[theme song playing]
[Ewan] Across 20 years, and three incredible adventures,
we've traveled to some of the farthest flung corners of the world.
This is us on the road, Charley. This is us on the way, man.
Yet we've never properly explored the countries on our own doorstep.
- Okay, here we go. Into Europe. - [Charley] Let's do it.
So, we're spending the summer riding a spectacular loop
through 17 of our closest neighbors.
[Ewan] Starting at my house in Scotland, we'll cross over to the continent,
travel up through the Nordics, and into the Arctic Circle,
down to the Baltics before winding our way through the Alps and across France,
returning home about two months later.
[Charley] And we're gonna throw caution to the wind
by doing the journey on temperamental 50-year-old bikes
that have been given a new lease of life.
[Ewan] My bike's making a funny noise.
[bike clangs]
[Russ] Riding alongside them on a third motorcycle
are cameramen Claudio and Max.
And the guys will also be taking personal diary cameras.
[David] Russ and I will be following with a small crew and two electric trucks.
Only meeting up with the guys when necessary.
[cheering]
[Ewan] So, this summer, Europe is our playground.
- Wow! - [blowing]
[Ewan] And we're gonna follow our noses and see what we find on the open road.
We're in Austria now.
[Charley] Feeling a little peckish.
What's Austria's national dish?
[Ewan] Well, I think it's a schnitzel and, uh, apple strudel.
[Charley] Oh, yeah. Schnitzel and strudel.
[Ewan] To end our trip on a high,
we're heading to Europe's biggest mountain range,
the Alps.
Starting in Austria,
we'll sweep through Switzerland,
and then up through France on our way home.
First off, a quick pit stop in Vienna.
♪ Oh, Vienna ♪
Oy. [chuckles]
My butt is really sore.
I'll move forward, Ewan, and you can pat my butt. [laughs]
- [Ewan] Is that better? - That's better. Thank you.
[both laugh]
[Charley] What's this river called again?
- [Ewan] Oh, the Danube. Yeah. The Danube. - The Danube. The Danube.
Oh, yes.
[vocalizing, whistling "The Blue Danube"]
- This is what I imagined it looked like. - Yeah.
[Ewan] Vienna.
[Charley] Here we are, Vienna.
City of Dreams, City of Music,
and fortunately for us, a city famous for its cakes.
Oh, look at that. That was synchronized parking, that was.
[Ewan] We've been told about an interesting little cafè
that serves some of the best pastries in town.
It's run by old-age pensioners.
- Is this it? - Look. With that little granny face.
[Ewan] Ah. Brilliant. Run by the old ladies.
Or maybe old men too. I don't know.
- Look at all the furniture. - That's wicked.
- It's your first time here? - [both] Yes.
- Yes? Please sit down. - This one?
- Oh yes, yes. - Oh, wonderful.
Thank you. Oh, lovely.
[Marianne] Look around, it's grandmother's dining room.
We are a cafe for old and young.
Old and young work together.
Do you enjoy it?
- Yes, I like it, I like it… - It's fun, yeah.
I've ten years at the cafe.
Ten years you've been?
Yes, now, what can I bring you, a special coffee or…
- Yes, please. Go on, Charley. - Yes. I'll go look at the coffee.
Please, I will ask you to please sit down…
…now I will ask you…
- Okay. - [chuckles, stammers]
You both ride motorbikes?
Yes, we ride motorbikes.
Oh, when I was young I looked everywhere for a man with a motorbike…
- Oh. - I didn't find him.
- You didn't find one? - No.
- You've got them now. - Two.
Oh no! I am too old.
- [Charley] Hello. Hiya. - [employee] Hiya!
[Charley] Yeah. Could I take a piece of this please?
- Apple strudel? Yeah? - Apple strudel. Yeah, please. Thank you.
- Cream? - Cream. Yes, please.
- Cream, yeah? - Cream, yes.
We have an expression in Scotland.
"Eat up. You're at your auntie's."
This is a bit like that.
"Eat up, you're at your auntie's."
Thank you. [moans]
- [Ewan] Is that apple strudel? - Yeah.
Oh. Can I have a bite?
- Oh, it's very good. Mmm. - It's good, isn't it? Yeah.
[Charley] Mmm.
- Bloody hell. - That's a good one.
These are our special cakes from Vienna.
- Oh-Oh… Is that-- - Oh, my God.
- Is that custard? - These buns…
…inside is hot plum marmalade…
…and hot vanilla sauce.
- Oh, my gosh. - Vanilla sauce. Oh, my gosh.
Is that like yogurt?
That's… No, that's, um… [chuckles]
- Oh. - [Ewan] Right down the jeans.
[Charley] It's good crème anglaise.
- My God, it's so good. - Would you like the washing machine?
- Yes. - [all laughing]
Grandma, could you just throw mine in the quick cycle?
Yes, it will be with you shortly.
[Ewan] Thank you so much. Oh, my gosh.
- Let's steal a bit of that one. - Mmm.
- [applauds] - Thank you very much. Lovely.
It even looks like something your granny would've made for you.
Look. Isn't it?
So, basically there are two motivations.
One is financial poverty.
If you're 65 plus and need some additional income,
- there are-- There's nothing. - [Charley] There's nothing.
- And the other one is social poverty. - Yeah.
When people stay active, having a meaningful activity to do,
- then we stay healthy a lot longer. - [Charley] Healthy.
- [Ewan] Yeah. - Congratulations.
You're making it work. So, good for you.
And helping so many people along the way.
- And your custard is outrageously good. - Yeah.
- You like it? - [Ewan] The custard's very, very good.
Of course it is.
- It's like Granny's custard. - Granny's custard, yeah.
[Ewan] Fantastic. I've eaten all the custard. I'm so sorry.
- Oh, no, no. That's fine. - I didn't leave any…
- Not really any crème anglaise for you. - [chuckles]
- Sorry, Charley. - But the, uh…
- What a great idea. Isn't it lovely? - Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
- [Charley] This way, right? - [Ewan] Yeah.
[Charley] Here, Ewan. You take the lead, Ewan.
Right.
[Ewan] I've just scranned so much food.
[Charley] I know. Me too. I feel absolutely like I've got a food baby.
[Ewan] Yeah, I'd like to just go and lie down.
[Charley] I'd like to pass out right now. Yeah.
[Ewan] Time for some proper Austrian culture.
And for that, we're going up into the mountains.
During the summer, this amazing landscape
becomes a natural backdrop for an array of plays and concerts.
And we've been invited to a sneak preview
of a brand-new opera being staged on a lake.
[Charley] It is such a beautiful part of the world, Austria. I love it.
Oof!
[Ewan] This opera is about a merman who falls for a salt maiden
and is loosely based on an old folktale
about how valuable salt deposits were found in this very lake.
- [Ewan] Wow, look at this. - This is nice, isn't it?
Yeah.
[Charley] Oh, look. There she is out there. That's the salt woman, right?
That's who the merman's looking for.
[Ewan] There's the other cast.
- Wow. - In the boat.
[Charley] Look at that.
I sent this legend to Vanni Moretto.
And he decided to compose an opera for us.
And I found Andreas, who is our director.
[crew members chattering]
[Ewan] Thanks for letting us watch today.
It's the first rehearsal.
- First rehearsal at the lake. - Yeah. Is it exciting?
- [Andreas] Yeah. - [Ewan] Great. Good luck.
[vocalizing]
[trilling]
That's the most basic one. [laughs]
This is exactly where the legend takes place.
So, you know… [chuckles]
…it's something really exciting, in a way, to be here.
Okay. And, go!
♪ Ho hey, friends! Hey take courage! ♪
♪ Lower the nets, pull with strength. ♪
Thank you! Let's do it until this point.
Thank you. Thank you.
[in German] Can you, Johanna, pull the boat back a little bit?
Can you do that in the water?
[in English] And, go!
[piano music playing]
- [Ewan] He's the one who's seen the… - Right.
- …the water man? - Right. He's seen something in the water
that is strange.
[music continues]
Not on the line between me and the singer, please.
Get out of the line.
Please, get out.
[music stops]
- You did a great job with the boat. - [chuckles] Thank you.
- Yeah. - It was a bit unexpected.
You were hauling it back on your own
- at one point. - Strong.
[singing in German]
[Andreas, in English] Okay. Let's stop here. That's a good break.
- [Ewan] Brilliant. Break a leg! - Brilliant.
- Have a great time. - Thank you.
And thank you very much for letting us observe this morning.
That was really special. Thank you.
[Charley] Now, that is the way to see an opera.
[Ewan] It's magnificent. Really, really like it here.
This is some of the most staggeringly beautiful landscape in the world.
And while I'm here,
I can't miss the opportunity to practice a new passion of mine.
I'm very excited about the paragliding tomorrow.
I'm absolutely passionate about it.
Because my dream, ultimately, is to climb the mountains of Scotland
and fly down them.
That's why I really want to learn to be a good pilot.
Today is the day.
I took a course, and I went up to Santa Barbara and learned to paraglide.
And I'm not quite certified yet, but I'm close.
Gonna start up here, fly out here.
Lose height here. Down.
And then land somewhere over there.
[chuckling]
Oh. The conditions are gorgeous. [chuckles]
Okay. Here we are.
This is the launch site here. Oh, here we go.
- It's a bit higher than Santa Barbara. - [Charley laughs]
Shall I do some lefts and rights
- to wait for you? - You don't have to.
You'll be descending.
- As soon as you're okay, I'll go. - [Ewan] Okay.
And if I fluff up the launch, um,
well, then you're on your own.
[laughs] What am I doing? Who thought this was a good idea?
Into a knot, twist it up.
We're doing tandem. So, I thought it'd be nice to fly with Ewan.
And, uh, I was down there, and now I'm up here.
And I was all confident down there.
[Ewan] The sew-up's super lightweight, there's no clips.
This just hooks in there like that.
And then this goes over to lock it.
Little elastic, and that's it.
- So, Ewan. - Yeah?
You can take off whenever you're comfortable with whatever wind you like.
He's done a couple of hundred of these, so I'm quite happy.
["Floating Parade" playing]
[Ewan vocalizes]
Wow.
[Charley] How beautiful.
[Ewan] So, when steering in a paraglider, you lean first.
That instigates the turn. A little bit of break.
And you come around.
Relax your legs, Ewan. Relax.
Look where you are.
Whoo! Charley! Hey!
All right, mate?
[Charley] Yeah, not bad. Just hanging around. I thought I'd just drop in.
- Yeah, nice to see you up here. - [both laugh]
[music continues]
[Ewan] Oh, my God.
Wow. It's like a religious experience, it is.
[laughing] I just love it so much.
Oh, wow!
[exhales deeply]
[instructor] Maybe we can fly to the landing field?
[Charley] Oh, my God.
[blows raspberry]
Wow.
- [instructor] Feet up. - Yep.
[grunts] Okay.
- [instructor] Okay? - Yeah.
It made me feel a bit ill when they were going in those real tight circles.
I felt a bit like… [blows raspberry]
A bit woozy, I felt there, but that was, um… that was amazing!
[music continues]
Here comes Ewan.
[Ewan] Whoo! Charley!
- It is incredible, isn't it? - [Ewan] Oh, man!
I mean, we saw each other up there a little bit,
but we ended up on different heights and stuff, so…
Yeah… [stammers] …but you looked good up there.
[music fades]
- So, Charley, if you could gather it… - [Charley] Yeah.
…gather it up a little and just…
so it's over the top a little. That's it.
[Charley] Do you want me to zip it up from this end?
[Ewan] Yeah.
All that camping has helped with the packing, Ewan.
- [Ewan laughing] - [chuckles]
Maybe that's why I like tents so much, cause they remind me of paragliders.
Isn't it amazing?
Look. You stick it in the back of your car.
That's your aircraft in there.
That's it.
- [Charley] How was that? - [Ewan] Oh, my God.
It was so beautiful. I had a little cry.
- I was, like… I got so moved. - [chuckles]
I loved it so much.
It was the highest takeoff I've ever done.
That was a heart-stopper.
[Charley] It was funny, when I was going tandem, he double-checked all the clips.
[laughing] I couldn't help myself. I had to check myself as well,
just to double-check that he double-checked.
[Ewan laughs]
We've been told about an artist
who works out of a castle in this part of Switzerland.
He goes by the name Not Vital
and was part of a group of New York artists in the '80s
which included Warhol and Basquiat.
[Charley] This is definitely off the beaten track.
Oh, wow. Look at it up there.
[Charley] Yeah. That's a big old house.
And is this his gallery, or he lives up here?
[Charley] I'm not sure. I think a bit of both.
- [Not Vital] Hello. - [Ewan] And do you live up here?
- Sometimes. - Sometimes?
Wouldn't you?
- I would, yes. - I would too.
- [Charley laughing] - I certainly would.
- [chuckles] Okay. - [Charley] Wow.
I love that on this end, there.
It's called Unpleasant Object.
- [Ewan chuckling] - [Charley] Unpleasant Object.
[Ewan] Are we allowed to go look?
- You wanna go up? - Yeah. We'd love to see it.
[Charley exclaims] Well, look at this.
1900, this person came here, his name was Lingner.
- He invented Odol mouthwash. - [Ewan] Oh.
And he became so rich with that
that he could do whatever he wanted.
So he came here, and he saw this ruin,
bought it, and built it for 16 years.
So, this castle was built on mouthwash, on the fresh breath of Germans.
That's brilliant.
Oh!
Yeah, those are testicles.
If you see the David of Michelangelo
- in Florence… - [Ewan] Yeah.
…let's say that David would be as big as the Palazzo,
- his balls would have this size. - Ah.
- [Ewan laughing] - [Charley] It's nice to see them.
What a place.
[Charley] It's incredible.
[Not Vital] So, like, I made this whole tree.
- Just casted bronze out of it. - [Ewan] Wow.
[Charley] Beautifully done. Wow, that's big.
How many pieces did you make it?
[Not Vital] I don't know. I mean, quite a few, I guess. No?
But it's technique,
- and technique is not so important. - Yeah.
Says Michelangelo, really.
[Charley chuckling]
- Technique is not… - Technique's not important.
[Not Vital] Okay, let's go. We'll take the elevator.
[Charley] Oh, there's an elevator.
Of course there is. That is just hilarious.
Wow.
[Not Vital] So, the owner, Lingner, he wanted to be an organist, no?
[Ewan] This was where he was gonna play?
[Not Vital] Yeah. This is the organ. It's the biggest private organ in Europe.
Geez.
Look at the pipes in here.
They thought, before, everything has to be straight.
[Ewan] Yeah.
[Not Vital] They can be like spaghetti, so the air goes through.
And so they could compact the whole organ.
[Ewan] And when was this organ built?
[Not Vital] 1916. The year that he died.
- [Ewan] Is it playable? - [Not Vital] Yeah.
- [Charley] Let me have a look. - Have a go.
[Charley] Have a go? I've never, ever played one of these before.
- Wow. - [Not Vital] This is Benjamin Britten's.
Wow.
[Not Vital] This was his instrument because he composed here.
I just played Benjamin Britten's piano.
[Charley] There you go.
- Beautiful. - [Charley] Shall we put this…
- [Not Vital] You can just leave that. - I'm worried.
[Ewan] Charley, you're right, we should put it down.
- Why? - I'm worried about that, yeah.
- We're worried about that part. - Let me just pop it down. 'Cause it…
But it's made in England.
- Yeah. - [Ewan] Exactly. That's why we should…
[Not Vital laughing]
Yeah.
[Ewan] Have you ever owned an English car?
[organ music playing]
He just appeared.
Look at this.
[Not Vital] If you like mountains, this is it.
[Ewan] Wow.
[Not Vital] And this is the national park.
[Charley] Oh, yeah.
- It's lovely traveling and exploring. - Yeah, traveling is fantastic.
Maybe they built these towers just for the view.
- [Not Vital] No. - [Charley laughing] I'm joking.
[Not Vital] The view was of no interest.
The idea of looking out is new.
In the old days, you were either out or you're inside.
This idea of looking at the landscape, that's… that's decadent.
- [Ewan] Oh, how funny. - [Charley laughs] Decadent.
[Ewan laughs]
It was a great pleasure to meet you, really. Absolutely fantastic.
[Charley] Such a pleasure. I've really enjoyed your company.
[engines start]
I took a photo of the rainbow.
It looks like it's coming out of the camel's pelvis.
[Ewan] Oh, yeah.
[Charley] Well, that was quite a mind-blowing experience.
[Ewan] He was a character. Made me laugh.
He had a very comic turn of phrase.
[Charley] It was quite funny when were by the organ.
You know, that organ player.
[Ewan] Where did he come from? I mean, it was like he was waiting in the wings.
- It was so weird. - [Charley] Yeah.
[Ewan] He looked like he was from a 1950s Italian art movie.
[Charley laughs]
[Ewan] Before we leave the Alps,
we'll stay the night at our cameraman Claudio's House.
What an amazing place to grow up! Bloody hell.
[Charley] Look at that. Oh, and Claudio's motorbike.
[Ewan] Look at that. This is Claudio's Long Way Round bike.
- [Charley] Yeah. - They were such great bikes.
I still love them to bits.
Hello.
[Claudio speaks German, laughs]
[in English] Ninety-two years old.
- I have been to the Olympic games. - Olympic games.
[bell tolling]
Nice to meet you. I'm Ewan. Nice to meet you.
- Olympic Games of stairs. - Of stairs.
- Gold medal. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[Charley] Twenty years of traveling with you, Claudio,
and we've never seen your house.
And you've always spoken about it. It's so nice to be here.
Gosh, love all the wood.
Yeah, that's typical here
- because in winter, it's bloody cold. - Yeah, cold.
- Yes. - Thank you.
[Charley] Okay. Tschüss. Good night. Thank you very much.
Goodbye. Bye-bye.
[bell tolling]
It's pretty early in the morning. And I didn't sleep very well.
The thing that kept me awake all night was this little puppy.
There's the culprit. Six o'clock, it was a cacophony of bells.
Apparently, you get used to it.
[sighs]
Bye, guys. Bye-bye.
After you, Charley.
["It Goes Oh" playing]
We're about to leave Switzerland,
but not before we've tried our hand at one more super local sport, hornussen,
otherwise known as farmers' golf.
Oh, I've got neutral there. That's not good.
I've noticed they don't go round the corner so well on neutral,
- these bikes. - [Charley laughs]
[Ewan] You know what it reminds me of, guys?
[Charley] Uh…
I know. Sally Gap in the Wicklow Mountains in Ireland.
- [both laugh] - [Ewan] No, I don't…
I don't know that one.
It's very Glencoe.
[music continues]
Okay, here we go.
We don't know exactly what it is.
We're gonna find out.
This is where J.K. Rowling got the Harry Potter Quidditch thing…
- [Ewan] Oh, is it? - [Charley] I don't know. I'm guessing.
- [Ewan] Did you just make that up? - I just made it up.
[Ewan] Okay.
Straight out of the Book of Boorman, yeah. [laughs]
Look at the thing. Look at that weird chutey thing.
[Charley] That's the bit where they…
Whoosh!
Oh, wow.
- [Charley] Those are the sticks? - Yes.
- I wasn't expecting, like, a fishing rod. - [Ewan] A big wobbly thing.
So, we have here… This is the part where we hit a hornuss.
- This something like a hockey puck. - [Ewan] Okay.
- A little smaller but harder. - [Ewan] Right.
[Adrian] It goes very fast. 300 kilometers per hour.
And they try to hit this hornuss as far as possible.
- [Charley] That's the puck. - Yeah, a bit of clay.
Where does it sit?
Oh, right at the end.
Wow. Okay.
- What happens when you go into the trees? - It's death line for you.
[Ewan] Death line.
[Charley] Yeah, death line.
- The death line. - [Charley] Death line.
- Here we go. - [Charley] Okay, here it goes.
[whispering] He reminds me of my neighbor Jimmy Wiley.
He's very like him.
[normal voice] See, I would definitely knock it off there by accident.
[Charley] Classic, yeah.
[Ewan] Going round.
[shouts]
- What? - Over the cloud.
Now he goes in the cloud.
Now you can't see it anymore. [laughs]
Yeah.
- I get a feeling… - Just follow through.
- …that we should give it a go. - You want to try?
[Charley] Oh, yeah, I'd love to try. Yeah.
So, you come round like this.
Join Charley and Ewan on Rare Sports Around the World.
Long Way Rare Sport.
[player] When you go back, you do slowly.
Hit through the ball.
[both] Whoa!
It's a natural talent.
I think Charley's found his calling.
I give you, after, the paper for coming to us. [laughing]
Well, you know, I don't come cheap.
- That's very kind. - Well done.
Very good.
- Well done. - Thank you.
Ewan.
That's no joke once you get up here, eh?
How do I look? Do I look like I'm halfway on the pipe there?
[Charley] I think you need to be in the middle of the wood.
- [Ewan] Am I not in the middle? - [Charley] No. That's the middle there.
- Okay. - Okay.
[speaks German]
- [in English] Yes, you have to… - He is the trainer now.
Not with force.
- Not with force? - [Marcel] Not with force.
[Ewan] I shouldn't use the Force? Is that what you're saying?
Don't use the Force.
- [Marcel] Good! - Perfect.
Right down the middle, Ewan.
- Well done. - I did use the Force.
- Well done.
Eh, two natural talents, huh? We have two players more.
[Charley] Yeah, two players more today. Yeah.
Thanks, guys, that was brilliant. I really enjoyed it. That was great, yeah.
We should just stay here and carry on this.
- [Charley] I liked the idea of the game. - No, I'm interested to see it.
Look how far away they're going. They're miles away.
[Adrian] In the defense,
you have to make sure that no hornuss falls to the ground
- before you stop it. - [Charley] Okay.
[Ewan] Look at the dents on here. That's solid wood.
No wonder they wear helmets.
Yes!
Oh, that's a monster.
[Charley] Oh, yes, he's done it. He went that way. The board went that way.
It's nice to meet you, man.
- Take care. Thank you so much. - Thank you. Bye- bye.
[engine starts]
["Maybe Tomorrow" playing]
[Ewan] That was a weird sport we just witnessed.
How did they come up with that whippy funny stick?
[Charley] God knows. [laughs]
What I love is the enthusiasm for it.
[Ewan] We're on the home straight now, making a beeline north to Calais
before we cross the channel in the morning.
Welcome to France.
- [Ewan] That's it, Charley. - [Charley] Oh, bloody hell. Wow.
[music continues]
This is our last country before we get home.
[Ewan] Yeah. We really are on the last leg, now.
[Charley] Yeah.
[Ewan] This is France that we know and love.
- Wow. That's nice. - [Charley] Wow, look at that.
[Ewan] This looks familiar, Charley.
I was here about 25 years ago.
It's got an incredible Gothic cathedral.
[Charley] Well, should we stop off and stretch our legs?
Okay, let's do this.
[Charley] Do you think that's it? I don't know.
- Awesome, isn't it? - Amazing, huh?
[Ewan] I did that six-day trip round France.
And I remember having pictures of my bike with this in the background.
And I wanted to be left alone,
so I did a full-on, like, shaved proper Mohican.
And nobody spoke to me for five days.
It was terrible. I felt so lonely.
Quite awe-inspiring when you see it from here, isn't it?
The size of it.
Let's have a little peek inside.
- [Charley] Look at the glass color. - Yeah. And the end.
What an amazing feat to build something like this.
But the intricate detail of everything is insane.
Look at all these little carvings everywhere.
- The masons were allowed to carve… - Their own faces.
…their own faces as a kind of… as a signature.
This is where they used to crown the French kings.
[Ewan] That's insane.
There's one for Telsche…
my lovely sister.
[engine starts]
Okay, here we go.
Onwards and upwards.
"Calais." Our first signpost for Calais.
[Ewan] Oh, yeah, look at that.
We've seen so much of France that you just wouldn't see
if you sat on the motorway.
I've really rather liked it.
My bum, on the other hand, has had enough.
[laughs]
[Ewan] I'd love to just wash my bike.
- Get all that oil off the side of it. - Yeah.
I'm sure there'll be a hose.
[Charley] Oh, I'm sure. I'm sure.
Oh.
[Ewan] Oh, hello.
Oh, it's lovely. Seriously.
Well…
Holy moly.
This is nice.
[Ewan] What a great place to stay on our last night.
Spot the change.
It was still white underneath.
I felt for sure it was just all rust.
But actually, it was totally just surface rust.
And nobody, including myself, had ever given it a wash.
I mean, look, it's white.
Gotta get her looking like [whispers] she's the star of the show.
[whispers] She is the star.
[Charley] So, for our last meal together,
I'm making leek pasta, and then we're doing this beef.
So we'll pan-sear it, and then put it in the oven.
[Ewan] It is amazing, isn't it?
I mean, it's not the longest mileage in the world,
but a 50-year old bike in the cold and the heat and the rain,
it's pretty impressive, I think.
I'm so grateful to her, you know.
God, it's a good bike, isn't it?
Goddamn it, it's a good bike, isn't it?
I just keep… I keep…
When no one's around, I just keep going over there,
and I look at her profile.
'Cause she's so beautiful.
She's so beautiful, this bike.
[Charley] The last two and a half months has been incredible.
We've done a huge amount.
And I've loved every minute of it.
It's just been brilliant hanging out with Ewan
and having that person on your back all the time
and looking out for each other.
I really, really like it.
That's perfect.
[Ewan sighs] Beautiful.
These, uh, I roasted them earlier.
- You just squish them out? - Just squish them out.
If you squash them and then cook raw garlic…
[stammering] …it sometimes gives a different kind of flavor.
This gives it a more earthy flavor.
- [Ewan] I'm always gonna do that now… - Try a piece.
…and I'm always going to cook my new potatoes
- in dill. - Yes. In dill.
- Two things I've learned on this trip. - And you have to let them rest,
- the potatoes, yeah. - Yeah.
So, there.
Who wants a kiss?
[camera person laughing]
[rooster crows]
[Ewan] It's just after 6:30. We leave at 8:00.
Go up to Calais.
Get back to Charley's house and meet everybody.
Mary will be waiting for me.
I can't wait to see her.
Can't wait to be in her arms.
And then tomorrow,
right back home to Scotland, where we all started from.
But this is it. This is the last day.
I can't get my zip to go up. Isn't that funny, the last day?
Oh. Oh, oh!
[engine rumbling]
[wind chimes tinkling]
- I wondered what that was. - [laughs]
How do I look with my white mudguards?
Wow. I didn't realize it was white.
I didn't know they were white. I just thought they were rust.
- Yeah. - So funny.
[chuckles] I still can't quite believe it's the last day.
["Humankind" playing]
There she is, there's the sea.
Oh, my gosh. That's the White Cliffs of Dover, is it?
- [Charley] Yeah. - Is it?
- [Charley] Yes. - It's so close!
[music continues]
[Charley] I'm finding it really difficult
to remember everything that we've done on this trip.
I mean, it's-it's quite extraordinary.
We really packed it in.
We've been carried around this huge journey on 50-year-old bikes.
It's quite a long way.
- [siren wails] - [chuckles]
I've never been in most of the countries we went through before.
[Charley] I don't think I've ever been to Denmark.
[Ewan] I don't think I've ever been to Denmark.
You see the landscape change around you.
Here we go.
[both laughing]
[music continues]
[Ewan] That's a nice wall of snow.
You experience the elements.
[shivering]
- [Ewan] Ah! - [groans]
I'm being attacked by mosquitoes in forests and pissing rain.
They want my blood.
Oh, dear.
[Ewan] My favorite night was camping on the island.
And they left us there.
[Charley] We just sort of fell into a lot of stories.
And you end up meeting extraordinary people.
[groans]
[Ewan] And there's something about that that feeds your soul.
[chuckles]
Ka-tung.
That's the technical term.
You have to be open to the journey.
You have to be open to your bike breaking down…
[groans]
…and being stuck at the side of the road.
Are you able to be my knight in shining armor?
[Ewan] That was the spirit of the trip. That was the whole point.
Go on old bikes that would slow us down a bit
so we would see more stuff, have more of a laugh.
And that's exactly what happened.
Oh!
Whoo!
[Ewan] Amazing!
Oh, man. The idea of riding the bike to your house, so exciting.
[Charley] It is cool.
All the trips we've done, we've always finished somewhere else.
- [Ewan] Yeah. - And then now we're,
you know, back into the Channel Tunnel, back to Britain.
Long way home.
Here we go.
- [Charley] Fantastic. - Whoa. Almost fell over there.
- That would've been embarrassing. - [chuckles]
Yeah. "I saw that Charley and Ewan the other day.
Ewan fell flat on his face, flat on his arse."
Yeah, standing still in a train.
[announcer] Welcome to England. We hope you had a pleasant trip.
And thank you for choosing--
Right. Now, on British soil. There we go.
Oh, now we have to drive on the left.
[Charley] Oh, my God. The left. The left.
[Ewan] We're on the home straight to Charley's house in Surrey.
It won't be the end of the journey for me though,
as tomorrow I'll leave Charley behind
and set off for Scotland on my own.
["Show You My World" playing]
[Charley] Wow. In a few hours we'll be, um…
- [Ewan] At your house! - We'll be at my house.
[Charley] But first, though, we're gonna meet up with some bikers.
It's become a bit of a tradition.
We're trying to coordinate all of the convoy people who have started to arrive.
It's four minutes past 1:00.
Dad's normally a bit of a stickler for time.
Here he is!
Well done! You did it!
We could hear you coming round the corner.
- Yeah? - Yeah, the… [imitates motorcycle]
- …of the bike. - Oh.
[music continues]
[Charley] Wow. It's lovely to see all those bikes in my mirror.
[David] These guys are motorcyclists.
Ewan was telling a story about when he was making a film,
and he was prohibited to ride a motorcycle.
He said, "Asking me not to be able to ride a motorcycle
is like asking me not to listen to music."
That's who these guys are.
[Ewan sighs] Man, remember the ride into New York?
I remember a very strong feeling of losing you
- in all the people. - Yeah.
[Ewan] Being on road with Charley
is something that I share with him and no one else, you know.
He's in my mirror, or I'm in his.
It's so familiar.
We've done so many thousands of miles like that, you know.
[Charley] I think as you get older
you're much more precious with the people that you spend time with.
And Ewan is one of those people.
[Ewan] There is something about being like a boy again
on our bikes as kids and meet up with mates in the street
and just knock about.
It's like doing that as a grown-up.
Whoo!
[Charley] I wasn't really going anywhere until we did Long Way Round,
and I remember thinking that I'd let my family down.
So I feel very grateful that I met Ewan.
- [Ewan] It's been amazing. - [Charley] It has.
Thank you, Ewan. It's been great fun.
[Ewan] Thank you, man.
Well, it was a hell of a long way round to get to your house, Charley,
that's for sure.
[Charley chuckling] Oh.
I suggest next time, just the A1 or the M1 or something.
[stammers] M6.
[Charley chuckles]
This is my driveway, just here.
[Ewan] No way.
[music continues]
- [cheering] - [Charley] Hello, everybody!
[laughing] Oh! Hey!
[crowd cheering]
[Charley] Oh, wow. Look at my beautiful wife.
Oh, holy, holy, holy…
[Ewan] Where's Mary?
- [Mary chuckling] - Oh, look at that.
That was a very long way.
I love you.
[speaks indistinctly]
Good to see you.
Hi, sweetie. Hi. [chuckles]
- We did it. - Oh, my God!
[Charley] Hey, Dad. Oh, it's so lovely to see you.
I've been waiting for you all morning. All day.
Oh, you're looking beautiful, Dad.
- [chuckles] - You look so well.
Daddy!
- The tattoo? - [Charley] Oh, the tattoo. Look.
- It's smaller than I thought it would be! - Wow!
Yeah, it looked bigger.
- Oh, I'm first and you're second. - What? Why's she first…
[Ewan] And, uh, yeah. I've never seen Charley's place.
[relaxing music playing]
[Ewan] I'm gonna get on my bike and ride to Scotland, but via Manchester,
where I've got a plan, so I don't have to ride the whole way.
[chuckles]
To bonny Scotland again!
["Whole Thing" playing]
My friend Chris has been putting together a Volkswagen Beetle.
So, I'm gonna put this bike up on a trailer
and by nighttime we'll be home! [exclaims]
Whoo-hoo!
[Charley] I'll give Ewan a call and see how he's doing.
- [line ringing] - He won't answer.
It's, you know… It's all over.
[Ewan] Charley?
Hey, man! How's it going?
[laughs] Mate, I miss you too.
Guess what it's doing right now.
Raining. [laughs]
Manchester.
[chuckles] That looks great!
I haven't driven a car for ten weeks.
- Ten weeks? - I hope I can remember. Yeah. [chuckles]
[music continues]
Scotland! Scotland!
Whoo!
[electronic voice] Fingerprint not recognized.
Well, I'm not allowed to go home because it won't let me in.
[electronic voice] Fingerprint recognized.
[music ends]
[laughs]
Here. Press it. Here. This one. This one here. See, press that.