1
00:00:08,884 --> 00:00:10,511
Hey, Roman, are you sleeping?
2
00:00:11,679 --> 00:00:12,763
Yes.
3
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,057
Okay, cool.
4
00:00:15,766 --> 00:00:16,851
Hey, Roman?
5
00:00:17,768 --> 00:00:20,229
- What?
- Is the monster gone?
6
00:00:20,855 --> 00:00:23,691
We've talked
about this, okay?
7
00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:26,569
There is no monster!
8
00:00:28,654 --> 00:00:30,740
Why'd you scream? You scared me.
9
00:00:31,323 --> 00:00:35,077
I scared you?
Look, tha-- that's it, okay?
10
00:00:35,077 --> 00:00:37,788
I'm too old to be living with
a kid who believes in monsters.
11
00:00:38,289 --> 00:00:40,291
Remember what Gladys
at the dry cleaners said?
12
00:00:40,750 --> 00:00:42,209
That's the most ketchup
she's ever cleaned out
13
00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:43,335
of a young man's pants?
14
00:00:44,336 --> 00:00:46,422
Exactly. "A young man."
15
00:00:46,881 --> 00:00:48,507
And a young man,
needs his own room.
16
00:00:48,841 --> 00:00:50,551
N-- I'm talking to Mom and Dad.
17
00:00:56,265 --> 00:00:57,433
Well, that's new.
18
00:01:01,437 --> 00:01:03,397
Oh, hey, kid.
Is this the Russo house?
19
00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:05,316
What are you doing in my mirror?
20
00:01:05,316 --> 00:01:07,485
That's how we get places.
I'm a wizard.
21
00:01:07,777 --> 00:01:09,195
Where's your robe
and pointy hat?
22
00:01:09,653 --> 00:01:12,323
Let me clarify.
I'm a wizard with style.
23
00:01:18,329 --> 00:01:20,039
Billie, we can't go in that way.
24
00:01:21,332 --> 00:01:23,042
Wait! Who else is in there?
25
00:01:23,959 --> 00:01:25,377
Should I be changing
in the bathroom?
26
00:01:26,921 --> 00:01:28,714
- Okay, Milo.
- Roman.
27
00:01:28,714 --> 00:01:30,174
There's something
I gotta tell you.
28
00:01:30,174 --> 00:01:33,719
Me first, okay?
Maybe I flew off the handle.
29
00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:35,513
Not gonna move out.
30
00:01:35,513 --> 00:01:38,891
But promise me,
no more crazy made-up stories.
31
00:01:38,891 --> 00:01:43,229
- There's a wizard in our mirror!
- Dad, I need my own room!
32
00:01:46,941 --> 00:01:49,860
{\an8}♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪
33
00:01:49,860 --> 00:01:51,737
{\an8}♪ When you can
have what you want ♪
34
00:01:51,737 --> 00:01:53,489
{\an8}♪ By the simplest of means ♪
35
00:01:53,697 --> 00:01:56,659
{\an8}♪ Be careful not to mess
with the balance of things ♪
36
00:01:56,659 --> 00:02:01,288
{\an8}♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
37
00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:03,415
♪ You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes ♪
38
00:02:03,415 --> 00:02:06,293
♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
39
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:08,087
♪ Yes, please ♪
40
00:02:10,089 --> 00:02:11,799
♪ What it seems ♪
41
00:02:18,222 --> 00:02:20,099
{\an8}Oh! Hey there, good looking.
42
00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:22,560
Why, yes.
43
00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:26,355
{\an8}It is my birthday today.
Yeah, 34.
44
00:02:29,608 --> 00:02:31,777
Oh, you think the J-Man's
still got it?
45
00:02:32,528 --> 00:02:35,906
{\an8}I think you still got it.
Giada.
46
00:02:35,906 --> 00:02:38,242
You're awake. That's fun.
47
00:02:39,785 --> 00:02:41,328
Happy birthday, J-Man.
48
00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:43,914
You remembered my birthday.
49
00:02:43,914 --> 00:02:45,040
{\an8}How could I forget?
50
00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:47,126
{\an8}You sent me
four calendar invites.
51
00:02:48,043 --> 00:02:50,087
{\an8}Well, you do know that
coordinating family logistics
52
00:02:50,087 --> 00:02:51,922
{\an8}is my love language.
53
00:02:52,464 --> 00:02:54,967
Gross! Get a room!
54
00:02:55,551 --> 00:02:56,719
This is our room.
55
00:02:58,012 --> 00:03:00,264
Hey, guys! Anything
you wanna say to me today?
56
00:03:00,264 --> 00:03:03,309
Oh, thank you for asking.
I need my own room.
57
00:03:03,809 --> 00:03:06,395
No, like anything
you want to, uh, wish me?
58
00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:09,315
I wish you would give me
my own room.
59
00:03:11,275 --> 00:03:13,235
{\an8}Look what I woke up
to this morning.
60
00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:15,237
{\an8}It's so the monster
in the closet will think
61
00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:17,197
{\an8}I'm a monster
and go after Roman.
62
00:03:17,948 --> 00:03:19,783
Savage. Gets that from my side.
63
00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:24,079
{\an8}Mom, don't encourage him.
You should be telling him
64
00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:25,748
{\an8}there's no such thing
as monsters.
65
00:03:25,998 --> 00:03:27,291
{\an8}Back me up on this, Dad.
66
00:03:27,291 --> 00:03:28,626
{\an8}Absolutely, buddy.
67
00:03:28,626 --> 00:03:30,669
{\an8}There is no such thing
as monsters.
68
00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:32,171
{\an8}And I should know,
'cause I was not
69
00:03:32,171 --> 00:03:33,547
{\an8}a monster hunter
when I was your age.
70
00:03:34,006 --> 00:03:35,257
{\an8}You were a monster hunter?
71
00:03:35,257 --> 00:03:38,302
{\an8}No! No, I was very clear
when I said I was not
72
00:03:38,302 --> 00:03:40,262
{\an8}a monster hunter, okay?
I couldn't have been,
73
00:03:40,262 --> 00:03:41,347
because I'm not a wizard.
74
00:03:42,806 --> 00:03:44,016
What are we even talking about?
75
00:03:45,643 --> 00:03:49,313
Is Dad having a midlife crisis?
Are you getting a tattoo?
76
00:03:49,605 --> 00:03:50,648
Ooh, are you?
77
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:53,233
- No, and I am not midlife--
- M'kay.
78
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:54,860
Guys, I turned 34 today.
79
00:03:55,110 --> 00:03:56,111
It's your birthday?
80
00:03:57,613 --> 00:03:58,447
Be honest with me, does no one
check the family calendar?
81
00:03:59,907 --> 00:04:02,159
We all love the calendar,
big fans of the calendar. Okay.
82
00:04:02,159 --> 00:04:05,120
Boys, go get dressed.
I think your dad needs a moment.
83
00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:08,624
Listen, don't freak out,
84
00:04:08,624 --> 00:04:09,792
but I got you a little surprise
for your birthday.
85
00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:11,752
But... I don't like surprises.
86
00:04:11,961 --> 00:04:13,128
Oh, you're gonna like this one.
87
00:04:14,672 --> 00:04:16,590
Okay, I can handle this.
Maybe liking surprises
88
00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:18,467
will be a new thing for me.
Yeah, yeah.
89
00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:20,469
Oh, who am I kidding? Giada!
90
00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:26,475
Let's just go in this way.
91
00:04:27,810 --> 00:04:28,727
No,
we have to use the front door.
92
00:04:30,187 --> 00:04:32,189
Like a mortal?
Aw, man, nobody better see me.
93
00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:38,988
Giada! Hey, um, uh, yeah...
94
00:04:39,530 --> 00:04:42,074
Giada, why-- why don't
you tell me what it is, okay?
95
00:04:42,074 --> 00:04:43,492
And you'll be like, "Surprise!"
96
00:04:43,492 --> 00:04:46,078
And then I'll be like,
"No freaking way!"
97
00:04:46,078 --> 00:04:48,080
Gia-- Huh?
98
00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:53,419
Look who's using the front door
just like one of you people.
99
00:04:55,546 --> 00:04:56,547
Surprise!
100
00:05:02,177 --> 00:05:03,595
No freaking way.
101
00:05:04,138 --> 00:05:06,598
I know,
I look fantastic, don't I?
102
00:05:07,850 --> 00:05:09,935
Alex, [stammers] are you
here for my birthday?
103
00:05:10,436 --> 00:05:13,856
It's your... It-- uh... It's
your birthday! That's why...
104
00:05:13,856 --> 00:05:15,357
That's why I came, you know?
Aw.
105
00:05:15,357 --> 00:05:17,067
That's why we're here.
We came for your birthday.
106
00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:21,488
You dragged me here
for your brother's birthday?
107
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:22,865
No, I brought you here,
108
00:05:22,865 --> 00:05:24,533
so you can meet your
new wizard teacher.
109
00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:27,244
I don't need a new teacher.
They never believe in me anyway.
110
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:30,456
Well, this one will.
He's the best I've ever known.
111
00:05:30,456 --> 00:05:32,166
Annoyingly. But...
112
00:05:32,499 --> 00:05:33,917
I just have
to find a way to ask him.
113
00:05:33,917 --> 00:05:35,419
He can be a little high-strung.
114
00:05:35,627 --> 00:05:37,004
Did you guys track this dirt in?
115
00:05:40,132 --> 00:05:41,633
Okay, a lot high-strung.
116
00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:46,305
So, you're the guy who owns
all the sandwich shops?
117
00:05:46,305 --> 00:05:47,389
Like, the billionaire?
118
00:05:47,639 --> 00:05:49,475
Uh, no. That would be Max.
119
00:05:49,475 --> 00:05:51,185
I'm a middle school
vice principal, which some
120
00:05:51,185 --> 00:05:53,395
would say is much cooler
than being a billionaire.
121
00:05:53,395 --> 00:05:54,813
- Nobody says that.
- I would never say that.
122
00:05:56,815 --> 00:05:58,984
Uh, and Alex, who is this?
123
00:05:59,276 --> 00:06:02,988
Oh, um, this is Billie.
She's... with me.
124
00:06:03,739 --> 00:06:05,574
Well, that clears everything up.
125
00:06:07,201 --> 00:06:09,578
- Aunt Alex!
- Oh, my gosh! Hi, guys!
126
00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:12,623
How are you?
I bought you presents.
127
00:06:12,623 --> 00:06:14,166
Because I'm the coolest aunt,
like ever.
128
00:06:14,166 --> 00:06:15,667
Oh! Shirts.
- So...
129
00:06:16,835 --> 00:06:18,545
Straight outta WizTech.
- Alex.
130
00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:20,547
Can I speak with you in private?
131
00:06:24,259 --> 00:06:26,220
That's the wizard girl
from our mirror.
132
00:06:26,595 --> 00:06:27,721
Dude, you're gonna
weird her out.
133
00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:29,598
Hey, what kind of mileage
does this thing get?
134
00:06:32,351 --> 00:06:34,061
Okay, maybe
she's gonna weird us out.
135
00:06:36,438 --> 00:06:37,648
Uh, what are these?
136
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:39,858
Uh, hilarious novelty tees.
137
00:06:41,193 --> 00:06:42,319
About wizards.
138
00:06:42,319 --> 00:06:45,864
Well, we are wizards.
139
00:06:45,864 --> 00:06:47,908
Okay, we're talking
over here now.
140
00:06:49,493 --> 00:06:51,328
Remember how
the last time we talked,
141
00:06:51,620 --> 00:06:53,539
you asked me when I was going
to tell Giada and the kids
142
00:06:53,539 --> 00:06:55,082
that I was from
a family of wizards?
143
00:06:55,457 --> 00:06:58,377
- Yeah.
- Well, I kinda sort of haven't.
144
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:01,380
You're still lying
to your family, Justin? I'm...
145
00:07:02,256 --> 00:07:03,382
I'm so proud of you.
146
00:07:05,134 --> 00:07:07,511
I'm not lying, Alex.
Technically, I'm not a wizard.
147
00:07:07,511 --> 00:07:09,721
Okay? Anymore.
I haven't picked up a wand
148
00:07:09,721 --> 00:07:10,973
since I got fired from WizTech.
149
00:07:11,390 --> 00:07:13,308
Oh... Yeah.
The unicorn incident.
150
00:07:13,308 --> 00:07:15,144
- That was hilarious-- Awful.
- Awful!
151
00:07:15,144 --> 00:07:17,688
It was so awful.
That's what I was trying to say.
152
00:07:18,021 --> 00:07:22,151
Uh, but don't you miss it?
You know, teaching wizards?
153
00:07:22,901 --> 00:07:25,863
No. I don't even
think about it every day.
154
00:07:27,990 --> 00:07:29,783
- You just said every day.
- Yes, I didn't.
155
00:07:32,494 --> 00:07:34,454
Look, okay?
Just while you're here,
156
00:07:34,872 --> 00:07:37,624
no talk about magic
and no wizard talk, okay?
157
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:41,461
Fine. What exactly does your
family think I do for a living?
158
00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:42,838
Professional dog walker.
159
00:07:45,591 --> 00:07:48,218
I want to be offended, but I do
love dogs, so...
160
00:07:49,052 --> 00:07:50,637
All right, fine.
I won't blow your cover.
161
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:53,390
Thank you. And what
about Billie? Is she cool?
162
00:07:53,390 --> 00:07:54,516
I promise.
163
00:07:56,059 --> 00:07:57,477
Billie definitely won't say
anything about being a wizard.
164
00:07:57,769 --> 00:07:58,812
I'm a wizard!
165
00:08:01,231 --> 00:08:03,942
- I told you.
- Milo, she's not a wizard.
166
00:08:04,234 --> 00:08:05,485
I know you didn't just say that.
167
00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:07,571
There's no
such thing as wizards.
168
00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:09,156
And I know
you did not just say that.
169
00:08:10,324 --> 00:08:12,075
It's not personal.
He doesn't believe me
170
00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:13,827
about the monster
in our closet either.
171
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:15,495
Uh--
Because monsters aren't real,
172
00:08:15,871 --> 00:08:17,247
just like wizards aren't real.
173
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:19,499
Okay, smart guy,
show me your closet then.
174
00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:22,419
Fine, but all that's
gonna prove is that I have
175
00:08:22,419 --> 00:08:23,712
great taste in cardigans.
176
00:08:27,299 --> 00:08:29,676
There it is. There's the closet.
177
00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:30,886
Open it up.
178
00:08:30,886 --> 00:08:33,347
This is your dumb thing.
You open it.
179
00:08:33,347 --> 00:08:36,225
I'm not opening it.
I like being alive.
180
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:39,186
Well, guess you're both
too scared to open it.
181
00:08:39,436 --> 00:08:41,438
I am.
Thought I was clear about that.
182
00:08:42,606 --> 00:08:43,941
Hey, fine, I'll open it.
183
00:08:45,943 --> 00:08:47,319
From the place
where dark beasts dwell,
184
00:08:47,778 --> 00:08:49,529
I summon a floogie
with this spell.
185
00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:53,158
Get ready to not see...
186
00:08:57,788 --> 00:08:59,289
Why are you laughing?!
187
00:08:59,623 --> 00:09:02,542
Because,
you said monsters aren't real,
188
00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:05,796
so I conjured one,
'cause I'm a wizard, ahwandra.
189
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:12,386
Please tell me there's a spell
to make it go away.
190
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:14,930
There is, I just don't know it.
191
00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:18,892
You don't know
how to send it back?
192
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:20,602
Then why did you conjure it?
193
00:09:20,602 --> 00:09:22,854
- 'Cause you said I couldn't.
- You can't argue with the logic.
194
00:09:27,943 --> 00:09:29,027
I don't hear anything.
195
00:09:31,655 --> 00:09:34,408
See? Uh, maybe the monster
went away on its own?
196
00:09:34,783 --> 00:09:37,035
Yeah, that definitely happens.
Go check it out.
197
00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:46,003
You checked it out?
What is wrong with you?
198
00:09:46,003 --> 00:09:48,130
Me?
We didn't have a monster
199
00:09:48,130 --> 00:09:50,048
in the closet
until you came along!
200
00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:52,175
- Actually--
- Not now, Milo!
201
00:09:56,221 --> 00:09:57,389
My dad cannot find out
202
00:09:57,389 --> 00:09:58,682
there's a monster
running around the house.
203
00:09:58,890 --> 00:10:00,100
- It'll--
- Ruin his birthday.
204
00:10:01,643 --> 00:10:04,229
His birthday? If Justin Russo
finds out wizards are real,
205
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:06,565
- his head's gonna explode!
- Cool.
206
00:10:07,566 --> 00:10:09,276
Why did you bring
that... that...
207
00:10:09,526 --> 00:10:10,986
- Floogie.
- ...that floogie here,
208
00:10:10,986 --> 00:10:12,237
if you couldn't get rid of it?
209
00:10:12,237 --> 00:10:13,613
'Cause I didn't know
I couldn't get rid of it
210
00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:14,781
until I brought it here.
211
00:10:16,158 --> 00:10:18,452
You need to go back to...
wizard school.
212
00:10:18,869 --> 00:10:20,287
Well, I can't,
'cause I got kicked out.
213
00:10:21,872 --> 00:10:24,082
It's not my fault
my teachers don't believe in me.
214
00:10:24,333 --> 00:10:26,335
But I don't need them.
I don't need anyone.
215
00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:28,003
We definitely need someone.
216
00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:33,133
No, we don't. I can fix this.
217
00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:34,760
I'll get rid
of the floogie myself.
218
00:10:35,761 --> 00:10:36,762
Please.
219
00:10:37,220 --> 00:10:39,097
All right, fine.
But if that thing
220
00:10:39,097 --> 00:10:40,349
poops in the house,
you're cleaning it up.
221
00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:43,101
Oh, they don't poop.
They flarf. It's way worse.
222
00:10:46,855 --> 00:10:49,733
So, hypothetically, yeah, I use
words like hypothetically now,
223
00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:52,903
what would you say
if someone were to ask you
224
00:10:52,903 --> 00:10:54,112
to go back to teaching magic?
225
00:10:54,446 --> 00:10:56,031
Alex, what is this all about?
226
00:10:56,573 --> 00:11:00,035
Oh! Sorry I took so long.
Mr. Kopecky from next door
227
00:11:00,035 --> 00:11:02,329
forced me to look at pictures
of his grandson.
228
00:11:02,537 --> 00:11:04,915
Now, I would never say
that a baby is ugly,
229
00:11:04,915 --> 00:11:06,833
but this baby,
it looks like a foot.
230
00:11:08,710 --> 00:11:10,462
- Alex!
- Hey, Giada.
231
00:11:10,462 --> 00:11:11,671
What are you doing here?
232
00:11:13,215 --> 00:11:15,008
Giada, come on. I know that
Alex is my birthday surprise.
233
00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:16,385
Whoa, babe,
I would never ambush you
234
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:17,677
with family
and call it a present.
235
00:11:18,261 --> 00:11:19,888
So, Alex, how's work?
236
00:11:20,138 --> 00:11:22,307
Uh, work's great.
I'm on the Tribunal now.
237
00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:26,269
- You're on the Tribunal?
- There's a dog-walking tribunal?
238
00:11:27,437 --> 00:11:28,939
Yeah. Yeah, they were like,
239
00:11:29,439 --> 00:11:33,443
"Alex, there are some pretty bad
dogs out there, and...
240
00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:35,779
and you're the only one
that can help."
241
00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:38,865
Oh, you're
the only one, huh? You?
242
00:11:40,117 --> 00:11:41,910
Yeah.
Why is it so hard to believe?
243
00:11:41,910 --> 00:11:43,286
I mean, I am the family...
244
00:11:44,121 --> 00:11:45,205
dog walker.
245
00:11:46,623 --> 00:11:48,542
But I practically taught you
how to walk those dogs.
246
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,169
If anyone should have been
on the Tribunal, we both know
247
00:11:51,169 --> 00:11:52,546
that it should have been moi.
248
00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:55,966
Okay. Well, if you wanted
to make the Tribunal so badly,
249
00:11:55,966 --> 00:11:57,467
maybe you shouldn't have
hung up your leash.
250
00:11:57,801 --> 00:11:59,428
Okay, you know, well,
this is getting awkward.
251
00:11:59,428 --> 00:12:01,721
Is anybody thirsty? I'm not,
but I'm gonna leave anyway.
252
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,016
Dude, what's your problem?
253
00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:07,310
I thought you were happy
you left wizarding behind.
254
00:12:07,561 --> 00:12:11,356
I am, okay? I like my quiet,
predictable, no surprises life.
255
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,401
Then why are you acting
like you have flarf for brains?
256
00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:17,529
First, we don't use that kind
of language in this house.
257
00:12:19,531 --> 00:12:22,033
And second, if you're not
my birthday surprise,
258
00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:23,577
what are you doing here, Alex?
259
00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:28,665
Okay fine. Um, Billie is one of
the most extraordinary wizards
260
00:12:28,665 --> 00:12:30,417
I've ever met. But she needs...
261
00:12:31,710 --> 00:12:32,711
What was that?
262
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:36,506
Giada!
263
00:12:42,721 --> 00:12:44,014
This looks like
a floogie freeze.
264
00:12:45,474 --> 00:12:47,350
Oh, look at you remembering
your class-three monsters.
265
00:12:47,350 --> 00:12:49,186
- Just like old times.
When we were little, I used--
- Oh, no.
266
00:12:49,186 --> 00:12:52,272
No, no, no, no, no. No.
You said you wouldn't do magic.
267
00:12:52,522 --> 00:12:54,024
I didn't do this. It...
268
00:12:54,691 --> 00:12:56,651
- Billie...
- This is classic Alex.
269
00:12:57,068 --> 00:12:58,987
You're here for five minutes
and I got a floogie infestation,
270
00:12:58,987 --> 00:13:00,530
and just look
at my beautiful wife!
271
00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:06,620
I'll handle this. After all,
I am the family dog walker.
272
00:13:08,663 --> 00:13:11,583
The only way to unfreeze her
is to banish the floogie back
where it came from.
273
00:13:11,583 --> 00:13:15,629
I know, but thank you for the
refresher because... I forgot.
274
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:20,926
Whatever you do,
do not look the floogie
275
00:13:20,926 --> 00:13:22,594
right in the eye,
or he'll freeze you.
276
00:13:22,844 --> 00:13:25,472
Which one?
The thing's 90 percent eyes!
277
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:28,391
It's over there!
278
00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:33,730
He's eating the couch!
279
00:13:33,939 --> 00:13:35,565
Dad won't even let us
eat on the couch!
280
00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:42,072
Roman, look out!
281
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:46,952
- Milo!
- He saved you.
282
00:13:47,577 --> 00:13:50,288
Well, we're Russos. Russos
always have each other's backs.
283
00:13:51,373 --> 00:13:53,166
So, you would have done
the same thing for him?
284
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,795
I would have...
strongly considered it.
285
00:13:57,879 --> 00:14:00,423
We should hide him
until I can banish the floogie.
286
00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:02,551
I think if your parents
saw their son frozen solid,
287
00:14:02,551 --> 00:14:03,677
it'd be pretty upsetting.
288
00:14:03,969 --> 00:14:05,470
Do you? Do you think that?
289
00:14:06,805 --> 00:14:07,889
What are we gonna do
about the couch?
290
00:14:10,308 --> 00:14:11,851
- Oh, nice.
- Let's go.
291
00:14:17,107 --> 00:14:18,858
Where are we hiding the kid?
292
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,902
An infinity pocket?
Bottomless bag?
293
00:14:20,902 --> 00:14:22,988
You know, I can open a portal
to the Nowhere Zone.
294
00:14:23,405 --> 00:14:24,698
I'm not sending
my little brother
295
00:14:24,698 --> 00:14:26,700
to the Nowhere Zone.
He's got a field trip tomorrow.
296
00:14:27,951 --> 00:14:29,202
Help me put him on the bike.
297
00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:41,256
- A helmet? Really?
- It's the law!
298
00:14:45,010 --> 00:14:47,804
All right, Giada,
we're almost there.
299
00:14:48,263 --> 00:14:51,600
There we go.
Okay. Sorry.
300
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:56,062
that's...
Oh! Hey, g-- guys.
301
00:14:56,813 --> 00:14:58,898
I didn't know you were...
...out here.
302
00:14:59,107 --> 00:15:03,987
Oh, yeah, I was just showing
Billie the water heater.
303
00:15:03,987 --> 00:15:06,072
- Yeah.
- And I was just...
304
00:15:06,323 --> 00:15:09,117
I was just carrying
whatever's under this blanket.
305
00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:13,038
Well, that is some very
306
00:15:13,038 --> 00:15:16,166
normal behavior
from the both of us.
307
00:15:16,166 --> 00:15:18,209
Ta-ta.
308
00:15:19,961 --> 00:15:22,380
Uh, Roman, just real quick, bud.
309
00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:25,091
You haven't seen anything,
like, weird going on
310
00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:26,468
around here today, have you?
311
00:15:27,135 --> 00:15:31,848
Uh... No, no, no, no,
nothing weird.
312
00:15:32,015 --> 00:15:34,267
Just the regular old
boring Russos.
313
00:15:34,726 --> 00:15:36,770
No reason for you
to get worked up, Dad.
314
00:15:37,354 --> 00:15:39,272
Wait, wait, wait,
you're saying we're boring?
You think we're boring?
315
00:15:39,522 --> 00:15:41,441
Oh, yeah, totally,
totally the boring-est.
316
00:15:42,317 --> 00:15:44,319
Maybe I could stand to use
a little excitement in life.
317
00:15:44,319 --> 00:15:47,030
Well, well,
you are not gonna find it here,
318
00:15:47,030 --> 00:15:50,200
because our house
is boring central.
319
00:15:51,242 --> 00:15:54,412
See, I'm getting bored
just talking about it.
320
00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:56,873
See ya.
321
00:16:00,669 --> 00:16:03,963
Not there. Not there.
322
00:16:05,924 --> 00:16:09,302
Not there.
There you are.
323
00:16:12,263 --> 00:16:14,516
I guess I could start looking
for the floogie now.
324
00:16:19,104 --> 00:16:21,648
- Oh, hi, Alex. Bye, Alex.
- No, no.
325
00:16:22,691 --> 00:16:26,194
I knew it. You had something
to do with the floogie.
326
00:16:26,194 --> 00:16:27,779
This is just like
when you put a curse
327
00:16:27,779 --> 00:16:29,364
on Professor
Dinklebot's toothbrush.
328
00:16:30,365 --> 00:16:33,535
He was shaving
his tongue for a month.
329
00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:35,120
That was hilarious.
- I know!
330
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:38,164
But no!
This is not a laughing matter.
331
00:16:38,665 --> 00:16:41,209
Oh, you made me
sound like my mother. Billie,
332
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:44,587
Justin is not gonna teach you if
he thinks that you're trouble.
333
00:16:45,255 --> 00:16:47,799
- Sounds like a win-win to me.
- You don't get it.
334
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:50,343
This is your last chance.
335
00:16:51,136 --> 00:16:52,887
The Tribunal thinks
that you're dangerous
336
00:16:52,887 --> 00:16:54,139
and they wanna take your wand.
337
00:16:54,139 --> 00:16:56,307
But that's not fair.
I'm a great wizard.
338
00:16:56,307 --> 00:16:59,102
You're a powerful wizard.
There's a difference.
339
00:16:59,811 --> 00:17:02,313
I'm not dangerous, and I'll
prove it. I can fix this.
340
00:17:02,313 --> 00:17:06,025
Just stay out of the way. You've
done quite enough, young lady.
341
00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:08,361
Who am I right now?
342
00:17:11,865 --> 00:17:13,408
Hey, where are you going?
343
00:17:13,408 --> 00:17:15,410
I'm going upstairs
to find that floogie.
344
00:17:16,661 --> 00:17:17,746
What do you think you're doing?
345
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:20,623
Going with you.
You mess everything up!
346
00:17:20,915 --> 00:17:23,293
- You clearly need help!
- No, I don't!
347
00:17:23,877 --> 00:17:26,755
With magic cast by me alone,
I send thee to the Nowhere Zone.
348
00:17:30,633 --> 00:17:32,218
Here, floogie, floogie!
349
00:17:37,265 --> 00:17:42,771
Levitatus sofitus.
Wow, it's clean under here.
350
00:17:42,771 --> 00:17:44,856
What am I talking about?
We're at Justin's house.
351
00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:46,608
Of course
he vacuums under the couch.
352
00:17:49,194 --> 00:17:51,321
I wasn't using magic!
353
00:17:52,655 --> 00:17:56,993
Listen, Alex. I'm sorry
that I snapped at you, okay?
354
00:17:56,993 --> 00:17:59,579
It's just, you were talking
about all the great stuff
355
00:17:59,579 --> 00:18:01,998
you're doing, and I got jealous.
356
00:18:02,665 --> 00:18:03,833
Really? Of me?
357
00:18:04,292 --> 00:18:08,129
Yeah. You know,
maybe I do miss being a wizard.
358
00:18:09,714 --> 00:18:11,633
I'm so happy
to hear you say that.
359
00:18:12,759 --> 00:18:16,471
- Why?
- Okay, Billie is an incredibly
360
00:18:16,471 --> 00:18:19,140
powerful wizard,
but she's rebellious,
361
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:22,644
and stubborn and sarcastic.
She has no discipline.
362
00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:24,229
Sounds like
someone else I know.
363
00:18:24,229 --> 00:18:25,688
Like me, I get it.
364
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:28,525
But I had Dad.
365
00:18:28,525 --> 00:18:31,986
and I had you.
Billie has no one.
366
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:34,906
Every teacher she's ever had
has given up on her.
367
00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:39,744
- It's kinda why I'm here. I'm--
- No, Alex. No.
368
00:18:39,994 --> 00:18:43,081
I mean, I... I... I...
I don't teach wizards anymore.
369
00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:45,667
Justin, you were
the youngest headmaster
370
00:18:45,667 --> 00:18:47,293
of WizTech in history.
371
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,128
Yeah, and then I got fired.
372
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:52,006
So, what?
You just hide out here
373
00:18:52,006 --> 00:18:54,259
in Staten Island
and deny who you are?
374
00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:58,054
I don't want my family
to know anything about my past.
375
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:01,599
So, you're ashamed
of being a wizard?
376
00:19:02,225 --> 00:19:05,270
No. A failure.
377
00:19:13,403 --> 00:19:15,613
You only fail
if you give up, Justin.
378
00:19:17,782 --> 00:19:20,159
Billie needs a teacher
who believes in her.
379
00:19:21,452 --> 00:19:24,873
She needs you,
like I needed you.
380
00:19:27,584 --> 00:19:30,461
I don't know
if I have it in me to try again.
381
00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:39,512
This couch feels
two inches further to the left.
382
00:19:42,098 --> 00:19:43,641
Billie!
383
00:19:51,024 --> 00:19:53,610
Alex, there's a gigantic floogie
in my kid's room!
384
00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:57,906
Really? Where?
Billie, what did you do?
385
00:19:58,281 --> 00:20:00,909
I tried banishing it, but I only
made it bigger. Alex, please!
386
00:20:02,035 --> 00:20:04,621
I thought I could do it,
but I can't. I was wrong.
387
00:20:06,039 --> 00:20:07,582
Alex, what are you doing!?
Banish it for her!
388
00:20:14,839 --> 00:20:16,633
Alex!
Don't! Come here!
389
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:25,266
What are we gonna do?
Alex is the only wizard
390
00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:27,477
strong enough
to banish that thing. You do it.
391
00:20:27,477 --> 00:20:28,770
I... I can't do it.
392
00:20:29,145 --> 00:20:31,230
But Alex said you were the best
she's ever known.
393
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:32,899
Would've been nice
to hear that from her.
394
00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:38,363
Listen to me. You have
to do this, okay? Only you can.
395
00:20:38,363 --> 00:20:40,156
I already tried, but I failed.
396
00:20:43,201 --> 00:20:45,078
A wise wizard once told me,
you only fail if you give up.
397
00:20:45,578 --> 00:20:47,747
Now, what were you thinking
when you summoned it?
398
00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:49,499
Guess I just thought
of the floogie, the closet,
399
00:20:49,499 --> 00:20:51,292
and then I said the spell,
and it was there.
400
00:20:53,836 --> 00:20:55,880
Just focus, okay?
Clear your mind.
401
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:57,715
I told you, I can't.
402
00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:00,718
My teachers were right
not to believe in me.
403
00:21:02,512 --> 00:21:06,140
No. No, no, no.
You just had the wrong teachers.
404
00:21:06,140 --> 00:21:09,227
Okay? Hey,
you got this, all right?
405
00:21:09,936 --> 00:21:11,521
I believe in you, okay?
406
00:21:12,605 --> 00:21:14,023
Think of the place
you wanna send the floogie.
407
00:21:14,357 --> 00:21:16,901
And repeat after me.
408
00:21:17,902 --> 00:21:21,406
With magic strong
and words of power.
409
00:21:26,577 --> 00:21:28,204
We banish you, floogie,
at this hour.
410
00:21:29,330 --> 00:21:30,957
We banish you, floogie,
at this hour.
411
00:21:34,127 --> 00:21:36,045
Now, together.
412
00:21:36,421 --> 00:21:37,922
Back to the road
from whence you came,
413
00:21:37,922 --> 00:21:39,298
and never ever more remain.
414
00:21:49,559 --> 00:21:51,144
We did it!
415
00:21:53,271 --> 00:21:56,357
- You did it.
- And I knew that you could.
416
00:21:58,359 --> 00:21:59,360
Justin taught me.
417
00:21:59,736 --> 00:22:01,571
Oh, thought you don't
teach anymore.
418
00:22:02,530 --> 00:22:04,323
Wait, did you let yourself
get frozen on purpose
419
00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:05,700
so I'd have to step in
and instruct her,
420
00:22:05,700 --> 00:22:07,243
thus rediscovering
my love of teaching?
421
00:22:08,369 --> 00:22:10,538
That would've been
a really smart plan.
422
00:22:10,788 --> 00:22:12,206
Well, and I don't know
if you did or you didn't.
423
00:22:12,206 --> 00:22:14,083
That's just the way I want it.
424
00:22:18,629 --> 00:22:20,339
I was hanging
on my bike forever.
425
00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:22,967
I'm gonna have to put lotion
on my tender parts.
426
00:22:24,093 --> 00:22:25,970
She trapped me
in the Nowhere Zone.
427
00:22:26,429 --> 00:22:27,972
I saw things I can't forget.
428
00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:30,933
They don't have a lotion
for your brain, Milo.
429
00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:32,935
Actually, they do.
430
00:22:34,145 --> 00:22:34,812
But the worm
that makes it has to crawl in
431
00:22:34,812 --> 00:22:35,980
through your earhole.
432
00:22:37,648 --> 00:22:40,109
But for real,
thanks for trying to help me.
433
00:22:40,693 --> 00:22:42,320
Thanks for saving my family.
434
00:22:43,613 --> 00:22:45,031
I mean, you are the one
that put them in danger,
435
00:22:45,031 --> 00:22:47,075
but... thanks.
436
00:22:48,367 --> 00:22:50,328
It was so weird.
I-- I'm in the kitchen,
437
00:22:50,536 --> 00:22:51,746
and the next thing I know,
438
00:22:51,746 --> 00:22:53,539
I'm in the garage
with a blanket over my head.
439
00:22:53,539 --> 00:22:55,917
That is weird.
440
00:22:57,335 --> 00:22:58,461
You know, it's probably best
441
00:22:58,461 --> 00:23:00,004
to just forget about it
and move on.
442
00:23:02,423 --> 00:23:04,634
You know, I could hit her
with a little cerebellum erasus
443
00:23:04,634 --> 00:23:05,802
and erase her memory.
444
00:23:05,802 --> 00:23:07,178
Keep your wand
out of my wife's head.
445
00:23:10,181 --> 00:23:12,058
So, Milo, I've been thinking.
446
00:23:12,517 --> 00:23:14,477
Um, now that we know
that wizards are real,
447
00:23:14,477 --> 00:23:15,603
and monsters are real...
448
00:23:15,603 --> 00:23:17,480
I already knew that,
but continue.
449
00:23:19,857 --> 00:23:21,984
I've, uh, I've decided
to stay in our room.
450
00:23:22,360 --> 00:23:24,237
You know,
for when you get scared.
451
00:23:24,529 --> 00:23:26,114
When he gets scared
or when you get scared?
452
00:23:27,073 --> 00:23:30,451
When are you leaving?
Hey, Dad, when is she leaving?
453
00:23:30,827 --> 00:23:33,538
Actually, I was thinking
she could, uh, stay with us
454
00:23:33,538 --> 00:23:34,622
for a little while.
455
00:23:35,790 --> 00:23:37,667
- Are you sure?
- Yeah, Dad, are you sure?
456
00:23:39,544 --> 00:23:40,586
What do you think?
457
00:23:41,796 --> 00:23:45,299
I think
I could learn a lot here.
458
00:23:46,634 --> 00:23:48,094
And Giada's cool with this?
459
00:23:48,094 --> 00:23:49,470
- Totally.
- You didn't ask her.
460
00:23:49,679 --> 00:23:51,097
I didn't.
461
00:23:52,348 --> 00:23:54,225
Can't believe you're staying.
462
00:23:55,852 --> 00:23:57,228
You know,
I thought the face you made
463
00:23:57,228 --> 00:23:59,105
when you saw the floogie
was my favourite.
464
00:23:59,522 --> 00:24:00,982
But now it's this one.
465
00:24:00,982 --> 00:24:02,942
This one is definitely
my favorite.
466
00:24:04,527 --> 00:24:06,195
Happy birthday, J-Man.
467
00:24:06,195 --> 00:24:07,572
- Aw.
- Happy birthday!
468
00:24:07,780 --> 00:24:09,657
Oh, right, it's your birthday.
469
00:24:14,036 --> 00:24:16,289
If I'm gonna train you,
it can't be here.
470
00:24:16,289 --> 00:24:17,415
Why not?
471
00:24:17,415 --> 00:24:19,208
His family
doesn't know about wizards.
472
00:24:20,168 --> 00:24:23,212
Right! [laughs] Yes,
they do not know about wizards,
473
00:24:23,212 --> 00:24:25,464
'cause I didn't tell them.
So, unless you told them--
474
00:24:25,464 --> 00:24:27,466
You know,
that is a really nice cardigan.
475
00:24:29,468 --> 00:24:30,595
Thank you.
476
00:24:31,888 --> 00:24:34,307
Alex, will you do the honors?
477
00:24:34,557 --> 00:24:36,475
Mm-hm.
478
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:47,904
The old lair,
this takes me back.
479
00:24:47,904 --> 00:24:49,822
Oh!
480
00:24:59,749 --> 00:25:02,877
Hello, Wandy. My old friend.
481
00:25:07,006 --> 00:25:08,799
You know, I thought
you were just bringing me
482
00:25:08,799 --> 00:25:10,092
to another teacher
who doesn't care.
483
00:25:10,635 --> 00:25:13,638
But, I was wrong.
Thanks for believing in me.
484
00:25:13,846 --> 00:25:16,682
Of course. Us rebels,
we gotta stick together.
485
00:25:16,682 --> 00:25:18,434
Look, I have to go back
486
00:25:18,434 --> 00:25:19,810
to the Tribunal. Are you good?
487
00:25:20,144 --> 00:25:21,812
Don't worry. I'll be okay here.
488
00:25:22,188 --> 00:25:24,232
Zippo zap,
zippo zee, zippo zeria!
489
00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:28,903
Still got it.
490
00:25:30,238 --> 00:25:33,074
Okay, good, good,
because there's one thing I, um,
491
00:25:33,074 --> 00:25:34,951
kind of sort of
forgot to mention.
492
00:25:34,951 --> 00:25:37,203
Nothing big,
just this teeny tiny,
493
00:25:37,203 --> 00:25:39,538
but very real prophecy
about the end of the world,
494
00:25:39,538 --> 00:25:41,290
and Billie being
the only one who can save us.
495
00:25:42,625 --> 00:25:44,126
The fate of the world
is in her hands?
496
00:25:45,711 --> 00:25:47,255
Well, technically,
it's in your hands.
497
00:25:48,923 --> 00:25:50,174
You make sure she's ready,
498
00:25:50,174 --> 00:25:52,551
and I'll figure out
what she needs to be ready for.
499
00:25:53,344 --> 00:25:54,553
Thank you.
500
00:25:56,055 --> 00:25:57,056
For everything.
501
00:25:58,015 --> 00:25:59,725
Russos always
have each other's backs.
502
00:26:00,309 --> 00:26:02,311
Well, don't blow it, J-Man.
503
00:26:07,650 --> 00:26:09,485
I've missed this.
504
00:26:15,074 --> 00:26:17,285
"Don't blow it, J-Man."
What'd she mean by that?
505
00:26:18,327 --> 00:26:19,745
Uh, well, I, uh...
506
00:26:20,705 --> 00:26:22,081
I think we should get started.
507
00:26:22,748 --> 00:26:27,044
♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪