[howling]
Awoo!
-Awoo! -Awoo!
Willie: Welcome to the greatest adventure
on Planet Earth.
Hey, gator incoming.
Whoa!
Jase: Don't stick your hand out.
Willie: That's our competition.
-I'm scared. -Willie: If there's one thing
that makes a Robertson a Robertson,
it's our unique ability
to dominate every creature on this planet.
[all cheering]
Willie: Whether it's slimy...
Oh, yeah, frogging time.
Squeaky...
Look in that drawer.
-Aah! -Aah!
I'm addicted to honeycomb and honey.
Or even stinky.
Jep: Be kind to the bees.
Don't be an idiot.
Christian: Neutralize them, Jacob.
Oh, my God. Oh, it's in my shirt.
They're all over me.
Y'all ready to learn how to process a frog?
No!
Their feet are gone.
We got a lock on it, son.
[screaming]
Willie: Don't let that frog get away.
Or at least most of us do.
♪ I just wanna go fast
♪ Life goes by in a flash
♪ Living free, no looking back ♪
♪ I just wanna go fast
♪ Keep growing from the past
♪ Can't slow me down, I wanna go fast ♪
♪ Or lean back
♪ Clean right out
♪ Go fast, make the good times last ♪
♪ Yeah, I just wanna go
[duck call]
Willie: It's frog season, boys.
Well, we got to teach these kids.
You know, my grandkids
have never experienced the swamps yet.
That's pathetic.
Yeah, I gotta get them out there
so they can see some of the real outdoors.
Smug Boy and Juju Boy.
They're fixing to get them a little lesson in frog.
Well, who's gonna catch them?
[all laugh]
What do you mean, who's gonna catch 'em? Me.
Willie has been dying
to take the grandkids frog hunting
ever since the season started.
Hey, it's a rite of passage.
It requires nerves of steel.
-Willie: Get it? -Jase: Yeah, I got it.
-Willie: Oh, yeah. -Jase: I have caught
thousands of frogs in my life.
I'm a frog's nightmare.
-Jase: Get him, Willie. -Willie: Calm down.
And it ain't as easy as it looks.
Oh, snake, Willie.
Aah!
Well, they probably need to start
by watching before they just jump in there.
Who are they watching?
-No chance. -No, you don't wanna
-terrorize them. -Well, yeah,
they don't know how to catch frogs.
-Yeah, they gotta learn first. -Hey, look.
They gotta learn, okay, just like swimming, okay?
If you don't teach kids to swim,
hey, pick 'em up and throw them in the pond.
And then, hey, say "swim."
Nope.
When you're up on that front of the boat
and your adrenaline's pumping,
every once in a while you got to jump!
You just got to go for it,
-so I don't know-- -Turn into a frog.
-Yeah, that's-- -To catch a frog.
That's been Willie's problem for 50 years.
What are you talking about?
Well, I'm just saying. The law of gravity.
I'm athletic. I'm athletic.
Hey, he's just saying you're a little slow, chubby.
-Time, space, and matter. -Martin: Sneaky athletic.
Yeah. You would think, as many frogs as you've eaten,
it would help your vertical leap, but--
That's why you need me.
Do you want to see frogs or do you want to catch frogs?
I mean, if you want to go, you're more than welcome to go.
You need me to go.
I'm not saying I need you to do anything.
You hear him ask me?
That was his way of asking me to go frog hunting.
He wasn't gonna say, "will you go with me?"
He just knew, that was him saying,
"I need you, brother."
[laughs]
Willie: Here we go.
man: All right, it's time to get our meeting started
of the Northeast Louisiana Beekeepers Club.
So I'd like to kind of go around the room
and everybody introduce yourself,
tell us how many hives you have, and why you're here.
Sadie: Uncle Si has asked us to join him
for the local beekeepers meeting,
which I actually didn't even know
was a thing, um,
and I'm not totally sure why we're here.
We'll start right here with Sean.
I'm Si Robertson.
Uncle Si and wild honey have a complicated history.
Hey, I'm like Winnie the Pooh, boy.
Si: We gonna get the honey.
Yeah, yeah... that's the honey.
Yeah, yep.
Jase: You can't buy that in the store.
That's the best honey you'll ever eat.
The problem is, he ain't gonna be
a lot of help in actually getting it.
-Jase: Look out! -Willie: Aah!
I'm hit! Aah!
Every good soldier has his post.
Mine is commanding from behind.
I thought you were Winnie the Pooh.
Hey, that's General Winnie the Pooh.
I got the getaway vehicle ready.
Si: I brought these kids for one reason,
and that is make me a bunch of honeycomb and honey.
So let's kind of go over
some of the tools that you'll need.
Bee suits.
This is gonna be your line of defense.
A lot of times, I'll use something like this,
which is a bee veil.
It's kind of cool.
Sadie: How often do you get stung?
In a day's time, up to 20 times.
Oh, no.
Si: Hey, I got a serious question for you.
What is honey?
What is the ingredients, so to speak?
Well, basically, in a nutshell, you're dealing
with bee spit.
So we're eating bee spit?
Yeah.
That's amazing.
Okay, this is the hive that I got started with.
It's called a flow hive.
It's got observation windows in it.
Matter of fact, I encourage all of y'all
to come up here and look.
You can literally watch the bees working up and down in here.
Si: Where do I get hands-on experience for this?
-Robertson? -Yeah.
He comes here all the time.
That sucker, they've been holding out on me.
So, do you still need us to do this if you can just
-get it from Jep and Jessica? -Si: Oh, sure. Hey,
you got to have the thinker,
and then you got to have the doers.
I'm the thinker, y'all are the doers.
-I get to get all this, right? -Woman: That's right.
That's what I'm talking about. I'll leave two for y'all.
Rebecca, you said we were setting up for a fashion show.
Well, it's a little "Mission: Impossible,"
but I believe in us.
Korie: Rebecca is truly so creative.
When Zane was a baby, she started this
parent and child clothing line called Me and My.
Now she has a new line ready to debut.
We don't have to clean up, like, the whole space.
I just need, like, basically
enough space to put a runway in.
Ooh, I think I'm a little too pregnant
-for all this. -Whoo.
Korie: This is classic Rebecca.
I mean, she has a fashion show
less than a week away
in a building that she and John Reed are renovating,
and it is far from ready.
I mean, like, this needs more than a little bit of help.
Oh, this is kind of cool.
A vase with naked women on it.
That's funny.
Rebecca, whose pants are these?
Rebecca: Oh, no. Oh, it smells, too.
Um, probably, like,
raccoon or a dead body.
Well, I think I found a wasp nest in here.
-Whoa. -Oh, no.
I think that might be dirt daubers.
I can tell you one thing, it's not a beehive,
because I am learning all about the hive.
-Mary Kate: "The hive." -I know more about the hive
than you want to know.
Bella: Some of this stuff is, like, actually cute
and salvageable, Rebecca. This dresser honestly
could be, like, restored really easily I think.
-Just a broken-- -[all scream]
Rebecca: Bella, what the heck?
-What is it? -Look in that drawer.
-That one? -This one.
-Oh. -[all scream]
Rebecca: Oh, my gosh.
-Wait, no, it's open. -Rebecca: Oh, my gosh!
-Rebecca: Oh... -Sadie: Oh, gosh, yeah.
It looked pretty cute.
Sadie: Cute? We have got different definitions of cute.
-Rebecca: Oh. -Bella: He's about to get out.
He's about to get out.
I'm done. That... I'm done.
Rebecca: Pull the drawer out completely.
Bella: Oh, too far, too far, too far.
Rebecca: Okay, okay.
Korie: Okay, come on, little mousie.
-woman: Jump in. -Korie: Come on, little mousie.
Oh, there he goes...
[all screaming]
Whoa, Mom!
-Oh, my gosh. -Korie: We're good.
Okay, I think our work here is done.
Korie: Oh, okay.
We need to call an exterminator.
Sadie: I don't know if we're gonna be able
to get this done. This is gonna require
some serious work. I'm all about
delusional confidence, but this is just delusional.
This is crazy.
Ooh, they already pooped in there.
-Oh! -Korie: Ew.
This is the greatest fun
that you can have on this planet.
Catching frogs with your hands.
-Well... -We're gonna do the impossible.
We're gonna try to turn y'all
into rednecks tonight.
I thought I was already rednecked.
No, you're in training.
Hey, can I get a whoop?
Whoop!
Remember the goal.
Look, not only is this the most fun,
this is the greatest thing you can eat on the planet.
-It's like chicken. -The top.
Jase: A fresh frog leg.
Let's do this.
John Reed: Oh, yeah, boys.
Willie: Oh, yeah, frogging time.
Jase: So look, the catcher-- Zane, the catcher,
I'm gonna lean out the front of the boat.
I'm gonna shine this light in his eyes.
And then, look, I'm gonna raise that right hand,
and in the blink of an eye, I'm gonna go pshew!
-It's the claw. -And I'm gonna hold firm.
-Willie: It's the claw method. -Jase: I will pass it
to the ice chest man,
who only has one job.
Secure the frog, put it on ice.
Willie: Jase likes to think he's the frog whisperer,
like God's gift of the swamp.
Jase: Frog hunting is a three-man job.
You got a man catching 'em.
That's my area of expertise.
-[croaks] -You got a motor man
and an ice chest man.
Calm down. The catcher and the motor man,
they have to have some skills.
The ice chest man can be any human being.
So that was Willie's job. [laughs]
-Willie: You ready? -Jase: Yeah.
-Willie: You ready to do this? -Jase: Yeah, we're ready.
-All right, here we go. -Jase: Here's the first one.
Wilile: Right past that bush up there.
Jase: Hey, right there, right there, right there.
-Willie: There-- all right. -man: Keep a light on it.
Jase: Right here, right here.
Keep that light on that frog now.
Jase: Right here, straight ahead.
Keep coming, keep coming.
Coming in hot.
Aah!
Get him?
Jase: Did I get him?
Did I get him?
[cheering]
John Reed: That's a speckled belly right there,
I mean,
-this is a whopper. -Look at this joker.
Willie: That's a keeper there, boys.
-Look at that thing. -Lookie here.
-Jase: Touch it, come on. -No!
Jase: Okay, let's throw it in the ice chest.
Here you go, ice chest man.
Hey-hey-hey! Don't let the frog get out!
Don't let the frog get out!
Willie: He gone.
I was testing Willie's ice chest skills.
He did not perform.
-You got one job-- -You got to do better
on the pass off.
Willie, have you actually ever caught a frog?
What are you talking about, son?
The only way I can shut him up
is to go ahead and get my hands dirty.
Willie: Or a little gooey.
As long as I don't embarrass myself
in front of my grandkids.
Do not miss him under any circumstance.
John Reed: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Get it?
That sucker put a move on me.
Jase: Do not miss him under any circumstance.
Willie: Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Jase: What happened?
Did you not catch that frog?
That sucker put a move on me.
Put a move on you? What are you talking about?
-Until I grabbed it. -[Jase groaning]
-[all groaning] -[Willie laughing]
-See, boys, look. -Willie: See, boys?
Sometimes it takes 50 years.
-Willie: Hey, there ya go. -And then all of a sudden.
Willie: It's hard to talk trash when I got a handful of frog.
You know, frog hunting ain't about who's better, me or Jase.
It's me, obviously.
It's really about showing our grandkids
what it really means to be a Robertson.
All right, John Luke.
You're up.
-boy: I see one. -Jase: There he is.
-John Reed: That's a good one. -Willie: Stretch,
make your move.
[cheering]
-Now we're frog hunting. -Willie: Good catch.
Yeah!
-Willie: Yeah! -John Reed: Oh, he got it.
[cheering]
Willie: Everybody getting in on this.
-Jase: Got him! -John Reed: Got him?
[cheering]
-[cheering] -men: Got him!
Zane, dude, give him a high five!
Fwah-pop!
Jase: This is the frog's Promised Land, boys!
-Jase: Got him. -Willie: Yeah!
Jase: Hand off!
-That's yours. -Jase: That's yours, Shep.
-John Reed: Wanna grab him? -Hey, right there.
Look at the chest on this thing.
You better make your move.
-Willie: Oh, no. -Jase: Whoa.
Jase: He got the frog.
-[cheering] -Willie: He got the frog!
Yes! Yes!
John Reed: I never seen a man do a backflip.
I got him.
Jase: Full moon tonight.
Willie: Frogs move on a full moon.
You up for a little howl for the moon
on your first frog hunt?
Awoo.
-Awoo. -Awoo.
[all howling]
Is it the weirdest day of your life?
Yeah.
He's in shock.
Jase: I think you boys have been
-redneck-ified tonight. -[croaks]
Jep: All right, there's some things to keep in mind.
Be kind to the bees. Be assertive.
And the most important one is don't be an idiot.
Sadie: Uncle Si wants us to become beekeepers
so that he can have honey, but then he found out
that Jep and Jessica actually are beekeepers.
So today we are here at Jep and Jessica's
to learn the art.
I'm excited y'all are getting into this.
And hopefully take some honey home with us.
Hey, Christian, you might want to put your suit on first.
Christian: I'm a little "bee-wildered"
-on how to unzip this. -Oh, God.
-Jep: That's a good one. -Here we go.
-Jep: Good one. -Willie: No, I'm not surprised
Jep and Jessica are keeping bees.
He's always been into whatever's trendy.
-Jase: Oh, boy. -Hey, fellas.
Jep...
-You like my new hat? -Jase: No.
Dad, this isn't a toy.
It's a state-of-the-art quadcopter, 1080p video.
These aren't farm animals. They're domesticated chickens.
-That's just stupid. -And he's always
been somewhat of an animal lover.
Korie: Are you gonna smile?
No, I'm not smiling.
I'm freaking holding a falcon.
-You look constipated. -Me and Morpheus have bonded.
I'm just glad they're keeping that hive stock
on the other side of the family property.
There's the queen bee, drones, and worker bees.
And there's a king that's less talked about, but...
There's no king.
He disguises himself as a drone-- yes.
Yes, I'm telling you, it's true.
Jep: Jess does a lot of the day-to-day operation
on the beehive, but I kind of have the know-how.
It's called science, trust me.
-Jep: Uh-oh, here he comes. -Jessica: There he is!
Jep: You look like an astronaut.
We've landed on the moon, boys.
-Uh-uh. -You and Jessica
have been holding out on me.
-Yeah? -You're the keeper of the bees
and, hey, the bees are the ones that make the honey
and the honeycomb.
Jep: We 100% held out on Si.
We don't want him to know anything we're doing here
because he would rob it.
Once we start smoking these bees out,
they will... get angry,
and they're gonna be disoriented, but--
And they can smell fear, I promise you that.
So, if you're scared at all, you're gonna get stung.
Jessica, show us how it's done.
Jessica: Okay.
Christian: This is exactly what Jason Statham did
in The Beekeeper.
I'm so excited to learn today
and see how much knowledge
I actually have about beekeeping.
I think it's a lot. I've done a lot of research.
Have you seen the movie The Beekeeper, Jep?
Oh, absolutely.
It's freaking awesome.
Freaking awesome movie.
Jep: If you want to do anything with bees,
you have to watch that movie.
You have counterintelligence, hand-to-hand combat, explosives.
-Oh, here they come, here we go. -Jacob: Oh, look at that.
-Jacob: Oh, shoot. -Si: Right there...
Christian: Neutralize 'em, Jacob.
That Jason Statham,
he really knows beekeeping.
Jessica: All right, so we're gonna take
this frame right here, and we'll harvest this honey
that's in here on the honeycomb, okay?
all: Whoa.
Si: There you go.
Jacob: Let me do it. Let me do it.
Jep: Now you're making 'em mad.
They're angry.
Si: They're angry now, boy.
I am literally Jason Statham.
-Yeah. -Oh, Christian.
Jep: Good work, guys.
Bella: Okay, Christian, stop.
Sadie: All right, okay, have you had your fun?
Now they're swarming all over.
Christian: Look, they're on me.
I want to do this.
-I think I could really do it. -Sadie: Yeah, you could.
I can't wait. I'm gonna fill a bathtub up
with honey and honeycomb.
Sadie: Christian.
I'm coming. I'm literally coming.
Jacob: Stop opening them up.
[deep voice, English accent] I am the beekeeper.
[buzzing]
Si: All right, I'm gonna cut this off real quick.
What do you do with the honeycomb?
-Can we take care of that? -There's some honey.
You can lick it. Let me get you--
Now is actually the hardest part,
which is harvesting the honey because it's a sticky mess.
Now you can keep the beeswax
and make candles and other things with it.
-Um, I use-- -Soaps. You can make soaps.
You can do a lot of things. Lip balms.
Butt paste.
Okay, you can...
if you wanna try some butt paste, you can.
Yeah, good chafe relief.
-Whoa. -Look at this.
-[overlapping chatter] -Jacob: Whoa-ho-ho.
-Christian: Let's go. -And then I just kind of
break up the comb, and it'll just start
pouring out the bottom.
Like, you'll see it straight through... yum.
That's some honey udders.
There's a lot of work to this, isn't there, Jessica?
-It's a lot of work. -Si: Hey, this is exciting.
Just think how much honey we can make.
Are you gonna do the work?
-No, I'm gonna supervise. -So, we're gonna be
-the worker bees? -Yeah.
I don't really think Si cares who does the bees
as long as he gets honey,
and I'm really okay with that, too.
I just want some honey.
Bella: He wants a lot of honey.
-Sadie: Yeah-- -Bella: He's very demanding
-about his honey. ---high demand.
There's, like, no way he's gonna
-eat all that honey. -Si: Look at that.
-Christian: I'm hungry. -Jessica: Okay.
-Can I have a spoonful? -Yes.
Christian: Pass it down. Pass it down again.
Ooh.
Hey, don't double dip with your spoon.
-Yeah, Si, you can't-- -What do you mean, double dip?
-Yeah. -Jessica: No.
-Oh. -Korie: What?
Jep: Si, we don't want your germs in here.
Oh, hey, I ain't got no germs.
Keep your spoons to yourself, okay?
-Thank you. -If you're gonna be a bear,
you might as well be a grizzly.
[laughs]
You know, I don't know what awaits me in heaven...
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm.
...but if it's a bathtub full of honey and corn,
bingo, baby!
I just hit the lottery!
All right, well, look, I have a couple extra hive boxes
if y'all want to set 'em up and try it out.
Maybe we should do it.
-I think we should do it. -I think they'll do good.
I give 'em about two days... and they'll be done.
Okay, boys, it's time for-- it's time for a toast.
[all laugh]
Si: Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm.
Willie: All right, we've done the hard part,
which is catching. Now you ready to clean 'em?
Yeah.
Oh! Oh!
[all laugh]
Willie: We got a jumper, boys. We got a jumper.
I don't want to teach these kids just how to catch frogs.
That's just step number one.
[squishing]
-What was that? -[laughs]
That's the sound of a bullfrog losing his head, Cole Man.
There's some fine stuff that grows out here in this swamp.
Yuppie girls wouldn't like it.
Don't marry some yuppie girl.
-You know what I'm saying? -Mm-hmm.
It's what we call a classic Robertson teaching moment.
-Yeah. -Yeah.
We're gonna eat their legs.
All right, first thing...
Their feet are gone.
John Luke: Everyone got really quiet.
You ready for the next thing? We'll take their skin off.
-Okay. -Holland: Give me the skin.
Willie: Boo.
-"Yesh." -"Yesh."
Willie: Cut that off right there.
Yeah.
What's the difference of human blood and frog blood?
One is human and one is frog.
Lookie there.
There we have
the clean frog legs.
He's dead.
And now we have his legs.
You wanna paint the toenails?
Sure, there you go.
All right, you ready to clean some more? Go grab some more.
-Let's keep cleaning 'em. -John Luke: Let's get some.
The first one is always the hardest.
But once you've gotten through the slimy bloodiness of it all,
it's smooth sailing after that.
You're gonna grab one, okay?
-Wait, wait, wait. -Aah!
Aah!
It's all right. It's all right.
Free the frogs.
John Reed: Let's go get 'em. Let's go get 'em.
Hey, don't let that frog get away.
It went right in there.
Because I saw it run in there.
Aah! Aah!
John Reed: It just wanted to kiss you.
Hey, get that frog off my golf green.
-I'll catch him tonight. -[croaks]
Sadie: Oh, my gosh. Okay, stay calm.
Stay calm, cool, and collected.
Christian: I promise you, I'm not nervous.
Okay, good. That makes one of us.
Jep and Jessica set us up with everything that we need,
and we're beekeepers.
Pshew!
Sadie: Whoa.
Whoa, be careful.
-Christian: Whoa. -Sadie: Whoa. Whoa.
That was crazy. Oh, my gosh.
I think I found my calling.
Sadie: You're doing so good.
I don't even think Jacob's seen the movie The Beekeeper,
so I don't know how he thinks he'd be good at this.
Um... he's a drone.
We're both queens.
We technically wouldn't be queens.
There's only room for one queen.
This is why Jason Statham was doing it.
It's, like, so addicting.
Bella: Oh, my gosh.
-Jacob: Look at that. -Bella: Aah!
Oh, my gosh, Jacob. They're everywhere.
They're just bees. You're fine.
Bella: I feel like they're, like, all in my suit.
I mean, this is, like, swarming. Aah!
Oh, my gosh, babe.
Okay. Okay, get the top.
Get the lid. Get the lid. Get the lid.
-Christian, Christian... -It keeps slipping.
-Christian, stop swatting. -It keeps...
Christian, stop swatting.
Christian, stop. Christian, you're freaking me out.
Oh, my gosh, your shoe. Your shoe.
-Babe, babe, babe, okay. Wait. -They're all over me!
Wait, don't leave me! Don't leave me!
-I can't run. -What are you doing?
-I can't run. -Why?
I'm pregnant.
-Oh, crap. I forgot. -What is your problem?
I forgot you're pregnant. Uh!
Bella: I don't know if we can be beekeepers.
-This ought to be fun. -Yeah.
Hey, there's the exterminators.
Rebecca told me we had some problems with the building,
some critters.
And I know a few guys with a lot of experience.
You need it gone, we got you.
We're about to have a fashion show.
I don't want anything scary or dangerous up there.
Everything needs to be clean and safe.
-Oh, yeah. -Yeah.
I would definitely consider myself an exterminator.
I've eradicated many rodents.
Pretty proficient at it.
...and y'all go upstairs and see what's up there.
But all I seen was a big mouth, about like this,
and it's full of sharp teeth.
So, all three of you, be real careful going up there.
-You're not going? -No, I'm not going up there.
Rebecca: Apparently, I say exterminator,
but he brought me the "Duck-corum" guys.
I mean, I guess they know how to do it,
but this is not what I had in mind.
I need professionals.
John Reed: I don't see anything.
Hmm. All right.
The first thing we do is secure the perimeter.
-There ya go. -All right, all right.
All right, I'm headed north, boys.
Hey, do you and John have beehives?
No, we don't. I'm allergic to bees--
-Oh, you're allergic to bees? -Remember? Yeah.
What is it--
We got a homemade trap, boys.
They get in there and they ain't getting out.
Uh-huh.
One for the critter and...
one for the hunter.
Exterminating makes me hungry.
Yeah, I can get him five beehives and then, look,
all you got to do is he goes out there and robs it.
And then we collect the honey, I get a bunch of honey,
-and I'll give y'all some. -Okay, well, how about
I just buy the honey from you?
-[crash] -Hey!
-What is it? -Martin: I don't know.
Nobody home.
Why is there a toilet up here?
Jay: Hey, hold up, hold up.
-Martin: Wait, yeah. -Jay: Hold up.
-Jay: What is that? -Martin: What happened?
Jay: Behind the toilet.
-Easy. -Okay.
Jay: Big possum.
Now, look, there's nothing worse than a cornered possum.
-Martin: Hey... hey. -Jay: I got it, I got it.
-I got him. -Martin: Whoa, whoa, whoa...
Time out, time out-- hey, time out.
She's not even running from us. What are y'all doing?
Look, if that thing was scared of us, it would be gone.
I bet this is just a city possum.
How you doing?
How you doing, little buddy?
Huh? How you doing?
Come here. Come here, friend. Hey.
Hey.
Jay: Man, that thing's cross-eyed.
I know. That's probably why it decided to live up here.
It wouldn't make it long out there on the streets, man.
Jay: Well, that was not what I expected at all.
Turns out...
we got a cross-eyed possum.
That is the biggest possum I've ever seen.
Yeah, she a fatty now.
I don't know how she got so fat with them eyes like that.
Jay: Did not need exterminating.
I think Martin might keep it as a pet.
Martin: Si, get our money!
We found the beast!
Hey, get that thing away from me, boy!
-Where you going? -I'm going out of here!
-Martin: Come on now! -Si: Hey, no,
I'm getting the hell out of here!
Si: This boy's going crazy.
What was that thing anyway?
You see the teeth on that thing?
Good grief, boys.
Bella: Babe, they're still swarming pretty bad.
-I know. -Let's be serious for a second.
Because I know you're excited about this.
But I just don't know
that it's the best time for us to have bees.
We ain't quitting. We're just gonna reassign.
Two weeks from now, I know Christian and Sadie,
they ain't gonna have time to fool with them bees.
I was never about "The Beekeeper."
-I've been about it, I want-- -I know, but I--
I-- hey, I want to do this.
I know you want to do this, and I have a good idea.
I think it's really sweet that Uncle Si wants to do
something with the kids. But, ultimately,
with Uncle Si, Sadie and Bella just need
to kind of do what we all do with him.
Just smile and nod.
Or find some other sucker
and pawn him off on him.
[phone rings]
John Luke: Hey, did you drop off
some bees at our house?
No, did somebody
put some bees at your house?
Two boxes.
We are so in.
Mary Kate says yes.
Si: Yeah, because, I mean, hey, look,
all I want is the honey.
It sounds like a good plan
and a good partnership, John Luke.
John Luke: We're in the honey business now.
Si: Well, hey, that's what I'm talking about.
All right, bye.
He said we can keep 'em.
We should join, like, a bee club.
Rebecca: So one line here. All right, are we...
We're still gonna put balloons down on the...
-Woman: Yeah. -Okay.
Today's the day of the fashion show,
and as you can see, we cleaned the space up
and they caught all the critters,
hopefully, I think, but it's coming together,
and I think it's gonna be great.
Rebecca has made the space so beautiful,
and the kids are gonna be adorable.
I cannot wait to see it.
I got a few pointers for you.
Since this is y'all's first time, look,
you're gonna walk that famous walk over there
and you got to do it with an attitude,
with swagger, with confidence.
Although I would not have chosen Si as the runway coach.
The one I got is called the Silver Cat.
-[hisses] -Willie: Si,
don't scare the children.
-Oh... -I ain't scaring 'em.
I'm telling 'em what to do.
A model's got to have certain moves
to make it in the business.
This one here is called the fluff pop.
[pop]
You can't just...
Boring.
Here's another one, okay?
Duck lips.
Quack, quack, smack, smack, bang, bang.
What about, hey, Honey?
That one's called the kiss.
-Y'all can do that, right? -Okay, say thank you, Uncle Si.
-You're welcome. -Thank you.
-Any time. -I think they got it.
[cheers and applause]
Wow. Thanks, everyone, for coming.
I did not expect to see this crowd.
And I know everyone is so ready to kind of just walk out
because we got very exciting models back here.
So enjoy the show.
[cheers and applause]
[music plays]
-Bella: Okay, ready? Let's go. -Here comes Bella.
[cheers and applause]
Korie: Everyone in the family really came together,
and Rebecca pulled off an amazing show.
[cheers and applause]
[laughter]
Man: You lost your model!
You lost your model!
[cries]
I mean, it had all the elements
that make our family special.
Oh, I made sure of it.
-Aah! -Oh, there's a froggy.
Oh!
Willie: That's a real frog!
-Hey, don't let that thing go. -That's a real frog!
-Si: Whoa! -Willie: That's a real frog!
Although I'm trying to figure out
why I didn't get asked to model,
because my pose face is elite.
Your pose face is something.
[cheers and applause]
Thanks, everyone, for coming. I know it's a little crazy,
but that's what I get for having kids and adult clothing.
[cheers and applause]
-That was awesome. -Oh, we made it through.
-I cannot believe it. -Yep, but hey--
It was crazy, but, hey, we did it.
And you did good, too, baby.
You did so good.
When are we gonna eat the frog legs, son?
Look at him. He's starving.
Hey, look at me. I need some
-nourishment, son. -Jase: Yeah.
-He looks like a frog. -He looks more like a bat.
You know...
I've been battling those lately.
He does kind of look like a bat.
Well, I'll bite you like a bat, too.
With what teeth?
Sharp teeth, boy. Sharp teeth.
Both of them.
How'd you get in on this?
I invited myself.
Well, you can't invite yourself.
Look, I'm gonna crash this party
whether you invite me or not.
I'm in on the frog-eating, okay?
The only way you gonna keep me out
is you will have to call the cops
and have them lock me up.
And then I'm gonna pay my way out of it,
and I'll be there to eat the frogs.
Okay, since apparently I've traumatized our grandkids
with my frog processing...
Yeah, one of them jumped on Holland's head.
...I have been advised by my attorney
that I actually can't make 'em eat the frogs.
So, therefore, I got a lot of legs to get rid of.
You know what you should do with them?
-What? -Do 'em hot legs,
like the hot wings.
I got, like, 40 bottles of hot sauce.
My mom gets it for me for Christmas.
Weird, I know.
But you could see who's the toughest of your kids
by seeing who can eat the hottest legs.
It's like the Hot Ones show.
You give them really hot frog legs,
and then you just ask 'em about their personal lives
and ask weird questions
and see what they say while they sweat.
You're gonna ruin a good bunch of frog legs
putting hot sauce on 'em.
No, that actually kind of makes sense.
But we'll figure out what happened to John Luke--
That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life.
-John D: No, this is what-- -It's fun.
But Johnny D, that is a good idea.
I mean, you've got your own issues,
but that's a great idea.
That was a real Robertson compliment.
[laughs]
Compliment sandwich. Insult, compliment, insult.
Martin: Yeah, it was in there somewhere.
I'm actually surprised that you had a good idea.
Hey, maybe we'll learn some stuff about
who can take it, and somebody may surprise me.
Is spicy food like a truth serum or something?
If you start sweating and feel like
your innards are gonna pour out of your butt,
truth comes out.
[laughs]
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to our first annual Hot Legs...
Hot Legs!
-...contest! -Korie: Yeah!
We had so many frog legs,
we wanted to do a little competition.
We will start out with some not-so-spicy legs,
and we will progress up
until we get to really spicy sauces
and extra spicy questions.
Korie: I'm really excited.
I think this is gonna be so much fun
to just hear all their answers to these questions.
I'm excited, too, but for completely different reasons.
'Cause, let me tell you something,
when I eat too much hot sauce,
there's pain in the oral region.
-Ew. -And the anal region.
-Oh, that-- -It's the whole thing.
I know, but that's disgusting, no.
It's real. You should eat more hot sauce.
You'll figure it out.
The first one is titled Pinch and Suck.
Willie: Pinch and Suck.
Willie: All right, dip and bite.
If you had to trade lives with one sibling for a week,
who would you choose?
And what would you immediately change about their life?
-Rebecca: Wow. -Korie: Ooh.
-It's a two-part question. -Spicy.
-Mary Kate: Spicy. -Okay, I would trade with Jacob.
-Rebecca. -John Luke.
Bella. What would I change?
Maybe I would pick a different husband, but--
-[all laugh] -Whoa!
She changed you and left you.
Good call.
On to the Girls Gone Mild.
Willie: Girls Gone Mild.
The questions are getting a little spicier, okay.
Which family member is the most dramatic when sick?
-Bella for sure. -[all laugh]
-When sick?! -Oh, sorry, you, you.
You didn't even have to think about-- what?
-Korie. -Korie.
What? I have been to the hospital
the least times in my life.
It's not the hospital. One time, Korie said
that Bella had diabetes based on symptoms
-of a cold. -That is true.
Jacob: That is a true statement.
She said, "This looks like diabetes,
you know, but you have bronchitis."
We are heating up here.
We are heating up with Round Three.
This is just what we like to call Hawt.
We are now gonna let
the person to your left
dip for you.
John Luke: Oh, Rebecca. Oh, Rebecca.
-John Reed: That is hawt. -Christian: That's good.
-Jacob: Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho. -That's good.
Jacob: I think some people might get out this round.
If the family was on a survival competition show,
who would you vote off first and why?
I'm definitely voting off Christian.
-Christian. -I'm voting Rebecca
off the island. Rebecca's-- I'm voting Rebecca off.
Willie: Okay, who are we voting off the island and why?
-You. -Oh.
Whoo!
[laughs]
Willie: Next question,
we are going with straight up Fire.
Fire!
Now...
the person on the other side
gets to dip your wing in the Fire.
Oh, no, dude.
-Hope you were nice! -No chance.
-Willie: I hope you were nice. -Jacob: No ch-- I'm screwed.
Willie: Name something weird
your spouse does that no one knows.
John Luke.
I'm about to throw up.
-Willie: John Reed. -What was the question again?
Willie: Christian.
She farts when she laughs.
Willie: She farts when she laughs.
Okay, final one.
Willie: Would everyone please
pull out their last leg?
I want everyone's last leg
on their plate please.
-I am gonna personally... -Christian: Oh, my...
What? No.
-Oh, no. -This one's thick!
-I don't like that. -Oh, it's a thick burn.
-Willie: Purple Pain. -woman: Have you tried it?
woman: No, it just, like, gets hotter...
Oh, my gosh. I don't want to throw up on TV.
Willie: No, it would be great.
[laughs]
It's got a little afterburn to it.
I don't think I can swallow it.
John Luke!
Who gives the worst advice,
but acts the most confident while giving it?
Christian: Oh, no.
See, the questions were just a distraction to draw them in.
I was looking for that Purple Pain.
Okay, you might be enjoying this
-a little too much. -I am.
[laughs]
man: He's convulsing!
I need milk.
Jacob: Oh, Bec is on the milk! Bec in on the milk!
Aah!
I got it in my left eye.
Squirt my eye.
-Willie: Squirt his eye, Honey. -Oh! Oh!
Oh!
My tongue!
It's my tongue. I can't talk.
My tongue, dude, get up!
Well, I would call that a success.
Mission accomplished.
I'm still not sure what that mission was.
And yet we accomplished it.
Hey, I want to thank all y'all
for participating in our first annual Hot Legs.
Hurry up.
-I'm sweating. -Christian: Hurry up.
My tongue, dude. Get up!
Bro-- oh, my God.
Bro, you sprayed me.
Willie: Okay, let's have our family dinner.
All right, let's pray.
Father, we're so grateful for this day.
Thank you so much for our family.
Thank you for all the things you created,
the frogs and everything else.
And thank you for the humor and the spirit of this family.
We're grateful to you.
We pray all this through Jesus.
-Amen. -Amen.
Facing down Mother Nature can yield all sort of surprises.
-More frog legs. -Christian: Ooh, yay.
More frog legs.
Willie: Whether it's a delicious
country-fried amphibian...
Every frog you saw at the fashion show
is now in your stomach.
There's some fashionable frogs.
Willie: Bathtub full of nature's sweet golden nectar...
Are our bees making honey yet?
Not yet. I'll still have to figure it out.
Honey would be good on this ice cream right now.
John Luke: Yeah, we need honey instead of hot sauce.
Even a new spicy
Robertson family tradition.
John Reed: Hey, Willie, try some Purple Pain please.
-man: ...eyes start watering. -John Reed: Please try
some Purple Pain. One little dab.
I've lived my Purple Pain.
No, I'd prefer not to replace my entire bathroom.