1 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:29,487 [sniffles, exhales] 2 00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:37,370 [sniffling] 3 00:00:41,458 --> 00:00:42,667 [whimpers] 4 00:00:59,642 --> 00:01:00,769 [sighs] 5 00:01:32,842 --> 00:01:33,843 [door closes] 6 00:01:37,305 --> 00:01:39,307 [♪ "Dedicated To You" playing] 7 00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:01,496 [sighs] 8 00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:02,789 You can't be here. 9 00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:05,458 Lois, please, come sit. 10 00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:06,793 Please. 11 00:02:08,044 --> 00:02:10,964 Redd, will you come out and sit as well? 12 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:15,552 She's making her famous, uh, Cincinnati chili and lavender lemonade. 13 00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:19,514 We-We weren't sure where you were with your sobriety, but... So we have options. 14 00:02:19,514 --> 00:02:22,142 - Cincinnati what? - Chili. It's, um... 15 00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:26,980 The secret is cinnamon and unsweetened chocolate, yes? 16 00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:29,065 And Worcestershire sauce. 17 00:02:29,065 --> 00:02:31,943 And, of course, mild cheddar. Sharp doesn't melt right. 18 00:02:31,943 --> 00:02:34,028 - Good? Great! - Good. 19 00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:38,700 What the fuck is this freak show? 20 00:02:40,577 --> 00:02:44,038 Come, come, come. Come sit. I'll make you something. 21 00:02:44,038 --> 00:02:46,207 Now, please, just hear me out. 22 00:02:53,214 --> 00:02:55,341 Admittedly, we have screwed up a lot. 23 00:02:57,844 --> 00:02:59,846 We haven't been guardians of our good fortune, 24 00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:02,390 such as the miracle of your recovery. 25 00:03:02,390 --> 00:03:07,645 There's so much good, so much worth holding on to. 26 00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:12,483 [inhales sharply] Like? 27 00:03:12,483 --> 00:03:13,693 Cheers, honey. 28 00:03:14,402 --> 00:03:16,404 A structure, a foundation, a history. 29 00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:20,825 Merritt may well be finding happiness of, uh, of some sort. 30 00:03:20,825 --> 00:03:24,662 But I think she still needs us. She needs a united front. 31 00:03:24,662 --> 00:03:27,957 Let's follow the example of the young. 32 00:03:29,292 --> 00:03:32,420 Let's all live together. 33 00:03:34,505 --> 00:03:36,841 Marshall, are you insane? 34 00:03:36,841 --> 00:03:40,136 - We've served each other divorce papers. - Nothing is final yet. 35 00:03:40,136 --> 00:03:43,264 You said you hated me. [scoffs] 36 00:03:44,182 --> 00:03:47,268 So, what? Me, you, and the gourmet madame, 37 00:03:47,268 --> 00:03:49,312 we all going to share the same bed, or what? 38 00:03:49,312 --> 00:03:52,232 Oh, well, no. Uh, no, that's-- that's not exactly... 39 00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:54,692 - I'm not... Not that I'm not fluid. - No, no. 40 00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:58,780 That part of us-- [chuckles] That part of us, you and I, is over. 41 00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:00,198 [Marshall, Redd laugh] 42 00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:02,784 Marshall thinks that he and I should move into the guest room 43 00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:04,911 and you should stay where you are. 44 00:04:06,371 --> 00:04:07,747 And you all right with this? 45 00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:11,626 Well, I did live in a commune... [laughs] ...for a couple of months in the 1980s 46 00:04:11,626 --> 00:04:14,462 and, well, none of us are getting any younger. 47 00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:16,881 No spring chickens here. [laughs] 48 00:04:16,881 --> 00:04:19,092 And I do like cooking for a crowd. 49 00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:23,304 The old ways don't work anymore. There must be new paradigms. 50 00:04:23,304 --> 00:04:26,516 I love you. I do not hate you. 51 00:04:26,516 --> 00:04:30,603 One says things in life, but family... 52 00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:34,899 Ed, your affair with Ed, everything we've done to each other... 53 00:04:34,899 --> 00:04:35,984 Fuck. 54 00:04:37,193 --> 00:04:43,449 Don't tell me I am still in a coma, and I'm dreaming. Am I? 55 00:04:43,449 --> 00:04:46,077 [Marshall chuckles] No. 56 00:04:46,077 --> 00:04:47,829 [continues chuckling] 57 00:04:51,874 --> 00:04:55,003 You gaslit me for years. 58 00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:58,673 Let me be clear, Marshall. 59 00:04:58,673 --> 00:05:03,594 I intend to move forward with this divorce smoothly and efficiently. 60 00:05:05,263 --> 00:05:07,307 I don't want to love or hate you. 61 00:05:08,558 --> 00:05:12,270 I just want to be at peace with what you are. 62 00:05:14,022 --> 00:05:17,734 But, Lois, we have an opportunity to do something deep, 63 00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,402 - something... something better. - [shushes] 64 00:05:19,402 --> 00:05:22,113 Marshall, I told you she wouldn't go for this. 65 00:05:23,031 --> 00:05:26,326 You know, women our age, we can't forgive these things. 66 00:05:28,036 --> 00:05:29,245 Please, Lois. 67 00:05:30,621 --> 00:05:34,042 [sighs] I need both of you so badly. 68 00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:46,471 Accountability is everything. 69 00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:50,683 Please... 70 00:05:56,481 --> 00:05:59,275 Just... Jesus. 71 00:05:59,275 --> 00:06:01,694 Go. Just go. 72 00:06:11,537 --> 00:06:12,955 [door slams] 73 00:06:26,719 --> 00:06:31,182 How the fuck did I end up in this terrible desert town? 74 00:06:31,182 --> 00:06:34,018 - What? - I mean, it offers nothing. 75 00:06:34,018 --> 00:06:35,353 Nothing! 76 00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:40,233 I mean, there's no-- there's no decent, proper movie theater. 77 00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:42,652 There's... If you want a bagel, good luck. 78 00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:45,029 And there's not even a decent florist. 79 00:06:45,029 --> 00:06:47,907 [stammers] I thought you liked silence. 80 00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:49,200 I hate it! 81 00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:54,747 What's that about? 82 00:06:57,083 --> 00:07:01,087 And I think I hate you too a little bit. You know, just to be perfectly frank. 83 00:07:02,713 --> 00:07:04,215 Yeah. God. 84 00:07:08,302 --> 00:07:12,098 Yeah. I suppose this is the moment that I tell you. Yeah. 85 00:07:14,976 --> 00:07:16,060 Tell me? 86 00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:18,980 I know. 87 00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:20,481 I know. 88 00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:26,404 I know it now because I suspected. And I found out. 89 00:07:27,613 --> 00:07:29,949 Why did you seduce me if you didn't really want me? 90 00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:31,325 What are you talking about? 91 00:07:31,325 --> 00:07:33,077 Oh! Oh, stop! 92 00:07:33,077 --> 00:07:34,954 [scoffs] 93 00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:36,539 "Oh, what are you talking about?" 94 00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:39,375 [laughs] 95 00:07:39,375 --> 00:07:41,210 One of the women came to see me. 96 00:07:41,210 --> 00:07:45,131 And she'd spoken to several other faculty wives. 97 00:07:46,924 --> 00:07:51,220 Yeah. I do hope you find some way of, you know, addressing this compulsion. 98 00:07:51,721 --> 00:07:54,974 - Fucking in-- - You should know. I fight it. 99 00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:58,603 For many, many years I believed in a moral code. 100 00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:01,355 - [scoffs] - No, but we now know 101 00:08:01,355 --> 00:08:04,233 that such a thing does not matter. 102 00:08:04,233 --> 00:08:08,070 [stammers] So now you just take whatever you want? 103 00:08:08,070 --> 00:08:10,573 But hear me. Hear me. Hear. 104 00:08:11,574 --> 00:08:14,243 This plan that you just presented to Lois, 105 00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:17,663 I only went along with it for one reason. 106 00:08:19,123 --> 00:08:20,166 Which is? 107 00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:22,251 I knew she'd turn you down. 108 00:08:23,961 --> 00:08:29,884 And I wanted to be present for your final humiliation. 109 00:08:37,642 --> 00:08:38,768 [Redd gasps] 110 00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:42,480 Oh, geez. I've gotta get to the club. I've gotta get those girls in shape. 111 00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:45,983 Their pasties keep falling off and I don't think it's an accident. 112 00:09:21,185 --> 00:09:23,854 I have so much love to share. I love you. 113 00:09:25,106 --> 00:09:27,149 - I love my wife. - I know. 114 00:09:30,069 --> 00:09:31,070 But... 115 00:09:34,323 --> 00:09:36,867 I'll give you till the end of the week, and then I want you gone. 116 00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:39,620 It'll be like you never happened. 117 00:09:41,038 --> 00:09:42,498 Kind of a bad dream... 118 00:09:43,666 --> 00:09:45,459 which is meant to be forgotten. 119 00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:34,008 [Marshall] But maybe the management of our terror has been unequal to the task! 120 00:10:34,008 --> 00:10:37,303 Like during the end of days of the Roman Empire, 121 00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:40,181 we too face insurmountable obstacles, 122 00:10:40,181 --> 00:10:43,601 internal decay, and external pressure. 123 00:10:43,601 --> 00:10:44,894 And economically... 124 00:10:44,894 --> 00:10:48,689 Economically growing inequality and instability. 125 00:10:53,569 --> 00:10:57,573 Rome used slave labor. Well, we do too. 126 00:10:58,074 --> 00:11:00,618 Really. Does that sound familiar? 127 00:11:01,118 --> 00:11:03,371 See, they too had environmental collapse. 128 00:11:03,371 --> 00:11:07,416 Rome's moral decline is just like today's. 129 00:11:10,795 --> 00:11:12,838 We-We see it all around us. 130 00:11:12,838 --> 00:11:16,384 We see it all around us. No moral coherence or consequences. 131 00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:18,219 Add to that cyber warfare 132 00:11:18,219 --> 00:11:21,597 and the cascade of global conflicts we insist on meddling in. 133 00:11:21,597 --> 00:11:25,476 And ladies and gentlemen, welcome to ancient Rome. 134 00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:32,566 [door closes] 135 00:11:38,656 --> 00:11:40,199 And, uh... 136 00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:44,495 just like Rome... 137 00:11:47,039 --> 00:11:48,958 we still cling to our... 138 00:11:52,169 --> 00:11:56,006 outmoded modes of how to be. 139 00:12:02,972 --> 00:12:06,851 Our small gods, our prayers... 140 00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:12,565 the very ways we manage our terror. 141 00:12:14,442 --> 00:12:18,404 They did no good in ancient Rome and they do no good here today. 142 00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:19,905 It's every-- 143 00:12:21,657 --> 00:12:23,576 every man for themselves. 144 00:12:31,125 --> 00:12:34,170 Thank you, class. That... That's it for today. 145 00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:35,838 I-I need this space. 146 00:12:35,838 --> 00:12:39,175 I need to talk to these fine officers that have come here today. 147 00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:41,343 Thank you. Thank you so much. 148 00:12:41,343 --> 00:12:43,345 [students murmuring] 149 00:12:52,938 --> 00:12:54,190 [Chief] Professor. 150 00:12:54,815 --> 00:12:55,816 Hi. 151 00:12:57,193 --> 00:12:59,153 Hello, Chief. What can I do for you? 152 00:12:59,153 --> 00:13:01,781 Professor, a student of yours, Mary Colsby, 153 00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,866 has made a very serious charge against you. 154 00:13:03,866 --> 00:13:05,034 Against me? 155 00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:09,079 Sexual assault. Is this Ms. Colsby? 156 00:13:10,748 --> 00:13:12,833 Y-Yes. Yes. 157 00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:15,085 [stammers] 158 00:13:15,085 --> 00:13:19,131 Gale, look. Ms. Colsby and I had a relationship. 159 00:13:19,131 --> 00:13:21,133 It was as consenting adults. 160 00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:25,095 There was no assault, much less a rape. 161 00:13:25,095 --> 00:13:27,848 And we even parted on-on good terms. 162 00:13:28,390 --> 00:13:29,600 [chuckles] This is not true. 163 00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:31,811 She has a very different account, 164 00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:34,355 and we have to ask you to come downtown with us. 165 00:13:35,606 --> 00:13:37,441 Am... Am I under arrest? 166 00:13:37,441 --> 00:13:38,734 Marshall, I am not cuffing you. 167 00:13:38,734 --> 00:13:41,904 I'm not making a spectacle, but you are in custody, yes. 168 00:13:42,404 --> 00:13:43,697 [stammers] Wha... 169 00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:45,741 Wh-What about my work? 170 00:13:45,741 --> 00:13:48,619 My-My teaching, my-my job? 171 00:13:48,619 --> 00:13:50,120 Wh-What's going to happen to me? 172 00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:52,873 If the past is any indication, you'll be fired. 173 00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:57,044 What about my word? What... My... Don't I have a say in the-the... 174 00:13:57,044 --> 00:13:59,505 - I'm going to fight this. - You'll have the chance to. 175 00:13:59,505 --> 00:14:02,591 I-I will. This is... This is just another instance of 176 00:14:02,591 --> 00:14:05,553 a black man being strung up on the word of a woman. 177 00:14:05,553 --> 00:14:08,013 No, no. Look, look, look. 178 00:14:08,973 --> 00:14:11,809 The texts. The texts. Look, look. 179 00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:14,687 Listen. "Marshall, I'm glad we can remain friends. 180 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:19,525 You did the right thing, and you were gracious and kind in doing it. 181 00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:22,319 It makes me love you more." 182 00:14:23,070 --> 00:14:25,865 Does-Does that sound like something you'd send to a rapist? 183 00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:26,949 Look, here's... Look. 184 00:14:26,949 --> 00:14:31,912 "Marshall, I'm free between classes. Do you want to meet for coffee?" 185 00:14:31,912 --> 00:14:34,832 Does that... Or-Or, "Marshall, I need your advice 186 00:14:34,832 --> 00:14:38,586 on which modern history professor you like. Is Hartley okay?" 187 00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:41,171 And yet we have her account, and the DA decided to go ahead. 188 00:14:41,171 --> 00:14:42,882 And I tend to believe women in these matters. 189 00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:44,091 [Marshall] Megan. 190 00:14:44,091 --> 00:14:45,551 [Megan] I am sorry. 191 00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:46,677 [Marshall] Megan... 192 00:14:47,469 --> 00:14:48,929 It's addiction, isn't it? 193 00:14:48,929 --> 00:14:50,931 Addiction? S-Stop. Wait. 194 00:14:50,931 --> 00:14:53,017 You-You have these pathologies 195 00:14:53,017 --> 00:14:56,478 that you don't have the slightest understanding of what you're saying. 196 00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:59,523 [stammers] Everyone's an amateur shrink these days. 197 00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:03,068 You cannot continue to destroy people's lives in this manner. 198 00:15:04,445 --> 00:15:08,115 Megan, is there something you can do? 199 00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:09,867 [stammers] 200 00:15:09,867 --> 00:15:12,328 How many times have you dined at our house? 201 00:15:13,370 --> 00:15:15,039 Meg-Megan. 202 00:15:15,039 --> 00:15:16,916 Marshall, call your lawyer. 203 00:15:16,916 --> 00:15:19,919 We're gonna print you and we're gonna take a picture, 204 00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:21,754 and you'll be home by dinner. 205 00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:27,968 [police radio chatter] 206 00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:40,356 You're being released on your own recognizance. 207 00:15:43,734 --> 00:15:46,612 I suggest you find some sort of help. You need it. 208 00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:54,620 [Marshall] It makes no sense to pretend to be 209 00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:58,916 some ancient stoic, enduring what comes, 210 00:15:58,916 --> 00:16:02,795 when all my choices have led me to this dark wood. 211 00:16:04,463 --> 00:16:09,051 It makes no sense to try and salvage the marriage, the career. 212 00:16:09,843 --> 00:16:13,764 The stain of my mistakes cannot be expunged. 213 00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:18,435 Like the woman in the play who said "Out, damned spot". 214 00:16:19,603 --> 00:16:23,857 When a man of my generation, color, is marked, 215 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:29,947 the expulsion from the world of the living is all that is left. 216 00:16:32,116 --> 00:16:37,204 I might be remembered for some small bit of good, I hope. 217 00:16:37,705 --> 00:16:39,915 I love so many people, so much. 218 00:16:40,582 --> 00:16:42,918 How it hurts to disappoint them. 219 00:16:46,171 --> 00:16:50,926 I suppose this is the last proof that I am indeed still, 220 00:16:51,844 --> 00:16:57,224 for a few minutes at least, still a member of the human race. 221 00:16:57,224 --> 00:16:59,143 [clock ticking] 222 00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:11,030 [ticking fades, ends] 223 00:17:20,372 --> 00:17:21,915 [Marshall] Am I dead? 224 00:17:22,666 --> 00:17:24,793 - [Redd] Well, let's see. - [heart monitor beeping] 225 00:17:32,551 --> 00:17:33,552 No. 226 00:17:35,763 --> 00:17:39,516 [inhales sharply] Trazodone and Ambien can of course do the trick, 227 00:17:39,516 --> 00:17:43,062 but in a man your size, with a full stomach... 228 00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:46,315 Luckily, you were low on your prescriptions. 229 00:17:47,149 --> 00:17:48,567 I found you. 230 00:17:48,567 --> 00:17:50,527 They pumped your stomach, and... 231 00:17:51,653 --> 00:17:53,363 yeah, here we are. 232 00:17:54,698 --> 00:17:56,241 Was it a cry for help? 233 00:17:58,202 --> 00:17:59,870 Or a real attempt? 234 00:18:02,998 --> 00:18:07,586 Nothing has changed between us, Marshall. 235 00:18:07,586 --> 00:18:09,588 I know about the arrest. 236 00:18:13,759 --> 00:18:14,802 How? 237 00:18:15,969 --> 00:18:17,513 This is not a large city. 238 00:18:22,267 --> 00:18:24,103 Your daughter's here. I called her. 239 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:25,312 [Marshall groans] 240 00:18:26,063 --> 00:18:28,357 I don't want to see her. 241 00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:30,400 Oh, what you want is beside the point. 242 00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:33,070 You've made your position clear. 243 00:18:33,821 --> 00:18:35,948 Sometimes I think it's brave to leave. 244 00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:39,326 It's no achievement to stay if you hate this party. 245 00:18:39,326 --> 00:18:42,746 But it's also terribly cowardly at the same time. 246 00:18:44,039 --> 00:18:48,877 My understanding of philosophy made me accept 247 00:18:48,877 --> 00:18:52,381 the nothingness that is to come. 248 00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:54,842 Which you would have poured all over your daughter, 249 00:18:54,842 --> 00:18:56,969 drenched her in it, you selfish man. 250 00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:02,599 And now, you've taken away everyone's choice. 251 00:19:05,769 --> 00:19:10,732 We can only be angry and grateful, and angry and grateful, until we are not. 252 00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:12,651 [Redd sniffles] 253 00:19:17,823 --> 00:19:20,659 I'll give you a few days to get your things and get out. 254 00:19:22,286 --> 00:19:24,121 [footsteps fading] 255 00:19:32,629 --> 00:19:37,009 I don't... have anything left to say... 256 00:19:39,303 --> 00:19:40,721 other than... 257 00:19:43,307 --> 00:19:45,017 I apologize... 258 00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,063 from what's left of myself. 259 00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:53,066 [footsteps approach] 260 00:19:53,066 --> 00:19:54,902 The so-called self. 261 00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:06,747 Dad, listen to me. 262 00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:09,333 Just listen. 263 00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:11,585 You are the only father that I have. 264 00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:16,298 But you make it really hard for me to still want to know you. 265 00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:19,801 But I... I do. 266 00:20:22,512 --> 00:20:24,890 I don't know how to turn off loving you. 267 00:20:27,476 --> 00:20:29,895 I don't want to see a world without you in it. 268 00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:34,024 I have so much life to come. Like, so much. 269 00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:37,903 Children, pain, love... 270 00:20:39,112 --> 00:20:40,239 Fear. 271 00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:43,075 A crazy mother. 272 00:20:45,827 --> 00:20:52,000 Please, please, try to think of a time that's gonna be better than this moment. 273 00:20:53,543 --> 00:20:54,670 It's possible. 274 00:20:55,420 --> 00:20:57,047 It's possible. Maybe better. 275 00:20:57,839 --> 00:21:01,885 I don't... I don't know if I... I don't know if I can. 276 00:21:03,512 --> 00:21:07,933 Maybe this moment is the best I can hope for. 277 00:21:07,933 --> 00:21:09,601 Well, then, so be it. 278 00:21:11,436 --> 00:21:13,063 That has to be enough. 279 00:21:22,364 --> 00:21:24,324 I love you so much. 280 00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:00,444 [phone buzzes] 281 00:22:14,541 --> 00:22:16,043 [typing] 282 00:22:54,956 --> 00:22:56,041 What is this, Ed? 283 00:22:56,541 --> 00:22:57,959 Just come with me, Marshall. 284 00:22:58,919 --> 00:23:01,922 I joined a group. A men's group that helped me. 285 00:23:35,038 --> 00:23:37,958 What, uh, what happened to the mullet? 286 00:23:38,959 --> 00:23:40,710 I had to face some hard truths. 287 00:23:41,545 --> 00:23:45,590 I cut it. All part of cleaning up my act. 288 00:23:48,093 --> 00:23:50,762 What kind of group is this exactly? 289 00:23:50,762 --> 00:23:52,389 Is it religious? 290 00:23:52,389 --> 00:23:56,184 No. Support and brotherhood. 291 00:23:56,184 --> 00:23:58,937 Because we all got one thing in common. 292 00:23:59,604 --> 00:24:00,647 And that is? 293 00:24:07,362 --> 00:24:11,032 Let me ask you a question. Are you an angry man? 294 00:24:13,243 --> 00:24:15,370 Have I sensed that before? 295 00:24:19,916 --> 00:24:21,126 My anger... 296 00:24:21,751 --> 00:24:23,962 [chuckles] It is my salvation. 297 00:24:46,818 --> 00:24:48,612 [doors open] 298 00:24:58,288 --> 00:24:59,289 [door slams] 299 00:24:59,289 --> 00:25:01,750 [computerized voice] Gentlemen, tonight is special. 300 00:25:03,335 --> 00:25:05,170 A new friend is among us. 301 00:25:11,718 --> 00:25:13,470 One who is lost. 302 00:25:13,470 --> 00:25:15,931 It is our duty to show him the way. 303 00:25:16,598 --> 00:25:19,184 We cannot be afraid of offending people. 304 00:25:20,060 --> 00:25:21,645 That is the price of honesty. 305 00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:28,527 And tonight, we will invite our new friend to have an honest conversation. 306 00:25:28,527 --> 00:25:30,612 [droplets dripping, echoing] 307 00:25:38,912 --> 00:25:40,080 [computerized voice] Hello, Ed. 308 00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:42,832 And hello, professor. 309 00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:46,336 You get used to the mustiness of the space. 310 00:25:49,839 --> 00:25:51,925 I am Dr. Milton Smythe. 311 00:25:53,760 --> 00:25:55,887 Ed has spoken often of you. 312 00:25:55,887 --> 00:26:00,058 We've chosen to interview you so we all can get to know you. 313 00:26:02,269 --> 00:26:06,439 Sit, gentlemen, so we can complete the circle of truths. 314 00:26:07,649 --> 00:26:10,610 Welcome to the Mexicali Men's Club. 315 00:26:18,577 --> 00:26:20,787 [buzzing] 316 00:26:23,206 --> 00:26:26,876 Professor, the, uh... The new pronouns, 317 00:26:26,876 --> 00:26:28,628 how do you feel about them? 318 00:26:32,924 --> 00:26:38,638 Yes. Your question about the new pronouns... 319 00:26:38,638 --> 00:26:45,186 I have many students who are trying to define and explore their identities. 320 00:26:45,937 --> 00:26:47,439 Um... 321 00:26:47,439 --> 00:26:49,274 We have discussions, 322 00:26:49,274 --> 00:26:53,570 and I do ask them what pronouns they like to use, 323 00:26:53,570 --> 00:26:57,741 but, you know, I will admit, I'm getting confused 324 00:26:58,408 --> 00:27:01,036 trying to keep up with the variants, 325 00:27:01,036 --> 00:27:06,958 - such as Xe, X-Xem... - [attendant 1] Mm-hmm. 326 00:27:06,958 --> 00:27:10,629 Xyr. You know, but I get it. You know... 327 00:27:10,629 --> 00:27:11,713 [booing] 328 00:27:11,713 --> 00:27:15,675 [Eddie] Hey, shut the fuck up. How about we have some decency? 329 00:27:16,509 --> 00:27:18,219 It is confusing, 330 00:27:18,219 --> 00:27:23,558 but it costs absolutely nothing to respect those who don't follow your norms. 331 00:27:23,558 --> 00:27:26,311 So if you can't get on board with that, then just shut it. 332 00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:30,607 Now, Marshall, 333 00:27:30,607 --> 00:27:34,694 how do you see the role of men in the culture shifting? 334 00:27:35,862 --> 00:27:37,280 There's a revolution. 335 00:27:38,323 --> 00:27:39,741 A correction. 336 00:27:39,741 --> 00:27:41,993 And some of these are too drastic. 337 00:27:41,993 --> 00:27:47,123 Uh, witch hunts. Men being accused of, and convicted 338 00:27:47,123 --> 00:27:48,541 without evidence. 339 00:27:51,419 --> 00:27:52,754 Like you? 340 00:27:59,302 --> 00:28:01,262 Men and boys being marginalized, 341 00:28:01,262 --> 00:28:05,141 and now men who point them out 342 00:28:05,141 --> 00:28:11,147 are perceived as predatory and-and dangerous. 343 00:28:11,147 --> 00:28:12,691 [chair clatters] 344 00:28:14,943 --> 00:28:18,488 As a result of all these accusations, 345 00:28:18,488 --> 00:28:21,908 we're becoming the defensive gender, 346 00:28:21,908 --> 00:28:25,829 second-guessing our nature to the degree that is cancerous, 347 00:28:25,829 --> 00:28:30,250 as though strong men are frightening. 348 00:28:32,001 --> 00:28:33,670 But I think-- 349 00:28:35,422 --> 00:28:39,551 I think weak men are much more dangerous. 350 00:28:39,551 --> 00:28:41,136 - [attendant 2] Yeah! - [attendant 3] Yeah! 351 00:28:41,136 --> 00:28:42,262 [attendant 4] Yeah! 352 00:28:43,054 --> 00:28:44,347 Yes. 353 00:28:45,265 --> 00:28:46,641 Yes. 354 00:28:50,019 --> 00:28:52,605 Strength is everything. 355 00:28:52,605 --> 00:28:54,482 I mean, I remember working at that mall, 356 00:28:54,482 --> 00:28:57,986 wearing that damn Cinnabon outfit all up and down those halls. 357 00:28:57,986 --> 00:28:59,988 I couldn't even take it off on my break. 358 00:28:59,988 --> 00:29:01,781 You guys have no idea. 359 00:29:01,781 --> 00:29:04,534 My lowest moment, even though I was the night manager, 360 00:29:04,534 --> 00:29:06,494 was when I would walk by women 361 00:29:06,494 --> 00:29:09,581 and they would laugh in my face like I was nothing. 362 00:29:13,001 --> 00:29:14,711 I was just trying to make a living. 363 00:29:16,087 --> 00:29:17,672 That crushed me. 364 00:29:18,590 --> 00:29:21,676 I had to learn not to just be angry, you know. 365 00:29:22,469 --> 00:29:24,971 Because the stronger path-- 366 00:29:25,722 --> 00:29:28,183 and I learned this with the men in this room-- 367 00:29:30,310 --> 00:29:32,479 was to find success and rigor. 368 00:29:34,564 --> 00:29:35,857 And that is hard. 369 00:29:37,025 --> 00:29:38,276 It is. 370 00:29:39,569 --> 00:29:40,570 It is. 371 00:29:40,570 --> 00:29:41,863 Marshall, 372 00:29:42,572 --> 00:29:45,116 you were recently me-tooed and canceled, 373 00:29:45,116 --> 00:29:47,285 and-- and I believe, 374 00:29:47,285 --> 00:29:50,330 and I know the founders of this group believe... 375 00:29:50,330 --> 00:29:51,414 [door closes] 376 00:29:51,414 --> 00:29:55,752 ...that you can't just erase people who make mistakes. 377 00:29:55,752 --> 00:29:57,420 So how do we move forward? 378 00:29:57,420 --> 00:29:59,047 I am... 379 00:30:00,632 --> 00:30:03,259 frankly struggling with this. 380 00:30:04,844 --> 00:30:06,429 I am angry 381 00:30:07,639 --> 00:30:10,183 that a consensual affair 382 00:30:11,226 --> 00:30:14,687 between adults was used to hurt me. 383 00:30:14,687 --> 00:30:17,190 And I'm-- 384 00:30:17,190 --> 00:30:19,776 I'm now sullied, and my name is-- 385 00:30:19,776 --> 00:30:21,277 Has been destroyed. 386 00:30:21,986 --> 00:30:23,988 And that sucks. 387 00:30:23,988 --> 00:30:26,699 Damaged at the very least. 388 00:30:27,951 --> 00:30:30,703 But it's now up to me to reclaim it somehow 389 00:30:30,703 --> 00:30:36,042 and not shy away from the fight to seek truth 390 00:30:36,042 --> 00:30:39,420 and insist on what is right. 391 00:30:41,047 --> 00:30:42,215 We're folding. 392 00:30:43,216 --> 00:30:48,680 Did you know that men die of suicide in far greater numbers than women? 393 00:30:52,308 --> 00:30:54,894 And I'm going to admit right now 394 00:30:54,894 --> 00:30:57,272 that I recently attempted suicide. 395 00:30:57,272 --> 00:30:59,274 [attendants murmur] 396 00:30:59,274 --> 00:31:01,025 Wh-Where does it end? 397 00:31:02,318 --> 00:31:04,153 Perhaps the issue is 398 00:31:04,153 --> 00:31:10,952 that we need to return to a much more traditional model for society. 399 00:31:10,952 --> 00:31:13,037 [cheering] 400 00:31:20,753 --> 00:31:21,880 Ho, ho, ho. 401 00:31:22,463 --> 00:31:25,008 Uh, yes, sir. You have something to add? 402 00:31:26,551 --> 00:31:29,387 [computerized voice] A return to individual responsibility, 403 00:31:29,387 --> 00:31:32,015 the importance of hierarchy 404 00:31:32,015 --> 00:31:34,309 and order. 405 00:31:34,309 --> 00:31:36,060 Correct? 406 00:31:37,395 --> 00:31:38,396 Yes. 407 00:31:39,397 --> 00:31:43,318 Yes, I believe that a way to return to those principles 408 00:31:43,318 --> 00:31:45,778 is through consequences. 409 00:31:49,198 --> 00:31:52,076 Many of the men in this room have said, 410 00:31:54,037 --> 00:31:56,873 given everything that's going on around us, 411 00:31:57,832 --> 00:32:00,376 the crime, the lawlessness, 412 00:32:01,461 --> 00:32:03,212 - the divisive culture... - Mmm. 413 00:32:04,213 --> 00:32:08,009 ...that it feels like we're living in a goddamn horror movie. 414 00:32:08,009 --> 00:32:09,218 [attendant 5] That's right. 415 00:32:09,218 --> 00:32:10,303 Am I right? 416 00:32:11,763 --> 00:32:13,306 Have you ever felt that? 417 00:32:14,641 --> 00:32:18,061 Perhaps it's time to find the bogeyman 418 00:32:18,061 --> 00:32:19,938 and slaughter it, 419 00:32:19,938 --> 00:32:23,566 so that it never again rises out of the lake 420 00:32:23,566 --> 00:32:25,360 or out of the fog 421 00:32:25,360 --> 00:32:29,864 or never again tries to take what is ours. 422 00:32:33,993 --> 00:32:35,954 I think I speak for all of us. 423 00:32:37,997 --> 00:32:41,584 Welcome to the Mexicali Men's Club, Professor. 424 00:32:41,584 --> 00:32:42,669 [applause] 425 00:32:42,669 --> 00:32:46,965 We would love for you to join us as we seek a way out of this nightmare. 426 00:32:46,965 --> 00:32:49,509 [applause continues] 427 00:32:49,509 --> 00:32:51,511 Please stand to be acknowledged. 428 00:32:51,511 --> 00:32:53,429 [applause, cheering] 429 00:33:12,115 --> 00:33:14,117 [applause, cheering continue] 430 00:33:21,582 --> 00:33:23,209 [no audible dialogue] 431 00:33:31,467 --> 00:33:35,471 Maybe she heard about my dad and decided to do it to herself too. 432 00:33:35,471 --> 00:33:38,057 But she called me on her way here. She checked herself in. 433 00:33:38,057 --> 00:33:40,435 - She said she was scared. - Yes. That's what Admissions said. 434 00:33:40,435 --> 00:33:44,397 Well, I tried to see her, but she doesn't want to see me or anyone. Just you. 435 00:33:44,397 --> 00:33:47,817 Merritt, how are you? Both parents in extreme crisis. 436 00:33:47,817 --> 00:33:49,527 This is a lot to handle. 437 00:33:49,527 --> 00:33:52,196 Dr. Witticomb, I'm okay. 438 00:33:52,196 --> 00:33:55,450 I just need you to figure out what's happening to her. Please. 439 00:34:08,963 --> 00:34:10,590 I think I'm dead. 440 00:34:12,050 --> 00:34:13,217 Really dead. 441 00:34:14,761 --> 00:34:15,970 [Dr. Witticomb] Literally dead? 442 00:34:17,889 --> 00:34:20,224 You're the only person I trust to confirm it. 443 00:34:21,684 --> 00:34:24,604 The nurses let me see my blood pressure and my pulse, 444 00:34:24,604 --> 00:34:26,731 but I didn't believe it. 445 00:34:26,731 --> 00:34:28,483 What happened, Lois? 446 00:34:29,609 --> 00:34:32,153 It all came together. A shock. 447 00:34:34,405 --> 00:34:36,199 The world is not real. 448 00:34:38,576 --> 00:34:40,369 And I've crossed over. 449 00:34:44,332 --> 00:34:48,836 I thought about cutting my carotid with a pair of poultry shears. 450 00:34:48,836 --> 00:34:50,379 But you didn't. 451 00:34:51,047 --> 00:34:52,590 So that's good. 452 00:34:53,382 --> 00:34:54,842 What started it? 453 00:34:54,842 --> 00:34:57,970 I realized I never really woke up from that coma. 454 00:34:58,596 --> 00:34:59,972 Did I? 455 00:35:01,349 --> 00:35:04,811 I am in some other world. 456 00:35:06,729 --> 00:35:08,022 The other world? 457 00:35:09,107 --> 00:35:13,027 And you think I'm not real either? I've accompanied you here? 458 00:35:13,027 --> 00:35:14,529 Maybe to take you back? 459 00:35:15,988 --> 00:35:18,157 You are very much alive. Listen to me. 460 00:35:18,157 --> 00:35:20,159 There's a neuropsychiatric condition, 461 00:35:20,159 --> 00:35:21,953 Cotard's syndrome, 462 00:35:21,953 --> 00:35:25,331 and what it is, is you just simply think you're dead, 463 00:35:25,331 --> 00:35:29,293 or your organs are putrefying, or the world is an illusion, 464 00:35:29,293 --> 00:35:32,046 but mostly you're dead. 465 00:35:33,422 --> 00:35:37,093 It is a reaction to going through too much to bear. 466 00:35:38,970 --> 00:35:42,098 Listen. Stay with me. What triggered it? 467 00:35:43,224 --> 00:35:44,892 The first thing... 468 00:35:48,271 --> 00:35:51,149 It was-- I couldn't believe it. 469 00:35:51,149 --> 00:35:52,650 Marshall asked me 470 00:35:52,650 --> 00:35:56,737 to be a part of some sort of ménage with him and his girlfriend. 471 00:35:57,488 --> 00:35:59,157 Utterly surreal. 472 00:36:00,658 --> 00:36:02,618 I'm very fluid. 473 00:36:04,370 --> 00:36:06,164 But it's the new paradigm. 474 00:36:06,164 --> 00:36:09,584 The man I knew would have never done that. Nor would Redd. 475 00:36:09,584 --> 00:36:11,127 It's the other world. 476 00:36:11,127 --> 00:36:15,506 A kind of hell made up of sick jokes so elaborate... 477 00:36:15,506 --> 00:36:17,133 [scoffs] 478 00:36:17,133 --> 00:36:19,051 ...nothing living could construct them. 479 00:36:19,051 --> 00:36:22,430 And what else? What else made you think you were dead? 480 00:36:22,430 --> 00:36:23,848 My doctor. 481 00:36:24,932 --> 00:36:26,851 Dr. Charles Mayhew. 482 00:36:28,769 --> 00:36:30,021 [chuckles] 483 00:36:30,897 --> 00:36:34,358 He was having orgies in my room. 484 00:36:34,358 --> 00:36:37,820 - [moaning] - [Lois] I could hear it. 485 00:36:37,820 --> 00:36:41,324 I even saw some of it through the curtains around my bed, 486 00:36:41,324 --> 00:36:43,367 like flashes of a nightmare. 487 00:36:43,367 --> 00:36:46,871 My doctor, a supposed man of virtue, 488 00:36:46,871 --> 00:36:49,498 was also an agent of chaos. 489 00:36:49,498 --> 00:36:51,292 So I confronted him. 490 00:36:52,543 --> 00:36:54,086 Having sex parties? 491 00:36:54,962 --> 00:36:57,673 These are exactly the kinds of tricks that our mind plays on us 492 00:36:57,673 --> 00:36:59,425 when we emerge from these coma states. 493 00:36:59,425 --> 00:37:04,263 There are many different hallucinatory electrical storms that can occur. 494 00:37:04,263 --> 00:37:08,434 I mean, certainly you don't actually believe that I'm having orgies in here? 495 00:37:08,434 --> 00:37:10,561 Yes, I fuckin' do. 496 00:37:11,562 --> 00:37:13,522 I do believe it. Mm-hmm. 497 00:37:13,522 --> 00:37:18,653 You know why? Because you are not who or what you say you are. 498 00:37:18,653 --> 00:37:21,948 - It's some sort of demonic rite... - I really wish that you understood 499 00:37:21,948 --> 00:37:23,991 how even the suggestion of impropriety 500 00:37:23,991 --> 00:37:25,910 would not be good for me in this day and age. 501 00:37:25,910 --> 00:37:27,495 Even if nobody believed you, 502 00:37:27,495 --> 00:37:29,163 which, for the record, they won't. 503 00:37:29,163 --> 00:37:31,082 Nobody will. They simply won't. 504 00:37:31,082 --> 00:37:32,875 I fucking saved your life. 505 00:37:37,088 --> 00:37:39,465 I know what I heard. 506 00:37:40,341 --> 00:37:41,717 I heard it. 507 00:37:41,717 --> 00:37:42,802 Mmm. 508 00:37:42,802 --> 00:37:45,805 I also recall, in my coma state, 509 00:37:45,805 --> 00:37:47,723 a story about a young girl 510 00:37:47,723 --> 00:37:51,269 who got impregnated against her will 511 00:37:51,269 --> 00:37:54,188 while she was unconscious. 512 00:37:54,188 --> 00:37:56,357 - You did that, didn't you? You did it. - Um... 513 00:37:56,357 --> 00:37:59,902 So, fuck you. And I never did any of those vile things. 514 00:37:59,902 --> 00:38:02,738 In fact, I'm the one who saved your life. Um... 515 00:38:05,074 --> 00:38:07,285 God, I feel so fucking sorry for your husband. 516 00:38:08,577 --> 00:38:10,997 You're an impossible woman. You're insufferable, 517 00:38:10,997 --> 00:38:15,459 and you're so judgmental of him and me and I'm assuming all men. 518 00:38:15,459 --> 00:38:18,546 You are corrosive to your fucking core, Lois. 519 00:38:19,463 --> 00:38:22,258 Multiple times, your husband came up to me, 520 00:38:22,258 --> 00:38:24,677 and he said something to the effect of, 521 00:38:24,677 --> 00:38:28,222 "Hey, you know, just between you and me, couldn't you accidentally bump the switch, 522 00:38:28,222 --> 00:38:30,224 turn off the machine that's keeping her alive 523 00:38:30,224 --> 00:38:32,101 and send the old vegetable up to heaven?" 524 00:38:32,101 --> 00:38:34,145 I always thought the guy was fucking with me, 525 00:38:34,145 --> 00:38:37,815 but now I realize that he was so insistent on wanting you to fucking die 526 00:38:37,815 --> 00:38:40,776 because you are such a massive fucking bitch. 527 00:38:41,694 --> 00:38:45,948 I see now very clearly that you would not have ascended into heaven, 528 00:38:45,948 --> 00:38:47,908 but, rather, descended into hell, 529 00:38:47,908 --> 00:38:51,162 because it is a place that you create for yourself 530 00:38:51,162 --> 00:38:53,164 every day and every hour 531 00:38:53,164 --> 00:38:56,876 with your arrogance and your confident false superiority. 532 00:38:56,876 --> 00:39:00,212 It is a hell of your own making in which you burn yourself 533 00:39:00,212 --> 00:39:04,592 and everyone else who you come into contact with. 534 00:39:04,592 --> 00:39:07,845 This is not the real world. 535 00:39:07,845 --> 00:39:09,388 This is the other world. 536 00:39:09,388 --> 00:39:12,183 And I-- I am dead. 537 00:39:13,768 --> 00:39:15,603 And he's right. 538 00:39:18,439 --> 00:39:23,319 I created this hell I am in somehow. 539 00:39:24,362 --> 00:39:26,864 Lois, I promise you, this is temporary. 540 00:39:26,864 --> 00:39:29,033 Please trust me. 541 00:39:30,368 --> 00:39:34,872 Tell me, what else convinced you you were in the other world? 542 00:39:36,165 --> 00:39:38,793 The only reason I can confess 543 00:39:40,669 --> 00:39:42,463 is 'cause I'm dead. 544 00:39:42,463 --> 00:39:44,256 I killed someone. 545 00:39:47,635 --> 00:39:50,513 A terrible man. Beating women. 546 00:39:50,513 --> 00:39:54,016 Megan. The one who has my job. Her man. 547 00:39:54,683 --> 00:39:56,477 In cold blood. 548 00:39:57,395 --> 00:39:58,687 An execution really. 549 00:39:58,687 --> 00:40:00,189 - [gunshot] - [body thuds] 550 00:40:01,649 --> 00:40:04,610 [Dr. Witticomb] Where's the body, Lois? Did you dispose of it? 551 00:40:04,610 --> 00:40:09,281 See? See, this is what I'm saying. This is where it gets strange. And odd. 552 00:40:09,281 --> 00:40:12,034 Okay, I left the scene. I told Megan I would take care of it, 553 00:40:12,034 --> 00:40:15,621 'cause I needed to get my head together. I needed to get supplies and stuff. 554 00:40:15,621 --> 00:40:19,625 - Supplies? - Yes. Um, shovel, trash bag, lime. 555 00:40:19,625 --> 00:40:21,502 I wasn't in my right mind. 556 00:40:21,502 --> 00:40:23,629 I was so stunned, I lost track of time. 557 00:40:23,629 --> 00:40:27,091 I don't even know how long I had been driving. 558 00:40:27,091 --> 00:40:30,302 And then I got my shit together, and I said, "No. No, no, no. 559 00:40:30,302 --> 00:40:34,473 You are not going to cover this up," because this was self-defense. 560 00:40:34,473 --> 00:40:38,185 This was a bad man. Another bad man. 561 00:40:38,185 --> 00:40:42,815 I said, "Let me get my shit together and go back and face what I have done." 562 00:40:42,815 --> 00:40:44,150 And? 563 00:40:46,569 --> 00:40:49,029 Megan was gone. The body was gone. 564 00:40:49,029 --> 00:40:51,490 The entire room was scrubbed clean. 565 00:40:51,490 --> 00:40:52,700 No body, no crime. 566 00:40:52,700 --> 00:40:57,121 And I'm thinking, "The cleaners have been here, and they covered all this up." 567 00:40:57,121 --> 00:40:58,414 The cleaners? 568 00:40:58,414 --> 00:41:01,917 People who specialize in the art of the cover-up. 569 00:41:01,917 --> 00:41:04,962 Erasing traces of blood, viscera, brain smear, what have you. 570 00:41:04,962 --> 00:41:08,132 - [Dr. Witticomb] Such as? - The best one I know in the vicinity 571 00:41:08,132 --> 00:41:11,677 is Glorious McKall. I mean, she's-- she was an acquaintance. 572 00:41:11,677 --> 00:41:13,179 So what did you do? 573 00:41:16,849 --> 00:41:18,642 I went silent. 574 00:41:19,268 --> 00:41:20,394 I went deep. 575 00:41:20,394 --> 00:41:24,190 I followed Megan in my car, and guess what I found. 576 00:41:24,190 --> 00:41:26,400 - [Dr. Witticomb] Hmm? - [Lois] Proof. 577 00:41:36,160 --> 00:41:37,703 And I confronted her ass. 578 00:41:39,038 --> 00:41:40,539 What are you looking at? 579 00:41:42,166 --> 00:41:45,211 I got you, you sneaky bitch. Oh, yes. 580 00:41:45,211 --> 00:41:47,338 Lois, what's going on? You seem-- 581 00:41:47,338 --> 00:41:50,299 Unhinged? Ding, ding, ding. 582 00:41:56,597 --> 00:41:59,558 I killed him to help you out. 583 00:41:59,558 --> 00:42:01,810 Then you move the body, you cleaned up my mess, 584 00:42:01,810 --> 00:42:04,188 and you don't say anything? 585 00:42:06,398 --> 00:42:08,275 Glorious McKall would do that. 586 00:42:08,275 --> 00:42:11,654 She would take her victims and grind them up and feed them to her hogs. 587 00:42:11,654 --> 00:42:13,489 Is that what you had her do? 588 00:42:13,489 --> 00:42:15,783 Lois, sit down. 589 00:42:18,118 --> 00:42:20,246 I don't know what you're talking about. 590 00:42:20,246 --> 00:42:22,206 I saw you with her. 591 00:42:22,206 --> 00:42:24,542 - With who? - Glorious McKall. 592 00:42:24,542 --> 00:42:27,711 I saw you talking to her, getting her to clean up my mess. 593 00:42:27,711 --> 00:42:31,257 What I want to know is why you didn't say anything. Why? 594 00:42:31,257 --> 00:42:34,927 Lois, I did meet with Glorious-- to help her. 595 00:42:34,927 --> 00:42:37,179 A member of her crew was having a fentanyl moment. 596 00:42:37,179 --> 00:42:39,807 She was very emotional about it. This man was like her son. 597 00:42:39,807 --> 00:42:43,143 I've known her for several cases, so I met with her. I offered resources. 598 00:42:43,143 --> 00:42:44,687 That's what you saw. 599 00:42:44,687 --> 00:42:46,021 Where's the body? 600 00:42:46,021 --> 00:42:47,940 Where's your man? 601 00:42:47,940 --> 00:42:49,775 - My man? - Justin. 602 00:42:49,775 --> 00:42:53,279 I haven't seen him in weeks. I don't know. 603 00:42:54,154 --> 00:42:55,531 Lois, listen to me. 604 00:42:56,407 --> 00:42:58,367 You're messed up. 605 00:42:59,201 --> 00:43:00,703 You need help. 606 00:43:01,954 --> 00:43:02,955 Let me help you. 607 00:43:05,124 --> 00:43:08,294 She said I needed sleep, care. 608 00:43:10,629 --> 00:43:13,757 As if I could accept that anymore. 609 00:43:13,757 --> 00:43:15,259 [chuckles] 610 00:43:16,385 --> 00:43:19,888 In that moment, the chaos and the madness, 611 00:43:19,888 --> 00:43:21,599 it all flashed together, 612 00:43:21,599 --> 00:43:23,684 and I realized... 613 00:43:26,895 --> 00:43:28,397 I have crossed over. 614 00:43:28,981 --> 00:43:29,982 I... 615 00:43:29,982 --> 00:43:31,609 I'm in the place 616 00:43:33,235 --> 00:43:36,822 that you go to in the afterlife, 617 00:43:36,822 --> 00:43:40,242 and I'm being forced to live in my sorrow, 618 00:43:41,076 --> 00:43:44,413 my misdeeds and my wreckage. 619 00:43:46,206 --> 00:43:47,541 This... 620 00:43:47,541 --> 00:43:52,546 This is my hell I am forced to live in, 621 00:43:52,546 --> 00:43:57,635 and you-- you are just a clever demon, 622 00:43:57,635 --> 00:44:00,346 who is sent to torture me with comfort. 623 00:44:00,346 --> 00:44:01,513 Lois, 624 00:44:02,222 --> 00:44:03,599 that's not true. 625 00:44:03,599 --> 00:44:05,934 I care about you, your well-being, 626 00:44:05,934 --> 00:44:08,479 and I think you know that to be true. 627 00:44:22,618 --> 00:44:24,787 And then there's the final reason 628 00:44:24,787 --> 00:44:28,082 that I have a hard time accepting 629 00:44:28,082 --> 00:44:31,001 that I'm back in any kind of literal reality. 630 00:44:31,001 --> 00:44:34,797 It's the last piece of the jigsaw puzzle. 631 00:44:35,547 --> 00:44:39,385 The piece right in the center, connected to everything else? 632 00:44:39,385 --> 00:44:43,681 That's the middle piece. Goes in the center. It connects everything. 633 00:44:45,974 --> 00:44:48,143 You don't miss a detail, do you? 634 00:44:48,644 --> 00:44:52,439 There was a quintuple homicide, all under one roof. 635 00:44:52,439 --> 00:44:54,566 A whole family. 636 00:44:54,566 --> 00:44:58,320 The mother. The father. The baby. 637 00:44:58,946 --> 00:45:00,906 The damn pot on the stove. 638 00:45:01,949 --> 00:45:04,618 Just like my dream. It happened. 639 00:45:04,618 --> 00:45:06,620 Where did it happen? Was it local? 640 00:45:06,620 --> 00:45:08,789 I didn't read about it in the news or online. 641 00:45:08,789 --> 00:45:11,291 Media blackout. Procedure. 642 00:45:11,291 --> 00:45:13,043 Lois, what are you getting at? 643 00:45:16,255 --> 00:45:18,340 A copycat killer, 644 00:45:18,841 --> 00:45:20,426 who copied my dreams. 645 00:45:21,176 --> 00:45:25,013 And the only person who could have done that 646 00:45:26,724 --> 00:45:28,308 has access to my files. 647 00:45:29,393 --> 00:45:31,812 You know what the fuck I'm getting at. 648 00:45:37,192 --> 00:45:38,527 [chuckles] 649 00:45:39,528 --> 00:45:41,321 Lois, 650 00:45:41,321 --> 00:45:43,407 you're a singular and unique case. 651 00:45:43,407 --> 00:45:46,452 The interviews we did following your emergence from the coma state, 652 00:45:46,452 --> 00:45:48,871 these recordings, they are immensely valuable resources 653 00:45:48,871 --> 00:45:52,541 to those in neuroscience, neurocognition, philosophy. 654 00:45:52,541 --> 00:45:57,212 I told you this when we began. You signed. Your entire family signed waivers 655 00:45:57,212 --> 00:46:00,924 giving us permission to record and document this process 656 00:46:00,924 --> 00:46:05,345 and share them internally for scientific research purposes. 657 00:46:05,345 --> 00:46:09,224 How many people, Doctor, 658 00:46:09,224 --> 00:46:11,226 have access to my file? 659 00:46:13,145 --> 00:46:14,480 - Who? - Hundreds. 660 00:46:14,480 --> 00:46:16,857 - How many people? - Your daughter, for one. 661 00:46:16,857 --> 00:46:19,735 A medical professional with access to the medi platform. 662 00:46:19,735 --> 00:46:22,613 Anybody who has access to your computer or your passwords. 663 00:46:22,613 --> 00:46:25,866 Your husband could be a suspect. We could write an exhaustive list. 664 00:46:25,866 --> 00:46:28,994 But there's another more likely suspect, no? 665 00:46:29,995 --> 00:46:31,330 Someone-- 666 00:46:32,039 --> 00:46:35,751 Somebody who knows these grotesqueries better than anyone. 667 00:46:37,085 --> 00:46:38,295 You. 668 00:46:39,588 --> 00:46:42,591 You just said moments ago that you murdered a man 669 00:46:42,591 --> 00:46:44,343 in cold blood, execution-style. 670 00:46:44,343 --> 00:46:48,013 We are talking about a person that killed a baby. 671 00:46:48,597 --> 00:46:50,265 You think I'm capable of that? 672 00:46:50,265 --> 00:46:55,062 Let's examine this like a detective, rationally, scientifically, logically. 673 00:46:55,062 --> 00:47:01,109 You recount losing time, disassociating, seeing things that aren't there. 674 00:47:01,902 --> 00:47:05,614 You spent years denying how sick your job made you. 675 00:47:05,614 --> 00:47:07,032 I've seen your cases. 676 00:47:07,032 --> 00:47:10,786 A woman in a world of crime and killers trying, almost by herself, 677 00:47:10,786 --> 00:47:14,122 to manifest justice all alone? 678 00:47:16,291 --> 00:47:18,877 Is not that the motive of grotesquerie? 679 00:47:18,877 --> 00:47:21,964 Is he not a machination of your own mind? 680 00:47:21,964 --> 00:47:23,423 Didn't you murder that-- 681 00:47:23,423 --> 00:47:24,591 Stop. 682 00:47:29,513 --> 00:47:31,098 I am still in it. 683 00:47:33,267 --> 00:47:36,019 I am still in a coma. 684 00:47:36,854 --> 00:47:39,982 Stuck in an endless circle. 685 00:47:41,817 --> 00:47:43,569 There is established wisdom in my field: 686 00:47:43,569 --> 00:47:47,197 "Do not tell a delusional person they are living in a delusion." 687 00:47:47,823 --> 00:47:49,867 But I'm gonna level with you, Lois. 688 00:47:51,702 --> 00:47:53,412 I don't think you murdered that family. 689 00:47:53,412 --> 00:47:55,831 I don't think there was a quintuple murder. 690 00:47:55,831 --> 00:47:57,916 You are awake. The world is real. 691 00:47:57,916 --> 00:48:00,752 But you are hearing and seeing things that are not. 692 00:48:00,752 --> 00:48:04,965 If it's all in my head, why all the religious imagery? 693 00:48:04,965 --> 00:48:07,926 Because you convinced yourself you're the last good person in the world, 694 00:48:07,926 --> 00:48:12,055 a cross between a saint, a crusader, a holy warrior, a prophet, 695 00:48:12,055 --> 00:48:14,892 when all you are-- all you were-- 696 00:48:14,892 --> 00:48:20,939 in reality, is a small-town detective in a very, very dark time. 697 00:48:26,695 --> 00:48:28,697 I'm gonna go to my room now. 698 00:48:30,157 --> 00:48:31,158 Thank you. 699 00:49:17,788 --> 00:49:19,790 [door buzzing] 700 00:49:24,836 --> 00:49:25,921 [buzzing stops] 701 00:49:28,423 --> 00:49:30,133 [keys jingling] 702 00:49:33,512 --> 00:49:34,721 [door unlocks] 703 00:49:53,073 --> 00:49:54,950 [Megan sobs] 704 00:50:06,086 --> 00:50:07,921 [crying] 705 00:50:16,930 --> 00:50:18,807 [footsteps approaching] 706 00:50:18,807 --> 00:50:22,728 [Chief Megan] Again, I need to apologize for falling apart back there 707 00:50:22,728 --> 00:50:24,396 where you were getting care. 708 00:50:24,396 --> 00:50:26,857 And I hate myself for coming to you and asking for help 709 00:50:26,857 --> 00:50:29,651 when you're clearly in the middle of a mental health crisis. 710 00:50:31,319 --> 00:50:33,155 Then why did you? 711 00:50:35,949 --> 00:50:38,326 When they called me to this crime scene-- 712 00:50:39,953 --> 00:50:41,913 Sorry. It's a lot. It's worse for me 713 00:50:41,913 --> 00:50:45,083 even than the recent family murder with remains in a boiling pot. 714 00:50:45,083 --> 00:50:47,169 Worse how? 715 00:50:47,169 --> 00:50:49,296 - It's-- - I've been here before. 716 00:50:50,464 --> 00:50:54,217 It's bigger. It's more calculated. 717 00:50:54,217 --> 00:50:57,554 It's immense in its scope. Beyond me, I think. 718 00:50:57,554 --> 00:51:00,182 And because I know some of these people slaughtered. 719 00:51:02,809 --> 00:51:04,019 Lois. 720 00:51:05,312 --> 00:51:06,521 You-- 721 00:51:06,521 --> 00:51:08,023 You know some of them too. 722 00:51:13,070 --> 00:51:14,071 I'm done. 723 00:51:15,906 --> 00:51:17,032 I'm done. 724 00:51:17,032 --> 00:51:19,910 Lois. Lois. Please. We need you. 725 00:51:20,702 --> 00:51:21,703 I need you. 726 00:51:21,703 --> 00:51:23,246 None of this is real anyway. 727 00:51:23,246 --> 00:51:25,540 Lois, it is real. It is real. 728 00:51:25,540 --> 00:51:27,000 I promise. 729 00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:30,212 What's here is-is evil. 730 00:51:30,212 --> 00:51:32,631 Do I believe in the devil? No, I do not. 731 00:51:32,631 --> 00:51:34,257 What I believe is here today... 732 00:51:34,257 --> 00:51:37,677 These astounding murders by Grotesquerie 733 00:51:37,677 --> 00:51:40,764 have been created by someone who understands 734 00:51:40,764 --> 00:51:44,142 that fear is what the devils who walk amongst us, 735 00:51:44,142 --> 00:51:49,189 the mortal devils we all know, created so we could stay in line. 736 00:51:52,442 --> 00:51:53,902 You are not dead. 737 00:51:55,654 --> 00:51:56,905 You are not dead. 738 00:51:57,989 --> 00:51:59,366 You here, right now. 739 00:51:59,366 --> 00:52:02,369 I promise you. I promise. I promise this is real. 740 00:52:04,412 --> 00:52:06,289 You did shoot my boyfriend. 741 00:52:07,082 --> 00:52:09,668 I did call Glorious McKall to get rid of the body. 742 00:52:09,668 --> 00:52:11,002 That happened. 743 00:52:11,753 --> 00:52:13,171 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 744 00:52:13,171 --> 00:52:14,381 I'm sorry. 745 00:52:15,173 --> 00:52:17,843 Why did you lie to me? 746 00:52:17,843 --> 00:52:20,387 Because I had to protect you from my mistake. 747 00:52:21,221 --> 00:52:23,849 [Lois sighs] 748 00:52:24,933 --> 00:52:26,101 [Chief Megan] Please. 749 00:52:27,227 --> 00:52:29,896 [Lois sighs deeply] 750 00:52:33,733 --> 00:52:34,734 Show me. 751 00:52:49,332 --> 00:52:53,503 [door opens, closes] 752 00:53:43,637 --> 00:53:45,764 The Jesus figure, he-- 753 00:53:47,349 --> 00:53:49,351 he touched me. 754 00:53:49,351 --> 00:53:50,685 My heart. 755 00:53:53,355 --> 00:53:54,856 He moved you? 756 00:53:56,608 --> 00:54:00,695 He literally touched my heart with defibrillator paddles. 757 00:54:01,321 --> 00:54:03,823 Shocked me back to life 758 00:54:03,823 --> 00:54:07,535 from a very dark sleep. 759 00:54:08,703 --> 00:54:10,622 Or so I thought. 760 00:54:14,209 --> 00:54:16,753 Who are the rest of these people? Homeless? 761 00:54:16,753 --> 00:54:18,296 Unhoused. 762 00:54:20,298 --> 00:54:23,718 I was only able to identify one other person, someone I knew vaguely. 763 00:54:24,511 --> 00:54:26,388 Mary Colsby. 764 00:54:26,388 --> 00:54:27,472 Who is she? 765 00:54:27,472 --> 00:54:28,932 [Chief Megan] She was many things. 766 00:54:28,932 --> 00:54:32,602 Most recently, the woman who accused your husband, Marshall, of assault. 767 00:54:36,648 --> 00:54:38,024 [sighs] 768 00:54:38,024 --> 00:54:39,609 My God. 769 00:54:44,155 --> 00:54:45,490 All right, people. 770 00:54:47,117 --> 00:54:50,161 Bag every piece of evidence. 771 00:54:50,161 --> 00:54:52,163 Print every surface. 772 00:54:52,163 --> 00:54:55,250 Do your jobs, and do them well. 773 00:54:55,250 --> 00:54:58,461 Meet me in my old office in one hour. 774 00:54:58,461 --> 00:54:59,671 You're gonna help us? 775 00:54:59,671 --> 00:55:02,132 Who else is gonna solve this case, Jack? Her? 776 00:55:02,132 --> 00:55:04,384 Lois, that's unkind and fucking unnecessary. 777 00:55:04,384 --> 00:55:06,761 And it's also the goddamn truth. 778 00:55:08,847 --> 00:55:12,225 And we need to start telling each other the truth, huh? 779 00:55:13,935 --> 00:55:15,729 Jack, I know who did this. 780 00:55:19,107 --> 00:55:20,442 One hour.