1
00:00:01,167 --> 00:00:03,962
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
2
00:00:04,087 --> 00:00:05,129
[♪ music concludes]
3
00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:07,382
Okay, Woogle,
send a message to Alex.
4
00:00:07,507 --> 00:00:09,300
- [wand chimes]
- Hey, Alex.
5
00:00:09,467 --> 00:00:11,010
Don't worry, I'm not in trouble.
6
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:13,303
Actually, I've been
at your brother's house for 12 hours
7
00:00:13,304 --> 00:00:15,098
and I haven't screwed up
bad enough to get kicked out yet.
8
00:00:16,349 --> 00:00:18,100
Granted, nine of those hours
I was sleeping,
9
00:00:18,101 --> 00:00:19,394
but still, a win's a win.
10
00:00:20,770 --> 00:00:22,397
[sighs] I really wanna stay here,
11
00:00:22,522 --> 00:00:24,024
so I'm gonna be
the best guest ever.
12
00:00:24,190 --> 00:00:26,192
I'm gonna do nice stuff
and pitch in.
13
00:00:26,317 --> 00:00:27,317
I don't wanna jinx it,
14
00:00:27,318 --> 00:00:29,154
but I think this is
gonna work out.
15
00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:31,197
Then again,
I did fail my jinx final,
16
00:00:31,322 --> 00:00:32,657
so scratch that last part.
17
00:00:33,575 --> 00:00:34,784
And send.
18
00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:39,873
Let's see. Nice stuff.
19
00:00:40,915 --> 00:00:42,000
What's nice?
20
00:00:43,543 --> 00:00:45,545
Ooh! I got it. A houseplant.
21
00:00:48,089 --> 00:00:50,467
Mm. No one notices a houseplant.
22
00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:52,177
Ooh! I know.
23
00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:59,434
Too nice.
That'll get him arrested.
24
00:01:02,604 --> 00:01:03,605
[sighs]
25
00:01:05,482 --> 00:01:07,400
I'm overthinking.
I'll just keep it simple.
26
00:01:07,609 --> 00:01:09,152
Make him a nice breakfast.
27
00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:11,362
[eggs sizzling]
28
00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:14,657
[whispering] Billie!
29
00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:19,537
Aw! Are you making me eggs?
30
00:01:19,662 --> 00:01:22,123
Well, they certainly don't
make themselves.
31
00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:25,960
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
32
00:01:27,879 --> 00:01:29,297
[knock on door]
33
00:01:30,715 --> 00:01:31,800
[Billie gasps]
34
00:01:32,342 --> 00:01:35,303
An egg was scrambling itself
on my stove.
35
00:01:36,304 --> 00:01:37,889
Did you want sunny side up?
36
00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:40,475
You, lair, now.
37
00:01:43,269 --> 00:01:44,437
You were using magic.
38
00:01:44,604 --> 00:01:46,106
Isn't that why Alex
brought me here?
39
00:01:46,231 --> 00:01:47,899
So you could train me
to control my magic?
40
00:01:48,149 --> 00:01:51,193
Yeah, in the lair.
Giada almost saw.
41
00:01:51,194 --> 00:01:53,530
My wife,
she's an investigative reporter.
42
00:01:53,696 --> 00:01:55,615
She asks questions for a living.
43
00:01:55,740 --> 00:01:57,908
And I do not want her knowing
about my wizard past.
44
00:01:57,909 --> 00:02:00,410
Okay, so, so, so
in here, wizard.
45
00:02:00,411 --> 00:02:02,664
Out there, mortal. Do we got it?
46
00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:05,458
No problem, I can act
like a mortal teenager.
47
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,462
I'm literally starving.
Get out of my room.
48
00:02:09,587 --> 00:02:10,839
Where even is my charger?
49
00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:13,967
Wow, you nailed that.
50
00:02:14,717 --> 00:02:16,719
[♪ theme song playing]
51
00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:20,889
{\an8}♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪
52
00:02:20,890 --> 00:02:22,642
{\an8}♪ When you can have
what you want ♪
53
00:02:22,767 --> 00:02:24,643
{\an8}♪ By the simplest of means ♪
54
00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:27,646
{\an8}♪ Be careful not to mess
with the balance of things ♪
55
00:02:27,647 --> 00:02:32,192
{\an8}♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
56
00:02:32,193 --> 00:02:34,528
♪ You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes ♪
57
00:02:34,529 --> 00:02:37,906
♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
58
00:02:37,907 --> 00:02:39,117
♪ Yes, please ♪
59
00:02:41,202 --> 00:02:42,662
- ♪ What it seems ♪
- [♪ theme song ends]
60
00:02:42,954 --> 00:02:45,165
- Morning, Giada.
- Hey, Billie. How'd you sleep?
61
00:02:45,456 --> 00:02:47,667
Great.
Comfy mattress, cozy blanket,
62
00:02:47,792 --> 00:02:49,377
no dragon screeching
at 6:00 a.m.
63
00:02:49,627 --> 00:02:50,879
Dragon?
64
00:02:54,007 --> 00:02:56,718
{\an8}She's joking.
[chuckles nervously] It's a joke.
65
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,346
{\an8}Right, a joke. [chuckles]
66
00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:02,056
{\an8}I was joking.
67
00:03:04,934 --> 00:03:07,437
{\an8}Hey, Dad,
so it's new comic book day,
68
00:03:07,812 --> 00:03:09,563
{\an8}and Milo and I were taking stock
of our finances.
69
00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:10,982
{\an8}Turns out we don't have any.
70
00:03:12,150 --> 00:03:13,943
Dad, it occurred to us,
71
00:03:14,068 --> 00:03:15,778
we haven't been paid allowance
in two weeks.
72
00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:19,907
{\an8}Oh. Is that right?
Hey, Giada, question for you.
73
00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:22,118
When's the last time the boys
washed the dishes?
74
00:03:22,535 --> 00:03:24,829
{\an8}You know,
I think it was two weeks ago.
75
00:03:25,330 --> 00:03:26,747
Which, if I'm not mistaken,
76
00:03:26,748 --> 00:03:28,708
is also the last time
they cleaned their bathroom.
77
00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:29,876
[spits]
78
00:03:30,543 --> 00:03:32,503
{\an8}That bathroom
hasn't been cleaned in two weeks?
79
00:03:32,837 --> 00:03:34,255
{\an8}I don't wear shoes in there.
80
00:03:34,964 --> 00:03:36,132
Whoa, hold on.
81
00:03:36,257 --> 00:03:37,800
You guys aren't
paying us allowance
82
00:03:37,967 --> 00:03:39,636
{\an8}because we didn't do chores?
83
00:03:40,094 --> 00:03:42,222
{\an8}Yeah, that's how allowance works.
84
00:03:42,472 --> 00:03:45,225
{\an8}Grandma gives me money
for being cute. Just saying.
85
00:03:46,684 --> 00:03:48,937
If you want your allowance,
you have to do your chores.
86
00:03:49,103 --> 00:03:50,647
Okay, but that's gonna take forever.
87
00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:52,565
- I can help.
- Really?
88
00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:55,526
Yeah, I live here now.
I can pitch in.
89
00:03:56,194 --> 00:04:00,406
{\an8}Billie, that is so sweet.
She's been here two days, boys.
90
00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:02,533
{\an8}Two days and she's already my favorite.
91
00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:05,620
{\an8}- But I'm the favorite!
- But I'm the favorite!
92
00:04:06,204 --> 00:04:07,413
{\an8}- Wait a minute.
- Wait a minute.
93
00:04:09,332 --> 00:04:10,959
All right,
let's do these chores.
94
00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:12,126
How can I help?
95
00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:14,419
{\an8}Let's see, how could a wizard help
with chores?
96
00:04:14,420 --> 00:04:15,837
{\an8}Oh, here's an idea.
97
00:04:15,838 --> 00:04:17,840
{\an8}You could cast a spell
that does our chores for us.
98
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:20,593
I thought you didn't like her doing magic.
99
00:04:20,718 --> 00:04:23,136
{\an8}Milo, we have two weeks
of chores to do.
100
00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:24,972
{\an8}I'd let her conjure another floogie
101
00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:26,641
if it would clean our room for us.
102
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:29,185
Sorry, I can't use magic.
103
00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:31,396
What? Why?
Did you lose your wand?
104
00:04:31,562 --> 00:04:33,106
No, I still have my wand.
105
00:04:34,148 --> 00:04:35,274
Then use it.
106
00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:37,527
I'm not cleaning that bathroom.
Milo has terrible aim.
107
00:04:37,652 --> 00:04:39,612
What can I say?
It's my one flaw.
108
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,782
I told you, I can't use magic.
109
00:04:42,907 --> 00:04:44,784
- I get it, she doesn't know how.
- I know how!
110
00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:46,536
Yesterday you were all,
"I'm a powerful wizard!"
111
00:04:46,661 --> 00:04:48,161
- I am a powerful wizard!
- And today you're like,
112
00:04:48,162 --> 00:04:50,415
-"I don't know the spells to do chores."
- I know the spells.
113
00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:52,834
I just promised your dad
I wouldn't use magic, okay?
114
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,377
Our dad?
115
00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:58,548
Not because he's a wizard,
116
00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:00,550
if that's what you were thinking.
117
00:05:01,592 --> 00:05:04,304
- I wasn't. But I am now!
- Dad's a wizard?
118
00:05:04,429 --> 00:05:05,805
We gotta go talk to him about this!
119
00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:07,139
No, you can't!
120
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:09,350
- I wasn't supposed to tell you.
- Dad!
121
00:05:09,517 --> 00:05:11,184
End whisper chant
with pure devotion,
122
00:05:11,185 --> 00:05:12,853
bound by magic trapped
in slow motion.
123
00:05:12,854 --> 00:05:15,440
- [distorted] Don't...
- I gotta find a way to fix this.
124
00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:17,942
Hurry up, spit it out!
125
00:05:19,694 --> 00:05:22,238
I'm just playing, I know you
in slow motion. I'll be right back.
126
00:05:22,363 --> 00:05:24,157
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
127
00:05:24,824 --> 00:05:27,618
Hey, Justin,
I've been thinking about Billie.
128
00:05:29,287 --> 00:05:31,330
What about Billie? Like about
how she's such a neat kid
129
00:05:31,331 --> 00:05:33,666
for offering to do chores?
What a superstar, am I right?
130
00:05:34,876 --> 00:05:37,336
It's just, she's...
she's living with us now,
131
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,630
and I really don't know
anything about her.
132
00:05:39,839 --> 00:05:42,258
I'm gonna go talk to her,
ask her some follow-up questions.
133
00:05:43,134 --> 00:05:44,761
Follow-up questions? No, wait!
134
00:05:46,471 --> 00:05:48,930
She's in there doing chores,
don't bother her, you know?
135
00:05:48,931 --> 00:05:50,767
Maybe ask me, maybe...
maybe I know.
136
00:05:51,476 --> 00:05:53,644
Okay, um, where's she from?
137
00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:56,439
Oh, she's from Wiz... consin.
138
00:05:57,273 --> 00:05:58,274
Wisconsin!
139
00:05:58,483 --> 00:06:01,944
Okay, and what's she into?
Is she into music? Sports?
140
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:04,738
Sports. Yep, sports.
141
00:06:04,739 --> 00:06:07,492
- Yeah. So what's her favorite team?
- Uh...
142
00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:11,037
You know, probably, uh... the Wizards.
143
00:06:11,871 --> 00:06:14,082
- That's weird.
- Is it? Why?
144
00:06:14,665 --> 00:06:17,001
Well, she's from Wisconsin.
You'd think it'd be the Bucks.
145
00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:19,878
You'd think that, yeah, right?
You'd totally think that.
146
00:06:19,879 --> 00:06:22,090
Well, nothing I can do about it now.
147
00:06:23,132 --> 00:06:25,718
So, basketball,
that... that can't be all.
148
00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:27,512
You know, look,
I'm just gonna go talk to her.
149
00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:29,055
Of course that's not all, Giada.
150
00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:30,765
She also loves to do spell...
151
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:33,601
...ing bees. Spelling bees.
152
00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:36,062
And... And...
And the musical, The Wiz.
153
00:06:36,562 --> 00:06:38,815
And she loves her wand--
154
00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,401
...a Sykes.
155
00:06:42,151 --> 00:06:44,069
Yep, big fan of Wanda Sykes.
156
00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:45,695
Sports, comedy, arts,
and academics.
157
00:06:45,696 --> 00:06:48,074
Sounds like a well-rounded,
interesting character to me.
158
00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:50,952
So, does that answer
all your questions?
159
00:06:52,286 --> 00:06:53,329
I guess?
160
00:06:56,707 --> 00:06:57,959
[sighs in relief]
161
00:06:58,209 --> 00:06:59,668
I cannot believe I made up
that whole backstory
162
00:06:59,669 --> 00:07:01,421
like right off the top of my head.
163
00:07:02,213 --> 00:07:03,339
[exhales deeply]
164
00:07:03,923 --> 00:07:06,091
Should I do improv?
No, that's ridiculous.
165
00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:07,385
I should teach improv.
166
00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:14,307
[sighs] Gotta find a way
167
00:07:14,308 --> 00:07:16,352
to make the boys forget
what I told them.
168
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,646
Oh! They got Wizardpedia.
169
00:07:20,022 --> 00:07:21,983
Welcome to Wizardpedia,
170
00:07:22,358 --> 00:07:24,735
the all-knowing
wizard encyclopedia.
171
00:07:24,986 --> 00:07:27,529
I need an erasing spell,
not because I messed up,
172
00:07:27,530 --> 00:07:29,240
but I will be clearing
the search history.
173
00:07:30,074 --> 00:07:31,826
I've got an erasing potion!
174
00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:35,663
- Perfect!
- Section one, history. [clears throat]
175
00:07:36,038 --> 00:07:38,415
The first recorded use
of an erasing potion was--
176
00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:39,666
No time.
177
00:07:39,667 --> 00:07:41,252
- In many cultures--
- No time!
178
00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:44,421
Well, I do have a formula,
179
00:07:44,422 --> 00:07:46,591
but I don't suppose
you have the time for that.
180
00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:48,092
Quit playing, Wizardpedia.
181
00:07:48,926 --> 00:07:50,344
[chuckles] Very well.
182
00:07:51,345 --> 00:07:56,016
Two parts moonlight,
one part dragon scale,
183
00:07:56,017 --> 00:07:58,769
and a pinch of shadow mist.
184
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:03,774
Now, gently,
very gently mix the--
185
00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:05,067
Oh! Oh!
186
00:08:05,234 --> 00:08:07,944
Or just do that. What do I know?
187
00:08:07,945 --> 00:08:09,321
I'm only
the collective knowledge
188
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,240
of thousands
of years of wizardry.
189
00:08:12,617 --> 00:08:16,287
Now, all I gotta do is splash the guys
and their memories will be erased.
190
00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:18,956
Wait, you want to erase their memory?
191
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:21,125
Oh, boy.
192
00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:22,543
[♪ upbeat instrumental music playing]
193
00:08:24,795 --> 00:08:26,129
[♪ music concludes]
194
00:08:26,130 --> 00:08:28,006
Hey, Billie.
You settling in okay?
195
00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:30,927
Me? Yup. Settling in great.
Well, good talking to you.
196
00:08:31,385 --> 00:08:32,470
Hold on a second.
197
00:08:33,262 --> 00:08:36,807
I think we should talk
about this whole Wizards thing.
198
00:08:37,558 --> 00:08:38,893
What? How do you know about that?
199
00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:40,186
Justin told me.
200
00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:42,021
Justin told you about wizards?
201
00:08:42,271 --> 00:08:43,939
Yeah. And, you know,
it's not a big deal.
202
00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:45,816
But I just-- I wouldn't
go around telling everybody.
203
00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,151
I wouldn't. I would never.
204
00:08:47,318 --> 00:08:49,110
'Cause, you know,
you're living in Staten Island now,
205
00:08:49,111 --> 00:08:51,197
so your choices
are really only the Knicks or the Nets.
206
00:08:52,573 --> 00:08:53,616
The what and the heh?
207
00:08:54,867 --> 00:08:57,328
Basketball? Justin said the Wizards
are your favorite team.
208
00:08:57,828 --> 00:09:01,749
Right! The Wizards.
Go basketball! See ya.
209
00:09:03,584 --> 00:09:04,961
"Go basketball"?
210
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:06,546
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
211
00:09:07,004 --> 00:09:09,047
- [distorted] Don't...
- [♪ music concludes]
212
00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:12,385
Slow no more, swift restored,
back to full speed, I implore!
213
00:09:12,969 --> 00:09:15,096
...you dare cast a spell on us,
214
00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:18,057
is what I was gonna say
before you cast a spell on us.
215
00:09:19,183 --> 00:09:22,186
I can't believe Dad's
a wizard! Dad!
216
00:09:22,770 --> 00:09:24,605
You can't tell him
that I told you.
217
00:09:24,730 --> 00:09:27,316
This isn't the kind of information
you just, like, forget.
218
00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:30,570
It is now. In a second,
you'll forget everything.
219
00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:32,655
Why'd you do that?
220
00:09:33,531 --> 00:09:35,116
- What is this?
- Erasing potion.
221
00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:36,951
- Give me that.
- [crashes]
222
00:09:37,994 --> 00:09:41,372
Please tell me you know a spell
for a new pair of chinos.
223
00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:44,375
[Milo] It didn't work.
I still know Dad's a wizard.
224
00:09:45,918 --> 00:09:49,255
Something got erased.
Milo, your top half is gone.
225
00:09:49,505 --> 00:09:51,549
[Milo] Roman, your bottom half is gone.
226
00:09:52,842 --> 00:09:56,887
Billie, you didn't erase
our memories, you erased us!
227
00:09:57,179 --> 00:09:58,806
Any chance I erased me?
228
00:09:58,973 --> 00:10:00,473
- No!
- Dang it!
229
00:10:00,474 --> 00:10:04,645
[♪ upbeat rock music playing,
concluding]
230
00:10:05,062 --> 00:10:07,648
[Milo] This is a nightmare,
Monday's picture day!
231
00:10:08,024 --> 00:10:09,983
- I can fix this.
- Are you crazy?
232
00:10:09,984 --> 00:10:11,110
You're the one who did it!
233
00:10:11,235 --> 00:10:13,695
In my defense, I was looking
for an erasing potion,
234
00:10:13,696 --> 00:10:15,323
not an erasing potion!
235
00:10:15,573 --> 00:10:17,783
Oh, I see where the mix-up happened.
236
00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:20,578
Dad's a wizard,
he can fix this.
237
00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:22,287
No, please,
don't tell your dad.
238
00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:23,497
Why not?
239
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:25,708
Come on, Milo.
240
00:10:25,875 --> 00:10:27,251
I don't wanna
get kicked out, okay?
241
00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:28,878
[Milo] Kicked out?
242
00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:30,713
It's happened
at every other place I live.
243
00:10:30,921 --> 00:10:32,256
I mess up, and I get kicked out.
244
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,507
- My dad wouldn't do that.
- Really?
245
00:10:34,508 --> 00:10:37,469
What would you do if the kid you took in
blew your biggest secret
246
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,597
and turned your sons
half invisible?
247
00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:41,139
[Milo] If it makes you feel any better,
248
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:43,184
I like to think of us
as half visible.
249
00:10:44,185 --> 00:10:45,685
Please, you can't tell.
250
00:10:45,686 --> 00:10:48,105
I have nowhere else to go,
just let me fix this.
251
00:10:48,564 --> 00:10:50,149
Okay, fine, but you owe me.
252
00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:53,027
In addition to the legs
you already owe me.
253
00:10:54,111 --> 00:10:56,196
- Thank you.
- [Giada] Hey, guys.
254
00:10:56,197 --> 00:10:57,406
It's your mom. Hide!
255
00:11:01,118 --> 00:11:03,621
Hey, Giada, nothing to see here.
256
00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:05,289
I mean everything to see here
257
00:11:05,456 --> 00:11:08,209
because it's all here,
and you can see it.
258
00:11:09,293 --> 00:11:10,293
Good to know.
259
00:11:10,294 --> 00:11:12,546
Roman, if you see your father,
tell him I'm in the garage.
260
00:11:12,755 --> 00:11:14,423
And don't forget
to do the dishes.
261
00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,008
[Milo] I'm on it, Mom.
262
00:11:18,135 --> 00:11:19,136
Was that Milo?
263
00:11:19,261 --> 00:11:21,554
Uh, yeah, you just missed him.
264
00:11:21,555 --> 00:11:24,766
He ran upstairs
to go clean the... shower.
265
00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:26,644
[scoffs] Clean the shower?
266
00:11:26,769 --> 00:11:28,978
Billie, you are such
a good influence.
267
00:11:28,979 --> 00:11:30,481
[scoffs] You might wanna wait
268
00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:32,608
till you get all the facts
on that one, Mom.
269
00:11:35,486 --> 00:11:37,655
[Milo] Phew!
Thought we were busted for sure.
270
00:11:38,155 --> 00:11:40,241
- [Justin] Giada?
- We still might be.
271
00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:46,831
Hey, Justin, Giada wanted us
to tell you she's in the garage.
272
00:11:47,164 --> 00:11:48,249
The garage?
273
00:11:48,416 --> 00:11:49,458
Okay, I'll be back.
274
00:11:50,126 --> 00:11:51,918
And Milo, how many times
do I gotta tell you?
275
00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:54,255
Figure out what you want
before you open up the fridge.
276
00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:55,965
[Milo] I did, string cheese.
277
00:11:56,132 --> 00:11:58,801
That's what my fully visible
top half is looking for.
278
00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:01,010
Well, save some for me,
279
00:12:01,011 --> 00:12:03,055
'cause my fully visible top half
will want some later.
280
00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:06,642
- [door opens, closes]
- [sighs] Okay.
281
00:12:07,143 --> 00:12:08,394
Time to un-disappear you.
282
00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:11,020
Where's my wand?
283
00:12:11,021 --> 00:12:12,815
It was in my hand
when you spilled the--
284
00:12:12,940 --> 00:12:15,108
Oh, no. My wand's invisible!
285
00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:16,569
Okay, well, we have to find it!
286
00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:18,988
- [Milo] I found it!
- My wand?
287
00:12:19,155 --> 00:12:21,073
[Milo] No. The string cheese.
288
00:12:22,158 --> 00:12:23,658
Now, I just gotta find my mouth.
289
00:12:23,659 --> 00:12:24,952
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
290
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:27,872
[♪ music concludes]
291
00:12:28,205 --> 00:12:31,292
Giada? You in here?
292
00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:36,464
Hello, Justin.
Please, have a seat.
293
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:41,051
After our earlier conversation
about Billie,
294
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:45,014
I couldn't help feeling
like something's up.
295
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:46,766
Oh, no.
296
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:49,310
That's bright.
297
00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:54,482
So, I'd like to ask you
some follow-up questions.
298
00:12:56,150 --> 00:12:57,610
Follow-up questions.
299
00:12:58,694 --> 00:13:00,320
So, let me get this straight.
300
00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:02,405
You're saying
that Alex met Billie
301
00:13:02,406 --> 00:13:03,948
at a dog-walking conference,
302
00:13:03,949 --> 00:13:06,869
and took her under her wing
because, and I quote,
303
00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:10,206
"Billie is the most
powerful dog-walker ever"?
304
00:13:10,956 --> 00:13:11,998
Is that what I said?
305
00:13:11,999 --> 00:13:14,376
I mean, if you said I said it,
then I must have said it, so...
306
00:13:14,710 --> 00:13:15,753
Is it hot in here?
307
00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:18,671
Yeah, the thing is,
I did a search
308
00:13:18,672 --> 00:13:21,049
and there hasn't been
a dog-walking conference in Wisconsin
309
00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:23,052
since 1962.
310
00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:25,053
Are you sure about that?
311
00:13:25,054 --> 00:13:26,722
Did you check the whole internet?
312
00:13:27,181 --> 00:13:28,515
You're not making sense.
313
00:13:28,516 --> 00:13:30,350
I mean, this girl
is living in our house,
314
00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:31,559
and I don't know
anything about her.
315
00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:32,727
Well, Billie and I are both wizards.
316
00:13:32,728 --> 00:13:34,647
I just want to know
what color pillows she likes.
317
00:13:34,855 --> 00:13:36,898
- Did you say "pillows"?
- Did you say "wizards"?
318
00:13:36,899 --> 00:13:39,484
I said lizards.
Green. Lizard green.
319
00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:40,945
Yeah, that's a color.
320
00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:43,072
Tell me more
about these pillows.
321
00:13:43,531 --> 00:13:45,406
Well, no, you know,
I just want to know what she likes
322
00:13:45,407 --> 00:13:47,117
because I want to be able
to redecorate her room
323
00:13:47,243 --> 00:13:48,536
so she'll feel more at home.
324
00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:50,996
That's why you're interrogating me?
325
00:13:51,372 --> 00:13:52,665
Interrogating you?
326
00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:55,876
Oh, honey, if I were interrogating you,
you'd be crying.
327
00:13:57,336 --> 00:14:00,965
Exactly. And I'm not crying
at all, so... [sniffles]
328
00:14:01,090 --> 00:14:02,383
Why don't we go check out
these pillows?
329
00:14:02,550 --> 00:14:04,008
Okay, I'll go grab my keys.
330
00:14:04,009 --> 00:14:05,678
Good, yeah, you drive, 'cause...
331
00:14:06,345 --> 00:14:07,680
I got something in my eye.
332
00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:09,014
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
333
00:14:10,599 --> 00:14:11,725
[♪ music concludes]
334
00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:12,977
Where's my wand?
335
00:14:13,269 --> 00:14:15,688
[Milo] It'd be so much easier
to find if we could see it.
336
00:14:17,565 --> 00:14:18,691
- [grunts]
- [object clatters]
337
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:22,069
God, Milo,
I tripped on your dumb legs.
338
00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:23,236
How'd you do that?
339
00:14:23,237 --> 00:14:25,322
They're the one part
of him you can see.
340
00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:28,658
[Milo] Uh, guys? The bottle!
341
00:14:28,659 --> 00:14:30,118
The potion
must've made it disappear
342
00:14:30,119 --> 00:14:31,203
when you guys were fighting.
343
00:14:31,495 --> 00:14:33,247
But the flour made it visible.
344
00:14:33,539 --> 00:14:35,374
That's it.
That's how we find my wand!
345
00:14:35,499 --> 00:14:37,542
Do you guys have anything else
powdery around here?
346
00:14:37,543 --> 00:14:39,752
A pouch of nibble warts?
Some ground shibble sticks?
347
00:14:39,753 --> 00:14:43,465
A card to the Wally Gog?
No Wally Gog?
348
00:14:45,050 --> 00:14:46,427
There's baking soda in the fridge.
349
00:14:46,552 --> 00:14:49,763
[chuckles] Baking soda,
that's a funny word.
350
00:14:51,390 --> 00:14:53,017
[Justin] Boys, can you give me a hand?
351
00:14:53,267 --> 00:14:54,310
Somebody's gotta stall him.
352
00:14:54,643 --> 00:14:57,688
- [Milo] Coming, Daddy!
- What? Not you, Milo!
353
00:14:58,397 --> 00:14:59,939
- [Milo] Hey, Dad!
- Hey, Dad!
354
00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:01,066
[Justin] Hey, guys.
355
00:15:02,484 --> 00:15:04,278
Do some shopping, did we?
356
00:15:06,113 --> 00:15:07,573
Are you wearing Milo's pants?
357
00:15:09,783 --> 00:15:14,288
I suppose in this instance,
it would appear that I am.
358
00:15:16,457 --> 00:15:18,208
Come on, wand, where are you?
359
00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:20,294
There you are.
360
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:23,087
[Justin] Hey, can you boys
give me a hand with these bags?
361
00:15:23,088 --> 00:15:24,590
[chuckles] Sure thing, Dad.
362
00:15:25,132 --> 00:15:26,759
Okay, we have to move
in perfect unison.
363
00:15:26,884 --> 00:15:30,054
On three, step left.
One, two, three.
364
00:15:31,555 --> 00:15:32,598
Why didn't you go left?
365
00:15:32,890 --> 00:15:35,017
[Milo] It's not my fault.
I can't see my hands.
366
00:15:35,184 --> 00:15:36,602
I don't know
which one makes the L.
367
00:15:38,395 --> 00:15:40,188
Roman? Milo?
368
00:15:40,189 --> 00:15:42,107
Dad, it's not what it looks like!
369
00:15:42,232 --> 00:15:45,027
Found my wand! [gasps]
Justin, it's not what it looks like!
370
00:15:45,361 --> 00:15:46,653
Giada is right outside.
371
00:15:46,654 --> 00:15:48,739
Quick, give me your wand!
Revealus!
372
00:15:50,991 --> 00:15:52,451
- Justin?
- Giada!
373
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:54,203
It's not what it looks like!
374
00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:57,247
You just did magic!
375
00:15:57,373 --> 00:15:58,958
Okay, it is what it looks like.
376
00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:01,835
Justin, what is going on?
377
00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:03,045
Look,
378
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:04,796
there's something
that I should have told you
379
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:06,173
a long time ago.
380
00:16:07,257 --> 00:16:08,300
I'm a wizard.
381
00:16:08,926 --> 00:16:10,177
[softly scoffs] A wizard?
382
00:16:11,136 --> 00:16:13,013
I know. It sounds crazy.
383
00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:14,514
Yes, it does.
384
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:15,599
But it's true.
385
00:16:16,433 --> 00:16:19,769
I don't even...
I don't even know what this is.
386
00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:21,438
Giada. Giada, wait. I...
387
00:16:22,147 --> 00:16:23,898
- Justin, I'm sorry. I didn't--
- What were you thinking?
388
00:16:23,899 --> 00:16:25,233
This is exactly the kind
of behavior
389
00:16:25,234 --> 00:16:26,402
that got you kicked out
of WizTech.
390
00:16:26,860 --> 00:16:28,237
- Dad.
- Guys, just...
391
00:16:28,612 --> 00:16:31,490
Just go upstairs, okay?
Please. Go.
392
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:38,831
I told you not to use magic
outside of the lair.
393
00:16:38,956 --> 00:16:40,624
How am I supposed to train you
if you won't listen?
394
00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:42,710
I'll talk to Giada. I can fix this.
395
00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:46,338
No, I will talk to Giada.
You just... just go.
396
00:16:46,630 --> 00:16:47,756
- But I--
- Go.
397
00:16:53,303 --> 00:16:56,432
[♪ somber instrumental music playing]
398
00:16:58,434 --> 00:16:59,727
Guess I did jinx it.
399
00:17:06,817 --> 00:17:08,110
[♪ music concludes]
400
00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:10,070
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
401
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:16,994
[♪ music concludes]
402
00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:18,746
Hey. What are you doing?
403
00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:20,247
I want to make sure
Billie's okay.
404
00:17:20,664 --> 00:17:21,790
Get back in here.
405
00:17:21,999 --> 00:17:24,376
Hey, we're not in trouble,
and I'd like to keep it that way.
406
00:17:27,337 --> 00:17:30,174
Billie! Billie!
407
00:17:30,799 --> 00:17:31,800
She won't come out.
408
00:17:32,134 --> 00:17:33,427
I'll get her to come out.
409
00:17:34,136 --> 00:17:37,513
Billie, the Magical Association
of Screw Ups just called.
410
00:17:37,514 --> 00:17:39,141
They want to give you an award!
411
00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:43,896
Yeah, she didn't zap me.
Maybe she's not in there.
412
00:17:50,402 --> 00:17:51,653
She's gone.
413
00:17:53,697 --> 00:17:56,657
You expect me to believe
there is a wizard world
414
00:17:56,658 --> 00:17:58,451
that exists outside of our own?
415
00:17:58,452 --> 00:18:00,120
Like Harry Potter?
416
00:18:00,370 --> 00:18:02,914
Well, not close enough
that they could sue. [chuckles nervously]
417
00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:04,541
Right? But yeah.
418
00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:07,002
It's not funny, Justin.
419
00:18:07,503 --> 00:18:09,129
I feel like I don't even
know you.
420
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:12,049
No. You do know me, okay?
421
00:18:12,174 --> 00:18:13,967
I am the same man
that you married.
422
00:18:14,259 --> 00:18:16,220
Except also a wizard.
423
00:18:16,845 --> 00:18:18,846
I just don't understand
why you didn't tell me.
424
00:18:18,847 --> 00:18:21,975
[stammers] Because that part
of my life... [sighs]
425
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:24,645
it didn't go the way
that I planned.
426
00:18:25,270 --> 00:18:28,314
So, I left it in the past.
Or at least I thought I did,
427
00:18:28,315 --> 00:18:29,524
but then Alex
showed up with Billie,
428
00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:30,651
and she asked me
to train her--
429
00:18:30,776 --> 00:18:33,529
- Wait, Alex is a wizard?
- I know, it's shocking.
430
00:18:33,862 --> 00:18:35,822
No, that's the first thing
you said that makes any sense.
431
00:18:35,823 --> 00:18:37,574
She's way too cool
to be a dog-walker.
432
00:18:39,076 --> 00:18:41,870
Look, I'm very sorry
that I kept this from you.
433
00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:44,414
I have so many questions.
434
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:46,624
And I promise I will
answer them all, all right?
435
00:18:46,625 --> 00:18:48,919
No more secrets. I promise.
436
00:18:50,254 --> 00:18:51,839
Dad, did you kick Billie out?
437
00:18:52,089 --> 00:18:53,257
What? Why would you ask that?
438
00:18:53,423 --> 00:18:55,759
She said she's been kicked out
of everywhere she's ever lived.
439
00:18:55,884 --> 00:18:56,969
And she's not in the house.
440
00:18:57,094 --> 00:18:58,219
Where would she go?
441
00:18:58,220 --> 00:18:59,596
She's probably just in the lair.
442
00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:01,265
- We have a lair?
- We have a lair?
443
00:19:02,891 --> 00:19:05,018
I promise you I'll explain
as soon as I'm back.
444
00:19:05,352 --> 00:19:07,980
[♪ dramatic rock musical sting]
445
00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:10,566
Billie? Billie!
446
00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:13,944
Oh, no.
447
00:19:15,946 --> 00:19:19,449
[♪ tense instrumental music playing]
448
00:19:19,658 --> 00:19:22,201
[♪ mysterious instrumental music playing]
449
00:19:22,202 --> 00:19:24,287
You know, the nice thing
about having nowhere to go
450
00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:26,582
is you can go anywhere you want.
451
00:19:27,583 --> 00:19:29,585
Bummer is I actually liked where I was.
452
00:19:29,751 --> 00:19:31,128
[bus approaching]
453
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,758
- [♪ music concludes]
- [bus brakes hiss]
454
00:19:36,925 --> 00:19:38,051
[Justin] Billie! Billie!
455
00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:40,012
Why'd you run away?
456
00:19:40,637 --> 00:19:43,306
I know how this goes.
I mess up, and I get kicked out.
457
00:19:43,307 --> 00:19:45,641
Just like at WizTech.
I'm just saving you the trouble.
458
00:19:45,642 --> 00:19:48,061
- No, no, no, no, no. This isn't WizTech.
- [bus departing]
459
00:19:48,896 --> 00:19:50,314
But I ruined everything.
460
00:19:50,439 --> 00:19:52,441
I did the one thing
you told me not to.
461
00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:55,444
- You made a mistake.
- I make lots of mistakes.
462
00:19:56,236 --> 00:19:57,404
[sighs]
463
00:20:00,365 --> 00:20:03,118
You're supposed to.
It's a part of growing up.
464
00:20:03,535 --> 00:20:05,537
But it doesn't mean
that I'm not going to forgive you.
465
00:20:06,288 --> 00:20:08,582
- I really did try to keep your secret.
- [♪ gentle instrumental music playing]
466
00:20:09,541 --> 00:20:11,501
I should have never asked you to do that.
467
00:20:11,668 --> 00:20:13,169
That was my mistake.
468
00:20:13,170 --> 00:20:15,087
Also the not telling
your wife and kids.
469
00:20:15,088 --> 00:20:16,673
Also the not telling
my wife and kids, yeah.
470
00:20:18,675 --> 00:20:19,801
[sighs]
471
00:20:19,927 --> 00:20:21,637
But look, you're not just a guest.
472
00:20:21,929 --> 00:20:24,513
You live with us,
and in our family,
473
00:20:24,514 --> 00:20:26,433
you don't get kicked out
for making a mistake.
474
00:20:27,768 --> 00:20:29,019
Now, let's get home.
475
00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:32,022
I was hoping you'd say that,
476
00:20:32,272 --> 00:20:34,357
'cause I really like
living with you guys.
477
00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:35,650
Well, I was hoping
you'd say that
478
00:20:35,651 --> 00:20:37,986
because we really like
having you live with us.
479
00:20:40,530 --> 00:20:41,781
So, since I'm not kicked out,
480
00:20:41,782 --> 00:20:43,867
who do I talk to
about getting an allowance?
481
00:20:44,201 --> 00:20:45,952
That'd be Giada,
but I'd wait a few days.
482
00:20:45,953 --> 00:20:47,537
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
483
00:20:50,123 --> 00:20:51,540
- [♪ music concludes]
- Look who I found.
484
00:20:51,541 --> 00:20:54,419
Oh, thank goodness.
We were so worried.
485
00:20:54,544 --> 00:20:55,545
Oh!
486
00:20:55,921 --> 00:20:59,758
I don't love a group hug,
but I am glad you're back.
487
00:21:00,175 --> 00:21:01,175
Me too.
488
00:21:01,176 --> 00:21:03,552
Now, Billie, we wanted
to do something special for you,
489
00:21:03,553 --> 00:21:05,137
but I just need you to know
I did not have
490
00:21:05,138 --> 00:21:07,349
accurate information
when I was shopping.
491
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:09,850
Yeah, that's on me.
492
00:21:09,851 --> 00:21:11,812
Sorry I wasn't honest
about who Billie really is.
493
00:21:11,979 --> 00:21:13,105
[clears throat]
494
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:14,606
Right, or about who I really am.
495
00:21:15,899 --> 00:21:17,566
Since we're confessing things,
496
00:21:17,567 --> 00:21:20,612
when I was invisible,
I tried out a rude hand gesture.
497
00:21:20,821 --> 00:21:22,906
I didn't point it at anyone,
but I tried it.
498
00:21:25,784 --> 00:21:28,036
Okay, let's go see the room.
499
00:21:33,792 --> 00:21:35,877
{\an8}I don't know what any of this stuff is,
but I love it.
500
00:21:36,503 --> 00:21:38,005
- Thank you.
- Oh!
501
00:21:40,382 --> 00:21:42,759
[sighs] Never had my own room before.
502
00:21:43,051 --> 00:21:45,178
- Yeah! Me neither.
- Yeah! Me neither.
503
00:21:45,345 --> 00:21:46,763
[♪ upbeat rock music playing]
504
00:21:49,099 --> 00:21:50,267
[♪ music concludes]
505
00:21:51,143 --> 00:21:52,144
[bus brakes hiss]
506
00:21:53,645 --> 00:21:56,773
[♪ mysterious instrumental music playing]
507
00:21:57,607 --> 00:22:00,402
[Phantomus] A young wizard was here.
508
00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:03,947
I will not stop
until I find them.
509
00:22:04,239 --> 00:22:07,867
Soon, their power will be mine!
510
00:22:07,868 --> 00:22:10,245
- [laughs maniacally]
- [lightening crashes]
511
00:22:10,537 --> 00:22:11,580
[♪ music concludes]