --> 00:53:50,685 Of course I told them about the list! 1122 00:53:50,686 --> 00:53:53,020 O-Okay, look, you're a little emotional right now. 1123 00:53:53,021 --> 00:53:55,356 What if I go back there and then-- 1124 00:53:55,357 --> 00:53:56,858 and try to reason with them? 1125 00:53:56,859 --> 00:53:58,359 Good luck with Judith Bibbs. 1126 00:53:58,360 --> 00:53:59,527 Who? 1127 00:53:59,528 --> 00:54:01,029 Do these look like chihuahua to you? 1128 00:54:01,864 --> 00:54:04,532 Wait. What? 1129 00:54:04,533 --> 00:54:07,536 [♪ dramatic music playing] 1130 00:54:09,246 --> 00:54:10,247 Diane! 1131 00:54:15,711 --> 00:54:16,712 Diane! 1132 00:54:18,630 --> 00:54:19,882 Diane! 1133 00:54:22,968 --> 00:54:24,218 What are you doing? 1134 00:54:24,219 --> 00:54:25,636 What does it look like I'm doing? 1135 00:54:25,637 --> 00:54:26,971 I'm ending hope. 1136 00:54:26,972 --> 00:54:29,265 - Are you insane? - What? I'm giving her closure. 1137 00:54:29,266 --> 00:54:30,850 Well, you're gonna give her a heart attack. 1138 00:54:30,851 --> 00:54:33,061 Well, she acted like she knew Henry better than me. 1139 00:54:34,730 --> 00:54:36,064 [laughing] 1140 00:54:38,233 --> 00:54:40,818 - Oh, you find this funny? - Yes! Yes, I do. 1141 00:54:40,819 --> 00:54:43,738 I'm watching a woman throw chicken bones into a yard, 1142 00:54:43,739 --> 00:54:47,074 hoping that another woman thinks it's pieces of her chihuahua. 1143 00:54:47,075 --> 00:54:50,162 A chihuahua that got carried off by a hawk. 1144 00:54:51,079 --> 00:54:52,455 [laughing] So, yeah. 1145 00:54:52,456 --> 00:54:53,998 Yeah, yeah, I'm laughing at that. 1146 00:54:53,999 --> 00:54:58,252 [laughing] Well, that's my-- That's my humor. 1147 00:54:58,253 --> 00:54:59,421 [Diane sighs] 1148 00:55:00,255 --> 00:55:01,590 [exhales] 1149 00:55:02,758 --> 00:55:05,969 [sighs] I just wanted it to be what Henry wanted. 1150 00:55:08,972 --> 00:55:10,098 I know. 1151 00:55:11,099 --> 00:55:12,767 [exhales sharply] 1152 00:55:12,768 --> 00:55:14,353 We need to pick up these bones. 1153 00:55:15,771 --> 00:55:17,480 Okay, let's see. 1154 00:55:17,481 --> 00:55:19,023 That's three over here. 1155 00:55:19,024 --> 00:55:20,233 - There's some more. - Oh. 1156 00:55:20,234 --> 00:55:21,609 - I think that is one. - [car horn honking] 1157 00:55:21,610 --> 00:55:22,860 - Oh, shit. - Shit. 1158 00:55:22,861 --> 00:55:23,904 [Judith] Hey! 1159 00:55:24,655 --> 00:55:26,364 - What's going on? - [Diane clearing throat] 1160 00:55:26,365 --> 00:55:27,782 [Diane] Nothing, everything's fine. 1161 00:55:27,783 --> 00:55:29,784 - [laughing] - Um, we were-- 1162 00:55:29,785 --> 00:55:31,869 We were just, um-- I did a... 1163 00:55:31,870 --> 00:55:34,205 [laughing] Where are you going? 1164 00:55:34,206 --> 00:55:36,290 - Um... - [Judith] I didn't hear her. 1165 00:55:36,291 --> 00:55:39,044 I-- No, I-- I thought I left my shirt out here. 1166 00:55:39,878 --> 00:55:42,630 But, uh, nope. 1167 00:55:42,631 --> 00:55:44,174 See you, Judy. 1168 00:55:45,133 --> 00:55:46,467 It's Judith. 1169 00:55:46,468 --> 00:55:49,011 [Jamie and Diane laughing] 1170 00:55:49,012 --> 00:55:51,138 Judith so thinks we're sleeping together. 1171 00:55:51,139 --> 00:55:52,807 [both laughing] 1172 00:55:52,808 --> 00:55:54,308 If God is kind. 1173 00:55:54,309 --> 00:55:55,853 [both chuckle] 1174 00:55:56,854 --> 00:55:58,354 [Jamie sighs] 1175 00:55:58,355 --> 00:56:00,523 [owl hooting] 1176 00:56:00,524 --> 00:56:02,484 You can see so many stars here. 1177 00:56:03,485 --> 00:56:04,486 [Diane] Yeah. 1178 00:56:05,737 --> 00:56:07,239 This part, I don't hate. 1179 00:56:08,156 --> 00:56:10,158 [insects chirring] 1180 00:56:12,661 --> 00:56:13,829 Do you think you'll stay? 1181 00:56:15,163 --> 00:56:16,999 No. There's nothing here. 1182 00:56:24,423 --> 00:56:27,341 Well, as much as I love a liquid dinner... 1183 00:56:27,342 --> 00:56:29,677 - Oh, sure. [sighs] - Will you take care of the fire? 1184 00:56:29,678 --> 00:56:30,679 Yes. 1185 00:56:34,433 --> 00:56:35,851 [smacks legs] Hmm. 1186 00:56:38,103 --> 00:56:39,897 [phone buzzing] 1187 00:56:41,023 --> 00:56:42,691 [phone buzzing] 1188 00:56:48,363 --> 00:56:50,782 [phone buzzing] 1189 00:57:06,381 --> 00:57:07,633 [phone buzzing] 1190 00:57:13,889 --> 00:57:17,975 Would it be crazy if we opened another bottle of wine? 1191 00:57:17,976 --> 00:57:20,896 - Or would that-- - My son wants to know how I took the news. 1192 00:57:21,939 --> 00:57:23,732 "How'd my mom take the news?" 1193 00:57:25,275 --> 00:57:27,069 I assume he's not coming. 1194 00:57:29,404 --> 00:57:30,405 I was gonna tell you. 1195 00:57:31,490 --> 00:57:33,158 Because it's still not safe? 1196 00:57:33,992 --> 00:57:35,243 Yes, unfortunately. 1197 00:57:38,080 --> 00:57:40,164 - Actually, there's more. - Okay, well-- 1198 00:57:40,165 --> 00:57:41,624 Ah. 1199 00:57:41,625 --> 00:57:44,335 "How'd my mom take the news? I imagine she's pissed. 1200 00:57:44,336 --> 00:57:45,504 "But I thought about... 1201 00:57:46,755 --> 00:57:49,465 "what you said, and you're right. 1202 00:57:49,466 --> 00:57:51,842 It's not my responsibility." 1203 00:57:51,843 --> 00:57:53,512 [smacking lips] 1204 00:57:54,596 --> 00:57:56,597 - I can explain. - Open your phone. 1205 00:57:56,598 --> 00:57:59,100 - I-- Diane, I can't. - Fuck your cone of silence. 1206 00:57:59,101 --> 00:58:02,019 "Not my responsibility"? That sounds awfully familiar. 1207 00:58:02,020 --> 00:58:03,145 That's not exactly what I said. 1208 00:58:03,146 --> 00:58:04,480 Well, then let's see what you said. 1209 00:58:04,481 --> 00:58:05,815 Diane, I can explain. 1210 00:58:05,816 --> 00:58:07,608 Nothing you can explain is to be trusted. 1211 00:58:07,609 --> 00:58:10,027 This, I'll trust. Open your phone. 1212 00:58:10,028 --> 00:58:12,113 It's not that easy, Diane, I... 1213 00:58:12,114 --> 00:58:14,156 - [phone clicking] - Great. It is that easy. 1214 00:58:14,157 --> 00:58:15,158 Ah! 1215 00:58:16,868 --> 00:58:18,370 [Diane exhales sharply] 1216 00:58:19,371 --> 00:58:20,997 Hmm. 1217 00:58:20,998 --> 00:58:22,332 Quite an exchange. 1218 00:58:23,500 --> 00:58:24,501 Mm-hmm. 1219 00:58:25,293 --> 00:58:26,794 Hm! 1220 00:58:26,795 --> 00:58:27,962 Wow. [chuckles] 1221 00:58:27,963 --> 00:58:30,006 Apparently, they did get the interview. 1222 00:58:30,007 --> 00:58:32,299 [inhales sharply] "It was a bit harrowing, 1223 00:58:32,300 --> 00:58:34,885 "but we made it in and out safely. 1224 00:58:34,886 --> 00:58:36,304 We're back at the hotel." 1225 00:58:37,389 --> 00:58:39,141 I guess you just misspoke. 1226 00:58:40,475 --> 00:58:41,976 - It did become safe. - Mm-hmm? 1227 00:58:41,977 --> 00:58:43,894 - But then it-- - No, no, no, no, no. No spoilers. 1228 00:58:43,895 --> 00:58:45,063 [inhales deeply] 1229 00:58:49,901 --> 00:58:52,571 Did Tyler actually ponder coming? 1230 00:58:55,741 --> 00:58:58,200 He asked me what I thought he should do. 1231 00:58:58,201 --> 00:58:59,327 "He should do." 1232 00:59:00,245 --> 00:59:03,999 "Your responsibility is to you, Tyler, not anyone else." 1233 00:59:05,333 --> 00:59:07,836 Apparently, that's exactly what you said. Mm-hmm. 1234 00:59:09,254 --> 00:59:12,424 [scoffs] "I'll te--" Oh. "I'll tell her it wasn't safe. 1235 00:59:13,341 --> 00:59:16,343 "She already knows that's a strong possibility. 1236 00:59:16,344 --> 00:59:19,680 I'll handle things here. It'll be fine." 1237 00:59:19,681 --> 00:59:22,850 You didn't just quiet his mind, you made up his mind! 1238 00:59:22,851 --> 00:59:24,894 - I didn't make up-- - "I'm grateful for you, 1239 00:59:24,895 --> 00:59:27,063 but I'm bummed I won't get to see you." 1240 00:59:27,064 --> 00:59:28,564 Aw! 1241 00:59:28,565 --> 00:59:30,441 "Miss you, love you, Jamie." 1242 00:59:30,442 --> 00:59:32,610 "Miss you, love you, Tyler." 1243 00:59:32,611 --> 00:59:34,279 What a great read! 1244 00:59:37,074 --> 00:59:38,075 [Diane sighs] 1245 00:59:42,454 --> 00:59:43,914 - I'm sorry, Diane-- - No! 1246 00:59:47,167 --> 00:59:48,709 I'll, uh, pack my things. 1247 00:59:48,710 --> 00:59:49,710 Why? 1248 00:59:49,711 --> 00:59:50,712 [sighs] 1249 00:59:50,879 --> 00:59:52,880 You think your job is done? 1250 00:59:52,881 --> 00:59:56,217 Well, I think, given the circumstances... 1251 00:59:56,218 --> 00:59:58,135 [Diane] The circumstances? 1252 00:59:58,136 --> 00:59:59,637 The circumstances! 1253 00:59:59,638 --> 01:00:01,931 The circumstances haven't changed! 1254 01:00:01,932 --> 01:00:04,475 Just more disappointment. [chuckles weakly] 1255 01:00:04,476 --> 01:00:07,311 That, I... That, I can manage! 1256 01:00:07,312 --> 01:00:09,063 Plus, like you said, 1257 01:00:09,064 --> 01:00:11,565 "We always knew this was a strong possibility. 1258 01:00:11,566 --> 01:00:13,734 I'll handle things here. It'll be fine." 1259 01:00:13,735 --> 01:00:15,236 Your words! So, yeah, 1260 01:00:15,237 --> 01:00:17,155 you can keep handling things! 1261 01:00:20,992 --> 01:00:22,160 [door slams] 1262 01:00:32,337 --> 01:00:34,339 - [insects chirring] - [birdsong] 1263 01:00:54,943 --> 01:00:57,946 [♪ soft upbeat music playing] 1264 01:01:08,790 --> 01:01:11,041 All of that's not gonna fit in that fridge. 1265 01:01:11,042 --> 01:01:13,043 You're gonna need to transfer everything out of there 1266 01:01:13,044 --> 01:01:14,546 to the one in the garage. 1267 01:01:18,800 --> 01:01:20,510 [sighs] 1268 01:01:26,057 --> 01:01:27,474 I was thinking it might be nice 1269 01:01:27,475 --> 01:01:29,727 to display more of Henry's art at the reception. 1270 01:01:29,728 --> 01:01:32,021 - That's a great idea. - We rent a storage unit. 1271 01:01:32,022 --> 01:01:33,647 I wrote down the address. 1272 01:01:33,648 --> 01:01:35,901 Okay, would you, um, mind putting it on the... 1273 01:01:39,654 --> 01:01:40,989 [door thudding] 1274 01:01:42,741 --> 01:01:44,158 Got it. 1275 01:01:44,159 --> 01:01:45,493 [garage door sliding] 1276 01:02:29,788 --> 01:02:32,791 [♪ gentle music playing] 1277 01:03:06,074 --> 01:03:08,034 [insects chirring] 1278 01:03:14,249 --> 01:03:15,333 [phone chimes] 1279 01:03:23,842 --> 01:03:25,093 [exhales slowly] 1280 01:03:26,428 --> 01:03:28,429 - [light knocking] - [Jamie] Diane? 1281 01:03:28,430 --> 01:03:29,514 I made dinner. 1282 01:03:52,871 --> 01:03:53,872 [cutlery clattering] 1283 01:03:57,959 --> 01:03:59,127 [Jamie sniffling] 1284 01:04:00,211 --> 01:04:01,670 [Diane clearing throat] 1285 01:04:01,671 --> 01:04:03,048 The bartenders confirmed. 1286 01:04:04,299 --> 01:04:07,676 And they can help with, um, with cleanup, too. 1287 01:04:07,677 --> 01:04:08,678 Good. 1288 01:04:12,640 --> 01:04:14,391 So, what time did you want to leave for the-- 1289 01:04:14,392 --> 01:04:16,977 I got a text from Tyler a while ago. 1290 01:04:16,978 --> 01:04:17,979 Mm. 1291 01:04:19,481 --> 01:04:21,732 - Okay. - He said he was thinking of me 1292 01:04:21,733 --> 01:04:24,360 and apologized that he couldn't be here. 1293 01:04:24,361 --> 01:04:27,154 But he's sending thoughts and prayers for tomorrow. 1294 01:04:27,155 --> 01:04:29,699 He also said he would check in when he got back. 1295 01:04:30,742 --> 01:04:32,785 - That's great. - Yeah, it's great 1296 01:04:32,786 --> 01:04:35,497 if you just ignore the fact that it's all a lie. 1297 01:04:36,373 --> 01:04:38,665 Oh, and he sent one last sentence. 1298 01:04:38,666 --> 01:04:41,503 His usual. "Miss you and love you, Mom." 1299 01:04:43,505 --> 01:04:46,673 You get that one, too. I remember reading that. 1300 01:04:46,674 --> 01:04:49,718 At first, I thought it peculiar for a boss and an employee-- 1301 01:04:49,719 --> 01:04:52,388 - Who became friends. - Well, decided on friends, yes, 1302 01:04:52,389 --> 01:04:54,598 but that's why I said at first, I found it peculiar. 1303 01:04:54,599 --> 01:04:56,350 And then I thought, well, 1304 01:04:56,351 --> 01:04:57,894 you do have this history together. 1305 01:04:58,895 --> 01:05:01,939 And this "you loving him, him conflicted" journey. 1306 01:05:01,940 --> 01:05:04,608 So, yes, it's not strange that along the way 1307 01:05:04,609 --> 01:05:06,735 you would start saying that to each other. 1308 01:05:06,736 --> 01:05:09,071 It's how we end our texts. I think it's nice. 1309 01:05:09,072 --> 01:05:11,366 [Diane] Of course, it's sweet. And it works. 1310 01:05:13,034 --> 01:05:15,244 I know Tyler won't check in when he gets back. 1311 01:05:15,245 --> 01:05:18,038 Eventually, yes, but I imagine it'll be a month 1312 01:05:18,039 --> 01:05:19,873 before I hear from him. 1313 01:05:19,874 --> 01:05:21,917 That's what our relationship has become. 1314 01:05:21,918 --> 01:05:25,546 Just large chasms of time pass with no communication, 1315 01:05:25,547 --> 01:05:28,383 and then I'll get the arbitrary text, "Checking in." 1316 01:05:29,384 --> 01:05:31,218 Quite literally, that's how it starts. 1317 01:05:31,219 --> 01:05:33,053 "Checking in." 1318 01:05:33,054 --> 01:05:34,430 And of course, I respond immediately, 1319 01:05:34,431 --> 01:05:35,722 like a mother should, 1320 01:05:35,723 --> 01:05:37,724 and we check in with one another. 1321 01:05:37,725 --> 01:05:40,270 And at the end of it, "Miss you, love you, Mom." 1322 01:05:41,229 --> 01:05:43,272 And like I said, it works. 1323 01:05:43,273 --> 01:05:45,190 It's how he keeps me on the hook. 1324 01:05:45,191 --> 01:05:48,402 It's just enough to make me feel like he still needs me. 1325 01:05:48,403 --> 01:05:50,904 Just enough to keep me from giving up completely 1326 01:05:50,905 --> 01:05:52,906 and letting go for good. 1327 01:05:52,907 --> 01:05:54,324 And I imagine for Tyler, 1328 01:05:54,325 --> 01:05:56,743 just enough to ease his own guilt, 1329 01:05:56,744 --> 01:05:58,997 the guilt he feels for hurting me. 1330 01:06:01,749 --> 01:06:03,001 For hurting us? 1331 01:06:04,169 --> 01:06:05,462 [Jamie] I know it to be genuine. 1332 01:06:06,337 --> 01:06:07,963 I didn't say it wasn't genuine. 1333 01:06:07,964 --> 01:06:10,257 I just think it's more complicated than that. 1334 01:06:10,258 --> 01:06:12,134 Do you not find it more complicated 1335 01:06:12,135 --> 01:06:14,094 when you read his "Miss you, love you," in a text? 1336 01:06:14,095 --> 01:06:15,471 And when you have to type it back, 1337 01:06:15,472 --> 01:06:17,264 it doesn't feel confusing to you, 1338 01:06:17,265 --> 01:06:19,433 after everything that's happened between the two of you? 1339 01:06:19,434 --> 01:06:20,642 [Jamie] No. 1340 01:06:20,643 --> 01:06:22,311 [Diane] Even after you shared your feelings 1341 01:06:22,312 --> 01:06:23,812 and he wasn't there yet? 1342 01:06:23,813 --> 01:06:26,106 Even after he was seemingly there 1343 01:06:26,107 --> 01:06:27,650 and then took it all back? 1344 01:06:29,152 --> 01:06:30,319 No. 1345 01:06:30,320 --> 01:06:31,778 Well, I guess-- [chuckles] 1346 01:06:31,779 --> 01:06:33,947 I guess I'm just speaking for myself here. 1347 01:06:33,948 --> 01:06:37,284 I just find it hard to imagine how genuine it can be 1348 01:06:37,285 --> 01:06:39,119 when my son refuses to come, 1349 01:06:39,120 --> 01:06:41,830 and yet texts, "Miss you, love you, Mom." 1350 01:06:41,831 --> 01:06:43,290 Now, of course, he's under the assumption 1351 01:06:43,291 --> 01:06:45,375 that the lie didn't get screwed up. 1352 01:06:45,376 --> 01:06:47,794 As far as Tyler is concerned, 1353 01:06:47,795 --> 01:06:50,506 he thinks I believe he's been prohibited from coming 1354 01:06:50,507 --> 01:06:52,841 due to circumstances. 1355 01:06:52,842 --> 01:06:55,511 So, for Tyler, he's comforted by the fact 1356 01:06:55,512 --> 01:06:57,804 that his mom should have no doubt that he misses her 1357 01:06:57,805 --> 01:07:01,309 and loves her on the day before she buries her second husband. 1358 01:07:01,976 --> 01:07:04,061 But then, of course, you made up his mind for him. 1359 01:07:04,062 --> 01:07:06,522 So, yeah, who the fuck knows what "Miss you, love you," means anymore? 1360 01:07:06,523 --> 01:07:08,899 - I-- I didn't make up his mind. - No, you gave him an out. 1361 01:07:08,900 --> 01:07:11,360 No, he asked my opinion. He didn't have to take it. 1362 01:07:11,361 --> 01:07:13,738 [Diane] And why was your opinion for him not to come? 1363 01:07:14,572 --> 01:07:16,198 I didn't tell him not to come. 1364 01:07:16,199 --> 01:07:18,659 [Diane] Yes, you told him that it wasn't his responsibility-- 1365 01:07:18,660 --> 01:07:21,161 No. No, I said he had a responsibility 1366 01:07:21,162 --> 01:07:23,038 - to himself. - And I told you 1367 01:07:23,039 --> 01:07:25,082 - he had a responsibility... - Yes, that he had a responsibility to you. 1368 01:07:25,083 --> 01:07:26,875 - ...to me. - Yes, yeah, but okay. 1369 01:07:26,876 --> 01:07:28,627 Diane, are we really gonna do this? 1370 01:07:28,628 --> 01:07:31,547 Are we really gonna break down the subtext of a text? 1371 01:07:31,548 --> 01:07:34,341 Yes, because now I'm ready for my explanation. 1372 01:07:34,342 --> 01:07:36,510 - You're not gonna like it. - Yeah, I hate it so far. 1373 01:07:36,511 --> 01:07:39,429 I did what I thought was right, knowing what I know. 1374 01:07:39,430 --> 01:07:41,390 - Knowing what? - How Tyler feels 1375 01:07:41,391 --> 01:07:43,517 about everything that happened between the two of you. 1376 01:07:43,518 --> 01:07:44,726 Which is what? 1377 01:07:44,727 --> 01:07:46,395 [sighs] 1378 01:07:46,396 --> 01:07:47,813 [Diane] Oh, but of course. 1379 01:07:47,814 --> 01:07:50,357 Now, we're back to your airtight cone of silence. 1380 01:07:50,358 --> 01:07:52,192 Fine, I'll lift it from my side. 1381 01:07:52,193 --> 01:07:54,861 I cheated on Tyler's dad with Henry. 1382 01:07:54,862 --> 01:07:56,989 - I assume that you know? - Yes. 1383 01:07:56,990 --> 01:07:59,283 And did he also share with you that his dad and I 1384 01:07:59,284 --> 01:08:01,410 had fallen out of love long before that, 1385 01:08:01,411 --> 01:08:03,370 and that his dad had cheated as well? 1386 01:08:03,371 --> 01:08:05,706 - Y-Yes, but-- - But his affair was fleeting 1387 01:08:05,707 --> 01:08:07,375 and I fell in love with mine, yes? 1388 01:08:08,751 --> 01:08:10,127 - Yes. - Yes. 1389 01:08:10,128 --> 01:08:11,379 That's my high crime. 1390 01:08:12,130 --> 01:08:14,965 Well, I think for Tyler, knowing how hurt his dad was, 1391 01:08:14,966 --> 01:08:18,051 and then with Tyler's dad passing away, 1392 01:08:18,052 --> 01:08:19,886 I think that there is an allegiance to his father 1393 01:08:19,887 --> 01:08:21,763 that makes it difficult for Tyler to-- 1394 01:08:21,764 --> 01:08:24,766 - Look, Dia-- your son struggles with how-- - [scoffs] My son struggles. 1395 01:08:24,767 --> 01:08:27,311 - [chair scraping] - Oh, my God. Lost my appetite. 1396 01:08:27,312 --> 01:08:29,980 - Diane, just let me-- - No, no! 1397 01:08:29,981 --> 01:08:32,274 No, Tyler did have an allegiance to his dad, 1398 01:08:32,275 --> 01:08:34,943 and still does to this day, apparently. 1399 01:08:34,944 --> 01:08:36,069 [smacks countertop] 1400 01:08:36,070 --> 01:08:37,238 [groaning] 1401 01:08:38,239 --> 01:08:42,242 After his father and I divorced, despite both cheating, 1402 01:08:42,243 --> 01:08:44,244 despite our anger and differences, 1403 01:08:44,245 --> 01:08:46,079 the one thing we agreed upon 1404 01:08:46,080 --> 01:08:48,498 was that our priority was to be Tyler. 1405 01:08:48,499 --> 01:08:50,459 He should know nothing from us but love, 1406 01:08:50,460 --> 01:08:52,336 and that included to each other. 1407 01:08:52,337 --> 01:08:53,420 [groaning] 1408 01:08:53,421 --> 01:08:54,421 [bowl clatters] 1409 01:08:54,422 --> 01:08:55,589 I hate that I'm telling you this! 1410 01:08:55,590 --> 01:08:58,008 - You don't have to tell me. - Yes, I do! 1411 01:08:58,009 --> 01:08:59,427 [Diane whimpers] 1412 01:09:04,182 --> 01:09:07,225 Around the time Henry and I moved in together, 1413 01:09:07,226 --> 01:09:09,811 when things were clearly not fleeting for us, 1414 01:09:09,812 --> 01:09:12,357 Tyler's dad began to struggle with that. 1415 01:09:13,316 --> 01:09:16,735 One weekend, when Tyler was at his dad's, 1416 01:09:16,736 --> 01:09:18,946 you want to know what he put in our son's head? 1417 01:09:20,490 --> 01:09:24,117 "You're on my side. You're on your dad's side." 1418 01:09:24,118 --> 01:09:26,703 You know what that does to a nine-year-old to draw that line? 1419 01:09:26,704 --> 01:09:28,372 To suggest that love is conditional? 1420 01:09:28,373 --> 01:09:30,290 Because I can tell you from experience, 1421 01:09:30,291 --> 01:09:32,376 you do not come back from that. 1422 01:09:32,377 --> 01:09:34,294 The damage is done. 1423 01:09:34,295 --> 01:09:36,963 And I only came to know of what his dad said a few years later 1424 01:09:36,964 --> 01:09:39,341 when Tyler was acting out and I sent him to his room. 1425 01:09:39,342 --> 01:09:41,385 He used his dad's words against me. 1426 01:09:41,386 --> 01:09:42,929 "I'm on dad's side." 1427 01:09:43,930 --> 01:09:46,556 But truthfully, I was suspicious that something had been said 1428 01:09:46,557 --> 01:09:49,351 from the moment my nine-year-old came home after that weekend, 1429 01:09:49,352 --> 01:09:53,146 because the son who left was not the son who came back. 1430 01:09:53,147 --> 01:09:56,692 Not the way he looked at me, the way he hugged me. 1431 01:09:56,693 --> 01:09:58,860 He would bristle at my touch. 1432 01:09:58,861 --> 01:10:02,364 A-And Henry, Henry was a pariah from that day on. 1433 01:10:02,365 --> 01:10:03,533 [groaning] 1434 01:10:04,492 --> 01:10:06,201 I'm sorry, Diane. I didn't know. 1435 01:10:06,202 --> 01:10:07,494 And you wouldn't have, not from me. 1436 01:10:07,495 --> 01:10:10,372 I never told anyone, until now. 1437 01:10:10,373 --> 01:10:13,083 Not even Henry. Even after I came to know 1438 01:10:13,084 --> 01:10:15,001 what his dad had said, I never confronted him. 1439 01:10:15,002 --> 01:10:19,381 Never uttered a negative thing about him in retaliation. 1440 01:10:19,382 --> 01:10:23,343 Even as Tyler used those words against me, I stayed calm. 1441 01:10:23,344 --> 01:10:26,513 All I said was, "Well, I hope you know 1442 01:10:26,514 --> 01:10:28,349 that Henry and I love you, too." 1443 01:10:30,351 --> 01:10:34,105 Even after Tyler refused to let me go to his dad's funeral. 1444 01:10:35,356 --> 01:10:38,233 [sobbing] I mean, this is a man I loved, 1445 01:10:38,234 --> 01:10:39,609 I still love! 1446 01:10:39,610 --> 01:10:41,778 Even then, I respected my son's feelings, 1447 01:10:41,779 --> 01:10:46,200 and I sat out on that patio, and I grieved his dad alone. 1448 01:10:47,243 --> 01:10:49,536 From the moment my nine-year-old came home after that weekend, 1449 01:10:49,537 --> 01:10:51,538 I have shown him nothing but love, 1450 01:10:51,539 --> 01:10:53,248 because I knew he needed it. 1451 01:10:53,249 --> 01:10:56,209 I knew he wanted it, and still does to this day. 1452 01:10:56,210 --> 01:10:59,045 It just-- it just comes with a price. 1453 01:10:59,046 --> 01:11:01,631 But I have never, never stopped being his mom. 1454 01:11:01,632 --> 01:11:03,925 I've-- I have stayed his mom. 1455 01:11:03,926 --> 01:11:05,761 And-- and against my better judgment, 1456 01:11:05,762 --> 01:11:07,429 I have kept helping Tyler 1457 01:11:07,430 --> 01:11:09,724 through any doorway he struggles with. 1458 01:11:11,225 --> 01:11:13,810 Now, as for you, 1459 01:11:13,811 --> 01:11:16,730 just so you're clear going forward with your life, 1460 01:11:16,731 --> 01:11:19,609 just so you come to truly understand... 1461 01:11:20,902 --> 01:11:23,780 that is a cone of silence. 1462 01:11:26,991 --> 01:11:30,619 Diane, I'm very sorry for what you went through, 1463 01:11:30,620 --> 01:11:32,329 and I'm sorry for what you're going through. 1464 01:11:32,330 --> 01:11:33,914 But again, I didn't know. 1465 01:11:33,915 --> 01:11:37,083 What about what we've come to know, what we've shared here? 1466 01:11:37,084 --> 01:11:39,127 - Going on that alone, why not tell Tyler-- - Diane, I-- 1467 01:11:39,128 --> 01:11:40,587 You could have texted him yourself, 1468 01:11:40,588 --> 01:11:42,506 but instead, you chose to stay angry. 1469 01:11:42,507 --> 01:11:44,674 Yeah, and you chose to be on his side. 1470 01:11:44,675 --> 01:11:48,094 Oh, my God. I love that you refuse to listen 1471 01:11:48,095 --> 01:11:50,806 to anything that doesn't allow you to stay the victim. 1472 01:11:50,807 --> 01:11:52,974 - I'm just trying to understand. - What you need to do 1473 01:11:52,975 --> 01:11:55,602 is recognize that I have been here for six days 1474 01:11:55,603 --> 01:11:58,438 helping you, enduring you, taking dagger after dagger. 1475 01:11:58,439 --> 01:11:59,689 What about the daggers I've taken? 1476 01:11:59,690 --> 01:12:00,941 Well, I'm not disputing that, 1477 01:12:00,942 --> 01:12:02,275 but I'm not the one who threw them. 1478 01:12:02,276 --> 01:12:04,027 - Yes, you did! - No, not the ones 1479 01:12:04,028 --> 01:12:06,279 that hurt you most. I'm not your son, Diane. 1480 01:12:06,280 --> 01:12:07,697 No. You're worse. 1481 01:12:07,698 --> 01:12:09,616 - You're in love with him. - Oh, my God. 1482 01:12:09,617 --> 01:12:11,619 - Diane, I told you-- - No. Nope. 1483 01:12:12,537 --> 01:12:14,621 - Fuck your story. - Wow. 1484 01:12:14,622 --> 01:12:16,289 Wow, fuck my story. 1485 01:12:16,290 --> 01:12:18,792 You are so clearly still in love with my son. 1486 01:12:18,793 --> 01:12:20,293 - I am not. - Had I known that, 1487 01:12:20,294 --> 01:12:22,379 I would have relieved you on day one. 1488 01:12:22,380 --> 01:12:23,505 Well, then, relieve me now. 1489 01:12:23,506 --> 01:12:24,798 - Please. - And give you the satisfaction 1490 01:12:24,799 --> 01:12:26,508 of just walking away? Hell, no! 1491 01:12:26,509 --> 01:12:28,301 Yeah, you wouldn't do that. And you know what, Diane? 1492 01:12:28,302 --> 01:12:30,804 - [scoffs] - You wouldn't have because you've enjoyed all of this. 1493 01:12:30,805 --> 01:12:33,014 - Goading me, tormenting me. - [scoffs] I most certainly have not. 1494 01:12:33,015 --> 01:12:35,183 Please, you get off on your power. 1495 01:12:35,184 --> 01:12:37,310 I have a right to get off! 1496 01:12:37,311 --> 01:12:40,021 - And had I known how miserable this was all gonna be... - Shit. 1497 01:12:40,022 --> 01:12:42,316 ...I never would have offered to come here in the first place! 1498 01:12:44,694 --> 01:12:45,695 "Offered"? 1499 01:12:46,988 --> 01:12:48,989 - What do you mean, "offered"? - Okay, wait. 1500 01:12:48,990 --> 01:12:51,658 You had to come, you had no choice. 1501 01:12:51,659 --> 01:12:54,160 - Yes, but... - This is your job. 1502 01:12:54,161 --> 01:12:57,163 You have to be here. You said that many times. 1503 01:12:57,164 --> 01:13:00,166 - Just hold on! - Adamantly! Did-- did my son 1504 01:13:00,167 --> 01:13:02,085 - even ask you to come? - Hold on. 1505 01:13:02,086 --> 01:13:04,504 Did Tyler even ask you 1506 01:13:04,505 --> 01:13:06,006 - to come, ever? - It's complicated! 1507 01:13:06,007 --> 01:13:07,008 [Diane] Unbelievable. 1508 01:13:07,842 --> 01:13:10,176 [Jamie] Okay, okay. Tyler called. 1509 01:13:10,177 --> 01:13:12,512 He was stuck overseas, he was distraught, 1510 01:13:12,513 --> 01:13:14,014 - he didn't know who else to call. - Mm-hmm. 1511 01:13:14,015 --> 01:13:16,725 He apologized for calling, admitted it was awkward. 1512 01:13:16,726 --> 01:13:19,019 - Why would it be awkward? - Because it had been a while 1513 01:13:19,020 --> 01:13:20,687 - since we had spoken, but-- - Wait. 1514 01:13:20,688 --> 01:13:23,858 How long ago did Tyler break your heart and you walked away? 1515 01:13:26,944 --> 01:13:29,154 - About two weeks, but-- - Two weeks?! 1516 01:13:29,155 --> 01:13:31,197 - Yes, it was earlier than-- - There is no way 1517 01:13:31,198 --> 01:13:32,949 - you have moved on. - Yes, I have. 1518 01:13:32,950 --> 01:13:35,452 In fact, this road trip, this longer trip, 1519 01:13:35,453 --> 01:13:38,622 that's me moving to New York. I'm not even going back to LA. 1520 01:13:38,623 --> 01:13:41,416 Hold on, hold on. So, the day you walked away 1521 01:13:41,417 --> 01:13:43,710 to give yourself time, you actually quit? 1522 01:13:43,711 --> 01:13:45,545 - Yes. - Then, why not own that 1523 01:13:45,546 --> 01:13:47,047 from the minute you walked in my door? 1524 01:13:47,048 --> 01:13:48,298 - Why lie to me? - It was just-- 1525 01:13:48,299 --> 01:13:50,258 "This is my job. I have to be here." 1526 01:13:50,259 --> 01:13:52,802 - It was just easier. - Yes, I imagine it was, 1527 01:13:52,803 --> 01:13:54,471 so much easier to portray yourself 1528 01:13:54,472 --> 01:13:56,431 as this self-righteous victim 1529 01:13:56,432 --> 01:13:57,891 - who's had to endure-- - No, I decided 1530 01:13:57,892 --> 01:13:59,559 to put aside everything 1531 01:13:59,560 --> 01:14:01,603 and take the high road, Diane. 1532 01:14:01,604 --> 01:14:03,146 - Oh. - So that Tyler could see, 1533 01:14:03,147 --> 01:14:05,231 despite all of the hurt I endured, 1534 01:14:05,232 --> 01:14:07,275 I would still be there for him. 1535 01:14:07,276 --> 01:14:09,069 And that I could move on with my life 1536 01:14:09,070 --> 01:14:11,614 knowing I was leaving Tyler behind seeing that about me. 1537 01:14:14,742 --> 01:14:16,326 [scoffs] 1538 01:14:16,327 --> 01:14:18,578 Yes. Yes. 1539 01:14:18,579 --> 01:14:21,998 - Yes. That is why. - What? 1540 01:14:21,999 --> 01:14:23,833 - You resent him. - Oh, plea-- No. 1541 01:14:23,834 --> 01:14:25,752 You're not just in love with my son. 1542 01:14:25,753 --> 01:14:27,212 You resent him. 1543 01:14:27,213 --> 01:14:28,922 - I am taking the high road. - Which is where you go 1544 01:14:28,923 --> 01:14:31,091 when you want people to feel like shit. 1545 01:14:31,092 --> 01:14:32,759 Don't tell me about the high road. 1546 01:14:32,760 --> 01:14:34,928 I wrote the book on taking the high road. 1547 01:14:34,929 --> 01:14:36,680 You want Tyler to feel guilty. 1548 01:14:36,681 --> 01:14:38,640 - Fine. Yes, I do. - [scoffs] 1549 01:14:38,641 --> 01:14:41,601 - But that's not why I came. - It's exactly why you came. 1550 01:14:41,602 --> 01:14:43,520 You want Tyler to miss you. 1551 01:14:43,521 --> 01:14:45,105 You want Tyler to love you. 1552 01:14:45,106 --> 01:14:46,773 - You won't realize-- - I'm moving on with my life-- 1553 01:14:46,774 --> 01:14:48,818 Do not lie anymore! 1554 01:14:49,652 --> 01:14:52,612 Especially to someone who knows exactly what it means 1555 01:14:52,613 --> 01:14:55,115 to love and resent my son. 1556 01:14:55,116 --> 01:14:57,742 And when we love and resent the same person, 1557 01:14:57,743 --> 01:14:59,829 that's when they control us the most. 1558 01:15:00,705 --> 01:15:03,999 Jamie, you will always be everything Tyler needs, 1559 01:15:04,000 --> 01:15:06,459 everything he desires in a boyfriend. 1560 01:15:06,460 --> 01:15:08,461 But you will never be his type. 1561 01:15:08,462 --> 01:15:11,132 He will never want you the way you want him to. 1562 01:15:15,511 --> 01:15:18,639 And he will never be the son that you want him to be. 1563 01:15:20,850 --> 01:15:23,977 You might not call Tyler a selfish, ungrateful dickhead 1564 01:15:23,978 --> 01:15:25,687 to his face, but he can feel it. 1565 01:15:25,688 --> 01:15:28,148 He can see it in your face, he can hear it in your voice. 1566 01:15:28,149 --> 01:15:30,150 He can read it in your texts. 1567 01:15:30,151 --> 01:15:32,235 But yet, you're floored 1568 01:15:32,236 --> 01:15:34,487 that he doesn't want to come running back to your arms. 1569 01:15:34,488 --> 01:15:37,449 - I am his mother! - Well, then fight like one! 1570 01:15:37,450 --> 01:15:38,992 Fight for him instead of tearing me down, 1571 01:15:38,993 --> 01:15:40,201 which is easier, right? 1572 01:15:40,202 --> 01:15:41,911 It's easier to make the pain about anything-- 1573 01:15:41,912 --> 01:15:42,996 anyone but you. 1574 01:15:42,997 --> 01:15:44,999 - Get out! - Happily, thank you! 1575 01:15:45,958 --> 01:15:49,961 But you know what, Diane? You are where you are by choice. 1576 01:15:49,962 --> 01:15:53,006 And you made that choice the second that nine-year-old came home 1577 01:15:53,007 --> 01:15:55,175 and you chose not to fight. 1578 01:15:55,176 --> 01:15:57,010 And you had every right to fight. 1579 01:15:57,011 --> 01:15:59,012 You had every right to march up to his father 1580 01:15:59,013 --> 01:16:00,680 and say, "What the hell were you thinking?" 1581 01:16:00,681 --> 01:16:03,391 But no. Instead, you chose resentment. 1582 01:16:03,392 --> 01:16:06,436 And from what I can tell, you always choose resentment. 1583 01:16:06,437 --> 01:16:09,189 You choose resentment of-- of-- of New Mexico, 1584 01:16:09,190 --> 01:16:11,357 of-- of-- of Kathy's shitty succulent, 1585 01:16:11,358 --> 01:16:13,359 of-- of-- of Judith's dead dog, 1586 01:16:13,360 --> 01:16:15,528 of the goddamn owl, and me! 1587 01:16:15,529 --> 01:16:17,405 - As I should! - Oh, oh, yes. 1588 01:16:17,406 --> 01:16:20,492 No, I am your holy grail of resentment. 1589 01:16:20,493 --> 01:16:23,411 And what an easy place to put all of your anger and resentment, 1590 01:16:23,412 --> 01:16:25,455 the week you have to bury your second husband, 1591 01:16:25,456 --> 01:16:27,123 instead of facing the ugly truth 1592 01:16:27,124 --> 01:16:28,875 that you're angry and resentful of Henry 1593 01:16:28,876 --> 01:16:31,544 - for having to bury him. - How dare you! 1594 01:16:31,545 --> 01:16:33,339 Don't lie to me, Diane. 1595 01:16:34,048 --> 01:16:36,216 Especially to somebody who knows what it feels like 1596 01:16:36,217 --> 01:16:39,135 to spend years of your life watching the only people 1597 01:16:39,136 --> 01:16:40,971 you have left in the world leave. 1598 01:16:43,432 --> 01:16:46,977 And we do, we resent them because we need them here. 1599 01:16:48,979 --> 01:16:51,398 Because we don't know who we are without them. 1600 01:16:52,650 --> 01:16:55,902 [sniffles] You said it yourself, Diane. 1601 01:16:55,903 --> 01:16:57,779 You hate how you were with Henry. 1602 01:16:57,780 --> 01:16:59,405 You hated him for putting you there. 1603 01:16:59,406 --> 01:17:01,658 And yet this whole time, you had somebody looking at you 1604 01:17:01,659 --> 01:17:03,034 with nothing but love, begging you 1605 01:17:03,035 --> 01:17:04,787 to get out of a place you refuse to leave. 1606 01:17:05,579 --> 01:17:08,081 A place that you-- you choose to be consumed 1607 01:17:08,082 --> 01:17:10,250 by the love you're not getting from a son who left 1608 01:17:10,251 --> 01:17:12,335 rather than grieving the loss of a man 1609 01:17:12,336 --> 01:17:14,672 who knew everything about you and stayed. 1610 01:17:27,268 --> 01:17:28,269 [sniffling] 1611 01:17:32,106 --> 01:17:33,149 [sniffling] 1612 01:17:36,026 --> 01:17:39,029 [♪ upbeat dramatic music playing] 1613 01:17:51,333 --> 01:17:52,793 Here's the sun. 1614 01:17:59,800 --> 01:18:01,135 There's the fucking sky! 1615 01:18:03,304 --> 01:18:06,307 And there's the goddamn owl. 1616 01:18:09,518 --> 01:18:12,812 Bringing back the fucking cat! 1617 01:18:12,813 --> 01:18:13,814 [brush clattering] 1618 01:18:16,525 --> 01:18:18,527 [breathing heavily] 1619 01:18:20,404 --> 01:18:21,864 - I didn't mean to-- - [scoffs] 1620 01:18:22,740 --> 01:18:23,824 Let's be done. 1621 01:18:25,868 --> 01:18:28,871 [♪ gentle music playing] 1622 01:18:31,582 --> 01:18:32,833 [door closes] 1623 01:18:35,586 --> 01:18:37,171 [insects chirring] 1624 01:18:40,174 --> 01:18:43,177 [♪ gentle music continues playing] 1625 01:19:13,749 --> 01:19:15,959 [Henry] Hey, lady. Just got out of church. 1626 01:19:15,960 --> 01:19:18,044 What are you doing? 1627 01:19:18,045 --> 01:19:20,588 [Henry chuckles] I know that annoys you 1628 01:19:20,589 --> 01:19:22,758 - when I ask your voicemail questions. - [Diane chuckles] 1629 01:19:23,968 --> 01:19:25,718 I, uh, I just wanted to let you know 1630 01:19:25,719 --> 01:19:27,595 I'm gonna grab lunch with a couple of friends, 1631 01:19:27,596 --> 01:19:29,222 and I'll walk home. 1632 01:19:29,223 --> 01:19:31,766 Oh, uh, in case I forget, 1633 01:19:31,767 --> 01:19:33,393 a newer member of the congregation 1634 01:19:33,394 --> 01:19:35,311 asked me today how we met. 1635 01:19:35,312 --> 01:19:37,063 And I said, "Well, we didn't meet. 1636 01:19:37,064 --> 01:19:38,482 Diane discovered me." 1637 01:19:39,483 --> 01:19:41,068 Now, how sweet of me was that? 1638 01:19:42,486 --> 01:19:44,238 Alright, I love you. I'll see you soon. 1639 01:19:46,240 --> 01:19:48,491 Oh, uh, uh, one more thing. 1640 01:19:48,492 --> 01:19:50,911 What are you doing? [Henry chuckles] 1641 01:19:53,956 --> 01:19:56,959 [♪ gentle music continues playing] 1642 01:20:04,967 --> 01:20:06,969 [birdsong] 1643 01:20:27,031 --> 01:20:30,034 [♪ gentle music continues playing] 1644 01:21:21,001 --> 01:21:27,048 [choir singing] ♪ Just to take Him at his word ♪ 1645 01:21:27,049 --> 01:21:33,554 ♪ Just to rest upon His promise ♪ 1646 01:21:33,555 --> 01:21:40,229 ♪ Just to know thus saith the Lord ♪ 1647 01:21:43,065 --> 01:21:47,861 ♪ Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him ♪ 1648 01:21:49,196 --> 01:21:54,326 ♪ How I've proved Him o'er and o'er ♪ 1649 01:21:55,077 --> 01:22:00,790 ♪ Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus ♪ 1650 01:22:00,791 --> 01:22:05,628 ♪ Oh, the grace to trust Him ♪ 1651 01:22:05,629 --> 01:22:10,133 ♪ More ♪ 1652 01:22:10,134 --> 01:22:11,718 [softly] Good Lord. 1653 01:22:19,601 --> 01:22:20,811 [sighs] 1654 01:22:30,320 --> 01:22:32,572 I wasn't going to get up here. 1655 01:22:32,573 --> 01:22:34,907 Henry would not expect it. [chuckles] 1656 01:22:34,908 --> 01:22:37,076 - [scattered chuckles] - In fact, he's-- 1657 01:22:37,077 --> 01:22:39,079 He's probably rolling his eyes right now. 1658 01:22:40,456 --> 01:22:42,583 But he was clear about... 1659 01:22:44,126 --> 01:22:47,754 what he wanted... from me. [chuckles] 1660 01:22:52,342 --> 01:22:54,428 And I need to finish that. 1661 01:23:01,268 --> 01:23:03,187 "The first, my last... 1662 01:23:04,771 --> 01:23:05,939 "my everything. 1663 01:23:07,858 --> 01:23:09,943 "And the answer to all my dreams. 1664 01:23:12,821 --> 01:23:16,283 "You are my sun, my moon... 1665 01:23:17,284 --> 01:23:18,702 my guiding star." 1666 01:23:22,956 --> 01:23:23,957 Um... 1667 01:23:24,958 --> 01:23:27,169 ♪ My... my... ♪ 1668 01:23:30,672 --> 01:23:31,673 ♪ My ♪ 1669 01:23:32,633 --> 01:23:35,969 ♪ My, my kind of wonderful ♪ 1670 01:23:37,304 --> 01:23:39,848 ♪ That's what you are ♪ 1671 01:23:42,643 --> 01:23:46,480 ♪ I know there's only ♪ 1672 01:23:47,356 --> 01:23:48,982 ♪ One like you ♪ 1673 01:23:52,486 --> 01:23:53,820 ♪ There's no way ♪ 1674 01:23:54,988 --> 01:23:57,491 [choking up] ♪ They could have made two ♪ 1675 01:24:00,911 --> 01:24:02,871 [breathing shakily] 1676 01:24:05,749 --> 01:24:09,545 "Yeah, you're all I'm living for." 1677 01:24:12,673 --> 01:24:16,593 ♪ Your love I'll keep for evermore ♪ 1678 01:24:18,428 --> 01:24:21,347 - ♪ You're the first ♪ - ♪ You're the first ♪ 1679 01:24:21,348 --> 01:24:22,933 - ♪ You're the last ♪ - ♪ You're the last ♪ 1680 01:24:24,351 --> 01:24:26,436 ♪ My everything ♪ 1681 01:24:28,855 --> 01:24:30,690 - You should join the choir. - I can't, it's not really-- 1682 01:24:30,691 --> 01:24:32,233 - Oh. - That was beautiful. 1683 01:24:32,234 --> 01:24:34,235 - I'll see you back at the house. You have the address? - Yeah. 1684 01:24:34,236 --> 01:24:35,903 Okay, great. 1685 01:24:35,904 --> 01:24:37,030 Jamie. 1686 01:24:38,782 --> 01:24:41,617 Can you grab Henry for me and the floral arrangements? 1687 01:24:41,618 --> 01:24:43,953 They'll balk at that. Traditionally, you're supposed to donate them 1688 01:24:43,954 --> 01:24:47,040 for Sunday services, but just tell them God owes me. 1689 01:24:49,418 --> 01:24:51,419 Anyways, I'm bringing my famous deviled eggs. 1690 01:24:51,420 --> 01:24:52,795 Oh, please don't. 1691 01:24:52,796 --> 01:24:54,088 [guest] It's right over here. 1692 01:24:54,089 --> 01:24:56,091 [people chattering] 1693 01:25:01,096 --> 01:25:04,099 [♪ soft classical music playing over speakers] 1694 01:25:06,560 --> 01:25:08,894 Have you ever seen so much joy on a canvas? 1695 01:25:08,895 --> 01:25:11,898 - [sighs] It's something. - Mm. 1696 01:25:13,066 --> 01:25:16,068 - Oh, what's happening here? - Oh, that's an owl 1697 01:25:16,069 --> 01:25:18,279 bringing back our cat, Barnaby, so... 1698 01:25:18,280 --> 01:25:21,241 - Oh. My. - So, like I said, just joy. 1699 01:25:23,076 --> 01:25:25,411 - It's beautiful. - Aw. 1700 01:25:25,412 --> 01:25:28,331 It warms my heart to hear you say that. 1701 01:25:28,332 --> 01:25:30,249 Because Henry wanted you to have it. 1702 01:25:30,250 --> 01:25:31,751 - No. - Yes. 1703 01:25:31,752 --> 01:25:33,586 - N-No. - His time in the choir 1704 01:25:33,587 --> 01:25:35,172 was so precious to him. 1705 01:25:36,089 --> 01:25:38,090 So, maybe for the choir room. 1706 01:25:38,091 --> 01:25:39,800 Ohh. 1707 01:25:39,801 --> 01:25:41,177 - Yeah? - Hmm. 1708 01:25:41,178 --> 01:25:43,180 It'll be like he's still there singing with you. 1709 01:25:49,019 --> 01:25:50,020 Hmm. 1710 01:25:51,813 --> 01:25:52,939 [softly] God bless. 1711 01:25:57,110 --> 01:25:58,611 - Travel well. - Thanks, Diane. 1712 01:25:58,612 --> 01:26:00,280 - Mm-hmm, bye. - We're here if you need anything. 1713 01:26:11,291 --> 01:26:13,626 [Jamie] For some reason, people thought they should bring 1714 01:26:13,627 --> 01:26:15,044 more casseroles. 1715 01:26:15,045 --> 01:26:16,338 [chuckles softly] I saw that. 1716 01:26:17,631 --> 01:26:20,675 Uh, I washed these and labeled whose whose. 1717 01:26:20,676 --> 01:26:23,552 And, um, I made a list of what everybody brought, 1718 01:26:23,553 --> 01:26:25,472 in case you wanna send thank you notes. 1719 01:26:26,723 --> 01:26:28,849 Yeah, that doesn't have to be a thing. 1720 01:26:28,850 --> 01:26:29,851 [paper crumpling] 1721 01:26:31,895 --> 01:26:34,772 Well, I should probably get on the road, 1722 01:26:34,773 --> 01:26:36,316 give you back your space. 1723 01:26:37,818 --> 01:26:39,319 Not much light left, so... 1724 01:26:40,320 --> 01:26:42,655 um, if you get tired, pull over. 1725 01:26:42,656 --> 01:26:43,657 Yes. 1726 01:26:45,534 --> 01:26:46,702 Uh, mm. 1727 01:26:48,328 --> 01:26:51,081 Maybe I'll see you back in New York? 1728 01:26:52,833 --> 01:26:54,042 Maybe. 1729 01:26:59,256 --> 01:27:00,507 Goodbye, Jamie. 1730 01:27:03,552 --> 01:27:04,886 Goodbye, Diane. 1731 01:27:11,017 --> 01:27:12,018 Hm. 1732 01:27:15,856 --> 01:27:17,690 [sniffling softly] 1733 01:27:17,691 --> 01:27:19,693 [liquid pouring] 1734 01:27:50,432 --> 01:27:52,100 I know what's on the other side. 1735 01:27:53,643 --> 01:27:55,895 For me, I know what's on the other side. 1736 01:27:55,896 --> 01:27:58,607 And I know it's better. 1737 01:28:00,108 --> 01:28:01,276 Or it will be better. 1738 01:28:03,987 --> 01:28:05,572 But I stay over here... 1739 01:28:06,948 --> 01:28:08,408 because I wanna fix it. 1740 01:28:10,744 --> 01:28:13,079 'Cause I need to fi-- I need to fix everything. 1741 01:28:15,791 --> 01:28:19,336 Over here, I-- I came out in my 20s. 1742 01:28:21,004 --> 01:28:23,255 And I had my own revolving door, 1743 01:28:23,256 --> 01:28:25,842 and I fell in love and out of love... 1744 01:28:26,843 --> 01:28:27,844 many times. 1745 01:28:30,096 --> 01:28:31,263 Over here, my parents knew, 1746 01:28:31,264 --> 01:28:33,975 and they not only knew, but they... 1747 01:28:35,352 --> 01:28:36,603 loved me for it. 1748 01:28:39,648 --> 01:28:40,941 And over here, Tyler... 1749 01:28:43,860 --> 01:28:45,277 It's not that I think that he's right. 1750 01:28:45,278 --> 01:28:48,448 It's not that I think that he's the one. 1751 01:28:53,495 --> 01:28:55,788 [choking up] Just over here, I didn't waste so much time. 1752 01:28:55,789 --> 01:28:56,790 [chuckles softly] 1753 01:28:59,042 --> 01:29:00,502 I not only found love... 1754 01:29:02,045 --> 01:29:06,132 not only knew what love was, I knew what to do with it. 1755 01:29:10,345 --> 01:29:11,680 But to go over there... 1756 01:29:14,474 --> 01:29:15,851 to step through... 1757 01:29:20,522 --> 01:29:23,525 Diane, that's to know that none of that ever happened. 1758 01:29:25,694 --> 01:29:27,571 [sobbing] It's just me over there. 1759 01:29:29,990 --> 01:29:31,490 I'm not saying that for sympathy... 1760 01:29:31,491 --> 01:29:34,828 [sniffling] ...and I'm not saying that to excuse. 1761 01:29:35,996 --> 01:29:36,997 Uh... 1762 01:29:40,500 --> 01:29:42,544 I just don't know where to put it. [sobbing] 1763 01:29:46,548 --> 01:29:49,009 Jamie, your parents knew. 1764 01:29:50,218 --> 01:29:51,678 We always know. 1765 01:29:52,554 --> 01:29:54,514 And they knew who you were. 1766 01:29:55,515 --> 01:29:59,060 You were their son who loved them to the end. 1767 01:30:05,609 --> 01:30:07,694 - [sobbing] - [sighs] 1768 01:30:09,446 --> 01:30:12,449 [♪ gentle music playing] 1769 01:30:16,411 --> 01:30:18,120 [Diane sighs] 1770 01:30:18,121 --> 01:30:19,455 [phone chimes] 1771 01:30:19,456 --> 01:30:21,082 [Jamie exhales] 1772 01:30:25,545 --> 01:30:26,630 [Diane sighs] 1773 01:30:29,049 --> 01:30:30,424 "Checking in." 1774 01:30:30,425 --> 01:30:33,719 - [laughing] - Sooner than expected. 1775 01:30:33,720 --> 01:30:35,971 Well, his timing has always been terrible. 1776 01:30:35,972 --> 01:30:37,098 Or perfect. 1777 01:30:40,602 --> 01:30:41,728 Let him wait. 1778 01:30:42,938 --> 01:30:44,230 Until I'm ready. 1779 01:30:51,237 --> 01:30:52,781 You need to move on, Jamie. 1780 01:30:53,782 --> 01:30:56,075 - [stifled sobbing] - It's time. 1781 01:30:56,076 --> 01:30:57,077 Yes. 1782 01:31:00,747 --> 01:31:01,748 Yes. 1783 01:31:04,751 --> 01:31:06,919 [Jamie sighs deeply] 1784 01:31:06,920 --> 01:31:08,420 And take that succulent. 1785 01:31:08,421 --> 01:31:10,339 It deserves to be saved. [chuckles] 1786 01:31:10,340 --> 01:31:11,466 [chuckles softly] 1787 01:31:22,477 --> 01:31:25,105 [♪ "All of You" by Alex Bloom playing] 1788 01:31:31,695 --> 01:31:36,907 ♪ Threads of our memories ♪ 1789 01:31:36,908 --> 01:31:42,162 ♪ Woven to tapestries ♪ 1790 01:31:42,163 --> 01:31:47,292 ♪ That flow in the morning breeze ♪ 1791 01:31:47,293 --> 01:31:52,715 ♪ A sliver of light shone through ♪ 1792 01:31:52,716 --> 01:31:57,845 ♪ The window that frames our view ♪ 1793 01:31:57,846 --> 01:32:03,183 ♪ In my hands aglow the hue ♪ 1794 01:32:03,184 --> 01:32:10,149 ♪ A bittersweet reverie ♪ 1795 01:32:10,150 --> 01:32:16,488 ♪ All of you, I'll hold ♪ 1796 01:32:16,489 --> 01:32:20,325 ♪ Inside of me, we'll grow ♪ 1797 01:32:20,326 --> 01:32:27,166 ♪ Forever be free ♪ 1798 01:32:27,167 --> 01:32:32,171 ♪ A great mystery ♪ 1799 01:32:32,172 --> 01:32:36,342 ♪ Of reality ♪ 1800 01:32:44,392 --> 01:32:48,187 ♪ The sun has sung ♪ 1801 01:32:48,188 --> 01:32:53,859 ♪ Its glorious glowing song ♪ 1802 01:32:53,860 --> 01:32:58,947 ♪ Over that horizon ♪ 1803 01:32:58,948 --> 01:33:04,244 ♪ Deep in my soul, I know ♪ 1804 01:33:04,245 --> 01:33:09,750 ♪ Wherever I go, you go ♪ 1805 01:33:09,751 --> 01:33:16,298 ♪ All of the roads we roam lead home ♪ 1806 01:33:16,299 --> 01:33:22,930 ♪ All of you, I'll hold ♪ 1807 01:33:22,931 --> 01:33:26,600 ♪ Inside of me, we'll grow ♪ 1808 01:33:26,601 --> 01:33:33,440 ♪ Forever be free ♪ 1809 01:33:33,441 --> 01:33:38,070 ♪ A great mystery ♪ 1810 01:33:38,071 --> 01:33:42,951 ♪ Of reality ♪ 1811 01:33:50,166 --> 01:33:55,587 ♪ My deepest blue ocean ♪ 1812 01:33:55,588 --> 01:33:59,883 ♪ My world, my truth ♪ 1813 01:33:59,884 --> 01:34:05,139 ♪ Always the moon means you ♪ 1814 01:34:05,140 --> 01:34:10,519 ♪ The flower, the root, the tree ♪ 1815 01:34:10,520 --> 01:34:15,941 ♪ The frisson of swishing leaves ♪ 1816 01:34:15,942 --> 01:34:22,531 ♪ The stars and space between the wonder ♪ 1817 01:34:22,532 --> 01:34:29,288 ♪ All of you, I'll hold ♪ 1818 01:34:29,289 --> 01:34:32,708 ♪ Inside of me, we'll grow ♪ 1819 01:34:32,709 --> 01:34:39,548 ♪ Forever be free ♪ 1820 01:34:39,549 --> 01:34:44,511 ♪ A great mystery ♪ 1821 01:34:44,512 --> 01:34:48,683 ♪ Of reality ♪