1
00:00:01,377 --> 00:00:05,131
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
2
00:00:05,131 --> 00:00:07,425
Okay, Woogle,
send a message to Alex.
3
00:00:07,425 --> 00:00:09,176
- [chimes]
- Hey, Alex.
4
00:00:09,427 --> 00:00:11,011
Don't worry, I'm not in trouble.
5
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:13,347
Actually, I've been
at your brother's house
for 12 hours
6
00:00:13,347 --> 00:00:15,099
and I haven't screwed up
bad enough
to get kicked out yet.
7
00:00:16,350 --> 00:00:18,102
Granted, nine of those hours
I was sleeping,
8
00:00:18,102 --> 00:00:19,395
but still, a win's a win.
9
00:00:20,730 --> 00:00:22,440
[sighs]
I really wanna stay here,
10
00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:24,108
so I'm gonna be
the best guest ever.
11
00:00:24,108 --> 00:00:26,235
I'm gonna do nice stuff
and pitch in.
12
00:00:26,235 --> 00:00:27,319
I don't wanna jinx it,
13
00:00:27,319 --> 00:00:29,155
but I think this is
gonna work out.
14
00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:31,240
Then again,
I did fail my jinx final,
15
00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:32,658
so scratch that last part.
16
00:00:33,576 --> 00:00:34,785
And send.
17
00:00:38,164 --> 00:00:39,874
Let's see. Nice stuff.
18
00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:42,001
What's nice?
19
00:00:43,461 --> 00:00:45,296
Ooh! I got it. A houseplant.
20
00:00:48,090 --> 00:00:50,468
Mm. No one notices a houseplant.
21
00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:52,178
Ooh! I know.
22
00:00:57,141 --> 00:00:59,435
Too nice.
That'll get him arrested.
23
00:01:02,605 --> 00:01:03,606
[sighs]
24
00:01:05,483 --> 00:01:07,526
I'm overthinking.
I'll just keep it simple.
25
00:01:07,526 --> 00:01:09,153
Make him a nice breakfast.
26
00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:14,450
[whispering] Billie!
27
00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:17,453
[Giada] Aw!
28
00:01:18,037 --> 00:01:19,580
Are you making me eggs?
29
00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:22,124
Well, they certainly don't
make themselves.
30
00:01:24,168 --> 00:01:25,961
- Thank you.
- Uh-huh. Yeah.
31
00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:29,298
[knock on door]
32
00:01:30,758 --> 00:01:31,842
[Billie gasps]
33
00:01:32,343 --> 00:01:35,304
An egg was scrambling itself
on my stove.
34
00:01:36,305 --> 00:01:37,890
Did you want sunny side up?
35
00:01:39,058 --> 00:01:40,476
You, lair, now.
36
00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:44,522
You were using magic.
37
00:01:44,522 --> 00:01:46,148
Isn't that why Alex
brought me here?
38
00:01:46,148 --> 00:01:47,900
So you could train me
to control my magic?
39
00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:51,195
Yeah, in the lair.
Giada almost saw.
40
00:01:51,195 --> 00:01:53,614
My wife,
she's an investigative reporter.
41
00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:55,658
She asks questions for a living.
42
00:01:55,658 --> 00:01:57,910
And I do not want her knowing
about my wizard past.
43
00:01:57,910 --> 00:02:02,665
Okay, so-- so in here, wizard.
Out there, mortal. Do we got it?
44
00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:05,459
No problem, I can act
like a mortal teenager.
45
00:02:06,961 --> 00:02:09,505
I'm literally starving.
Get out of my room.
46
00:02:09,505 --> 00:02:10,840
Where even is my charger?
47
00:02:12,550 --> 00:02:13,968
Wow, you nailed that.
48
00:02:14,718 --> 00:02:16,720
[♪ theme song playing]
49
00:02:17,972 --> 00:02:20,891
{\an8}♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪
50
00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:22,685
{\an8}♪ When you can have
what you want ♪
51
00:02:22,685 --> 00:02:24,645
{\an8}♪ By the simplest of means ♪
52
00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:27,648
{\an8}♪ Be careful not to mess
with the balance of things ♪
53
00:02:27,648 --> 00:02:32,194
{\an8}♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
54
00:02:32,194 --> 00:02:34,488
♪ You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes ♪
55
00:02:34,488 --> 00:02:37,908
♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
56
00:02:37,908 --> 00:02:39,159
♪ Yes, please ♪
57
00:02:41,203 --> 00:02:42,872
- ♪ What it seems ♪
- [♪ theme song ends]
58
00:02:42,872 --> 00:02:45,165
- Morning, Giada.
- Hey, Billie. How'd you sleep?
59
00:02:45,457 --> 00:02:47,710
Great.
Comfy mattress, cozy blanket,
60
00:02:47,710 --> 00:02:49,378
no dragon screeching
at 6:00 a.m.
61
00:02:49,628 --> 00:02:50,880
Dragon?
62
00:02:54,008 --> 00:02:55,718
{\an8}She's joking.
[chuckles nervously]
63
00:02:55,718 --> 00:02:56,886
{\an8}It's a joke.
64
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,347
{\an8}Right, a joke.
[chuckles]
65
00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:02,057
{\an8}I was joking.
66
00:03:04,935 --> 00:03:07,438
{\an8}Hey, Dad,
so it's new comic book day,
67
00:03:07,813 --> 00:03:09,565
{\an8}and Milo and I were taking stock
of our finances.
68
00:03:09,565 --> 00:03:10,983
{\an8}Turns out we don't have any.
69
00:03:12,151 --> 00:03:13,986
Dad, it occurred to us,
70
00:03:13,986 --> 00:03:15,779
we haven't been paid allowance
in two weeks.
71
00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:19,909
{\an8}Oh. Is that right?
Hey, Giada, question for you.
72
00:03:19,909 --> 00:03:22,119
When's the last time the boys
washed the dishes?
73
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,830
{\an8}You know,
I think it was two weeks ago.
74
00:03:25,331 --> 00:03:26,749
Which, if I'm not mistaken,
75
00:03:26,749 --> 00:03:28,792
is also the last time
they cleaned their bathroom.
76
00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:29,877
[spits]
77
00:03:31,295 --> 00:03:32,504
{\an8}That bathroom
hasn't been cleaned
in two weeks?
78
00:03:32,838 --> 00:03:34,256
{\an8}I don't wear shoes in there.
79
00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:36,133
Whoa, hold on.
80
00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:37,885
You guys aren't
paying us allowance
81
00:03:37,885 --> 00:03:39,637
{\an8}because we didn't do chores?
82
00:03:40,095 --> 00:03:42,222
{\an8}Yeah,
that's how allowance works.
83
00:03:42,473 --> 00:03:45,225
{\an8}Grandma gives me money
for being cute. Just saying.
84
00:03:46,685 --> 00:03:49,021
If you want your allowance,
you have to do your chores.
85
00:03:49,021 --> 00:03:50,648
Okay, but that's
gonna take forever.
86
00:03:50,940 --> 00:03:52,691
- I can help.
- Really?
87
00:03:52,691 --> 00:03:55,527
Yeah, I live here now.
I can pitch in.
88
00:03:56,195 --> 00:04:00,491
{\an8}Billie, that is so sweet.
She's been here two days, boys.
89
00:04:00,491 --> 00:04:02,534
{\an8}Two days
and she's already my favorite.
90
00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:05,621
{\an8}[together] But I'm the favorite!
91
00:04:06,205 --> 00:04:07,414
{\an8}[together] Wait a minute.
92
00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:11,001
All right,
let's do these chores.
93
00:04:11,001 --> 00:04:12,127
How can I help?
94
00:04:13,420 --> 00:04:14,421
{\an8}Let's see, how could
a wizard help with chores?
95
00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:15,839
{\an8}Oh, here's an idea.
96
00:04:15,839 --> 00:04:17,841
{\an8}You could cast a spell
that does our chores for us.
97
00:04:19,093 --> 00:04:20,636
I thought you didn't like
her doing magic.
98
00:04:20,636 --> 00:04:23,138
{\an8}Milo, we have two weeks
of chores to do.
99
00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:24,974
{\an8}I'd let her conjure
another floogie
100
00:04:24,974 --> 00:04:26,642
if it would clean our room
for us.
101
00:04:27,434 --> 00:04:29,186
Sorry, I can't use magic.
102
00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:31,480
What? Why?
Did you lose your wand?
103
00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:33,107
No, I still have my wand.
104
00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:36,360
Then use it.
I'm not cleaning that bathroom.
105
00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:37,569
Milo has terrible aim.
106
00:04:37,569 --> 00:04:39,613
What can I say?
It's my one flaw.
107
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,825
I told you, I can't use magic.
108
00:04:42,825 --> 00:04:44,868
- I get it, she doesn't know how.
- I know how!
109
00:04:44,868 --> 00:04:46,537
Yesterday you were all,
"I'm a powerful wizard!"
110
00:04:46,537 --> 00:04:48,122
- I am a powerful wizard!
- And today you're like,
111
00:04:48,122 --> 00:04:49,415
"I don't know the spells
to do chores."
112
00:04:49,415 --> 00:04:50,666
I know the spells.
113
00:04:52,084 --> 00:04:52,835
I just promised your dad
I wouldn't use magic, okay?
114
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,378
Our dad?
115
00:04:57,006 --> 00:04:58,549
Not because he's a wizard,
116
00:04:58,924 --> 00:05:00,551
if that's what
you were thinking.
117
00:05:01,593 --> 00:05:04,388
- I wasn't. But I am now!
- Dad's a wizard?
118
00:05:04,388 --> 00:05:05,889
We gotta go talk to him
about this!
119
00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:07,141
No, you can't!
120
00:05:07,141 --> 00:05:09,435
- I wasn't supposed to tell you.
- Dad!
121
00:05:09,435 --> 00:05:11,186
End whisper chant
with pure devotion,
122
00:05:11,186 --> 00:05:12,855
bound by magic trapped
in slow motion.
123
00:05:12,855 --> 00:05:15,441
- [distorted] Don't...
- I gotta find a way to fix this.
124
00:05:16,734 --> 00:05:17,943
Hurry up, spit it out!
125
00:05:19,695 --> 00:05:22,281
I'm just playing,
I know you in slow motion.
I'll be right back.
126
00:05:22,281 --> 00:05:24,241
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
127
00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:27,619
Hey, Justin,
I've been thinking about Billie.
128
00:05:29,288 --> 00:05:31,331
What about Billie? Like about
how she's such a neat kid
129
00:05:31,331 --> 00:05:33,667
for offering to do chores?
What a superstar, am I right?
130
00:05:34,877 --> 00:05:37,337
It's just, she's...
she's living with us now,
131
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,757
and I really don't know
anything about her.
132
00:05:39,757 --> 00:05:42,259
I'm gonna go talk to her,
ask her
some follow-up questions.
133
00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:44,762
Follow-up questions? No, wait!
134
00:05:46,472 --> 00:05:48,932
She's in there doing chores,
don't bother her, you know?
135
00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:50,768
Maybe ask me, maybe...
maybe I know.
136
00:05:51,477 --> 00:05:53,687
Okay, um, where's she from?
137
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:56,440
Oh, she's from Wiz... consin.
138
00:05:57,274 --> 00:05:58,275
Wisconsin!
139
00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:01,987
Okay, and what's she into?
Is she into music? Sports?
140
00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:05,532
- Sports. Yep, sports.
- Yeah.
141
00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:07,493
- So what's her favorite team?
- Uh...
142
00:06:08,494 --> 00:06:11,038
You know, probably,
uh... the Wizards.
143
00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:14,083
- That's weird.
- Is it? Why?
144
00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:17,086
Well, she's from Wisconsin.
You'd think it'd be the Bucks.
145
00:06:17,086 --> 00:06:19,880
You'd think that, yeah, right?
You'd totally think that.
146
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,091
Well,
nothing I can do about it now.
147
00:06:23,133 --> 00:06:25,803
So, basketball,
that-- that can't be all.
148
00:06:25,803 --> 00:06:27,513
You know, look,
I'm just gonna go talk to her.
149
00:06:27,763 --> 00:06:29,098
Of course that's not all, Giada.
150
00:06:29,098 --> 00:06:30,766
She also loves to do spell...
151
00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:33,727
...ing bees.
Spelling bees.
152
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,063
And... And...
And the musical, The Wiz.
153
00:06:36,563 --> 00:06:38,816
And she loves her wand--
154
00:06:39,775 --> 00:06:41,401
...a Sykes.
155
00:06:42,152 --> 00:06:44,071
Yep, big fan of Wanda Sykes.
156
00:06:44,071 --> 00:06:45,697
Sports, comedy, arts,
and academics.
157
00:06:45,697 --> 00:06:48,117
Sounds like a well-rounded,
interesting character to me.
158
00:06:48,117 --> 00:06:50,953
So, does that answer
all your questions?
159
00:06:52,287 --> 00:06:53,330
I guess?
160
00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,043
[sighs in relief]
161
00:06:58,043 --> 00:06:59,670
I cannot believe I made up
that whole backstory
162
00:06:59,670 --> 00:07:01,421
like right off the top
of my head.
163
00:07:02,131 --> 00:07:03,298
[sighs deeply]
164
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:06,093
Should I do improv?
No, that's ridiculous.
165
00:07:06,093 --> 00:07:07,386
I should teach improv.
166
00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:12,099
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
167
00:07:13,142 --> 00:07:14,309
[sighs] Gotta find a way
168
00:07:14,309 --> 00:07:16,353
to make the boys forget
what I told them.
169
00:07:17,104 --> 00:07:18,647
Oh! They got Wizardpedia.
170
00:07:20,023 --> 00:07:21,984
Welcome to Wizardpedia,
171
00:07:22,359 --> 00:07:24,736
the all-knowing
wizard encyclopedia.
172
00:07:24,987 --> 00:07:27,531
I need an erasing spell,
not because I messed up,
173
00:07:27,531 --> 00:07:29,241
but I will be clearing
the search history.
174
00:07:30,075 --> 00:07:31,827
I've got an erasing potion!
175
00:07:32,161 --> 00:07:35,664
- Perfect!
- Section one, history.
[clears throat]
176
00:07:36,039 --> 00:07:38,417
The first recorded use
of an erasing potion was--
177
00:07:38,417 --> 00:07:39,668
No time.
178
00:07:39,668 --> 00:07:41,253
- In many cultures--
- No time!
179
00:07:42,296 --> 00:07:44,423
Well, I do have a formula,
180
00:07:44,423 --> 00:07:46,592
but I don't suppose
you have the time for that.
181
00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:48,093
Quit playing, Wizardpedia.
182
00:07:48,844 --> 00:07:50,262
[chuckles] Very well.
183
00:07:51,346 --> 00:07:56,018
Two parts moonlight,
one part dragon scale,
184
00:07:56,018 --> 00:07:58,770
and a pinch of shadow mist.
185
00:07:59,521 --> 00:08:03,817
Now, gently,
very gently mix the--
186
00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:05,152
Oh! Oh!
187
00:08:05,152 --> 00:08:07,946
Or just do that. What do I know?
188
00:08:07,946 --> 00:08:09,323
I'm only
the collective knowledge
189
00:08:09,323 --> 00:08:11,241
of thousands
of years of wizardry.
190
00:08:12,618 --> 00:08:14,661
Now, all I gotta do
is splash the guys
191
00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:16,288
and their memories
will be erased.
192
00:08:16,580 --> 00:08:18,957
Wait, you want
to erase their memory?
193
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,210
Oh, boy.
194
00:08:21,210 --> 00:08:25,797
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
195
00:08:26,215 --> 00:08:28,008
Hey, Billie.
You settling in okay?
196
00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:30,928
Me? Yup. Settling in great.
Well, good talking to you.
197
00:08:31,386 --> 00:08:32,471
Hold on a second.
198
00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:36,808
I think we should talk
about this whole Wizards thing.
199
00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:38,894
What?
How do you know about that?
200
00:08:39,186 --> 00:08:40,270
Justin told me.
201
00:08:40,270 --> 00:08:42,022
Justin told you about wizards?
202
00:08:42,272 --> 00:08:43,941
Yeah. And, you know,
it's not a big deal.
203
00:08:43,941 --> 00:08:45,817
But I just-- I wouldn't
go around telling everybody.
204
00:08:46,068 --> 00:08:47,152
I wouldn't. I would never.
205
00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:50,155
'Cause, you know,
you're living
in Staten Island now,
206
00:08:50,155 --> 00:08:51,198
so your choices
are really only the Knicks
or the Nets.
207
00:08:52,574 --> 00:08:53,617
The what and the heh?
208
00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:57,329
Basketball?
Justin said the Wizards
are your favorite team.
209
00:08:57,829 --> 00:09:01,750
Right! The Wizards.
Go basketball! See ya.
210
00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:04,962
"Go basketball"?
211
00:09:07,005 --> 00:09:09,049
[distorted] Don't...
212
00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:12,386
Slow no more, swift restored,
back to full speed, I implore!
213
00:09:12,970 --> 00:09:15,138
...you dare cast a spell on us,
214
00:09:15,138 --> 00:09:18,058
is what I was gonna say
before you cast a spell on us.
215
00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:22,187
I can't believe Dad's
a wizard! Dad!
216
00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:24,648
You can't tell him
that I told you.
217
00:09:24,648 --> 00:09:27,317
This isn't the kind
of information
you just, like, forget.
218
00:09:27,651 --> 00:09:30,570
It is now. In a second,
you'll forget everything.
219
00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:32,656
Why'd you do that?
220
00:09:33,532 --> 00:09:35,158
- What is this?
- Erasing potion.
221
00:09:35,158 --> 00:09:36,952
- Give me that.
- [crashes]
222
00:09:37,995 --> 00:09:41,373
Please tell me you know a spell
for a new pair of chinos.
223
00:09:42,291 --> 00:09:44,376
It didn't work.
I still know Dad's a wizard.
224
00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:49,256
Something got erased.
Milo, your top half is gone.
225
00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:51,550
Roman, your bottom half is gone.
226
00:09:52,843 --> 00:09:56,888
Billie, you didn't erase
our memories, you erased us!
227
00:09:57,180 --> 00:09:58,890
Any chance I erased me?
228
00:09:58,890 --> 00:10:00,517
- No!
- Dang it!
229
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,019
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
230
00:10:04,021 --> 00:10:07,024
This is a nightmare,
Monday's picture day!
231
00:10:07,399 --> 00:10:09,359
- I can fix this.
- Are you crazy?
232
00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:10,485
You're the one who did it!
233
00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:13,071
In my defense, I was looking
for an erasing potion,
234
00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:14,698
not an erasing potion!
235
00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:17,159
Oh, I see where
the mix-up happened.
236
00:10:18,410 --> 00:10:20,037
Dad's a wizard,
he can fix this.
237
00:10:20,037 --> 00:10:21,663
No, please,
don't tell your dad.
238
00:10:21,663 --> 00:10:22,873
Why not?
239
00:10:23,999 --> 00:10:25,167
Come on, Milo.
240
00:10:25,167 --> 00:10:26,626
I don't wanna
get kicked out, okay?
241
00:10:27,252 --> 00:10:28,253
Kicked out?
242
00:10:29,463 --> 00:10:30,255
It's happened
at every other place I live.
243
00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:31,631
I mess up, and I get kicked out.
244
00:10:32,007 --> 00:10:33,884
- My dad wouldn't do that.
- Really?
245
00:10:33,884 --> 00:10:36,845
What would you do
if the kid you took in
blew your biggest secret
246
00:10:36,845 --> 00:10:39,097
and turned your sons
half invisible?
247
00:10:39,097 --> 00:10:40,515
If it makes you feel any better,
248
00:10:40,515 --> 00:10:42,559
I like to think of us
as half visible.
249
00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:45,062
Please, you can't tell.
250
00:10:45,062 --> 00:10:47,481
I have nowhere else to go,
just let me fix this.
251
00:10:47,939 --> 00:10:49,524
Okay, fine, but you owe me.
252
00:10:49,858 --> 00:10:52,402
In addition to the legs
you already owe me.
253
00:10:53,487 --> 00:10:55,572
- Thank you.
- [Giada] Hey, guys.
254
00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:56,782
It's your mom. Hide!
255
00:11:00,494 --> 00:11:02,996
Hey, Giada, nothing to see here.
256
00:11:03,538 --> 00:11:04,748
I mean everything to see here
257
00:11:04,748 --> 00:11:07,584
because it's all here,
and you can see it.
258
00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:09,669
Good to know.
259
00:11:11,213 --> 00:11:12,172
Roman, if you see your father,
tell him I'm in the garage.
260
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:13,799
And don't forget
to do the dishes.
261
00:11:14,049 --> 00:11:15,384
[Milo] I'm on it, Mom.
262
00:11:17,511 --> 00:11:18,553
Was that Milo?
263
00:11:18,553 --> 00:11:20,931
Uh, yeah, you just missed him.
264
00:11:20,931 --> 00:11:24,184
He ran upstairs
to go clean the... shower.
265
00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:26,061
[scoffs] Clean the shower?
266
00:11:26,061 --> 00:11:28,355
Billie, you are such
a good influence.
267
00:11:28,355 --> 00:11:29,898
[scoffs] You might wanna wait
268
00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:31,983
till you get all the facts
on that one, Mom.
269
00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:37,030
[Milo] Phew! Thought
we were busted for sure.
270
00:11:37,531 --> 00:11:39,616
- [Justin] Giada?
- We still might be.
271
00:11:43,495 --> 00:11:46,206
Hey, Justin, Giada wanted us
to tell you she's in the garage.
272
00:11:46,540 --> 00:11:47,707
The garage?
273
00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:48,834
Okay, I'll be back.
274
00:11:50,001 --> 00:11:51,378
And Milo, how many times
do I gotta tell you?
275
00:11:51,378 --> 00:11:53,672
Figure out what you want
before you open up the fridge.
276
00:11:53,672 --> 00:11:55,424
[Milo] I did, string cheese.
277
00:11:55,424 --> 00:11:58,176
That's what my fully visible
top half is looking for.
278
00:11:59,344 --> 00:12:00,387
Well, save some for me,
279
00:12:01,763 --> 00:12:02,431
'cause my fully visible top half
will want some later.
280
00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:06,101
- [door opens, closes]
- [sighs] Okay.
281
00:12:06,101 --> 00:12:07,769
Time to un-disappear you.
282
00:12:09,187 --> 00:12:10,397
Where's my wand?
283
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:12,232
It was in my hand
when you spilled the--
284
00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:14,484
Oh, no. My wand's invisible!
285
00:12:14,484 --> 00:12:15,944
Okay, well, we have to find it!
286
00:12:16,778 --> 00:12:18,447
- [Milo] I found it!
- My wand?
287
00:12:18,447 --> 00:12:20,449
[Milo] No. The string cheese.
288
00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:23,076
Now, I just gotta find my mouth.
289
00:12:23,076 --> 00:12:27,247
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
290
00:12:27,581 --> 00:12:30,667
Giada? You in here?
291
00:12:31,460 --> 00:12:35,839
Hello, Justin.
Please, have a seat.
292
00:12:38,133 --> 00:12:40,427
After our earlier conversation
about Billie,
293
00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:44,389
I couldn't help feeling
like something's up.
294
00:12:45,140 --> 00:12:46,141
Oh, no.
295
00:12:47,392 --> 00:12:48,685
That's bright.
296
00:12:49,478 --> 00:12:53,857
So, I'd like to ask you
some follow-up questions.
297
00:12:55,525 --> 00:12:56,985
Follow-up questions.
298
00:12:58,069 --> 00:12:59,696
So, let me get this straight.
299
00:12:59,696 --> 00:13:01,781
You're saying
that Alex met Billie
300
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,325
at a dog-walking conference,
301
00:13:03,325 --> 00:13:06,369
and took her under her wing
because, and I quote,
302
00:13:06,369 --> 00:13:09,581
"Billie is the most
powerful dog-walker ever"?
303
00:13:10,332 --> 00:13:11,374
Is that what I said?
304
00:13:12,918 --> 00:13:14,002
I mean, if you said I said it,
then I must have said it, so...
305
00:13:14,002 --> 00:13:15,128
Is it hot in here?
306
00:13:16,213 --> 00:13:18,048
Yeah, the thing is,
I did a search
307
00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:20,425
and there hasn't been
a dog-walking conference
in Wisconsin
308
00:13:20,425 --> 00:13:22,427
since 1962.
309
00:13:23,178 --> 00:13:24,429
Are you sure about that?
310
00:13:24,429 --> 00:13:26,097
Did you check
the whole internet?
311
00:13:26,556 --> 00:13:27,891
You're not making sense.
312
00:13:27,891 --> 00:13:29,684
I mean, this girl
is living in our house,
313
00:13:29,684 --> 00:13:30,936
and I don't know
anything about her.
314
00:13:30,936 --> 00:13:32,312
Well, Billie and I
are both wizards.
315
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:34,147
I just want to know
what color pillows she likes.
316
00:13:34,147 --> 00:13:36,274
- Did you say "pillows"?
- Did you say "wizards"?
317
00:13:36,274 --> 00:13:38,860
I said lizards.
Green. Lizard green.
318
00:13:38,860 --> 00:13:40,320
Yeah, that's a color.
319
00:13:40,612 --> 00:13:42,447
Tell me more
about these pillows.
320
00:13:42,906 --> 00:13:44,699
Well, no, you know,
I just want to know
what she likes
321
00:13:44,699 --> 00:13:46,535
because I want to be able
to redecorate her room
322
00:13:46,535 --> 00:13:47,911
so she'll feel more at home.
323
00:13:48,787 --> 00:13:50,372
That's why
you're interrogating me?
324
00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:52,040
Interrogating you?
325
00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:55,252
Oh, honey,
if I were interrogating you,
you'd be crying.
326
00:13:56,711 --> 00:14:00,215
Exactly. And I'm not crying
at all, so... [sniffles]
327
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:01,841
Why don't we go check out
these pillows?
328
00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:03,385
Okay, I'll go grab my keys.
329
00:14:03,385 --> 00:14:05,053
Good, yeah, you drive,
'cause...
330
00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:07,138
I got something in my eye.
331
00:14:07,138 --> 00:14:11,142
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
332
00:14:11,142 --> 00:14:12,352
Where's my wand?
333
00:14:13,895 --> 00:14:15,063
[Milo] It'd be so much easier
to find if we could see it.
334
00:14:16,565 --> 00:14:17,983
- [grunts]
- [objects clatter]
335
00:14:18,233 --> 00:14:21,528
God, Milo,
I tripped on your dumb legs.
336
00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:22,696
How'd you do that?
337
00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:24,698
They're the one part
of him you can see.
338
00:14:25,657 --> 00:14:28,034
[Milo] Uh, guys? The bottle!
339
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:29,494
The potion
must've made it disappear
340
00:14:29,494 --> 00:14:30,579
when you guys were fighting.
341
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:32,622
But the flour made it visible.
342
00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:34,791
That's it.
That's how we find my wand!
343
00:14:34,791 --> 00:14:36,918
Do you guys have
anything else powdery
around here?
344
00:14:36,918 --> 00:14:39,129
A pouch of nibble warts?
Some ground shibble sticks?
345
00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:42,841
A card to the Wally Gog?
No Wally Gog?
346
00:14:44,426 --> 00:14:45,844
There's baking soda
in the fridge.
347
00:14:45,844 --> 00:14:49,139
[chuckles] Baking soda,
that's a funny word.
348
00:14:50,307 --> 00:14:52,559
[Justin in the distance]
Boys, can you give me a hand?
349
00:14:52,559 --> 00:14:53,685
Somebody's gotta stall him.
350
00:14:54,936 --> 00:14:57,063
- [Milo] Coming, Daddy!
- What? Not you, Milo!
351
00:14:57,772 --> 00:14:59,316
- [Milo] Hey, Dad!
- Hey, Dad!
352
00:14:59,316 --> 00:15:00,442
[Justin] Hey, guys.
353
00:15:01,860 --> 00:15:03,653
Do some shopping, did we?
354
00:15:05,488 --> 00:15:06,948
Are you wearing Milo's pants?
355
00:15:09,159 --> 00:15:13,663
I suppose in this instance,
it would appear that I am.
356
00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:17,584
Come on, wand, where are you?
357
00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:19,669
There you are.
358
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,422
Hey, can you boys give me a hand
with these bags?
359
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:23,965
[chuckles] Sure thing, Dad.
360
00:15:24,507 --> 00:15:26,176
Okay, we have to move
in perfect unison.
361
00:15:26,176 --> 00:15:29,429
On three, step left.
One, two, three.
362
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:31,973
Why didn't you go left?
363
00:15:33,308 --> 00:15:34,476
[Milo] It's not my fault.
I can't see my hands.
364
00:15:34,476 --> 00:15:35,977
I don't know
which one makes the L.
365
00:15:37,771 --> 00:15:39,564
Roman? Milo?
366
00:15:39,564 --> 00:15:41,316
Dad, it's not
what it looks like!
367
00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:42,525
Found my wand!
368
00:15:42,525 --> 00:15:44,402
Justin,
it's not what it looks like!
369
00:15:44,736 --> 00:15:46,029
Giada is right outside.
370
00:15:46,029 --> 00:15:48,114
Quick, give me your wand!
Revealus!
371
00:15:50,367 --> 00:15:51,826
- Justin?
- Giada!
372
00:15:52,327 --> 00:15:53,578
It's not what it looks like!
373
00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:56,665
You just did magic!
374
00:15:56,665 --> 00:15:58,333
Okay, it is what it looks like.
375
00:15:59,501 --> 00:16:01,252
Justin, what is going on?
376
00:16:01,252 --> 00:16:02,420
Look,
377
00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:05,131
there's something that I should
have told you a long time ago.
378
00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:07,759
I'm a wizard.
379
00:16:07,759 --> 00:16:09,552
[scoffs] A wizard?
380
00:16:10,512 --> 00:16:12,430
I know. It sounds crazy.
381
00:16:12,430 --> 00:16:13,890
Yes, it does.
382
00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:14,974
But it's true.
383
00:16:16,226 --> 00:16:19,145
I don't even...
I don't even know what this is.
384
00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:20,814
Giada. Giada, wait. I...
385
00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:23,274
- Justin, I'm sorry. I didn't--
- What were you thinking?
386
00:16:23,274 --> 00:16:24,609
This is exactly the kind
of behavior
387
00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:25,777
that got you kicked out
of WizTech.
388
00:16:26,236 --> 00:16:27,612
- Dad.
- Guys, just...
389
00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:30,865
Just go upstairs, okay?
Please. Go.
390
00:16:35,203 --> 00:16:38,248
I told you not to use magic
outside of the lair.
391
00:16:38,248 --> 00:16:39,999
How am I supposed to train you
if you won't listen?
392
00:16:40,542 --> 00:16:42,127
I'll talk to Giada.
I can fix this.
393
00:16:42,127 --> 00:16:43,920
No, I will talk to Giada.
You just...
394
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:45,714
just go.
395
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,132
- But I--
- Go.
396
00:16:52,637 --> 00:16:54,264
[♪ somber instrumental music
playing]
397
00:16:57,809 --> 00:16:59,102
Guess I did jinx it.
398
00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:09,904
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
399
00:17:16,286 --> 00:17:17,537
What are you doing?
400
00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:18,997
I want to make sure
Billie's okay.
401
00:17:19,414 --> 00:17:20,665
Get back in here.
402
00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:21,875
Hey, we're not in trouble,
403
00:17:21,875 --> 00:17:23,209
and I'd like
to keep it that way.
404
00:17:26,087 --> 00:17:28,923
Billie! Billie!
405
00:17:29,549 --> 00:17:30,550
She won't come out.
406
00:17:30,884 --> 00:17:32,177
I'll get her to come out.
407
00:17:33,636 --> 00:17:36,264
Billie, the Magical Association
of Screw-ups just called.
408
00:17:36,264 --> 00:17:37,891
They want to give you an award!
409
00:17:40,477 --> 00:17:42,645
Yeah, she didn't zap me.
Maybe she's not in there.
410
00:17:49,152 --> 00:17:50,403
She's gone.
411
00:17:52,447 --> 00:17:55,408
You expect me to believe
there is a wizard world
412
00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:57,202
that exists outside of our own?
413
00:17:57,202 --> 00:17:58,870
Like Harry Potter?
414
00:17:59,120 --> 00:18:01,331
Well, not close enough
that they could sue.
415
00:18:01,331 --> 00:18:03,291
[chuckles] Right? But yeah.
416
00:18:04,501 --> 00:18:05,752
It's not funny, Justin.
417
00:18:06,252 --> 00:18:07,879
I feel like I don't even
know you.
418
00:18:08,630 --> 00:18:10,840
No. You do know me, okay?
419
00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:12,717
I am the same man
that you married.
420
00:18:13,009 --> 00:18:14,969
Except also a wizard.
421
00:18:15,595 --> 00:18:17,597
I just don't understand
why you didn't tell me.
422
00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:20,725
[hesitates] Because that part
of my life... [sighs]
423
00:18:21,810 --> 00:18:23,394
it didn't go the way
that I planned.
424
00:18:24,020 --> 00:18:27,023
So, I left it in the past.
Or at least I thought I did,
425
00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:28,274
but then Alex
showed up with Billie,
426
00:18:28,274 --> 00:18:29,526
and she asked me
to train her and--
427
00:18:29,526 --> 00:18:32,278
- Wait, Alex is a wizard?
- I know, it's shocking.
428
00:18:32,612 --> 00:18:34,572
No, that's the first thing
you said
that makes any sense.
429
00:18:34,572 --> 00:18:36,324
She's way too cool
to be a dog-walker.
430
00:18:37,826 --> 00:18:40,620
Look, I'm very sorry
that I kept this from you.
431
00:18:41,830 --> 00:18:43,206
I have so many questions.
432
00:18:43,206 --> 00:18:45,375
And I promise I will
answer them all, all right?
433
00:18:45,375 --> 00:18:47,669
No more secrets. I promise.
434
00:18:49,003 --> 00:18:50,588
Dad, did you kick Billie out?
435
00:18:50,839 --> 00:18:52,006
What? Why would you ask that?
436
00:18:53,550 --> 00:18:54,551
She said she's been kicked out
of everywhere she's ever lived.
437
00:18:54,551 --> 00:18:55,760
And she's not in the house.
438
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:56,970
Where would she go?
439
00:18:56,970 --> 00:18:58,346
She-- She's probably
just in the lair.
440
00:18:58,680 --> 00:19:00,014
We have a lair?
441
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,810
I promise you I'll explain
as soon as I'm back.
442
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:06,896
[♪ dramatic rock musical sting]
443
00:19:06,896 --> 00:19:09,315
Billie? Billie!
444
00:19:11,609 --> 00:19:12,694
Oh, no.
445
00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:14,404
Uh...
446
00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:18,408
[♪ tense instrumental music
playing]
447
00:19:21,035 --> 00:19:23,037
You know, the nice thing
about having nowhere to go
448
00:19:23,037 --> 00:19:25,331
is you can go anywhere
you want.
449
00:19:26,332 --> 00:19:28,418
Bummer is I actually liked
where I was.
450
00:19:28,418 --> 00:19:29,878
[bus approaching]
451
00:19:32,922 --> 00:19:34,799
- [♪ music concludes]
- [bus brakes hiss]
452
00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:36,801
[Justin] Billie! Billie!
453
00:19:37,510 --> 00:19:38,761
Why'd you run away?
454
00:19:40,138 --> 00:19:42,056
I know how this goes.
I mess up, and I get kicked out.
455
00:19:42,056 --> 00:19:44,434
Just like at WizTech.
I'm just saving you the trouble.
456
00:19:44,434 --> 00:19:46,853
- No, no, no, no, no.
This isn't WizTech.
- [bus departing]
457
00:19:47,645 --> 00:19:49,105
But I ruined everything.
458
00:19:49,105 --> 00:19:51,190
I did the one thing
you told me not to.
459
00:19:51,649 --> 00:19:54,193
- You made a mistake.
- I make lots of mistakes.
460
00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:56,154
[sighs]
461
00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:01,868
You're supposed to.
It's a part of growing up.
462
00:20:02,285 --> 00:20:04,287
But it doesn't mean
that I'm not going
to forgive you.
463
00:20:05,038 --> 00:20:07,123
I really did try
to keep your secret.
464
00:20:08,291 --> 00:20:10,043
I should have never asked you
to do that.
465
00:20:10,418 --> 00:20:11,920
That was my mistake.
466
00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:13,838
Also the not telling
your wife and kids.
467
00:20:13,838 --> 00:20:15,423
Also the not telling
my wife and kids, yeah.
468
00:20:17,425 --> 00:20:18,593
[sighs]
469
00:20:18,593 --> 00:20:20,386
But look,
you're not just a guest.
470
00:20:20,678 --> 00:20:23,264
You live with us,
and in our family,
471
00:20:23,264 --> 00:20:25,183
you don't get kicked out
for making a mistake.
472
00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:27,769
Now, let's get home.
473
00:20:29,354 --> 00:20:30,772
I was hoping you'd say that,
474
00:20:31,022 --> 00:20:33,107
'cause I really like
living with you guys.
475
00:20:33,107 --> 00:20:34,400
Well, I was hoping
you'd say that
476
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,736
because we really like
having you live with us.
477
00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:40,531
So, since I'm not kicked out,
478
00:20:40,531 --> 00:20:42,617
who do I talk to
about getting an allowance?
479
00:20:42,951 --> 00:20:44,786
That'd be Giada,
but I'd wait a few days.
480
00:20:44,786 --> 00:20:48,539
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
481
00:20:48,957 --> 00:20:50,291
Look who I found.
482
00:20:50,291 --> 00:20:53,211
Oh, thank goodness.
We were so worried.
483
00:20:53,211 --> 00:20:54,337
Oh!
484
00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:58,508
I don't love a group hug,
but I am glad you're back.
485
00:20:58,925 --> 00:20:59,926
Me too.
486
00:21:01,386 --> 00:21:03,012
Now, Billie, we wanted to do
something special for you,
487
00:21:03,012 --> 00:21:04,931
but I just need you to know
I did not have
accurate information
488
00:21:04,931 --> 00:21:06,099
when I was shopping.
489
00:21:06,849 --> 00:21:08,601
Yeah, that's on me.
490
00:21:08,601 --> 00:21:10,645
Sorry I wasn't honest
about who Billie really is.
491
00:21:10,645 --> 00:21:11,938
[clears throat]
492
00:21:11,938 --> 00:21:13,356
Right, or about who I really am.
493
00:21:14,649 --> 00:21:16,317
Since we're confessing things,
494
00:21:16,317 --> 00:21:19,487
when I was invisible,
I tried out a rude hand gesture.
495
00:21:19,487 --> 00:21:21,656
I didn't point it at anyone,
but I tried it.
496
00:21:24,534 --> 00:21:26,786
Okay, let's go see the room.
497
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:34,627
{\an8}I don't know what any
of this stuff is, but I love it.
498
00:21:35,294 --> 00:21:36,796
- Thank you.
- Oh!
499
00:21:39,132 --> 00:21:41,509
[sighs] Never had
my own room before.
500
00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:43,970
Yeah! Me neither.
501
00:21:43,970 --> 00:21:47,390
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
502
00:21:52,395 --> 00:21:55,523
[♪ suspenseful instrumental
music playing]
503
00:21:56,357 --> 00:21:59,152
A young wizard was here.
504
00:21:59,736 --> 00:22:02,697
I will not stop
until I find them.
505
00:22:02,989 --> 00:22:06,617
Soon, their power will be mine!
506
00:22:06,617 --> 00:22:09,579
- [laughs maniacally]
- [♪ music concludes]