1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:02,166 --> 00:00:06,833 [♪ Bournemouth Symphony Chorus: “Carmina Burana”] 3 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 4 00:00:26,083 --> 00:00:29,958 [music continues] 5 00:00:53,833 --> 00:00:55,000 [motorcycle revving] 6 00:00:55,125 --> 00:00:56,291 [woman screaming] 7 00:00:56,416 --> 00:00:57,625 [man screaming] 8 00:00:57,750 --> 00:00:59,625 [siren wailing] 9 00:00:59,750 --> 00:01:01,958 - Stop it! - [man] Dude, how sick is this? 10 00:01:02,083 --> 00:01:03,000 [laughs] 11 00:01:03,125 --> 00:01:04,125 [loud thud] 12 00:01:04,250 --> 00:01:06,333 [boy 1] We're gonna die! We're gonna die! 13 00:01:07,958 --> 00:01:09,333 [tires screeching] 14 00:01:09,458 --> 00:01:12,041 Oh, mama! 15 00:01:12,166 --> 00:01:15,583 [dramatic thud] 16 00:01:15,708 --> 00:01:18,208 [birds chirping] 17 00:01:18,333 --> 00:01:19,416 - [lacrosse ball thump] - [kids screaming] 18 00:01:19,541 --> 00:01:22,291 [upbeat music] 19 00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:23,625 [player] Pass the ball! 20 00:01:25,375 --> 00:01:26,250 [upbeat music continues] 21 00:01:27,625 --> 00:01:28,791 All right, guys, bring it in. 22 00:01:28,916 --> 00:01:29,791 All right, come on, come on, come on, 23 00:01:29,916 --> 00:01:31,125 Get in here. Huddle up. 24 00:01:31,250 --> 00:01:32,875 We got a minute left here, okay? We are tied up. 25 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:34,000 Lucas, whe--where are you? 26 00:01:34,125 --> 00:01:35,416 - Lucas, where are you? - I'm right here, Dad. 27 00:01:35,541 --> 00:01:36,708 - Go, Lucas! - Get in here. 28 00:01:36,833 --> 00:01:37,666 - You're on the team. Let's go. - [audience] Come on. 29 00:01:37,791 --> 00:01:39,041 You're kidding. He sucks. 30 00:01:39,166 --> 00:01:40,625 Nobody covered him in the second quarter. 31 00:01:40,750 --> 00:01:42,333 I'm getting triple teamed out there. 32 00:01:42,458 --> 00:01:44,375 Well, you know what? Then I'll tell you what. Um-- 33 00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:46,083 [kid 1] Dude, have you even played lacrosse? 34 00:01:46,208 --> 00:01:47,416 [kid 2] Just cold play, loser. 35 00:01:47,541 --> 00:01:49,416 Okay, fine. You know what-- that's a play. 36 00:01:49,541 --> 00:01:50,583 We're gonna get the ball to Lucas. 37 00:01:50,708 --> 00:01:52,500 - [kid] What, are you high? - Yes, that's the plan. 38 00:01:52,625 --> 00:01:53,541 Lucas, you're gonna take the shot. 39 00:01:53,666 --> 00:01:54,666 We're gonna win this thing, okay? 40 00:01:54,791 --> 00:01:55,875 Let's get in there. What do you say? 41 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:57,041 - [kid] I say we're gonna lose. - I don't care. 42 00:01:57,166 --> 00:01:58,583 Let's win this thing as a team, guys. 43 00:01:58,708 --> 00:01:59,875 - This is bullshit. - Let's go, guys. 44 00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:01,458 Let's go. We are heroes. 45 00:02:01,583 --> 00:02:03,083 Dad, are you sure about this? 46 00:02:03,208 --> 00:02:05,083 I mean, everyone's just gonna be pissed off at me 47 00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:06,166 if I mess this up. 48 00:02:06,291 --> 00:02:07,416 Maybe I should just go sit on the bench. 49 00:02:07,541 --> 00:02:09,125 Sit on the bench? 50 00:02:09,250 --> 00:02:11,208 Buddy, you are set up for the hero moment. 51 00:02:11,333 --> 00:02:12,750 When we watch those sports movies, 52 00:02:12,875 --> 00:02:15,208 and it comes down to those final few seconds, 53 00:02:15,333 --> 00:02:17,250 and everything turns to slow motion, 54 00:02:17,375 --> 00:02:19,291 that's where the hero emerges. 55 00:02:19,416 --> 00:02:21,208 - [slow motion] Whoa! - [giggles] 56 00:02:21,333 --> 00:02:23,541 Everything slows down, and they make the shot, 57 00:02:23,666 --> 00:02:24,958 and it's victory! 58 00:02:25,083 --> 00:02:26,250 And they throw 'em on their shoulders, 59 00:02:26,375 --> 00:02:27,375 and they're going crazy. 60 00:02:27,500 --> 00:02:28,958 The girls are gonna be “Lucas, Lucas!” 61 00:02:29,083 --> 00:02:30,041 - [chuckles] - That's how we win. 62 00:02:30,166 --> 00:02:31,125 - All right. - All right? 63 00:02:31,250 --> 00:02:32,166 - Let's do it. - Let's make it happen. 64 00:02:33,708 --> 00:02:34,625 I love you, Dad. 65 00:02:34,750 --> 00:02:36,083 Okay, sshh. Hey, maybe lower. 66 00:02:36,208 --> 00:02:37,083 This, this is sports. We don't-- 67 00:02:37,208 --> 00:02:39,333 we kind of-- it's already assumed. 68 00:02:39,458 --> 00:02:41,125 It's assumed. 69 00:02:41,250 --> 00:02:42,416 [whistle blows] 70 00:02:42,541 --> 00:02:43,833 Lucas! 71 00:02:43,958 --> 00:02:45,583 [upbeat, suspenseful music] 72 00:02:45,708 --> 00:02:47,041 All right, please, yes. 73 00:02:48,166 --> 00:02:49,208 Oh, please. 74 00:02:49,333 --> 00:02:51,250 Please, God. Please. 75 00:02:52,416 --> 00:02:53,250 - [ball plops] - Yes! 76 00:02:53,375 --> 00:02:54,208 [shrieks] Oh, my God! 77 00:02:54,333 --> 00:02:55,583 Lucas, go! 78 00:02:55,708 --> 00:02:57,583 - [excited screaming] - [kid] Eye of the tiger! 79 00:02:59,166 --> 00:03:00,333 What the hell is he doing? 80 00:03:01,875 --> 00:03:03,625 Why is he moving in slow motion? 81 00:03:03,750 --> 00:03:04,708 I might have told him to. 82 00:03:04,833 --> 00:03:05,666 [players screaming] 83 00:03:05,791 --> 00:03:07,208 [groans] 84 00:03:09,083 --> 00:03:11,416 No! He had no right! 85 00:03:11,541 --> 00:03:13,125 - No way! - [kid] You suck, Lucas. 86 00:03:13,250 --> 00:03:14,708 [Brian] You're okay. He's okay. 87 00:03:14,833 --> 00:03:16,291 You just got the wind knocked out of ya. 88 00:03:16,416 --> 00:03:17,416 He got the wind knocked out of him. 89 00:03:17,541 --> 00:03:19,083 He's fine. Gonna come back quick. 90 00:03:19,208 --> 00:03:21,208 [weakly] Help me. [coughs] 91 00:03:22,750 --> 00:03:25,041 Maybe lacrosse isn't his thing? 92 00:03:25,166 --> 00:03:27,541 I mean, maybe he's just not a sports kind of kid at all. 93 00:03:27,666 --> 00:03:28,833 [ping sound] 94 00:03:28,958 --> 00:03:31,416 {\an8}♪ Four leaf clover won't you come over ♪ 95 00:03:31,541 --> 00:03:34,458 {\an8}♪ Baby, give me a chance ♪ 96 00:03:34,583 --> 00:03:36,333 {\an8}Look, playing a sport is important to him. 97 00:03:36,458 --> 00:03:37,625 I mean, this is all I know. 98 00:03:37,750 --> 00:03:39,000 This is what I did. 99 00:03:39,125 --> 00:03:41,625 I--I connected with my father through sports. 100 00:03:41,750 --> 00:03:45,041 Oh, honey, I know this whole new stepdad thing can't be easy 101 00:03:45,166 --> 00:03:46,916 and I love that you're trying so hard to connect with him. 102 00:03:47,041 --> 00:03:48,375 I really, I really am. 103 00:03:48,500 --> 00:03:49,958 You and Lucas will find your thing too, 104 00:03:50,083 --> 00:03:51,875 but you just gotta give it time. 105 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:53,583 You can't force it. 106 00:03:53,708 --> 00:03:55,208 Come here. I love you. 107 00:03:55,333 --> 00:03:56,166 I love you. 108 00:03:57,708 --> 00:03:59,458 Yo, Hunt. We'll get ‘em next time, huh, bro? 109 00:03:59,583 --> 00:04:00,666 Don't call me “bro,” dude. 110 00:04:00,791 --> 00:04:01,750 Don't call me “dude,” son. 111 00:04:01,875 --> 00:04:02,833 Don't call me “son,” bitch. 112 00:04:02,958 --> 00:04:04,958 - I'm not a bitch, you're a-- - Oh my God, stop. 113 00:04:09,125 --> 00:04:10,125 You okay? 114 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:11,833 Yeah, fine, it's just... 115 00:04:11,958 --> 00:04:13,500 By the way, how long does it take Lucas to take a leak? 116 00:04:13,625 --> 00:04:14,541 Oh, can you check on him for me? 117 00:04:14,666 --> 00:04:16,583 He gets bladder shy. 118 00:04:16,708 --> 00:04:18,000 Yeah. 119 00:04:18,125 --> 00:04:19,416 - [mean kids laughing] - [door closes] 120 00:04:19,541 --> 00:04:21,041 Oh, shit. It's Pukas. 121 00:04:21,166 --> 00:04:22,750 What's up, Pukas? 122 00:04:22,875 --> 00:04:25,583 [Lucas] Look, I'm sorry if I did anything to piss you guys off. 123 00:04:25,708 --> 00:04:28,333 Honestly, I--I just want it to be cool between us. 124 00:04:28,458 --> 00:04:29,583 [Kurt] Oh, shit. 125 00:04:29,708 --> 00:04:31,458 Hey! Don't touch him. 126 00:04:31,583 --> 00:04:32,625 [Kurt] Daddy's here. 127 00:04:33,958 --> 00:04:35,958 Let's go, Lucas. 128 00:04:36,083 --> 00:04:37,125 Let me tell you something. 129 00:04:37,250 --> 00:04:38,375 You touch him again, I come back here, 130 00:04:38,500 --> 00:04:39,958 I personally kick every one of your asses. 131 00:04:40,083 --> 00:04:41,208 Every one, every ass. 132 00:04:41,333 --> 00:04:42,666 I kick it, you understand? 133 00:04:42,791 --> 00:04:45,083 Just let's go, Lucas. Come on. 134 00:04:45,208 --> 00:04:47,458 Do you understand what you guys almost got into? 135 00:04:47,583 --> 00:04:49,250 Do you have any idea the annihilation 136 00:04:49,375 --> 00:04:50,291 that would have taken place here? 137 00:04:50,416 --> 00:04:51,500 Annihilation. Wait, you want to go? 138 00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:52,958 You feeling frisky? You want to go? 139 00:04:53,083 --> 00:04:54,750 You know what? I'll go. 140 00:04:54,875 --> 00:04:55,791 - Hm? - You want to go? 141 00:04:55,916 --> 00:04:56,833 - Let's go. - How old are you? 142 00:04:56,958 --> 00:04:57,875 What the hell where'd you come from? 143 00:04:58,000 --> 00:04:59,000 - Let's go. - I don't-- 144 00:04:59,125 --> 00:05:00,000 I'm not saying I don't want to go. 145 00:05:00,125 --> 00:05:01,375 I'm just saying we can go. 146 00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:03,458 Stop talking shit and just do it, old man. 147 00:05:03,583 --> 00:05:04,875 - Hit me. - Bring the voice down. 148 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:06,166 Okay, we're in a locker room. It's a lot of acoustics. 149 00:05:06,291 --> 00:05:07,458 You just said you could kick all our asses. 150 00:05:07,583 --> 00:05:08,833 I know. I haven't even eaten yet. 151 00:05:08,958 --> 00:05:10,375 We have reservations at Benihana. 152 00:05:10,500 --> 00:05:12,166 You know where they do the smoking volcano thing 153 00:05:12,291 --> 00:05:13,250 with the runyons. 154 00:05:13,375 --> 00:05:15,041 It's fine. Let's go, Lucas man. 155 00:05:15,166 --> 00:05:17,083 Go. Just... better watch it next time. 156 00:05:17,208 --> 00:05:18,750 Yeah. 157 00:05:19,958 --> 00:05:20,916 All right. 158 00:05:21,041 --> 00:05:21,916 What's that kid's name anyway? 159 00:05:22,041 --> 00:05:23,333 - Kurt. - Kurt. 160 00:05:23,458 --> 00:05:24,500 Freaking Kurt. 161 00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:26,166 Do you realize how... how--how 162 00:05:26,291 --> 00:05:27,583 - that would have went down? - Oh, yeah. 163 00:05:27,708 --> 00:05:28,541 I would have kicked all their asses. 164 00:05:28,666 --> 00:05:30,041 - Yeah, definitely. - Yeah. 165 00:05:30,166 --> 00:05:31,625 Now, I should go back there. I'm gonna go back there. 166 00:05:31,750 --> 00:05:33,375 - No, no, no, no. - He's probably not there, right? 167 00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:34,791 - I mean, I'm gonna-- - It's fine, Dad. 168 00:05:34,916 --> 00:05:36,250 I should just close this shit out, man. 169 00:05:36,375 --> 00:05:37,625 - This is crazy. - No, no, no, no. 170 00:05:37,750 --> 00:05:38,791 It's--it's fine, Dad. 171 00:05:38,916 --> 00:05:41,083 I'm used to it. 172 00:05:41,208 --> 00:05:42,250 What do you mean you're used to it? 173 00:05:42,375 --> 00:05:43,666 That's not... 174 00:05:43,791 --> 00:05:45,333 see, that's not something you should be used to. 175 00:05:45,458 --> 00:05:46,750 How often does this happen? 176 00:05:46,875 --> 00:05:49,041 Uh, every day. 177 00:05:51,375 --> 00:05:53,250 [Brian] I mean, there's no way for him to escape. 178 00:05:53,375 --> 00:05:54,750 Did you know it was this bad? 179 00:05:54,875 --> 00:05:57,000 No. What should we do? 180 00:05:57,125 --> 00:05:58,583 Nothing now, because I slammed it down. 181 00:05:58,708 --> 00:06:00,458 I shut it, you know? I took care of things. 182 00:06:00,583 --> 00:06:02,125 I nipped it in the bud, you know? So-- 183 00:06:02,250 --> 00:06:04,166 You got to call the school and the principal right away. 184 00:06:04,291 --> 00:06:05,333 What? No. You can't do that. 185 00:06:05,458 --> 00:06:06,583 Then he's a rat. 186 00:06:06,708 --> 00:06:08,333 You saw The Departed. He'll get whacked. 187 00:06:08,458 --> 00:06:12,000 Brian, you're his dad now. 188 00:06:12,125 --> 00:06:14,083 This is something a dad needs to handle. 189 00:06:15,958 --> 00:06:16,791 You're right. You're right. 190 00:06:16,916 --> 00:06:19,875 I...Hey, look at me. 191 00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:21,916 I promise you I'll never let anything bad happen to him. 192 00:06:22,041 --> 00:06:23,666 All right? 193 00:06:23,791 --> 00:06:25,500 - All right. - I gotta get back to work. 194 00:06:25,625 --> 00:06:27,791 When I get back, we'll take care of this, all right? 195 00:06:27,916 --> 00:06:30,708 Hey, no more bullies. 196 00:06:30,833 --> 00:06:32,125 [man] Kick his ass! 197 00:06:32,250 --> 00:06:33,625 - Please get off! - Oh, oh! 198 00:06:33,750 --> 00:06:35,000 Get him, you little bitch! 199 00:06:35,125 --> 00:06:36,708 [frat exec 2] Dude, I got five grand on you! 200 00:06:36,833 --> 00:06:37,875 - [knock on door] - [frat exec 2] Go, go! 201 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:39,500 C--Claire said you wanted to see me? 202 00:06:39,625 --> 00:06:40,916 Hey, buddy. 203 00:06:41,041 --> 00:06:42,333 Yeah, come on in. 204 00:06:42,458 --> 00:06:44,291 Just, uh, just grab-- grab a seat. 205 00:06:44,416 --> 00:06:45,375 - [frat exec 1] Go! Go! - [frat exec 2] You can do it! 206 00:06:45,500 --> 00:06:46,458 Believe in yourself! 207 00:06:46,583 --> 00:06:49,125 [both] Yeah! Whoo! 208 00:06:49,250 --> 00:06:50,708 [frat exec 1] Pay up, [indistinct]. 209 00:06:50,833 --> 00:06:51,708 - [ball thwack] - [groans] 210 00:06:51,833 --> 00:06:53,125 [boss] Hey, so listen. 211 00:06:53,250 --> 00:06:54,833 The Pfizer thing. 212 00:06:54,958 --> 00:06:56,416 You're gonna straighten out those numbers, right? 213 00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:58,416 Well, I mean, the numbers are what the numbers are. 214 00:06:58,541 --> 00:06:59,625 First of all, don't yell at me. 215 00:06:59,750 --> 00:07:01,083 Okay, then. I didn't think I was yelling. 216 00:07:01,208 --> 00:07:03,125 Sounded like yelling. 217 00:07:03,250 --> 00:07:04,541 Numbers are a little tight, dawg, 218 00:07:04,666 --> 00:07:06,166 so just make them a little loosey-goosey, you know? 219 00:07:06,291 --> 00:07:07,333 Well, I mean, if we loosen them up-- 220 00:07:07,458 --> 00:07:09,208 Hey, calm down. 221 00:07:09,333 --> 00:07:10,625 If we loosen them up, 222 00:07:10,750 --> 00:07:14,416 then what you're gonna do is you're basically, 223 00:07:14,541 --> 00:07:15,833 you're asking me to commit fraud. 224 00:07:15,958 --> 00:07:16,791 - What?! - [all gasping] 225 00:07:16,916 --> 00:07:18,208 Whoa. 226 00:07:18,333 --> 00:07:21,125 Listen, Dad is gonna flip out if he sees these numbers. 227 00:07:21,250 --> 00:07:22,583 Bro, you can't let Dad flip out. 228 00:07:22,708 --> 00:07:24,333 You can't let Dad flip out. 229 00:07:24,458 --> 00:07:26,458 I mean, he's not-- he's not my dad. 230 00:07:26,583 --> 00:07:28,083 - What?! - [female exec] How dare you! 231 00:07:28,208 --> 00:07:29,291 [frat exec 1] You shut your face! 232 00:07:29,416 --> 00:07:30,416 Let me ask you something. 233 00:07:31,625 --> 00:07:32,958 How do you think this is going? 234 00:07:33,083 --> 00:07:33,916 Well, I thought it was going better when I first-- 235 00:07:34,041 --> 00:07:35,958 That's not a question. 236 00:07:36,083 --> 00:07:37,833 But here's the answer: [shouts] You're fired! 237 00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:39,458 - [glass shatters] - My dad always hated you. 238 00:07:39,583 --> 00:07:40,750 - Okay. - [dog barking] 239 00:07:40,875 --> 00:07:42,708 [♪ Ms. Money: “Big Bootys Winning”] 240 00:07:42,833 --> 00:07:43,791 ♪ Big booty bitches ♪ 241 00:07:43,916 --> 00:07:45,041 ♪ You're winning you're winning ♪ 242 00:07:45,166 --> 00:07:46,375 - ♪ Drop it down low ♪ - [Brian clears throat] 243 00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:48,708 - ♪ Yeah, spinnin' spinnin' ♪ - [Lucas grunts] 244 00:07:48,833 --> 00:07:50,458 [Lucas] Shake it, girl. 245 00:07:50,583 --> 00:07:51,875 ♪ So you can't get low, low, low ♪ 246 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:53,000 [moaning] 247 00:07:53,125 --> 00:07:54,500 ♪ Big booty bitches ♪ 248 00:07:54,625 --> 00:07:56,208 ♪ You're winning you're winning ♪ 249 00:07:56,333 --> 00:07:59,541 So they called you a baby back bitch? 250 00:07:59,666 --> 00:08:01,208 Do they do that a lot? 251 00:08:01,333 --> 00:08:03,166 No, it doesn't matter. Whatever it is. 252 00:08:03,291 --> 00:08:05,500 I had to lay down the law is what I did. 253 00:08:05,625 --> 00:08:06,666 But, you know, there's the standards. 254 00:08:06,791 --> 00:08:08,458 There's standards. I'm just cut from the cloth 255 00:08:08,583 --> 00:08:10,125 of a higher standard, if that makes any sense. 256 00:08:10,250 --> 00:08:11,500 I don't know if it does, 257 00:08:11,625 --> 00:08:13,458 but that's--you--you get what I'm saying, right? 258 00:08:13,583 --> 00:08:14,750 No, you're right. 259 00:08:14,875 --> 00:08:17,083 Yeah. You're right. 260 00:08:18,208 --> 00:08:19,291 What? 261 00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:21,416 You're such a badass. 262 00:08:21,541 --> 00:08:23,583 You're not a baby back bitch. 263 00:08:23,708 --> 00:08:25,041 We'll just have to cut back on a few things 264 00:08:25,166 --> 00:08:28,708 until you find something else. [sighs] 265 00:08:28,833 --> 00:08:30,750 Maybe we pump the brakes on his dance lessons, huh? 266 00:08:30,875 --> 00:08:31,916 [Lucas grunts] 267 00:08:32,041 --> 00:08:33,250 Mm-hm. Mm, mm. 268 00:08:33,375 --> 00:08:35,291 We're paying for that? 269 00:08:35,416 --> 00:08:36,666 A lot. 270 00:08:36,791 --> 00:08:38,291 You know, I still have that open invitation 271 00:08:38,416 --> 00:08:39,750 to rejoin my old firm. 272 00:08:39,875 --> 00:08:41,291 I thought you wanted to stay home with Lucas. 273 00:08:41,416 --> 00:08:43,541 I do, but we also need an income, right? 274 00:08:43,666 --> 00:08:45,500 So maybe you tag in 275 00:08:45,625 --> 00:08:47,333 and do the whole stay-at-home dad thing 276 00:08:47,458 --> 00:08:49,000 for a bit. 277 00:08:49,125 --> 00:08:51,583 You want me to stay at home with--with him all day, 278 00:08:51,708 --> 00:08:52,625 just me and him? 279 00:08:52,750 --> 00:08:53,833 It would just be temporary. 280 00:08:53,958 --> 00:08:55,500 Plus, it'd be so good for you and Lucas. 281 00:08:55,625 --> 00:08:57,416 It would give you all this one-on-one time 282 00:08:57,541 --> 00:08:59,791 to just like bond. 283 00:08:59,916 --> 00:09:01,333 ♪ So you can't get low no more ♪ 284 00:09:01,458 --> 00:09:03,791 Ugh! [panting] 285 00:09:03,875 --> 00:09:04,708 Was that good? 286 00:09:04,791 --> 00:09:05,625 [clapping] 287 00:09:05,791 --> 00:09:07,791 Very good, sweetie. It was very good. 288 00:09:07,916 --> 00:09:09,541 There's really no way to tell, pal. 289 00:09:09,666 --> 00:09:11,000 [bell rings] 290 00:09:11,125 --> 00:09:14,541 ♪ I love vacation, and I'm all numb--♪ 291 00:09:15,875 --> 00:09:16,708 [chopsticks clank] 292 00:09:16,833 --> 00:09:18,166 Hey, bud. 293 00:09:18,291 --> 00:09:19,791 Aren't you, uh, supposed to be in school? 294 00:09:19,916 --> 00:09:21,416 No, it's teacher in service day. 295 00:09:21,541 --> 00:09:22,500 The hell is that? 296 00:09:22,625 --> 00:09:24,416 It's when teachers learn new techniques 297 00:09:24,541 --> 00:09:25,750 to help them with their teaching. 298 00:09:25,875 --> 00:09:26,958 And you get a day off for that? 299 00:09:27,083 --> 00:09:28,250 Why don't they work that out on their, 300 00:09:28,375 --> 00:09:29,416 like, their own time? 301 00:09:29,541 --> 00:09:31,583 Well, I don't know, but it's good for us. 302 00:09:31,708 --> 00:09:34,500 So what are we gonna do today? 303 00:09:34,625 --> 00:09:35,958 We? 304 00:09:36,083 --> 00:09:37,708 Boom. There you are. A puzzle. 305 00:09:37,833 --> 00:09:38,875 Look at that. Huh? 306 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:41,208 It's 25,000 pieces. 307 00:09:41,333 --> 00:09:42,208 Yeah, it is. 308 00:09:42,333 --> 00:09:43,833 That's weeks' worth. 309 00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:45,625 Maybe even a month. Who knows? 310 00:09:45,750 --> 00:09:48,166 - I'm kind of hungry, actually. - Oh. 311 00:09:48,291 --> 00:09:49,166 Am I supposed to cook you something, 312 00:09:49,291 --> 00:09:50,416 - or-- - Sure 313 00:09:50,541 --> 00:09:51,416 Is that what your mother would do? 314 00:09:51,541 --> 00:09:52,833 - Mm-hmm. - All right. Uh, yeah. 315 00:09:52,958 --> 00:09:54,750 Let's, uh, let's get after it. 316 00:09:54,875 --> 00:09:56,291 You ever try intermittent fasting, by the way? 317 00:09:56,416 --> 00:09:58,166 - Intermittent fasting? - Fasting, yeah. 318 00:09:58,291 --> 00:09:59,500 It's amazing for your colon. 319 00:09:59,625 --> 00:10:00,833 I'm in with you. Let's both do it. 320 00:10:00,958 --> 00:10:01,875 What do you say? 321 00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:03,708 Okay, well... I'm sorry. 322 00:10:03,833 --> 00:10:04,666 I'm just really hungry. 323 00:10:04,791 --> 00:10:05,666 - Okay. - Sorry. 324 00:10:05,791 --> 00:10:06,958 All right, uh... 325 00:10:07,083 --> 00:10:08,958 Sometimes Mom makes me breakfast sandwiches 326 00:10:09,083 --> 00:10:10,541 with the King's Hawaiian rolls. 327 00:10:10,666 --> 00:10:11,750 Oh, these are cool. 328 00:10:11,875 --> 00:10:12,958 These are really good. I like them. 329 00:10:13,083 --> 00:10:14,208 - Yeah. - Yeah. 330 00:10:14,333 --> 00:10:15,291 All right, so you know what to do with that, 331 00:10:15,416 --> 00:10:16,500 and that's--that's amazing. 332 00:10:16,625 --> 00:10:17,625 - That's really cool. - Yeah, I think so. 333 00:10:17,750 --> 00:10:18,750 - All right. - Great. 334 00:10:18,875 --> 00:10:19,958 - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah, sure. 335 00:10:20,083 --> 00:10:20,916 You want to make them with me or...? 336 00:10:21,041 --> 00:10:22,625 No, you're good. 337 00:10:22,750 --> 00:10:23,833 [distant chatter] 338 00:10:23,958 --> 00:10:24,958 All right. 339 00:10:25,083 --> 00:10:26,875 You wanna throw the football around? 340 00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:27,875 Do a little boxing? 341 00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:28,875 - Nah. - We could do, uh-- 342 00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:30,416 How about this? 343 00:10:31,541 --> 00:10:33,541 [humming] 344 00:10:33,666 --> 00:10:34,875 Or just do weird crap on your own, 345 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:35,875 that's fine too. 346 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,916 [alarm beeping] 347 00:10:38,041 --> 00:10:38,916 ♪ What up, bitch? ♪ 348 00:10:39,041 --> 00:10:40,375 [woman laughing] 349 00:10:40,500 --> 00:10:41,625 But you do owe me 50 bucks, 350 00:10:41,750 --> 00:10:43,041 I'm not fooling around on that. 351 00:10:43,166 --> 00:10:44,000 [woman 2] I'll give you 50 bucks. 352 00:10:44,125 --> 00:10:45,208 - Relax. - [woman 1] You relax. 353 00:10:45,333 --> 00:10:46,958 I want my fucking money. 354 00:10:47,083 --> 00:10:49,041 This dude looks like my AA sponsor. 355 00:10:49,166 --> 00:10:51,291 [woman] Dude looks like my garbage man. 356 00:10:51,416 --> 00:10:54,375 ♪ That gold crown ain't really really relaxin' ♪ 357 00:10:54,500 --> 00:10:57,083 ♪ All twenty-six packs on taxes ♪ 358 00:11:00,875 --> 00:11:01,833 Who are you? 359 00:11:01,958 --> 00:11:03,208 I'm Brian. 360 00:11:03,333 --> 00:11:05,166 Do you party, Brian? 361 00:11:05,291 --> 00:11:06,416 Do I party? 362 00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:07,625 Mm-hmm. 363 00:11:07,750 --> 00:11:10,708 I mean, in college, I did, I guess. 364 00:11:10,833 --> 00:11:11,750 I'm Leslie. 365 00:11:11,875 --> 00:11:13,291 This is Ivy, Jess and Marla. 366 00:11:13,416 --> 00:11:14,791 We got the Mama Mafia here. 367 00:11:14,916 --> 00:11:15,958 - What's up? - What's up? 368 00:11:16,083 --> 00:11:19,291 Hello. Nice to meet you, uh... Mama Mafia. 369 00:11:19,416 --> 00:11:21,666 Did you take my parking spot, Brian? 370 00:11:21,791 --> 00:11:23,000 Oh, is that yours? 371 00:11:23,125 --> 00:11:24,625 All the gray Honda Odysseys? 372 00:11:24,750 --> 00:11:25,625 All of them, are they all yours? 373 00:11:25,750 --> 00:11:27,333 - Yeah. - Safest SUV on the market 374 00:11:27,458 --> 00:11:28,583 and gray's least likely to get stolen. 375 00:11:28,708 --> 00:11:29,833 Is there a problem? 376 00:11:29,958 --> 00:11:31,125 No, no, no, I didn't know. 377 00:11:31,250 --> 00:11:32,875 And it was just felt like crazy to me, 378 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,666 but crazy sensible. 379 00:11:34,791 --> 00:11:36,916 Like you got the exact same color and everything. 380 00:11:37,041 --> 00:11:38,500 It's pretty cool. 381 00:11:38,625 --> 00:11:41,791 - Snack bag? - Oh, thank you very much. 382 00:11:41,916 --> 00:11:43,416 - I appreciate that. - Those are for the kids. 383 00:11:43,541 --> 00:11:44,625 Yeah, I know they are. 384 00:11:44,750 --> 00:11:46,541 Give it back, Brian. 385 00:11:46,666 --> 00:11:48,666 Back, Brian. 386 00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:50,416 You've had enough frickin' snacks. 387 00:11:50,541 --> 00:11:51,625 So you want to be in? 388 00:11:51,750 --> 00:11:53,041 You want to join the mafia? 389 00:11:53,166 --> 00:11:54,416 Do I want to join the Mama Mafia? 390 00:11:54,541 --> 00:11:55,458 - Yeah. - No. 391 00:11:55,583 --> 00:11:56,833 I don't--I don't even know, 392 00:11:56,958 --> 00:11:59,041 you know, what the Mama Mafia really is about. 393 00:11:59,166 --> 00:12:00,791 It's easy. Weekdays, we're here at 10 AM, 394 00:12:00,916 --> 00:12:02,125 we drop the kids, they go apeshit. 395 00:12:02,250 --> 00:12:04,416 Yeah, at 12, we caravan down to Chili's, eat lunch, 396 00:12:04,541 --> 00:12:05,833 and get ripped up. 397 00:12:05,958 --> 00:12:07,666 But mainly to get ripped up! 398 00:12:09,875 --> 00:12:11,208 Yeah, you want some wine? 399 00:12:11,333 --> 00:12:14,083 I...I don't drink so much during the day, you know? 400 00:12:14,208 --> 00:12:16,583 You want coke? Ivy's got speed. 401 00:12:16,708 --> 00:12:21,166 No, not now, 'cause I'm watching my, uh, son. Um-- 402 00:12:21,291 --> 00:12:22,625 You're gonna have to lose the windbreaker, though. 403 00:12:22,750 --> 00:12:24,083 - Oh. - You want to get jumped in? 404 00:12:24,208 --> 00:12:25,250 - Jumped in? - Yeah. 405 00:12:25,375 --> 00:12:26,458 You can keep your clothes on. 406 00:12:26,583 --> 00:12:29,125 Uh, not right away. You know what it is? 407 00:12:29,250 --> 00:12:30,625 Oh, that's Lucas. 408 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,125 - Okay, that's my boy. - [phone beeping] 409 00:12:32,250 --> 00:12:34,208 He's a wanderer and my wife got him 410 00:12:34,333 --> 00:12:36,208 this wearable GPS tracker. 411 00:12:36,333 --> 00:12:38,541 - Did your wife pick your jacket? - She might have. 412 00:12:38,666 --> 00:12:39,625 I'll see you later. 413 00:12:39,750 --> 00:12:40,916 - Uh-- - No, you won't, Brian. 414 00:12:41,041 --> 00:12:41,875 - [Brian] Okay . - You freaking won't. 415 00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,875 [Brian] I hope not. All right, Lucas, 416 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,083 let's just try to throw a spiral, 417 00:12:45,208 --> 00:12:46,125 - you know what I'm saying? - Okay. 418 00:12:46,250 --> 00:12:47,833 Spiral. You want to position your hand 419 00:12:47,958 --> 00:12:49,166 on the back quarter of the ball. 420 00:12:49,291 --> 00:12:50,500 Here you go. It's just a nice, tight spiral. 421 00:12:50,625 --> 00:12:51,666 Nice and tight. 422 00:12:51,791 --> 00:12:53,333 Okay. All right. Can you pick that one up? 423 00:12:53,458 --> 00:12:54,708 - [Lucas] Love you, Dad. - Yeah, no worries. 424 00:12:54,833 --> 00:12:56,041 Try to catch those, okay? 425 00:12:56,166 --> 00:12:57,125 Makes it so much more fun. 426 00:12:57,250 --> 00:12:58,208 - [strains] - That wasn't it. 427 00:12:58,333 --> 00:12:59,291 - I'm sorry. - Okay. 428 00:12:59,416 --> 00:13:01,250 [Lucas] Sorry. My bad. 429 00:13:01,375 --> 00:13:03,000 This is gonna suck. 430 00:13:03,125 --> 00:13:04,041 Thread that needle, I see it. 431 00:13:04,166 --> 00:13:05,166 Was that good? 432 00:13:05,291 --> 00:13:06,541 That's more-- that wasn't threaded, 433 00:13:06,666 --> 00:13:07,708 that was more crochet. 434 00:13:07,833 --> 00:13:09,916 All right. 435 00:13:10,041 --> 00:13:11,666 [kid screams] 436 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:12,708 [man strains] 437 00:13:14,375 --> 00:13:15,291 [kid strains] 438 00:13:16,958 --> 00:13:18,041 [man strains] 439 00:13:18,166 --> 00:13:20,541 [distant chatter] 440 00:13:20,666 --> 00:13:21,875 All right, Lucas, let's turn it up a notch. 441 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:23,000 What do you say, okay? 442 00:13:23,125 --> 00:13:24,000 - See what I'm doin'? - [groans] 443 00:13:24,125 --> 00:13:25,583 Okay, you try to catch those though. 444 00:13:25,708 --> 00:13:26,625 That's what you got to do. You take it right in the chest. 445 00:13:26,750 --> 00:13:27,958 Hey, give you a little tip. 446 00:13:28,083 --> 00:13:30,000 It's these fingers for a spiral. 447 00:13:30,125 --> 00:13:31,125 Yeah, I know how to throw a spiral. 448 00:13:31,250 --> 00:13:32,458 It's probably because you got tiny hands. 449 00:13:32,583 --> 00:13:33,875 It can be tricky with little mitts like that. 450 00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:35,500 You just got to adjust your grip like this. 451 00:13:35,625 --> 00:13:36,666 You don't, well-- I mean a little bit, yeah. 452 00:13:36,791 --> 00:13:37,750 Hey, what do you say we play a game? 453 00:13:37,875 --> 00:13:38,875 Nah, I'm good. I'm just... 454 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:39,958 You thinking like a little two-on-two? 455 00:13:40,083 --> 00:13:41,041 No, I'm not thinking that at all. 456 00:13:41,166 --> 00:13:43,041 Okay, fun. CJ, go cover his kid! Here. 457 00:13:43,166 --> 00:13:44,916 - I didn't even-- - Hike it. Hike the ball. 458 00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:45,958 I don't even know what we're doing. 459 00:13:46,083 --> 00:13:47,416 Hey, stay tight on him. Stay tight. 460 00:13:47,541 --> 00:13:48,500 [overlapping chatter] 461 00:13:48,625 --> 00:13:50,041 - That's all we're doing. - Hike it, dude. 462 00:13:50,166 --> 00:13:51,250 [overlapping chatter] 463 00:13:51,375 --> 00:13:52,500 - I don't even know the rules. - Ready? Ready? 464 00:13:52,625 --> 00:13:53,666 Can you just listen? Oh my God! 465 00:13:53,791 --> 00:13:54,666 [ping sound] 466 00:13:54,791 --> 00:13:56,333 [screaming] 467 00:13:56,458 --> 00:13:59,125 [groaning] 468 00:13:59,250 --> 00:14:01,458 Oh look, they're friends already. 469 00:14:01,583 --> 00:14:04,583 Shake it, girl, come and get it. 470 00:14:04,708 --> 00:14:06,625 Do you mind, uh, getting off me? 471 00:14:06,750 --> 00:14:11,083 [panting] 472 00:14:11,208 --> 00:14:13,208 Fatherhood, huh? 473 00:14:13,333 --> 00:14:14,375 Come on. 474 00:14:14,500 --> 00:14:15,750 Okay. 475 00:14:15,875 --> 00:14:16,833 [both strains] 476 00:14:16,958 --> 00:14:18,375 Okay. 477 00:14:18,500 --> 00:14:20,958 Oh, look, your kid's catching a bug with my little bugger. 478 00:14:21,083 --> 00:14:22,958 Oh, that should keep them busy for a while. 479 00:14:24,208 --> 00:14:25,333 I stand corrected. 480 00:14:25,458 --> 00:14:28,041 CJ, let it go! 481 00:14:28,166 --> 00:14:31,208 No! Drop it! 482 00:14:31,333 --> 00:14:33,208 [crunches] 483 00:14:33,333 --> 00:14:34,583 Hmm. 484 00:14:34,708 --> 00:14:36,500 Dude's always putting stuff in his mouth. 485 00:14:36,625 --> 00:14:38,541 Your kid ever go through that phase? 486 00:14:38,666 --> 00:14:40,375 Maybe when he was one. 487 00:14:40,500 --> 00:14:42,541 Yeah, we're taking a little longer. 488 00:14:42,666 --> 00:14:44,333 Name's Jeff. 489 00:14:44,458 --> 00:14:46,041 Uh, Brian. 490 00:14:46,166 --> 00:14:48,375 Outstanding. 491 00:14:48,500 --> 00:14:49,583 You ever go by “Bri-Bri”? 492 00:14:49,708 --> 00:14:50,750 - No. - Oh, come on. 493 00:14:50,875 --> 00:14:52,791 Bri-Bri is a badass name, dude. 494 00:14:52,916 --> 00:14:54,625 I knew a Bri-Bri in the army once. 495 00:14:54,750 --> 00:14:56,583 Bri-Bri once used a severed arm of a Taliban 496 00:14:56,708 --> 00:14:58,375 to diffuse an IED in a sewer. 497 00:14:58,500 --> 00:15:00,125 [chuckles] 498 00:15:00,250 --> 00:15:02,625 [sighs] I miss Bri-Bri. 499 00:15:02,750 --> 00:15:04,125 Was he killed in action? 500 00:15:04,250 --> 00:15:08,000 No, got crushed by a van leaving Chipotle. 501 00:15:08,125 --> 00:15:09,791 What about one Bri? Is that cool? 502 00:15:09,916 --> 00:15:13,041 - Sure. - Okay, Bri... 503 00:15:13,166 --> 00:15:14,708 Bri. 504 00:15:14,833 --> 00:15:17,458 Okay. Uh, Lucas. Let's get going, bud. 505 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:18,708 - What do you say, you know? - Already? 506 00:15:18,833 --> 00:15:20,541 - Yeah. - We just got here. 507 00:15:20,666 --> 00:15:22,291 Yeah, I know but your mother wanted us back 508 00:15:22,416 --> 00:15:23,375 for dinner and things. 509 00:15:23,500 --> 00:15:24,458 We got to get ready. 510 00:15:24,583 --> 00:15:26,541 - Dad, it's 10 in the morning. - I... 511 00:15:26,666 --> 00:15:28,375 But CJ invited me over his house. 512 00:15:28,500 --> 00:15:29,500 He just moved here 513 00:15:29,625 --> 00:15:31,125 and he said there's a tree in his backyard 514 00:15:31,250 --> 00:15:33,166 that looks just like Mark Ruffalo. 515 00:15:33,291 --> 00:15:34,791 Freakin' uncanny. 516 00:15:34,916 --> 00:15:35,958 It's why we rented the place. 517 00:15:36,083 --> 00:15:38,583 So can we go over their house, please? 518 00:15:38,708 --> 00:15:39,625 CJ's cool. 519 00:15:39,750 --> 00:15:41,166 He said my hoodie's dope. 520 00:15:41,291 --> 00:15:42,666 It is a pretty dope ass hoodie. 521 00:15:42,791 --> 00:15:44,083 Please? 522 00:15:45,541 --> 00:15:47,250 [groans softly] 523 00:15:47,375 --> 00:15:48,625 Sure, sure. All right. Why not. 524 00:15:48,750 --> 00:15:53,625 [dramatic rock music] 525 00:15:53,750 --> 00:15:55,083 - Hell yeah, dude! - Yeah, okay. 526 00:15:55,208 --> 00:15:56,083 Fuck yeah! 527 00:15:56,208 --> 00:15:57,375 CJ, game on! 528 00:15:57,500 --> 00:15:58,416 They're coming to our place, bro. 529 00:15:58,541 --> 00:15:59,875 Up high. 530 00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:01,125 - Whoa. - Mm. 531 00:16:01,250 --> 00:16:02,708 Doesn't totally get high fives. 532 00:16:02,833 --> 00:16:04,416 [groans] 533 00:16:04,541 --> 00:16:06,041 You wanna dance? 534 00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:08,375 [both grunting] 535 00:16:09,458 --> 00:16:10,375 [grunts] 536 00:16:10,500 --> 00:16:12,083 I said submit! 537 00:16:12,208 --> 00:16:13,250 Submit! 538 00:16:13,375 --> 00:16:15,083 No, CJ! No! Release. 539 00:16:15,208 --> 00:16:16,208 [grunts] 540 00:16:16,333 --> 00:16:18,041 CJ, stand down! 541 00:16:18,166 --> 00:16:19,166 CJ, stop it! 542 00:16:19,291 --> 00:16:22,500 [grunting] 543 00:16:24,583 --> 00:16:25,916 Little dude's super strong. 544 00:16:26,041 --> 00:16:27,375 Oh, yeah. 545 00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:29,250 You guys go on ahead while I put him out real quick. 546 00:16:29,375 --> 00:16:30,500 - Okay, yeah. - Okay, yeah. 547 00:16:30,625 --> 00:16:32,791 - Go to sleep. Sleep. - We're gonna go. 548 00:16:32,916 --> 00:16:34,750 [pants, laughs awkwardly] 549 00:16:34,875 --> 00:16:36,000 I'm so excited to be here. 550 00:16:36,125 --> 00:16:38,583 Yeah, don't get too comfortable, all right? 551 00:16:38,708 --> 00:16:41,250 I texted your mom our location, you know, just in case. 552 00:16:41,375 --> 00:16:42,833 Well, just in case what? 553 00:16:42,958 --> 00:16:44,750 In case the guy murders us. 554 00:16:44,875 --> 00:16:46,000 - Hey! - Hey. 555 00:16:46,125 --> 00:16:47,750 - Come in, come in. - Hey, CJ. What's up? 556 00:16:47,875 --> 00:16:49,916 - [strains hard] - [groans] 557 00:16:50,041 --> 00:16:51,041 - Okay. - Don't let go. 558 00:16:51,166 --> 00:16:52,291 All right. 559 00:16:52,416 --> 00:16:53,583 - There we go. - Yeah. 560 00:16:53,708 --> 00:16:55,083 Hey, I'm good. 561 00:16:55,208 --> 00:16:56,583 - Missed you, buddy. - [weakly] Yeah, nice to see you. 562 00:16:56,708 --> 00:16:57,625 We're still unpacking, 563 00:16:57,750 --> 00:16:59,291 but I did clean the place up for you. 564 00:16:59,416 --> 00:17:02,750 [clattering and clanking] 565 00:17:02,875 --> 00:17:03,750 [toy squeaks] 566 00:17:03,875 --> 00:17:05,500 Sorry. I'm beat, man. 567 00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:07,500 - Yeah. - CJ barely sleeps. 568 00:17:07,625 --> 00:17:08,958 Lucky if he gets two hours a night. 569 00:17:09,083 --> 00:17:10,500 Two hours? That can't be healthy. 570 00:17:10,625 --> 00:17:11,625 Yeah, it's fine. 571 00:17:11,750 --> 00:17:13,416 What's that old saying? 572 00:17:13,541 --> 00:17:15,125 Kids are like horses? 573 00:17:16,833 --> 00:17:19,791 No, no one's ever said that at all. 574 00:17:20,875 --> 00:17:22,583 Wow. Were you in the Army? 575 00:17:22,708 --> 00:17:24,250 I was. 576 00:17:24,375 --> 00:17:26,333 Well, that's Bri-Bri with Commander Colonel Kurtz. 577 00:17:26,458 --> 00:17:28,708 First Special Forces Operational Detachment. 578 00:17:28,833 --> 00:17:29,833 Delta Force. 579 00:17:29,958 --> 00:17:31,583 Whoa. Delta Force? 580 00:17:31,708 --> 00:17:33,041 Yeah. You know, one time, 581 00:17:33,166 --> 00:17:35,291 I saw two guys get their heads blown off. 582 00:17:35,416 --> 00:17:37,583 [laughs] One guy bled out in my arms 583 00:17:37,708 --> 00:17:40,208 while I slowly watched him die. 584 00:17:40,333 --> 00:17:42,208 Sick, right? 585 00:17:42,333 --> 00:17:43,875 - Right? - Mm-hmm. 586 00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:45,083 - [whispers] Jesus. - Wow. 587 00:17:45,208 --> 00:17:46,875 Pretty crazy story. 588 00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,375 I'm sure you got a lot more, but if you tell me, 589 00:17:48,500 --> 00:17:50,208 you're gonna have to kill me, right? 590 00:17:50,333 --> 00:17:51,291 - [tense music] - I am gonna have to kill you. 591 00:17:51,416 --> 00:17:52,708 Hey, hey, hey! Take it easy! 592 00:17:52,833 --> 00:17:53,708 - Hey! - [gunfire] 593 00:17:53,833 --> 00:17:55,083 [ketchup splatters] 594 00:17:55,208 --> 00:17:56,541 Oh, shit. 595 00:17:56,666 --> 00:17:58,125 Oh, my God. I'm sorry. There was some left in there. 596 00:17:58,250 --> 00:17:59,250 Oh, God. 597 00:17:59,375 --> 00:18:01,166 It's a ketchup dispenser. 598 00:18:01,291 --> 00:18:02,708 Came with a matching mustard gun. 599 00:18:02,833 --> 00:18:04,083 Isn't that fun? 600 00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:06,583 Let me get you a paper towel. 601 00:18:06,708 --> 00:18:08,208 Hey, Dad. Dad. 602 00:18:08,333 --> 00:18:09,958 Isn't Jeff super cool and strong, 603 00:18:10,083 --> 00:18:13,041 and look how big he is. 604 00:18:13,166 --> 00:18:16,291 Yeah, he's big, but it's-- it's genetics, you know? 605 00:18:16,416 --> 00:18:18,125 I mean, I'm sure his dad was very big, 606 00:18:18,250 --> 00:18:21,500 and his mother was an American bison. 607 00:18:21,625 --> 00:18:24,583 Plus, when you get that big, you don't live that long. 608 00:18:24,708 --> 00:18:25,666 Okay, whatever. 609 00:18:25,791 --> 00:18:27,000 Uh, CJ, want to go outside 610 00:18:27,125 --> 00:18:28,416 so I can show you some more dance moves? 611 00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:29,583 Hell yeah! 612 00:18:29,708 --> 00:18:31,916 - [both chuckle] - [laughs] 613 00:18:32,041 --> 00:18:33,791 Oh, you're okay with him cursing like that? 614 00:18:33,916 --> 00:18:35,666 Yeah, words can't hurt anyone. 615 00:18:35,791 --> 00:18:36,958 Worst case, I tell him to go to bed, 616 00:18:37,083 --> 00:18:39,583 he calls me a buck-tooth bitch. [laughs] 617 00:18:39,708 --> 00:18:40,666 [laughs awkwardly] 618 00:18:40,791 --> 00:18:42,166 All right. 619 00:18:42,291 --> 00:18:43,958 If you don't mind me asking, I mean, where's CJ's mom? 620 00:18:44,083 --> 00:18:46,666 Oh, she passed away a few months ago. 621 00:18:46,791 --> 00:18:48,333 - [mug thuds] - Yeah, she was real sick. 622 00:18:48,458 --> 00:18:49,708 - [clanks] - Sorry to hear about that. 623 00:18:49,833 --> 00:18:51,875 That's all right. She was gonna die anyway. 624 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:53,083 That's why we moved to a new town. 625 00:18:53,208 --> 00:18:54,666 Make a fresh start, you know? 626 00:18:54,791 --> 00:18:56,666 Had some money saved up from a security gig. 627 00:18:56,791 --> 00:18:57,875 Thought I'd do the stay-at-home-dad thing 628 00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:00,250 while CJ gets acclimated. 629 00:19:00,375 --> 00:19:01,625 What about you? 630 00:19:01,750 --> 00:19:03,000 Your wife croak too? 631 00:19:03,125 --> 00:19:05,125 No. She's alive and well at work. 632 00:19:05,250 --> 00:19:06,416 - Oh. - Yeah. 633 00:19:06,541 --> 00:19:08,541 She's a lawyer. I'm a forensic accountant. 634 00:19:08,666 --> 00:19:10,250 Oh, forensics? 635 00:19:10,375 --> 00:19:11,583 Like autopsies and stuff? 636 00:19:11,708 --> 00:19:13,666 Forensic accountant. 637 00:19:13,791 --> 00:19:15,875 Oh, that's boring. 638 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,291 [CJ grunts] 639 00:19:18,708 --> 00:19:20,958 [bird caws] 640 00:19:21,083 --> 00:19:24,416 So what does CJ stand for anyway? 641 00:19:24,541 --> 00:19:26,625 Christopher Jif. 642 00:19:26,750 --> 00:19:28,375 - Like the peanut butter? - Uh-huh. 643 00:19:28,500 --> 00:19:31,166 Like this peanut butter? 644 00:19:31,291 --> 00:19:34,041 The one you looked at right before you said Jif? 645 00:19:34,166 --> 00:19:35,375 Yeah, I looked at the peanut butter 646 00:19:35,500 --> 00:19:37,416 because I was thinking of making us 647 00:19:37,541 --> 00:19:38,875 some peanut butter sandwiches, 648 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:40,958 which was CJ's mom's favorite food, 649 00:19:41,083 --> 00:19:43,416 which is why his middle name is Jif. 650 00:19:43,541 --> 00:19:45,083 [quirky music] 651 00:19:45,208 --> 00:19:47,458 Oh, hey, look at that fun list of stuff I did for me and CJ 652 00:19:47,583 --> 00:19:49,708 to do now that his mom went tits-up. 653 00:19:49,833 --> 00:19:52,000 - One, make new friends. - Check. 654 00:19:52,125 --> 00:19:54,875 - Go to Buckee Cheese. - Oh, love Buckee Cheese. 655 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:58,041 Do ayahuasca in the desert. 656 00:19:58,166 --> 00:20:00,625 He's gonna love that. 657 00:20:00,750 --> 00:20:03,500 [speaking together] Freak out the fat lady across the street. 658 00:20:03,625 --> 00:20:04,958 [laughs] 659 00:20:05,083 --> 00:20:06,125 [laughs awkwardly] 660 00:20:06,250 --> 00:20:08,208 Dad? Dad? 661 00:20:08,333 --> 00:20:10,250 There's a guy in the backyard watching us. 662 00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:11,416 Where? 663 00:20:11,541 --> 00:20:12,625 Lucas is just kidding. 664 00:20:12,750 --> 00:20:14,083 No, I'm not. I'm serious. 665 00:20:14,208 --> 00:20:15,458 There's a guy out there. 666 00:20:15,583 --> 00:20:17,291 - He's just staring at us. - Come on, Lucas. 667 00:20:17,416 --> 00:20:18,500 Hey, I got an idea. 668 00:20:18,625 --> 00:20:19,708 Why don't we go get lunch? 669 00:20:19,833 --> 00:20:21,291 - You guys like Buckee Cheese? - Sure. 670 00:20:21,416 --> 00:20:22,583 You can help us cross it off the list. 671 00:20:22,708 --> 00:20:23,958 - Can we, Dad? - Of course we can. 672 00:20:24,083 --> 00:20:26,250 Uh, you know, he's got a dance lesson. 673 00:20:26,375 --> 00:20:27,666 [Lucas] No, I don't. 674 00:20:27,791 --> 00:20:30,166 Hope no one's allergic to fun. 675 00:20:30,291 --> 00:20:31,375 I know I'm not. 676 00:20:31,500 --> 00:20:33,083 Okay. Pile in, boys. 677 00:20:33,208 --> 00:20:34,583 What the hell is with all the gray Odysseys? 678 00:20:34,708 --> 00:20:39,750 [suspenseful music] 679 00:20:42,458 --> 00:20:44,125 [upbeat music] 680 00:20:44,250 --> 00:20:46,250 [kids chattering, screaming] 681 00:20:46,375 --> 00:20:47,333 This is awesome, right? 682 00:20:47,458 --> 00:20:49,291 - [kid] You suck. - [kid 2] Creeper. 683 00:20:51,166 --> 00:20:53,541 Man, that kid is fearless. 684 00:20:53,666 --> 00:20:56,083 Look at him hanging upside down from-- 685 00:20:56,208 --> 00:20:57,791 what's he hanging upside down on? 686 00:20:57,916 --> 00:20:59,333 That would be the sprinkler system. 687 00:20:59,458 --> 00:21:01,916 Oh. Well, you know what they say. 688 00:21:02,041 --> 00:21:03,291 A kid falls and cracks his skull, 689 00:21:03,416 --> 00:21:05,125 - that's how they learn, right? - Mm, no. 690 00:21:05,250 --> 00:21:06,250 No, that's not how they-- 691 00:21:06,375 --> 00:21:07,625 no one's ever said that. 692 00:21:07,750 --> 00:21:09,791 Look at how happy he is. 693 00:21:09,916 --> 00:21:11,125 You know, this is the first time 694 00:21:11,250 --> 00:21:13,541 I've ever seen him smile. 695 00:21:13,666 --> 00:21:16,125 You never--you never seen your kid smile? 696 00:21:16,250 --> 00:21:18,208 Since his mom died. 697 00:21:18,333 --> 00:21:19,666 Yeah, like, I'm--I'm--I'm sorry. 698 00:21:19,791 --> 00:21:20,791 You know, I can't imagine what you guys-- 699 00:21:20,916 --> 00:21:23,083 Man, God is so good. 700 00:21:23,208 --> 00:21:25,416 You know, the first day my son meets his new best friend, 701 00:21:25,541 --> 00:21:26,750 so did I. 702 00:21:26,875 --> 00:21:28,541 [kid] Fathead. 703 00:21:28,666 --> 00:21:30,541 - Do you want to start a band? - No. 704 00:21:30,666 --> 00:21:33,333 Um, well, you know, uh--Jeff, look, I--I-- 705 00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:34,541 First of all, this is--this is great. 706 00:21:34,666 --> 00:21:35,833 - I know. - Yeah, and you... 707 00:21:35,958 --> 00:21:37,500 you just seem like a great guy. 708 00:21:37,625 --> 00:21:39,166 - You do. You got the thing. - [slurping] 709 00:21:39,291 --> 00:21:41,458 And--and things are moving kind of fast with this whole thing. 710 00:21:41,583 --> 00:21:43,250 Like, a lot is going on in my life right now 711 00:21:43,375 --> 00:21:45,541 and it feels like, you know, you're asking a lot, you know? 712 00:21:45,666 --> 00:21:47,333 So first of all, I want to tell you about myself. 713 00:21:47,458 --> 00:21:48,875 I've recently got married. 714 00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:50,708 - [foreboding music] - [Brian's voice fades] 715 00:21:50,833 --> 00:21:53,208 It just feels like I gotta concentrate on that. 716 00:21:53,333 --> 00:21:55,250 [foreboding music continues] 717 00:21:55,375 --> 00:21:58,166 [Brian's voice is not heard] 718 00:22:03,500 --> 00:22:05,166 [Brian's voice in normal volume] You really can't be best friends 719 00:22:05,291 --> 00:22:07,541 with somebody when things are moving so fast 720 00:22:07,666 --> 00:22:09,541 when you don't know someone so well. 721 00:22:09,666 --> 00:22:11,583 I mean--Oh, no, no. 722 00:22:11,708 --> 00:22:13,458 Listen, I didn't mean-- I didn't mean it like that. 723 00:22:13,583 --> 00:22:18,458 [suspenseful music] 724 00:22:21,666 --> 00:22:22,958 Hello, miss. 725 00:22:23,083 --> 00:22:25,125 Can I get the super socks for 500 tickets, please? 726 00:22:32,333 --> 00:22:33,791 Thanks. 727 00:22:35,458 --> 00:22:38,750 [suspenseful music continues] 728 00:22:39,958 --> 00:22:41,458 - [coins clank] - [plastic thuds] 729 00:22:47,791 --> 00:22:49,541 - [coins clanking] - [slow motion] Whoa. 730 00:22:49,666 --> 00:22:50,750 Holy shit! 731 00:22:50,875 --> 00:22:52,708 - Dude, what the hell? - You broke his face! 732 00:22:52,833 --> 00:22:54,250 Sorry, I thought he was a friend of mine. 733 00:22:54,375 --> 00:22:55,333 [♪ KC & The Sunshine Band: “Boogie Shoes”] 734 00:22:55,458 --> 00:22:56,750 [teenage employee 2 groans] 735 00:22:56,875 --> 00:22:57,833 [upbeat music] 736 00:22:57,958 --> 00:22:59,333 Holy shit! 737 00:23:00,583 --> 00:23:01,458 [teenage employee 2 screams] 738 00:23:01,583 --> 00:23:02,666 No, no, no, no! Aahhh! 739 00:23:03,875 --> 00:23:06,250 - [slurps] - [children laughing] 740 00:23:06,375 --> 00:23:07,583 [exhales] 741 00:23:07,708 --> 00:23:09,458 [Buckee] Well, hello. 742 00:23:09,583 --> 00:23:11,375 Play with me, camper. 743 00:23:11,500 --> 00:23:13,125 [irritated groan] No. 744 00:23:13,250 --> 00:23:14,916 [teenage employee 2] Oh, my God! [screams] 745 00:23:15,041 --> 00:23:16,583 [teenage employee 1] Holy shit! Is this real? 746 00:23:17,916 --> 00:23:19,208 [teenage employee 2] Somebody help us! 747 00:23:19,333 --> 00:23:20,250 - [Buckee giggles] - Get your hands off me. 748 00:23:20,375 --> 00:23:21,291 Give me a hug! 749 00:23:21,416 --> 00:23:22,750 - No, no hug. - Love me! 750 00:23:22,875 --> 00:23:23,875 Get the hell away from me, you freaking weirdo. 751 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:25,625 [groans in slow motion] 752 00:23:25,750 --> 00:23:27,583 [teenage employee 2] Aahh! Please stop! 753 00:23:27,708 --> 00:23:28,625 [costume slits] 754 00:23:30,083 --> 00:23:31,583 [teenage employee 2] Oh my God. Mommy! 755 00:23:33,500 --> 00:23:34,375 Hey, give me--hey! 756 00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:37,041 Ooh, shiny. 757 00:23:37,166 --> 00:23:38,250 Stupid! 758 00:23:38,375 --> 00:23:39,708 Who wants to be tickled? 759 00:23:39,833 --> 00:23:40,708 [Buckee groans] 760 00:23:40,833 --> 00:23:41,708 - That's enough. - Dude. 761 00:23:41,833 --> 00:23:42,791 Just give me a hug, man. 762 00:23:42,916 --> 00:23:43,875 You just grabbed love handles. 763 00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:44,958 You don't do that. 764 00:23:45,083 --> 00:23:48,250 [grunting, straining] 765 00:23:48,375 --> 00:23:49,666 [teenage employee 3] No, no, no! 766 00:23:50,875 --> 00:23:51,958 Don't be such a baby! 767 00:23:52,083 --> 00:23:53,208 Give me a hug, man! 768 00:23:53,333 --> 00:23:54,250 What's your problem? 769 00:23:54,375 --> 00:23:55,791 - Smile! - Take the photo! 770 00:23:55,916 --> 00:23:57,333 - Smile! - Take the photo, man! 771 00:23:57,458 --> 00:23:58,333 - [camera shutter clicking] - Just relax! 772 00:23:58,458 --> 00:24:00,291 - I'm not paying for that. - Yes, you are. 773 00:24:00,416 --> 00:24:01,333 - Thanks, Lucy! - Stop it. 774 00:24:01,458 --> 00:24:03,458 Ow! Asshole! 775 00:24:03,583 --> 00:24:05,125 [Buckee blows raspberry] 776 00:24:05,250 --> 00:24:07,500 [quirky action music] 777 00:24:07,625 --> 00:24:09,708 Welcome to the jungle, bitch! 778 00:24:09,833 --> 00:24:11,708 [straining] 779 00:24:11,833 --> 00:24:14,916 [grunts] 780 00:24:15,041 --> 00:24:17,041 I'm gonna kick your ass! 781 00:24:23,166 --> 00:24:24,250 [kids gasp] 782 00:24:24,375 --> 00:24:25,625 [Jeff groans] 783 00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:28,041 How'd you find me? 784 00:24:30,833 --> 00:24:32,041 How'd you--? 785 00:24:32,166 --> 00:24:34,416 [whimsical music] 786 00:24:34,541 --> 00:24:36,166 [fast-forwarding sound] 787 00:24:36,291 --> 00:24:37,500 [man on speaker] All right, shooters... 788 00:24:37,625 --> 00:24:39,083 [kids snicker] 789 00:24:39,208 --> 00:24:40,583 [man on speaker] ...hoedown. 790 00:24:40,708 --> 00:24:42,750 ...moves, shoot it! Let them critters have it! 791 00:24:42,875 --> 00:24:43,958 [indistinct] 792 00:24:44,083 --> 00:24:46,041 - [rapid firing of pellets] - [grunting] 793 00:24:46,166 --> 00:24:47,625 Come on, big bitch! 794 00:24:47,750 --> 00:24:49,750 - Okay. - Yippee ki-yay, mother--! 795 00:24:51,083 --> 00:24:52,333 - Hey, Dad! - Hey, guys. 796 00:24:52,458 --> 00:24:53,708 Guess you missed freakin' Buckee. 797 00:24:53,833 --> 00:24:55,000 What a freakin'-- 798 00:24:55,125 --> 00:24:56,500 Hey, look at that, pizza's here. 799 00:24:56,625 --> 00:24:57,791 Thank you so much. 800 00:24:57,916 --> 00:24:59,583 All right, guys, dig in. 801 00:24:59,708 --> 00:25:00,750 What's that? 802 00:25:02,041 --> 00:25:03,333 What is what? 803 00:25:03,458 --> 00:25:05,291 Haven't you ever had pizza before? 804 00:25:05,416 --> 00:25:06,791 No. 805 00:25:06,916 --> 00:25:07,916 [scoffs] 806 00:25:09,166 --> 00:25:11,125 Your--your dad's never taken you for pizza? 807 00:25:11,250 --> 00:25:12,166 Jeff's not my dad. 808 00:25:12,291 --> 00:25:13,291 [ominous music] 809 00:25:13,416 --> 00:25:14,833 Jeff's not your dad? 810 00:25:14,958 --> 00:25:15,958 No. 811 00:25:17,208 --> 00:25:18,916 Who... who is he? 812 00:25:19,041 --> 00:25:20,166 I don't know. 813 00:25:20,291 --> 00:25:21,208 He just took me. 814 00:25:21,333 --> 00:25:23,166 [music intensifies] 815 00:25:23,291 --> 00:25:24,375 All right, that's it. I knew something was wrong. 816 00:25:24,500 --> 00:25:25,708 Everybody get up, get up. Get up right now. 817 00:25:25,833 --> 00:25:26,958 Come with me. 818 00:25:27,083 --> 00:25:28,708 Let's go. 819 00:25:28,833 --> 00:25:30,916 Look, ma'am, this is an emergency, okay? 820 00:25:31,041 --> 00:25:32,000 His wristband doesn't match yours. 821 00:25:32,125 --> 00:25:33,500 Okay, you're--you're okay with a kid 822 00:25:33,625 --> 00:25:35,208 dangling from a sprinkler system, 823 00:25:35,333 --> 00:25:36,458 but all of a sudden an adult wants to leave 824 00:25:36,583 --> 00:25:37,875 with a kid that's not his, 825 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:39,916 and you have a problem with that? 826 00:25:40,041 --> 00:25:41,458 That didn't come out right, but look--look, 827 00:25:41,583 --> 00:25:42,875 do I--do I look like a predator? 828 00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:43,958 Yeah. 829 00:25:44,083 --> 00:25:44,916 Is it the windbreaker? 830 00:25:45,041 --> 00:25:46,833 Yeah. 831 00:25:46,958 --> 00:25:47,833 No! 832 00:25:47,958 --> 00:25:49,166 Slow down! 833 00:25:50,500 --> 00:25:51,500 - [whispers] Sorry. - Look, do you know this man? 834 00:25:51,625 --> 00:25:53,541 No. I don't know any of these people. 835 00:25:53,666 --> 00:25:55,166 That's a lie. That's a lie right there. 836 00:25:55,291 --> 00:25:56,750 You lie. We met today at the park. 837 00:25:56,875 --> 00:25:57,708 - You don't remember meeting us-- - Buckee, thank you. 838 00:25:57,833 --> 00:25:58,958 - Please. - What's up, pal? 839 00:25:59,083 --> 00:26:00,958 - Okay. - You're a tough guy now? 840 00:26:01,083 --> 00:26:02,125 We've been through this already. 841 00:26:03,875 --> 00:26:05,125 - [hostess] Buckee, look out! - [Buckee] Oh, shit. 842 00:26:05,250 --> 00:26:07,541 [others scream] 843 00:26:07,666 --> 00:26:09,166 [hostess] Buckee! Holy shit! 844 00:26:09,291 --> 00:26:10,791 - Come here, man. - [groans] 845 00:26:10,916 --> 00:26:12,000 [alarm blaring] 846 00:26:12,125 --> 00:26:12,958 You guys stay with me. Stay with me. 847 00:26:13,083 --> 00:26:14,208 Hey, Lucas, stop. 848 00:26:14,333 --> 00:26:15,458 Hey, trust me, you don't have a choice. 849 00:26:15,583 --> 00:26:17,833 Hop in, boys. Seat belts. 850 00:26:17,958 --> 00:26:19,583 Hey, why did CJ tell us you're not his dad? 851 00:26:19,708 --> 00:26:20,875 Because I'm not. 852 00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:22,708 Okay. Lucas, get out of the van. 853 00:26:22,833 --> 00:26:24,416 I can't. 854 00:26:24,541 --> 00:26:26,083 I'm sick of this shit. 855 00:26:26,208 --> 00:26:27,750 Bring it, bitch. 856 00:26:27,875 --> 00:26:29,708 Who the hell are you? 857 00:26:29,833 --> 00:26:30,916 [dramatic strings] 858 00:26:31,041 --> 00:26:31,958 Who's that guy? 859 00:26:32,083 --> 00:26:33,250 A guy who wants to kill you. 860 00:26:33,375 --> 00:26:35,666 [cars revving] 861 00:26:35,791 --> 00:26:36,958 - Who are they? - They want to kill you, too. 862 00:26:37,083 --> 00:26:38,250 - Why? - Because they think you know. 863 00:26:38,375 --> 00:26:39,541 Know what? 864 00:26:39,666 --> 00:26:40,583 [Jeff] Get in, Bri! 865 00:26:40,708 --> 00:26:41,541 - [gunshot] - [Buckee screams] 866 00:26:41,666 --> 00:26:42,666 [Buckee] Shit! Man! 867 00:26:42,791 --> 00:26:44,125 [gunshot, bullet ricochets] 868 00:26:44,250 --> 00:26:45,250 I don't know anything. 869 00:26:45,375 --> 00:26:46,708 Why would they think I know? 870 00:26:46,833 --> 00:26:48,416 [♪ The Spencer Davis Group: “Gimme Some Lovin'”] 871 00:26:48,541 --> 00:26:51,166 ♪ Twenty people knocking 'cos they're wanting some more ♪ 872 00:26:51,291 --> 00:26:53,625 ♪ Let me in baby, I don't know what you've got ♪ 873 00:26:54,750 --> 00:26:56,083 [tires screeching] 874 00:26:57,291 --> 00:26:59,666 [tires screeching] 875 00:26:59,791 --> 00:27:01,458 - Dad, what's going on? - Nothing. 876 00:27:01,583 --> 00:27:02,791 We're just having a little fun. 877 00:27:02,916 --> 00:27:03,833 It's just some fun, right guys? 878 00:27:03,958 --> 00:27:04,916 - You guys having fun? - Not really. 879 00:27:05,041 --> 00:27:06,708 Okay, get those seat belts on now! 880 00:27:06,833 --> 00:27:08,333 [car honks] 881 00:27:09,458 --> 00:27:10,708 [tires screech] 882 00:27:10,833 --> 00:27:12,916 [car honks] 883 00:27:13,041 --> 00:27:14,166 [car honks] 884 00:27:15,375 --> 00:27:16,458 [Lucas] He's got a gun! 885 00:27:16,583 --> 00:27:17,916 No, no. What the hell is that? 886 00:27:18,041 --> 00:27:19,583 [gunfire echoes] 887 00:27:19,708 --> 00:27:22,833 [tires screeching] 888 00:27:22,958 --> 00:27:24,125 [gunfire] 889 00:27:27,583 --> 00:27:28,416 [Brian] What are you doing? 890 00:27:28,541 --> 00:27:30,041 We're on a freeway. 891 00:27:31,375 --> 00:27:32,708 [tires screech] 892 00:27:32,833 --> 00:27:34,125 [gunfire] 893 00:27:34,250 --> 00:27:36,833 [tires screech] 894 00:27:36,958 --> 00:27:38,166 [gunfire] 895 00:27:39,416 --> 00:27:41,208 Just tell me what the hell is going on. 896 00:27:41,333 --> 00:27:42,833 Hey buddies, put some headphones on 897 00:27:42,958 --> 00:27:45,125 and throw in one of my DVDs back there. 898 00:27:46,791 --> 00:27:48,291 [man on TV] Doctor Hannibal Lecter. 899 00:27:48,416 --> 00:27:49,416 [soft, tense music] 900 00:27:50,541 --> 00:27:51,458 Can you just tell me? 901 00:27:51,583 --> 00:27:53,500 Look, they're not after me. 902 00:27:53,625 --> 00:27:54,750 They're after CJ. 903 00:27:54,875 --> 00:27:56,500 CJ? Why are they after him? 904 00:27:56,625 --> 00:27:58,291 Because I rescued him from some very bad people. 905 00:27:58,416 --> 00:27:59,625 What--what kind of bad people? 906 00:27:59,750 --> 00:28:01,791 - I don't know, bad people. - Okay, that's it. 907 00:28:01,916 --> 00:28:03,041 Do me a favor, pull--pull over right now. 908 00:28:03,166 --> 00:28:04,708 - Let us out. - Oh, no way. 909 00:28:04,833 --> 00:28:05,750 You've got one too. 910 00:28:05,875 --> 00:28:07,833 What the hell? Are you kidding me? 911 00:28:07,958 --> 00:28:09,208 [Jeff] Oh, your child abduction photo 912 00:28:09,333 --> 00:28:10,166 is way better than mine. 913 00:28:10,291 --> 00:28:11,250 Amber Bros. 914 00:28:11,375 --> 00:28:13,333 Okay, pull the car over right now. 915 00:28:13,458 --> 00:28:14,708 I'm calling the cops. That's it, you're done. 916 00:28:14,833 --> 00:28:16,500 Probably not a good idea 917 00:28:16,625 --> 00:28:17,958 with the whole Amber alert and all, huh? 918 00:28:18,083 --> 00:28:19,000 The hell's my phone? 919 00:28:19,125 --> 00:28:20,458 Fuck! 920 00:28:20,583 --> 00:28:21,833 I left it at Buckee Cheese. 921 00:28:21,958 --> 00:28:23,625 I'm not turning around, Bri-Bri. 922 00:28:23,750 --> 00:28:25,125 The hostess at Buckee Cheese thought I was, 923 00:28:25,250 --> 00:28:27,125 you know, kidnapping the kids. 924 00:28:27,250 --> 00:28:28,208 Do I look like a child predator? 925 00:28:28,333 --> 00:28:29,375 It's the windbreaker. 926 00:28:29,500 --> 00:28:30,791 [car screen ringing] 927 00:28:30,916 --> 00:28:31,916 [in-car voice assistant] Incoming call from Emily. 928 00:28:32,041 --> 00:28:33,750 Dad, why is Mom calling Jeff? 929 00:28:33,875 --> 00:28:36,625 Oh, uh, because I gave Mom Jeff's contact info 930 00:28:36,750 --> 00:28:37,750 - in case-- - In case what? 931 00:28:37,875 --> 00:28:38,875 In case things went really well, 932 00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:40,458 and then we became, like, best friends. 933 00:28:40,583 --> 00:28:41,416 We're all just, like, hanging out together. 934 00:28:41,541 --> 00:28:42,541 It's like, hey-- 935 00:28:42,666 --> 00:28:43,625 Well, we don't want to disappoint her. 936 00:28:43,750 --> 00:28:44,708 No, no, no, no. 937 00:28:44,833 --> 00:28:46,833 Emily! Hey, how you doing sweetie? 938 00:28:46,958 --> 00:28:50,000 Oh, hi. Um, is this Jeff? 939 00:28:50,125 --> 00:28:51,041 [Jeff] Hit me with it girl. 940 00:28:51,166 --> 00:28:52,083 I can't wait to meet you in person. 941 00:28:52,208 --> 00:28:53,416 I've heard so many good things. 942 00:28:53,541 --> 00:28:55,208 - Okay, hey-- - Brian won't shut up about you. 943 00:28:55,333 --> 00:28:56,208 - Hey, Em. - [Emily] Hey. 944 00:28:56,333 --> 00:28:57,541 Jeff sounds so nice. 945 00:28:57,666 --> 00:28:59,250 You said he was some kind of like dumbass weirdo. 946 00:28:59,375 --> 00:29:00,541 [Brian] No, no, no, no. He's not a weirdo. 947 00:29:00,666 --> 00:29:02,375 No, no, no. I said he's like a speirdo. 948 00:29:02,500 --> 00:29:04,791 He carries a lot of spirit and funness. 949 00:29:04,916 --> 00:29:06,041 [Emily] Oh, a speirdo? 950 00:29:06,166 --> 00:29:07,708 Well, look at you making friends. 951 00:29:07,833 --> 00:29:09,208 Oh, wow. 952 00:29:09,333 --> 00:29:10,458 Are you guys in like a high speed chase or something? 953 00:29:10,583 --> 00:29:11,625 Second one today. 954 00:29:11,750 --> 00:29:12,708 Crazy shit, right? 955 00:29:14,500 --> 00:29:15,583 It's insane indeed. 956 00:29:15,708 --> 00:29:17,375 Hey, how's that conference going? 957 00:29:17,500 --> 00:29:18,625 [Emily] Pretty eventful, actually. 958 00:29:18,750 --> 00:29:20,500 You'll never guess who I ran into. 959 00:29:20,625 --> 00:29:21,916 That's awesome. Say hi for me. 960 00:29:22,041 --> 00:29:24,166 [phone beeping] 961 00:29:24,291 --> 00:29:26,041 [tires screech] 962 00:29:26,166 --> 00:29:27,041 Buckle in, boys. 963 00:29:27,166 --> 00:29:28,208 What are you doing? 964 00:29:28,333 --> 00:29:29,458 Relax, Bri. 965 00:29:29,583 --> 00:29:32,041 Just let me do my thing. 966 00:29:32,166 --> 00:29:33,208 [♪ Corona: “The Rhythm of The Night”] 967 00:29:33,333 --> 00:29:35,083 ♪ This is the rhythm of the night ♪ 968 00:29:35,208 --> 00:29:36,625 ♪ The night... ♪ 969 00:29:36,750 --> 00:29:37,916 [tires screech] 970 00:29:38,041 --> 00:29:39,166 [car honks] 971 00:29:39,291 --> 00:29:41,583 ♪ This is the rhythm of the night ♪ 972 00:29:45,166 --> 00:29:47,125 [strains] 973 00:29:47,250 --> 00:29:48,500 [Brian] Hey, hey. Slow down. 974 00:29:48,625 --> 00:29:49,833 - [tires screech] - You're gonna kill someone. 975 00:29:49,958 --> 00:29:50,833 [Lucas screaming] 976 00:29:50,958 --> 00:29:51,875 Hey, hey, hey! 977 00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:53,333 ♪ Take me to the... ♪ 978 00:29:53,458 --> 00:29:55,041 [screaming] 979 00:29:55,166 --> 00:29:56,333 What are you crazy? 980 00:29:56,458 --> 00:29:58,250 [laughs] 981 00:29:58,375 --> 00:29:59,375 [woman] Oh, my God. 982 00:29:59,500 --> 00:30:00,833 [panicked screaming] 983 00:30:02,958 --> 00:30:04,666 ♪ Feel you give me love again ♪ 984 00:30:04,791 --> 00:30:06,708 [tires screech] 985 00:30:06,833 --> 00:30:07,875 [screams] 986 00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:09,500 Whoa. 987 00:30:09,625 --> 00:30:12,958 ♪ Round and round we go each time I hear you say ♪ 988 00:30:13,083 --> 00:30:14,416 - [tires screech] - [kids groan] 989 00:30:14,541 --> 00:30:17,333 ♪ This is the rhythm of the night ♪ 990 00:30:17,458 --> 00:30:20,125 ♪ The night, oh yeah ♪ 991 00:30:20,250 --> 00:30:21,541 - [whistle blows] - [traffic officer] Hey, stop! 992 00:30:21,666 --> 00:30:23,083 - Stop! - No, no, no. 993 00:30:23,208 --> 00:30:24,125 - Move. - [Brian] No, no, no. 994 00:30:24,250 --> 00:30:25,333 - Move. - [whistle blows] 995 00:30:25,458 --> 00:30:26,458 - Move. - No! 996 00:30:26,583 --> 00:30:28,291 Move. 997 00:30:28,416 --> 00:30:29,708 [shouts] Read the signs! 998 00:30:29,833 --> 00:30:30,791 They're suggestions. 999 00:30:30,916 --> 00:30:32,541 ♪ The rhythm of the night ♪ 1000 00:30:32,666 --> 00:30:34,708 [♪] 1001 00:30:34,833 --> 00:30:37,500 [shouts] Hands on the wheel! Hands on the wheel! 1002 00:30:37,625 --> 00:30:39,500 - [car honks] - [Brian] [shouts] Oh my God! 1003 00:30:41,583 --> 00:30:42,916 [woman screams] 1004 00:30:43,041 --> 00:30:44,250 [Jeff] Go, go, go! 1005 00:30:44,375 --> 00:30:46,541 [Brian] [shouts] No! Holy shit! 1006 00:30:46,666 --> 00:30:48,125 [tires screech] 1007 00:30:48,250 --> 00:30:49,458 - [shouts] Hey, there's a baby! - [Lucas] Baby. 1008 00:30:49,583 --> 00:30:51,000 There's a baby! 1009 00:30:51,125 --> 00:30:52,500 - Run! - [parents scream] 1010 00:30:52,625 --> 00:30:53,625 [baby cries] 1011 00:30:53,750 --> 00:30:55,291 Are you purposely trying to hit people? 1012 00:30:55,416 --> 00:30:57,291 - Uh-uh. Oh, shit. - No! 1013 00:30:57,416 --> 00:30:59,041 ♪ This is the rhythm of the night ♪ 1014 00:30:59,166 --> 00:31:00,125 [lemonade kid screaming] 1015 00:31:00,250 --> 00:31:01,541 ♪ The night ♪ 1016 00:31:01,666 --> 00:31:03,083 - [lemonade kid sobs] - ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 1017 00:31:03,208 --> 00:31:04,416 Ha-ha. 1018 00:31:04,541 --> 00:31:05,375 - ♪ The rhythm of the night ♪ - It's you. 1019 00:31:05,500 --> 00:31:06,958 - No! - It's on you. 1020 00:31:07,083 --> 00:31:09,083 Take the wheel. All right. 1021 00:31:09,208 --> 00:31:11,041 - Whoo! - Keep going. 1022 00:31:13,083 --> 00:31:13,916 [tires screech] 1023 00:31:15,125 --> 00:31:17,750 [Brian] Look out! Oh, my God. 1024 00:31:17,875 --> 00:31:18,708 [kid screams] 1025 00:31:19,958 --> 00:31:23,083 [traffic noise] 1026 00:31:23,208 --> 00:31:25,125 [man 2 on car screen] We got a problem here? 1027 00:31:25,250 --> 00:31:27,041 We got a problem here? 1028 00:31:27,166 --> 00:31:29,041 We got a problem? 1029 00:31:29,166 --> 00:31:31,541 [siren wailing] 1030 00:31:31,666 --> 00:31:32,583 [Lucas] Oh, shit. 1031 00:31:32,708 --> 00:31:33,875 [Lucas] Dad, the police. 1032 00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:35,625 Oh my god! Are you serious? 1033 00:31:35,750 --> 00:31:37,000 Still want me to pull over? 1034 00:31:37,125 --> 00:31:38,625 Remember, you're a child abductor. 1035 00:31:38,750 --> 00:31:39,958 You're a child abductor, Dad? 1036 00:31:40,083 --> 00:31:41,166 - Put your headphones on. - He is. 1037 00:31:41,291 --> 00:31:44,250 [siren wailing] 1038 00:31:44,375 --> 00:31:46,125 [Brian] Man, what are we gonna do? 1039 00:31:50,416 --> 00:31:53,041 Boom! That was cool of them, right? 1040 00:31:53,166 --> 00:31:58,166 [dramatic music] 1041 00:31:58,291 --> 00:31:59,750 [cars revving] 1042 00:31:59,875 --> 00:32:00,791 Look at this. 1043 00:32:00,916 --> 00:32:02,041 It's like our tribe. 1044 00:32:02,166 --> 00:32:03,708 The Mama Mafia. 1045 00:32:03,833 --> 00:32:05,541 A bunch of drunk ass soccer moms. 1046 00:32:05,666 --> 00:32:06,708 Probably on their way to have lunch. 1047 00:32:06,833 --> 00:32:07,833 What kind of food? 1048 00:32:07,958 --> 00:32:08,833 [♪ Knock Hard: “Uninvited”] 1049 00:32:08,958 --> 00:32:10,375 ♪ They wanna let me in ♪ 1050 00:32:10,500 --> 00:32:13,541 ♪ but they're watching my game ESPN ♪ 1051 00:32:13,666 --> 00:32:15,916 ♪ studying the moves, trying to replicate... ♪ 1052 00:32:16,041 --> 00:32:17,750 [car alarm buzzes] 1053 00:32:17,875 --> 00:32:20,041 Oh, shit. 1054 00:32:20,166 --> 00:32:22,375 A fricking pedo drives one of ours. 1055 00:32:23,750 --> 00:32:25,000 What--what are you doing? 1056 00:32:25,125 --> 00:32:28,000 Blending in, Bri. Watch this shit. 1057 00:32:28,125 --> 00:32:30,000 [Brian] Easy, easy. Whoa, whoa! 1058 00:32:30,125 --> 00:32:31,375 [tires screeching] 1059 00:32:31,500 --> 00:32:32,791 What the hell's she doing? 1060 00:32:32,916 --> 00:32:34,375 - What the hell are you doing? - Look, I can't be seen. 1061 00:32:34,500 --> 00:32:36,000 You got an Amber alert on you, bro. 1062 00:32:36,125 --> 00:32:37,791 I think we're way past that. 1063 00:32:37,916 --> 00:32:40,041 Ladies, our day has finally come. 1064 00:32:40,166 --> 00:32:42,250 Pedo on the parkway, and he's right behind me. 1065 00:32:42,375 --> 00:32:43,666 [Jessica] Oh my god, Leslie. What do we do? 1066 00:32:43,791 --> 00:32:45,291 Assume the diamond formation. 1067 00:32:45,416 --> 00:32:46,916 This is what we train for, ladies. 1068 00:32:47,041 --> 00:32:48,041 [neck cracks] 1069 00:32:48,166 --> 00:32:49,250 [Jessica] Roger that. I'm going in. 1070 00:32:49,375 --> 00:32:50,625 Watch my six, Marla. 1071 00:32:50,750 --> 00:32:52,000 [Leslie] Let's castrate this mother-- 1072 00:32:52,125 --> 00:32:53,625 Whoa. Whoa. Hey, hey. Why are you slowing down? 1073 00:32:53,750 --> 00:32:55,208 Cuz your girlfriends are boxing me in. 1074 00:32:55,333 --> 00:32:56,833 [tires screech] 1075 00:32:56,958 --> 00:32:57,958 It's on, Bri. 1076 00:32:58,083 --> 00:32:59,000 I'm gonna ram the shit out of ‘em. 1077 00:32:59,125 --> 00:33:00,375 Yeah, ram ‘em. 1078 00:33:00,500 --> 00:33:01,750 No, do not ram them. 1079 00:33:01,875 --> 00:33:04,833 [car revving] 1080 00:33:04,958 --> 00:33:06,416 Oh, shit. 1081 00:33:06,541 --> 00:33:08,000 - She's hot, bro. - [Brian] Don't start with her. 1082 00:33:08,125 --> 00:33:10,166 [car revs] 1083 00:33:10,291 --> 00:33:11,708 Dude, she's a firecracker. 1084 00:33:11,833 --> 00:33:13,333 I don't think I can kill this one. 1085 00:33:14,625 --> 00:33:15,625 What? 1086 00:33:15,750 --> 00:33:16,583 [tires screech] 1087 00:33:16,708 --> 00:33:18,041 Whoa. Shit. 1088 00:33:18,166 --> 00:33:19,166 What up, bitch? 1089 00:33:19,291 --> 00:33:20,416 Oh, I'm the bitch? 1090 00:33:20,541 --> 00:33:21,583 I'm the bitch?! 1091 00:33:21,708 --> 00:33:23,333 [tires screech, crashes] 1092 00:33:23,458 --> 00:33:24,958 Can we not try and kill her, please? 1093 00:33:25,083 --> 00:33:28,166 [suspenseful music] 1094 00:33:28,291 --> 00:33:29,166 [gun cocks] 1095 00:33:30,458 --> 00:33:32,333 Eli! Eli, take your earphones out. 1096 00:33:32,458 --> 00:33:34,125 Get Mama's taser from her purse. 1097 00:33:35,291 --> 00:33:37,416 No, not that one, the other taser. 1098 00:33:37,541 --> 00:33:40,500 Yeah, you're gonna put your Fortnite skills to use, sweetie. 1099 00:33:40,625 --> 00:33:42,333 See that dickface in the front seat? 1100 00:33:43,750 --> 00:33:44,708 No. 1101 00:33:44,833 --> 00:33:45,833 That's man's a pervert. 1102 00:33:45,958 --> 00:33:47,375 What do we do to perverts, honey? 1103 00:33:47,500 --> 00:33:49,375 We zap him in the ball sack. 1104 00:33:49,500 --> 00:33:50,583 Face works too, honey. 1105 00:33:50,708 --> 00:33:52,083 Make Mama proud. 1106 00:33:52,208 --> 00:33:53,666 [taser whirrs] 1107 00:33:53,791 --> 00:33:55,291 Little minion's trying to execute me, dude. 1108 00:33:55,416 --> 00:33:56,375 Just shut the window. 1109 00:33:56,500 --> 00:33:58,041 I'm not backing down, Brian. 1110 00:33:58,166 --> 00:33:59,458 - He's the enemy. - He's 12! 1111 00:33:59,583 --> 00:34:00,833 Exactly! 1112 00:34:00,958 --> 00:34:02,500 Eli, what the hell are you waiting for? 1113 00:34:02,625 --> 00:34:03,583 Take him down! 1114 00:34:04,833 --> 00:34:06,375 You ain't gonna do it. You ain't shit, bro. 1115 00:34:06,500 --> 00:34:08,125 You ain't shit! 1116 00:34:08,250 --> 00:34:09,625 [car tires screech, thuds] 1117 00:34:09,750 --> 00:34:10,708 [taser crackling] 1118 00:34:10,833 --> 00:34:13,708 [screaming] 1119 00:34:13,833 --> 00:34:14,958 Oh my god! 1120 00:34:15,083 --> 00:34:16,583 Did you just see that? 1121 00:34:16,708 --> 00:34:18,000 [tires screech] 1122 00:34:18,125 --> 00:34:19,375 [grunting] 1123 00:34:22,833 --> 00:34:23,750 [Lucas] Dad, they're not stopping! 1124 00:34:23,875 --> 00:34:25,000 What are we gonna do? 1125 00:34:25,125 --> 00:34:26,416 Relax, Bri. 1126 00:34:26,541 --> 00:34:28,250 These things have a way of working themselves out. 1127 00:34:28,375 --> 00:34:29,208 [truck honks] 1128 00:34:29,333 --> 00:34:30,333 Ooh. 1129 00:34:30,458 --> 00:34:31,958 You see what I'm saying, Bri? 1130 00:34:32,083 --> 00:34:33,750 Woo! Yes! 1131 00:34:33,875 --> 00:34:35,333 Oh my, pound it, dude! 1132 00:34:35,458 --> 00:34:36,458 - Pound it! - [Brian] No! 1133 00:34:36,583 --> 00:34:37,583 I'm not pounding it! 1134 00:34:37,708 --> 00:34:39,208 [Jeff laughs] 1135 00:34:43,833 --> 00:34:45,208 - Whoo! - Whoo! 1136 00:34:45,333 --> 00:34:46,916 All right, that's it. We're out of here. 1137 00:34:47,041 --> 00:34:48,125 Totally. 1138 00:34:48,250 --> 00:34:49,250 Let's take a breather, Bri-Bri. 1139 00:34:49,375 --> 00:34:50,458 Stop calling me Bri-Bri, okay? 1140 00:34:50,583 --> 00:34:51,458 We're not friends. 1141 00:34:51,583 --> 00:34:52,958 Wow. 1142 00:34:53,083 --> 00:34:54,791 What the hell is that? 1143 00:34:54,916 --> 00:34:56,250 Thanks to your creepy Amber alert, 1144 00:34:56,375 --> 00:34:57,333 we got to steal another one. 1145 00:34:57,458 --> 00:34:58,458 You stole that? 1146 00:34:58,583 --> 00:35:00,708 You think I bought some bitch-ass minivan? 1147 00:35:00,833 --> 00:35:02,125 That's it. CJ, Lucas, we are going. 1148 00:35:02,250 --> 00:35:03,416 We're out of here. 1149 00:35:03,541 --> 00:35:04,416 You're not taking CJ. 1150 00:35:04,541 --> 00:35:05,791 Oh, I absolutely am. 1151 00:35:05,916 --> 00:35:07,166 - Where are you gonna go? - Home. 1152 00:35:07,291 --> 00:35:08,250 Out of here. 1153 00:35:08,375 --> 00:35:09,791 Away from this freaking insanity. 1154 00:35:09,916 --> 00:35:10,750 - [screaming] - [tires screeching] 1155 00:35:10,875 --> 00:35:11,750 - Yeah. - [loud crash] 1156 00:35:11,875 --> 00:35:12,791 [man] Oh, my God! 1157 00:35:12,916 --> 00:35:14,416 Not a good idea, Bri-Bri. 1158 00:35:16,375 --> 00:35:18,666 Really? Why not? 1159 00:35:18,791 --> 00:35:20,375 ‘Cause they're gonna find you and your family 1160 00:35:20,500 --> 00:35:22,583 and murder the shit out of every last one of you. 1161 00:35:22,708 --> 00:35:23,625 [faint rattle] 1162 00:35:23,750 --> 00:35:24,708 What's your problem? 1163 00:35:24,833 --> 00:35:27,166 Hey, Lucas, stay in eyesight, huh? 1164 00:35:27,291 --> 00:35:28,458 How are they gonna find me, huh? 1165 00:35:28,583 --> 00:35:30,041 Cause they found me, Bri. 1166 00:35:30,166 --> 00:35:31,625 And I drove 200 miles to escape 'em. 1167 00:35:31,750 --> 00:35:33,000 Ugh. 1168 00:35:35,166 --> 00:35:36,250 Okay. 1169 00:35:36,375 --> 00:35:37,833 [whimsical music] 1170 00:35:41,708 --> 00:35:43,000 Wait. 1171 00:35:43,125 --> 00:35:44,708 Okay, if I tell you the story, you gotta promise 1172 00:35:44,833 --> 00:35:46,458 - to keep an open mind. - [sighs] 1173 00:35:46,583 --> 00:35:48,166 You don't look like you're gonna keep an open mind. 1174 00:35:48,291 --> 00:35:50,291 I will keep an open mind. Can you just go? 1175 00:35:50,416 --> 00:35:53,083 So remember that security gig I took when I left the army? 1176 00:35:54,333 --> 00:35:56,666 Well, it was at this top secret building. 1177 00:35:56,791 --> 00:35:58,541 I didn't know who owned it or what went on in there 1178 00:35:58,666 --> 00:36:00,750 because I was never allowed inside. 1179 00:36:00,875 --> 00:36:02,291 The job was pretty strenuous. 1180 00:36:02,416 --> 00:36:04,041 Lots of problem solving. 1181 00:36:04,166 --> 00:36:06,458 And I got to pretend I was Kung Fu freaking Panda, 1182 00:36:06,583 --> 00:36:07,750 which was pretty freaking awesome. 1183 00:36:07,875 --> 00:36:08,791 Hiya! 1184 00:36:08,916 --> 00:36:10,500 [clanks softly] 1185 00:36:10,625 --> 00:36:12,708 So all I was told to do was patrol the area 1186 00:36:12,833 --> 00:36:15,000 and submit to random drug tests, Ow. 1187 00:36:15,125 --> 00:36:16,750 which I have no idea how I passed, 1188 00:36:16,875 --> 00:36:20,750 'cause there's like literally no chance I passed. 1189 00:36:20,875 --> 00:36:23,166 Anyway, so when I was working this top secret building, 1190 00:36:23,291 --> 00:36:24,583 the only other employee I ever saw there 1191 00:36:24,708 --> 00:36:25,666 was this bearded dude 1192 00:36:25,791 --> 00:36:28,333 who looked just like Zach Galifianakis. 1193 00:36:28,458 --> 00:36:30,666 But it wasn't him, 'cause I asked him once and he said, 1194 00:36:30,791 --> 00:36:32,583 "No, but I get that all the time." 1195 00:36:32,708 --> 00:36:35,291 You see, we were never allowed to give our real names. 1196 00:36:35,416 --> 00:36:38,375 So I just called him Galifianak-ish. 1197 00:36:38,500 --> 00:36:40,166 So a few weeks ago, 1198 00:36:40,291 --> 00:36:42,375 this truck pulls up to the warehouse with a package, 1199 00:36:42,500 --> 00:36:43,750 which was super weird 1200 00:36:43,875 --> 00:36:45,416 because I don't even have an Amazon account. 1201 00:36:46,541 --> 00:36:48,208 [car hinges creak] 1202 00:36:48,333 --> 00:36:49,875 I didn't want to leave it outside all night 1203 00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:51,166 in case it was something super important, 1204 00:36:51,291 --> 00:36:52,541 like the Ark of the Covenant. 1205 00:36:52,666 --> 00:36:53,708 [owl hooting] 1206 00:36:54,875 --> 00:36:56,125 [door alarm buzzes] 1207 00:36:56,250 --> 00:36:57,416 So I brought it in. 1208 00:36:59,666 --> 00:37:00,666 [laughs] And that's when I heard it. 1209 00:37:00,791 --> 00:37:02,750 - [loud thud] - Oh, shit. 1210 00:37:02,875 --> 00:37:04,916 You're surrounded, asshole! 1211 00:37:05,041 --> 00:37:06,666 We're--we're all gonna blow your head off. 1212 00:37:06,791 --> 00:37:08,208 [answered knock on wall] 1213 00:37:08,333 --> 00:37:09,708 Oh my god. Who's there? 1214 00:37:09,833 --> 00:37:11,458 [CJ] I'm in here. 1215 00:37:11,583 --> 00:37:12,625 [Jeff] So I busted through the door 1216 00:37:12,750 --> 00:37:14,250 because I'm big and freaking awesome. 1217 00:37:14,375 --> 00:37:17,291 [gentle piano chords] 1218 00:37:17,416 --> 00:37:18,833 And then what did I do? 1219 00:37:18,958 --> 00:37:20,208 [♪ Harry Nilsson: “Without You”] 1220 00:37:20,333 --> 00:37:22,416 ♪ I can't live... ♪ 1221 00:37:22,541 --> 00:37:25,000 I rescued him like a rescuer. 1222 00:37:25,125 --> 00:37:26,500 Like the Yellowstone guy from The Bodyguard , 1223 00:37:26,625 --> 00:37:29,541 but way more badass and cool. 1224 00:37:29,666 --> 00:37:31,125 ♪ I can't give... ♪ 1225 00:37:31,250 --> 00:37:33,583 And there you have it. 1226 00:37:33,708 --> 00:37:35,208 - There you have it? - Yeah. 1227 00:37:35,333 --> 00:37:37,375 You are gorilla-ass crazy. 1228 00:37:37,500 --> 00:37:38,833 Do you understand that? 1229 00:37:38,958 --> 00:37:40,375 [♪ Scott Lee Miller: “Destroy”] ♪ Destroy ♪ 1230 00:37:40,500 --> 00:37:42,083 Agh! 1231 00:37:42,208 --> 00:37:43,708 Liquid Psycho. 1232 00:37:43,833 --> 00:37:45,666 This stuff's amazing, huh? 1233 00:37:45,791 --> 00:37:48,458 [both gulping] 1234 00:37:48,583 --> 00:37:51,000 A thousand milligrams of caffeine. 1235 00:37:51,125 --> 00:37:52,583 Is that a lot? 1236 00:37:55,916 --> 00:37:57,625 I mean, I feel like I'm on fire. 1237 00:37:57,750 --> 00:38:01,416 Like I'm riding a dragon, like, like I'm white lightning! 1238 00:38:01,541 --> 00:38:04,333 [rock music] 1239 00:38:04,458 --> 00:38:06,500 [man] Kids! Kids! 1240 00:38:06,625 --> 00:38:08,833 [passerby] Oh my god! Calm down! 1241 00:38:11,125 --> 00:38:12,750 [growling] 1242 00:38:12,875 --> 00:38:14,916 [♪ Léo Delibes: “Flower Duet”] 1243 00:38:15,041 --> 00:38:16,750 [upbeat music] 1244 00:38:16,875 --> 00:38:18,125 [both screaming] 1245 00:38:18,250 --> 00:38:22,916 [♪ Léo Delibes: “Flower Duet”] 1246 00:38:23,041 --> 00:38:25,708 [upbeat music] 1247 00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:28,791 [suspenseful music] 1248 00:38:28,916 --> 00:38:30,625 [car tire screeches] 1249 00:38:30,750 --> 00:38:33,500 [suspenseful music continues] 1250 00:38:34,666 --> 00:38:38,333 [phone beeping] 1251 00:38:38,458 --> 00:38:42,583 [tracker beeping] 1252 00:38:46,833 --> 00:38:48,541 [cars revving] 1253 00:38:51,208 --> 00:38:52,958 Now, who are these guys? 1254 00:38:53,083 --> 00:38:55,041 Why don't we just go to the cops? 1255 00:38:55,166 --> 00:38:58,583 Well, there was a little misunderstanding. 1256 00:38:58,708 --> 00:39:00,000 What type of misunderstanding? 1257 00:39:00,125 --> 00:39:02,708 Good morning. So here's the deal. 1258 00:39:02,833 --> 00:39:05,041 He's not my kid, but he's definitely someone's kid, 1259 00:39:05,166 --> 00:39:06,041 so I had to steal him away. 1260 00:39:06,166 --> 00:39:07,583 But now that I stole him, 1261 00:39:07,708 --> 00:39:10,958 I think someone's coming after us trying to kill us. 1262 00:39:11,083 --> 00:39:12,416 You guys know what I'm saying, right? 1263 00:39:13,541 --> 00:39:14,541 [♪ Harry Nilsson: “Without You”] 1264 00:39:14,625 --> 00:39:17,666 ♪ I can't live ♪ 1265 00:39:18,375 --> 00:39:21,708 - ♪ if living is without you ♪ - [gunshot echoes] 1266 00:39:21,833 --> 00:39:24,791 ♪ Can't live ♪ 1267 00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:27,000 That is quite a misunderstanding. 1268 00:39:27,125 --> 00:39:28,583 Right? 1269 00:39:28,708 --> 00:39:33,666 So cops are kind of out of the question now. 1270 00:39:33,791 --> 00:39:34,833 What? 1271 00:39:34,958 --> 00:39:36,916 [distant chatter] 1272 00:39:37,041 --> 00:39:41,916 [foreboding music] 1273 00:39:47,500 --> 00:39:48,416 Is he coming? 1274 00:39:48,541 --> 00:39:50,291 Check it. I stole these. 1275 00:39:52,333 --> 00:39:53,666 No freakin' way. 1276 00:39:53,791 --> 00:39:55,208 Pukas. 1277 00:39:55,333 --> 00:39:56,958 What's up, Pukas? 1278 00:39:57,083 --> 00:39:58,083 Is this your new girlfriend? 1279 00:39:58,208 --> 00:39:59,375 [mean kid laughs] 1280 00:39:59,500 --> 00:40:01,250 [distant car revving] 1281 00:40:01,375 --> 00:40:02,750 We got a problem here? 1282 00:40:02,875 --> 00:40:03,750 [♪ N.W.A.: “Straight Outta Compton”] 1283 00:40:03,875 --> 00:40:07,166 We got a problem here, punk ass? 1284 00:40:08,416 --> 00:40:10,750 - [mean kids gasp] - [mean kid] Oh, shit. 1285 00:40:10,875 --> 00:40:11,791 You're frickin' dead. 1286 00:40:11,916 --> 00:40:12,833 ♪ Straight outta Compton ♪ 1287 00:40:12,958 --> 00:40:15,083 ♪ crazy brotha named Ice Cube ♪ 1288 00:40:15,208 --> 00:40:17,041 ♪ from the stupid-dope gang wit a attitude ♪ 1289 00:40:17,166 --> 00:40:18,250 ♪ So when I'm in your neighborhood ♪ 1290 00:40:18,375 --> 00:40:19,458 ♪ you better duck ♪ 1291 00:40:19,583 --> 00:40:21,750 ♪ 'cause Ice Cube is crazy as...♪ 1292 00:40:21,875 --> 00:40:24,291 ♪ as I leave believe I'm stompin' now ♪ 1293 00:40:26,041 --> 00:40:27,208 [mean kid grunts] 1294 00:40:28,750 --> 00:40:30,750 - Yeah! - ♪ Compton ♪ 1295 00:40:30,875 --> 00:40:32,458 So nothing you've told me is true. 1296 00:40:32,583 --> 00:40:34,000 There's no dead wife. 1297 00:40:34,125 --> 00:40:35,250 Well, that's good news, right? 1298 00:40:35,375 --> 00:40:36,791 Okay. So let me get this straight. 1299 00:40:36,916 --> 00:40:39,208 There's a group of hardcore guys out there that wanna kill me 1300 00:40:39,333 --> 00:40:41,916 and my entire family, all because you stole CJ 1301 00:40:42,041 --> 00:40:43,208 from some secret facility. 1302 00:40:43,333 --> 00:40:44,250 - Is that it? - Yeah. 1303 00:40:44,375 --> 00:40:46,208 Anything else you lied about? 1304 00:40:46,333 --> 00:40:47,875 [awkward laugh] Actually, I might have lied 1305 00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:48,875 about something else. 1306 00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:50,125 Yeah, I'm feeling that. 1307 00:40:50,250 --> 00:40:53,541 CJ's name isn't Christopher Jif. 1308 00:40:53,666 --> 00:40:54,791 It's not? 1309 00:40:54,916 --> 00:40:55,875 That's a peanut butter. 1310 00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:57,375 I don't know what it stands for. 1311 00:40:57,500 --> 00:40:59,750 So, you're right, Bri. 1312 00:40:59,875 --> 00:41:01,625 All we have is each other now. 1313 00:41:01,750 --> 00:41:03,041 I never said that. 1314 00:41:03,166 --> 00:41:04,791 Lucas, CJ, let's go. 1315 00:41:04,958 --> 00:41:05,833 Where the hell are they? 1316 00:41:05,958 --> 00:41:07,625 Lucas! CJ! 1317 00:41:07,750 --> 00:41:08,958 CJ! 1318 00:41:09,083 --> 00:41:10,416 - [car revving] - [tires screech] 1319 00:41:10,541 --> 00:41:11,500 - [woman screams] - [Brian] Oh, my God! 1320 00:41:11,625 --> 00:41:12,583 They found us. 1321 00:41:14,708 --> 00:41:15,625 [car revving] 1322 00:41:15,750 --> 00:41:16,583 [Brian] What are you doing? 1323 00:41:16,708 --> 00:41:17,583 Stealing a car. 1324 00:41:17,708 --> 00:41:20,875 Eenie-meenie-miney-mo. 1325 00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:23,333 Now is this meant to be or is this meant to be? 1326 00:41:23,458 --> 00:41:25,041 - I'm gonna get my kid. - Bri-Bri! 1327 00:41:26,125 --> 00:41:27,291 Damn it. 1328 00:41:30,833 --> 00:41:33,166 [phone beeping] 1329 00:41:38,208 --> 00:41:41,125 [faint music] 1330 00:41:41,250 --> 00:41:42,708 - [suspenseful music] - Lucas! 1331 00:41:48,500 --> 00:41:49,833 Lucas! 1332 00:41:49,958 --> 00:41:51,750 - [woman] What's happening? - Lucas! 1333 00:41:51,875 --> 00:41:53,625 [woman] She brought a casserole. It was awful. 1334 00:41:57,000 --> 00:42:01,875 [foreboding music] 1335 00:42:05,500 --> 00:42:06,875 [car revs] 1336 00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:08,375 - Lucas! - [woman] What's going on? 1337 00:42:09,708 --> 00:42:11,166 Lucas! 1338 00:42:11,291 --> 00:42:12,916 [gunshot] 1339 00:42:13,041 --> 00:42:14,291 [woman] Oh, my God! 1340 00:42:18,333 --> 00:42:20,541 [panicked screaming] 1341 00:42:20,666 --> 00:42:22,041 Lucas! 1342 00:42:22,166 --> 00:42:26,541 [suspenseful music] 1343 00:42:26,666 --> 00:42:28,000 Lucas! 1344 00:42:31,583 --> 00:42:32,583 [gasps] 1345 00:42:32,708 --> 00:42:34,250 It's okay. It's okay. 1346 00:42:34,375 --> 00:42:35,875 I got you, all right? 1347 00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:40,125 - You're safe, you're safe. - No, no. Where's Jeff? 1348 00:42:40,250 --> 00:42:41,375 We don't need Jeff, okay? 1349 00:42:41,500 --> 00:42:43,583 No, we gotta find Jeff. 1350 00:42:43,708 --> 00:42:45,916 He needs to protect us, Dad. 1351 00:42:46,041 --> 00:42:47,500 We gotta find him. 1352 00:42:49,958 --> 00:42:51,208 No, no, no! 1353 00:42:51,333 --> 00:42:52,541 [Lucas] No! 1354 00:42:52,666 --> 00:42:53,666 No! No, no, no! No! 1355 00:42:53,791 --> 00:42:56,000 - [gunman grunts] - [tires screech] 1356 00:42:56,125 --> 00:42:57,208 You see that? 1357 00:42:57,333 --> 00:42:58,583 Sick, right? 1358 00:42:58,708 --> 00:43:00,250 [laughs] God, I'm good! 1359 00:43:00,375 --> 00:43:01,750 Okay, not bad. 1360 00:43:01,875 --> 00:43:03,250 [tires screech] 1361 00:43:04,875 --> 00:43:07,625 [dramatic music] 1362 00:43:07,750 --> 00:43:08,875 Dad, they're still coming. 1363 00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:10,750 Go, go, go, go! 1364 00:43:12,833 --> 00:43:13,708 Are they coming? 1365 00:43:13,833 --> 00:43:15,083 [music trails off] 1366 00:43:16,416 --> 00:43:17,791 How do they keep finding us? 1367 00:43:17,916 --> 00:43:19,625 You thinking Treadstone? 1368 00:43:19,750 --> 00:43:21,166 Okay, that's a movie. That's not real. 1369 00:43:21,291 --> 00:43:22,541 You know, the way they track Matt Damon. 1370 00:43:22,666 --> 00:43:24,666 You know, everything on us is traceable. 1371 00:43:24,791 --> 00:43:26,708 That's it. They have my phone. 1372 00:43:26,833 --> 00:43:28,625 They're--they're tracking Lucas with my phone. 1373 00:43:28,750 --> 00:43:30,083 Okay, Lucas, take your GPS button 1374 00:43:30,208 --> 00:43:31,208 and turn it off, okay? 1375 00:43:31,333 --> 00:43:32,208 And keep it off. 1376 00:43:32,333 --> 00:43:33,375 [GPS tracker beeps] 1377 00:43:33,500 --> 00:43:34,458 Yeah, keep it off, Lucas. 1378 00:43:34,583 --> 00:43:36,375 This is all your fault. 1379 00:43:36,500 --> 00:43:37,375 I'm kidding, dude. 1380 00:43:37,500 --> 00:43:38,791 I'm kidding. 1381 00:43:38,916 --> 00:43:41,291 It's mostly your fault, but not all your fault. 1382 00:43:41,416 --> 00:43:42,833 Thanks for what you did back there. 1383 00:43:44,041 --> 00:43:46,000 That was really cool of you. 1384 00:43:46,125 --> 00:43:47,000 Cool. 1385 00:43:47,125 --> 00:43:48,166 [chuckles] 1386 00:43:50,666 --> 00:43:52,916 - [groans] - Ow. 1387 00:43:53,041 --> 00:43:55,416 [car revving] 1388 00:43:55,541 --> 00:43:58,375 [Brian] Huh, this is crazy. 1389 00:43:58,500 --> 00:44:00,375 I don't even know what I'm thinking, man. 1390 00:44:00,500 --> 00:44:02,458 - What? - Can't even be a good dad. 1391 00:44:02,583 --> 00:44:04,000 What are you talking about? 1392 00:44:04,125 --> 00:44:06,416 You're the one who saved him, Bri. 1393 00:44:06,541 --> 00:44:08,416 You're a great dad. 1394 00:44:08,541 --> 00:44:11,125 And you got a great kid. 1395 00:44:11,250 --> 00:44:12,375 Kid who loves you. 1396 00:44:13,833 --> 00:44:15,041 I don't know about that. 1397 00:44:17,041 --> 00:44:21,208 You know... I gotta tell you being a stepdad is... 1398 00:44:21,333 --> 00:44:24,875 I thought I'd have kids in my 20s or 30s. 1399 00:44:25,000 --> 00:44:25,958 That didn't happen. 1400 00:44:26,083 --> 00:44:27,541 I was okay with that. 1401 00:44:27,666 --> 00:44:29,916 But then they put Emily in my life 1402 00:44:30,041 --> 00:44:32,583 and I was like, wow, you know, this amazing woman 1403 00:44:32,708 --> 00:44:35,833 who's kind of out of my league. 1404 00:44:35,958 --> 00:44:38,541 Totally out of your league. Like way, way out. 1405 00:44:38,666 --> 00:44:39,916 - Okay. - Like looks. 1406 00:44:40,041 --> 00:44:41,958 - Yeah, that. - Personality. 1407 00:44:42,083 --> 00:44:43,333 Pretty much every way possible. 1408 00:44:43,458 --> 00:44:45,791 I got it. I got what you're saying. 1409 00:44:45,916 --> 00:44:47,500 And she came with this kid... 1410 00:44:50,208 --> 00:44:52,416 [gentle music] 1411 00:44:52,541 --> 00:44:58,458 and he started calling me Dad and I was like, “Oh, man.” 1412 00:44:58,583 --> 00:45:01,541 You know, I don't know how to do this stuff, you know? 1413 00:45:01,666 --> 00:45:05,375 And I thought I didn't even deserve to be called Dad. 1414 00:45:05,500 --> 00:45:09,166 I started feeling bad for him, you know? 1415 00:45:09,291 --> 00:45:11,666 He got saddled with an old guy like me. 1416 00:45:11,791 --> 00:45:14,125 What are you, a cool guy like you? 1417 00:45:14,250 --> 00:45:16,375 Bri, you're a great guy. 1418 00:45:16,500 --> 00:45:20,416 Like, I'd kill to have a dad like you. 1419 00:45:20,541 --> 00:45:22,958 And the way you take care of him is so cool. 1420 00:45:23,083 --> 00:45:27,958 [soft, uneasy music] 1421 00:45:30,666 --> 00:45:33,208 We gotta get them some place safe, okay? 1422 00:45:33,333 --> 00:45:35,666 Some place completely off the grid. 1423 00:45:37,166 --> 00:45:40,083 I know just the place. 1424 00:45:40,208 --> 00:45:42,416 They'll never find us. 1425 00:45:42,541 --> 00:45:47,625 [mellow music] 1426 00:45:47,750 --> 00:45:49,583 This is where we're hiding out? 1427 00:45:49,708 --> 00:45:50,958 Sick, right? 1428 00:45:52,125 --> 00:45:53,583 - [old man gasps] - [woman screams] 1429 00:45:53,708 --> 00:45:54,583 [car door closes] 1430 00:45:56,125 --> 00:45:56,958 [door knocking] 1431 00:45:57,583 --> 00:45:59,833 - Look at you. - [woman] Gordon, I'm naked! 1432 00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:02,208 - Jeff? - Hey, Gordon. 1433 00:46:02,333 --> 00:46:03,375 Hey. 1434 00:46:03,500 --> 00:46:04,500 Brian, this is Gordon, 1435 00:46:04,625 --> 00:46:06,916 - my estranged deadbeat dad. - Pleasure. 1436 00:46:07,041 --> 00:46:09,375 That's Lucas, Brian's son, and this here is CJ. 1437 00:46:09,500 --> 00:46:12,250 Ah, you never told me you had a kid. 1438 00:46:12,375 --> 00:46:13,250 I don't have a kid. 1439 00:46:13,375 --> 00:46:15,583 Are you blind? 1440 00:46:15,708 --> 00:46:18,375 He's the spitting image of you when you were his age. 1441 00:46:18,500 --> 00:46:20,333 I think. 1442 00:46:20,458 --> 00:46:23,125 Did, uh, Jeff mention I abandoned him 1443 00:46:23,250 --> 00:46:24,166 when he was four? 1444 00:46:24,291 --> 00:46:25,333 Not yet, no, no. 1445 00:46:25,458 --> 00:46:26,500 Good. Good. 1446 00:46:26,625 --> 00:46:27,833 Well, come on in. 1447 00:46:27,958 --> 00:46:29,833 Let's go. 1448 00:46:29,958 --> 00:46:31,875 Hey, can you believe he's still mad at me 1449 00:46:32,000 --> 00:46:34,750 for something that happened 30 years ago? 1450 00:46:34,875 --> 00:46:37,458 You dropped me off in an orphanage for girls. 1451 00:46:37,583 --> 00:46:40,625 And you're welcome. [chuckles] 1452 00:46:40,750 --> 00:46:43,125 Brian, [clears throat] when--when his mom died, 1453 00:46:43,250 --> 00:46:45,291 I mean, I just--I panicked. 1454 00:46:45,416 --> 00:46:47,083 It was just me. 1455 00:46:47,208 --> 00:46:49,875 I was young, stupid. 1456 00:46:50,000 --> 00:46:53,625 I was afraid I was in over my head being a dad, 1457 00:46:53,750 --> 00:46:57,083 but kept tabs on you, didn't I? 1458 00:46:57,208 --> 00:46:59,333 Here we go. This is what I want to show you. 1459 00:46:59,458 --> 00:47:00,791 Here we go. 1460 00:47:00,916 --> 00:47:06,041 See, you two are dead ringers. 1461 00:47:06,166 --> 00:47:10,708 Oh, look at my little Jeffy with all his foster families. 1462 00:47:10,833 --> 00:47:12,750 You're a lucky bastard. 1463 00:47:12,875 --> 00:47:14,041 Well... 1464 00:47:14,166 --> 00:47:15,375 He's not wrong. 1465 00:47:15,500 --> 00:47:16,541 He looks just like you. 1466 00:47:16,666 --> 00:47:20,125 CJ's my son? 1467 00:47:20,250 --> 00:47:22,375 [soft, inquisitive music] 1468 00:47:22,500 --> 00:47:23,458 What's going on here? 1469 00:47:23,583 --> 00:47:24,583 How's that even possible? 1470 00:47:24,708 --> 00:47:26,125 Do you even know who his mom is? 1471 00:47:26,250 --> 00:47:27,916 Due to my deep-seated emotional issues, 1472 00:47:28,041 --> 00:47:29,916 I've easily slept with thousands and thousands 1473 00:47:30,041 --> 00:47:31,208 and thousands of women. 1474 00:47:31,333 --> 00:47:32,666 You're welcome. 1475 00:47:32,791 --> 00:47:34,333 How many women have you slept with, Dad? 1476 00:47:34,458 --> 00:47:37,125 That's not your business. That's none of your business. 1477 00:47:37,250 --> 00:47:42,083 [music continues] 1478 00:47:42,208 --> 00:47:44,083 So you're my son, little man. 1479 00:47:46,458 --> 00:47:48,541 No wonder you're so handsome and awesome. 1480 00:47:48,666 --> 00:47:49,666 Hell yeah. 1481 00:47:49,791 --> 00:47:51,333 We're gonna make such a good team. 1482 00:47:51,458 --> 00:47:52,583 We're gonna have so much fun together. 1483 00:47:52,708 --> 00:47:54,000 Up high. [grunts] 1484 00:47:54,125 --> 00:47:55,666 [laughs] 1485 00:47:55,791 --> 00:47:56,833 Hey, Jeff. 1486 00:47:58,833 --> 00:48:00,333 - Hey, Gordon. - Yeah. 1487 00:48:00,458 --> 00:48:02,708 Can I talk to you for a second? 1488 00:48:02,833 --> 00:48:04,041 Look, um... 1489 00:48:06,208 --> 00:48:08,916 we need a favor. 1490 00:48:09,041 --> 00:48:10,291 These guys keep coming after us. 1491 00:48:10,416 --> 00:48:13,000 It's not safe for the kids. 1492 00:48:13,125 --> 00:48:15,166 Can we leave them here for a bit? 1493 00:48:15,291 --> 00:48:16,416 We're hoping you can look after them for a while 1494 00:48:16,541 --> 00:48:18,583 until we figure all this out. 1495 00:48:18,708 --> 00:48:20,875 [poignant music] 1496 00:48:21,000 --> 00:48:24,583 Yeah, um... 1497 00:48:24,708 --> 00:48:25,916 Will you help me, Dad? 1498 00:48:28,166 --> 00:48:30,958 I can't. Sorry... 1499 00:48:33,583 --> 00:48:37,041 I'm just not that... guy. 1500 00:48:38,458 --> 00:48:43,333 [music continues] 1501 00:48:47,875 --> 00:48:49,083 [door opens] 1502 00:48:58,041 --> 00:49:00,625 Oh, my God. 1503 00:49:03,541 --> 00:49:04,541 You okay? 1504 00:49:06,666 --> 00:49:09,416 Man, we gotta find out why they did this to you. 1505 00:49:09,541 --> 00:49:11,291 You know, why would anyone want a kid from me? 1506 00:49:14,541 --> 00:49:17,416 Why should I be a dad? 1507 00:49:17,541 --> 00:49:19,375 You saw mine. 1508 00:49:19,500 --> 00:49:21,041 That's why I enlisted. 1509 00:49:21,166 --> 00:49:22,750 You know, I had my own team. 1510 00:49:22,875 --> 00:49:24,875 Finally had a family. 1511 00:49:25,000 --> 00:49:26,416 And I couldn't even do that right. 1512 00:49:26,541 --> 00:49:27,750 [muffled explosion] 1513 00:49:27,875 --> 00:49:30,791 [muffled rapid gunfire] 1514 00:49:30,916 --> 00:49:34,416 - [soft music] - [shuddering breaths] 1515 00:49:34,541 --> 00:49:36,750 [teammate's voice] Sarge, what are you doing? 1516 00:49:36,875 --> 00:49:38,083 Take him out! 1517 00:49:39,541 --> 00:49:40,791 [Jeff's voice] I couldn't do it, 1518 00:49:40,916 --> 00:49:42,583 so they court-martialed me. 1519 00:49:42,708 --> 00:49:43,541 [gavel thuds, echoes] 1520 00:49:47,458 --> 00:49:50,541 You're still my perfect soldier, Jeff. 1521 00:49:50,666 --> 00:49:53,541 I wish I had more of you. 1522 00:49:53,666 --> 00:49:55,083 Perfect soldier, my ass. 1523 00:49:57,708 --> 00:49:59,333 That's not a flaw, man, at all. 1524 00:49:59,458 --> 00:50:01,541 I gotta be honest, it sounds like that colonel guy, 1525 00:50:01,666 --> 00:50:03,375 like he really liked you. 1526 00:50:03,500 --> 00:50:05,750 Yeah, Colonel Kurtz. 1527 00:50:05,875 --> 00:50:08,000 He always had my back. 1528 00:50:08,125 --> 00:50:09,625 That's what it's all about, see? 1529 00:50:11,625 --> 00:50:13,750 Letting them know that we have their backs. 1530 00:50:13,875 --> 00:50:15,666 [♪ Charlie Nguyen Kim: "Rolling Memories"] 1531 00:50:15,791 --> 00:50:17,458 ♪ I got it, you got it ♪ 1532 00:50:17,583 --> 00:50:19,500 ♪ Mm, they want it ♪ 1533 00:50:21,000 --> 00:50:21,916 [moans] 1534 00:50:24,708 --> 00:50:25,583 [both moan] 1535 00:50:25,708 --> 00:50:27,250 Wow, yeah. 1536 00:50:27,375 --> 00:50:28,541 He's definitely your son. 1537 00:50:29,833 --> 00:50:31,083 [both moan] 1538 00:50:38,583 --> 00:50:39,666 What are you doing? 1539 00:50:39,791 --> 00:50:41,541 Uh, nothing. I mean, we just... 1540 00:50:41,666 --> 00:50:42,625 It's kind of like we eat the same thing. 1541 00:50:42,750 --> 00:50:44,791 It's like, you know, just like when you... 1542 00:50:44,916 --> 00:50:47,041 You were eating [indistinct]. 1543 00:50:49,500 --> 00:50:52,083 We gotta figure out why they did this to you. 1544 00:50:52,208 --> 00:50:54,958 You don't know anyone in that top secret... 1545 00:50:55,083 --> 00:50:56,875 whatever? 1546 00:50:57,000 --> 00:50:58,250 [ping sound] 1547 00:51:00,416 --> 00:51:02,833 - Zach Galifianak-ish. - Whoa, whoa. 1548 00:51:02,958 --> 00:51:04,625 Easy, easy, easy. 1549 00:51:04,750 --> 00:51:05,750 I'm good. 1550 00:51:05,875 --> 00:51:06,875 [up-tempo music] 1551 00:51:07,000 --> 00:51:08,791 How in the world are we gonna find this guy? 1552 00:51:08,916 --> 00:51:10,125 We're gonna pretend to bang him. 1553 00:51:10,250 --> 00:51:11,333 What? 1554 00:51:14,083 --> 00:51:15,083 [car doors banging] 1555 00:51:16,250 --> 00:51:17,708 Zach couldn't get women 1556 00:51:17,833 --> 00:51:19,833 so he'd come to me to help him with all his dating apps. 1557 00:51:19,958 --> 00:51:21,458 Zach had no game. 1558 00:51:21,583 --> 00:51:23,250 - Obviously, I do. - Mm. 1559 00:51:23,375 --> 00:51:26,083 So I'd pretend to be him and text all these girls for him 1560 00:51:26,208 --> 00:51:27,625 and I was amazing at it. 1561 00:51:29,291 --> 00:51:30,250 Whoo-hoo! 1562 00:51:30,375 --> 00:51:31,791 Daddy's back in business. 1563 00:51:31,916 --> 00:51:33,416 Oh boy. 1564 00:51:33,541 --> 00:51:35,041 This is the one. 1565 00:51:35,166 --> 00:51:36,750 I can get this one. 1566 00:51:36,875 --> 00:51:37,958 Why is that? 1567 00:51:38,083 --> 00:51:40,750 Because she's half blind! 1568 00:51:40,875 --> 00:51:42,875 She can't even see me. 1569 00:51:43,000 --> 00:51:44,458 That's pretty sweet. 1570 00:51:44,583 --> 00:51:47,333 Dude, is that my body? 1571 00:51:47,458 --> 00:51:48,875 Yeah, yeah. I should have asked. 1572 00:51:49,000 --> 00:51:49,875 I got excited. 1573 00:51:50,000 --> 00:51:50,916 [ping sound] 1574 00:51:51,041 --> 00:51:52,000 [Jeff] And that's the plan. 1575 00:51:52,125 --> 00:51:54,125 We're gonna catfish this bag of shit. 1576 00:51:54,250 --> 00:51:55,416 We don't need to find him. 1577 00:51:55,541 --> 00:51:57,333 We're gonna bring him to us. 1578 00:51:57,458 --> 00:52:00,916 And our fake profile name will be... Candi. 1579 00:52:01,041 --> 00:52:01,916 [phone beeps] 1580 00:52:02,041 --> 00:52:03,041 Candi? 1581 00:52:03,166 --> 00:52:04,458 What, you want to call her Karen? 1582 00:52:04,583 --> 00:52:05,750 - I like Candi, Dad. - Would you just-- 1583 00:52:05,875 --> 00:52:09,500 Hey, just put your headphones on and stop listening. 1584 00:52:09,625 --> 00:52:10,750 You sit back. 1585 00:52:10,875 --> 00:52:12,083 Let a master do the work. 1586 00:52:12,208 --> 00:52:13,833 Okay. 1587 00:52:13,958 --> 00:52:17,541 Well, hello, handsome sailor. 1588 00:52:17,666 --> 00:52:19,708 [Siri's voice] Well, hello handsome sailor. 1589 00:52:19,833 --> 00:52:21,250 Ugh, here we go again. 1590 00:52:21,375 --> 00:52:23,958 [Siri's voice] I just got into town and you are hot. 1591 00:52:24,083 --> 00:52:28,041 Russian bots. Nice try, Putin. 1592 00:52:28,166 --> 00:52:30,000 Blocked. 1593 00:52:30,125 --> 00:52:31,041 [Siri's voice] This user has blocked you. 1594 00:52:31,166 --> 00:52:32,166 What? 1595 00:52:32,291 --> 00:52:33,166 All right, just give me the phone. 1596 00:52:33,291 --> 00:52:35,083 - Give it to me, all right? - Relax, Bri. 1597 00:52:35,208 --> 00:52:37,791 Look, maybe this time you just come in a little slower. 1598 00:52:37,916 --> 00:52:41,666 Listen, you wanna get smashed or what? 1599 00:52:41,791 --> 00:52:42,750 Ugh. 1600 00:52:42,875 --> 00:52:44,166 Report. 1601 00:52:44,291 --> 00:52:45,458 [Siri's voice] This user has reported you. 1602 00:52:45,583 --> 00:52:46,666 What is his problem? 1603 00:52:46,791 --> 00:52:48,041 Give me this thing. You're done. 1604 00:52:48,166 --> 00:52:49,250 What are you gonna do? 1605 00:52:49,375 --> 00:52:50,375 I'm telling you what I'm gonna do. 1606 00:52:50,500 --> 00:52:52,583 I'm gonna come in nice and slow, but steady. 1607 00:52:52,708 --> 00:52:53,666 [computer beeps] 1608 00:52:53,791 --> 00:52:55,000 [Siri's voice] Hi, I'm Emily. 1609 00:52:55,125 --> 00:52:56,583 Nice to meet you. 1610 00:52:56,708 --> 00:52:58,958 Oh, I'm on fire tonight. 1611 00:52:59,083 --> 00:53:01,583 I just read your profile. 1612 00:53:01,708 --> 00:53:05,958 I, too, am interested in... Pterodactyls, bulimia, 1613 00:53:06,083 --> 00:53:09,458 Love is Blind, and the Mormon culture. 1614 00:53:09,583 --> 00:53:11,000 Oh, this is so annoying. 1615 00:53:12,250 --> 00:53:15,125 Yes, it seems like we have much in common, 1616 00:53:17,416 --> 00:53:19,583 but now who's your favorite Mormon? 1617 00:53:19,708 --> 00:53:20,958 Favorite Mormon? 1618 00:53:21,083 --> 00:53:24,541 Favorite Mormon. Uh... 1619 00:53:24,666 --> 00:53:25,666 Top Gun Maverick. 1620 00:53:25,791 --> 00:53:27,041 Not even a person. 1621 00:53:27,166 --> 00:53:28,083 Jay-Z. 1622 00:53:28,208 --> 00:53:29,583 [computer beeps] 1623 00:53:29,708 --> 00:53:32,625 [Siri's voice] My favorite Mormon is, of course, Jay-Z. 1624 00:53:32,750 --> 00:53:34,083 Oh, she's the one. 1625 00:53:34,208 --> 00:53:38,708 It is so nice to talk with someone actually normal here. 1626 00:53:38,833 --> 00:53:43,625 I hate when people come across so disgusting and aggressive. 1627 00:53:43,750 --> 00:53:47,250 Get your grubby thoughts off of me, you know? 1628 00:53:47,375 --> 00:53:48,500 Totally. 1629 00:53:48,625 --> 00:53:50,416 So do you want to get smashed or not? 1630 00:53:50,541 --> 00:53:51,416 [notification beeps] 1631 00:53:51,541 --> 00:53:52,666 Yeah. 1632 00:53:52,791 --> 00:53:54,041 You see what I'm saying, Bri? 1633 00:53:56,416 --> 00:54:01,750 You want to know what really turns me on? 1634 00:54:01,875 --> 00:54:03,583 [whimsical music] 1635 00:54:03,708 --> 00:54:05,875 ♪ I'm just a boy ♪ 1636 00:54:06,000 --> 00:54:08,875 ♪ about to make love to a woman ♪ 1637 00:54:09,000 --> 00:54:13,291 ♪ about to make love to a woman ♪ 1638 00:54:13,416 --> 00:54:16,000 ♪ some call it intercourse ♪ 1639 00:54:17,791 --> 00:54:18,666 [scanner beeps] 1640 00:54:19,833 --> 00:54:21,833 - Oh, no. - Mm-hm. 1641 00:54:21,958 --> 00:54:23,333 Oh, not again. 1642 00:54:23,458 --> 00:54:25,416 - Sup, bitch? - Got you, fool. 1643 00:54:25,541 --> 00:54:27,416 Mmm, not going to jail. 1644 00:54:27,541 --> 00:54:28,375 Eat shit, [indistinct]. 1645 00:54:28,500 --> 00:54:29,583 [screams] 1646 00:54:30,666 --> 00:54:31,541 [sobs] 1647 00:54:31,666 --> 00:54:32,583 Okay. 1648 00:54:34,000 --> 00:54:37,750 You and I are gonna have a very calm conversation. 1649 00:54:40,333 --> 00:54:41,958 [shouts] What did you do to my son? 1650 00:54:42,083 --> 00:54:43,875 Dude, just please take the hood off. 1651 00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:45,583 I already know who you are, dumbass. 1652 00:54:45,708 --> 00:54:47,166 Oh, shit. Really? 1653 00:54:47,291 --> 00:54:48,291 Yeah, Jeff. 1654 00:54:48,416 --> 00:54:50,625 You're a pretty specific looking guy. 1655 00:54:50,750 --> 00:54:51,875 Damn it! 1656 00:54:52,000 --> 00:54:53,708 [grunting] 1657 00:54:55,083 --> 00:54:56,125 I want answers. 1658 00:54:56,250 --> 00:54:57,875 Now. 1659 00:54:58,000 --> 00:54:59,458 Start talking, bro. 1660 00:54:59,583 --> 00:55:00,833 Uh-uh. 1661 00:55:00,958 --> 00:55:02,583 Oh, you want to get waterboarded? 1662 00:55:02,708 --> 00:55:03,833 What? 1663 00:55:03,958 --> 00:55:05,208 You asked for it. 1664 00:55:05,333 --> 00:55:06,375 How are you gonna...? 1665 00:55:06,500 --> 00:55:07,791 [ice rattles] 1666 00:55:07,916 --> 00:55:09,416 That's not how you waterboard, Jeff. 1667 00:55:09,541 --> 00:55:10,708 That's right. 1668 00:55:10,833 --> 00:55:12,750 What are you, making me a protein shake? 1669 00:55:12,875 --> 00:55:14,916 Be prepared to talk, bitch. 1670 00:55:15,041 --> 00:55:18,208 - Not--Oh, come on. - Are you thirsty? 1671 00:55:18,333 --> 00:55:20,625 Yeah, how do you like them apples?! 1672 00:55:20,750 --> 00:55:21,791 Okay. 1673 00:55:21,916 --> 00:55:23,083 Can I talk to you for a second? 1674 00:55:23,208 --> 00:55:24,166 I was about to break him. 1675 00:55:24,291 --> 00:55:25,375 Get over here. 1676 00:55:27,166 --> 00:55:28,458 Ugh. 1677 00:55:29,875 --> 00:55:31,041 Yes, Mom? 1678 00:55:31,166 --> 00:55:33,791 Yeah, well, what's going on over here, 1679 00:55:33,916 --> 00:55:35,333 it's just not working, okay? 1680 00:55:35,458 --> 00:55:37,291 What? When I almost killed him? 1681 00:55:37,416 --> 00:55:38,875 You moisturized him is what you did. 1682 00:55:39,000 --> 00:55:40,500 Okay, so you're bad cop? 1683 00:55:40,625 --> 00:55:41,958 - I can be bad cop. - Okay. 1684 00:55:42,083 --> 00:55:43,333 - You can do it, Dad. - Yeah, I know. 1685 00:55:43,458 --> 00:55:45,250 - Go get it out of him. - I'll do it right now. 1686 00:55:45,375 --> 00:55:46,583 What are we gonna do? 1687 00:55:46,708 --> 00:55:47,916 What's that for? 1688 00:55:48,041 --> 00:55:49,208 Torture his ass. 1689 00:55:49,333 --> 00:55:50,250 [soft, quirky music] 1690 00:55:50,375 --> 00:55:52,833 Reservoir Dogs. 1691 00:55:52,958 --> 00:55:55,291 All right. Yeah, all right. 1692 00:55:55,416 --> 00:55:56,416 I can't wait to see this. 1693 00:55:56,541 --> 00:55:58,875 - Reservoir Dogs style. - Yeah. 1694 00:55:59,000 --> 00:56:00,875 [♪ Stealers Wheel: “Stuck in the Middle”] 1695 00:56:01,000 --> 00:56:02,375 Oh, God. 1696 00:56:02,500 --> 00:56:04,125 Who's laughing now, bitch? 1697 00:56:04,250 --> 00:56:08,000 ♪ Well, I don't know why I came here tonight ♪ 1698 00:56:08,125 --> 00:56:10,958 ♪ I got the feeling that Something ain't right ♪ 1699 00:56:11,083 --> 00:56:14,500 You look like Chris Christie is on Dancing with the Stars. 1700 00:56:16,083 --> 00:56:17,125 He's not--he's not scared. 1701 00:56:17,250 --> 00:56:18,458 - He's not afraid. - [Jeff] Don't be a quitter. 1702 00:56:18,583 --> 00:56:20,208 Get back in there. 1703 00:56:20,333 --> 00:56:21,208 Guess what? 1704 00:56:22,500 --> 00:56:25,208 Playtime is over. 1705 00:56:25,333 --> 00:56:29,166 [foreboding music] 1706 00:56:29,291 --> 00:56:30,291 Oh. 1707 00:56:35,458 --> 00:56:36,333 [music trails off] 1708 00:56:37,625 --> 00:56:39,916 That's like a traveling cosmetic kit. 1709 00:56:40,041 --> 00:56:41,083 You bet it is. 1710 00:56:41,208 --> 00:56:42,875 Pick your weapon, my friend. 1711 00:56:43,000 --> 00:56:44,458 Uh, the toothbrush? 1712 00:56:44,583 --> 00:56:45,708 Do you want this in you? 1713 00:56:45,833 --> 00:56:46,833 Man, what? 1714 00:56:46,958 --> 00:56:48,125 I'll start this way. I don't care. 1715 00:56:48,250 --> 00:56:49,666 Oh, my God, stab him already. 1716 00:56:49,791 --> 00:56:51,875 Look, the two boys over there 1717 00:56:52,000 --> 00:56:54,500 would probably do a better job interrogating me. 1718 00:56:54,625 --> 00:56:57,208 Why don't you swap places with them? 1719 00:56:58,541 --> 00:57:01,208 Hey, look at me. 1720 00:57:02,875 --> 00:57:06,541 You're making me look pathetic in front of my kid, okay? 1721 00:57:06,666 --> 00:57:08,500 I'm not gonna tell you anything, okay? 1722 00:57:08,625 --> 00:57:09,958 It doesn't matter what you offer me. 1723 00:57:10,083 --> 00:57:11,166 It doesn't matter what you do to me. 1724 00:57:11,291 --> 00:57:13,000 I'm not gonna tell you what happened. 1725 00:57:14,208 --> 00:57:15,250 Here's exactly what happened. 1726 00:57:15,375 --> 00:57:17,166 So, how do I put this? 1727 00:57:17,291 --> 00:57:21,083 That--that kid over there, that's--that's not your son. 1728 00:57:21,208 --> 00:57:23,125 Who somehow looks a lot like you 1729 00:57:23,250 --> 00:57:27,458 is because he is a genetic analog of you. 1730 00:57:27,583 --> 00:57:29,916 [Lucas] Genetic analog? 1731 00:57:30,041 --> 00:57:31,000 You mean like a clone? 1732 00:57:31,125 --> 00:57:32,541 Yeah. Smart kid. 1733 00:57:32,666 --> 00:57:34,458 Clone. 1734 00:57:34,583 --> 00:57:36,250 He's a genetic analog. A clone. 1735 00:57:36,375 --> 00:57:38,000 His name's CJ. 1736 00:57:38,125 --> 00:57:41,041 That literally means “Clone Jeff.” 1737 00:57:43,166 --> 00:57:46,041 [somber music] 1738 00:57:46,166 --> 00:57:48,458 So he's exactly like me? 1739 00:57:48,583 --> 00:57:51,083 Well, modified version of you. 1740 00:57:51,208 --> 00:57:54,291 See, he's faster, stronger, 1741 00:57:54,416 --> 00:57:57,916 and way smarter than you, okay. 1742 00:57:58,041 --> 00:57:59,333 He's a better version of you. 1743 00:57:59,458 --> 00:58:00,916 You are community college. 1744 00:58:01,041 --> 00:58:02,375 He is Harvard plus. 1745 00:58:03,875 --> 00:58:04,833 Why would you do this? 1746 00:58:04,958 --> 00:58:06,708 No, I didn't clone anyone. 1747 00:58:06,833 --> 00:58:08,458 I'm just like a babysitter. 1748 00:58:08,583 --> 00:58:09,541 [Brian] Then who did this? 1749 00:58:09,666 --> 00:58:11,541 I--I--I can't tell you. 1750 00:58:11,666 --> 00:58:13,625 All I got is a name and I'm not telling you 1751 00:58:13,750 --> 00:58:15,541 because they--ah, okay! 1752 00:58:15,666 --> 00:58:17,333 It's Simon Maddox. 1753 00:58:17,458 --> 00:58:18,416 Simon Maddox. 1754 00:58:18,541 --> 00:58:20,750 Put down the lamp. Simon Maddox. 1755 00:58:20,875 --> 00:58:22,250 Who the hell is Simon Maddox? 1756 00:58:22,375 --> 00:58:24,083 Oh, wow. 1757 00:58:24,208 --> 00:58:27,333 You guys have no idea what you just stepped into. 1758 00:58:29,666 --> 00:58:33,500 [soft, tense music] 1759 00:58:33,625 --> 00:58:35,541 [Brian] Okay. Who is Simon Maddox? 1760 00:58:37,666 --> 00:58:39,416 And why the hell would he clone Jeff? 1761 00:58:43,208 --> 00:58:46,791 [♪ Jay Ramsey: “Bayoue Belle”] 1762 00:58:46,916 --> 00:58:52,000 [both] Ergh. Aaagh! 1763 00:58:52,125 --> 00:58:53,875 Hah. 1764 00:58:54,000 --> 00:58:58,916 ♪ I used to sing and play the blues in a little old band ♪ 1765 00:58:59,041 --> 00:59:04,458 ♪ We got brave and we hit the road in a '61 van ♪ 1766 00:59:04,583 --> 00:59:06,125 Wow, this guy's a genius. 1767 00:59:08,708 --> 00:59:11,208 Oh man, super genius. 1768 00:59:11,333 --> 00:59:12,375 Mm, mm, mm! 1769 00:59:12,500 --> 00:59:13,958 Get that fight in there. Mm, mm, mm! 1770 00:59:14,083 --> 00:59:16,291 Oof. Okay. Also super creepy. 1771 00:59:17,583 --> 00:59:18,958 ♪ Fourteen dollars in the kitty ♪ 1772 00:59:19,083 --> 00:59:22,833 ♪ when we left Folger City and we headed down south ♪ 1773 00:59:22,958 --> 00:59:24,375 [both] Whoa. 1774 00:59:24,500 --> 00:59:28,541 You can read my mind? 1775 00:59:28,666 --> 00:59:32,583 Yes. Crazy. 1776 00:59:35,208 --> 00:59:39,125 ♪ I turned toward the swamp to look around ♪ 1777 00:59:39,250 --> 00:59:40,958 Hah! Hah! 1778 00:59:41,083 --> 00:59:43,208 ♪ Bayou Belle give your guitar heck ♪ 1779 00:59:43,333 --> 00:59:44,875 Wait, I got an idea. 1780 00:59:46,458 --> 00:59:49,083 Alexa, play some old-school hip-hop. 1781 00:59:49,208 --> 00:59:50,500 [♪ Ice Cube: “You Can Do It (Feat. Mack 10, Ms. Toi)"] 1782 00:59:50,625 --> 00:59:52,166 ♪ Ninety-nine, baby ♪ 1783 00:59:52,291 --> 00:59:53,833 ♪ I'm on the grind, baby ♪ 1784 00:59:55,000 --> 00:59:56,041 ♪ Show me something ♪ 1785 00:59:56,166 --> 00:59:58,291 ♪ You can do it put your back into it ♪ 1786 00:59:58,416 --> 00:59:59,791 ♪ I can do it put your into it... ♪ 1787 00:59:59,916 --> 01:00:01,583 Sick. 1788 01:00:01,708 --> 01:00:03,791 ♪ Tic-tic-boom, hear me banging down these back streets ♪ 1789 01:00:03,916 --> 01:00:06,166 ♪ Bumpin' Blackstreet treated like an athlete ♪ 1790 01:00:06,291 --> 01:00:07,875 ♪ we be clubbing till the day we die ♪ 1791 01:00:08,000 --> 01:00:09,708 ♪ ask the bartender if you think we lie... ♪ 1792 01:00:09,833 --> 01:00:11,041 [phone ringing] 1793 01:00:11,166 --> 01:00:12,625 [whispers] Crap. 1794 01:00:12,750 --> 01:00:15,666 Hey, Em, we're running a little bit late. 1795 01:00:15,791 --> 01:00:16,791 That's all, hon. 1796 01:00:16,916 --> 01:00:18,791 - [man breathes over phone] - Em? 1797 01:00:18,916 --> 01:00:20,375 ♪ You can do it put your back into it ♪ 1798 01:00:20,500 --> 01:00:22,166 Em? 1799 01:00:22,291 --> 01:00:25,083 [man's voice] [sighs] Look at your screen. 1800 01:00:25,208 --> 01:00:30,083 [foreboding music] 1801 01:00:32,541 --> 01:00:35,041 [man's voice] Would you like us to follow Emily home? 1802 01:00:35,166 --> 01:00:36,750 Pay her a little visit? 1803 01:00:36,875 --> 01:00:39,541 No. Would not like that. 1804 01:00:39,666 --> 01:00:42,083 [man's voice] Then you bring the boy to us. 1805 01:00:42,208 --> 01:00:44,958 Drive to the coordinates that we send to you. 1806 01:00:45,083 --> 01:00:48,208 Otherwise, we will visit your wife. 1807 01:00:48,333 --> 01:00:50,166 [screeches, phone beeping] 1808 01:00:56,041 --> 01:00:59,583 [gentle music] 1809 01:00:59,708 --> 01:01:01,958 [unsettling music] 1810 01:01:02,083 --> 01:01:03,208 [Jeff] You see, Bri-Bri? 1811 01:01:03,333 --> 01:01:04,791 How much fun are you having right now? 1812 01:01:04,916 --> 01:01:06,875 Whooh! God, you're good. 1813 01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:09,083 So how'd you track down this Simon Maddox? 1814 01:01:09,208 --> 01:01:11,000 You do your forensic accounting? 1815 01:01:11,125 --> 01:01:12,041 Hm. 1816 01:01:12,166 --> 01:01:13,833 [Lucas giggles] 1817 01:01:13,958 --> 01:01:16,125 Bri-Bri? You okay? 1818 01:01:16,250 --> 01:01:18,500 Oh, yeah, yeah. 1819 01:01:18,625 --> 01:01:19,541 Okay. 1820 01:01:22,541 --> 01:01:24,500 Man, it's finally happening. 1821 01:01:24,625 --> 01:01:26,625 CJ and I are finally connecting. 1822 01:01:26,750 --> 01:01:28,541 Isn't this incredible? 1823 01:01:28,666 --> 01:01:30,625 It is, yeah. 1824 01:01:30,750 --> 01:01:35,250 Hey, I gotta thank you for that little talk earlier. 1825 01:01:35,375 --> 01:01:37,000 I think you're right. 1826 01:01:37,125 --> 01:01:38,666 I really am gonna be the best dad. 1827 01:01:42,416 --> 01:01:43,625 - [woman screams] - [man 2's voice] He's got a gun! 1828 01:01:43,750 --> 01:01:45,000 [man 3's voice] Oh, my God! They're gonna kill her! 1829 01:01:45,125 --> 01:01:46,083 [Jeff] So how much further, Bri-Bri? 1830 01:01:46,208 --> 01:01:47,083 [dramatic thud] [scream echoes] 1831 01:01:48,583 --> 01:01:50,375 No, no, not--not much. 1832 01:01:50,500 --> 01:01:53,333 Man, I can't wait to see this ass-hat face-to-face. 1833 01:01:53,458 --> 01:01:54,333 Right, CJ? 1834 01:01:54,458 --> 01:01:55,375 Right. 1835 01:01:56,500 --> 01:01:57,583 [Lucas giggling] 1836 01:01:57,708 --> 01:02:02,625 [tense music] 1837 01:02:11,166 --> 01:02:13,833 [car rumbling, stops] 1838 01:02:17,000 --> 01:02:18,458 [car doors banging] 1839 01:02:18,583 --> 01:02:20,041 [Jeff] Huh, this can't be right. 1840 01:02:20,166 --> 01:02:22,458 Pictured it more of like an Area 51 type place. 1841 01:02:24,291 --> 01:02:26,375 Maybe you did your forensicing wrong. 1842 01:02:27,541 --> 01:02:33,416 [car revving] 1843 01:02:33,541 --> 01:02:36,375 - Lucas, get in the van. - Why? 1844 01:02:36,500 --> 01:02:37,833 [Brian] Get in the van right now, please. 1845 01:02:39,250 --> 01:02:42,208 Bri? What's going on? 1846 01:02:42,333 --> 01:02:44,375 [suspenseful music] 1847 01:02:44,500 --> 01:02:46,416 Jeff, I'm so sorry. 1848 01:02:46,541 --> 01:02:47,458 For what? 1849 01:02:47,583 --> 01:02:48,500 [gunman] Get down! 1850 01:02:48,625 --> 01:02:50,083 [gunman] Freeze! Don't you move! 1851 01:02:51,958 --> 01:02:54,333 Dude, they were coming after Emily, all right? 1852 01:02:54,458 --> 01:02:56,958 They were firing guns and--and everything, man. 1853 01:02:57,083 --> 01:02:59,333 I--I--I didn't know what to do. 1854 01:02:59,458 --> 01:03:04,291 [♪ Pretti Emage: “Earthquake”] 1855 01:03:04,416 --> 01:03:05,416 ♪ Shake that, shake that ♪ 1856 01:03:05,541 --> 01:03:06,916 ♪ Shake that, shake that go at best ♪ 1857 01:03:07,041 --> 01:03:07,958 ♪ Shake that, shake that ♪ 1858 01:03:08,083 --> 01:03:08,958 ♪ Make it jiggle make it jiggle ♪ 1859 01:03:09,083 --> 01:03:10,333 ♪ Do a jump, split ♪ 1860 01:03:10,458 --> 01:03:11,458 ♪ Make it wiggle Make it wiggle ♪ 1861 01:03:11,583 --> 01:03:12,458 ♪ Make that, make that ♪ 1862 01:03:12,583 --> 01:03:13,416 ♪ Wanna shake it? ♪ 1863 01:03:13,541 --> 01:03:14,541 ♪ Wanna... ♪ 1864 01:03:17,000 --> 01:03:18,750 Who the hell are you? 1865 01:03:18,875 --> 01:03:22,250 Oh, you already know my name. 1866 01:03:22,375 --> 01:03:25,208 What's that? Captain Dickface? 1867 01:03:25,333 --> 01:03:27,291 No. 1868 01:03:27,416 --> 01:03:29,166 This is Simon Maddox. 1869 01:03:32,375 --> 01:03:33,875 [dramatic music] 1870 01:03:34,000 --> 01:03:35,458 Hey, you touch him and I'll kill you! 1871 01:03:37,500 --> 01:03:38,583 Don't touch him! 1872 01:03:44,083 --> 01:03:45,416 Why are you doing this? 1873 01:03:45,541 --> 01:03:47,041 Why are you doing this anyway? 1874 01:03:48,291 --> 01:03:49,708 He's just a kid. 1875 01:03:49,833 --> 01:03:53,416 He is not just a kid. 1876 01:03:53,541 --> 01:03:54,708 Why me? 1877 01:03:56,333 --> 01:03:57,541 Why'd you do this to me? 1878 01:04:00,250 --> 01:04:01,833 I'm not the one who can answer that. 1879 01:04:04,000 --> 01:04:05,000 Come on, CJ. 1880 01:04:05,125 --> 01:04:06,291 - Wait, hold on. - [automatic rifle cocks] 1881 01:04:06,416 --> 01:04:07,708 Hold on. 1882 01:04:08,916 --> 01:04:11,000 Let me at least say goodbye to him. 1883 01:04:11,125 --> 01:04:13,083 Trust me, this is harder for you than it is for him. 1884 01:04:15,250 --> 01:04:19,250 CJ isn't capable of making any emotional connections. 1885 01:04:19,375 --> 01:04:22,708 It's literally not in his DNA. 1886 01:04:22,833 --> 01:04:24,041 Well, that's bullshit. 1887 01:04:25,375 --> 01:04:26,333 I'll prove it. 1888 01:04:31,500 --> 01:04:32,500 Hey. 1889 01:04:35,083 --> 01:04:36,916 I love you, little man. 1890 01:04:37,041 --> 01:04:39,791 And I know you love me, too. 1891 01:04:39,916 --> 01:04:41,958 I don't know what you mean. 1892 01:04:42,083 --> 01:04:43,583 What does love mean? 1893 01:04:45,416 --> 01:04:46,958 It's in your heart. 1894 01:04:49,500 --> 01:04:51,833 Don't you feel anything in your heart? 1895 01:04:51,958 --> 01:04:53,083 No? 1896 01:04:55,916 --> 01:04:58,958 Do you feel anything at all? 1897 01:04:59,083 --> 01:05:00,250 No. 1898 01:05:04,708 --> 01:05:06,125 I don't believe that. 1899 01:05:07,291 --> 01:05:10,250 So this isn't goodbye, okay? 1900 01:05:10,375 --> 01:05:11,791 I'll see you again real soon. 1901 01:05:14,416 --> 01:05:15,666 Up high. 1902 01:05:19,666 --> 01:05:20,875 Ah, come on. 1903 01:05:22,708 --> 01:05:23,666 Don't leave me hanging, dude. 1904 01:05:23,791 --> 01:05:24,875 Not now. 1905 01:05:27,000 --> 01:05:28,083 Please. 1906 01:05:32,000 --> 01:05:33,083 [Lucas] CJ! 1907 01:05:34,666 --> 01:05:36,000 Lu--Lucas. 1908 01:05:44,750 --> 01:05:46,916 [rhythmic drum beating] 1909 01:05:47,041 --> 01:05:48,041 Lucas, let's go. 1910 01:05:48,166 --> 01:05:53,166 [poignant music] 1911 01:05:53,291 --> 01:05:54,833 [indistinct radio chatter] 1912 01:05:57,000 --> 01:06:01,458 [cars revving] 1913 01:06:01,583 --> 01:06:02,458 [dramatic strings] 1914 01:06:04,708 --> 01:06:06,125 Lucas, get in the van. 1915 01:06:07,208 --> 01:06:11,083 [tense music] 1916 01:06:15,541 --> 01:06:19,750 [gentle music] 1917 01:06:19,875 --> 01:06:21,000 ♪ This is the rhythm of the night ♪ 1918 01:06:21,125 --> 01:06:23,166 [laughs] How do you like me now? 1919 01:06:23,291 --> 01:06:25,083 Ooh! Ooh! 1920 01:06:33,541 --> 01:06:36,083 Oh, did I get him? 1921 01:06:36,208 --> 01:06:38,500 Did... did I look cool? 1922 01:06:38,625 --> 01:06:40,083 No. 1923 01:06:40,208 --> 01:06:44,833 But you distracted him, and then Jeff took him out. 1924 01:06:44,958 --> 01:06:46,916 Oh. 1925 01:06:47,041 --> 01:06:50,666 Hey, Lucas, I'm sorry. 1926 01:06:50,791 --> 01:06:52,666 Look, I'm just... 1927 01:06:52,791 --> 01:06:58,000 I just may not be the dad you... you need or you... 1928 01:06:58,125 --> 01:06:59,875 I mean, the one you really want. 1929 01:07:00,000 --> 01:07:01,166 What do you mean? 1930 01:07:01,291 --> 01:07:02,375 I'm not young. 1931 01:07:03,541 --> 01:07:04,541 You know, I'm not badass. 1932 01:07:04,666 --> 01:07:06,416 I'm just not a... 1933 01:07:06,541 --> 01:07:09,125 You are my dad. 1934 01:07:09,250 --> 01:07:11,083 I don't want you to change at all. 1935 01:07:13,041 --> 01:07:13,875 You don't? 1936 01:07:14,000 --> 01:07:14,958 No. 1937 01:07:16,333 --> 01:07:20,583 I have you, right? 1938 01:07:20,708 --> 01:07:21,916 Right. 1939 01:07:29,041 --> 01:07:31,583 Hey, Jeff, should I tie him up and torture his ass 1940 01:07:31,708 --> 01:07:33,083 like we did with the fat leprechaun? 1941 01:07:33,208 --> 01:07:34,333 Would you? 1942 01:07:34,458 --> 01:07:35,500 I need a moment to recover 1943 01:07:35,625 --> 01:07:38,041 from your dad's gut-wrenching betrayal. 1944 01:07:38,166 --> 01:07:40,500 I'm--I'm really sorry, all right? 1945 01:07:40,625 --> 01:07:42,083 Doesn't matter. 1946 01:07:42,208 --> 01:07:43,125 I failed. 1947 01:07:43,250 --> 01:07:44,791 You--you didn't fail him. 1948 01:07:44,916 --> 01:07:45,958 We gotta go get him. 1949 01:07:46,083 --> 01:07:48,125 Didn't you hear what he said? 1950 01:07:48,250 --> 01:07:49,250 He doesn't care about me. 1951 01:07:49,375 --> 01:07:51,000 Okay, so that's it. 1952 01:07:51,125 --> 01:07:53,000 After all we've been through? 1953 01:07:53,125 --> 01:07:54,208 Whatever. 1954 01:07:54,333 --> 01:07:55,458 He doesn't want me to come get him. 1955 01:07:55,583 --> 01:07:58,041 Of course he wants you to come. 1956 01:07:58,166 --> 01:07:59,833 Listen to me. Hey! Listen to me! 1957 01:07:59,958 --> 01:08:02,208 You're not your dad. Okay? 1958 01:08:02,333 --> 01:08:03,166 You know how I know this? 1959 01:08:05,333 --> 01:08:08,416 I know you got heart. 1960 01:08:08,541 --> 01:08:09,833 Careful, Bri. 1961 01:08:11,166 --> 01:08:12,375 You're starting to talk like we're best friends. 1962 01:08:12,500 --> 01:08:14,083 Nah, closer but... 1963 01:08:14,208 --> 01:08:15,583 [phone beeps, vibrating] 1964 01:08:15,708 --> 01:08:16,625 [feet thumps] 1965 01:08:19,875 --> 01:08:21,000 [tense music] 1966 01:08:21,125 --> 01:08:22,291 [phone beeping] 1967 01:08:24,000 --> 01:08:25,125 It's your phone. 1968 01:08:26,583 --> 01:08:28,708 Lucas, w--where's the tracker? 1969 01:08:28,833 --> 01:08:31,083 Well, it's in my hood-- 1970 01:08:31,208 --> 01:08:32,208 CJ has it. 1971 01:08:32,333 --> 01:08:33,166 I thought you shut it off? 1972 01:08:33,291 --> 01:08:35,041 I did. 1973 01:08:35,166 --> 01:08:36,458 You know what this means? 1974 01:08:36,583 --> 01:08:38,166 - What? - Why don't you tell him, Luke? 1975 01:08:38,291 --> 01:08:39,625 It means he turned the tracker on 1976 01:08:39,750 --> 01:08:41,125 because he wants you to go save him. 1977 01:08:42,333 --> 01:08:43,750 How do we know that's what he wants? 1978 01:08:43,875 --> 01:08:45,083 Because you're his dad. 1979 01:08:47,500 --> 01:08:48,375 Damn right, I am. 1980 01:08:48,500 --> 01:08:52,291 [intense music] 1981 01:08:52,416 --> 01:08:55,208 [phone beeping rapidly] 1982 01:08:57,250 --> 01:09:00,750 [foreboding music] 1983 01:09:07,541 --> 01:09:08,791 Oh, this is where you worked? 1984 01:09:08,916 --> 01:09:10,583 - [Jeff] Mm-hm. - [Brian] It's like a lab. 1985 01:09:10,708 --> 01:09:12,000 Why would they bring him back here? 1986 01:09:12,125 --> 01:09:13,625 This guy's a freaking nerd. 1987 01:09:13,750 --> 01:09:17,541 [insects chirping] 1988 01:09:17,666 --> 01:09:18,708 [car doors banging] 1989 01:09:21,500 --> 01:09:23,208 Lucas, I need you to stay in the van 1990 01:09:23,333 --> 01:09:25,500 and lock the door, okay? 1991 01:09:25,625 --> 01:09:27,833 Lucas, I want to keep you safe, all right? 1992 01:09:27,958 --> 01:09:30,166 That's the most important thing to me, okay? 1993 01:09:30,291 --> 01:09:34,583 Okay, but you're gonna come back, though, right? 1994 01:09:34,708 --> 01:09:36,208 Of course we're coming back. 1995 01:09:36,333 --> 01:09:37,541 Right, Jeff? 1996 01:09:37,666 --> 01:09:38,750 Both of us? 1997 01:09:39,833 --> 01:09:41,833 Sure. 1998 01:09:41,958 --> 01:09:43,125 Let's do this. 1999 01:09:43,250 --> 01:09:46,708 [dramatic action music] 2000 01:09:46,833 --> 01:09:50,250 [fence clanking] 2001 01:09:50,375 --> 01:09:51,250 [button beeping] 2002 01:09:51,375 --> 01:09:52,291 [Brian] Oh. 2003 01:09:52,416 --> 01:09:53,625 [gate hinges creak] 2004 01:09:53,750 --> 01:09:54,708 Really? 2005 01:09:54,833 --> 01:09:56,125 Quit screwing around. 2006 01:10:03,458 --> 01:10:05,416 Hey, why--why is the door open? 2007 01:10:05,541 --> 01:10:07,375 It's like they're expecting us. 2008 01:10:07,500 --> 01:10:11,708 [phone beeping] 2009 01:10:24,041 --> 01:10:25,791 [phone beeping] 2010 01:10:25,916 --> 01:10:27,625 [rapid beeping, static] 2011 01:10:35,625 --> 01:10:37,625 I don't know. What are you doing? 2012 01:10:37,750 --> 01:10:38,666 Split up and cover more ground. 2013 01:10:38,791 --> 01:10:39,791 You gotta say that to me, okay? 2014 01:10:39,916 --> 01:10:41,333 That's what I just said. I was-- 2015 01:10:41,458 --> 01:10:42,333 You didn't. [indistinct] with your freaking hands. 2016 01:10:42,458 --> 01:10:44,041 - I did not-- - Stop with the hands. 2017 01:10:49,000 --> 01:10:52,875 [suspenseful music] 2018 01:10:54,500 --> 01:10:55,708 [dramatic strings] 2019 01:11:03,625 --> 01:11:08,458 [suspenseful music continues] 2020 01:11:12,500 --> 01:11:13,583 [dramatic thud] 2021 01:11:16,333 --> 01:11:17,958 - Oh, my God! - Hi. 2022 01:11:18,083 --> 01:11:21,083 CJ, you scared the crap out of me. 2023 01:11:21,208 --> 01:11:22,458 That's a weird outfit. 2024 01:11:22,583 --> 01:11:24,958 Well, that's easier than I thought. 2025 01:11:25,083 --> 01:11:27,041 Let's call your dad. 2026 01:11:27,166 --> 01:11:29,291 - [Jeff] Hey, what's up? - Found CJ, huh? 2027 01:11:29,416 --> 01:11:31,125 How about that, huh? 2028 01:11:31,250 --> 01:11:32,291 - [Jeff] How's that possible? - What are you talking about? 2029 01:11:32,416 --> 01:11:35,250 What, you think you're the only one that could be the, uh... 2030 01:11:35,375 --> 01:11:36,541 hero? 2031 01:11:36,666 --> 01:11:38,375 [dramatic strings] 2032 01:11:39,541 --> 01:11:42,125 Wait, there's two CJs? 2033 01:11:42,250 --> 01:11:43,166 [Brian] This is insane. 2034 01:11:45,000 --> 01:11:46,750 Which one's ours? 2035 01:11:46,875 --> 01:11:48,208 I don't know. 2036 01:11:50,458 --> 01:11:51,791 Hey, little dudes. 2037 01:11:51,916 --> 01:11:53,916 Which one of you two is my little guy? 2038 01:11:55,625 --> 01:11:57,416 Whoa, whoa, hey! Guys! Guys! 2039 01:11:57,541 --> 01:12:00,166 Hey, chill! 2040 01:12:00,291 --> 01:12:01,250 Bitch! 2041 01:12:01,375 --> 01:12:03,041 [upbeat music] 2042 01:12:03,166 --> 01:12:04,166 [screaming] 2043 01:12:08,416 --> 01:12:10,125 [strains] 2044 01:12:10,250 --> 01:12:12,125 [groans] 2045 01:12:12,250 --> 01:12:13,375 That was a little excessive, huh? 2046 01:12:13,500 --> 01:12:15,000 It was self-defense! 2047 01:12:16,250 --> 01:12:17,125 [dramatic strings] 2048 01:12:18,666 --> 01:12:19,625 What are they, possessed? 2049 01:12:19,750 --> 01:12:20,916 No, no, I'm not... 2050 01:12:21,041 --> 01:12:22,125 I don't like where this is going. 2051 01:12:22,250 --> 01:12:23,791 I'm out. 2052 01:12:23,916 --> 01:12:25,125 Oh, gosh. 2053 01:12:25,250 --> 01:12:26,708 [security alarm blaring] 2054 01:12:26,833 --> 01:12:27,958 What the hell. 2055 01:12:30,041 --> 01:12:33,083 [Jeff] Oh, come on. 2056 01:12:33,208 --> 01:12:34,208 [clone CJs growl] 2057 01:12:34,333 --> 01:12:35,791 - Okay. - Nope. 2058 01:12:36,958 --> 01:12:41,208 No. No. No. 2059 01:12:42,958 --> 01:12:44,083 [rope whooshes] 2060 01:12:45,416 --> 01:12:47,458 What the hell is going on here? 2061 01:12:47,583 --> 01:12:48,958 All right, everyone needs to just relax. 2062 01:12:49,083 --> 01:12:51,708 - No, no, no, no, no, no. - Relax! Relax. 2063 01:12:51,833 --> 01:12:53,125 No, no, no, no, no, no, no! 2064 01:12:53,250 --> 01:12:54,250 Go, go, go, go! 2065 01:12:54,375 --> 01:12:56,750 [CJs screaming] 2066 01:12:57,875 --> 01:12:59,708 - No! - Sorry. 2067 01:12:59,833 --> 01:13:01,750 Ah, you gotta help me! 2068 01:13:01,875 --> 01:13:03,291 - Sorry. - He's biting me. 2069 01:13:04,791 --> 01:13:06,458 Jeff, I can't see. Get him off! 2070 01:13:06,583 --> 01:13:07,541 [strains] 2071 01:13:07,666 --> 01:13:08,750 - [groans] - I'm so sorry. 2072 01:13:08,875 --> 01:13:10,416 Why are you apologizing? 2073 01:13:10,541 --> 01:13:12,375 For beating the shit out of little versions of me. 2074 01:13:13,666 --> 01:13:15,083 I have no one to talk to about it. 2075 01:13:15,208 --> 01:13:16,583 Stop it! Stop it! I don't like that. 2076 01:13:16,708 --> 01:13:18,291 Just punch him and apologize. 2077 01:13:19,458 --> 01:13:22,666 I'm so sorry. I'm very sorry. 2078 01:13:22,791 --> 01:13:23,791 Oh, God. 2079 01:13:25,708 --> 01:13:28,166 [dramatic music] 2080 01:13:28,291 --> 01:13:30,166 I can't believe they cloned that many. 2081 01:13:30,291 --> 01:13:31,541 What assholes. 2082 01:13:31,666 --> 01:13:32,541 There's a lot of them. 2083 01:13:32,666 --> 01:13:37,041 [distant loud thudding] 2084 01:13:37,166 --> 01:13:39,000 You, uh... 2085 01:13:39,125 --> 01:13:40,166 You hear that? 2086 01:13:40,291 --> 01:13:41,708 Yeah. 2087 01:13:41,833 --> 01:13:42,916 What is that? 2088 01:13:43,041 --> 01:13:45,250 I don't know. 2089 01:13:45,375 --> 01:13:46,458 A T-rex? 2090 01:13:52,041 --> 01:13:53,583 - [loud thud] - [glass clanks] 2091 01:13:54,916 --> 01:13:59,500 - [suspenseful music] - [loud thudding] 2092 01:14:05,083 --> 01:14:06,750 [clone CJs screaming] 2093 01:14:06,875 --> 01:14:07,958 [♪ “Ride of the Valkyries (from Die Walküre, Act III)”] 2094 01:14:08,083 --> 01:14:11,250 Oh... Oh... Oh, my God! 2095 01:14:11,375 --> 01:14:13,500 [clone CJ] Get some! Get some! 2096 01:14:15,750 --> 01:14:17,041 [♪ “Ride of the Valkyries (from Die Walküre, Act III)”] 2097 01:14:17,166 --> 01:14:19,208 Oh, shit. 2098 01:14:19,333 --> 01:14:23,125 [indistinct] 2099 01:14:23,250 --> 01:14:27,333 [♪ “Ride of the Valkyries (from Die Walküre, Act III)”] 2100 01:14:30,041 --> 01:14:31,375 No, no, no, no! 2101 01:14:31,500 --> 01:14:33,083 [panting] 2102 01:14:35,041 --> 01:14:39,125 [distant clatter, explosion] 2103 01:14:40,333 --> 01:14:41,750 [distant screaming] 2104 01:14:41,875 --> 01:14:44,041 [electricity crackling] 2105 01:14:44,166 --> 01:14:46,541 [gentle, quirky music] 2106 01:14:46,666 --> 01:14:48,166 Thelma and Louise? 2107 01:14:50,416 --> 01:14:51,416 We have to hold hands? 2108 01:14:51,541 --> 01:14:53,375 Yeah, we gotta hold hands. 2109 01:14:59,083 --> 01:15:03,958 [gentle uplifting music] 2110 01:15:08,291 --> 01:15:09,416 What the hell. 2111 01:15:12,875 --> 01:15:15,541 [clattering] 2112 01:15:15,666 --> 01:15:18,166 [distant screaming] 2113 01:15:19,541 --> 01:15:22,250 [screaming] 2114 01:15:22,375 --> 01:15:24,833 [invisible wall crackling] 2115 01:15:26,250 --> 01:15:28,416 [clones groaning] 2116 01:15:29,875 --> 01:15:31,750 It's like they got dog collars on, look at... 2117 01:15:31,875 --> 01:15:33,333 Look at them. 2118 01:15:33,458 --> 01:15:36,041 It's an electric fence. They can't get past here. 2119 01:15:36,166 --> 01:15:38,208 It's incredible. 2120 01:15:38,333 --> 01:15:40,458 - [laughing] - Yes! 2121 01:15:42,375 --> 01:15:44,166 Idiots! What's up now? 2122 01:15:44,291 --> 01:15:45,375 - Yeah, now! - What's up now? 2123 01:15:45,500 --> 01:15:46,666 [Brian] What's up now? 2124 01:15:46,791 --> 01:15:49,416 - Suck it! - Yeah! That's what he said! 2125 01:15:49,541 --> 01:15:51,250 [gun thuds, cocks] 2126 01:15:51,375 --> 01:15:53,166 Okay, okay. 2127 01:15:55,666 --> 01:15:56,833 Hey, Bri. 2128 01:15:56,958 --> 01:15:58,125 Remember what Jenny said to Forrest 2129 01:15:58,250 --> 01:15:59,166 when he was gimping around 2130 01:15:59,291 --> 01:16:01,833 with those metal things on his legs? 2131 01:16:01,958 --> 01:16:03,083 No. 2132 01:16:04,333 --> 01:16:05,666 [masked man grunts] 2133 01:16:05,791 --> 01:16:07,708 Run, Forrest! Run! 2134 01:16:07,833 --> 01:16:09,041 [gunshot] 2135 01:16:10,666 --> 01:16:11,541 [door bangs] 2136 01:16:11,666 --> 01:16:12,625 God. 2137 01:16:14,625 --> 01:16:15,666 Ugh. 2138 01:16:15,791 --> 01:16:17,583 ‘Sup dawg? 2139 01:16:21,125 --> 01:16:22,333 Hello, Jeff. 2140 01:16:24,541 --> 01:16:26,875 Lucas! Lucas! 2141 01:16:27,000 --> 01:16:28,041 - We gotta go! - Dad! 2142 01:16:28,166 --> 01:16:30,208 - We gotta go! - Wh--what's happening? 2143 01:16:30,333 --> 01:16:31,333 Where's Jeff? 2144 01:16:33,083 --> 01:16:35,041 Colonel? 2145 01:16:35,166 --> 01:16:36,750 What are you doing with this freakin' nerd? 2146 01:16:36,875 --> 01:16:37,916 Why don't you just shut your face, you loser. 2147 01:16:38,041 --> 01:16:39,250 I own a Bugatti, okay? 2148 01:16:39,375 --> 01:16:41,000 I get tons of hot chicks now. 2149 01:16:41,125 --> 01:16:43,750 I see you two have become pals. 2150 01:16:43,875 --> 01:16:45,583 What the hell's going on here? 2151 01:16:45,708 --> 01:16:49,750 Well, after all you've done for us, Jeff, 2152 01:16:49,875 --> 01:16:51,166 you deserve some answers now. 2153 01:16:51,291 --> 01:16:53,916 Yeah. Why'd you do this to me? 2154 01:16:54,041 --> 01:16:57,458 Because you were my perfect soldier. 2155 01:16:57,583 --> 01:17:00,166 A true physical specimen. 2156 01:17:00,291 --> 01:17:04,666 But do you know what your kryptonite is? 2157 01:17:04,791 --> 01:17:06,166 Gefilte fish? 2158 01:17:06,291 --> 01:17:10,125 You have too much... empathy. 2159 01:17:10,250 --> 01:17:11,500 [doorbell rings, opens] 2160 01:17:11,625 --> 01:17:14,708 [somber music] 2161 01:17:14,833 --> 01:17:18,500 CJ. You okay? 2162 01:17:20,958 --> 01:17:23,541 See, son, you weren't the only soldier 2163 01:17:23,666 --> 01:17:27,583 to let your country down in the field. 2164 01:17:27,708 --> 01:17:29,041 Soldiers get tired. 2165 01:17:30,625 --> 01:17:34,666 They get afraid and start to have feelings. 2166 01:17:34,791 --> 01:17:38,833 Well, I needed to fix that problem. 2167 01:17:38,958 --> 01:17:42,416 So when I stumbled upon Simon's genius here... 2168 01:17:42,541 --> 01:17:44,250 Genius, bitch. 2169 01:17:44,375 --> 01:17:49,208 Even Simon didn't realize what his technology could create. 2170 01:17:49,333 --> 01:17:53,000 It could create the perfect genetic soldier. 2171 01:17:53,125 --> 01:17:57,791 All we needed was your superior DNA. 2172 01:17:57,916 --> 01:17:59,666 Random drug tests. 2173 01:17:59,791 --> 01:18:02,500 You were our ideal candidate, Jeff. 2174 01:18:02,625 --> 01:18:05,500 So you're telling me all those little guys out there 2175 01:18:05,625 --> 01:18:08,833 are going to be super soldiers? 2176 01:18:10,583 --> 01:18:15,083 Each one designed to never get tired. 2177 01:18:15,208 --> 01:18:17,583 And now for one final test. 2178 01:18:20,291 --> 01:18:21,750 [somber music] 2179 01:18:21,875 --> 01:18:24,125 Go ahead, CJ. 2180 01:18:24,250 --> 01:18:26,041 Do what you were trained to do. 2181 01:18:27,958 --> 01:18:31,291 Sergeant Eamon, thank you for your service. 2182 01:18:31,416 --> 01:18:32,291 [crossbow clanks] 2183 01:18:38,083 --> 01:18:40,458 CJ...listen, man. 2184 01:18:42,000 --> 01:18:44,458 Yeah, I... 2185 01:18:44,583 --> 01:18:46,791 you're not a machine. 2186 01:18:46,916 --> 01:18:49,625 You know how I know that? 2187 01:18:49,750 --> 01:18:51,791 Because if we're the same, 2188 01:18:51,916 --> 01:18:53,916 it means we got the same heart. 2189 01:18:55,541 --> 01:18:58,083 [soft, tense music swells, fades] 2190 01:18:59,375 --> 01:19:02,583 [dramatic music] 2191 01:19:02,708 --> 01:19:04,291 [Maddox] [slow motion] Fuck! 2192 01:19:04,416 --> 01:19:06,250 [dramatic choral] 2193 01:19:06,375 --> 01:19:07,250 [groans] 2194 01:19:07,375 --> 01:19:08,458 [body thumps] 2195 01:19:08,583 --> 01:19:10,750 [soldiers screaming] 2196 01:19:10,875 --> 01:19:13,416 [♪ KC & The Sunshine Band: “Give It Up”] 2197 01:19:13,541 --> 01:19:16,583 ♪ Everybody wants you ♪ 2198 01:19:16,708 --> 01:19:20,458 ♪ Everybody wants your love ♪ 2199 01:19:20,583 --> 01:19:23,208 ♪ I'd just like to make you mine... ♪ 2200 01:19:23,333 --> 01:19:24,250 [strains] 2201 01:19:25,458 --> 01:19:26,500 [CJ strains] 2202 01:19:26,625 --> 01:19:28,083 [screams] 2203 01:19:28,208 --> 01:19:30,625 ♪ Na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na-na-na now ♪ 2204 01:19:30,750 --> 01:19:32,166 ♪ Baby, give it up ♪ 2205 01:19:32,291 --> 01:19:33,291 ♪ Give it up ♪ 2206 01:19:33,416 --> 01:19:35,833 ♪ Baby, give it up ♪ 2207 01:19:35,958 --> 01:19:38,166 ♪ Na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na-na-na now ♪ 2208 01:19:38,291 --> 01:19:40,000 - [ping sound] - ♪ Baby, give it up ♪ 2209 01:19:40,125 --> 01:19:41,250 ♪ Give it up ♪ 2210 01:19:41,375 --> 01:19:43,125 ♪ Baby, give it up ♪ 2211 01:19:49,375 --> 01:19:51,125 [body thumps] 2212 01:19:51,250 --> 01:19:54,958 - [ping sound] - ♪ Everybody sees you ♪ 2213 01:19:55,083 --> 01:19:57,916 ♪ Everybody looks and stares ♪ 2214 01:19:58,041 --> 01:20:01,500 [soft, dramatic music] 2215 01:20:01,625 --> 01:20:03,625 ♪ Na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na-na-na now ♪ 2216 01:20:03,750 --> 01:20:05,041 ♪ Baby, give it up ♪ 2217 01:20:05,166 --> 01:20:06,416 ♪ Give it up ♪ 2218 01:20:06,541 --> 01:20:08,750 ♪ Baby, give it up ♪ 2219 01:20:08,875 --> 01:20:11,291 ♪ Na-na, na-na, na-na, na-na-na-na now ♪ 2220 01:20:11,416 --> 01:20:12,750 ♪ Baby, give it up ♪ 2221 01:20:12,875 --> 01:20:14,125 ♪ Give it up ♪ 2222 01:20:14,250 --> 01:20:16,333 ♪ Baby, give it up ♪ 2223 01:20:16,458 --> 01:20:21,333 [dramatic music] 2224 01:20:26,166 --> 01:20:27,083 [gun clicks] 2225 01:20:27,208 --> 01:20:29,791 You broke my heart. 2226 01:20:29,916 --> 01:20:31,750 [Brian] Ha-ha. How do you like me now?! 2227 01:20:31,875 --> 01:20:33,041 ♪ This is the rhythm of the night ♪ 2228 01:20:33,166 --> 01:20:34,416 Ooh! 2229 01:20:37,000 --> 01:20:38,041 Did I get him? 2230 01:20:38,166 --> 01:20:39,333 - [air bag hisses] - Ooh. 2231 01:20:40,541 --> 01:20:41,416 [Colonel Kurtz grunts] 2232 01:20:41,541 --> 01:20:42,750 [body thumps] 2233 01:20:44,041 --> 01:20:46,666 [groans] How'd I do? 2234 01:20:46,791 --> 01:20:48,416 Did I look cool? 2235 01:20:48,541 --> 01:20:50,041 You did, Dad. 2236 01:20:50,166 --> 01:20:51,916 And you looked badass. 2237 01:20:52,041 --> 01:20:53,625 Yeah, I did. 2238 01:20:55,458 --> 01:20:57,791 [uplifting music] 2239 01:20:57,916 --> 01:21:00,583 We did it, little guy. 2240 01:21:00,708 --> 01:21:01,666 Up high. 2241 01:21:11,583 --> 01:21:13,125 [♪ Jeff Cardoni: “Best Friends”] 2242 01:21:13,250 --> 01:21:16,833 ♪ How to keep your love away? ♪ 2243 01:21:21,416 --> 01:21:22,583 Best friends, Bri? 2244 01:21:24,375 --> 01:21:26,208 Best friends, Bri-Bri. 2245 01:21:34,708 --> 01:21:36,250 How are we gonna get home? 2246 01:21:38,166 --> 01:21:41,083 We don't have a car. 2247 01:21:41,208 --> 01:21:43,416 I guess we'll just have to steal another one, huh? 2248 01:21:43,541 --> 01:21:45,583 Attaboy, Bri. 2249 01:21:45,708 --> 01:21:47,000 Hey, one second. 2250 01:21:47,125 --> 01:21:48,083 What are we gonna do with all those 2251 01:21:48,208 --> 01:21:49,833 psycho killing machines in there? 2252 01:21:49,958 --> 01:21:50,916 [remote whirs] 2253 01:21:51,041 --> 01:21:52,250 Kaboom, bitch! 2254 01:21:54,500 --> 01:21:57,041 [♪ The Dead Drums: "Tune in For the Revolution"] 2255 01:21:58,375 --> 01:22:00,666 ♪ Let's go! ♪ 2256 01:22:00,791 --> 01:22:03,791 ♪ Ah-hah, yeah ♪ 2257 01:22:03,916 --> 01:22:06,541 ♪ Come on, ha-ha ♪ 2258 01:22:06,666 --> 01:22:08,666 ♪ Yeah ♪ 2259 01:22:08,791 --> 01:22:11,041 ♪ Got my picture on the wall like a VIP ♪ 2260 01:22:11,166 --> 01:22:13,583 ♪ next to the no-check sign that's just me ♪ 2261 01:22:13,708 --> 01:22:16,750 ♪ Tell me, what a loser ♪ 2262 01:22:21,875 --> 01:22:24,458 ♪ Tune in for the revolution ♪ 2263 01:22:30,833 --> 01:22:34,250 [rap music] 2264 01:22:35,375 --> 01:22:36,291 [clears throat] Hey. 2265 01:22:36,416 --> 01:22:37,791 - Butthead. - [balloon squeaks] 2266 01:22:37,916 --> 01:22:39,125 I've been meaning to ask you. 2267 01:22:39,250 --> 01:22:41,250 I'm so sorry. 2268 01:22:41,375 --> 01:22:42,291 You know what they say? 2269 01:22:42,416 --> 01:22:44,416 {\an8}- [balloon squeaks] - Sorry. 2270 01:22:45,500 --> 01:22:46,708 [laughter] 2271 01:22:46,833 --> 01:22:48,291 I'm not back in town, Bri! 2272 01:22:49,583 --> 01:22:51,625 He's a very dangerous 12-year-old. 2273 01:22:51,750 --> 01:22:52,833 - [director] All right. - Yeah. 2274 01:22:52,958 --> 01:22:54,208 {\an8}- [tires screech] - [car crashes] 2275 01:22:54,333 --> 01:22:56,041 Not a good idea, Bri-Bri. 2276 01:22:56,166 --> 01:22:58,041 Hey, what's up? 2277 01:23:00,791 --> 01:23:02,916 [laughter] 2278 01:23:03,041 --> 01:23:04,083 [ice rattles] 2279 01:23:04,208 --> 01:23:05,291 What? 2280 01:23:06,583 --> 01:23:08,791 - I'm sorry. - Damn it! 2281 01:23:08,916 --> 01:23:10,458 - Are you insane? - Am I insane? 2282 01:23:10,583 --> 01:23:12,708 You're absolutely back crap--! 2283 01:23:12,833 --> 01:23:15,125 - I'm back crap? - You're back crap. 2284 01:23:15,250 --> 01:23:19,166 [rap music continues] 2285 01:23:19,291 --> 01:23:21,375 ♪ You was always hot ♪ 2286 01:23:21,500 --> 01:23:22,875 ♪ The rhymes were always tighter ♪ 2287 01:23:23,000 --> 01:23:24,416 Like what? 2288 01:23:24,541 --> 01:23:25,916 [Brian] Well, first of all, how about tanning cream 2289 01:23:26,041 --> 01:23:27,458 and bikini underwear? 2290 01:23:27,583 --> 01:23:29,041 That's another problem. 2291 01:23:29,166 --> 01:23:30,500 [laughter] 2292 01:23:30,625 --> 01:23:32,583 Hold up. 2293 01:23:32,708 --> 01:23:34,333 What are you gonna do about all those psycho family? 2294 01:23:34,458 --> 01:23:35,958 What are those names called? What are they called? 2295 01:23:36,083 --> 01:23:37,208 - Psycho family. - What are they? 2296 01:23:37,333 --> 01:23:38,833 - [beep] - Hold up. 2297 01:23:38,958 --> 01:23:40,333 What are you gonna do [indistinct]? 2298 01:23:40,458 --> 01:23:41,875 [laughter] 2299 01:23:42,000 --> 01:23:43,708 Can you believe he's still mad at me 2300 01:23:43,833 --> 01:23:45,541 {\an8}for something that happened 30 years ago? 2301 01:23:47,250 --> 01:23:49,750 {\an8}Did you take my parking spot, Brian? 2302 01:23:49,875 --> 01:23:51,000 - Beep! - [car beeps] 2303 01:23:51,125 --> 01:23:52,083 [Brian laughs] 2304 01:23:52,208 --> 01:23:53,666 Guys, I made my own beep sound. 2305 01:23:53,791 --> 01:23:55,000 [laughter] 2306 01:23:55,125 --> 01:23:57,041 That's an all-time low, even for my acting. 2307 01:23:57,166 --> 01:23:59,791 - You cool with just one Bri? - [bleep] 2308 01:23:59,916 --> 01:24:01,458 What is it? You cool if I just call you... 2309 01:24:01,583 --> 01:24:03,125 - Damn it. - [beep] 2310 01:24:03,250 --> 01:24:04,833 - You co... You co... You... - [beep] 2311 01:24:04,958 --> 01:24:06,416 How about just one Bri? How about just one Bri? 2312 01:24:06,541 --> 01:24:07,458 Cool? How about just one Bri? 2313 01:24:07,583 --> 01:24:08,583 Cool? Yeah, okay. 2314 01:24:08,708 --> 01:24:10,250 Ugh. 2315 01:24:10,375 --> 01:24:14,083 [rap music continues] 2316 01:24:14,208 --> 01:24:16,000 Oh, hey! 2317 01:24:16,125 --> 01:24:18,083 {\an8}Look at that list of super fun stuff I made for me. 2318 01:24:18,208 --> 01:24:20,416 {\an8}It's CJ and me to do now that CJ's mom went tits-up. 2319 01:24:22,333 --> 01:24:23,166 Damn it, man. 2320 01:24:26,708 --> 01:24:27,666 Buckle in, boys. 2321 01:24:27,791 --> 01:24:29,291 [Brian] Hey, what are you doing? 2322 01:24:29,416 --> 01:24:30,250 There's different kids back there. 2323 01:24:30,375 --> 01:24:32,791 [laughter] 2324 01:24:32,916 --> 01:24:34,291 {\an8}Now we're really screwed. 2325 01:24:34,416 --> 01:24:35,416 {\an8}We got different kids all this time. 2326 01:24:35,541 --> 01:24:36,875 {\an8}You keep forgetting the kids! 2327 01:24:37,000 --> 01:24:38,666 Hold up. 2328 01:24:38,791 --> 01:24:39,666 What are we gonna do about all those 2329 01:24:39,791 --> 01:24:41,833 psycho killing machines in there? 2330 01:24:41,958 --> 01:24:43,666 [laughter] 2331 01:24:43,791 --> 01:24:45,375 You have the same problem I do. 2332 01:24:45,500 --> 01:24:48,291 [laughter] 2333 01:24:48,416 --> 01:24:49,416 Oh, I almost dropped this. 2334 01:24:49,541 --> 01:24:51,041 [laughter] 2335 01:24:51,166 --> 01:24:54,250 [rap music continues] 2336 01:24:54,375 --> 01:24:55,416 Clear! Clear! 2337 01:24:58,250 --> 01:24:59,833 [groans] 2338 01:24:59,958 --> 01:25:02,083 Yo, Hunt. We'll get ‘em next time, huh, bro? 2339 01:25:02,208 --> 01:25:03,250 Don't call me “bro,” dude. 2340 01:25:03,375 --> 01:25:04,916 Don't call me “bro,” son. 2341 01:25:05,041 --> 01:25:06,708 [laughter] 2342 01:25:06,833 --> 01:25:07,958 One guy died in my arms 2343 01:25:08,083 --> 01:25:09,833 while I slowly watched him bleed out. 2344 01:25:09,958 --> 01:25:11,416 Sick, right? 2345 01:25:11,541 --> 01:25:12,500 I hate that. 2346 01:25:12,625 --> 01:25:14,208 [laughter] 2347 01:25:14,333 --> 01:25:16,208 Hiya! 2348 01:25:16,333 --> 01:25:17,750 [groans] 2349 01:25:19,333 --> 01:25:21,416 - [groans] I missed the door. - [bleep] 2350 01:25:21,541 --> 01:25:22,875 Sorry. 2351 01:25:23,000 --> 01:25:24,583 God. 2352 01:25:24,708 --> 01:25:26,708 Emily! Hey, how you doing, sweetie? 2353 01:25:26,833 --> 01:25:28,416 [Emily] Oh, hi. Is this Jeff? 2354 01:25:28,541 --> 01:25:30,583 In the... flesh. 2355 01:25:30,708 --> 01:25:33,125 [insect chirping] 2356 01:25:33,250 --> 01:25:35,000 Hi, Em. Is that me? 2357 01:25:35,125 --> 01:25:36,333 I'm waiting. I don't want to... 2358 01:25:36,458 --> 01:25:37,833 - I screwed it up. - I don't want to get--all right. 2359 01:25:37,958 --> 01:25:39,500 I was trying to come up with something else. 2360 01:25:39,625 --> 01:25:41,541 Okay, get off. I smell your ass in a raccoon hat [indistinct]. 2361 01:25:42,791 --> 01:25:43,791 [laughter] 2362 01:25:43,916 --> 01:25:45,333 [grunts] 2363 01:25:45,458 --> 01:25:46,791 [laughing] 2364 01:25:46,916 --> 01:25:48,000 I didn't know where to put my legs. 2365 01:25:48,125 --> 01:25:49,750 That was a very weird one, man. 2366 01:25:49,875 --> 01:25:51,791 [dramatic music] 2367 01:25:51,916 --> 01:25:52,833 - [loud thump] - [Jeff] Ow! 2368 01:25:55,333 --> 01:25:56,458 [up-tempo music] 2369 01:25:56,583 --> 01:25:59,041 So? Tell me about the playdate. 2370 01:25:59,166 --> 01:26:00,375 Lucas said it was, like, 2371 01:26:00,500 --> 01:26:02,083 literally the best day of his whole entire life. 2372 01:26:02,208 --> 01:26:03,833 Well, it was definitely something. 2373 01:26:03,958 --> 01:26:05,958 - [scoffs] - [doorbell rings] 2374 01:26:07,083 --> 01:26:08,291 Bri-Bri! 2375 01:26:08,416 --> 01:26:09,250 Jeff, what the hell are you doing? 2376 01:26:09,375 --> 01:26:10,583 It's two o'clock in the morning. 2377 01:26:10,708 --> 01:26:11,625 You didn't give me an address, 2378 01:26:11,750 --> 01:26:13,458 so I had to knock on a lot of doors. 2379 01:26:13,583 --> 01:26:14,791 You're never gonna guess what happened. 2380 01:26:14,916 --> 01:26:15,958 I don't feel like guessing. 2381 01:26:16,083 --> 01:26:17,250 - Oh, guess. - [Brian] I don't want to guess. 2382 01:26:17,375 --> 01:26:18,500 - Oh, just guess. - [Brian] I'm not-- 2383 01:26:18,625 --> 01:26:20,041 - I'm not guessing. - Guess. 2384 01:26:20,166 --> 01:26:23,416 [sighs] You stole another minivan. 2385 01:26:23,541 --> 01:26:24,583 What? [scoffs] 2386 01:26:24,708 --> 01:26:26,291 That's a stupid guess. No. 2387 01:26:26,416 --> 01:26:27,875 They burned our house down. 2388 01:26:28,000 --> 01:26:29,125 Who, Maddox? 2389 01:26:29,250 --> 01:26:31,208 No, totally different group of bad people. 2390 01:26:31,333 --> 01:26:32,250 I'll tell you all about it. 2391 01:26:32,375 --> 01:26:33,250 Let's go, CJ. 2392 01:26:33,375 --> 01:26:34,208 [Jeff] I call top bunk. 2393 01:26:34,333 --> 01:26:35,208 [CJ] Bottom. 2394 01:26:35,333 --> 01:26:36,666 [door bangs] 2395 01:26:36,791 --> 01:26:41,666 [dramatic music] 2396 01:28:31,916 --> 01:28:36,791 {\an8}[classical music] 2397 01:28:59,333 --> 01:29:04,208 [foreboding music] 2398 01:32:05,875 --> 01:32:10,791 [upbeat music]