1 00:00:05,380 --> 00:00:09,635 This Fourth of July will mark America's 250th birthday. 2 00:00:10,594 --> 00:00:13,013 To honor this moment, we want to take a look back 3 00:00:13,096 --> 00:00:16,015 at some of the events, people, and ideas 4 00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:20,103 that helped shape and preserve our grand experiment in self-government. 5 00:00:20,187 --> 00:00:23,190 Our Founding Fathers drafted a charter 6 00:00:23,273 --> 00:00:26,276 to guarantee the rule of law and the rights of man. 7 00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:28,654 Together, they established a new nation, 8 00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:31,448 one where power resided not with a monarch, 9 00:00:32,031 --> 00:00:33,575 but with ordinary citizens. 10 00:00:34,952 --> 00:00:37,955 "We hold these truths to be self-evident," they wrote. 11 00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:40,666 "That all men are created equal." 12 00:00:41,583 --> 00:00:44,795 It was a radical idea, revolutionary even. 13 00:00:45,837 --> 00:00:48,298 But what truly makes America unique 14 00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:51,760 is the fact that we've always been a work in progress. 15 00:00:51,843 --> 00:00:52,844 We're not perfect. 16 00:00:53,470 --> 00:00:58,433 We can be irascible, petty, selfish, cheap. 17 00:00:58,976 --> 00:01:00,269 And let's face it, some of us 18 00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:02,521 will always find something to complain about. 19 00:01:02,604 --> 00:01:03,730 But as Americans, 20 00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:06,942 we have always found a way to overcome these naysayers, 21 00:01:07,025 --> 00:01:11,321 these deeply unpleasant people who stood in the way of progress. 22 00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:15,701 These miserable, intolerable... Did I mention petty? 23 00:01:15,784 --> 00:01:18,078 -Wretched-- -Hey, none of that's in the script! 24 00:01:41,059 --> 00:01:45,606 By the winter of 1775, the Continental Congress realized 25 00:01:45,689 --> 00:01:49,693 that independence from Britain was the only course of action. 26 00:01:49,776 --> 00:01:52,946 A committee of five was charged with drafting an announcement 27 00:01:53,030 --> 00:01:56,158 explaining the reasons for the rejection of the monarchy, 28 00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:58,702 a declaration of independence. 29 00:01:59,202 --> 00:02:02,706 They were John Adams, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, 30 00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:05,792 Roger Sherman, and Robert Livingston. 31 00:02:06,335 --> 00:02:09,670 It's common knowledge that Thomas Jefferson wrote the first draft. 32 00:02:09,755 --> 00:02:14,551 But actually, it was Robert Livingston who took the first crack at it. 33 00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:20,265 And some say that's exactly what he was on when he wrote it. 34 00:02:21,058 --> 00:02:23,393 Gentlemen of the Continental Congress, 35 00:02:23,894 --> 00:02:28,065 we finally have a first draft of the Declaration of Independence, 36 00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:32,569 written by our esteemed colleague, Robert Livingston. 37 00:02:33,195 --> 00:02:35,322 -Here, here. -Well done. 38 00:02:36,198 --> 00:02:37,240 Well done. 39 00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:39,993 Really didn't take me that long. Only used two quills. 40 00:02:41,036 --> 00:02:43,538 -Two quills. -We are in gratitude. 41 00:02:43,622 --> 00:02:44,665 Stop it. 42 00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:49,461 But we agreed that we would only have 27 grievances. 43 00:02:50,379 --> 00:02:52,964 Then all of a sudden you added all of these other grievances. 44 00:02:53,048 --> 00:02:57,052 Agreed. There are several, and they are beyond perplexing. 45 00:02:57,135 --> 00:03:01,765 Mr. Jefferson, I don't think that we want to limit Rembrandt 46 00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:04,434 on how many colors he can use when he paints. Do we? 47 00:03:05,936 --> 00:03:10,774 But we just have a few questions about some of the things that you wrote. 48 00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:13,985 Like, "If someone invites you to a dinner party, 49 00:03:14,069 --> 00:03:17,698 you are legally within your rights as an American citizen 50 00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:23,120 to ask who is coming to that dinner party before you accept." 51 00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:24,454 Don't you want to know 52 00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:27,833 who you're going to be spending your evening sitting next to? 53 00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:30,794 I got invited to a dinner at Madison's a few weeks ago. 54 00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:34,005 Alexander Hamilton was at the same table. 55 00:03:34,089 --> 00:03:36,007 Did I get a chance to talk to Hamilton? 56 00:03:36,091 --> 00:03:39,386 No, because I was seated next to Madison's uncle, 57 00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:43,098 a tobacco farmer from Virginia. 58 00:03:43,180 --> 00:03:45,142 What a waste of time that was, 59 00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:47,269 plus the two hours getting there in the coach. 60 00:03:47,352 --> 00:03:50,188 Why leave the house? Takes two hours to get everywhere. 61 00:03:50,272 --> 00:03:52,149 I wish I could put that in the document. 62 00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:56,111 Robert, you want to put into this Declaration of Independence, 63 00:03:56,194 --> 00:04:00,031 "It is illegal to share an umbrella." 64 00:04:00,699 --> 00:04:05,120 If it's raining, bring your own umbrella. Don't infringe on someone else's. 65 00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:08,790 What if the umbrella holder offers to share the umbrella? 66 00:04:08,874 --> 00:04:11,501 Well, if he does, he's only doing it to be nice. 67 00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:13,879 He doesn't want to share it. It's not right. 68 00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:18,216 You forgot your umbrella? Too bad. Too bad. 69 00:04:18,300 --> 00:04:22,387 Get wet. Live with it. Don't get somebody else wet 70 00:04:22,471 --> 00:04:25,390 'cause you're too stupid to bring your own. 71 00:04:25,474 --> 00:04:27,893 Sir, "After January 7th, 72 00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:30,771 it is illegal to wish anyone a Happy New Year"? 73 00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:32,647 Precisely, Adams. 74 00:04:32,731 --> 00:04:34,191 Even if it is the first time 75 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:36,568 you're encountering the person in the New Year? 76 00:04:36,651 --> 00:04:39,529 That's right, Franklin. Even if it's the first time. 77 00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:43,700 These "Happy New Years," they go on endlessly and endlessly. 78 00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:48,163 January 20th, "Happy New Year." January 25th, "Happy New Year." 79 00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:50,999 January 31st, "Ha--" When... When does it end? 80 00:04:51,082 --> 00:04:52,167 Why is this in here? 81 00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:54,920 "It is illegal to take deep breaths outside." 82 00:04:55,837 --> 00:04:57,172 Well, it should be. 83 00:04:57,255 --> 00:04:58,757 You want to see people walking around going... 84 00:05:01,426 --> 00:05:02,594 "What a beautiful day." 85 00:05:04,513 --> 00:05:07,182 Here's another gem. "No sharing desserts." 86 00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:11,019 "If you want a dessert, order it. None of this, 'Pass it around.'" 87 00:05:11,102 --> 00:05:14,272 We're not animals, Mr. Franklin, all eating out of a trough. 88 00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:15,982 We could all have our own forks. 89 00:05:16,066 --> 00:05:18,693 Then we'll all take bites, put the forks in our mouths, 90 00:05:18,777 --> 00:05:21,571 put it back in the pie after it's been in our mouths. 91 00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:23,615 Mr. Franklin, it's unsanitary. 92 00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:26,284 Sometimes I don't want a whole slice of pie. 93 00:05:26,368 --> 00:05:27,786 I just want a taste of pie. 94 00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:31,331 Get your own damn piece of pie, Franklin! 95 00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:33,082 "If you pick a line... 96 00:05:33,917 --> 00:05:35,418 you have to stay in it"? 97 00:05:35,502 --> 00:05:39,506 Of course, you have to stay in it. Otherwise, it's just-- It's chaos. 98 00:05:39,589 --> 00:05:41,758 "That line's moving faster. I'll go over here." 99 00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:44,886 "Oh, no. I don't want to go here." And now, all of a sudden, 100 00:05:44,970 --> 00:05:46,888 you're bumping into people, and fights break out, 101 00:05:46,972 --> 00:05:50,100 all because people want to get on the line that's moving faster? 102 00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:53,353 No. You pick your line, you stay in your line. 103 00:05:53,436 --> 00:05:55,605 -That's how it works. -I disagree with that, 104 00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:57,357 and I don't think it should be in this document. 105 00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:58,775 Oh, yeah, you don't like that, Hancock? 106 00:05:58,859 --> 00:06:00,402 I guess because you don't have to wait in line. 107 00:06:00,485 --> 00:06:02,737 You have your servants doing that for you. I have servants. 108 00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:04,656 Do I treat them fairly? I like to think so. 109 00:06:04,739 --> 00:06:07,242 Do I spare the lash? Not always. 110 00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:09,202 It's fun. It's fun, the lashing. 111 00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:11,329 You smack 'em, you smack 'em, you smack 'em, 112 00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:13,456 you hear a little whimper, and then you stop. 113 00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:16,835 "Men shall refrain from fanning themselves in public"? 114 00:06:16,918 --> 00:06:19,462 Does anybody really want to see this? 115 00:06:19,504 --> 00:06:22,591 This is something you want to see men do? 116 00:06:22,674 --> 00:06:24,718 This? This motion? 117 00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:28,597 Mr. Adams, I submit to you, do you want your son fanning? 118 00:06:29,472 --> 00:06:30,807 As I thought. 119 00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:34,603 He doesn't want his son fanning. I don't want my son fanning. 120 00:06:34,686 --> 00:06:38,398 I don't think any of you people want your sons fanning. 121 00:06:38,481 --> 00:06:43,236 -Who's with me? Yea or nay? -Nay! 122 00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:46,156 Here's another that should not go in. 123 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:48,742 "It's illegal to tell someone about your dream." 124 00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:52,412 "No matter how interesting it may seem to the dreamer, 125 00:06:52,495 --> 00:06:56,457 the others have no interest in hearing about it." 126 00:06:56,541 --> 00:07:01,630 Gentlemen, we have a lifespan of 38 years on this earth! 127 00:07:01,713 --> 00:07:05,800 And we're going to waste it listening to other people's dreams? 128 00:07:06,301 --> 00:07:07,427 I don't think so. 129 00:07:07,510 --> 00:07:11,514 -I am 70 years on this earth, you fop. -Seventy? 130 00:07:11,598 --> 00:07:15,268 Apparently engaging in cunnilingus with French women keeps one young. 131 00:07:15,352 --> 00:07:18,563 You, sir, have discovered the fountain of youth. 132 00:07:18,647 --> 00:07:20,440 My congratulations to you. 133 00:07:20,523 --> 00:07:23,401 "There should be a national ban on toasting"? 134 00:07:23,485 --> 00:07:24,861 "No gratuities"? 135 00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:30,325 "If you begin a new health routine, keep it to yourself"? 136 00:07:30,408 --> 00:07:31,952 "If you visit England, 137 00:07:32,034 --> 00:07:35,330 don't suddenly return with an English accent." 138 00:07:35,413 --> 00:07:37,832 "It is illegal to stroke one's beard"? 139 00:07:37,916 --> 00:07:39,417 That should be in the document. 140 00:07:39,501 --> 00:07:43,713 Here's a truth I hold to be self-evident. You, sir, are an imbecile. 141 00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:47,050 Gentlemen, gentlemen, what are we doing? 142 00:07:47,842 --> 00:07:51,554 These are barely grievances. They are petty complaints, 143 00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:55,266 and they have nothing to do with a declaration of independence 144 00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:57,018 from England and tyranny. 145 00:07:57,102 --> 00:07:58,979 -Here, here! -Here, here! 146 00:08:00,897 --> 00:08:05,276 This is not just a declaration of independence. 147 00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:10,240 This is a declaration of common sense. 148 00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:15,370 In 250 years, our descendants will thank us 149 00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:17,706 for the great work that we've done here, 150 00:08:17,789 --> 00:08:21,418 making their lives immeasurably better. 151 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,336 Gentlemen, are you with me? 152 00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:26,131 -Yea or nay? -Nay! 153 00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:28,008 A thousand times nay. 154 00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:34,389 Mr. Livingston, thank you so much for all of your hard work, 155 00:08:34,472 --> 00:08:39,644 but I don't think that any of this is going into our declaration. 156 00:08:40,311 --> 00:08:43,148 -Jefferson, want to take a shot? -Yeah, I'll do it. 157 00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:44,858 I won't be using any of this, 158 00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:47,610 especially, "No clapping along to the music 159 00:08:47,694 --> 00:08:49,654 and expecting others to join in." 160 00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:54,325 -Marshals, escort him out. -That won't be necessary. 161 00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:59,914 Because I don't want to live in a country where people share umbrellas, 162 00:08:59,998 --> 00:09:02,250 take deep breaths outside, 163 00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:05,211 change lines willy-nilly, 164 00:09:05,754 --> 00:09:09,799 fan themselves, stroke their beards, 165 00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:12,677 share dreams, and desserts. 166 00:09:13,928 --> 00:09:15,930 Happy New Year, assholes! 167 00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:29,527 On March 7th, 1876, 168 00:09:29,611 --> 00:09:32,739 Alexander Graham Bell successfully received a patent 169 00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:36,201 for a device he called the telephone. 170 00:09:36,284 --> 00:09:38,161 Days later, in front of the public, 171 00:09:38,244 --> 00:09:42,999 he made the first ever telephone call to his assistant, Thomas Watson. 172 00:09:43,665 --> 00:09:48,004 The first phone call was a glorious day for American innovation. 173 00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:50,215 Alas, not so much for Bell. 174 00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:02,102 Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. 175 00:10:02,185 --> 00:10:05,772 On behalf of my wife, Mabel, I would like to welcome you to our home. 176 00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:07,398 Thank you for coming. 177 00:10:07,482 --> 00:10:11,736 What you are about to witness has never been seen before 178 00:10:12,403 --> 00:10:13,696 in human history. 179 00:10:14,405 --> 00:10:15,698 I give you... 180 00:10:16,741 --> 00:10:17,784 the telephone. 181 00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:22,997 My assistant Watson is in another building, 182 00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:24,916 out of sight and sound. 183 00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:27,043 But with this device, 184 00:10:28,419 --> 00:10:30,797 I will be able to communicate with him... 185 00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:34,884 as if he was standing right next to me. 186 00:10:36,594 --> 00:10:40,473 I will pick up the phone on my side, and it will ring on his. 187 00:10:40,557 --> 00:10:41,850 What kind of ring? 188 00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:46,062 Normal ring. It's just a ring. It's a ring. 189 00:10:46,938 --> 00:10:48,273 It's a typical ring. 190 00:10:48,356 --> 00:10:51,943 Maybe there could be a menu of rings that people could choose from. 191 00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:54,279 Oh, yes. I would like mine to sound like a doorbell. 192 00:10:54,362 --> 00:10:56,447 I'd like mine to sound like a clown horn. 193 00:10:56,531 --> 00:10:58,575 Or perhaps a bicycle ring, you know? 194 00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:02,370 All wonderful ideas, but hardly the point. 195 00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:07,917 The point is, I'll be able to communicate with someone who is miles away. 196 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:09,919 What if I'm at a piano recital, say, 197 00:11:10,003 --> 00:11:12,547 and I don't want it to ring, so it just vibrates 198 00:11:12,630 --> 00:11:14,883 like a... like a Jew's harp in your pocket? 199 00:11:14,966 --> 00:11:16,509 Oh, yes. 200 00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:20,013 That's just a fascinating idea. 201 00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:23,266 -What if you could send short little-- -What if you invent your own? 202 00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:25,351 Go off and invent your own. 203 00:11:25,435 --> 00:11:26,895 That's not this. 204 00:11:26,978 --> 00:11:29,689 You want something that vibrates? Go! 205 00:11:29,772 --> 00:11:32,692 Go invent it! This is all nonsense! 206 00:11:32,775 --> 00:11:35,153 Does anybody else have anything else they'd like to add? 207 00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:38,948 -Are colors available? -Or could it play like a song? 208 00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:44,120 Are you done? Would you like to see a demonstration? 209 00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:45,496 -Yes, yes. -Please. 210 00:11:45,580 --> 00:11:47,123 We don't know why it's taking so long. 211 00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:49,542 Would you please get out? 212 00:11:49,626 --> 00:11:50,627 -Me? -You. 213 00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:52,712 -Yes, you. You. You! -Okay. Thank you. Lovely party. 214 00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:54,464 -Get out! -Thank you. Thank you so much. 215 00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:55,548 -Get out! -Thanks. 216 00:11:55,632 --> 00:11:57,258 Who the hell is she? 217 00:11:57,342 --> 00:11:59,928 -I have no idea-- -What is she doing here? 218 00:12:00,011 --> 00:12:02,805 I hate her! I don't even feel like doing it now. 219 00:12:03,389 --> 00:12:05,892 -Please! -I don't even want to do it. 220 00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:07,185 Yes, you do want to do it. 221 00:12:07,268 --> 00:12:10,605 You worked on it night and day for months and months. 222 00:12:10,688 --> 00:12:13,191 Sorry, I just thought of one more thing that would be so fun-- 223 00:12:13,274 --> 00:12:14,442 Shut up! 224 00:12:14,525 --> 00:12:16,444 -Do you want to see this or not? -Yes, very much. 225 00:12:16,527 --> 00:12:18,821 Really? 'Cause it doesn't seem like you do. 226 00:12:18,905 --> 00:12:21,032 -Everybody-- -It doesn't seem like you do. 227 00:12:21,115 --> 00:12:24,077 It seems like you just want to hear yourselves talk. 228 00:12:24,619 --> 00:12:26,871 Is that what you want? Is that what you came here for? 229 00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:29,707 -God damn it! -Darling. 230 00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:31,668 Fucking assholes! 231 00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:44,472 Mr. Watson, can you hear me? 232 00:12:45,515 --> 00:12:48,268 Indeed I can, Alexander. 233 00:12:50,645 --> 00:12:54,190 He can hear me! He can hear me! 234 00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:55,275 Watson! 235 00:12:55,358 --> 00:13:00,905 This is a step forward in science and communication. 236 00:13:00,989 --> 00:13:05,201 I could not have done it without your able assistance. 237 00:13:05,285 --> 00:13:08,037 It is a time for celebration. 238 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:09,205 Indeed. 239 00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:12,375 So... 240 00:13:14,335 --> 00:13:15,920 What are... What are you doing? 241 00:13:17,380 --> 00:13:18,423 Not a lot. 242 00:13:21,676 --> 00:13:23,344 I'm sitting on a chair. 243 00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:28,099 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, me too. Me too. I'm on a chair. 244 00:13:29,559 --> 00:13:30,685 Well... 245 00:13:31,978 --> 00:13:34,105 Okay. Okay. 246 00:13:34,188 --> 00:13:38,109 Alexander, do you remember when we went to that science convention? 247 00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:40,111 -Where was that? -Cleveland. 248 00:13:40,194 --> 00:13:41,612 We were at that hotel. 249 00:13:41,696 --> 00:13:45,950 Do you remember all of the hedges, the topiary work that was done? 250 00:13:46,034 --> 00:13:48,077 That landscaper was amazing. 251 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:52,081 -Yes, it was-- -There were elephants and seals, 252 00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:53,499 -and there was the giraffe... -Yeah. 253 00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:57,420 ...and I think they used a tree for the giraffe's neck, 254 00:13:57,503 --> 00:13:58,838 which I don't think it's fair. 255 00:13:58,921 --> 00:14:03,509 I think when you are doing topiary work, you should be a purist. 256 00:14:03,593 --> 00:14:06,804 -You only use the hedges. -Yeah, okay, all right-- 257 00:14:06,888 --> 00:14:09,515 And the gardens! The gardens were beautiful. 258 00:14:09,599 --> 00:14:12,852 You picked some lilies, which I didn't think was right. 259 00:14:12,935 --> 00:14:14,604 Yeah, all right. Okay. 260 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,522 But you don't pick flowers... -All right, we're good. 261 00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:19,442 -...from someone else's garden. -We're good. I gotta take off, but-- 262 00:14:19,525 --> 00:14:21,402 You know what I've been meaning to tell you? 263 00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:25,365 Yeah, all right. Watson, I got some people here. I gotta get going. 264 00:14:25,448 --> 00:14:27,867 -My cousin sent me a letter. -Oh, my God. 265 00:14:27,950 --> 00:14:30,828 He met some people with the last name Grahamm, but two M's. 266 00:14:30,912 --> 00:14:32,538 I put the letter aside. 267 00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:34,957 You don't spell it ever with two Ms, do you? 268 00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:37,502 -Watson, shut up! -No. Why would you-- 269 00:14:37,585 --> 00:14:38,961 -Shut up, Watson. -That's a hat on a hat. 270 00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:40,588 Okay, they got two M's. 271 00:14:40,671 --> 00:14:42,215 -Yeah, but see-- -Watson, I got people here. 272 00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:44,050 -You know, you only-- -I gotta get off the phone. 273 00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:48,596 You only use two M's if you have to say "mm," or "yummy." 274 00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,890 Do you know any Grahams that spell with two M's? 275 00:14:50,973 --> 00:14:53,726 No, I don't know any Grahams. I don't know any Grahams with one M! 276 00:14:53,810 --> 00:14:55,395 I don't know any Grahamms with two M's! 277 00:14:55,478 --> 00:14:58,356 I don't know any Grahammms with three M's! 278 00:15:07,198 --> 00:15:08,491 I think we got cut off. 279 00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:12,203 Do you remember the ducks and the little ducklings followed behind? 280 00:15:12,286 --> 00:15:15,123 But that was adorable. It just hit me when we were off-- 281 00:15:28,428 --> 00:15:30,680 The First World War began in 1914 282 00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:33,808 and pitted the Central Powers, Germany, Austria-Hungary, 283 00:15:33,891 --> 00:15:37,520 Bulgaria and the Ottoman Empire, against the Allied powers, 284 00:15:37,603 --> 00:15:40,690 France, Russia, Italy, Great Britain, Romania, 285 00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:42,817 Canada, and Japan. 286 00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:46,070 The United States joined the Allies in 1917 287 00:15:46,154 --> 00:15:48,781 after Germany sank many American ships, 288 00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:51,993 including the luxury cruise liner, The Lusitania, 289 00:15:52,076 --> 00:15:54,662 which carried hundreds of American passengers. 290 00:15:55,413 --> 00:15:57,790 Nothing encapsulates the horrors of this war 291 00:15:57,874 --> 00:15:59,542 more than trench warfare, 292 00:15:59,625 --> 00:16:02,545 with its unprecedented levels of destruction and carnage. 293 00:16:03,254 --> 00:16:07,633 By the end of the war, more than 16 million people were dead. 294 00:16:08,718 --> 00:16:12,221 So many soldiers bravely fought and died for their country. 295 00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:14,599 Of course, there were exceptions. 296 00:16:28,738 --> 00:16:30,281 I don't think I can do this. 297 00:16:30,865 --> 00:16:32,408 I've lost so many friends already. 298 00:16:33,034 --> 00:16:35,828 The good news is now you don't have to worry about keeping in touch. 299 00:16:35,912 --> 00:16:39,707 Hey, if I don't make it back, I need you to do me a big favor. 300 00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:43,294 Can you... Can you deliver this letter to my girl, Greta? 301 00:16:43,377 --> 00:16:44,545 Me? 302 00:16:44,629 --> 00:16:46,547 I have a few more lines I need to get down. 303 00:16:46,631 --> 00:16:47,715 Listen, I'm very flattered. 304 00:16:47,798 --> 00:16:49,926 That's very nice of you to think of me in that light, 305 00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:53,638 but you got the wrong guy. I'm a-- I'm very irresponsible. 306 00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:55,473 I... I lose stuff all the time. 307 00:16:55,556 --> 00:16:57,808 One day, I was looking around for my glasses, 308 00:16:57,892 --> 00:16:59,352 and they were on my head the whole day. 309 00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:01,145 -I was looking for hours and hours. -Incoming! 310 00:17:04,147 --> 00:17:07,443 -It has to be you. Please. -I can mail it, right? 311 00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:10,154 No, I need you to deliver this in person. 312 00:17:10,238 --> 00:17:12,031 -Where does she live? -Albuquerque. 313 00:17:12,114 --> 00:17:14,075 Albuquerque? Are you kidding? 314 00:17:14,157 --> 00:17:15,785 Thanks, David. I'm gonna go finish this up. 315 00:17:15,867 --> 00:17:17,744 Hey! Albuquerque? 316 00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:21,999 I-- Why don't you get Wojokowski? He lives in Santa Fe. 317 00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:24,335 -Wojo! Anybody seen Wojo? -No, sorry. 318 00:17:24,417 --> 00:17:25,752 -You seen Wojo? -No, no. 319 00:17:25,836 --> 00:17:28,673 I was just saying I can't wait to get back home to my Daisy. 320 00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:32,552 That's what's waiting for me. 321 00:17:33,469 --> 00:17:35,805 -Yeah. -What does that noise mean? 322 00:17:35,888 --> 00:17:37,723 Yeah. Yeah. 323 00:17:37,807 --> 00:17:39,517 -She's all right. -Do you not think she's pretty? 324 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:42,270 -No. Yeah, she's all right. Yeah. -She's "all right"? 325 00:17:42,353 --> 00:17:45,147 -Yeah, if you like her. You like her? -Yeah. Yeah, yeah. 326 00:17:45,231 --> 00:17:46,566 -There you go. -Okay. 327 00:17:46,649 --> 00:17:48,150 -Okay. -But you don't think she's pretty? 328 00:17:48,234 --> 00:17:50,236 I would take her to the movies if she paid. 329 00:17:50,319 --> 00:17:51,612 If she didn't pay... 330 00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:53,406 not so sure. 331 00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:55,324 I don't know. Hey, she's not my type. 332 00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:56,742 -Right. -We all have types. 333 00:17:56,826 --> 00:17:57,952 -Okay. -She's your type. 334 00:17:58,035 --> 00:17:59,203 Yeah, what's your type? 335 00:18:00,538 --> 00:18:02,039 Yeah. Yeah. 336 00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:04,417 More noises. Why are-- Why? 337 00:18:04,500 --> 00:18:08,129 -Sometimes noises can be very expressive. -How hard is it to just say yes? 338 00:18:08,212 --> 00:18:10,464 I say, "Is she pretty?" You say, "Yes," and we move on. 339 00:18:10,548 --> 00:18:13,175 Yeah, yeah. You know, you startled me into honesty. 340 00:18:13,259 --> 00:18:16,429 If you had come up to me ten minutes ago and said, 341 00:18:16,512 --> 00:18:18,848 "Hey, in ten minutes, I'm gonna show you a picture of my girlfriend," 342 00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:21,851 I could have come up with a lie that would have made you very happy. 343 00:18:22,435 --> 00:18:23,728 So, it's my fault? 344 00:18:25,688 --> 00:18:28,441 -What does the noise mean? -Most likely. 345 00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:33,029 -All right, men. It's time. -It's Sarge. 346 00:18:33,779 --> 00:18:38,117 I need you to say your prayers and prepare to charge. 347 00:18:39,493 --> 00:18:43,331 On my command, you will go over the top into no man's land. 348 00:18:43,414 --> 00:18:47,835 You will sprint through a hail of bullets, and you will get to Fritz 349 00:18:47,918 --> 00:18:50,671 and you will go doolally on those bastards-- 350 00:18:50,755 --> 00:18:53,049 We're gonna doolally. I'm a doolally-er. 351 00:18:53,132 --> 00:18:55,926 -I'm a doolally-er. -Can I get a doolally? 352 00:18:56,010 --> 00:18:57,511 -A doolally. -Doolally! 353 00:18:57,595 --> 00:18:59,347 Are you ready to go lick the Kaiser? 354 00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:04,644 Lick a, lick a, lick a, lick a! Lick 'em. Lick the Kaiser. 355 00:19:04,727 --> 00:19:06,103 -Charge. -Charge. 356 00:19:06,187 --> 00:19:08,939 Up and over. Over the top. Come on, men. 357 00:19:09,023 --> 00:19:11,901 -Let's go. -After you. Go ahead. After you. 358 00:19:11,984 --> 00:19:13,653 Come on, David. Get up there. 359 00:19:13,736 --> 00:19:16,739 -Come on. Keep going. -Mommy! 360 00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:40,054 Private David, move your ass! 361 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:43,432 Come on, men! Let's go! 362 00:19:45,393 --> 00:19:46,560 Keep moving! 363 00:19:59,782 --> 00:20:03,244 Private Wallace, stop playing with yourself and move out. 364 00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:04,453 Yes, sir. 365 00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:05,746 Just a sec, Sarge. 366 00:20:06,789 --> 00:20:07,873 All right. 367 00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:26,600 I'm alive! 368 00:20:28,394 --> 00:20:29,812 Oh, my God! 369 00:20:29,895 --> 00:20:33,691 -I'm alive! Thank you, God! -What happened? 370 00:20:33,774 --> 00:20:37,027 -What happened? -What? I got shot! I got shot! 371 00:20:37,111 --> 00:20:39,321 Where? I don't see a... a bullet hole anywhere. 372 00:20:42,742 --> 00:20:43,951 Wow. 373 00:20:44,034 --> 00:20:47,163 The bullet must have gone right through me. It's a miracle. 374 00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:49,874 -I'll get the medic. -The medic? No, no, no, no. 375 00:20:49,957 --> 00:20:52,877 Don't bother the medic. He's got limbs to saw off. 376 00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,921 He's got a lot of work to do. No medics whatsoever. 377 00:20:56,005 --> 00:20:57,673 You seem totally fine. 378 00:20:57,757 --> 00:20:59,258 You know what must have happened? 379 00:20:59,759 --> 00:21:02,636 I think a bullet whizzed by my head. 380 00:21:03,888 --> 00:21:05,055 Yeah. 381 00:21:05,139 --> 00:21:07,016 -And I lost consciousness. -Wow. 382 00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:09,518 You seem really, very, very healthy, put together. 383 00:21:09,602 --> 00:21:12,396 I was dead. I believed I was dead. 384 00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:14,148 -But no bullet, but dead. -No. 385 00:21:14,231 --> 00:21:15,983 You know, I thought it was the afterlife. 386 00:21:16,066 --> 00:21:18,402 You're still kind of trapped in your own head in the afterlife. 387 00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:21,655 You're still yourself, a person you don't really like that much. 388 00:21:21,739 --> 00:21:23,616 So, the afterlife is no bonus. 389 00:21:23,699 --> 00:21:27,119 There is an afterlife, but not the bonus that you would want. 390 00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:30,039 -Can I propose a different theory? -Sure. 391 00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:33,209 I think you pretended to get shot and then laid down there 392 00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:35,002 while the rest of us were getting shot at. 393 00:21:35,085 --> 00:21:40,633 That is, without a doubt, the most insulting, disgusting thing 394 00:21:40,716 --> 00:21:42,676 anyone has ever said to me in my life. 395 00:21:43,177 --> 00:21:45,137 How dare you? How dare you? 396 00:21:45,221 --> 00:21:47,848 Okay. I think I get it. 397 00:21:47,932 --> 00:21:50,476 This is about what I said about Daisy, right? 398 00:21:50,559 --> 00:21:53,354 Yeah, for sure. I've really been thinking about it. 399 00:21:53,896 --> 00:21:56,857 And I've been reevaluating the entire situation. 400 00:21:56,941 --> 00:21:59,652 And my assessment was so off. 401 00:21:59,735 --> 00:22:01,487 I don't even know what I was talking about. 402 00:22:01,570 --> 00:22:04,573 She's a beauty. Do you realize how lucky you are? 403 00:22:04,657 --> 00:22:06,700 Not only would I take her to the movies and pay for her, 404 00:22:06,784 --> 00:22:08,327 I would take her to dinner and pay for her. 405 00:22:08,410 --> 00:22:11,247 I would buy champagne, and I would walk her to her door. 406 00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:13,624 And if she invited me in, well, you better believe... 407 00:22:13,707 --> 00:22:15,543 -No, no, no, no, no. Too far. -...I would go running in. 408 00:22:15,626 --> 00:22:17,336 -It's too far. That is too far. -I would go-- 409 00:22:17,419 --> 00:22:20,714 Is there a way to make a copy of a picture like that? 410 00:22:20,798 --> 00:22:23,509 No. So, you didn't pretend to get shot and then lay on the ground 411 00:22:23,592 --> 00:22:25,094 -like a little baby? -Fuck, no. 412 00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:26,679 Fuck that! Come on, man. 413 00:22:26,762 --> 00:22:27,888 -I'll charge anytime. -Really? 414 00:22:27,972 --> 00:22:29,056 -I love war. -You love it? 415 00:22:29,139 --> 00:22:31,267 This... This to me, this is living. 416 00:22:31,767 --> 00:22:33,102 -This is living. -Right. 417 00:22:33,185 --> 00:22:34,895 -I feel alive. -You know what? This is perfect. 418 00:22:34,979 --> 00:22:36,480 You should volunteer to lead the next charge. 419 00:22:36,564 --> 00:22:38,357 No, I'm... I'm... I'm a charger, not a leader. 420 00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:39,859 -Hey, Sarge. -Hey, what the fuck? 421 00:22:39,942 --> 00:22:42,903 -David wants to lead the charge. -I never s-- No, I'm not a leader. 422 00:22:42,987 --> 00:22:44,280 -That's outstanding. -I'm a charger. 423 00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:46,282 -I'm not a leader. -I didn't think you had the balls. 424 00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:48,117 -I'm not-- I don't. I don't. -It appears that you do. 425 00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:50,035 No, no, but I don't. He's... He's just saying that. 426 00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:51,787 -Come on. Show us your balls. -I... I don't-- 427 00:22:51,871 --> 00:22:53,205 -Come on. -I-- What? 428 00:22:53,289 --> 00:22:54,874 -Are you crazy? -Come on. Come on now. 429 00:22:54,957 --> 00:22:56,458 I can't lead a charge. 430 00:22:56,542 --> 00:23:00,337 First of all, I have a limp and very undependable bowels. 431 00:23:01,964 --> 00:23:03,048 Easy. 432 00:23:04,008 --> 00:23:07,219 Private David, seems I underestimated you. 433 00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:09,346 Here you are. You're gonna lead us into battle. 434 00:23:09,430 --> 00:23:11,056 -What? Me? -That's right. 435 00:23:11,140 --> 00:23:13,225 I... I can't carry the flag. I'm too full from breakfast. 436 00:23:13,309 --> 00:23:14,351 -Nonsense. -What? 437 00:23:14,435 --> 00:23:16,186 You're the standard bearer for the regiment. 438 00:23:16,270 --> 00:23:17,730 -Carry the flag? -That's right. 439 00:23:17,813 --> 00:23:20,024 It's like carrying a banner that says, "Shoot me." 440 00:23:20,107 --> 00:23:21,233 -It's an honor. -What? It's an-- 441 00:23:21,317 --> 00:23:23,611 I... I don't need any honors. I'm a very modest person. 442 00:23:23,694 --> 00:23:25,654 -Take the flag. -No, you take it. 443 00:23:25,738 --> 00:23:27,114 -You take it. You! -No, no. 444 00:23:27,197 --> 00:23:29,116 -Sarge wants me to take a look. -All right. 445 00:23:29,199 --> 00:23:31,702 Jesus! Half a hard-on, bastard! You're gonna take this flag, 446 00:23:31,785 --> 00:23:34,246 or I'm gonna stuff this pole up your ass. 447 00:23:34,330 --> 00:23:35,497 Okay. 448 00:23:37,416 --> 00:23:38,584 They shot Wallace. 449 00:24:06,987 --> 00:24:08,530 In person. 450 00:24:22,294 --> 00:24:24,713 On December 1st, 1955, 451 00:24:24,797 --> 00:24:28,676 Rosa Parks was coming home by bus in Montgomery, Alabama, 452 00:24:28,759 --> 00:24:31,303 when she refused to give up her seat to a white man 453 00:24:31,387 --> 00:24:34,890 in violation of the city's "Negroes in back" policy, 454 00:24:34,974 --> 00:24:38,310 where the front of the bus was reserved for whites only. 455 00:24:38,394 --> 00:24:40,938 But Rosa would not move. 456 00:24:41,021 --> 00:24:42,481 She was arrested, 457 00:24:42,564 --> 00:24:44,358 and her actions inspired the Black community 458 00:24:44,441 --> 00:24:49,863 to organize the Montgomery Bus Boycott, led by a young Martin Luther King, Jr. 459 00:24:49,947 --> 00:24:51,740 It lasted more than a year 460 00:24:51,824 --> 00:24:56,829 until the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that bus segregation was unconstitutional. 461 00:24:56,912 --> 00:24:58,831 What Rosa Parks did on that bus 462 00:24:58,914 --> 00:25:02,501 made her a nationally recognized symbol of dignity and strength 463 00:25:02,584 --> 00:25:05,087 in the struggle to end racial segregation. 464 00:25:05,838 --> 00:25:09,591 But it's a little-known fact that she had tried this once before. 465 00:25:33,532 --> 00:25:34,742 Excuse me? 466 00:25:41,123 --> 00:25:42,124 Driver. 467 00:25:43,292 --> 00:25:45,544 -Get on to the back. -No. 468 00:25:46,462 --> 00:25:50,382 -I said to get on to the back of the bus. -And I said, "No." 469 00:25:51,133 --> 00:25:52,676 Well, I'm gonna have to have you arrested. 470 00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:54,845 -Well, go on and do so. -All right, then. 471 00:25:54,928 --> 00:25:58,307 Seriously, we're not doing this, okay? I'm very comfortable here. 472 00:25:58,390 --> 00:26:00,392 If she gets up, that means I have to get up. 473 00:26:00,476 --> 00:26:03,145 And then he's gonna slide in. He may even want the aisle seat. 474 00:26:03,228 --> 00:26:05,731 Maybe I'll get in a fight with him. It's ridiculous. 475 00:26:05,814 --> 00:26:07,858 She's sitting here. Get in the back. Come on. 476 00:26:07,941 --> 00:26:11,862 Move it out. You too. You, go ahead. Drive. Come on. 477 00:26:11,945 --> 00:26:13,280 Yeah, "tch" you. Go ahead. 478 00:26:20,370 --> 00:26:22,831 -That was very kind. -Needed to be said. 479 00:26:22,915 --> 00:26:24,374 Amen. 480 00:26:28,295 --> 00:26:29,421 Where you heading? 481 00:26:30,005 --> 00:26:32,424 -The market. -The market? 482 00:26:33,008 --> 00:26:36,053 Do a big shop. You got a big shop going? Is it a big shop? 483 00:26:36,136 --> 00:26:38,013 -No. -What are you gonna get? 484 00:26:38,639 --> 00:26:40,641 Vegetables, some peaches. 485 00:26:40,724 --> 00:26:42,184 What's your name? 486 00:26:42,684 --> 00:26:44,311 -Rosa. -I'm Murray. 487 00:26:44,394 --> 00:26:46,271 -Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you, Rosa. 488 00:26:46,355 --> 00:26:48,148 You know, I had an Aunt Rosa. 489 00:26:48,857 --> 00:26:52,611 Lovely woman. And I must say, she was quite voluptuous. 490 00:26:52,694 --> 00:26:55,239 She had a bawdy sense of humor. 491 00:26:55,322 --> 00:26:59,284 You could see how that could spark the imagination of a 12-year-old boy. 492 00:27:00,953 --> 00:27:02,162 About your own aunt? 493 00:27:03,372 --> 00:27:05,916 -Yeah. -Did she marry into the family? 494 00:27:05,999 --> 00:27:07,793 Oh, no. My mother's sister. 495 00:27:11,004 --> 00:27:13,757 Would you do me a favor? I just want to take this sweater off. 496 00:27:13,841 --> 00:27:14,925 Could you pull that sleeve? 497 00:27:17,177 --> 00:27:18,387 Sir, it's... 498 00:27:18,470 --> 00:27:20,139 -You-- -You're sweating a little bit. 499 00:27:20,222 --> 00:27:22,266 -Thank you. That's better. -All right. There you go. 500 00:27:23,100 --> 00:27:24,143 Thank you. 501 00:27:24,768 --> 00:27:27,646 Let me ask you this question. You're in somebody's house, 502 00:27:27,729 --> 00:27:29,606 and your back is really itching. 503 00:27:29,690 --> 00:27:31,984 If you saw a back scratcher, would you use the back scratcher, 504 00:27:32,067 --> 00:27:35,863 or would you rub it against a corner and try and, you know, get it... 505 00:27:35,946 --> 00:27:37,156 get it yourself? 506 00:27:38,115 --> 00:27:40,576 -No, I... I wouldn't use it. -Oh, yeah. 507 00:27:40,659 --> 00:27:42,452 That's like using someone's toothbrush. 508 00:27:42,536 --> 00:27:45,080 I disagree, Rosa. The back is not a mouth. 509 00:27:46,874 --> 00:27:48,959 How about this? If there wasn't a back scratcher, 510 00:27:49,042 --> 00:27:52,462 you know what I would do? I'd go into the kitchen, I'd get a fork, 511 00:27:52,588 --> 00:27:54,506 -I'd go into the bathroom... -No. 512 00:27:54,590 --> 00:27:55,757 ...scratch the back... 513 00:27:56,425 --> 00:27:58,051 -Jesus. -...wash the fork, return it, 514 00:27:58,135 --> 00:28:02,055 and, oh, boy, Rosa, there's no greater feeling in the world 515 00:28:02,139 --> 00:28:04,349 than scratching your back with a fork. 516 00:28:04,433 --> 00:28:07,603 -There you go. Problem solved. -You have anything to read? 517 00:28:07,686 --> 00:28:08,896 No. 518 00:28:08,979 --> 00:28:11,190 I guess I should bring stuff to read on the bus, right? 519 00:28:11,273 --> 00:28:13,275 Instead of just sitting here looking around like an idiot. 520 00:28:13,358 --> 00:28:15,444 -I like to read. -Do you live alone? 521 00:28:15,527 --> 00:28:17,321 You know, Rosa, I do. 522 00:28:18,488 --> 00:28:20,073 I have a lot of plants. 523 00:28:21,241 --> 00:28:23,619 Most of them are dead because I ignore them. 524 00:28:23,702 --> 00:28:25,996 And I have a parakeet who says my name. 525 00:28:26,079 --> 00:28:31,376 "Murray! Murray! Murray! Murray!" 526 00:28:32,169 --> 00:28:34,463 "Murray! Murray!" 527 00:28:35,380 --> 00:28:38,008 -"How's Murray?" -You like the sound of your own voice? 528 00:28:38,091 --> 00:28:39,343 Very much so. 529 00:28:40,844 --> 00:28:42,846 Hey, Rosa, who's Paul Bunyan? 530 00:28:42,930 --> 00:28:45,015 Do we like him or not? I know he was a big guy. 531 00:28:45,098 --> 00:28:47,226 People tell me you can't eat all parts of a lobster, 532 00:28:47,309 --> 00:28:50,646 -but I don't find that to be true. -What? 533 00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:53,398 You never see a pie cooling on a windowsill 534 00:28:53,482 --> 00:28:54,691 like you do in the movies. 535 00:28:54,775 --> 00:28:57,736 And believe me, I've looked in a lot of windows. 536 00:28:57,819 --> 00:29:00,614 Why are you looking through windows? For a pie? 537 00:29:00,697 --> 00:29:04,868 Did you see Dragnet last night? I knew who did it from the first minute. 538 00:29:13,543 --> 00:29:16,380 -Might I ask you a question? -Jesus. 539 00:29:16,463 --> 00:29:18,548 If you got robbed, 540 00:29:18,632 --> 00:29:22,636 would you prefer that it was a Black man or a white man who robbed you? 541 00:29:24,471 --> 00:29:27,182 Good question, right? Very interesting. Think about it. 542 00:29:27,808 --> 00:29:29,393 The sociological aspects of that. 543 00:29:29,476 --> 00:29:31,979 Why would I want to think about being robbed? 544 00:29:32,062 --> 00:29:35,023 -I know, but if you had to. Interesting-- -Why do you think about these things? 545 00:29:35,107 --> 00:29:37,234 -It just... It just occurred to me. -Are you a praying man? 546 00:29:37,317 --> 00:29:40,696 -I think it's a waste of time, really. -We should pray for your thoughts. 547 00:29:40,779 --> 00:29:42,281 -Pray for my thoughts? -Yes. 548 00:29:42,364 --> 00:29:46,827 -It might bring you some peace and quiet. -Do you sense I need peace? 549 00:29:46,910 --> 00:29:48,996 -I do. -What gives you that impression? 550 00:29:49,079 --> 00:29:50,622 Just about everything. 551 00:29:50,706 --> 00:29:52,040 -Okay. -Come on. 552 00:29:52,124 --> 00:29:54,001 -We gonna close our eyes? Come on now. -Close my eyes? 553 00:29:54,084 --> 00:29:56,044 -Okay. My eyes are closed. Okay, yeah. -Close your eyes. 554 00:29:56,128 --> 00:29:59,214 Oh, Father God, we pray for Mr. Murray today, Lord. 555 00:29:59,298 --> 00:30:01,383 Usher in your spirit. Cover him. 556 00:30:01,466 --> 00:30:03,552 Bring him peace of mind, God. 557 00:30:03,635 --> 00:30:05,721 -Yeah. -Silence his thoughts. 558 00:30:05,804 --> 00:30:09,224 And now, Murray, would you like to share anything with the Lord? 559 00:30:09,308 --> 00:30:11,977 -Oh, yeah, yeah. Sure. Yeah. -Yeah, you take over. 560 00:30:12,060 --> 00:30:13,937 Yeah, you know, Lord, you must be aware 561 00:30:14,021 --> 00:30:16,440 that I really haven't had sex in about eight years, so... 562 00:30:16,523 --> 00:30:18,650 -Oh, Jesus. -You know that. 563 00:30:18,734 --> 00:30:22,154 So maybe you could help me out a little bit, send somebody my way. 564 00:30:22,237 --> 00:30:25,115 You know, I'm not that particular. She could be a little overweight. 565 00:30:25,198 --> 00:30:27,617 Don't send me an elephant, of course, but, you know, 566 00:30:27,701 --> 00:30:29,619 reasonably overweight is fine. I don't care. 567 00:30:29,703 --> 00:30:31,872 Maybe even a redhead would be nice. 568 00:30:31,955 --> 00:30:34,916 You know, I... I don't-- Yeah, redhead. 569 00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:37,252 Hey, Rosa. Hey, where are you going? 570 00:30:37,336 --> 00:30:39,463 I'm going to the back of the bus, but you keep praying, Murray. 571 00:30:39,588 --> 00:30:40,756 Come on, y'all. Deal me in. 572 00:30:41,423 --> 00:30:45,302 Anyway, like I was saying, a redhead, that would be spectacular. 573 00:30:45,802 --> 00:30:48,305 Really. Not too many freckles, though.