1 00:00:56,974 --> 00:00:58,976 I was working in the engine room. 2 00:00:59,226 --> 00:01:00,602 We got the order, 3 00:01:00,686 --> 00:01:03,438 "All hands on deck, put your life preservers on." 4 00:01:04,523 --> 00:01:07,442 {\an8}The deck was full of male third-class passengers. 5 00:01:10,362 --> 00:01:12,364 The last boat was getting lowered. 6 00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:17,160 {\an8}About this time, I met all the engineers 7 00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:20,497 {\an8}as they came trooping up from below. 8 00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:25,502 Until that time, they had loyally stuck to their guns. 9 00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,595 {\an8}When the crew come up on deck, 10 00:01:34,678 --> 00:01:37,139 these guys who have worked so heroically 11 00:01:37,222 --> 00:01:39,349 to try to keep Titanic afloat, 12 00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:42,102 they expect that there will be a place 13 00:01:42,185 --> 00:01:44,229 for them in the lifeboats, 14 00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:46,857 and, of course, that is not the case. 15 00:01:50,527 --> 00:01:53,739 It was a bleak and hopeless spectacle that 16 00:01:53,864 --> 00:01:55,699 met their eyes. 17 00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:58,785 Empty fools hanging from every davit head. 18 00:02:01,038 --> 00:02:03,457 Not a hope for any of them. 19 00:02:11,757 --> 00:02:14,217 {\an8}Titanic has enough people on board that we're really 20 00:02:14,301 --> 00:02:19,056 {\an8}seeing the whole range of reactions to facing death, 21 00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:22,976 from resignation to fight and flight, 22 00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:26,188 to acting out of love and empathy to help other people. 23 00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:31,902 One fellow said, "Go to the first cabin bar room." 24 00:02:33,403 --> 00:02:36,865 There was a steward filling up tumblers on a tray. 25 00:02:38,116 --> 00:02:40,702 He said, "Go on, lads, drink up. 26 00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:44,665 She's goin' down." 27 00:02:48,669 --> 00:02:50,754 Some people prefer to stay in their cabin 28 00:02:50,837 --> 00:02:52,506 and let the waters rise up. 29 00:02:52,756 --> 00:02:55,092 Others go to the bar and just start drinking 30 00:02:55,425 --> 00:02:57,177 the place dry. 31 00:02:57,260 --> 00:02:59,054 Everyone has to choose to die in their own way, 32 00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:00,555 whatever that is. 33 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:12,609 Captain Smith and Thomas Andrews, 34 00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:16,363 the ship's designer, must have been in hell. 35 00:03:17,155 --> 00:03:20,200 This was their unsinkable ship. 36 00:03:22,953 --> 00:03:26,706 {\an8}Andrews was seen throwing steamer chairs into the water 37 00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:28,875 {\an8}with the idea of actually helping those who 38 00:03:28,959 --> 00:03:31,962 {\an8}got into the sea to have something to support them. 39 00:03:37,134 --> 00:03:39,344 During the Falklands War, I was a Captain. 40 00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:42,389 The ship that was bombed, which I had to abandon, 41 00:03:42,472 --> 00:03:44,516 and so I know the pressures he was under. 42 00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,602 And I personally think that he probably stayed 43 00:03:47,686 --> 00:03:50,939 on the bridge and waited to meet his fate. 44 00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:54,693 There's something of the stiff 45 00:03:54,818 --> 00:03:56,695 upper lip happening here, but inside, 46 00:03:56,820 --> 00:04:00,198 there must be inner turmoil because survival instinct 47 00:04:00,323 --> 00:04:02,159 is really powerful. 48 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:05,036 And the Captain is probably suppressing it 49 00:04:05,328 --> 00:04:06,496 as much as he can. 50 00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:08,999 The social codes of conduct, fighting against that very 51 00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:12,752 ancient part of the brain, the primitive part that 52 00:04:12,836 --> 00:04:14,796 just drives us forward biologically. 53 00:04:16,715 --> 00:04:19,259 I wanted to jump out and try to catch one of the, 54 00:04:19,342 --> 00:04:21,470 the empty lifeboat falls. 55 00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:26,516 I couldn't just jump. 56 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:29,186 {\an8}We might hit wreckage or a steamer chair and 57 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:30,854 {\an8}be knocked unconscious. 58 00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:32,939 Milton dissuaded me. 59 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:34,566 Milton we gotta do something! 60 00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:37,736 Milton Long, 29-year-old American law clerk, 61 00:04:37,861 --> 00:04:40,197 and Jack had struck up a conversation many hours 62 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:42,073 earlier in the dining saloon, 63 00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:44,367 and now they find themselves facing this 64 00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:46,495 life-or-death moment together. 65 00:04:48,747 --> 00:04:51,500 So many thoughts passed through my mind. 66 00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:54,920 I thought of all the good times I'd had. 67 00:04:57,172 --> 00:05:00,425 Sincerely pitied myself. 68 00:05:16,608 --> 00:05:18,026 Back in the wireless room, 69 00:05:18,109 --> 00:05:21,238 Jack Phillips has stuck to his post right to the end, 70 00:05:21,696 --> 00:05:24,741 even when Captain Smith said it's every man for himself, 71 00:05:25,408 --> 00:05:27,452 because he believes he's doing something useful. 72 00:05:28,745 --> 00:05:31,540 The sea has almost reached the wireless room, 73 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:34,084 and they have just minutes before 74 00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:36,336 it's filled with freezing water. 75 00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:41,049 I was back in my room getting Phillips' money for him, 76 00:05:41,424 --> 00:05:43,593 and as I looked out the door, 77 00:05:43,718 --> 00:05:49,099 I saw a stoker or somebody from below decks slipping 78 00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:51,268 the lifebelt off his back. 79 00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:53,520 {\an8}I remembered in a flash the way Phillips 80 00:05:53,603 --> 00:05:56,439 {\an8}had clung on, how I'd had to fix that lifebelt 81 00:05:56,523 --> 00:05:58,608 {\an8}in place because he was too busy to do it. 82 00:06:00,735 --> 00:06:02,362 And I felt a passion not to let that man die 83 00:06:02,445 --> 00:06:04,114 a decent sailor's death. 84 00:06:10,954 --> 00:06:13,540 I hope I finished him, I don't know. 85 00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:16,710 We left him on the floor of the wireless cabin. 86 00:06:17,961 --> 00:06:19,796 He wasn't moving. 87 00:06:25,677 --> 00:06:28,471 I climbed on top of the officer's quarters, 88 00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:32,183 and I saw the last of Phillips. 89 00:06:32,475 --> 00:06:33,435 He doesn't say goodbye. 90 00:06:33,518 --> 00:06:34,644 He doesn't give any explanation. 91 00:06:34,769 --> 00:06:37,022 There's no clap on the back to his junior. 92 00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:38,148 He's done everything. 93 00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:39,357 There is nothing more to do. 94 00:06:39,482 --> 00:06:41,735 The man is ready to die. 95 00:06:55,290 --> 00:06:56,499 {\an8}At this stage, all the lifeboats 96 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,001 {\an8}on the boat deck have been launched, and, 97 00:06:58,126 --> 00:06:59,961 {\an8}of course, there's, there's a panic that there 98 00:07:00,045 --> 00:07:03,715 {\an8}are no lifeboats left, but there is actually two 99 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:06,843 more stashed away on the roof of the officer's quarters, 100 00:07:07,510 --> 00:07:09,471 collapsible A and B. 101 00:07:20,357 --> 00:07:23,234 I saw the boat and the men trying to push it off. 102 00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:25,362 They couldn't do it. 103 00:07:26,071 --> 00:07:28,448 I went up to them, lending a hand. 104 00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:36,706 Now the crew are trying to launch them 105 00:07:36,831 --> 00:07:40,210 in increasingly difficult and desperate conditions. 106 00:07:44,047 --> 00:07:46,174 Just then, the ship took a slight 107 00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:47,967 but definite plunge. 108 00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:53,181 The sea came rolling up in a wave. 109 00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:57,977 And a large wave washes collapsible A and B overboard. 110 00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:01,439 You've just been given that hope, 111 00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:02,732 but in amongst the chaos, 112 00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:05,735 the lifeboats are stolen from you by the elements, 113 00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:08,488 and that is just devastating. 114 00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:12,784 The big wave carried the boat off. 115 00:08:13,368 --> 00:08:17,163 I had hold of an oar lock and went off with it. 116 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,212 Water was washing right across the deck, 117 00:08:25,338 --> 00:08:28,133 {\an8}and we were in water right to our hips. 118 00:08:29,426 --> 00:08:32,554 Another lurch threw myself off and away from 119 00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:34,180 the ship into the water. 120 00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:37,726 No! No! No! 121 00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:41,730 I was underwater and knew I had to fight for it. 122 00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:47,527 The temperature in the water is minus two degrees, 123 00:08:48,111 --> 00:08:50,155 so as soon as that cold water hits the body, 124 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:52,490 there's a shock reaction, 125 00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:55,201 and the mind is reacting in a state of panic. 126 00:08:58,121 --> 00:09:01,916 Everything I touched seemed to be women's hair. 127 00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:09,174 Children crying, women screaming. 128 00:09:11,342 --> 00:09:13,178 Their hair in my face. 129 00:09:17,682 --> 00:09:20,060 If only I could forget those hands and faces 130 00:09:20,143 --> 00:09:21,144 that I touched. 131 00:09:32,864 --> 00:09:35,742 The ship was sinking on its head very quickly. 132 00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:38,661 The water was right up to the bridge. 133 00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:42,999 The crowd moved with it, pushing towards the stern. 134 00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:47,670 A sight that doesn't bear dwelling on. 135 00:09:49,881 --> 00:09:53,176 To stand there above the wheelhouse watching the 136 00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:56,304 frantic struggles to climb up the sloping deck, 137 00:09:57,263 --> 00:10:00,517 unable to even hold out a helping hand. 138 00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:08,066 I knew what the futility of following that instinct 139 00:10:08,191 --> 00:10:10,068 for self-preservation. 140 00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:14,239 It would only be postponing the plunge 141 00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:16,324 and prolonging the agony. 142 00:10:19,911 --> 00:10:22,956 Turning to the bridge, I took a header. 143 00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:32,382 Striking water was like a thousand knives being 144 00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:34,342 driven into one's body. 145 00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:36,386 For a few moments, 146 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:38,930 I completely lost grip of myself. 147 00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:47,897 We were at the starboard rail to keep away from the crowd. 148 00:10:49,524 --> 00:10:52,819 The ship began to shoot down fast, 149 00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:55,572 the water rushing up towards us. 150 00:10:56,114 --> 00:10:57,740 We had no time to think, 151 00:10:57,824 --> 00:10:59,909 only to act. 152 00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:07,041 The people who choose to jump are ultimately the 153 00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:11,171 people who take some form of control in a situation 154 00:11:11,254 --> 00:11:13,256 where you are powerless. 155 00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:34,694 We were about five minutes away from the ship, 156 00:11:36,321 --> 00:11:39,199 {\an8}but we could still see it as the lights stayed on. 157 00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:45,371 The ship stood almost on its nose, 158 00:11:45,455 --> 00:11:47,332 slowly sinking. 159 00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:52,462 And the people on the Titanic were 160 00:11:52,545 --> 00:11:55,048 yelling and crying. 161 00:11:57,050 --> 00:12:00,303 I could see some of them as they jumped into the water. 162 00:12:15,777 --> 00:12:19,322 I found myself drawn against the grating 163 00:12:19,405 --> 00:12:21,783 covering a ventilator. 164 00:12:23,826 --> 00:12:26,496 The pressure of the water glued me there. 165 00:12:27,664 --> 00:12:30,667 The shaft led to a stokehold, 166 00:12:31,334 --> 00:12:33,461 a sheer drop of 100 feet right 167 00:12:33,544 --> 00:12:35,630 to the bottom of the ship. 168 00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:39,050 I struggled and kicked for all I was worth. 169 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:43,012 Every instinct expecting the wire to go, 170 00:12:45,223 --> 00:12:47,517 to find myself shot down into the bowels of the ship. 171 00:12:54,691 --> 00:12:56,192 The shock of the water took the breath 172 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:57,777 from my lungs. 173 00:12:58,653 --> 00:13:01,990 Down and down I went, spinning in all directions. 174 00:13:03,366 --> 00:13:05,368 The cold was terrific. 175 00:13:06,869 --> 00:13:09,289 Most people think of drowning in a circumstance 176 00:13:09,372 --> 00:13:11,708 like this, it is that ultimately your body runs 177 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,334 out of energy, but actually, 178 00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:16,254 you can drown as soon as you first hit freezing water. 179 00:13:17,714 --> 00:13:19,882 Some may have cardiac arrest almost 180 00:13:20,008 --> 00:13:22,302 immediately because of the shock. 181 00:13:25,221 --> 00:13:27,307 I was still fighting when a blast of 182 00:13:27,390 --> 00:13:30,768 hot air came up the shaft and blew me right away 183 00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:33,313 from the airshaft and up to the surface. 184 00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:45,533 Finally, I came up, my lungs bursting. 185 00:13:48,244 --> 00:13:50,413 The ship was in front of me. 186 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:53,875 Suddenly, the second funnel seemed to be lifted off. 187 00:13:57,795 --> 00:13:59,839 The funnel started to fall right 188 00:13:59,922 --> 00:14:03,801 amongst the struggling mass of humanity already 189 00:14:03,926 --> 00:14:05,386 in the water. 190 00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:10,683 It missed me by only 20 to 30 feet. 191 00:14:11,017 --> 00:14:13,102 The suction of it drew me down. 192 00:14:15,271 --> 00:14:18,816 Those poor people were sucked down in those 193 00:14:18,941 --> 00:14:24,072 funnels like flies. 194 00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:28,785 As I came to the surface, 195 00:14:28,910 --> 00:14:30,953 my hand came against something, 196 00:14:31,788 --> 00:14:33,372 one of the collapsible lifeboats. 197 00:14:33,456 --> 00:14:36,125 It was floating in the water, bottom side up. 198 00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:40,713 About four or five men clinging onto her, 199 00:14:41,714 --> 00:14:44,050 so I asked them to give me a hand up, which they did. 200 00:14:46,094 --> 00:14:49,305 Sitting on my haunches, holding on for dear life, 201 00:14:50,348 --> 00:14:52,308 it seemed as though hours had passed since I left the ship. 202 00:14:56,354 --> 00:14:58,815 People like Jack and Officer Lightoller 203 00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:01,984 are swarming onto collapsible B upside down, 204 00:15:02,068 --> 00:15:05,113 using it like a raft in the freezing water just 205 00:15:05,196 --> 00:15:07,949 as a way of trying to survive. 206 00:15:21,754 --> 00:15:25,174 {\an8}The end was very close. 207 00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:30,096 Something in the bowels of the Titanic exploded, 208 00:15:30,346 --> 00:15:32,682 and sparks shot up to the sky. 209 00:15:34,016 --> 00:15:36,185 Two other explosions followed, 210 00:15:36,561 --> 00:15:39,522 dull and heavy as if below the surface. 211 00:15:41,691 --> 00:15:44,193 The huge weight of seawater in the bows and 212 00:15:44,318 --> 00:15:47,530 in the stern meant that the two things were unable 213 00:15:47,655 --> 00:15:49,824 to remain as one part. 214 00:15:50,533 --> 00:15:53,411 The whole superstructure of the ship seemed to split. 215 00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:58,416 The lights suddenly go out, and then darkness falls. 216 00:16:10,553 --> 00:16:13,222 The Titanic broke in two before my eyes. 217 00:16:14,265 --> 00:16:17,602 The fore part wallowed over and disappeared instantly. 218 00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:25,610 {\an8}The ship seemed to right herself like a hurt animal 219 00:16:25,860 --> 00:16:27,445 {\an8}with a broken back. 220 00:16:30,907 --> 00:16:33,993 For a strange, hallucinatory moment, 221 00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:36,871 it looks as though everything is going to be fine 222 00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:40,666 because the weird, wonky, distorted angles 223 00:16:40,750 --> 00:16:44,670 of the great ship start to settle. 224 00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:48,090 There's people that think that some sort of safety 225 00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:50,259 feature has kicked in, you know, at least this 226 00:16:50,343 --> 00:16:52,887 half of the ship is going to somehow survive, 227 00:16:53,221 --> 00:16:55,223 and those on board are going to be spared, 228 00:16:55,306 --> 00:16:57,016 but ultimately that is short-lived. 229 00:17:00,519 --> 00:17:03,606 {\an8}I saw the Titanic go up in the air, 230 00:17:03,731 --> 00:17:05,274 {\an8}ever so big. 231 00:17:07,443 --> 00:17:10,988 Huge ship reared herself on end. 232 00:17:11,739 --> 00:17:14,659 Rudder and propeller clear of the water until 233 00:17:14,784 --> 00:17:18,746 at least she assumed a perpendicular position. 234 00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:26,212 We saw groups of the 1,500 people still aboard 235 00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:28,631 clinging like swarming bees. 236 00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:36,138 The contents of the Titanic is now falling through it, 237 00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:38,266 and tragically, people as well. 238 00:17:39,350 --> 00:17:42,144 {\an8}I think it was only at that moment that many of 239 00:17:42,270 --> 00:17:46,065 {\an8}those poor souls onboard realized their fate. 240 00:17:48,025 --> 00:17:50,152 If we're gonna die, I said, 241 00:17:50,278 --> 00:17:52,572 it would be best to die gripping something. 242 00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:56,325 We gripped the rail. 243 00:18:08,004 --> 00:18:10,756 A sharp exclamation from my husband, 244 00:18:12,300 --> 00:18:15,761 "My God, she is going now." 245 00:18:17,972 --> 00:18:22,226 {\an8}The steamer, without a sound 246 00:18:22,351 --> 00:18:26,147 {\an8}except for the shrieks of the people still onboard, 247 00:18:28,107 --> 00:18:30,735 stood right on end. 248 00:18:33,738 --> 00:18:36,407 It stood there several moments and slipped 249 00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:40,328 straight down into the water. 250 00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,541 As easily as a pebble in a pond. 251 00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:51,464 Our proud ship. 252 00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:55,301 Our beautiful Titanic . 253 00:19:23,746 --> 00:19:25,373 Everyone round me on the upturned boat 254 00:19:25,456 --> 00:19:29,460 breathed the two words, "She's gone." 255 00:19:39,261 --> 00:19:41,389 I did not wish to see her go down. 256 00:19:43,391 --> 00:19:45,768 {\an8}I'm glad that I did not. 257 00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:49,772 My back was turned to her. 258 00:19:50,439 --> 00:19:52,191 We were pulling away. 259 00:19:54,110 --> 00:19:55,403 This is his ship. 260 00:19:55,486 --> 00:19:59,031 This is his company, and there is intense 261 00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:01,867 professional and personal shame here. 262 00:20:02,827 --> 00:20:06,247 I think that was just too overwhelming for him 263 00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:08,249 to be able to look. 264 00:20:11,794 --> 00:20:14,380 Probably a minute passed with almost 265 00:20:14,463 --> 00:20:16,132 dead silence and quiet. 266 00:20:21,429 --> 00:20:24,265 Then an unforgettable cry went up 267 00:20:24,348 --> 00:20:28,310 from 1,500 despairing throats. 268 00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:35,317 A bedlam of shrieks and cries. 269 00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:41,490 A nightmare of both sight and sound. 270 00:20:44,910 --> 00:20:48,330 Hearing desperate disembodied voices in 271 00:20:48,414 --> 00:20:49,874 the darkness of the ocean... 272 00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:58,466 A cacophony of tears and shouts and despair 273 00:20:58,549 --> 00:21:01,510 is, is almost like a soundscape of hell. 274 00:21:02,011 --> 00:21:04,555 Potentially, it's your husband, your brother, 275 00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:07,349 your father, your loved ones' voices. 276 00:21:07,933 --> 00:21:09,852 I don't know how you recover from that. 277 00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:16,025 I have never heard such screams 278 00:21:19,528 --> 00:21:24,617 from the hundreds of people floating about us. 279 00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:42,676 It was a horrible row. 280 00:21:47,056 --> 00:21:48,474 Mother! 281 00:21:48,557 --> 00:21:49,892 One young man near me shouted... 282 00:21:49,975 --> 00:21:52,102 Mother! Mother! 283 00:21:52,228 --> 00:21:53,145 "Mother." 284 00:21:53,229 --> 00:21:56,315 Mother! Mother! 285 00:21:56,398 --> 00:22:00,694 A man alongside me crushed me round the neck. 286 00:22:04,198 --> 00:22:06,492 I choked him off. 287 00:22:09,537 --> 00:22:12,581 Nobody knows how they'll react in that circumstance. 288 00:22:12,706 --> 00:22:15,459 You're surrounded by others in a panic with you. 289 00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:18,420 You begin to lose the function of your arms and 290 00:22:18,546 --> 00:22:20,256 the function of your legs, 291 00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:21,882 the thing that you need to keep afloat, 292 00:22:21,966 --> 00:22:24,260 and that can happen extremely quickly because 293 00:22:24,385 --> 00:22:27,096 that body's reaction to keep your vital 294 00:22:27,221 --> 00:22:29,515 organs warm is so powerful. 295 00:22:33,561 --> 00:22:36,146 The people in the lifeboats are sitting 296 00:22:36,272 --> 00:22:39,066 and listening to others die, 297 00:22:39,900 --> 00:22:43,112 and everyone's response to that trauma situation 298 00:22:43,195 --> 00:22:45,072 will be different. 299 00:22:47,950 --> 00:22:50,744 We chatted of little unimportant things, 300 00:22:50,828 --> 00:22:52,454 as people do when they've been through 301 00:22:52,580 --> 00:22:54,748 great mental strain. 302 00:22:56,125 --> 00:22:58,460 Try to make feeble jokes. 303 00:22:59,503 --> 00:23:03,215 I remember I teased Ms. Fragatelli, 304 00:23:03,299 --> 00:23:04,925 "Just fancy, 305 00:23:05,009 --> 00:23:07,970 you left your beautiful nightdress behind you." 306 00:23:11,015 --> 00:23:12,975 And we all laughed. 307 00:23:15,644 --> 00:23:18,606 But in our hearts, we felt very far from laughter. 308 00:23:19,773 --> 00:23:22,526 Lucy's comments sound tone deaf to us, 309 00:23:23,068 --> 00:23:25,321 but I think they're a trauma response. 310 00:23:25,988 --> 00:23:31,493 It is far easier to comprehend the loss of 311 00:23:31,577 --> 00:23:33,662 a beautiful piece of clothing. 312 00:23:33,787 --> 00:23:37,541 She's a fashion designer, of course, than it is to 313 00:23:37,666 --> 00:23:42,922 wrap their heads around the extraordinary horror of 314 00:23:43,005 --> 00:23:45,966 the loss of human life that they're seeing before them. 315 00:23:47,968 --> 00:23:53,390 For those in the water, a fatal countdown has begun. 316 00:23:53,766 --> 00:23:56,226 Once severe hypothermia sets in, 317 00:23:56,352 --> 00:24:00,522 you've got about 15 minutes until you'll become unconscious. 318 00:24:02,024 --> 00:24:03,901 A large number of people gave up the 319 00:24:04,026 --> 00:24:07,237 struggle and were content to die, 320 00:24:07,363 --> 00:24:10,449 for the water was so cold. 321 00:24:13,077 --> 00:24:15,412 When the darkness starts to creep in on you, 322 00:24:15,537 --> 00:24:16,789 that's when you have to have a real word with 323 00:24:16,872 --> 00:24:19,041 yourself and remind yourself that you still 324 00:24:19,124 --> 00:24:20,876 have some fight in you. 325 00:24:27,549 --> 00:24:30,052 I swam as though I was in a race. 326 00:24:30,552 --> 00:24:33,722 I got myself away from the crowd. 327 00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:36,642 Behind me, there was the horrible volume 328 00:24:36,725 --> 00:24:38,477 of groans which... 329 00:24:42,690 --> 00:24:44,775 I can hear them now. 330 00:24:46,610 --> 00:24:48,904 It was a terrible sight all around. 331 00:24:50,239 --> 00:24:52,241 Men swimming and sinking. 332 00:24:52,449 --> 00:24:53,784 I saw a boat of some kind. 333 00:24:53,909 --> 00:24:56,912 And I put all my strength into an effort to swim to it. 334 00:24:58,122 --> 00:24:59,790 It was hard work. 335 00:25:00,916 --> 00:25:05,754 I was all done when a hand reached from the 336 00:25:05,879 --> 00:25:08,048 boat and pulled me aboard. 337 00:25:09,341 --> 00:25:10,759 Come on, that's it. 338 00:25:10,843 --> 00:25:13,012 Collapsible B that had been stored on the roof of 339 00:25:13,095 --> 00:25:15,347 the officers' quarters, was washed off deck and 340 00:25:15,431 --> 00:25:20,602 is now the last hope of the men who jump 341 00:25:20,728 --> 00:25:22,563 from the Titanic . 342 00:25:22,813 --> 00:25:25,607 Among the 30 men on Collapsible B, 343 00:25:25,691 --> 00:25:29,653 we have Harold Bride, Jack Thayer, Eugene Daly, 344 00:25:30,237 --> 00:25:31,780 and Charles Lightoller. 345 00:25:32,781 --> 00:25:35,993 Others came near, nobody gave them a hand. 346 00:25:36,118 --> 00:25:38,704 The bottom-up boat already had more men than it would 347 00:25:38,787 --> 00:25:40,789 hold and was sinking. 348 00:25:42,166 --> 00:25:46,128 We were very low in the water, standing, sitting, 349 00:25:46,253 --> 00:25:48,630 kneeling, lying in all conceivable positions. 350 00:25:50,299 --> 00:25:53,135 People came up beside us and begged us to get 351 00:25:53,260 --> 00:25:55,262 on this upturned boat. 352 00:25:58,140 --> 00:26:01,935 Saving ourselves, we were obliged to push them off. 353 00:26:05,439 --> 00:26:07,024 One man was alongside us 354 00:26:07,149 --> 00:26:09,693 and asked if he could get up on top of it. 355 00:26:11,779 --> 00:26:14,156 We told him that if he did, we would all go down. 356 00:26:17,159 --> 00:26:20,746 His reply was, "God bless you, goodbye." 357 00:26:24,249 --> 00:26:27,503 To look another human being in the eye and say to them, 358 00:26:27,586 --> 00:26:30,005 "You're going to have to perish," 359 00:26:30,130 --> 00:26:32,424 like that, is an impossible thing not just 360 00:26:32,508 --> 00:26:35,177 to live through in the moment but then to have to live with. 361 00:26:40,182 --> 00:26:43,185 There are 1,500 people in ice cold water 362 00:26:43,268 --> 00:26:46,271 in the Atlantic, and there are some lifeboats 363 00:26:46,355 --> 00:26:48,482 that are full to capacity, 364 00:26:48,690 --> 00:26:50,526 and there's nothing they can do. 365 00:26:50,859 --> 00:26:53,028 But there are many others that are even 366 00:26:53,153 --> 00:26:55,072 less than half full. 367 00:26:56,073 --> 00:26:59,118 Because the 18 lifeboats are not at capacity, 368 00:26:59,201 --> 00:27:02,121 there's still space for over 400 people. 369 00:27:03,163 --> 00:27:05,791 It could save them from almost certain death. 370 00:27:08,794 --> 00:27:11,547 Within the lifeboats, there's an intense dilemma. 371 00:27:11,797 --> 00:27:13,757 Do they go back and save people, 372 00:27:13,882 --> 00:27:16,176 or do they stay at a safe distance so that they don't 373 00:27:16,260 --> 00:27:19,388 get overcrowded and everyone in that lifeboat 374 00:27:19,471 --> 00:27:21,306 end up in the water? 375 00:27:23,183 --> 00:27:26,103 Three times an officer ordered his men to turn about, 376 00:27:27,771 --> 00:27:29,648 {\an8}but each time they were prevented from 377 00:27:29,731 --> 00:27:32,025 {\an8}doing so by some of the passengers. 378 00:27:34,361 --> 00:27:37,030 They grasped the oars so that the seamen were 379 00:27:37,114 --> 00:27:40,409 forced to give up turning back to rescue 380 00:27:40,534 --> 00:27:42,327 any of the unfortunates. 381 00:27:46,874 --> 00:27:49,710 In the Duff-Gordon boat, one of the crew members says, 382 00:27:49,793 --> 00:27:51,378 "It's up to us to go back and see if we 383 00:27:51,461 --> 00:27:53,130 can pick anyone up." 384 00:27:54,256 --> 00:27:56,300 The Duff-Gordons object. 385 00:27:56,425 --> 00:27:57,634 They say they'll be swamped, 386 00:27:57,759 --> 00:28:00,387 and they persuade the crew not to go back. 387 00:28:01,722 --> 00:28:04,308 I find it chilling that the Duff-Gordons are just 388 00:28:04,433 --> 00:28:07,895 openly hostile to letting anyone in their lifeboat. 389 00:28:07,978 --> 00:28:11,481 All along, they have been given privileges that 390 00:28:11,607 --> 00:28:13,442 other people haven't been given, 391 00:28:13,567 --> 00:28:18,447 and to die slowly in ice-cold water within earshot 392 00:28:18,572 --> 00:28:20,616 of people who might save your life, 393 00:28:20,741 --> 00:28:23,035 I think there's a particular cruelty to that. 394 00:28:26,788 --> 00:28:30,000 Men and women were going to their death 395 00:28:30,125 --> 00:28:32,252 beneath the icy waters of the Atlantic, 396 00:28:32,336 --> 00:28:37,966 but I noticed in a hazy, detached sort of way. 397 00:28:39,259 --> 00:28:42,471 I'd gone through too much in those hours to think clearly. 398 00:28:45,933 --> 00:28:47,643 She's so traumatized she's not 399 00:28:47,768 --> 00:28:51,313 able to get out of her own experience enough 400 00:28:51,396 --> 00:28:54,483 to engage with what those people in the water 401 00:28:54,608 --> 00:28:56,109 are going through at that time. 402 00:29:01,782 --> 00:29:05,160 Partially filled lifeboats standing by 403 00:29:05,243 --> 00:29:08,205 only a few hundred yards away never came back. 404 00:29:11,041 --> 00:29:15,879 Why on earth they did not come back is a mystery. 405 00:29:16,004 --> 00:29:19,007 How could any human being fail to heed those cries? 406 00:29:24,221 --> 00:29:26,181 I think it is extremely unfortunate the 407 00:29:26,264 --> 00:29:28,934 lifeboats didn't go ahead and start to rescue people. 408 00:29:29,017 --> 00:29:31,520 They were willing to sit with people screaming 409 00:29:31,645 --> 00:29:32,896 and dying in the water, 410 00:29:33,021 --> 00:29:34,898 and I find that quite surprising. 411 00:29:38,485 --> 00:29:42,197 I became so numb I could hardly swim. 412 00:29:44,491 --> 00:29:46,827 My head was so queer. 413 00:29:52,082 --> 00:29:55,043 But when I was almost at my last gasp, I shouted, 414 00:29:55,127 --> 00:30:01,341 "Boats ahoy" on the off chance that one might be near. 415 00:30:04,720 --> 00:30:09,766 I had room for a dozen more people in my boat, 416 00:30:09,891 --> 00:30:11,893 {\an8}but it was dark. 417 00:30:15,063 --> 00:30:17,024 {\an8}We didn't pick up any swimmers. 418 00:30:20,610 --> 00:30:22,696 We all like to think that we'd be the noble one that 419 00:30:22,779 --> 00:30:24,906 does the right thing, 420 00:30:25,032 --> 00:30:27,075 but that's not how survival works. 421 00:30:28,744 --> 00:30:30,203 Ultimately, as human beings, 422 00:30:30,287 --> 00:30:32,247 we are animals who have survived. 423 00:30:32,330 --> 00:30:34,082 That's how we've evolved to be what we are. 424 00:30:34,166 --> 00:30:36,460 So survival instinct is absolutely within our DNA. 425 00:30:37,085 --> 00:30:40,005 And so you have no idea what you are capable of 426 00:30:40,088 --> 00:30:42,215 until you are pushed in an extreme. 427 00:30:43,550 --> 00:30:46,553 Disasters reveal an aspect of your personality 428 00:30:46,636 --> 00:30:47,929 that you might not know is there, 429 00:30:48,055 --> 00:30:50,098 and you might not like being there, 430 00:30:50,223 --> 00:30:51,600 to, to save your own life, 431 00:30:51,725 --> 00:30:53,268 to let hundreds of people die? 432 00:30:53,351 --> 00:30:54,478 I think that's, that's something that would 433 00:30:54,603 --> 00:30:57,230 weigh heavily on you for the rest of your life. 434 00:31:06,198 --> 00:31:08,867 There's a cluster of lifeboats closer 435 00:31:08,950 --> 00:31:10,952 to where the Titanic went down, 436 00:31:11,036 --> 00:31:13,622 including Lifeboats 14 and 4, 437 00:31:14,623 --> 00:31:16,166 and this is a kind of case of right place, 438 00:31:16,291 --> 00:31:18,585 right time for some people in the water. 439 00:31:20,128 --> 00:31:22,589 Fortunately, my shout was heard. 440 00:31:23,715 --> 00:31:25,759 Over here! 441 00:31:25,842 --> 00:31:28,303 I was hauled into Lifeboat No. 4. 442 00:31:29,554 --> 00:31:33,600 About seven people are rescued because of that boat, 443 00:31:34,059 --> 00:31:36,478 including Thomas Dillon. 444 00:31:37,062 --> 00:31:40,232 I think I'd been 20 minutes in the water. 445 00:31:43,819 --> 00:31:48,657 I would rather die 100 times than go through 446 00:31:48,782 --> 00:31:50,659 such an experience again. 447 00:32:02,671 --> 00:32:05,632 Mr. Lowe went in search of other lifeboats. 448 00:32:06,633 --> 00:32:11,054 He found 4 or 5 and took command of the little fleet. 449 00:32:11,471 --> 00:32:13,890 The whole of you are under my orders. 450 00:32:14,349 --> 00:32:16,226 Lifeboat 14 is very full, 451 00:32:16,351 --> 00:32:18,603 but Lowe realizes that actually, 452 00:32:18,687 --> 00:32:20,605 if this group works together, 453 00:32:20,689 --> 00:32:24,025 they have a chance of being able to launch a rescue mission. 454 00:32:25,193 --> 00:32:27,946 They were able to redistribute those passengers, 455 00:32:28,029 --> 00:32:30,532 and they actually free up an entire lifeboat, 456 00:32:31,283 --> 00:32:34,286 which allows them to go in and search for survivors. 457 00:32:34,703 --> 00:32:36,705 Row. 458 00:32:36,913 --> 00:32:39,291 {\an8}I went with just the boat's crew, 459 00:32:39,374 --> 00:32:42,127 {\an8}no passengers. 460 00:32:42,210 --> 00:32:45,380 Of course, I had to wait for the yells and 461 00:32:45,505 --> 00:32:48,216 shrieks to subside, 462 00:32:48,717 --> 00:32:50,719 for the people to thin out. 463 00:32:52,637 --> 00:32:57,058 Officer Lowe is very aware of the potential risks. 464 00:32:57,184 --> 00:32:58,852 You can be capsized when trying to pull 465 00:32:58,935 --> 00:33:00,896 survivors into the vessel. 466 00:33:01,313 --> 00:33:03,315 The vessel can be swamped, 467 00:33:03,523 --> 00:33:05,483 but they choose to go back. 468 00:33:05,567 --> 00:33:07,736 They're not just survivors in this moment; 469 00:33:07,861 --> 00:33:09,404 they continue to be crewmen. 470 00:33:09,487 --> 00:33:10,655 Your training just kicks in, 471 00:33:10,739 --> 00:33:12,240 and you have a responsibility 472 00:33:12,365 --> 00:33:15,035 to those around you, even before yourself. 473 00:33:16,077 --> 00:33:18,038 I searched the wreck thoroughly and 474 00:33:18,121 --> 00:33:20,123 found four persons. 475 00:33:20,457 --> 00:33:23,752 One was a Mr. Hoyt from New York. 476 00:33:27,339 --> 00:33:29,382 He was bleeding from the mouth. 477 00:33:30,342 --> 00:33:32,093 I loosened his shirt so as to give him every 478 00:33:32,177 --> 00:33:37,224 chance to breathe, but unfortunately, he died. 479 00:33:38,391 --> 00:33:40,769 I suppose he was too far gone when we picked him up. 480 00:33:49,361 --> 00:33:51,196 Most of those that jumped in the sea died within 481 00:33:51,279 --> 00:33:53,323 a quarter of an hour. 482 00:33:54,032 --> 00:33:56,159 The awful moaning ceased after that. 483 00:33:58,203 --> 00:34:02,874 {\an8}We saw nothing but ice and dead bodies. 484 00:34:02,958 --> 00:34:06,795 {\an8}My God! 485 00:34:06,920 --> 00:34:08,171 {\an8}My... 486 00:34:08,296 --> 00:34:10,006 I remember the very last cry, 487 00:34:10,131 --> 00:34:13,009 this man's voice calling loudly, 488 00:34:13,134 --> 00:34:18,807 "My God, my God." 489 00:34:23,103 --> 00:34:25,689 My God. 490 00:34:25,814 --> 00:34:28,316 I think it would have been very haunting to slowly 491 00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:30,527 hear fewer and fewer voices, 492 00:34:30,652 --> 00:34:33,405 and that's one of the most traumatic memories 493 00:34:33,488 --> 00:34:36,283 that people had is the sound of those screams. 494 00:34:47,544 --> 00:34:50,755 The air was leaking from under the boat, 495 00:34:51,673 --> 00:34:54,217 lowering us further and further into the icy water. 496 00:34:56,344 --> 00:34:58,388 Soaking wet, freezing. 497 00:34:58,513 --> 00:35:01,308 The pack of huddled men on Collapsible B 498 00:35:01,391 --> 00:35:04,269 have survived so many odds. 499 00:35:04,894 --> 00:35:07,397 But that's all for nothing if nobody comes to your rescue, 500 00:35:08,106 --> 00:35:09,816 and they don't know if that's coming. 501 00:35:10,775 --> 00:35:15,322 Some lost consciousness and slipped overboard. 502 00:35:16,197 --> 00:35:17,407 The problem with trying to stay on 503 00:35:17,532 --> 00:35:19,826 an upside-down boat, which they're now using as a raft, 504 00:35:19,909 --> 00:35:21,328 is that it's not stable. 505 00:35:21,411 --> 00:35:25,165 This is a balancing act, literally to save your life. 506 00:35:27,167 --> 00:35:28,877 Their class differences cease 507 00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:31,046 to be important. 508 00:35:31,129 --> 00:35:32,255 We've got men from first class, 509 00:35:32,380 --> 00:35:34,007 men from third, crew members 510 00:35:34,090 --> 00:35:36,301 united by this will to survive. 511 00:35:37,802 --> 00:35:40,388 Harold Bride helped keep our hopes up. 512 00:35:41,556 --> 00:35:44,059 He said time and time again, 513 00:35:44,184 --> 00:35:46,269 " The Carpathia is coming as fast as she can, 514 00:35:46,728 --> 00:35:48,605 The Carpathia is coming as fast as she can." 515 00:35:53,860 --> 00:35:56,363 Lightoller found his whistle. 516 00:35:59,282 --> 00:36:02,869 After desperate calling, we got the attention of 517 00:36:02,952 --> 00:36:04,871 the other lifeboats. 518 00:36:06,373 --> 00:36:08,833 Two of the boats realized the position 519 00:36:08,917 --> 00:36:11,169 we were in and drew toward us. 520 00:36:14,172 --> 00:36:16,758 They had a right-side-up boat, 521 00:36:18,093 --> 00:36:19,761 and it was full to its capacity. 522 00:36:22,806 --> 00:36:25,433 Yet they came to us and loaded us all into it. 523 00:36:39,364 --> 00:36:41,783 Officer Boxhall took some green flares 524 00:36:41,908 --> 00:36:45,370 from the bridge, and now he's lighting them, 525 00:36:45,453 --> 00:36:48,123 hoping that he will attract the attention of 526 00:36:48,248 --> 00:36:50,792 the approaching rescue vessel. 527 00:37:01,803 --> 00:37:05,265 About this time, the edge of the sun 528 00:37:05,348 --> 00:37:07,851 came above the horizon. 529 00:37:11,479 --> 00:37:14,315 To feel that glowing warmth, 530 00:37:14,441 --> 00:37:17,277 which we'd never expected to see again, 531 00:37:17,360 --> 00:37:19,946 that's something never to be forgotten. 532 00:37:23,324 --> 00:37:28,079 We were all very tired when we saw 533 00:37:28,163 --> 00:37:29,873 a big light. 534 00:37:32,208 --> 00:37:35,712 Look! Look! It's a ship! 535 00:37:38,173 --> 00:37:40,425 Suddenly, a flicker of hope, 536 00:37:40,508 --> 00:37:43,511 a ship getting closer every minute. 537 00:37:46,973 --> 00:37:49,392 Coming towards the sight of the wreck 538 00:37:49,517 --> 00:37:53,062 and the lifeboats bobbing about in this freezing, 539 00:37:53,188 --> 00:37:58,151 empty sea, finally is The Carpathia. 540 00:37:58,735 --> 00:38:01,654 She's come as fast as she could through the ice flows, 541 00:38:01,738 --> 00:38:03,990 through the night responding to 542 00:38:04,073 --> 00:38:06,451 Jack Phillips's distress calls. 543 00:38:15,043 --> 00:38:20,215 Nothing has ever looked so good to me as 544 00:38:20,340 --> 00:38:22,967 the lights from The Carpathia. 545 00:38:24,469 --> 00:38:28,765 Even through my numbness, I began to realize I was saved. 546 00:38:42,529 --> 00:38:45,740 At last, The Carpathia was alongside, 547 00:38:45,865 --> 00:38:48,910 and people were being taken up by rope ladder. 548 00:38:51,913 --> 00:38:54,082 One man was dead. 549 00:38:55,416 --> 00:38:57,418 I passed him and went up the ladder. 550 00:39:05,635 --> 00:39:08,721 The dead man was Phillips. 551 00:39:09,889 --> 00:39:13,560 He had died on the raft of exposure and cold, I guess. 552 00:39:17,772 --> 00:39:20,066 He stood his ground until the crisis had passed; 553 00:39:20,149 --> 00:39:23,736 then he collapsed. 554 00:39:34,914 --> 00:39:39,043 No survivor knows better than I 555 00:39:39,127 --> 00:39:42,463 the cruelty of disappointment. 556 00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:49,470 I had a husband to search for. 557 00:39:52,307 --> 00:39:55,351 A husband whom I believed would be found 558 00:39:55,476 --> 00:39:58,563 in one of the boats. 559 00:40:03,318 --> 00:40:06,654 He was not there. 560 00:40:11,701 --> 00:40:14,245 My friends were all among the missing when 561 00:40:14,329 --> 00:40:16,414 the role was called. 562 00:40:18,374 --> 00:40:21,794 The loss affected me badly. 563 00:40:27,842 --> 00:40:29,510 The big narrative is always going 564 00:40:29,636 --> 00:40:33,222 to be about heroism and loss and sacrifice, 565 00:40:33,932 --> 00:40:36,517 but the Titanic was a disaster. 566 00:40:38,519 --> 00:40:41,856 These are real people's lives that are lost. 567 00:40:43,191 --> 00:40:45,777 Real people who suffered. 568 00:41:08,758 --> 00:41:12,887 - Shut all dampers! - Dropping! 569 00:41:13,221 --> 00:41:15,723 The engineers were the heroes, I think. 570 00:41:16,265 --> 00:41:18,267 They kept going in some minutes before the Titanic 571 00:41:18,393 --> 00:41:20,353 went out of sight. 572 00:41:20,812 --> 00:41:22,772 Not a man of them was saved. 573 00:41:28,194 --> 00:41:31,698 In 1912, it was taken for granted that the price 574 00:41:31,781 --> 00:41:34,575 of a first-class ticket included a greater 575 00:41:34,701 --> 00:41:36,744 likelihood of surviving. 576 00:41:38,705 --> 00:41:41,749 What the Titanic teaches us is what happens when 577 00:41:41,833 --> 00:41:45,086 people's lives are given unequal value. 578 00:41:46,879 --> 00:41:49,382 Every element from your breakfast to how you're 579 00:41:49,465 --> 00:41:51,592 treated in an emergency, 580 00:41:51,676 --> 00:41:54,804 all of that is impacted by class and hierarchy, 581 00:41:54,929 --> 00:41:56,723 and status. 582 00:41:57,181 --> 00:42:00,560 This happened in an age where the British stiff 583 00:42:00,643 --> 00:42:02,937 upper lip was stiffer than ever, 584 00:42:03,062 --> 00:42:04,105 but the reality is, 585 00:42:04,188 --> 00:42:06,524 it doesn't matter how resilient you think you are, 586 00:42:06,607 --> 00:42:09,485 sometimes we're just not capable of processing 587 00:42:09,610 --> 00:42:11,237 that level of horror. 588 00:42:12,113 --> 00:42:14,449 Personal trauma was not recognized. 589 00:42:14,574 --> 00:42:16,951 You just suffered, and you carried on. 590 00:42:17,368 --> 00:42:19,787 Those people who survive, they were just now going 591 00:42:19,871 --> 00:42:21,414 to have to pick up their lives as best 592 00:42:21,497 --> 00:42:23,791 they could and manage. 593 00:42:24,500 --> 00:42:27,795 These are searing memories that never leave them, 594 00:42:27,920 --> 00:42:30,757 and the grief was huge, 595 00:42:30,840 --> 00:42:32,800 but I like to imagine that there were 596 00:42:32,884 --> 00:42:37,013 those who felt that this encounter with death 597 00:42:37,138 --> 00:42:40,641 made them live the rest of their days more fully, 598 00:42:40,975 --> 00:42:43,811 and that they owed it to those who died to live. 599 00:45:02,450 --> 00:45:07,330 I lost my pipes, which I prided myself so much on. 600 00:45:08,289 --> 00:45:12,543 I lost all my clothes and 98 pounds, 601 00:45:12,793 --> 00:45:15,796 which had taken me many years to save. 602 00:45:19,300 --> 00:45:22,595 Here I am stripped of all I had but thankful to 603 00:45:22,678 --> 00:45:25,723 God that He left me my life.